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1
00:00:05,039 --> 00:00:05,973
[thunder crashes]
2
00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:08,809
[laughs evilly]
3
00:00:08,876 --> 00:00:10,978
[ sawing ]
4
00:00:16,083 --> 00:00:18,019
[ electricity crackles ]
5
00:00:18,085 --> 00:00:19,887
It's alive!
6
00:00:27,294 --> 00:00:28,396
[thunder crashes]
7
00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:32,400
[laughs evilly]
8
00:00:32,466 --> 00:00:34,402
[ smooch! ]
9
00:00:34,468 --> 00:00:35,870
[laughs evilly]
10
00:00:40,074 --> 00:00:42,710
You know, Lois, Krypto might
need a little snip-snip.
11
00:00:42,777 --> 00:00:44,178
[whines]
12
00:00:44,245 --> 00:00:46,113
Sorry, old buddy.
Gotta do it.
13
00:00:46,180 --> 00:00:47,715
It's for your own good,
Krypto!
14
00:00:47,782 --> 00:00:49,950
It'll reduce the probability of
perianal adenomas!
15
00:00:50,017 --> 00:00:52,620
That's ass cancer!
16
00:00:52,686 --> 00:00:55,089
Sit! Sit!
17
00:00:55,156 --> 00:00:56,924
[grunting ]
18
00:00:56,991 --> 00:00:59,927
Oww! Let go of my --
19
00:00:59,994 --> 00:01:03,064
Those balls are coming off
whether you like it or not!
20
00:01:03,130 --> 00:01:05,433
Gonna assume
you don't like it.
21
00:01:05,499 --> 00:01:07,468
There now.
That wasn't so bad, was it?
22
00:01:07,535 --> 00:01:08,803
[Zapping]
23
00:01:08,869 --> 00:01:10,538
[ Screams ]
24
00:01:14,108 --> 00:01:15,443
[whines]
25
00:01:15,509 --> 00:01:17,044
Can I take your order,
please?
26
00:01:17,111 --> 00:01:19,914
- Yeah. Can I get a what-what?
- What-what!
27
00:01:19,980 --> 00:01:21,082
Man, I'm thirsty.
28
00:01:21,148 --> 00:01:22,683
[ Chuckles ]
Watch this.
29
00:01:22,750 --> 00:01:25,052
Hey, Kool-Aid!
30
00:01:25,119 --> 00:01:27,221
Just give it a second.
31
00:01:27,288 --> 00:01:30,624
Yeah. Your imagination is a pretty
piss-poor solution to my thirst,
32
00:01:30,691 --> 00:01:34,728
and the kitchen is literally
10 feet away, so...
33
00:01:34,795 --> 00:01:37,231
You're just like my real dad,
Kool-Aid.
34
00:01:37,298 --> 00:01:39,033
You never show up.
35
00:01:39,100 --> 00:01:42,169
♪ [Spanish music playing] ♪
36
00:01:44,638 --> 00:01:46,607
WOMAN:
Dora! Dora!
37
00:01:46,674 --> 00:01:48,008
Wha-a-a-a-at?!
38
00:01:48,075 --> 00:01:49,710
It's almost time for your
quinceañera!
39
00:01:49,777 --> 00:01:51,278
I need you to run
to the store!
40
00:01:51,345 --> 00:01:54,782
[sighs loudly]
41
00:01:54,849 --> 00:01:56,383
Fine!
42
00:01:59,820 --> 00:02:03,257
Soda, cookies, horchata...
barf!
43
00:02:03,324 --> 00:02:05,025
[ Sweetly ]
Help me out!
44
00:02:05,092 --> 00:02:08,629
Which beer has the highest
alcohol by volume?
45
00:02:08,696 --> 00:02:10,598
[ Ding! ]
Good choice!
46
00:02:10,664 --> 00:02:13,701
Uh, Dora, you're not old
enough to buy that.
47
00:02:13,767 --> 00:02:15,102
No shit.
48
00:02:15,169 --> 00:02:17,171
Dora, please, no!
It's wrong!
