Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,841 --> 00:00:07,678
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
2
00:00:07,745 --> 00:00:09,713
[ SAWING ]
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLES ]
3
00:00:16,954 --> 00:00:18,622
IT'S ALIVE!
4
00:00:26,163 --> 00:00:31,268
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
5
00:00:31,334 --> 00:00:36,373
[ SMOOCH! ]
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
6
00:00:37,007 --> 00:00:38,409
YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS!
7
00:00:38,476 --> 00:00:39,976
ACTUALLY, BABY, I DO.
8
00:00:40,043 --> 00:00:41,245
I LOVE YOU.
9
00:00:41,311 --> 00:00:43,880
NEVER A DOUBT IN MY MIND.
10
00:00:43,947 --> 00:00:45,416
FOR THE QUEEN!
11
00:00:45,483 --> 00:00:48,419
[ CHOKING ]
[ EXPLOSION ]
12
00:00:48,486 --> 00:00:50,421
[ GROANS ]
13
00:00:50,954 --> 00:00:51,888
HE DID IT!
14
00:00:51,955 --> 00:00:53,390
[ ALL CHEERING ]
15
00:00:53,457 --> 00:00:54,591
WAYPOINT SET, MASTER CHIEF.
16
00:00:54,658 --> 00:00:55,659
COVENANT FORCES INCOMING.
17
00:00:55,726 --> 00:00:57,394
YOU'RE MY EYES AND EARS,
CORTANA.
18
00:00:57,461 --> 00:00:58,262
ON MY WAY.
19
00:00:58,328 --> 00:01:00,998
RIGHT AFTER I TAKE A QUICK
LEAK.
20
00:01:01,065 --> 00:01:02,366
DETECTING ENEMY -- OH!
21
00:01:02,433 --> 00:01:03,133
I-I'M SORRY!
22
00:01:03,200 --> 00:01:03,901
OH, SHIT!
23
00:01:03,967 --> 00:01:04,769
CORTANA! WAIT!
24
00:01:04,835 --> 00:01:06,170
OH, GREAT.
25
00:01:06,237 --> 00:01:09,139
UM, ENEMY COMBATANT
500 METERS AHEAD.
26
00:01:09,206 --> 00:01:11,408
WAIT. CORTANA, REMEMBER
5 SECONDS AGO?
27
00:01:11,475 --> 00:01:12,242
DID YOU SEE MY PEENER?
28
00:01:12,309 --> 00:01:13,343
I MEAN, I DON'T CARE.
29
00:01:13,410 --> 00:01:14,945
I'M JUST -- IT'S JUST, I'M
STRESSED RIGHT NOW WITH THE
30
00:01:15,012 --> 00:01:16,881
FIGHTING, AND MY PEENER'S A
LITTLE SMALLER THAN USUAL.
31
00:01:16,947 --> 00:01:17,381
HEADS UP!
32
00:01:17,448 --> 00:01:18,582
GOT 'EM.
33
00:01:18,649 --> 00:01:20,985
ANYWAY, I DON'T WANT TO BEAT A
DEAD HORSE HERE, BUT MY PEENER
34
00:01:21,052 --> 00:01:23,487
BEING THAT SMALL, THAT'S, LIKE,
A SUPER-RARE THING.
35
00:01:23,554 --> 00:01:23,988
NOTED.
36
00:01:24,055 --> 00:01:24,789
YOU KNOW WHAT?
37
00:01:24,855 --> 00:01:26,356
I STILL GOT TO PEE JUST A LITTLE
BIT.
38
00:01:26,423 --> 00:01:27,191
CAN I HAVE A SECOND?
39
00:01:27,258 --> 00:01:28,192
YEAH, SURE. WHATEVER.
40
00:01:28,259 --> 00:01:29,894
OKAY, LITTLE CHIEF -- TIME TO
CHUB UP.
41
00:01:29,960 --> 00:01:30,795
HERE WE GO.
42
00:01:30,861 --> 00:01:32,496
ALYSSA MILANO IN
"POISON IVY 2," GIRL FROM
43
00:01:32,563 --> 00:01:33,831
"CRADLE OF LOVE" VIDEO...
