Original subtitles

Good evening, everybody.

This is Mark Mendez and His Music,

broadcasting from the Majestic Hotel, Bergen.

Our next number will be

"Oh, don't the wind blow cold!"

Oh, hello, is that you, Mark?

Strickland speaking.

Good news for you.

I got you a uke player, yeah,

he's a first-class man...

His name's...

Bill Norman.

Who? Norman?

Norman?

Oh, the fellow who was with Cortez.

That's swell.

Lay on.

Yeah... what a terrible business.

Oh, no, no. the police are absolutely baffled.

The gun must have been fitted with a silencer.

How soon can Norman get here?

He's sailing on the Marmoset tonight.

Maybe you'd send one of the boys down to meet him.

Yes, yes.

Slim will go and meet him at the docks.

Okay. That's fine.

Well, Colonel, that's settled.

- Winnie? - Yes, sir.

- Ginger up that call to Bill Norman. - Yes, sir.

You're sure it's an absolutely reliable man?

- Colonel, have I ever let you down? - On the contrary.

Intelligence is deeply indebted to you.

Hello, hello, Strickland speaking.

Is that you, Bill?

All set to sail?

Fine. Hold the line, Colonel Harcourt wants to speak to you.

How do you do, Mr. Norman.

I understand Mr. Strickland has explained the importance of this job.

Our agent in Bergen will contact you as soon as you arrive

and I'm sending my assistant, Conway, to see you on board tonight.

Dover Harbour Station, nine sharp, under the clock.

Yes, sir, I'll be carrying my uke case.

Goodbye and good luck.

- Better get going, Conway. - Yes, sir.

- So long, Mr. Strickland. - So long.

Well, what's it all about this time, Colonel?

Don't tell me you've got something on the great Mendez.

He's the chief Nazi agent in Bergen.

A British subject spying for Hitler?

Born in Hamburg.

A very dangerous man.

He's collecting information about merchant shipping

and passing it on to U-boats.

But how does he manage to tip them off?

That's what Leon was trying to find out when Mendez killed him.

Yes.

- Excuse me. - I must get going. Goodbye.

Thanks very much!

Not a bit, Colonel. Anything, anytime.

- Yes? - Central Pier, Blackpool, sir.

They want a concert party to open Monday night.

- Well, we've got one we can send. - I don't think so, sir.

Yes, we have, right!

Yes, here, we have the Dinkie Doos.

They arrive at Dover tonight.

Go down and catch them before they split up

and send them up to Blackpool.

What? Me?

Go down to Dover tonight, in the black-out, sir?

Yeah, better go at once.

But I've made arrangements. It's my night for A.R.P.

Here's a quid. Take her with you.

- But I... - Go on!

Mr. Stationmaster, I'm looking for the Dinkie Doos.

First door on the left, sir.

No, no, no. They're Mr. Strickland's concert party.

Oh, they came in a quarter of an hour ago, sir.

- That way. - Thanks so much.

My wife and I go on the Bergen boat.

Of what use is one berth in one cabin for me,

and another berth in another cabin for my wife?

She gets sick, what do I do?

I'm sorry, sir, but the boat's full.

I will not permit my wife to be parted from me so.

If we are sick, we must be sick together.

I'm sorry, sir, but I cannot help you.

Excuse me, are you a Dinkie Doo?

She is not. She is a respectable married woman. Go away.

Well, here we are, boys and girls. Home, sweet home.

there's no place like home...

Or would be if we could see it!

Oh, say, you're the Dinkie Doos!

Well, we were. Bless my soul, it's Simmy. How are you?

Oh, thank goodness.

Mr. Strickland sent me down, he's got you a date up in Blackpool,

opening on Monday.

Blackpool! Hooray! Good old Freddie!

You've got to go straight up there tonight.

- Now, are you all here? - Yes, I think so.

Well, let's see. Alf, Parker, Mabel, Gladys.

Hepplewhite, where's Hepplewhite?

Oh! Ee, turned out nice again, hasn't it?

So, that's the lot then.

If you will come to the refreshment room with me,

I'll give you all your tickets.

Hey, hey, we don't want to lose you.

Give us your hand, you take mine.

Ted, take Mabel's, then we'll all keep together.

Give me your hand, George, quick! Ooh... it's cold.

That's not me hand, it's me ukulele.

Wait a minute, I've left my bag.

Don't go, wait a minute, wait for me.

Wait for me, I can't find it, where's my bag?

Be careful, darling.

Let me go first. Give me your hand.

Look out, please mind where you're going.

- I can't find my bag. - Are you all right, dear?

- Come on. - I've got it! Give me your hand.

- Oscar. - Yes, dear.

Someone's got hold of my hand.

It's all right, darling, it's me.

No, my other hand. It's a strange man.

This... Let go of my wife's hand.

Leave off, Ted. This is no time for kidding.

- Give over, Gladys. - This is my wife.

How can Gladys be your wife, when you're already married?

That would be arson.

It is not Gladys. Look for yourself.

Ee, you're right. It isn't Gladys.

I beg your pardon, Miss. I thought you were a Dinkie Doo.

For the second time, she is not a Dinkie Doo,

and leave go of her hand.

Oh, so you'd strike me!

- No! - Police, police!

I didn't... I didn't do anything! You're choking me.

I didn't--

Oh, you kick me?

Oh, oh, police! Police! Police! Police!

Excuse me! Excuse me!

- Watch it! - Excuse me!

Ah, no, sir, you've never set eyes on me before, have you?

No, Alf, never.

You've never seen me before.

No, I remember your face now.

Allow me, sir, what have we here? A musical instrument in case.

I put it on the table, so,

I cover it up with the old school tie,

and I pass the fluence through it.

Now then, watch me closely, ladies and gentlemen,

I have nothing up my sleeves.

No, not even a shirt.

Voilà. Now, sir, open, your case.

Ah, what have we here,

an heirloom, ladies and gents, from his grandad who fell at Waterloo,

or was it King's Cross?

Here, sir!

And here, sir, is your ukulele.

If music be the food of love, play on, Macduff, play on.

But we haven't time to do all that, we'll miss the train.

Go on, George, we've got an audience. I'll go round with the tips.

Then we'll eat tonight.

Ee, that'll be a novelty.