49
00:02:17,238 --> 00:02:18,439
[ Chokes ]
50
00:02:18,506 --> 00:02:20,508
Now let's complete this
transaction!
51
00:02:20,574 --> 00:02:22,243
Hey! Stop that kid!
52
00:02:22,309 --> 00:02:23,811
I need your help again!
53
00:02:23,878 --> 00:02:25,379
I need everybody to shout,
54
00:02:25,446 --> 00:02:27,281
"Where my motherfucking
map at?"
55
00:02:27,348 --> 00:02:30,351
[ ding! ]
Aw, yeah!
56
00:02:30,417 --> 00:02:33,087
Map, show me where to find
my friend Marcus!
57
00:02:33,154 --> 00:02:34,722
He's always holding.
58
00:02:34,788 --> 00:02:38,192
I, uh --
I don't know, Dora.
59
00:02:38,259 --> 00:02:41,061
[ Screaming, crying]
Okay, okay!
60
00:02:41,128 --> 00:02:43,831
He's at the park on 12th,
under the jungle gym!
61
00:02:43,898 --> 00:02:46,233
He said he might have
some too.
62
00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:49,837
You can call me
Dora the X-plorer!
63
00:02:49,904 --> 00:02:52,740
[slurring ]
Hey! I need your help!
64
00:02:52,806 --> 00:02:55,876
Paulo or Maria?
65
00:02:55,943 --> 00:02:59,380
[ Ding! ]
No argument here!
66
00:02:59,446 --> 00:03:00,381
[all gasp]
67
00:03:00,447 --> 00:03:02,283
[camera shutters clicking]
68
00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:05,853
[laughs ] Just call me
the virginity swiper.
69
00:03:05,920 --> 00:03:09,690
Swiper, no swiping!
Swiper, no swiping!
70
00:03:09,757 --> 00:03:12,059
You're too late!
71
00:03:12,126 --> 00:03:14,962
Oh, man!
72
00:03:15,029 --> 00:03:18,899
I wish Boots was here to see
our little girl become a woman!
73
00:03:18,966 --> 00:03:20,968
Monkeys are cute
when they're little.
74
00:03:21,035 --> 00:03:23,437
But Boots got big.
75
00:03:23,504 --> 00:03:25,072
Oh, hello, Boots!
76
00:03:25,139 --> 00:03:27,708
[ Growls, screeches ]
77
00:03:27,775 --> 00:03:29,577
My God!
78
00:03:29,643 --> 00:03:30,711
[ gunshot ]
79
00:03:30,778 --> 00:03:33,714
Oh, my God!
Dora's on the roof!
80
00:03:33,781 --> 00:03:36,317
I bet I can fly.
81
00:03:36,383 --> 00:03:39,420
Do you think I can fly?
82
00:03:39,486 --> 00:03:42,223
I've never been able
to hear you!!
83
00:03:42,289 --> 00:03:45,292
It's the show's big lie!!
84
00:03:45,359 --> 00:03:46,961
Whoo-hoo!
85
00:03:47,027 --> 00:03:48,195
[all gasp]
86
00:03:48,262 --> 00:03:51,131
Aah, she missed the pool.
87
00:03:51,198 --> 00:03:53,801
Bass with a bass.
88
00:03:53,867 --> 00:03:55,369
Bass
with a bass.
89
00:03:55,436 --> 00:03:57,938
Bass --
bass with a bass.
90
00:04:05,646 --> 00:04:07,314
[Creak]
91
00:04:13,754 --> 00:04:16,090
[echoing moans]
92
00:04:35,109 --> 00:04:37,611
♪ [clarinet plays] ♪
93
00:04:40,914 --> 00:04:43,350
[ laughs]
That ghost is awesome, dude!
94
00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:44,918
Play it again!
95
00:04:47,488 --> 00:04:50,224
So, you're a Shirt Tale.
That must be fun.
96
00:04:50,291 --> 00:04:52,026
Yeah, it's pretty great.
97
00:04:52,092 --> 00:04:54,028
[beep]
And what do you do again?
98
00:04:54,094 --> 00:04:56,096
Oh, uh, I'm the I.T. Manager
for a furniture supply company.