44
00:01:33,897 --> 00:01:35,132
MMM, NICE.
45
00:01:35,199 --> 00:01:37,234
HOUSTON, WE HAVE PLUMPAGE.
46
00:01:37,301 --> 00:01:38,102
CORTANA, CORTANA!
47
00:01:38,169 --> 00:01:39,870
YES, CHIEF, WHAT IS THE --
OH, GOD!
48
00:01:39,936 --> 00:01:41,038
OH, IT'S CRAZY!
49
00:01:41,105 --> 00:01:42,006
THERE WAS AN ATTACK!
50
00:01:42,073 --> 00:01:42,539
OH, MAN.
51
00:01:42,606 --> 00:01:43,774
I HOPE I WASN'T SHOT!
52
00:01:43,840 --> 00:01:46,243
UH, HEAD, CHEST, MY PEENER, THAT
IS RIGHT NOW AT THE LENGTH AND
53
00:01:46,310 --> 00:01:48,578
THICKNESS THAT REPRESENTS THE
USUAL SIZE OF MY PEENER.
54
00:01:48,645 --> 00:01:49,747
CHIEF...
55
00:01:49,813 --> 00:01:51,682
SORRY IF YOU CAUGHT A GLIMPSE
OF MY PEENER DURING THAT.
56
00:01:51,748 --> 00:01:52,850
YOU SAW THAT, RIGHT?
57
00:01:52,916 --> 00:01:53,383
CRAZY.
58
00:01:53,450 --> 00:01:54,551
IT'S NOT A BIG DEAL.
59
00:01:54,618 --> 00:01:56,053
[ CHUCKLES ]
LITERALLY.
60
00:01:56,120 --> 00:01:56,787
PARDON ME?
61
00:01:56,853 --> 00:01:57,855
HEY, NEEDLE PEEN!
62
00:01:57,921 --> 00:01:59,289
AAH!
63
00:01:59,356 --> 00:02:00,491
SO, WHAT ARE YOU IN FOR?
64
00:02:00,557 --> 00:02:03,494
WELL, I WAS MINDING MY OWN
BUSINESS, EATING SOME FOOD, AND
65
00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:06,364
THEN SOME MORE FOOD STARTED
SHOOTING AT ME, SO I STARTING
66
00:02:06,430 --> 00:02:09,533
EATING THAT FOOD, AND THEN LIKE
TWO MORE FOODS SURROUNDED ME...
67
00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:10,501
AND I WOKE UP HERE.
68
00:02:10,567 --> 00:02:12,870
FUCKING FOOD, MAN.
69
00:02:12,937 --> 00:02:14,405
FUCKING FOOD.
70
00:02:14,471 --> 00:02:15,506
ABBY!
71
00:02:15,572 --> 00:02:18,108
WE'D LIKE TO INVITE YOU TO JOIN
THE BABYSITTERS CLUB!
72
00:02:18,175 --> 00:02:20,344
ALL THE BABY-SITTERS IN
STONEYBROOK JOIN, AND THE CLUB
73
00:02:20,410 --> 00:02:21,412
ONLY TAKES 15%.
74
00:02:21,478 --> 00:02:22,513
NO, THANKS.
75
00:02:22,579 --> 00:02:24,548
I HAVE MY OWN CLIENTS, AND I GET
TO KEEP ALL THE MONEY.
76
00:02:24,615 --> 00:02:26,650
WE ARE BABYSITTING IN THIS
TOWN.
77
00:02:26,717 --> 00:02:29,252
IF WE ASK YOU TO JOIN, YOU JOIN.
78
00:02:29,319 --> 00:02:30,755
SORRY.
79
00:02:32,456 --> 00:02:32,990
HI, TODD.
80
00:02:33,057 --> 00:02:34,224
I'M HERE FOR OUR DATE.
81
00:02:34,291 --> 00:02:36,594
LISTEN, I DON'T THINK WE CAN
BE BOYFRIEND-GIRLFRIEND ANYMORE.
82
00:02:36,661 --> 00:02:38,496
BABY-SITTER CLUB TOLD ME YOU
HAVE AIDS.