All right

♪ Now in our family we've got a heirloom ♪

♪ They handed it to me a year ago ♪

♪ It's been in our possession Since grandad was a lad ♪

♪ I'll tell you what it is And then you'll know ♪

♪ It's me grandad's Flannelette nightshirt ♪

♪ In it I was christened one day ♪

♪ Down at the church They were in a whirl ♪

♪ No one seemed to know If I were boy or girl ♪

♪ They'd had one or two And they were in a mess ♪

♪ But it's all right Said the preacher rather curt ♪

♪ I've been another quiz And I found out what it is ♪

♪ By his grandad's flannelette shirt ♪

♪ Lordy, Lordy His grandad's flannelette shirt ♪

♪ In 1810 grandfather joined the army ♪

♪ To fight Napoleon across the sea ♪

♪ You've heard about the battle They had at Waterloo ♪

♪ But what was it That brought us victory? ♪

♪ Why, me grandad's Flannelette nightshirt ♪

♪ It saved old England that day ♪

♪ Bonaparte said, "We're undone" ♪

♪ And even Josephine put her gas mask on ♪

♪ They shot our colours down And captured our flag ♪

♪ But we were not downhearted It's a cert ♪

♪ For flying in the gale Everyone could see the tail ♪

♪ Of my grandad's flannelette shirt ♪

♪ Lordy, Lordy Me grandad's flannelette shirt ♪

♪ The other day I got an invitation ♪

♪ To go and join a nudist colony ♪

♪ And as the life was healthy And in the open air ♪

♪ I trotted off as happy as can be ♪

♪ With me grandad's Flannelette nightshirt ♪

♪ I walked up to the door ♪

♪ Someone said, "Now, don't make a fuss ♪

♪ Just take off your clothes And you'll be like us"

♪ Well, I was bashful So I stayed by myself ♪

♪ For with the girls I didn't want to flirt ♪

♪ But when I was asleep They all came and had a peep ♪

♪ At my grandad's flannelette shirt ♪

- ♪ Lordy, Lordy ♪ - ♪ Me grandad's flannelette shirt ♪

- ♪ Lordy, Lordy ♪ - ♪ Me grandad's flannelette shirt ♪

Fourteen and six, George. Good work.

She's leaving in five minutes.

I'll see to the heavy luggage. Meet you on board.

- Who's that? - The chap from Strickland's.

Oh, of course! You haven't heard the glad news?

Freddie Strickland's booked us for the Central Pier, Blackpool.

We open Monday.

Go on...

We got to get up there straight away!

It'll take a long time by train.

Going by boat, old boy.

The railways have all been commandeered by the Ministry of Information.

Fancy! No trains.

Fact. Didn't you hear that chap say he'd meet us aboard?

Yes, I did.

Come on, boys and girls, we can't keep the Queen Mary waiting.

- Five and tuppence, please. - Your turn to push the boat out, George.

What? The Queen Mary?

No, your round, and, George, bring my bag along, there's a pal.

- Hey, wait for me. - Five and tuppence, please.

Here, what's this, a trouser button?

A trouser button...

Well, I'll go to our house, I must have given that porter a sixpence by mistake.

Goodbye.

Hey, just a minute.

Oh! What's to do?

I thought you were never coming. We must hurry, she sails in a few minutes.

Are you the chap from Strickland's?

Sure. My name's Conway.

Afraid you won't have a very comfortable voyage.

She's packed out.

Oh, I don't mind. It's the job at the other end

I'm looking forward to. It sounds champion.

- You'll have quite an exciting time. - I bet I will.

You'll find Mary Wilson a grand person to work with.

I've got to work with a woman?

Of course. Didn't you know? She'll contact you the moment you arrive.

Ee, fancy that.

What do we do? The usual cross-talk act?

Certainly... She'll say, "Do you take early morning tea?"

And your reply is, "No, thanks, just a glass of orange juice."

Nobody'll think anything funny about that.

No, it's perfectly safe.

Now, remember. She'll say, "Do you take early morning tea?"

Then you give her the answer.

Oh, we're only just in time. Here's your ticket.

Have all the others gone aboard?

Looks like it. This is your expenses. Seventy pounds.

- Seventy quid? - Goodbye, and the best of luck to you.

Goodbye.

Goodbye, mister. I'll send you a stick of Blackpool rock!

This is your cabin, sir. Madam's is over here.

But this is absurd.

The man with whom I share must go and sleep in my wife's cabin.

I bet that'll be okay with him, if the missus don't object.

Idiot. My wife will come into number six with me.

But you can't shove the gent in here. What about the lady in the upper berth?

- Ah. - It's all right, Oscar.

I shall be quite safe.

Well, if you are disturbed, darling, call for me. Goodnight.

Goodnight.

- Goodnight, sir. - Eh?

Oh, here you are.

- Thank you, sir. - Goodnight!

Goodnight.

- Oh, Lawson! - Yes.

There'll be only one lady in number nine. The upper berth's cancelled her passage.

- Very good, sir. - Better tell the lower berth's husband...

I think he'll want to move in with her.

Yes, I'll tell him...

In the morning.

Anything I can fetch you, sir?

- Not feeling well, sir? - No.

Oh, that's what they call a grand swell. Had your supper, sir?

I had it, but I haven't got it now.

If I was you, sir, I'd lie down in your cabin, sir.

Shall I take you down to it, sir?

- Oh, must you? - I can't bring the cabin up, sir.

Can't ya? I could.

Ha! You'll be alright when the moon comes up.

Oh, has that got to come up too?

What's your number, sir?

- Nine. - That's aft, sir.

- Where's aft? I'm a stranger on this ship. - This way, sir.

Excuse me, sir, are you the gentleman who ordered a Welsh rabbit?

Ugh!

Oh...

Oh...

Oh...

Oh...

Oh...

Oh...

Oh...

Oh... Oh...

Come in.

- Eh? - Who's there?

- It's me. What do you want? - Open this door!

Who's up there?

Oh!

Open the door!

Or I'll break it open.

You can't come in. You can't come in. There's a lady in the bottom bunk.

I'll break it open.

Oscar! It's that man again!

I've got to get out, what can I do? Ooh!

- I'll break it open. - Oscar! Help!

Help! Help! Your turn.

Excuse me! Excuse me!

I beg your pardon!

Oh!

My fault!

Excuse me!

Gangway! Gangway!

Excuse me! Out the way, please!

Hurry up!

Gangway!

- Gangway! - Let me take your bag, sir.

Thanks, I can run faster without them. Which is the way out?

Can't go till you've been through the customs, sir.

Customs? Fancy customs in...

