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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,534 --> 00:00:02,634 PREVIOUSLY ON THE BIG C... 2 00:00:02,635 --> 00:00:03,802 I'VE DECIDED TO GO TO THE BAHAMAS 3 00:00:03,803 --> 00:00:04,870 TO A FRIEND'S ART OPENING. 4 00:00:04,871 --> 00:00:06,739 - I WANT TO GO. - REALLY? 5 00:00:06,740 --> 00:00:08,307 FOR MY BIRTHDAY, THAT'S WHAT I WANT TO DO. 6 00:00:08,308 --> 00:00:10,876 all: SURPRISE! 7 00:00:12,045 --> 00:00:13,645 - HELLO. - LENNY! 8 00:00:13,646 --> 00:00:14,713 HI. 9 00:00:14,714 --> 00:00:17,116 YOU HAVEN'T BEEN HAPPY FOR 20 YEARS? 10 00:00:17,117 --> 00:00:18,517 IS THAT WHAT I SAID? 11 00:00:18,518 --> 00:00:20,319 THAT'S BASICALLY THE ENTIRE TIME YOU'VE KNOWN ME. 12 00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:21,820 HOW YOU DOING? NICE TO SEE YOU? 13 00:00:21,821 --> 00:00:23,022 FUCK YOU! SUCK MY DICK! 14 00:00:23,023 --> 00:00:24,890 IT'S ME. I'M COMING WITH YOU. 15 00:00:36,269 --> 00:00:38,303 ♪ IT'S SO HARD ♪ 16 00:00:38,304 --> 00:00:43,510 ♪ TO TURN YOUR LIFE OVER ♪ 17 00:00:45,145 --> 00:00:47,046 ♪ STEP OUT ♪ 18 00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:51,985 ♪ OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE ♪ 19 00:00:53,953 --> 00:00:57,489 ♪ IS THIS SOME KIND OF A JOKE? ♪ 20 00:00:57,490 --> 00:01:02,261 ♪ WILL SOMEONE WAKE ME UP SOON ♪ 21 00:01:02,262 --> 00:01:07,699 ♪ AND TELL ME THIS WAS JUST A GAME WE PLAY ♪ 22 00:01:07,700 --> 00:01:13,073 ♪ CALLED LIFE? ♪ 23 00:01:16,209 --> 00:01:18,710 SLOWLY BACK-- SLOWLY BACK UP... 24 00:01:18,711 --> 00:01:19,645 AND STOP. 25 00:01:19,646 --> 00:01:22,448 STOP! STOP. 26 00:01:22,449 --> 00:01:23,749 YOU DIDN'T DO THE ONE-TWO-THREE. 27 00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:25,217 DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY CHILDREN 28 00:01:25,218 --> 00:01:27,586 ARE RUN OVER EVERY YEAR BECAUSE PEOPLE DON'T DO 29 00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:29,221 THEIR ONE-TWO-THREES? 30 00:01:29,222 --> 00:01:32,591 THEY'RE CALLED "MIRRORS," MOM. 31 00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:37,229 DAD'S IN TWO. 32 00:01:37,230 --> 00:01:38,263 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 33 00:01:38,264 --> 00:01:39,531 MOM'S TEACHING ME HOW TO DRIVE. 34 00:01:39,532 --> 00:01:41,767 WHAT THE HELL? HE--HE'S 14. 35 00:01:41,768 --> 00:01:43,569 HE CAN'T EVEN GET HIS PERMIT FOR A YEAR. 36 00:01:43,570 --> 00:01:45,971 I'M NOT ALLOWING HIM TO DRIVE. 37 00:01:45,972 --> 00:01:48,774 I'M TEACHING HIM HOW TO DRIVE. 38 00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:50,809 I JUST THOUGHT WE'D GET IT OVER WITH, 39 00:01:50,810 --> 00:01:53,112 AND I WANTED TO BE THE ONE TO TEACH HIM. 40 00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,746 YOU NEVER USE YOUR TURN SIGNALS. 41 00:01:54,747 --> 00:01:57,082 I KNOW. I'M A REAL MESS, HUH? 42 00:01:57,083 --> 00:02:00,018 OKAY, YOU TEACH HIM HOW TO DRIVE. 43 00:02:00,019 --> 00:02:01,587 I'LL TEACH HIM HOW TO RUN OFF TO THE BAHAMAS. 44 00:02:01,588 --> 00:02:03,822 OH, WAIT, MAYBE YOU SHOULD TEACH HIM THAT TOO? 45 00:02:03,823 --> 00:02:05,491 GUYS... 46 00:02:05,492 --> 00:02:07,726 THIS ISN'T FUN FOR ME. 47 00:02:07,727 --> 00:02:09,795 SORRY, ADAM. 48 00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:11,130 SORRY, BUDDY. 49 00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,265 CAN WE PLEASE BE CIVIL IN FRONT OF HIM? 50 00:02:13,266 --> 00:02:14,800 I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TALK TO YOU ANYMORE 51 00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:16,602 WITHOUT BLOWING UP. 52 00:02:16,603 --> 00:02:18,971 I JUST CAME TO GET A SUIT TO WEAR TO A DINNER 53 00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:20,072 CELEBRATING MY PROMOTION. 54 00:02:20,073 --> 00:02:21,807 YOU GOT THE PROMOTION. 55 00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:24,476 OH, PAUL. 56 00:02:24,477 --> 00:02:25,844 CONGRATULATIONS. 57 00:02:25,845 --> 00:02:27,813 THAT'S HUGE. 58 00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:30,048 CONGRATULATIONS. 59 00:02:30,049 --> 00:02:32,217 DO YOU WANT-- 60 00:02:32,218 --> 00:02:33,819 DO YOU NEED ME TO GO? 61 00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:36,088 WHAT, SO YOU CAN SUCK ALL THE JOY 62 00:02:36,089 --> 00:02:37,189 OUT OF THAT MOMENT FOR ME TOO? 63 00:02:37,190 --> 00:02:38,423 AH, LOOK. SEE? 64 00:02:38,424 --> 00:02:40,259 I CAN'T BE NICE. 65 00:02:49,202 --> 00:02:52,671 THIS SUCKS. 66 00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:54,306 SORRY FOR THE NONMEDICAL LANGUAGE. 67 00:02:54,307 --> 00:02:55,641 WELL, IF THEY'RE ONLY GONNA PAY 68 00:02:55,642 --> 00:02:57,543 FOR 70% OF MY SCANS, THEN I'M THINKING 69 00:02:57,544 --> 00:03:00,479 MAYBE I SHOULD ONLY PAY 70% OF MY PREMIUMS. 70 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:03,115 OR WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO SAVE THE SCANS FOR FANCY OCCASIONS. 71 00:03:03,116 --> 00:03:05,317 YOU CAN'T BE PASSING THOSE OUT LIKE MINTS. 