83
00:02:38,562 --> 00:02:39,763
NOW WE'RE HAVING A FOUR-WAY.
84
00:02:39,830 --> 00:02:40,798
WHA?
85
00:02:40,865 --> 00:02:43,701
[ CRYING ]
HOW COULD THEY DO THIS TO ME?
86
00:02:43,768 --> 00:02:48,572
[ GASPS ]
HMM?
87
00:02:48,639 --> 00:02:51,008
AAH! AAH!
88
00:02:51,075 --> 00:02:52,643
AAH!
89
00:02:52,710 --> 00:02:53,411
MOM, DAD!
90
00:02:53,477 --> 00:02:55,178
THEY PUT A WOLF IN MY CLOSET!
91
00:02:55,245 --> 00:02:57,180
WHO PUT A WOLF IN YOUR
CLOSET?!
92
00:02:57,247 --> 00:02:58,916
[ GUNSHOTS ]
NO!
93
00:02:58,983 --> 00:03:00,751
I'LL NEVER JOIN YOU!
94
00:03:00,818 --> 00:03:03,654
I'LL FIGHT YOU TO THE GATES OF
HELL!
95
00:03:03,721 --> 00:03:07,191
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
MORE "BABY-SITTERS CLUB"!
96
00:03:07,258 --> 00:03:10,194
NOW VOTING ON
RESOLUTION 765 -- 1% INCREASE IN
97
00:03:10,261 --> 00:03:12,296
SANITATION AID FOR
EAST MONGOLIA.
98
00:03:12,363 --> 00:03:13,064
ALL IN FAVOR?
99
00:03:13,130 --> 00:03:13,998
Together: AYE.
100
00:03:14,064 --> 00:03:15,432
RESOLUTION PASSES.
101
00:03:15,499 --> 00:03:18,936
NOW VOTING ON RESOLUTION 766 --
ALL COUNTRIES SHALL BOW TO
102
00:03:19,002 --> 00:03:19,670
DR. DOOM.
103
00:03:19,737 --> 00:03:20,737
ALL IN FAVOR?
104
00:03:20,804 --> 00:03:21,738
AYE!
105
00:03:21,805 --> 00:03:25,642
NOW ALL SHALL KNEEL BEFORE THE
MIGHT OF DOCTOR --
106
00:03:25,709 --> 00:03:26,310
ALL OPPOSED?
107
00:03:26,377 --> 00:03:27,078
Together: NAY.
108
00:03:27,144 --> 00:03:28,245
RESOLUTION FAILS.
109
00:03:28,312 --> 00:03:30,915
[ SIGHS ]
WORTH A SHOT, RIGHT?
110
00:03:30,981 --> 00:03:33,817
OH, YOU ARE SO ADORABLE.
111
00:03:33,884 --> 00:03:35,252
OKAY...
112
00:03:35,319 --> 00:03:37,788
NOW TAKE ALL OF YOUR CLOTHES
OFF.
113
00:03:37,855 --> 00:03:39,590
REOW?!
114
00:03:39,657 --> 00:03:42,894
VISIONARIES, YOU SHALL
RECEIVE MAGIC IN THE FORM OF
115
00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:44,628
POWERFUL ANIMAL TOTEMS.
116
00:03:44,695 --> 00:03:47,831
WITTERQUICK, DUE TO YOUR
BLINDING SPEED, RECEIVE THE
117
00:03:47,898 --> 00:03:50,067
POWER OF THE CHEETAH!
118
00:03:50,133 --> 00:03:52,469
[ ROARS ]
INCREDIBLE!
119
00:03:52,536 --> 00:03:55,806
TOBY, YOUR STEALTH HAS EARNED
YOU THE TOTEM OF...
120
00:03:55,873 --> 00:03:56,941
THE TOOTHPICK FISH.
121
00:03:57,007 --> 00:03:59,076
WHAT THE FUCK IS A
TOOTHPICK FISH?
122
00:03:59,142 --> 00:03:59,710
OH, YEAH!
123
00:03:59,777 --> 00:04:00,645
I READ ABOUT THOSE.
124
00:04:00,711 --> 00:04:01,912
SOME GUY PEED IN THE AMAZON.