99
00:04:56,163 --> 00:04:58,065
We make those things
you put on table legs
100
00:04:58,132 --> 00:04:59,900
so they don't scratch
the floor.
101
00:04:59,967 --> 00:05:02,202
Wow, that is really
interesting.
102
00:05:02,269 --> 00:05:03,470
[beep]
103
00:05:03,537 --> 00:05:05,539
Uh, are you having
a good time?
104
00:05:05,606 --> 00:05:07,341
Yeah! Totally!
[beep]
105
00:05:07,408 --> 00:05:09,410
Can I get you two
anything else?
106
00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:11,145
Oh, urn,
do you want dessert?
107
00:05:11,211 --> 00:05:13,180
Ah, no. Nothing, thanks.
108
00:05:13,247 --> 00:05:14,581
[beep]
109
00:05:20,688 --> 00:05:22,256
I didn't kill my wife!
110
00:05:22,323 --> 00:05:23,957
I don't care!
111
00:05:24,024 --> 00:05:25,492
ANNOUNCER:
And there's the jump!
112
00:05:25,559 --> 00:05:26,994
COMMENTATOR:
Strong take off.
113
00:05:27,061 --> 00:05:28,729
- He moves from the classic
forward approach and hurdle
114
00:05:28,796 --> 00:05:30,064
to the open pike position.
115
00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:31,632
- There's the tuck,
the twist, and...
116
00:05:31,699 --> 00:05:33,801
a fairly clean entry,
despite the roaring waterfall.
117
00:05:33,867 --> 00:05:35,202
Let's check with the judges.
118
00:05:35,269 --> 00:05:37,271
- Dr. Richard Kimble takes home
a score of 27.
119
00:05:37,338 --> 00:05:39,139
He's got to be happy
about that.
120
00:05:39,206 --> 00:05:41,041
- But we remind viewers
he probably killed his wife,
121
00:05:41,108 --> 00:05:43,110
and if you have any information
on his whereabouts,
122
00:05:43,177 --> 00:05:44,645
please call
the police.
123
00:05:44,712 --> 00:05:47,748
I am Cornholio.
I need teepee for my bunghole.
124
00:05:47,815 --> 00:05:50,517
Get the fuck out of here,
Running Joke.
125
00:05:50,584 --> 00:05:53,053
- Man, I'm thirsty.
- Watch this.
126
00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:55,089
Hey, Kool-Aid!
127
00:05:55,155 --> 00:05:57,324
[door opens]
128
00:05:57,391 --> 00:05:59,360
Hey, kids! I'm Silk!
129
00:05:59,426 --> 00:06:01,362
I'm just like milk,
except soy-based,
130
00:06:01,428 --> 00:06:03,964
to prevent nasty
lactose diarrhea!
131
00:06:04,031 --> 00:06:05,699
Oh, hey, Silk!
132
00:06:05,766 --> 00:06:07,935
I'd love a tall, cool glass
of get the fuck out of here!
133
00:06:08,001 --> 00:06:08,969
- B-But --
- Leave!
134
00:06:09,036 --> 00:06:10,003
- But --
- Go!
135
00:06:10,070 --> 00:06:11,205
- But I --
- Split!
136
00:06:11,271 --> 00:06:12,272
Aw!
137
00:06:16,243 --> 00:06:17,711
[groaning]
138
00:06:17,778 --> 00:06:20,013
- Oh, come on!
- I'm sorry!
139
00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:22,249
We can still cuddle, right?
140
00:06:22,316 --> 00:06:23,350
MAN:
Ready!
141
00:06:23,417 --> 00:06:25,386
Aim! Fire!
142
00:06:25,452 --> 00:06:27,154
[ Boom ]
143
00:06:27,221 --> 00:06:28,389
[gurgling ] Ready!
144
00:06:28,455 --> 00:06:30,491
Aim! Fire!
145
00:06:30,557 --> 00:06:32,226
[ Boom ]
146
00:06:32,292 --> 00:06:34,094
Let's never do that again!
147
00:06:34,161 --> 00:06:36,897
Plot a course for "get us
the fuck out of here."