72 00:03:05,318 --> 00:03:07,686 INSURANCE INDUSTRY WORKS GREAT IF YOU NEVER ACTUALLY GET SICK. 73 00:03:07,687 --> 00:03:11,323 WELL, THAT SHIP HAS SAILED. 74 00:03:11,324 --> 00:03:14,293 HAVE WE HEARD ANYTHING FROM THAT CLINICAL TRIAL? 75 00:03:14,294 --> 00:03:16,662 I MEAN, THOSE BABIES ARE FREE, RIGHT? 76 00:03:16,663 --> 00:03:18,030 THEY ARE, YEAH, 77 00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:19,998 AND I'LL LET YOU KNOW AS SOON AS I HEAR. 78 00:03:19,999 --> 00:03:21,700 SO WHEN ARE YOU PROPOSING TO HER? 79 00:03:21,701 --> 00:03:23,735 HOW DID YOU-- HOW DID YOU KNOW? 80 00:03:23,736 --> 00:03:26,672 THERE'S AN ENGAGEMENT RING ON YOUR LAPTOP. 81 00:03:26,673 --> 00:03:29,408 SO EITHER YOU'VE JUST REMOVED IT FROM SOMEONE'S COLON, 82 00:03:29,409 --> 00:03:32,010 OR YOU'RE POPPING THE QUESTION. 83 00:03:32,011 --> 00:03:33,579 OR YOU'RE POPPING THE QUESTION WITH A RING 84 00:03:33,580 --> 00:03:35,514 FROM SOMEONE'S COLON, BUT LET'S HOPE NOT. 85 00:03:35,515 --> 00:03:38,717 I-I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT ASKING JULIE. 86 00:03:38,718 --> 00:03:40,419 YOU KNOW, IT'S TIME. 87 00:03:40,420 --> 00:03:42,554 TIME? 88 00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:44,323 WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FIVE YEARS. 89 00:03:45,625 --> 00:03:47,226 WHAT? 90 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:48,760 NO, I'M SORRY. IT JUST-- 91 00:03:48,761 --> 00:03:50,629 NO, IT JUST--IT SOUNDS ODD. 92 00:03:50,630 --> 00:03:52,030 YOU KNOW, I JUST-- 93 00:03:52,031 --> 00:03:53,699 I PICTURE THIS EGG TIMER GOING OFF 94 00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:55,434 WHILE THE TWO OF YOU ARE FOLDING LAUNDRY. 95 00:03:55,435 --> 00:03:57,302 YOU SUDDENLY GETTING ON YOUR KNEE GOING, 96 00:03:57,303 --> 00:03:58,604 "OH, HONEY, IT'S TIME." 97 00:03:58,605 --> 00:04:01,440 WELL, DOESN'T SOUND VERY ROMANTIC WHEN YOU SAY THAT. 98 00:04:01,441 --> 00:04:03,008 OH, YOU KNOW WHAT IS ROMANTIC? 99 00:04:03,009 --> 00:04:05,711 THE BAHAMAS. 100 00:04:05,712 --> 00:04:07,079 IS THAT WHERE YOU AND PAUL WENT? 101 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,213 IT'S WHERE I WENT. 102 00:04:08,214 --> 00:04:10,282 LITTLE BIRTHDAY TREAT FOR MYSELF. 103 00:04:10,283 --> 00:04:12,217 HE DIDN'T WANT TO COME? 104 00:04:12,218 --> 00:04:13,919 WE'RE SEPARATE 105 00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:16,989 SERIOUSLY? 106 00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:21,793 SO FUCKING TYPICAL. 107 00:04:21,794 --> 00:04:24,329 THINGS GET ROUGH, THE GUY BAILS. 108 00:04:24,330 --> 00:04:25,764 HOW CAN HE SLEEP AT NIGHT 109 00:04:25,765 --> 00:04:28,800 KNOWING HE'S LEAVING YOU WHEN YOU'RE GOING THROUGH THIS? 110 00:04:28,801 --> 00:04:30,602 - IT'S COMPLICATED. - NO, IT'S NOT. 111 00:04:30,603 --> 00:04:32,504 LOVING SOMEONE THROUGH SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH? 112 00:04:32,505 --> 00:04:35,674 NOT COMPLICATED. 113 00:04:35,675 --> 00:04:39,112 JULIE'S SO GONNA SAY YES. 114 00:04:44,017 --> 00:04:48,320 IS THERE ANYTHING BETTER THAN CHEWABLE VITAMINS, HMM? 115 00:04:48,321 --> 00:04:50,656 IT'S LIKE THEY TOOK EVERYTHING THAT'S GOOD 116 00:04:50,657 --> 00:04:54,793 IN SUGAR AND FRUIT PUNCH AND CHALK 117 00:04:54,794 --> 00:04:56,261 AND TURNED IT 118 00:04:56,262 --> 00:04:58,764 INTO THESE MIRACLE LITTLE PILLS. 119 00:04:58,765 --> 00:05:02,534 I FOUND THESE ON THE FLOOR AFTER CLASS. 120 00:05:02,535 --> 00:05:06,305 NOW, I AM NO DRUG EXPERT, 121 00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:08,040 BUT I KNOW MY CARTOON PILLS, 122 00:05:08,041 --> 00:05:09,708 AND THESE BABIES LOOK MORE LIKE THEY WOULD 123 00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:11,677 RUIN YOUR COMPLEXION AND COST YOUR PARENTS 124 00:05:11,678 --> 00:05:13,512 A FORTUNE IN BAIL MONEY. 125 00:05:15,181 --> 00:05:17,516 ANYBODY WANT TO CLAIM THESE? 126 00:05:17,517 --> 00:05:20,086 ANYBODY? 127 00:05:21,888 --> 00:05:23,488 ANDREA, DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THESE? 128 00:05:23,489 --> 00:05:25,924 NO, BUT TEXT ME IF YOU FIND MY CRACK PIPE. 129 00:05:25,925 --> 00:05:27,759 I'M JONESING LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER. 130 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:29,528 I'M NOT ACCUSING YOU OF ANYTHING. 131 00:05:29,529 --> 00:05:32,097 THEN WHAT ARE YOU ASKING ME ABOUT DRUGS FOR? 132 00:05:32,098 --> 00:05:34,266 DON'T YOU KNOW THAT RACIAL PROFILING IS RUDE? 133 00:05:34,267 --> 00:05:36,268 I JUST THOUGHT YOU MIGHT HAVE HEARD SOMETHING. 134 00:05:36,269 --> 00:05:38,236 ACTUALLY, I DID HEAR SOMETHING. 135 00:05:38,237 --> 00:05:39,438 REALLY? 136 00:05:39,439 --> 00:05:44,042 I HEARD IT'S NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS. 137 00:05:44,043 --> 00:05:47,312 HEY, ANDREA. 138 00:05:47,313 --> 00:05:50,115 WELL, GOOD MORNING, MS. JAMISON. 139 00:05:50,116 --> 00:05:51,316 GOOD MORNING. 