125
00:04:01,979 --> 00:04:04,381
THE TOOTHPICK FISH SWAM UP HIS
URINE STREAM AND INTO HIS
126
00:04:04,448 --> 00:04:05,115
URETHRA.
127
00:04:05,182 --> 00:04:06,651
HE HAD TO HAVE ELABORATE
SURGERY.
128
00:04:06,717 --> 00:04:09,186
MERKLYNN, CAN I HAVE ANOTHER
TOTEM, PLEASE?
129
00:04:09,253 --> 00:04:12,490
NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO SWIMMING
UP A PEE STREAM INTO A BAD
130
00:04:12,556 --> 00:04:13,558
GUY'S DONGER!
131
00:04:13,624 --> 00:04:16,661
ONCE THE TOTEM HAS BEEN
BESTOWED, IT IS PERMANENT.
132
00:04:16,727 --> 00:04:18,963
OH, THAT'S FANTASTIC NEWS.
133
00:04:19,030 --> 00:04:21,365
[ ALL SCREAM ]
WITNESS THE RISE OF
134
00:04:21,432 --> 00:04:22,600
DARKSTORM!
135
00:04:22,666 --> 00:04:25,836
TO ASSERT MY DOMINANCE OVER YOU,
I SHALL PISS ON YOUR BATTERED
136
00:04:25,903 --> 00:04:26,571
BODIES!
137
00:04:26,637 --> 00:04:27,972
AHH.
138
00:04:28,039 --> 00:04:29,373
OH, JACKPOT!
139
00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:31,675
IT'S TOBY TIME!
140
00:04:34,078 --> 00:04:34,712
AAH!
141
00:04:34,778 --> 00:04:36,246
AAH! SOMETHING'S IN MY URETHRA!
142
00:04:36,313 --> 00:04:38,816
IT IS LIKE A BLADDER INFECTION
BUT WORSE!
143
00:04:38,883 --> 00:04:41,485
I-I NEED TO GET THIS CHECKED
OUT!
144
00:04:42,286 --> 00:04:44,722
TOBY, YOU SAVED OUR LIVES!
145
00:04:44,788 --> 00:04:45,623
TOBY?
146
00:04:45,689 --> 00:04:47,725
I THINK HE'S STILL IN
DARKSTORM'S DICK.
147
00:04:47,791 --> 00:04:51,095
THAT IS GOING TO REQUIRE
ELABORATE SURGERY.
148
00:04:51,162 --> 00:04:54,565
COMRADE OBAMA CUT THE DEFENSE
BUDGET AGAIN, GENERAL HAWK.
149
00:04:54,631 --> 00:04:58,168
I CAN NIX OUR EFFICIENT DRONE
PROGRAM OR THE G.I. JOE PROGRAM
150
00:04:58,235 --> 00:05:01,805
THAT RACKS UP BILLIONS TO STOP A
SINGLE TERRORIST GROUP!
151
00:05:01,872 --> 00:05:04,408
I MEAN, FOR FUCK'S SAKE, WHERE
WERE YOU ON 9/11?
152
00:05:04,475 --> 00:05:06,944
ENDING COBRA'S SCHEME TO
CONQUER AMERICA WITH AN EVIL
153
00:05:07,011 --> 00:05:08,045
TELETHON! OH, GOD.
154
00:05:08,112 --> 00:05:09,847
I'LL SEE MYSELF OUT, SIR.
155
00:05:09,914 --> 00:05:12,216
GOODBYE, ARMY OF
VILLAGE PEOPLE REJECTS.
156
00:05:12,282 --> 00:05:14,552
SAY HELLO TO G.I. DRONE!
157
00:05:16,053 --> 00:05:19,623
♪ G.I. DRONE
♪ G.I. DRONE
158
00:05:19,690 --> 00:05:23,161
♪ IT BOMBS FOR FREEDOM
WITHOUT ANY CONSCIENCE ♪
159
00:05:23,227 --> 00:05:26,397
G.I. DRONE IS THE CODE NAME
FOR AMERICA'S SOULLESS,
160
00:05:26,464 --> 00:05:29,166
HIGH-TECH KILLING MACHINES.