- Förlåt mig. - Förlåt mig.

- And me. - This way, sir.

Excuse me.

- A lot of foreigners about. - Yes, sir, you get all kinds in Bergen.

Yes. What? B... B... Bergen?

- This is Blackpool! - No sir, Bergen.

Yes, sir, Bergen.

Oh, Mother! I've got to get back.

Tell the captain he's got to take me back to Blackpool! I'm a Dinkie Doo!

Mister, look. I've got the wrong boat,

I've got the wrong luggage and I'm in the wrong place.

Gutt...

Oh, please, ask the captain if he'll take me back, will you?

We'll take you back, sir, but we've got to go to Iceland first.

Iceland... Oh... I'll catch my death of cold.

You are undone... yes?

No, but I will be undone if I don't get back to Blackpool!

The key?

It doesn't belong to me. It's Mr. Arbuckle's.

Yes, that is nice. Have you anything to declare?

No, nothing.

Nothing? Hey, look, cigars!

Ah, a joke, eh?

No.

Explain, please.

Eh, look, it's empty.

- Oh! - Ah!

What is this? Open, please.

- Me? Open? - Please.

I was afraid of that.

See... look... nothing in it.

Thank you, I will see for myself.

Go on, there's nothing in it. You have a look.

More joke, eh?

You give me the bird, eh?

No, I didn't know it was there, mister.

Ah, so you didn't know this was there...

Und this... Und this... A lot of nothings, eh?

Well, it isn't mine, it belongs to Mr. Arbuckle.

And where's Mr. Arbuckle?

I don't know... Perhaps he's in here too.

Und what's this, und this?

Tobacco, eh?

I don't know what it is.

Then I will taste it and see.

No, no, you mustn't. It belongs to Mr. Arbuckle.

Give it to me.

He assaulted my wife. Most disgraceful behaviour.

I want him arrested.

There he is! Commissar, arrest that man.

Arrest that man.

Arrest him.

Where is my wife?

CUSTOMS

- Oh, there you are. In here. - Oh, thanks!

Stop that taxi!

What's the hurry?

Oh, you don't know what a pal you've been to me.

Not at all. I'm Slim Selwyn. Mark Mendez sent me to meet you.

Who, Mendez? Mark Mendez?

- You are Bill Norman, aren't you? - No, I'm George Hepplewhite.

I got into the wrong cabin--

If you aren't Bill Norman, what are you doing with that uke?

- I play it. I'm a Dinkie Doo. - You're a Dinkie what?

A Dinkie Doo.

You know, the Dinkie Doo Concert party. We are on our way to Blackpool

for the season.

But what are you doing here in Bergen?

One of Strickland's chaps put me on the boat.

He did, did he?

Yes. Well, I didn't know--

Oh, I see what's happened,

Strickland was sending Mendez a new uke player.

As he couldn't get Bill Norman, he sent you instead.

What, me...

Well. I'm not that good,

but I've never played with anybody as good as Mark Mendez before.

Well, if you've got anything, your fortune's made.

Here we are.

You go in and register and I'll explain to Mr. Mendez.

Be careful, please...

Sorry. I beg your pardon...

Oh...

Sorry, I beg your pardon. Excuse me.

- Oh! How do you do? - Good morning, sir.

We have a room reserved for you on the first floor.

How did you know I was coming?

You're Mr. Mendez' new ukulele player, aren't you?

Yes, that's right. Probably I'll be.

Mr. Strickland sent you, didn't he?

Yes, fancy you knowing all that.

Do you take early morning tea?

If you want me to.

I said, do you take early morning tea?

Yes, sweet. I mean, four lumps...

- I've just seen Mendez. - Oh, what did he say?

He wants to hear what you can do.

- What, now? - Yes.

The boys are just rehearsing, I'll take you along.

- Oh. - Please.

Darling, here, let me go first.

Oh! Good morning, missis.

One bedroom for myself and my wife. One, you understand? One!

Yes, sir. Will you register?

Greta, will you take over for a minute? I just want to write a note.

Here he is, Mark... George Hepplewhite. This is Mr. Mendez.

Pleased to meet you.

Well, I don't know your name, but maybe you'll fill the gap.

- Thank you, Mr. Mendez. - This is Iris.

Oh. Nice weather we're having.

We'd better see what you can do, Mr. Hepplewhit.

- Hepplewhite. - Pardon.

Granted.

Excuse me.

Here, do you know "Mr. Wu's a window cleaner now"?

I don't care if he's a vacuum cleaner.

All I want to know is can you play the uke?

Yes, yes, you listen, yes. He, he.

♪ Mr. Wu no longer has a laundry ♪

♪ Sad to say the business was a flop ♪

♪ He shouted, "What a hope!" ♪

♪ As he chewed a bar of soap ♪

♪ And then put up The shutters of the shop ♪

♪ Said Mr. Wu, "What shall I do?" ♪

♪ And Mr. Wu's a window cleaner now ♪

♪ The laundry, it didn't pay ♪

♪ Now there's no clean collars Down Limehouse way ♪

♪ When he goes out working Interest he arouses ♪

♪ Polishing the windows With worn out ladies' blouses ♪

♪ He wears a pair of camiknicks To save his Sunday trousers ♪

♪ 'Cause Mr. Wu's a window cleaner now ♪

♪ Now little Chinese wifie Each day is getting madder ♪

♪ Tearing her silk stockings Her husband's makes her sadder ♪

♪ All day long he wants To keep on running up the ladder ♪

♪ 'Cause Mr. Wu's a window cleaner now ♪

Acha-cha-cha.

♪ With a hidi-hi and one-o-two ♪

♪ He had his eyesight tested A most important matter ♪

♪ Through a bathroom window A lady, he peeps at her ♪

♪ His eyesight's getting better But his nose is getting flatter ♪

♪ 'Cause Mr. Wu's a window cleaner now ♪

♪ Said Mr. Wu, "What shall I do?" ♪

♪ And Mr. Wu's a window cleaner now ♪

♪ The laundry, it didn't pay ♪

♪ Now there's no clean collars Down Limehouse way ♪

♪ Customers he's washed for Now are in bad humours ♪

♪ They feel quite neglected And I've heard the rumours ♪

♪ Lots of girls on winter nights Go out without their garters ♪

♪ 'Cause Mr. Wu's a window cleaner now ♪

Hey!

Do I get the job?

Well, you're not bad.

And I want somebody at once, I'll give you 20 quid a week.