148
00:06:36,964 --> 00:06:39,733
NARRATOR:
There once was a bird with a very happy life.
149
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:42,569
He had a nice nest,
a nice car, hot wife.
150
00:06:42,636 --> 00:06:44,972
But one day he gave
his bedroom door a push,
151
00:06:45,038 --> 00:06:48,475
to see a bird in her hand
and two in the bush.
152
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:51,378
The next day at his job
as a bird on "The Wire,"
153
00:06:51,445 --> 00:06:54,448
he showed up too late, and his
boss said, "you're fired!"
154
00:06:54,515 --> 00:06:56,850
On his drive home,
on the radio feed...
155
00:06:56,917 --> 00:07:00,287
MAN ON RADIO:
The fat pigs on Wall Street have all the seed!
156
00:07:00,354 --> 00:07:03,190
And on the TV,
more menacing words.
157
00:07:03,257 --> 00:07:06,193
This land's for the pigs,
not for the birds.
158
00:07:06,260 --> 00:07:09,062
His nest repossessed
to his family, a stranger,
159
00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:10,798
he felt a new feeling.
160
00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:12,733
Could this be... anger?
161
00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:15,502
He found other birds
with ruffled up feathers,
162
00:07:15,569 --> 00:07:18,205
and said, "if you're mad as hell,
then let's flock together!"
163
00:07:18,272 --> 00:07:20,574
They loaded him
into a gigantic sling
164
00:07:20,641 --> 00:07:23,076
aimed at the palace
of the evil pig king.
165
00:07:23,143 --> 00:07:25,979
He sailed towards the tyrants,
blocking the sun!
166
00:07:26,046 --> 00:07:29,016
The bird revolution
had finally begun!
167
00:07:29,082 --> 00:07:31,885
[ squawks ]
168
00:07:31,952 --> 00:07:34,154
Aw, dang it.
169
00:07:34,221 --> 00:07:35,589
[slurping ]
Yeah.
170
00:07:35,656 --> 00:07:37,858
[grunting ]
[ crackling, muffled yelp ]
171
00:07:37,925 --> 00:07:38,826
Oh.
Oh, man.
172
00:07:38,892 --> 00:07:41,028
[ laughs]
That's hilarious!
173
00:07:41,094 --> 00:07:43,197
Hey, did you ever see
"A Christmas Story"?
174
00:07:43,263 --> 00:07:45,466
[ Muffled, indistinct
speaking ]
175
00:07:45,532 --> 00:07:47,968
Oh, man!
The water main broke!
176
00:07:48,035 --> 00:07:50,637
This wet T-shirt contest is
canceled!
177
00:07:50,704 --> 00:07:52,172
Not so fast!
178
00:07:52,239 --> 00:07:53,807
Hey, Kool-Aid!
179
00:07:53,874 --> 00:07:55,542
Oh, yeah!
180
00:07:55,609 --> 00:07:57,611
You kids made a responsible,
non-alcoholic choice!
181
00:07:57,678 --> 00:07:59,413
Hey! Hey!
What are you doing?!
182
00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:01,381
Oh fuck!
183
00:08:01,448 --> 00:08:03,517
Kool-Aid stains, you dumb
motherfucker!
184
00:08:03,584 --> 00:08:06,353
This is my grandmother's
T-shirt!
185
00:08:06,420 --> 00:08:07,855
NARRATOR:
Thomas the Tank Engine
186
00:08:07,921 --> 00:08:09,756
Was huffing and puffing,
when suddenly --
187
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:10,791
Bust my buffers!
188
00:08:10,858 --> 00:08:12,759
This isn't the way
to the whistling woods!
189
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:14,194
No, it ain't, pal!
190
00:08:14,261 --> 00:08:16,697
Unless the mayor of Sodor
gives me 100 million bucks,
191
00:08:16,763 --> 00:08:18,732
we're gonna drive
this dynamite
192
00:08:18,799 --> 00:08:20,467
right into Knapford Station!
193
00:08:20,534 --> 00:08:22,269
Uh, we've got a problem.
194
00:08:22,336 --> 00:08:24,037
Get me Sir Topham Hatt.