161
00:05:30,401 --> 00:05:31,902
AAH!
162
00:05:32,970 --> 00:05:33,904
HOLY SHIT!
163
00:05:33,971 --> 00:05:36,440
ITS PURPOSE -- TO BOMB THE
FUCK OUT OF WHOEVER,
164
00:05:36,507 --> 00:05:37,775
WHENEVER.
165
00:05:37,842 --> 00:05:38,576
OH, YEAH.
166
00:05:38,643 --> 00:05:40,344
WE HAVE AN ERECTION, TOO.
167
00:05:40,411 --> 00:05:42,480
HIDE IN THAT HOSPITAL!
168
00:05:42,547 --> 00:05:45,383
WHAT HAPPENED TO
PROPORTIONATE FUCKING RESPONSE?!
169
00:05:45,450 --> 00:05:47,485
I ONLY WANTED TO CONTROL THE
WEATHER!
170
00:05:47,552 --> 00:05:50,688
♪ G.I. MOTHERFUCKING DRONE
171
00:05:50,755 --> 00:05:52,490
ACCORDING TO PASSOVER TRADITION,
172
00:05:52,557 --> 00:05:54,825
I WILL PARDON ONE PRISONER
OF YOUR CHOOSING.
173
00:05:54,892 --> 00:05:58,896
WILL YOU PARDON THE MURDERER
BARABBAS, OR WILL YOU PARDON
174
00:05:58,963 --> 00:05:59,763
JESUS?
175
00:05:59,830 --> 00:06:01,699
BARABBAS! BARABBAS!
176
00:06:01,765 --> 00:06:02,700
BARABBAS!
177
00:06:02,766 --> 00:06:04,936
BARABBAS, YOU ARE PARDONED.
178
00:06:05,003 --> 00:06:05,770
WHAT?
179
00:06:05,836 --> 00:06:07,571
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT! AAAAAH!
180
00:06:07,638 --> 00:06:09,306
WAIT. WHICH ONE IS THE MAGIC
ONE?
181
00:06:09,373 --> 00:06:11,843
[ Crying ] I'M THE MAGIC ONE!
182
00:06:11,909 --> 00:06:15,379
NO TAKEBACKS, CHICKENHEADS!
183
00:06:16,180 --> 00:06:19,183
THE MIDNIGHT SOCIETY IS NOW
IN SESSION.
184
00:06:19,250 --> 00:06:23,888
CAN YOU ALL HANDLE BETTY ANN'S
SCARY STORY, OR ARE YOU AFRAID
185
00:06:23,954 --> 00:06:25,356
OF THE DARK?
186
00:06:25,423 --> 00:06:27,992
[ ALL GASP ]
MY STORY ACTUALLY HAPPENED TO
187
00:06:28,059 --> 00:06:28,625
ME.
188
00:06:28,692 --> 00:06:30,962
I CALL IT "NIGHT OF TERROR."
189
00:06:31,029 --> 00:06:34,431
I AGREED TO A DATE WITH A GUY,
WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS, WHO I
190
00:06:34,498 --> 00:06:36,033
DID NOT WANT TO GO OUT WITH.
191
00:06:36,100 --> 00:06:38,703
BUT OUR PARENTS ARE FRIENDS SO
I HAD TO.
192
00:06:38,769 --> 00:06:41,072
IT WAS A SHIT-SHOW FROM THE
MOMENT HE SHOWED UP IN HIS
193
00:06:41,139 --> 00:06:42,339
CRAPPY NISSAN.
194
00:06:42,406 --> 00:06:43,574
HI, BETTY ANN!
195
00:06:43,641 --> 00:06:46,944
HE WAS SO NERVOUS, HE EJAC'd IN
HIS KHAKIS AND THEN RAN INTO A
196
00:06:47,011 --> 00:06:48,445
LOW-HANGING TREE BRANCH.
197
00:06:48,512 --> 00:06:49,681
AAH!
198
00:06:49,747 --> 00:06:52,016
[ LAUGHTER ]
HEY, DON'T YOU DRIVE A
199
00:06:52,083 --> 00:06:52,950
NISSAN, GARY?