- How much? - Well, make it 25.

Twenty five?

I can't make it any more, take it or leave it.

I'll take it.

Mark, you're wanted on the phone.

- Thanks. Carry on, Scruffy. - Come on, boys. Let's try it over again.

- Just wait a minute. I've bust a string. - Okay.

We'll take the last three bars again.

Let's take the last three bars again.

Well, didn't I tell you?

Oh, look what I've found in my uke case.

"Meet me tonight after the show. Room 64. M."

- Well. - But I don't know anybody in Bergen.

- You don't? - No.

"M"?

- Why, it's from Mendez, of course. - Mr. Mendez?

Sure. Room 64 is where he signs his contracts.

Is it really? Ee, fancy that, 25 quid,

but why should he--

- Come on! - Hurry up. They need you.

All right. I'm coming.

I'll have them orchestrated and put it in my next broadcast.

Right. Goodbye.

Three merchant ships

- and the Newcastle- - Bergen boat, tomorrow night's broadcast.

Here, look at this, Mark.

Well, what about it?

Hepplewhite found it in his uke case. And he doesn't know a soul in Bergen.

Hey, someone's tried to contact him, under cover.

Maybe they meant this for Norman,

they didn't know this boob had turned up instead.

If he is a boob. He might be another British agent.

- His passport would tell us that. - How?

Microscopic sign on the photograph.

The British agents use for mutual identification.

- Get hold of it. - By force?

By your fascination.

Park yourself in Room 64.

If anyone comes in but Hepplewhite, it's our friend M.

How do you do?

Oh, beg your pardon, I thought this was room 64.

So it is. Come and sit down, won't you?

Uh, thanks very much.

I've come here to meet Mr. Mendez.

Oh, well, I think I'd better wait outside.

I'm frightened I might break my contract.

You aren't scared of me, are you?

No, I'm scared of me...

Then sit down.

Well...

- Do you care for One Night of Love? - Mother!

It's the name of my perfume.

Nice, isn't it?

I better not sniff anymore or there won't be enough left to go round.

Let me put some behind your ear.

Oh, I can't sniff behind my ear, unless I jerk my head round quick.

No, you're tickling, don't.

Oh, there, you've made me spill some on your coat.

Let me rub it off.

Stop it, it tickles.

Oh, how strong you are.

D'you think so? Do you know what they say about me back home?

I've got the eyes of a dog, strength of a fox,

speed of a hare, brains of an ox.

Ee, I've got that wrong somewhere.

You must be strong.

I've never seen a man with such broad shoulders.

No, I don't suppose you have. But most men have their shoulders up here.

But the muscles go right down to here.

Do they? I always thought they were my bicycling muscles. Now go away.

You're tickling me, let me go, you cheeky fast cat.

Oh, you're tickling me! Mother! I'm going to fall!

Come back here, you...

You're tickling me! I'm going to fall!

Come out of there at once!

- Oscar! - What's the matter, dear?

Look!

You again, so you throw

ceilings at me now!

Get away!

Oh, beg your pardon!

- Oscar! It's that man again! - Oh!

Oscar!

Oh! Another one?

What sort of a hotel is this?

You've picked a fine time to play around with your girlfriend.

Ee, no, you're wrong.

I don't want the hotel to think that I--

- I never met her before this morning. - Fast worker, eh?

No. It was her. She wouldn't let me alone.

She's had her eye on me ever since I came here.

I wonder if she's working for Mendez?

Of course she is.

Didn't you know?

I see.

You are a fast worker.

Now listen. I've discovered the secret of Mendez' success--

There's nothing clever about that. It's his music, of course.

So, you've tumbled to it too.

And I thought I'd been smart.

It's as plain as the nose on your face.

Oh, no, I didn't mean that. Yours is a nice nose.

And I like your face too.

Yours would be a nice face even without a nose.

Never mind that now.

It was Leon who first got on the track.

He noticed that fresh U-boat sinkings followed each of Mendez' broadcasts.

U-boats, Mendez?

Poor old Leon was killed the day after that.

Killed, but I--

Look here, will you let me finish?

I realised then that Mendez must be using a musical code

to send his shipping information to the U-boats.

And that's where you come in.

You've got to get the key to that code.

Me?

Well, the British Intelligence Service

didn't send you out here to twiddle your thumbs.

British Intel... I'm not intelligent...

I'm a Dinkie Doo.

A what?

But you are Bill Norman, aren't you?

No, I'm George Hepplewhite. There's been a mistake.

But if you thought I was, then you must be a...

You're not a young lady at all, you're a British spy.

Oh, fancy, I didn't know they had spies like you.

Oh, what a colossal fool I've made of myself.

Aye, what a muck-up I've landed meself in.

But now that you know, you've got to keep quiet about this...

Promise?

Cross my heart. I'd go further than that for you, miss.

How far would you go?

- As far as you like. - You would?

- Yes. - Splendid.

You realise, of course, this is dangerous work?

- Yes. What? - Mendez is a killer.

But once you've got the key to his code

we've settled his hash for good.

Oh, well, perhaps I'm not the right chap for the job after all.

Scared?

No, no, but Mother wouldn't like me to get mixed up with anything underhanded.

I thought so.

I don't suppose you would see anything underhand at all in Mendez

sinking a lot of unarmed merchant ships?

Oh, yes, I do. You must understand--

Well, you can blame yourself

if your mother has to go without her breakfast bacon

for the rest of the war.

- Mother without-- - Goodbye, Mr. Hepplewhite.

Just go on playing your ukulele while other people's ships go down.

I... I... Yes, but...

Blimey, I'll tell her...

Sauce...

Coming in here as cool as you like,

treating me like a piece of dirt.

Who does she think she is?

Secret agent.

Mendez, a German spy.

Tell it to me aunt Fanny.

It does seem a bit funny that fellow sending me upstairs.

Catch me getting bumped off like the other fellow did.

She can get bumped up if she wants to. Fat lot I care.

Nice girl, too...

It's a pity she can't keep a civil tongue in her head.

I feel sorry for her.

And no bacon for my mother' breakfast.

It's a shame.

It's a downright crying shame, that's what it is.

More than flesh and blood can stand.

What was it she said?

If I got the key of the code, I'd settle his hash.

She couldn't call me a coward if I got that for her.

I'd be a hero.

There'd be medals and things.

Arise, Sir George Hepplewhite, V.C.

Who's afraid of that snake Mendez?