140 00:05:51,317 --> 00:05:54,686 GETTING A LITTLE BOLD, WOULDN'T YOU SAY? 141 00:05:54,687 --> 00:05:56,621 JUST WALTZING INTO MY CLASS IN FRONT A STUDENT 142 00:05:56,622 --> 00:05:58,523 WITH A BRUSH IN YOUR HAND. 143 00:05:58,524 --> 00:06:01,393 WELL, PERHAPS THE BAHAMAS HAS MADE ME BOLD. 144 00:06:03,896 --> 00:06:08,600 WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH ECSTASY ON YOUR DESK? 145 00:06:08,601 --> 00:06:09,935 I WOULDN'T TAKE THESE ALL AT ONCE, 146 00:06:09,936 --> 00:06:11,603 UNLESS YOU WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE 147 00:06:11,604 --> 00:06:13,438 FEELING LIKE YOU'RE LIVING IN A BAD DISNEY MOVIE. 148 00:06:13,439 --> 00:06:14,906 WHAT DOES IT DO? 149 00:06:14,907 --> 00:06:17,609 - YOU'VE NEVER TAKEN "E" BEFORE? - YOU HAVE? 150 00:06:17,610 --> 00:06:20,245 HOW DO YOU THINK I PAINT THOSE MURALS? 151 00:06:21,948 --> 00:06:24,249 WELL, WHAT'S IT LIKE? 152 00:06:24,250 --> 00:06:27,686 WELL, IT MAKES YOU FEEL EUPHORIC, UNINHIBITED. 153 00:06:27,687 --> 00:06:31,089 THEY TAKE THEM AT RAVES, AND PEOPLE DANCE ALL NIGHT. 154 00:06:31,090 --> 00:06:33,458 MAKES YOU ESCAPE REALITY FOR A WHILE. 155 00:06:33,459 --> 00:06:35,827 I WAS ALWAYS TOO AFRAID TO DO DRUGS. 156 00:06:35,828 --> 00:06:37,763 SMOKED A LITTLE POT, CIGARETTES. 157 00:06:37,764 --> 00:06:39,030 YEAH, BUT THE HARD STUFF-- 158 00:06:39,031 --> 00:06:40,732 I GUESS I WAS ALWAYS TOO AFRAID 159 00:06:40,733 --> 00:06:42,334 I'D END UP FEELING LIKE I WAS LIVING 160 00:06:42,335 --> 00:06:44,035 IN A BAD DISNEY MOVIE. 161 00:06:46,472 --> 00:06:49,074 DANG IT. I CAN'T GET IT EVEN. 162 00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:50,308 WELL, GOOD. I DON'T WANT IT TO BE EVEN. 163 00:06:50,309 --> 00:06:52,010 YOU KNOW WHAT'D BE SICK? 164 00:06:52,011 --> 00:06:53,879 IF YOU LET ME SHAVE IT ALL OFF. 165 00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:56,381 AND GIVE UP MY JUST-BEEN-FUCKED LOOK? 166 00:06:56,382 --> 00:06:59,117 JUST TRIM IT AND CUT ANYTHING KNOTTED OR MATTED. 167 00:06:59,118 --> 00:07:00,519 ADAM! 168 00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:01,853 I GOT A MOVIE! 169 00:07:01,854 --> 00:07:03,855 I REALIZED I THINK WE NEED MORE MUSIC IN OUR LIVES, 170 00:07:03,856 --> 00:07:07,459 SO I GOT XANADU. 171 00:07:07,460 --> 00:07:10,095 WHY DOES MY KITCHEN FLOOR LOOK LIKE IT'S GOING THROUGH PUBERTY? 172 00:07:10,096 --> 00:07:11,763 I'M TEACHING YOUR SON TO BARTER, 173 00:07:11,764 --> 00:07:14,099 SO HE'LL UNDERSTAND HOW UTTERLY UNNATURAL IT IS 174 00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:15,300 TO SPEND MONEY. 175 00:07:15,301 --> 00:07:16,902 UNCLE SEAN SAID HE'D LET ME HAVE THIS 176 00:07:16,903 --> 00:07:18,703 IF I CUT HIS HAIR. 177 00:07:18,704 --> 00:07:20,071 LITTLE BLING 178 00:07:20,072 --> 00:07:22,841 FOR THE LITTLE MAN'S BIG NIGHT OUT. 179 00:07:22,842 --> 00:07:24,075 WHAT'S BIG ABOUT TONIGHT? 180 00:07:24,076 --> 00:07:26,111 OH, I'M JUST GOING TO A PARTY WITH BRENT. 181 00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:27,813 WHAT PARTY? 182 00:07:27,814 --> 00:07:29,047 IT'S A MONDAY. 183 00:07:29,048 --> 00:07:30,682 WHO THROWS PARTIES ON A MONDAY? 184 00:07:30,683 --> 00:07:32,083 HMM, IT'S SUMMER. 185 00:07:32,084 --> 00:07:33,418 IS IT A RAVE? 186 00:07:33,419 --> 00:07:35,287 PEOPLE DO WEIRD THINGS AT RAVES. 187 00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:36,822 NO, THERE ARE GONNA BE ADULTS, MOM. 188 00:07:36,823 --> 00:07:38,457 IT'S A BIRTHDAY PARTY FOR BRENT'S COUSIN, 189 00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:40,358 I'LL CRASH AT BRENT'S HOUSE. 190 00:07:40,359 --> 00:07:42,093 OH, AND LOOK... 191 00:07:42,094 --> 00:07:44,262 OFF YOUR LIST OF THREE SURVIVAL MEALS 192 00:07:44,263 --> 00:07:45,897 I HAVE TO MAKE BEFORE SUMMER'S OUT 193 00:07:45,898 --> 00:07:47,933 AND ONE ROMANTIC DESSERT, 194 00:07:47,934 --> 00:07:51,804 I GIVE YOU CHOCOLATE MOUSSE. 195 00:07:53,940 --> 00:07:56,275 MADAME. 196 00:08:04,383 --> 00:08:06,084 YOU CAN GO. 197 00:08:06,085 --> 00:08:07,352 YES! 198 00:08:11,257 --> 00:08:12,724 - OW! - YOU'RE DONE. 199 00:08:12,725 --> 00:08:14,993 SORRY TO BARGE IN ON YOU, 200 00:08:14,994 --> 00:08:16,595 BUT MY FREEZER'S ON THE BLINK AGAIN, 201 00:08:16,596 --> 00:08:20,298 AND WITHOUT MY COLD FRESCA, I CAN'T EAT MY DINNER. 202 00:08:20,299 --> 00:08:22,567 EDDIE ALWAYS FIXED THESE THINGS. 203 00:08:22,568 --> 00:08:24,236 THINK I COULD BORROW SOME ICE CUBES? 204 00:08:24,237 --> 00:08:26,037 SURE, MARLENE. 205 00:08:26,038 --> 00:08:27,239 HEY, MARLENE, HOW OLD ARE YOU? 206 00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:28,640 SEAN. 207 00:08:28,641 --> 00:08:31,209 79 AND COUNTING. WHY? 208 00:08:31,210 --> 00:08:32,711 I GOT A BUDDY OF MINE AROUND YOUR AGE 209 00:08:32,712 --> 00:08:33,979 I THINK YOU MIGHT LIKE. 210 00:08:33,980 --> 00:08:36,648 YOU TRYING TO FIX ME UP? 211 00:08:36,649 --> 00:08:38,583 WELL, I-I-I COULD CHAPERONE IF YOU LIKE. 212 00:08:38,584 --> 00:08:40,218 I THINK YOU AND EARL MIGHT JUST HIT IT OFF. 213 00:08:40,219 --> 00:08:41,286 WHY? 214 00:08:41,287 --> 00:08:43,855 DO YOU THINK ALL OLD PEOPLE ARE SOUL MATES? 215 00:08:43,856 --> 00:08:45,957 HEY, IF YOU WANT TO SIT AROUND MAKING ICE CUBES, 216 00:08:45,958 --> 00:08:47,158 BE MY GUEST. 