200
00:06:53,017 --> 00:06:54,085
WHAT?! NO!
201
00:06:54,152 --> 00:06:56,620
YES! I MEAN --
AAH!
202
00:06:56,687 --> 00:06:57,654
UNH! AAH!
203
00:06:57,721 --> 00:07:01,392
[ LAUGHTER ]
OH, MY KHAKIS!
204
00:07:02,059 --> 00:07:04,362
FORREST, WE'VE BEEN MARRIED
FOR A WHILE.
205
00:07:04,428 --> 00:07:06,130
MAYBE WE SHOULD SPICE THINGS UP.
206
00:07:06,197 --> 00:07:07,432
TALK DIRTY TO ME.
207
00:07:07,498 --> 00:07:09,199
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, JEN-NY?
208
00:07:09,266 --> 00:07:10,234
I DON'T KNOW.
209
00:07:10,301 --> 00:07:11,569
SAY SOMETHING MEAN.
210
00:07:11,636 --> 00:07:12,703
OKAY.
211
00:07:12,770 --> 00:07:15,373
YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT.
212
00:07:15,439 --> 00:07:17,542
NOT WHAT I HAD IN MIND,
FORREST.
213
00:07:17,609 --> 00:07:20,611
SAY SOMETHING ELSE, BUT CALL ME
A SLUT AFTER.
214
00:07:20,678 --> 00:07:21,612
OKAY.
215
00:07:21,679 --> 00:07:26,083
STAYING SOBER IS A DAILY
STRUGGLE FOR YOU...SLUT.
216
00:07:26,150 --> 00:07:27,084
FORREST!
217
00:07:27,151 --> 00:07:28,118
JUST, UM...
218
00:07:28,185 --> 00:07:29,487
BE ROUGH WITH ME.
219
00:07:29,553 --> 00:07:31,922
DON'T WORRY. I'LL LIKE IT.
220
00:07:31,989 --> 00:07:32,557
OW!
221
00:07:32,624 --> 00:07:33,824
SHIT, FORREST!
222
00:07:33,891 --> 00:07:36,894
SPICING THINGS UP IS HARD,
JEN-NY.
223
00:07:36,961 --> 00:07:39,530
I'M GONNA GO GET SOME ICE.
224
00:07:39,597 --> 00:07:42,199
BITCH BE OUT OF HER DAMN
MIND.
225
00:07:43,067 --> 00:07:44,602
OW!
226
00:07:44,669 --> 00:07:46,036
OW!
227
00:07:46,103 --> 00:07:48,172
ALL RIGHT, Y'ALL, LET'S GET
SEXY!
228
00:07:48,239 --> 00:07:51,141
THAT WAS A TERRIBLE WAY TO
START A GRIEF-COUNSELING
229
00:07:51,208 --> 00:07:51,742
SESSION.
230
00:07:51,809 --> 00:07:53,477
YEAH. HOW TERRIBLE.
231
00:07:55,479 --> 00:07:56,547
HONEY, LOOK OUT!
232
00:07:56,614 --> 00:07:57,348
CLICHé!
233
00:07:57,414 --> 00:07:58,683
HUH?
234
00:07:58,750 --> 00:08:00,918
[ ALL SCREAMING ]
235
00:08:02,052 --> 00:08:02,653
WHAT'S HAPPENING?!
236
00:08:02,720 --> 00:08:03,287
KRE-O!
237
00:08:03,354 --> 00:08:05,789
THEY'RE EVERYWH--
AAH!
238
00:08:05,856 --> 00:08:06,958
RUN!
239
00:08:07,024 --> 00:08:08,426
THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH
THEM.
240
00:08:08,493 --> 00:08:10,861
THEY LOOK LIKE US BUT DIFFERENT!
241
00:08:11,429 --> 00:08:12,363
THIS WAY! HURRY!
242
00:08:12,430 --> 00:08:19,270
YOUR LIFE HAS MORE VALUE THAN
OTHER PEOPLE!
243
00:08:19,337 --> 00:08:21,472
JERRY, WE NEED YOUR EXPERTISE!
244
00:08:21,539 --> 00:08:22,640
MY EXPERTISE?