Me? No, sir!

I'll say, "Come on, Mendez, you rat!"

"Hand over the key of the code

if you don't want me to blow the brains out of you!"

Me, afraid of him?

I'll show him whether I'm afraid or not.

Look out, Mr. Mendez, here I come!

What the devil d'you mean by breaking into my room without knocking?

I... I was thinking... Am I...

- I'm sorry, Mr. Mendez. - Well, now you're here, what d'you want?

- I want the key. - Key?

Well, the broadcast tomorrow. I... I want to know what key it is in.

Oh, is that all you've come here for?

Well, yes, Mr. Mendez.

As it happens, you can have it. It's finished.

- Thank you, Mr. Mendez. - That's not it.

I thought I could do a bit of practising.

Here it is.

It's straightforward stuff,

so I want it played note for note, you understand?

- Yes, Mr. Mendez. - And no twiddly bits of your own.

Yes, sir... No, Mr. Mendez.

- Hop it! I'm busy. - Thank you, Mr. Mendez.

What are you waiting for?

It's this music. It's a bit difficult.

Don't give me that stuff, hand it over!

I haven't got it... I haven't got the hang of it.

What's difficult about it?

That.

That's four bars raised. That means you are tacit.

- By meself? - Oh, get out, will you!

- Get out! - Yes.

That was it! That was it. I'll bet my bottom dollar that was it.

Oh, oh.

It's it! It's it. Oh, Mother, I--

Oh...

Oh...

Ugh!

Ow!

Ahg!

Hey, water in this bin...

Ooh!

Oh, oh!

Somebody get me out. Stop it!

Me insides's coming out...

Oh, I can't stop it.

Oh, me stomach's inside out.

Here!

Get your leg out! Half a mo,

I'll scrape you down.

Ah, Mother!

Help!

Oh, no.

I'm falling down.

Thanks, Bill.

What do you think you are doing?

I'm looking for something.

What thing?

Something worth its weight in gold.

Worth its weight in gold?

Yes, something priceless.

What!

Ah!

Ow!

- Where's first? - Majestic Hotel!

Whoopee!

It's it, it's the key right enough.

- Are you sure? - I'm certain.

Let's have a look.

I can't see. Now I can. Them funny lines, what do they all mean?

It's as simple as A, B, C.

D'you see all these squares each marked with a letter?

Yes.

Well, the letter means place,

and see those numbers on the bottom? They mean time.

Oh, we've done it! We've done it.

We've got old Mendez where we want him! Beg your pardon.

Yes, but we've got to find out how he sends the letter and the number

to the U-boats.

- Yes, so we have. - Where's that music Mendez gave you?

It's over here.

Play it.

- Play it! I can't. - Why not?

Well, it's written for different kinds of instruments.

- Then play what you can of it. - Well, you hold it.

It goes something like this.

How does that bit go?

Well, that's for the trumpets. I can't blow down a uke.

Try it.

Try and blow?

- Now here's a bit for three trombones. - Play it.

Play it? Do I look like three trombones?

Play it, please!

All right.

Now play the trumpet bit again.

Wait a minute.

H.

Play the last bit again.

- Six. - H, six. What does that mean?

Believe it or not, it's common old garden Morse.

- See for yourself what H-six means. - Hold that.

H is a square half way between Norway and Aberdeen.

That's right on the course - of the Newcastle- - Bergen line.

And six is 3:30 a.m.

- George! We've got it. - Have we?

When the trumpets and trombones play that break in tonight's broadcast,

it's Mendez' message to the German U-boats,

telling them that in square H at 3:30 a.m.

there'll be merchant shipping to be sent to the bottom.

I'd like to get my foot on Mendez' square H.

Play the first bit of all again.

Wait a minute.

AK-AK! That's the call signal meaning "stand by."

What does this bit mean that I play?

Ta-ta-ta. AK-AR. That means end of the message.

You know, you are a clever young lady.

Let's look again.

Let me help you. I'll hold it still.

- I can manage. - Well, I won't bother then.

- Are we going to stop Mendez broadcasting? - No, we're not going to--

stop him broadcasting.

- We'll let him go on. - But you--

Mendez tells the U-boats where to go by means of this musical code.

Yes.

Suppose the Admiralty get a copy of that code.

Oh... Oh, oh...

And then our destroyers can go where Mendez says

and wait for the U-boats,

And then...

Well, Mrs. Duckett, your mother's won a bucket!

♪ Though plans may often go wrong ♪

♪ Let them hear your voice ♪

♪ You'll find that rhythm and song ♪

♪ Make the world rejoice ♪

♪ Make life go with a swing Laugh at trouble and sing ♪

♪ Tra-la-la ♪

♪ Count your blessings and smile ♪

♪ While you're playing your part ♪

♪ Keep a song in your heart ♪

♪ Tra-la-la ♪

♪ Count your blessings and smile ♪

♪ Sing low, sing high ♪

♪ Isn't it grand, beating the band Who wants to die? ♪

♪ Oh, what a happy land! ♪

♪ Show them what you can do ♪

♪ Make a hullabaloo ♪

♪ Ho-ho-ho-ho, ha-ha-ha-ha ♪

♪ Count your blessings and smile ♪

♪ You gotta swing that music Swing it around ♪

♪ Da-da-di-la ♪

♪ Get together, swing it around ♪

♪ Make life go with a swing... ♪

- Is it on yet? - Not yet, sir.

- Is that the station? - Yes.

♪ Count your blessings and smile ♪

♪ While you're playing Your own little part ♪

You gotta keep a song in your heart ♪

Da-da-da ♪

♪ Count your blessings and smile ♪

♪ Sing low ♪

♪ Sing high ♪

- ♪ Isn't it grand, beating the band ♪ - Who wants to die? ♪

What a happy land ♪

♪ Show them what you can do Make a hullabaloo ♪

♪ Ho-ho-ho-ho, ha-ha-ha-ha ♪

♪ Da-di-da-da-ta-ta ♪

♪ Count your blessings ♪

-♪ One ♪ - ♪ Two ♪

-♪ Three... ♪ - ♪ Count your blessings ♪

- Four ♪ - Five ♪

- ♪ Six ♪ - ♪ Count your blessings and smile! ♪

Stand by.

There it is, stand by.

H.

H.

- Six. - 3:30.

3:30.

End of message. Stations!

That is all.

♪ Make life go with a swing ♪

♪ Laugh at trouble and sing ♪

Oh, beg your pardon.