217 00:08:47,159 --> 00:08:49,127 BE 79 YEARS OLD AND PICKY. 218 00:08:49,128 --> 00:08:50,729 GOOD LUCK WITH THAT. 219 00:08:50,730 --> 00:08:52,531 FINE. SET ME UP, CUPID. 220 00:08:54,734 --> 00:08:57,002 OH, I GOT TO TAKE THIS. EXCUSE ME. 221 00:08:57,003 --> 00:08:59,672 HEY. 222 00:09:01,774 --> 00:09:04,076 WAIT, ONE SECOND. 223 00:09:06,345 --> 00:09:07,512 HI. 224 00:09:07,513 --> 00:09:08,914 HI. IT'S, UH, DR. MAUER. 225 00:09:08,915 --> 00:09:10,282 NO, I KNOW. 226 00:09:10,283 --> 00:09:12,183 I HAVE YOU UNDER "CAPITAL 'C'." 227 00:09:12,184 --> 00:09:14,419 OH, THAT'S DEPRESSING. 228 00:09:14,420 --> 00:09:17,422 UM, LOOK, I'M JUST GONNA RIP THE BAND-AID OFF HERE. 229 00:09:17,423 --> 00:09:20,091 THE CLINICAL TRIAL IS ONLY ACCEPTING PATIENTS 230 00:09:20,092 --> 00:09:22,727 WHO HAVE HAD PRIOR TREATMENT. 231 00:09:22,728 --> 00:09:24,429 I WAS TRYING TO GET INTO THIS TRIAL 232 00:09:24,430 --> 00:09:25,931 TO GET TREATMENT. 233 00:09:25,932 --> 00:09:30,535 SO IT TURNS OUT I HAVE TO HAVE HAD TREATMENT TO GET TREATMENT? 234 00:09:30,536 --> 00:09:33,171 THAT'S A REAL CANCER-22. 235 00:09:33,172 --> 00:09:34,906 WELL, LOOK, EVERY CLINICAL TRIAL'S DIFFERENT. 236 00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:37,609 WE'LL, UM--WE'LL TRY FOR THE NEXT ONE. 237 00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:40,312 YOU DO THAT. 238 00:09:40,313 --> 00:09:43,648 GO READ AN X-RAY. 239 00:10:05,404 --> 00:10:07,540 I NEED AN ESCAPE. 240 00:10:11,711 --> 00:10:13,411 SO WHEN AM I GONNA FEEL IT? 241 00:10:13,412 --> 00:10:15,113 ANY MINUTE NOW. 242 00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:16,715 THERE'S NOTHING TO BE NERVOUS ABOUT. 243 00:10:16,716 --> 00:10:19,451 EXCEPT ACCORDING TO THE INTERNET, THERE IS. 244 00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:21,386 UH, I MEAN, I'M REALLY GLAD THAT WE'RE DOING THIS, 245 00:10:21,387 --> 00:10:23,855 BUT APPARENTLY ALL THAT RAVE DANCING IS LIFE-THREATENING. 246 00:10:25,124 --> 00:10:26,958 NO, WE COULD GET HYPOTHERMIA. 247 00:10:26,959 --> 00:10:30,061 OUR ORGANS COULD SLOWLY BAKE INSIDE OF US 248 00:10:30,062 --> 00:10:31,129 TILL THEY SHUT DOWN. 249 00:10:31,130 --> 00:10:32,330 YOU'RE BEING PARANOID. 250 00:10:32,331 --> 00:10:34,332 THE INTERNET SAID THAT WOULD HAPPEN TOO. 251 00:10:34,333 --> 00:10:38,036 JUST--JUST DON'T PLAY ANY MUSIC I CAN DANCE TO, 252 00:10:38,037 --> 00:10:39,371 ESPECIALLY ABBA. 253 00:10:40,539 --> 00:10:41,873 NO, HONESTLY, DO NOT-- 254 00:10:41,874 --> 00:10:43,875 DO NOT PLAY ABBA. - OKAY. 255 00:10:43,876 --> 00:10:45,443 IT WOULD-- 256 00:10:45,444 --> 00:10:49,047 THAT WOULD LITERALLY GIVE ME KIDNEY FAILURE. 257 00:10:49,048 --> 00:10:52,283 YOU'LL--YOU'LL BE SAFE, ALL RIGHT? 258 00:10:52,284 --> 00:10:54,686 I PROMISE IT. 259 00:10:54,687 --> 00:10:56,621 MAYBE IF THE INTERNET HAD AN ENGLISH ACCENT, 260 00:10:56,622 --> 00:10:58,690 IT WOULDN'T SOUND AS SCARY AS IT DOES. 261 00:11:03,596 --> 00:11:04,796 HEY, TREVOR, THANKS FOR TAKING US. 262 00:11:04,797 --> 00:11:06,831 I MEAN, MY MOM WOULD CHOKE ON HER TONGUE 263 00:11:06,832 --> 00:11:08,366 IF SHE KNEW THERE WERE NO PARENTS HERE. 264 00:11:08,367 --> 00:11:09,834 DON'T THANK MY DICKHEAD BROTHER. 265 00:11:09,835 --> 00:11:11,970 I'M WASHING HIS CAR FOR A MONTH FOR DRIVING US. 266 00:11:11,971 --> 00:11:13,338 YEAH, INCLUDING THE RIMS. 267 00:11:13,339 --> 00:11:15,140 LATER, LADIES. 268 00:11:15,141 --> 00:11:16,241 EW. 269 00:11:16,242 --> 00:11:18,176 WHO THE FUCK LET IN A COUPLE OF FRESHMEN? 270 00:11:18,177 --> 00:11:21,479 HEY, ANDREA. WHAT'S UP? 271 00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:23,048 COOL PARTY, HUH? 272 00:11:23,049 --> 00:11:24,983 YEAH, IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR THE BOUNCY CASTLE, 273 00:11:24,984 --> 00:11:26,284 THERE ISN'T ONE. 274 00:11:26,285 --> 00:11:27,285 SHUT UP. 275 00:11:27,286 --> 00:11:28,720 YOU'RE ONLY TWO YEARS OLDER THAN ME. 276 00:11:28,721 --> 00:11:30,221 WHICH I WHY I WAS INVITED. 277 00:11:30,222 --> 00:11:31,556 COME ON. 278 00:11:31,557 --> 00:11:33,925 I'LL SHOW YOU WHERE ALL THE DRINKS ARE. 279 00:11:33,926 --> 00:11:35,560 MAYBE WE CAN FIND A SIPPY CUP. 280 00:11:35,561 --> 00:11:37,562 WHERE DO YOU THINK WE GO? 281 00:11:37,563 --> 00:11:39,364 I MEAN, WHEN WE GO, LENNY, 282 00:11:39,365 --> 00:11:41,132 WHERE DO YOU THINK WE GO? 283 00:11:41,133 --> 00:11:42,967 I MEAN, I THINK THAT THE ENERGY 284 00:11:42,968 --> 00:11:45,537 JUST STAYS IN THE EARTH, IN THE AIR. 285 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:48,506 ENERGY-- IT CAN'T BE DESTROYED, 286 00:11:48,507 --> 00:11:53,412 SO I THINK WE BECOME A PART OF EVERYTHING. 287 00:11:55,648 --> 00:11:58,483 I THINK YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. 288 00:11:58,484 --> 00:12:00,085 WE BECOME A PART OF EVERYTHING. 289 00:12:00,086 --> 00:12:01,720 WE'RE EVERYWHERE. - RIGHT. 290 00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:03,221 I'VE WRESTLED WITH THIS QUESTION, 291 00:12:03,222 --> 00:12:04,723 BUT, GOD, THE-- 292 00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:05,990 GOD, THE ANSWER IS SO OBVIOUS. 