195
00:08:24,104 --> 00:08:25,539
And you...
- [ giggles ]
196
00:08:25,606 --> 00:08:26,773
You come back later.
197
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,342
You know my schedule, dear.
198
00:08:28,408 --> 00:08:31,211
Okay, people.
This is what we trained for.
199
00:08:31,278 --> 00:08:33,313
- [ laughs]
- So immature.
200
00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:35,449
Can we all just stay on track?
201
00:08:35,516 --> 00:08:37,918
- [ laughs]
- Let's just get this bastard!
202
00:08:37,985 --> 00:08:39,987
[train whistle blows ]
203
00:08:42,222 --> 00:08:43,557
Move, move, move!
204
00:08:43,624 --> 00:08:45,626
[train whistle blows ]
205
00:08:53,433 --> 00:08:54,568
Hello, Percy!
206
00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:55,836
Hello, Thomas!
207
00:08:55,903 --> 00:08:58,138
Wonderful weather
for a hijacking, isn't it?
208
00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:02,109
Shut your steam hole
and get closer!
209
00:09:02,175 --> 00:09:04,177
I love being really useful!
210
00:09:07,114 --> 00:09:10,684
You'll never take me alive,
Sir Topham Hatt!
211
00:09:10,751 --> 00:09:12,819
- [screams]
- Missed me!
212
00:09:12,886 --> 00:09:15,589
- [screams]
- Your blows are harmless!
213
00:09:15,656 --> 00:09:17,291
My internal organs!
214
00:09:17,357 --> 00:09:18,292
[ Screams ]
215
00:09:18,358 --> 00:09:20,561
Just finish me, you pussies!
216
00:09:22,029 --> 00:09:23,497
[engine revs]
217
00:09:23,564 --> 00:09:25,832
Conductor to Skywolf.
Request pickup.
218
00:09:25,899 --> 00:09:27,367
Copy that. I'm on my way.
219
00:09:27,434 --> 00:09:30,137
Harold the Helicopter?
You're a part of this?
220
00:09:30,203 --> 00:09:31,104
That's right.
221
00:09:31,171 --> 00:09:34,007
I'm tired of taking a back seat
to a bunch of steam trains.
222
00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:36,410
I can fucking fly!
223
00:09:38,111 --> 00:09:42,049
So long, Topham!
[ cackles ]
224
00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:52,893
Aah! What cruel God would
give a train a face?!
225
00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:57,598
Pump those pistons, you
steam-powered son of a bitch!
226
00:10:02,102 --> 00:10:03,770
Topham! Help me!
227
00:10:03,837 --> 00:10:06,306
I'll turn myself in, I swear.
Just pull me up!
228
00:10:06,373 --> 00:10:09,076
End of the line,
fuckhead.
229
00:10:09,142 --> 00:10:11,311
[ Screams ]
230
00:10:12,512 --> 00:10:13,847
Thank you, everyone!
231
00:10:13,914 --> 00:10:15,582
Knapford Station is safe!
232
00:10:15,649 --> 00:10:17,217
You're quite welcome, Mayor!
233
00:10:17,284 --> 00:10:19,419
And how did you dispose of
the dynamite?
234
00:10:19,486 --> 00:10:21,722
Uhhhh...
235
00:10:30,263 --> 00:10:33,166
Whew!
I've got a lot of work to do!
236
00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:34,301
Toot-toot!
237
00:10:34,434 --> 00:10:35,535
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
238
00:10:35,602 --> 00:10:36,703
♪ Ba-bawk bawk
bawk ♪
239
00:10:36,770 --> 00:10:38,839
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
bawk bawk ♪
240
00:10:38,905 --> 00:10:39,973
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
241
00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:40,974
♪ Ba-bawk bawk
bawk ♪
242
00:10:41,041 --> 00:10:43,143
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
bawk bawk ♪
243
00:10:43,210 --> 00:10:44,211
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
244
00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:45,278
♪ Ba-bawk bawk
bawk ♪
245
00:10:45,345 --> 00:10:47,481
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
bawk bawk ♪
246
00:10:47,547 --> 00:10:49,549
Ba-gawk! Bawk.
16957
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