♪ Count your blessings and smile ♪

While you're playing your part ♪

Keep a song in your heart ♪

Oh, dash it!

♪ Count your blessings and smile ♪

♪ Sing low, sing high ♪

♪ Who wants to die? ♪

♪ Show them what you can do ♪

♪ Make a hullabaloo ♪

♪ Ho-ho-ho-ho-ah-ha-ha-ha ♪

♪ Count your blessings and smile ♪

- ♪ Smile ♪ - Come on!

♪ Smile! ♪

What?

The new number you played last night was not a success.

I regret to tell you we have lost three of our best customers.

Three! It's impossible.

Our competitors have learned the trick of writing numbers such as this.

It is your fault. I will visit you later.

That was Schwartz.

He says three U-boats were sunk last night.

He thinks the British have got hold of the code, and he's right.

If little George's the wolf in sheep's clothing after all,

then I'm Shirley Temple.

- It's as plain as a pikestaff. - What is?

They're using Hepplewhite and he doesn't know it.

But two can play at that game. Scopolamine.

Scopo... What?

You remember the trials in Moscow and the confessions?

Uh-hu.

Scopolamine, is that the drug they used beforehand to make them talk?

- Right. Go and find Hepplewhite, Slim. - Sure.

Oh, waiter, four coffees. Send it up to my room.

Certainly, sir.

Make it three, little Georgie panics at the sight of me.

Have you read the papers? Three U-boats sunk!

Very good, sir.

I'll have them sent up to your room.

Eh? Oh, beg your pardon.

Sorry, Mary, I...

Listen, this is urgent. You've got to...

As I said, sir, I'll send them straight up to your room.

Yes, and about time too.

Any more sauce from you and I'll report you to the manager.

- I am the manager, sir. - Yes. Eh?

How dare you be impertinent to a guest?

I'm very sorry, sir.

Don't answer back, take a week's notice.

Ee, you cannot do that. You'll muck up everything.

I beg your pardon, sir.

Well, it's her old mother, she has to support her.

- Eh? - And...

And she's a lot of little children, all of her own. It's all my fault.

I mean, if she gets married she'll have a lot of little...

Don't sack her, Mr. Manager.

Very well, be more careful, Miss Wilson.

- Good afternoon, sir. - Good afternoon.

Listen, you've got to get away from here, now.

- Away? Where? - Back to England.

If Mendez finds out about us, he'll stop at nothing.

Here's your ticket. It's the S.S. Macaulay.

Sails at nine tonight.

- Your key, madam. - Thank you.

But I can't leave you on the job by yourself.

Thank you, sir, thank you.

My job's nearly finished. I'm expecting orders to leave.

I'm not leaving without you.

Oh, there you are, George. The boss wants you.

Me? Mendez?

Yes, he wants to have a talk with you. Come on.

Don't tell me you've fallen for that boob.

Course not. Besides, he isn't a boob.

Eh, eh. No need to bite my head off.

Sorry.

Come in, Hepplewhite.

Shut the door, Slim.

It's about last night's broadcast.

I thought it might be.

I understand, it was surprisingly effective.

Go on.

And I put that down entirely to you.

Do you?

So, you're going to get what's coming to you right now.

I'm going to raise your salary.

I'm going to give you another 20 quid a week.

Oh! Thank you, Mr. Mendez.

Thank you. I'll go and put it into the savings bank.

Stay and have a cup of coffee.

Well... N... No, I don't mind if I don't.

You don't think I'm going to poison you

because I'm jealous of your success, do you?

Makes you feel full of beans, doesn't it?

Yes, coffee beans.

Glad you like it. Have some more.

- Slim. - Yes.

Phew.

D'you know, when I came in here I was shivering in my shoes.

Really? Why?

Well, a couple of ugly customers like you.

Why, don't you like me, Hepplewhite?

Not much, and I hate the sight of him.

Do you do anything besides playing the ukulele?

- Oh, yes, I'm a spy. - Holy smoke...

Now tell us about it. It must be a very fascinating occupation.

Go on, Mr. Mendez.

No, you go on, George.

I can't teach my grandmother to suck eggs.

I'm a spy, you're a spy, he's a spy. Tra-la-la, we're all spies.

- How long have you been at it? - Oh, a couple of days.

But last night's show will put me on top of the bill.

Really?

- Why? - Why?

Because I sank three U-boats.

You amaze me.

Go on, Mr. Mendez,

kidding again? They were your U-boats I sank.

Of course, I'd forgotten that.

There you are now,

giving yourself away.

You know what, when I tell Moher how I diddled him,

she won't stop laughing for a week.

How did you diddle me?

How?

Well...

I pinched your code while you were

singing in your bath.

You've got a rotten voice.

- What did you do with it? - I gave it to Mary.

Mary? Mary who?

Mary, Mary, quite contrary.

Will you marry me and become Lady George Hepplewhite, V.C.

Mary who?

Mary Wilson.

Mary Wilson? Who's she?

The girl at the reception desk.

Hello.

Yes, speaking.

Oh, is that you, Schwartz? Hold the line a minute, will you?

Get him back to his room. We'll fix him later.

Sorry to keep you waiting.

Yes, I've found out who it is.

I can't tell you on the telephone. You know my room number.

I'll be waiting for you.

How did you diddle me? How did you diddle me?

How did you diddle me?

Don't you like me, Hepplewhite?

Don't you like me Hepplewhite?

What did you do with it? What did you do with it?

What did you do with it?

Good evening, Herr Hitler.

This is Mark Mendez speaking.

The first item on our programme this evening

is the execution of Mary Wilson and George Hepplewhite.

Stick 'em up yous guys.

[both, in German] Kamerad! Kamerad!

What have you done with Mary Wilson?

She's in a hot spot where you'll never find her.

Says you.

Mary! Mary! Where are you?

George! I'm half baked. Save me! George!

Don't worry, love. I'm on my way!

- Here I am! - George!

George!

George, you're wonderful.

I know I am.

Ah-ha!

- So it's you again. - Where is Mary Wilson?

Hand her over.

All right, here she comes.

- My hero! - Mary, will you marry me?

True marriages are made in heaven.

Suits me. All aboard. Here we go.

- Have you anything to declare? - Yes.

Yes, four no trumps.

You can't come in. You haven't got the ace of knaves.

The ace of knaves? Who is he?

Adolf Hitler.

Now, I'll not be long, love.

You pick out a nice soft cloud for us both.

I'll be back in time for dinner.

- Goodbye, dear. So long. - Toodle-oo.

All present and correct, Sir George!

My Lord, the barrage awaits!

- Very good. - Hurray!

Goodbye!

Good-bye! Toodle-oo. I'll send you some Berlin rock.

The Spaniard Christopher Columbus, who tripped experienced German Scholars,

was supported by counsels and instruments...

Hey, you!

Hey, windbag!

Adolf!

Put a sock in it!

For four years, simple soldiers have been fighting for our issues.

Well, you've asked for it!

Look out, Adolf, I'm coming out for you.

And with determination, I'll wipe this British Empire from the face of the earth.

- Hello! I want you... - Why?

You're my last territorial demand in Europe.

You Schweinehund!

For that I'll knock your head off on the block.

Not if I knock your block off first.

Oh...

Oh! The band!

And so, Mendez, if those instructions are carried out,

our failure of last night will be partly redeemed.

Now, let's check the arrangements.

U-36 surfaces at two o'clock out in the fjord,

four miles due west of here,

I board her and radio instructions to U-58 and U-93,

giving them the positions

of the British troopships Hurricane and Magnificent.

Right, and you remain aboard the U-36 when she attacks the Macaulay,

which sails from here at nine thirty.

I promise you there'll be no interference this time.

Oh, what about Hepplewhite and the Wilson girl, Herr Schwartz?

You will use your discretion, Herr Selwyn.

Steamship Macaulay speaking. Majestic Hotel?

Hold the line, please. Your call, miss.

Is that you, Greta? Did you give him my note?

The door's locked and there's no answer to the phone.

But you must find him. It's urgent. He's in danger.

I'll try once more.

She's not there?

Is Miss Wilson off duty?

No, Mr. Mendez. Her mother is dangerously ill.

She's sailing tonight for England.

- On the Macaulay? - I believe so.

Well, she's an excellent ship. I'm sure she'll have a pleasant journey.

Oh, the key.

Oh!

Oh!

- There you are-- - No, can't wait, the band!

Wait a minute, message for you. It's important.

Thank you!

Well!

Excuse me!

Gangway, gangway.

You take over from me after the first number.

- What number are we starting with? - What the dev--

Excuse me!

Excuse me!

We start with "Oh, don't the wind blow cold!"

- I get you. - Pity. He was a good uke player.

Good evening, everybody.

This is Mark Mendez

And His Music broadcasting to you from the Majestic Hotel, Bergen.

We start our programme tonight with your new favourite,

"Oh, don't the wind blow cold!"

Oh, half past eight!

- "Oh, don't the wind blow cold." - Eh?

We haven't played this number since poor old Leon got his.

- Got his what? - Since he was shot.

- Ooh! - That's right.

- He was sitting exactly where you are now. - Oh!

Quick, Slim, the lights!

Get the boys round the exits and don't let him get away.

Oh, it's you!

"It's that man again."

♪ Some folk like the weather cold ♪

♪ It's healthy, they tell you ♪

♪ It may be dense, but where's the sense If your nose keeps turning blue? ♪

♪ On the day that I was born And just ten minutes old ♪

♪ I popped my head 'neath the clothes And said, "Oh, don't the wind blow cold" ♪

♪ Sailor Joe got shipwrecked on a raft That pitched and rolled ♪

♪ He yelled and raved As his shirt he waved ♪

♪ Oh, don't the wind blow cold ♪

♪ There's no sense in shivering Until you start to freeze ♪

♪ What's the use of quivering And shaking at the knees ♪

♪ He stood there in his little vest Just like a two year old ♪

♪ Then a mermaid's head popped up and said "Oh, don't the wind blow cold" ♪

♪ While Miss Jones was in her bath Our curate called, I'm told ♪

♪ Saw the door ajar, giggled "There you are" ♪

♪ Oh, don't the wind blow cold ♪

♪ There's no sense in shivering Until you start to freeze ♪

♪ What's the use of quivering And shaking at the knees ♪

♪ Six fan dancers did their dance Six fan dancers bold ♪

-♪ They only had five fans ♪ - So what?

♪ Oh, don't the wind blow cold ♪

♪ I saw some lovely bathing belles Upon the beach they rolled ♪

♪ They jumped to their feet When I said "Tweet, tweet" ♪

♪ Oh, don't the wind blow cold ♪

♪ When Godiva rode her horse Round Coventry, I'm told ♪

♪ She cried and sobbed "My hair I've bobbed" ♪

♪ Oh, don't the wind blow cold ♪

♪ There's no sense in shivering Until you start to freeze ♪

♪ What's the use of quivering And shaking at the knees ♪

Oh!

♪ A girl I cuddled in the park Said "Please let go your hold" ♪

♪ Something ripped And I think it slipped ♪

♪ Oh, don't the wind blow cold ♪

Ah, ha, never touched me!

Whoa-- Aah!

Ah, Mother!

Somebody get me down!

Oh!

Oscar!

Hey, mister. The Macaulay. Have you seen the Macaulay?

- Macaulay? - Yes. Thanks.

- I can't see her. Where is she? - She's out of sight.

- What? Gone? Sailed? - Half an hour ago.

Oh, Mother, I must catch it. Oh!

Is that boat all set to go?

[man, in German] Jawohl!

Good. We'll just about be on time.

The U-boat surfaces at two o'clock,

three miles due south of Snarøen, Did you get that, Olaf?

- Jawohl! - Now get going!

- Hurry, Olaf. - Jawohl!

There she is, just coming up.

There she is, sir!

Ah! Good.

- Herr Mendez? - Nice timing, Commander.

You have the information?

Movements of three troopships and the Macaulay.

Excellent! You come with me.

You radio the other two boats and we ought to be able to bag the lot.

Your man, he'd better come aboard. He might talk.

- Olaf? You needn't worry about him. - All the same, we take no chances.

Just as you say, Commander.

Olaf, come aboard!

- And set the boat adrift. - Jawohl!

Go below.

I'll teach these British to play tricks with me.

I've got a little debt to pay on board the Macaulay.

Sure. We should submerge.

Where is this fellow?

Olaf!

Jawohl.

- Now hurry, will ya? - - - Jawohl.

Come down now, please.

- Go ahead, Olaf. - Jawohl.

Close lower lid.

Diving stations.

- Slow ahead both. - Slow ahead both.

Take her to 15 meters.

Flood number 1-2-7-8.

Flood 1-2-7-8.

Fifteen meters, sir.

Fifteen meters, sir.

Radius, fifteen meters.

- Full ahead both. - Full ahead both.

- 2-0-3 degrees. - 2-0-3 degrees it is, sir.

Keep her at 15 meters.

You have the details of the ships?

Yes, they're all here, three troopships and the Macaulay.

Good.

I will wireless them to our sister craft.

Here, take this to the wireless operator.

- Come ahead to my quarters. - Thanks.

Olaf, you remain here.

- Aye! - What?

Jawohl.

From the Commander. U-58 and 93. Urgent.

Right away!

It's all right.

Hello, hello. Hello, U-36

calling U-58. Calling U-58.

Hello, hello.

U-36

calling U-93. Calling U-93.

U-58, U-58.

- Stand by. - Ready.

U-58, U-58, commander's orders.

Stand by to attack British troopship Magnificent.

British troopship Magnificent.

Latitude...

Hello, latitude...

Repeat it.

Latitude.

Latitude.

- - - U-36, repeat latitude. - Hello, U-58.

U-58, can you hear me?

Hello, U-58, U...

U-58 calling U-36.

Hello! S.S. Macaulay.

I don't know your telephone number, but it's urgent...

Hello, S.S. Macaulay.

- Allo, allo, allo. - Hello.

Sorry you've been troubled. Hello, hello, S.S. Macaulay...

Hello, hello.

Hello, S.S. Macaulay.

Good evening.

You are about to hear our news in English.

The entire British Fleet was sunk last night off Wigan Pier

by order of Mr. Winston Churchill.

I will now tell you--

Haw! Haw! I'd tell you a few things if I had time.

Hello, hello, S.S. Macaulay, answer.

Hello, S.S. Macaulay answering.

Ah, don't go away. Hello, S.S. Macaulay. Can you hear me?

Yes! who are you?

I'm a Dinkie Doo.

I don't know her. Is she a British ship?

No, no. I'm in the British Secret Service. I want to speak to Mary.

You want the Queen Mary?

No, not the Queen Mary, the Macaulay.

I want to speak to Mary Wilson. Mary Wilson, one of your messengers.

She's a pretty girl. You'll soon... You can't...

It's a matter of life and death.

I'll try and get her. Keep on the air.

There's trouble with the radio, sir. I can't make contact.

- You've got to! - Keep on trying.

- It is vital. - Yes, sir!

- I can't hold on much longer. - Hold on, she's coming.

Hello.

Hello, is that you, Mary?

Oh, Mary.

George, what's happened to you?

I fell off the boat and missed the chandelier...

I mean, I fell off the chandelier and missed the boat.

Listen, I'll tell you about that later.

Mendez is in a submarine

and he's going to sink the Macaulay.

The Macaulay?

Yes, and three troopships. We've got to stop him.

They are going to radio to their other submarines...

Wait a minute...

George! George, what is it?

What's happened?

George, George!

Shut up.

Sorry.

It's all right now, Mary.

What happened?

Nothing. Just interference.

We got to stop Mendez somehow.

You say he's in a submarine.

- Yes, that's right. Yes. - And where are you?

- I'm in the same submarine. - With Mendez?

Yes, but he doesn't know it... Yet.

What are we going to do?

You might contact a destroyer. Ask him his position.

What's your position?

I'm sitting down.

No, no, where's the submarine?

It's under the sea.

Where about?

How do I know? I can't see out.

What time did you say the Macaulay left?

9:30, and if we can't wireless soon, we'll miss the lot.

We'll go and see him.

Ask him if he's got a chart.

Have you got a chart?

It's no good. I couldn't read a chart if I had one.

Haven't you any idea where you are? Don't you know where you started from?

Started? Oh, yes, that's right... We started three miles due south of...

Yes?

I don't know...

Please do everything you can.

Hang on, George, and try to stop them.

- Me, stop them! By myself? - Excuse me.

They're all big men and they've got plenty of guns.

Mary, tell me what to do? Oh, Mary, tell me what to do.

Mary! Are you there? Mary!

Oh, what a to do. Ooh!

What--

What's happened to him?

I don't know. It must be a shock from the transmitter.

Then no message has been sent. Well, of all the-- Our biggest chance.

We are too late for the troopships.

But we can get to the Macaulay.

- You can? - We ourselves.

- We are on her course now. - Now get her.

There's a girl on that boat that's worth half a dozen troopships to me.

I'll take it.

2-2-0 degrees. Starboard 1-5.

2-2-0 degrees it is. Starboard 1-5.

- Keep her steady. - Steady.

- Full ahead both. - Full ahead both.

Hello, Ferocious calling Macaulay.

Ferocious now searching for enemy submarine. Stand by.

Okay, Ferocious. Message received. Standing by.

That's all we can do, miss.

Ah. There is a ship now.

Is it the Macaulay?

I don't know. We go closer. Starboard 1-0.

Starboard 1-0.

Bring her up to ten meters.

Flood threes and fours.

Flood threes and fours.

Ten meters, sir.

Keep her steady.

Yes, it is the Macaulay.

- Can you get her? - Naturally.

- Port one five. - Port one five.

Action stations.

Number two tube, stand by.

Number two tube, stand by.

Number two tube, load.

Number two tube ready!

Number two tube ready!

Number three and four tubes, stand by.

Three and four tubes, stand by.

Number three and four ready.

- Port three. - Port three.

Amidships.

Let her have one.

Turned out nice again, hasn't it?

- You! You! - Not here!

Ha-ha, never touched me.

Torpedo attack! On deck, miss. Warn the Ferocious.

Ow!

- Nearly got us that time. - Look!

The destroyer!

Torpedo tracks.

Stand by, depth charges.

Fire!

Stations!

Get out!

Get out of my way!

Let me out! Let me out!

Stand by to surface.

She's coming up, sir. Must have got her. She's got a heavy list.

Prepare to board her.

Let me out! Let me out!

Commander, I am afraid I must ask you to come aboard.

Let me out! Mr. Mendez! Let me out!

I can't stop in here. I'd rather be shot.

Ah, Mr. Mendez, your passage is booked to London.

Pity you didn't get the Macaulay.

Perhaps I will.

Let me out!

Ee, Mother! Oh, I'm going...

- A shell! - It's George!

George!

George!

Ah, ha, never touched me.

George, are you hurt? George, say something.

Turned out nice again, hasn't it?