293 00:12:05,991 --> 00:12:07,559 OH. 294 00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:10,328 YOU'RE SO BEAUTIFUL. 295 00:12:10,329 --> 00:12:11,629 I'M NOT AFRAID ANYMORE. 296 00:12:11,630 --> 00:12:13,131 WHAT AREN'T YOU AFRAID OF? 297 00:12:13,132 --> 00:12:15,800 ANYTHING. 298 00:12:15,801 --> 00:12:18,236 DEATH... 299 00:12:18,237 --> 00:12:19,738 SHARKS... 300 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:20,905 ANYTHING. 301 00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:24,042 YEAH, WHAT ABOUT BIG CATS, LIKE--LIKE LIONS? 302 00:12:24,043 --> 00:12:25,510 - NOPE. - NOPE? 303 00:12:29,014 --> 00:12:31,683 I'M HOT. 304 00:12:31,684 --> 00:12:32,784 ARE YOU HOT? 305 00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:42,193 CATHY? 306 00:12:42,194 --> 00:12:43,661 IT'S PAUL! GOT MY SUIT! 307 00:12:43,662 --> 00:12:45,230 FORGOT MY TIE! 308 00:12:45,231 --> 00:12:47,866 MAYBE I'LL GET THE ONE YOU GAVE ME 309 00:12:47,867 --> 00:12:49,901 FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY! 310 00:12:49,902 --> 00:12:54,039 EH, MAYBE I'LL SHRED THAT ONE AND GET ANOTHER ONE. 311 00:13:17,830 --> 00:13:19,898 EVERYTHING LOOKS SO GOOD. 312 00:13:19,899 --> 00:13:21,599 I'D GO FOR THE CORN ON THE COB, 313 00:13:21,600 --> 00:13:23,334 BUT I DIDN'T BRING MY GOOD TEETH. 314 00:13:23,335 --> 00:13:25,870 AND IF I'D KNOWN THEY WERE GONNA BRING US ALL THIS BREAD, 315 00:13:25,871 --> 00:13:27,605 I WOULD HAVE BROUGHT MY BIG PURSE. 316 00:13:27,606 --> 00:13:28,940 THIS IS GOOD. 317 00:13:28,941 --> 00:13:31,810 I HAD A FEELING YOU GUYS HAD THE SAME SENSIBILITIES. 318 00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:36,014 YOU KNOW WHAT I'D REALLY LIKE TO EAT? 319 00:13:36,015 --> 00:13:39,517 YOU. 320 00:13:39,518 --> 00:13:42,487 UH, EASY THERE, EARL. 321 00:13:42,488 --> 00:13:44,722 START SLOW. 322 00:13:44,723 --> 00:13:46,157 I APOLOGIZE, MARLENE. 323 00:13:46,158 --> 00:13:47,659 APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT? 324 00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:49,494 HEY, I MAY BE 82 YEARS OLD, 325 00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:54,165 BUT I GOT A TONGUE THAT CAN LICK THE PAINT OFF AN OUTHOUSE. 326 00:13:59,605 --> 00:14:00,805 SORRY, EVERYONE. 327 00:14:00,806 --> 00:14:04,042 I WAS DETAINED AT THE BAR BY A LOVELY BARTENDER 328 00:14:04,043 --> 00:14:07,846 WHO UNDERSTANDS THE DEFINITION OF THE "GENEROUS POUR." 329 00:14:09,181 --> 00:14:10,415 WHERE'S CATHY? 330 00:14:10,416 --> 00:14:12,483 OH, SHE COULDN'T MAKE IT. 331 00:14:12,484 --> 00:14:15,286 I JUST FOUND OUT THAT SHE HAD A PREVIOUS COMMITMENT. 332 00:14:15,287 --> 00:14:16,588 I'M SO SORRY. 333 00:14:16,589 --> 00:14:18,223 OH, I'M SO SORRY SHE CAN'T JOIN US, 334 00:14:18,224 --> 00:14:20,959 BUT WE'LL TRY NOT TO LET IT DAMPEN OUR CELEBRATION. 335 00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:22,293 NOW, UH... 336 00:14:22,294 --> 00:14:23,661 PAUL, NICK, 337 00:14:23,662 --> 00:14:25,930 I AM SO THRILLED TO HAVE YOU 338 00:14:25,931 --> 00:14:29,300 AS MY NEW VICE PRESIDENTS OF CREATIVE SERVICES. 339 00:14:29,301 --> 00:14:31,069 CONGRATULATIONS. - CONGRATULATIONS. 340 00:14:31,070 --> 00:14:33,005 WELL DONE. 341 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:42,747 AHH! 342 00:14:42,748 --> 00:14:44,616 WHERE'S THE DUDE? 343 00:14:44,617 --> 00:14:48,286 DUDE? 344 00:14:48,287 --> 00:14:52,357 I'M SO LUCKY TO KNOW YOU, 345 00:14:52,358 --> 00:14:54,425 AND I'M SO LUCKY TO HAVE MET YOU. 346 00:14:56,929 --> 00:15:00,031 I FEEL REALLY LUCKY, 347 00:15:00,032 --> 00:15:02,300 AND I'M BEGINNING TO FEEL FOR THE FIRST TIME, 348 00:15:02,301 --> 00:15:04,469 FINALLY, THAT EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE ALL RIGHT. 349 00:15:04,470 --> 00:15:06,738 IT IS GONNA BE ALL RIGHT. 350 00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:09,274 MAYBE I DON'T HAVE TO-- 351 00:15:09,275 --> 00:15:11,342 I DON'T HAVE TO WORK SO HARD. 352 00:15:11,343 --> 00:15:13,778 I DON'T HAVE TO WORRY SO MUCH. I DON'T EVEN HAVE TO RAISE ADAM. 353 00:15:13,779 --> 00:15:16,881 HE WILL BE RAISED... BY THE WORLD. 354 00:15:16,882 --> 00:15:18,716 HE'LL BE OKAY WITH THE REST OF IT. 355 00:15:18,717 --> 00:15:22,287 AND IT'S NOT EVEN-- IT'S NOT EVEN WHAT I SAY, IS IT? 356 00:15:22,288 --> 00:15:23,521 I-I-I JUST-- 357 00:15:23,522 --> 00:15:25,590 I SHOULD QUIT TALKING TO ADAM ALTOGETHER. 358 00:15:25,591 --> 00:15:28,993 I SHOULD EXIST AROUND HIM, 359 00:15:28,994 --> 00:15:33,131 SO HE KNOWS THAT I'M THERE, BUT... 360 00:15:33,132 --> 00:15:39,037 NO WORDS. 361 00:15:39,038 --> 00:15:42,140 HMM. 362 00:15:42,141 --> 00:15:44,509 YOU WANT TO SEE MY POOL HOLE? 363 00:15:47,313 --> 00:15:50,815 I HAVE AN AWESOME POOL HOLE. 364 00:15:53,018 --> 00:15:55,119 HMM? 365 00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:56,988 EARL, WHY DON'T YOU TELL MARLENE 366 00:15:56,989 --> 00:15:58,656 A LITTLE BIT ABOUT YOURSELF? 367 00:15:58,657 --> 00:16:00,024 ALL RIGHT. 368 00:16:00,025 --> 00:16:02,593 LOOK, MARLENE, I COULD TELL YOU I MOVED HERE FROM BROOKLYN, 369 00:16:02,594 --> 00:16:05,029 SERVED IN KOREA, THREE BROTHERS, 370 00:16:05,030 --> 00:16:07,332 BUT THE ONLY THING YOU REALLY HAVE TO KNOW ABOUT ME 371 00:16:07,333 --> 00:16:08,366 IS IN MY PANTS. 372 00:16:08,367 --> 00:16:09,767 OH, MY GOD. 373 00:16:09,768 --> 00:16:11,602 IS THAT SO? 374 00:16:11,603 --> 00:16:14,305 I'VE GOT THE BIGGEST PAIR OF NUTS YOU'VE EVER SEEN. 375 00:16:14,306 --> 00:16:15,807 JESUS, EARL! 376 00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:17,742 THIS IS NOT POLITE DINNER CONVERSATION. 377 00:16:17,743 --> 00:16:20,912 IT'S NOT EVEN BACHELOR-PARTY CONVERSATION. 378 00:16:20,913 --> 00:16:22,647 AND MY DICK AIN'T BAD EITHER, 379 00:16:22,648 --> 00:16:26,150 THOUGH IT LOOKS SMALLER AGAINST MY BALLS THAN IT REALLY IS-- 380 00:16:26,151 --> 00:16:27,518 OPTICAL ILLUSION. 381 00:16:27,519 --> 00:16:28,953 OH! 382 00:16:28,954 --> 00:16:30,154 JEEZ. 383 00:16:30,155 --> 00:16:32,256 ULD YOU GET THAT FOR ME, PLEASE, MARLENE? 384 00:16:32,257 --> 00:16:36,361 I GOT IT. I GOT IT. 385 00:16:36,362 --> 00:16:38,429 JESUS CHRIST, EARL! 386 00:16:38,430 --> 00:16:39,897 IT WASN'T MEANT FOR YOU. 387 00:16:39,898 --> 00:16:41,265 IT WAS MEANT FOR HER. 388 00:16:41,266 --> 00:16:43,434 SEAN, COULD I SPEAK TO YOU ALONE? 389 00:16:43,435 --> 00:16:45,137 WHAT? 390 00:16:48,307 --> 00:16:50,041 EXCUSE ME. 391 00:16:50,042 --> 00:16:52,577 UM, IT'S OKAY, LADIES. 392 00:16:52,578 --> 00:16:54,178 I'M TRANSGENDER. 393 00:16:54,179 --> 00:16:55,847 HE'S A HORRIBLE DOCTOR. 394 00:16:55,848 --> 00:16:58,316 DON'T ASK FOR HIS NUMBER. 395 00:16:58,317 --> 00:16:59,884 I-I'M SO SORRY, MARLENE. 396 00:16:59,885 --> 00:17:01,552 I-I-I'VE KNOWN EARL FOR A WHILE, 397 00:17:01,553 --> 00:17:02,954 BUT I GUESS I'VE NEVER REALLY BEEN 398 00:17:02,955 --> 00:17:04,889 IN A SOCIAL SITUATION WITH HIM. 399 00:17:04,890 --> 00:17:06,424 STOP GETTING IN THE WAY. 400 00:17:06,425 --> 00:17:08,393 - I-I'M SORRY? - YOU HEARD ME. 401 00:17:08,394 --> 00:17:10,728 I'M AN OLD WOMAN WHO DOESN'T GET A LOT 402 00:17:10,729 --> 00:17:12,196 OF OPPORTUNITIES WITH MEN, 403 00:17:12,197 --> 00:17:15,466 ESPECIALLY ONE SO CLEARLY READY FOR RELATIONS. 404 00:17:15,467 --> 00:17:17,368 I DIDN'T AGREE TO COME TONIGHT 405 00:17:17,369 --> 00:17:20,138 BECAUSE I'M LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO GROW OLD WITH. 406 00:17:20,139 --> 00:17:24,742 I'M ALREADY OLD, AND OLD PEOPLE GET HORNY TOO, 407 00:17:24,743 --> 00:17:28,347 SO QUIT COCK-BLOCKING ME. 408 00:17:32,151 --> 00:17:34,152 DUDE, CHECK OUT THIS STATUE. 409 00:17:34,153 --> 00:17:35,720 YEAH. 410 00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:37,922 SHE'S GOT SOME LONG-ASS TITTIES. 411 00:17:37,923 --> 00:17:39,457 LOOKS LIKE A COUPLE OF TORPEDOES 412 00:17:39,458 --> 00:17:41,492 FLEW IN HER BACK AND GOT CAUGHT IN HER CHEST. 413 00:17:41,493 --> 00:17:44,328 SHE COULD USE THOSE AS NUNCHUCKS. 414 00:17:46,932 --> 00:17:48,332 DUDE, THERE'S THIS GIRL UPSTAIRS, 415 00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:49,534 AND SHE'S REALLY DRUNK, AND SHE'S FUCKING 416 00:17:49,535 --> 00:17:50,968 ANY GUY WHO WANTS TO GET LAID. 417 00:17:50,969 --> 00:17:52,270 THAT'S PATHETIC. 418 00:17:52,271 --> 00:17:53,838 MEGAN NEEDS A VIRGIN. 419 00:17:53,839 --> 00:17:55,606 SERIOUSLY? 420 00:17:55,607 --> 00:17:57,875 WHO WANTS TO POP THEIR CHERRY? 421 00:17:57,876 --> 00:17:59,811 WHO THE FUCK IN HERE'S A LAME-ASS VIRGIN? 422 00:17:59,812 --> 00:18:02,380 OH, ADAM. 423 00:18:02,381 --> 00:18:04,148 NO, THANKS, DUDE. I'M GOOD. 424 00:18:04,149 --> 00:18:06,084 WHAT ARE YOU, A PUSSY? 425 00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:08,820 VIRGIN... 426 00:18:08,821 --> 00:18:09,954 VIRGIN. 427 00:18:09,955 --> 00:18:11,055 VIRGIN! 428 00:18:11,056 --> 00:18:14,292 all: VIRGIN! VIRGIN! VIRGIN! 429 00:18:14,293 --> 00:18:16,828 VIRGIN! VIRGIN! 430 00:18:16,829 --> 00:18:17,862 HE'S NOT A VIRGIN. 431 00:18:17,863 --> 00:18:19,297 HOW WOULD YOU KNOW? 432 00:18:19,298 --> 00:18:21,499 - TRUST ME. - HOLY SHIT. 433 00:18:21,500 --> 00:18:23,968 YOU SLEPT WITH THIS COW? 434 00:18:23,969 --> 00:18:26,104 WHAT? NO. NO WAY. 435 00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:30,476 FUCK YOU. 436 00:18:33,412 --> 00:18:35,446 DON'T MIND IF I DO. 437 00:18:38,417 --> 00:18:40,418 SO, NICK, I HEARD THAT YOU AND ANDY 438 00:18:40,419 --> 00:18:42,120 GOT A NEW PLACE IN ST. PAUL. 439 00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:44,188 WE DID. WE BOUGHT A LOFT IN THE LOWRY BUILDING. 440 00:18:44,189 --> 00:18:45,156 NICE. 441 00:18:45,157 --> 00:18:46,757 BUT THAT'S NOT OUR BIGGEST NEWS. 442 00:18:46,758 --> 00:18:49,327 UM, TONIGHT'S KIND OF A DOUBLE CELEBRATION 443 00:18:49,328 --> 00:18:50,495 FOR ANDY AND ME. 444 00:18:50,496 --> 00:18:53,297 OF--OF COURSE, THERE'S OUR PROMOTION... 445 00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:57,401 BUT, UH, LAST WEEK, ANDY AND I GOT MARRIED. 