245
00:08:22,707 --> 00:08:23,507
I'M NOT A SOLDIER!
246
00:08:23,574 --> 00:08:25,443
JERRY, WE NEED A LAWYER.
247
00:08:28,879 --> 00:08:30,514
PUT SIMPLY, JERRY, WE'RE
BEING INVADED...
248
00:08:30,581 --> 00:08:32,516
BY IMITATION BLOCKS.
249
00:08:32,583 --> 00:08:35,319
OFF-BRAND PRODUCTS WITH A
TASTE FOR LEGO BLOOD!
250
00:08:35,386 --> 00:08:38,356
THEY'RE NEARLY IDENTICAL BUT
DIFFERENT...WRONG.
251
00:08:38,423 --> 00:08:40,591
LIKE WHEN YOU SIT ON YOUR HAND
UNTIL IT GOES TO SLEEP.
252
00:08:40,658 --> 00:08:43,061
YOU TRY TO PRETEND FLO FROM THE
PROGRESSIVE COMMERCIALS IS
253
00:08:43,127 --> 00:08:45,263
GIVING YOU AN H.J., BUT YOU
KNOW IT'S NOT FLO.
254
00:08:45,330 --> 00:08:46,330
YOU KNOW THAT!
255
00:08:46,397 --> 00:08:48,900
SHE'D NEVER BE SO CLUMSY, SO
ARTLESS.
256
00:08:48,966 --> 00:08:49,968
THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!
257
00:08:50,034 --> 00:08:50,969
WE'RE TRADEMARKED!
258
00:08:51,035 --> 00:08:51,870
NO, GENERAL.
259
00:08:51,936 --> 00:08:53,737
LEGO BRICKS AREN'T PROTECTED BY
TRADEMARK.
260
00:08:53,804 --> 00:08:55,073
THEY'RE PROTECTED BY PATENT.
261
00:08:55,139 --> 00:08:56,875
HELL, MAN, WHAT'S THE
DIFFERENCE?
262
00:08:56,941 --> 00:08:58,342
THE DIFFERENCE IS...
263
00:08:58,409 --> 00:09:00,077
PATENTS EXPIRE.
264
00:09:00,144 --> 00:09:02,880
COOL! SOMEONE TURNED THAT LEGAL
DOCUMENT INTO A GIF.
265
00:09:02,947 --> 00:09:03,548
THAT'S FUN.
266
00:09:03,614 --> 00:09:04,582
ISN'T IT "JIFF"?
267
00:09:04,648 --> 00:09:05,850
ANYWAY, HOW DO WE STOP IT?
268
00:09:05,917 --> 00:09:07,251
THERE'S NOTHING WE CAN DO.
269
00:09:07,318 --> 00:09:08,119
Don't worry, Flo.
270
00:09:08,186 --> 00:09:09,120
I'll protect you.
271
00:09:09,187 --> 00:09:10,888
DON'T WORRY, GIRL FROM THE
WENDY'S COMMERCIALS.
272
00:09:10,955 --> 00:09:13,124
DON'T WORRY, GEICO GECKO.
273
00:09:13,191 --> 00:09:16,528
THEY COVERED THE WHOLE GLOBE
IN NO TIME -- MEGA BLOKS, KRE-O,
274
00:09:16,594 --> 00:09:20,565
BEST-LOCK, CoCo, BanBao,
ROKENBOK, SUPER BLOX, AND LEGGO
275
00:09:20,631 --> 00:09:23,968
WITH TWO G's, WHICH WAS
ESPECIALLY INSULTING.
276
00:09:24,035 --> 00:09:26,237
[ ZOMBIES GROANING ]
277
00:09:26,304 --> 00:09:28,405
♪ LEGO MY BABY
♪ LEGO MY HONEY
278
00:09:28,472 --> 00:09:30,642
♪ LEGO MY RAGTIME GAL
DADDY, ARE WE SAFE?
279
00:09:30,708 --> 00:09:31,743
OF COURSE WE ARE, SON.
280
00:09:31,810 --> 00:09:33,110
PEOPLE ARE SINGING, AREN'T THEY?
281
00:09:33,177 --> 00:09:33,845
UGH.