446 00:18:57,402 --> 00:19:00,071 YEAH, WE DROVE DOWN TO MASON CITY, IOWA, 447 00:19:00,072 --> 00:19:01,506 AND WE TIED THE OLD RAINBOW KNOT. 448 00:19:01,507 --> 00:19:03,274 WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THERE'D BE A SHINING EXAMPLE 449 00:19:03,275 --> 00:19:05,610 OF TOLERANCE, LIKE, JUST 200 MILES AWAY? 450 00:19:05,611 --> 00:19:07,578 THAT'S GREAT. 451 00:19:07,579 --> 00:19:09,715 - THAT'S TERRIFIC. - THANK YOU. 452 00:19:11,583 --> 00:19:13,551 YOU KNOW WHAT I DON'T GET ABOUT GAY MARRIAGE? 453 00:19:13,552 --> 00:19:15,019 TWO THINGS. 454 00:19:15,020 --> 00:19:16,821 FIRST OF ALL, ASS SEX. 455 00:19:16,822 --> 00:19:20,291 SUPPORT IT, SUPPORT IT. DON'T GET IT. 456 00:19:20,292 --> 00:19:22,493 BUT WHAT I REALLY DON'T UNDERSTAND IS... 457 00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:25,263 WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED IN THE FIRST PLACE? 458 00:19:25,264 --> 00:19:28,366 WELL, TO ENJOY THE SAME RIGHTS AND PRIVILEGES 459 00:19:28,367 --> 00:19:29,934 AS ALL THE-- - AND PAIN AND HEARTACHE. 460 00:19:29,935 --> 00:19:32,270 SAY YOU'RE JUST LIVING TOGETHER, AND THINGS GO SOUTH. 461 00:19:32,271 --> 00:19:34,472 YOU WAKE UP ONE DAY, AND YOU GO, 462 00:19:34,473 --> 00:19:36,641 "YOU KNOW, THIS GUY'S HAD BAD BREATH ALL THE TIME, 463 00:19:36,642 --> 00:19:38,743 "BUT TODAY HIS BREATH IS SO BAD, 464 00:19:38,744 --> 00:19:40,878 I'M GONNA END THE RELATIONSHIP." YOU JUST WALK. 465 00:19:40,879 --> 00:19:43,781 YOU KNOW, BUT IF YOU COMMITTED A LIFETIME TO EACH OTHER 466 00:19:43,782 --> 00:19:45,550 AND SOMEBODY WALKS, 467 00:19:45,551 --> 00:19:48,486 IT'S LIKE OPEN-FUCKING-HEART SURGERY 468 00:19:48,487 --> 00:19:49,687 WITHOUT THE ANESTHESIA. 469 00:19:49,688 --> 00:19:50,888 PAUL, YOU'RE DRUNK. 470 00:19:50,889 --> 00:19:52,890 NICK, DING, DING, DING, DING. 471 00:19:52,891 --> 00:19:54,325 YOU'RE RIGHT. 472 00:19:54,326 --> 00:19:57,295 BUT THIS I KNOW. I KNOW THIS. 473 00:19:57,296 --> 00:19:59,564 MARRIAGE IS A SUFFOCATING DEATH TRAP, 474 00:19:59,565 --> 00:20:01,365 AND MONOGAMY IS A FUCKING MYTH. 475 00:20:01,366 --> 00:20:02,733 YOU KNOW WHAT MARRIAGE NEEDS? 476 00:20:02,734 --> 00:20:04,068 TO BE PUNCHED IN THE BALLS. 477 00:20:04,069 --> 00:20:05,836 THAT'S WHAT MARRIAGE NEEDS-- SWIFT KICK IN THE NUTS. 478 00:20:05,837 --> 00:20:07,371 OKAY, PAUL, THAT'S ENOUGH. 479 00:20:07,372 --> 00:20:09,407 OBVIOUSLY, YOU AND CATHY HAVE SOME PERSONAL ISSUES. 480 00:20:09,408 --> 00:20:11,943 FUCK YOU, SIMON. YOU TELL ME THAT'S ENOUGH 481 00:20:11,944 --> 00:20:15,514 WHEN YOU FIND YOUR WIFE FUCKING A BLACK GUY. 482 00:20:20,085 --> 00:20:23,187 FYI--IF YOU DO EVER DECIDE TO DO THAT, DANIELLE, 483 00:20:23,188 --> 00:20:24,956 PLEASE HAVE THE COURTESY TO NOT DO IT 484 00:20:24,957 --> 00:20:28,393 IN YOUR OWN FUCKING BACKYARD. 485 00:20:41,607 --> 00:20:43,174 WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT? 486 00:20:43,175 --> 00:20:44,709 THEY WERE JUST JOKING. 487 00:20:44,710 --> 00:20:47,078 AND WHAT'S YOUR EXCUSE, ASSHOLE? 488 00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:48,679 WELL, THEY THOUGHT WE WERE TOGETHER OR SOMETHING. 489 00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:49,947 SO WHAT? 490 00:20:49,948 --> 00:20:52,516 I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOUR SCRAWNY VIRGIN ASS? 491 00:20:52,517 --> 00:20:53,684 THAT'S FUCKED UP. 492 00:20:53,685 --> 00:20:55,586 JESUS! CHILL OUT. 493 00:20:55,587 --> 00:20:56,954 YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK YOU, ADAM. 494 00:20:56,955 --> 00:21:00,359 FUCK YOU AND YOUR WHOLE FUCKED-UP FAMILY. 495 00:21:44,036 --> 00:21:45,970 THANKS FOR COMING TO GET ME. 496 00:21:45,971 --> 00:21:48,806 IT'S CRAZY IN THERE. SORRY. 497 00:21:48,807 --> 00:21:50,808 SO WAIT. SO I GUESS I'M IN TROUBLE NOW? 498 00:21:50,809 --> 00:21:53,010 YOU DID THE RIGHT THING. 499 00:21:53,011 --> 00:21:55,780 THOSE KIDS ARE PLASTERED. 500 00:21:55,781 --> 00:21:58,215 OKAY, LET'S GET GOING. 501 00:21:58,216 --> 00:22:01,619 WAIT, SO MY PUNISHMENT IS DRIVING MYSELF HOME? 502 00:22:01,620 --> 00:22:04,055 LOOK, IT'S NOT GREAT THAT I DROVE OVER HERE 503 00:22:04,056 --> 00:22:07,058 AFTER HAVING A 30-YEAR-OLD SCOTCH. 504 00:22:07,059 --> 00:22:10,227 ACTUALLY, I HAD FIVE OF THEM, 505 00:22:10,228 --> 00:22:12,863 SO THAT'S, LIKE, 150 YEARS OF DRINKS. 506 00:22:12,864 --> 00:22:14,665 AND I DON'T WANT TO ENDANGER YOUR LIFE, 507 00:22:14,666 --> 00:22:16,100 SO YOU DRIVE, BUDDY. 508 00:22:16,101 --> 00:22:18,436 I DON'T WANT TO ENDANGER YOUR LIFE. 509 00:22:18,437 --> 00:22:20,438 JUST DON'T GO OVER 15 MILES PER HOUR. 510 00:22:20,439 --> 00:22:23,607 DON'T MAKE ANY LEFT TURNS, AND STOP AT ANYTHING RED. 511 00:22:23,608 --> 00:22:25,776 IT'S OKAY, BUDDY. I'M RIGHT HERE. 512 00:22:25,777 --> 00:22:28,947 COME ON, LET'S GO. 513 00:22:52,104 --> 00:22:54,672 OH, MY GOD. OH, MY GOD. OH, MY GOD. 514 00:22:54,673 --> 00:22:55,673 WHAT'S WRONG? 515 00:22:55,674 --> 00:22:57,108 ADAM CALLED ME. 516 00:22:57,109 --> 00:22:58,642 HE NEVER CALLS ME. 517 00:22:58,643 --> 00:23:00,911 HE CERTAINLY DOESN'T CALL ME 11 TIMES. 518 00:23:00,912 --> 00:23:02,179 OH. 519 00:23:02,180 --> 00:23:04,348 OH, HE NEEDS A RIDE. CRAP! 520 00:23:04,349 --> 00:23:06,217 OKAY, DON'T PANIC. DON'T PANIC. 521 00:23:06,218 --> 00:23:07,785 SOMETHING'S WRONG. 522 00:23:07,786 --> 00:23:09,053 I CAN FEEL IT. 523 00:23:09,054 --> 00:23:11,489 UM, DO YOU WANT ME TO COME WITH YOU? 524 00:23:11,490 --> 00:23:13,090 WHAT? 525 00:23:13,091 --> 00:23:15,025 TO PICK UP MY SON? NO. 526 00:23:15,026 --> 00:23:16,260 RIGHT. NO, I JUST WANT TO HELP. 527 00:23:16,261 --> 00:23:17,561 HOW CAN I HELP? - YOU CAN'T. 528 00:23:17,562 --> 00:23:18,796 YOU DON'T. 529 00:23:18,797 --> 00:23:20,498 GOT YA. 530 00:23:20,499 --> 00:23:24,435 LOOK, YOU'RE NOT A PARENT. 531 00:23:24,436 --> 00:23:28,773 LOOK, LENNY, I-I LIKE YOU, AND I LOVE HOW YOU MAKE ME FEEL, 532 00:23:28,774 --> 00:23:32,209 BUT... I CAN'T DO THIS. 533 00:23:32,210 --> 00:23:35,713 I'M A MOM, AND I NEED TO ACT LIKE ONE. 534 00:23:37,716 --> 00:23:41,519 I CAN'T DO THIS. 535 00:23:52,030 --> 00:23:55,167 CATHY, IT'S NOT ADAM. IT'S PAUL. 536 00:24:02,007 --> 00:24:05,209 PAUL? 537 00:24:05,210 --> 00:24:06,777 HE'S GONNA BE FINE. 538 00:24:06,778 --> 00:24:09,013 HE HAS SEVEN STITCHES, BUT HE'S GONNA BE FINE. 539 00:24:09,014 --> 00:24:10,815 A TREE, PAUL? 540 00:24:10,816 --> 00:24:12,616 TELL ME YOU DIDN'T GET DRUNK AT DINNER. 541 00:24:12,617 --> 00:24:14,952 OH, I HAD A LITTLE BIT TOO MUCH AT DINNER, YEP. 542 00:24:14,953 --> 00:24:17,054 GOD, PAUL. 543 00:24:17,055 --> 00:24:21,392 THAT'S WHY I LET ADAM DRIVE. 544 00:24:21,393 --> 00:24:24,528 YOU DID WHAT? 545 00:24:24,529 --> 00:24:25,663 ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? 546 00:24:25,664 --> 00:24:28,265 HOW COULD YOU DO THAT? 547 00:24:28,266 --> 00:24:30,134 WELL, YOU TAUGHT HIM TO DRIVE, DIDN'T YOU? 548 00:24:30,135 --> 00:24:32,670 NOT ALLOWING HIM TO DRIVE! 549 00:24:32,671 --> 00:24:34,038 OH. 550 00:24:34,039 --> 00:24:35,739 WHERE WERE YOU, HONEY? 551 00:24:35,740 --> 00:24:37,041 HE TRIED TO CALL YOU. 552 00:24:37,042 --> 00:24:39,877 I COULDN'T HEAR THE PHONE. 553 00:24:39,878 --> 00:24:41,746 YEAH. 554 00:24:44,182 --> 00:24:47,184 IS THAT BECAUSE IT WAS UP YOUR VAGINA? 555 00:24:47,185 --> 00:24:49,019 OH, SORRY. 556 00:24:49,020 --> 00:24:51,823 THAT WAS THE BIG BLACK GUY'S PENIS. 557 00:24:54,493 --> 00:24:56,795 I SAW YOU... 558 00:25:00,098 --> 00:25:02,667 IN OUR OWN FUCKING HOUSE! 559 00:25:19,584 --> 00:25:22,386 I'M SORRY. 560 00:25:22,387 --> 00:25:24,823 I'M SO SORRY, MOM. 561 00:25:30,028 --> 00:25:32,763 ME TOO. 562 00:25:32,764 --> 00:25:35,766 JAMISON... 563 00:25:35,767 --> 00:25:37,801 PAUL JAMISON. 564 00:25:37,802 --> 00:25:41,839 MR. JAMISON? 565 00:25:41,840 --> 00:25:43,741 DR. MAUER... 566 00:25:43,742 --> 00:25:47,011 CATHY'S DOCTOR. 567 00:25:47,012 --> 00:25:48,913 SHE CALLED ME AND TOLD ME WHAT HAPPENED. 568 00:25:48,914 --> 00:25:50,347 UM, I JUST WANT TO ASSURE YOU 569 00:25:50,348 --> 00:25:51,849 THAT THE STAFF DOWN HERE IS EXCELLENT. 570 00:25:51,850 --> 00:25:53,083 THEY'LL TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR SON. 571 00:25:53,084 --> 00:25:56,954 THANK YOU. THANKS. 572 00:25:56,955 --> 00:25:58,822 MR. JAMISON, AS A MAN, I GOT TO SAY 573 00:25:58,823 --> 00:26:02,126 I THINK IT'S REALLY SHITTY OF YOU TO MOVE OUT OF THE HOUSE. 574 00:26:02,127 --> 00:26:03,294 SHE TOLD YOU THAT? 575 00:26:03,295 --> 00:26:05,796 HOW CAN YOU LEAVE HER WHEN SHE NEEDS YOU? 576 00:26:05,797 --> 00:26:09,600 ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? 577 00:26:09,601 --> 00:26:14,171 WHY DON'T YOU ASK HER THAT? 578 00:26:14,172 --> 00:26:18,076 I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH HER. 579 00:26:28,420 --> 00:26:31,055 OH. YOU'RE HERE. 580 00:26:31,056 --> 00:26:32,523 YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO COME. 581 00:26:32,524 --> 00:26:37,161 HE DOESN'T KNOW YOU'RE SICK. 582 00:26:37,162 --> 00:26:41,599 YOU SAID HE KNEW. 583 00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:43,701 I JUST WANT TO LIVE A LITTLE LONGER 584 00:26:43,702 --> 00:26:46,003 WITHOUT EVERYTHING BEING ABOUT MY BEING SICK. 585 00:26:46,004 --> 00:26:48,672 I-I JUST WANT TO BE HAPPY 586 00:26:48,673 --> 00:26:51,609 JUST A LITTLE LONGER. 587 00:26:51,610 --> 00:26:54,211 TELLING PAUL I HAVE CANCER WILL NOT MAKE ME HAPPY. 588 00:26:54,212 --> 00:26:56,681 HOW DO YOU KNOW? 589 00:27:20,538 --> 00:27:21,939 PAUL-- 590 00:27:21,940 --> 00:27:25,209 I WANT A DIVORCE. 591 00:27:25,210 --> 00:27:28,312 Captioning by CaptionMax www.captionmax.com 592 00:27:28,313 --> 00:27:30,214 ♪ WROTE ME A SONG ♪ 593 00:27:30,215 --> 00:27:32,816 ♪ AND YOU SAID WE WERE WRONG ♪ 594 00:27:32,817 --> 00:27:36,086 ♪ AND YOU CRIED ♪ 595 00:27:36,087 --> 00:27:38,990 ♪ WE GAVE IT A SHOT ♪ 596 00:27:39,090 --> 00:27:41,558 ♪ BUT THE THING WE FORGOT ♪ 597 00:27:41,559 --> 00:27:45,263 ♪ WAS TO TRY ♪ 598 00:27:47,599 --> 00:27:52,403 ♪ THANKS, I THINK I'LL BE ALONE ♪ 599 00:27:52,404 --> 00:27:54,939 ♪ FOR NOW ♪ 600 00:27:56,941 --> 00:28:01,979 ♪ THANKS, I THINK I'LL BE ALONE ♪ 601 00:28:01,980 --> 00:28:04,015 ♪ FOR NOW ♪ 41308

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