282
00:09:33,912 --> 00:09:35,813
THAT IS THE LOWEST FORM OF
MUSIC.
283
00:09:35,880 --> 00:09:39,083
♪ HONEY, YOU'LL LOSE ME
♪ THEN YOU'LL BE LEFT ALONE
284
00:09:39,150 --> 00:09:42,920
[ ZOMBIES GROANING LOUDLY ]
THE TERRIBLE SINGING!
285
00:09:42,987 --> 00:09:45,289
THEY'RE ATTRACTED TO THE
TERRIBLE SINGING!
286
00:09:45,356 --> 00:09:46,123
OHH!
287
00:09:46,190 --> 00:09:47,258
OW!
288
00:09:47,325 --> 00:09:48,392
FIRE! FIRE!
289
00:09:48,459 --> 00:09:49,393
THEY'RE TOO FAST!
290
00:09:49,460 --> 00:09:50,995
OHH!
291
00:09:51,062 --> 00:09:53,665
JERRY, I'VE FOUND A WAY TO
CAMOUFLAGE OURSELVES!
292
00:09:53,731 --> 00:09:54,932
THAT BEATS MY SOLUTION.
293
00:09:54,999 --> 00:09:56,433
PEW PEW! PEW PEW! PEW!
294
00:09:56,500 --> 00:09:59,336
LEGOS ARE MACHINED TO A
TOLERANCE OF 10 MICROMETERS!
295
00:09:59,403 --> 00:10:00,772
THAT'S WHY WE'RE SO EXPENSIVE!
296
00:10:00,839 --> 00:10:03,841
BUT THIS SERUM WILL MAKE US
LOOK CHEAPER AND SLOPPIER!
297
00:10:03,908 --> 00:10:04,809
AAH!
298
00:10:04,876 --> 00:10:06,377
WE LOOK LIKE THEM NOW!
299
00:10:06,444 --> 00:10:08,780
I'D...RATHER...DIE.
300
00:10:08,847 --> 00:10:09,346
WHAT?!
301
00:10:09,413 --> 00:10:10,948
THEY HAVE TRANSFORMERS?
302
00:10:11,015 --> 00:10:12,817
NO, SON! NO!
303
00:10:12,884 --> 00:10:13,685
AAH!
304
00:10:13,751 --> 00:10:15,386
NOOOOOOOOOO!
305
00:10:15,453 --> 00:10:17,789
YOU PROBABLY DON'T EVEN WANT
TO GO ON LIVING NOW.
306
00:10:17,856 --> 00:10:20,492
HUH? OH, THAT WAS JUST A KID
FROM MY WIFE'S FIRST MARRIAGE.
307
00:10:20,558 --> 00:10:22,159
BUT THAT LOOKED REALLY PAINFUL.
308
00:10:22,226 --> 00:10:23,828
HIT ME WITH THE JUICE!
309
00:10:23,895 --> 00:10:27,532
[ GROANING ]
NO! YOU TURNED ME INTO A FUCKING
310
00:10:27,598 --> 00:10:28,399
DUPLO!
311
00:10:28,466 --> 00:10:30,868
IT'S THE SAME COMPANY AS LEGO,
YOU FOOL!
312
00:10:30,935 --> 00:10:32,303
AAH!
313
00:10:32,370 --> 00:10:34,238
AAH!
314
00:10:34,305 --> 00:10:36,407
GUYS, IS THIS ENDING WORKING?
315
00:10:36,474 --> 00:10:37,875
LET'S RE-SHOOT IT.
316
00:10:37,942 --> 00:10:40,377
[ ZOMBIES MURMURING ]
317
00:10:40,444 --> 00:10:42,614
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
318
00:10:42,680 --> 00:10:44,749
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK
BAWK BAWK ♪
319
00:10:44,816 --> 00:10:46,884
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
320
00:10:46,951 --> 00:10:49,053
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK
BAWK BAWK ♪
321
00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:51,188
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
322
00:10:51,255 --> 00:10:53,390
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK
BAWK BAWK ♪
323
00:10:53,457 --> 00:10:55,326
BA-GAWK! BAWK.
21616
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof