Original subtitles

interest in some bonus pay?

Yes, sir. I'm definitely interested.

All right. Well, you take a ride with us. It's outside of town.

Junior, you drive.

Hey, that's a nice dick, Ernie.

Now give me four tablespoons of ballin' Memphis guitar.

This gonna taste all right.

That's just a little pinch of organ.

to be a piece of shit or does it just come natural?

Asshole. And where's your sympathy?

They just want the same thing that everybody else wants.

Keep it a fucking pie.

All

right,

maniac, you just follow my lead. Remember, I'm the boss.

You ain't my boss, Junior.

Well, yeah, my daddy's the boss, but technically that makes me above you.

And if I give you an order, you have to do it.

Isn't that right, Daddy? You ain't the boss of shit. Now stop trying to be a

man. Put on these masks. Get in there and take care of business.

Asshole.

This mask smells like shit.

Guess what? Daddy tooted.

Yes, I did.

to tell you again turn it down it's keeping her up making me miss this it's

shows god damn it don't worry margaret not everyone's shut her up

hey bring me a beer for rummaging around this

is empty who the fuck are you

Melody in motion.

Then jump up.

Sorry, sir.

Well, go on. Take a seat. Yes, ma 'am.

Where were you?

I was out running errands.

Errands? Yes, sir. For who?

For the Lord.

Can it, Mary? Both of you.

Enough.

Now lead us in prayer.

Me or her?

I'm looking at you.

So just say me, then. Do it, Eli Gemstone.

Yes, sir.

Good food, good meat, good God. Let's eat.

I'm ashamed.

I stand before you as an old friend and a child of Christ.

Not the deviant sex doer the media paints me as.

I don't know what my family's going to do.

You probably should have thought of that before you filmed your wife doing

cunnilingus on a woman in a dance club bathroom, amen?

Okay, Diane.

Boy, was you fixing the pylon?

You got no compassion for me.

After how long we known each other?

Apparently, I didn't know you as well as I thought I did. A lot of revelations

in this New York Times piece.

Lots of deviants. Yeah, don't you talk deviants to me.

Brothers, sister pastors, Makawan wants a chance to speak.

I think we owe him that much.

We didn't do anything illegal.

Those were private pleasures shared with my wife. And we didn't know we ate

Molly. We thought there were many sweethearts.

Please don't kick my family off your streaming platform, Eli.

We've always been a loyal affiliate.

My church can't survive in this new normal without being on streaming.

I don't know what I'm going to do. We can't be on TV no more. It tanks the

brand.

What message does that send to my congregation?

Mac, now I know you're feeling about as low as a bow -legged caterpillar, but

I'm with Diane.

Estoy de acuerdo.

Mi iglesia está bien con los maricones, pero no estamos listos para swinging y

tropos.

He says his church is really cool with the gays and the queers, but not so much

about the swingers and the thropple.

Dammit, Tony, did he and I not go thropple with this woman?

She's a random with a lifestyle calls a snack.

You think this reporter's just my problem?

He's all our problem.

He's a crusader.

An activist.

You're wrong if you don't think he'll come after you next.

It ain't like I don't have your secrets, too.

Sorry, Mac.

This is not how I wanted it to go down.

So that's that?

I'm gonna kill myself.

for me.

So, don't think I'm not grateful, because I totally get how generous this

all. Really, I do.

But, um... Could I just get an apartment?

This place is kind of... Honestly, Mom, it's super gross.

Yeah, no, doy, it's super gross.

Granddaddy Roy died here. Pooped and peed all over the floors.

But... That was many moons ago. That's right, and we've had this place deep

cleaned multiple times. Right. Your great -granddaddy's mansion is our gift

you for making the right choices.

Mm -hmm. You found a way to use your movie industry tinsel town talents for

good. And not just for good, but for God.

I mean, I'm filming sermons.

It's not quite what I was trying to do.

Oh, it's better. Yeah, it's better.

Ow! What the hell was that?

Stop it!

Hey, Mom, can we kick holes in the walls in the green bathroom? The toilet in

there doesn't even work.

No! You may not.

Me? It's good you don't feel that temper.

Abraham, take that goddamn diaper off your head.

Get up there and straighten those boys out. And if you wouldn't mind, please,

your mother and I would like you to have a talk with Abraham.

What about?

Well,

it would appear that your baby bro has started to jack his little ding -a

And your mama... He's found his stained jockeys in some very odd places. I think

he's embarrassed.

I don't understand.

What's confusing?

He's blasting cum everywhere.

And your mom found his damn undergarments hidden every which way but

found a pair of his crusty child chones in the living room Bible.

And then found another pair stuffed in the back of the freezer where the

dreamsickles are.

I had two of those yesterday.

We all enjoy the dreamsickles. A little dude is up in his room, blasting shit

behind his headboards.

Splash one underneath his little kid desk.

Bottom line, your mom and I are not comfortable talking about cum with your

brother. Low blow combos are more appropriate, we believe, coming from an

sibling as opposed to a mommy's and daddy's.

What am I supposed to say?

I don't know.

Tell him to knock it off. Tell him to put it in a damn napkin and flush it

a normal person.

Don't be field micing this shit around the house. It's disrespectful.

Okay, I'll feel it out, try to bring it up organically.

Thanks. Of course. I got faith in you.

Okay. Bye, guys. Hey, hey. Hey.

Fucking love you, homie. Love you, too.

And I was just playing when I said that Granddaddy Roy pooped and peed all over

the floors. Okay. He didn't do that.

Just the master bedroom.

I'll probably just move into the guest bedroom knowing that about the master.

Whatever you want. Okay. I've got a hidden treasure deep inside of me.

I'm gonna keep it locked cause only one man's got it.

best thing to do.

The book of Matthew tells of nation rising against nation, kingdom against

kingdom, a time of famines, pestilence, and earthquakes.

Sound familiar?

In such scary, uncertain times come diseases, financial ruin, political

That's right, folks, the works, knowing that we can reach God, and he

will answer.

That's what we need right now.

Hold on. Wait a second, Daddy. Are you saying people need Jesus' love now more

than ever?

Duh, my brother. We always need Jesus' love, but especially now. We do need

Jesus' love now more than ever. We are introducing a streaming platform where

you can access Christian programming 24 -7, unlimited, whenever you need it.

We call this service G -O -D -D.

Gemstones on digital demand.

With the launch of G -O -D -D, the gemstones have officially entered the

streaming wars.

Available on smart TVs, Roku, Android, and Apple devices.

Son, you speaking robot?

Can we get that in English for us all to follow?

he's trying to say is you can watch it just about anywhere and it is time to

finally stop the constant flood of filth and propaganda coming out of hollywood

amen and they're gonna fill the airwaves 24 7 with that garbage we gonna do the

same thing that calls for a celebration who wants to sing and rejoice streaming

services

Your peach off to me.

Your peach

off to me.

Your

peach

off to me.

Stick to the salad bar. Don't forget, we are swimming laps after lunch. So eat

light.

We nourish our bodies for his love.

Cool. So cool.

Excuse me, sir.

What's up?

Dismissed.

Will you be dining with the men and I?

Of course not, Keith. I'll be above you upstairs with the family.

Shall I join you?

Oh, not appropriate.

Upstairs church lunch is only for the family.

See you upstairs, Kevin.

And daddy's closest work acquaintances.

Hey, do not take this personal. No matter how many disciples we gather,

still my number one.

All right?

All right?

Let me tickle them titty meats.

See you inside.

I see you.

He tried to kill himself?

Oh, that is horrible.

I just can't believe there was nothing you could do about it. I mean, you

couldn't just tell him that the Butterfields were staying in?

Nothing I could do. Dammit's already been done.

He made his bid.

Sounds like a lot of people need their way into his bed.

Oh, ha -ha, Martin. That fucking reporter ruined their whole life. Like,

their whole deal. I'd feel really sad for them.

Don't let it distract you.

I want to make sure everybody is here for the missionary seminar next week.

Well, Amber and myself will, unfortunately, have to take a rain

been invited to a formal sit -down with the Lithons.

The Lithons? The gorgeous preaching couple from Texas?

Yeah. What for?

What do you mean, what for?

They're a successful, powered Christian couple, as are my wife and I. Who knows

what the hell we can cook up together?

Well, it's just weird that they invited you and not anybody else. Thank you. I

mean, there's a lot of successful people in this family. That's all I'm saying.

If the listeners want to open up a gold gym, I'll tell them to give you a call.

I imagine we were invited because they probably realize as daddy's faculties

waning. And it starts getting older and tighter.

No offense, daddy. That Amber and myself are the logical next leaders.

Y 'all are not the only married people in this family. Me and BJ are also

strongly betrothed and also crushing it. Not a real family.

No kids.

Ooh, slam. I like that one. I don't got time for kids.

Because I'm trying to keep this fresh physique.

Fine. I'm not trying to be all loose and stretched out like Amber's played out

pastrami. Hey, do not talk about my wife vagina at church lunch. Do you hear me?

It's okay, baby. She's just jealous.

Because her wedding wasn't even real.

That was cold.

Not letting daddy walk you down the aisle?

There was not an aisle, dummy. I don't know how many fucking times I need to

that. It was just like an area by ride, okay? Daddy knows.

Disney World was a thing. It was BJ's dream wedding destination.

So we did it Nike style, dog. We just did it, okay?

That's how we roll. We're the seat of our pants.

We're fun kids.

We're whim babies.

So... We meant no disrespect, Daddy.

Oh, Daddy.

I just want to know who officiated the wedding. Was it Donald or was it Goofy?

Ooh, slice.

That was a good one.

It was Prince Eric, for your information.

Thank you. Prince Eric? Who the fuck is that?

The boy from Little Mermaid. The hottest guy in the entire Disney catalog?

It's Ariel's boyfriend, you fucking bitches.

Oh, Lord.

Y 'all went down to Disney World, didn't invite any family to come to your

wedding, and you didn't even get a legacy character to marry you. What

character are we supposed to go for that's better than Prince Eric? Oh, I

know. How about Mickey Mouse?

Stop making... Enough!

Judy, I don't want to discuss the mermaid wedding. Jesse, I'm not going

anywhere. So there's no need to start working on who's taking over. Okay, I'm

just saying, you know, at your age, it's probably never too early to think about

the future. You know, I mean, you could be sitting here being fine one minute

doing church lunch and ministering, and the next minute you can't even wipe your

own shits. And the whole entire church goes down to the caboodles because

knows who's going to run it.

That's where I'm coming from. Well, I appreciate your concern.

But like I said...

I'm not going anywhere.

I'm on my way. Yes, I'm on my way. To the Canaan land. To the Canaan land.

if you don't go. Yes, you don't go. I'll journey on. I'll journey on. I'm on my

way. Good Lord. Now, Job was the richest man that lived in the land of Nod. Good

Lord. He was the only man. Well, let's just hope my campaign plays out a hell

a lot better than I played that back nine. It's about time I took some money

you, Senator.

Since you always seem to have your hands on mine.

Ha! What? Why do you think I let you win?

Hey, maniac kid!

It's me.

Sir. I'm sorry, this is private property. Members only. I'm a personal

Eli Gemstones.

You and me and the man go way back.

I'll see you Sunday service.

Come on. Get your meat hooks off me.

I will fuck you up.

Hey! I can take a hint.

Don't touch me.

You will regret it.

Make some noise!

Oh yeah.

is ready to talk what do you think i think so too lindy question is are you

all ready to listen

inviting our family out here for this little hanging session.

Hey, gemstones rule the east, lintels rule the west.

Why has it taken us this long to combine forces and see what God can do with

this energy?

Y 'all like beach vacations?

Live for them. Waves and sunbeams? Yeah. Well, how would you like to take a

vacation at the beach with Jesus Christ?

I would love to go there.

Okay, well, that's good news, because we got plans to construct a temple of sun

and sand in honor of our love for Christ.

We're calling this place Zion's Landing.

It's a Christian timeshare resort on the sunny beaches of Florida.

Ooh, sounds too good to be true.

Well, pulling something like Zion's Landing off ain't gonna be easy now.

Lindy and I said we got to align ourselves with biggest and the best. I

only pure thoroughbreds.

Well, I appreciate you seeing the gemstones as thoroughbreds. That's

we see y 'all too.

Powerful Christian horses type folks.

I mean, we have waited a long time to get the power from Lyle's mama and

Now that we have it, we're going to do so many wonderful things in his name.

That is so amazing that you say that because we're about to get the reins

Jesse's daddy.

And we want to do things just like this.

Well, pop the champagne. That is wonderful news.

What's your daddy planning on stepping down?

He hasn't really admitted that the time has come yet.

We're getting him there. Close.

Real close.

Eli's parents were the same way. Same generation as Eli.

Boomers. Most selfish generation to ever live.

You said it, girl. They won't get the hell out of the way, even when it's

plan. Okay, let's be real with one another here.

Parents suck.

Yeah. Couldn't agree more.

Parents do suck.

Siblings do.

My sister tried to pop off when Daddy had his stroke.

Tried to act like she was running things. Just because she's a nurse?

told my sister, nuh -uh.

Showed force.

Chased her ass out.

Got my daddy's ass into assisted living.

See, this is the kind of stories I need to hear. Yeah. You gotta marginalize

your siblings.

Firstborns lead the way when parents trip.

Period.

Firstborns. Both of you? Uh -huh.

Both of us? No.

Firstborns. I knew it, I knew it, I knew it. I knew I liked them.

Can we count on your support?

Listen to Gemstones making Christian tourism history.

Praise be.

I'll tell you what.

You got mine and my wife's total support.

Now, technically, we are going to have to run this past my daddy.

Let's bring him on down to the project site.

Yeah. Old Lyle can kiss a parent's ass like nobody's business.

I will butter Eli's balls and toss him a side of biscuits.

He can use some ball buttering.

We'll get his approval.

This maritime force right out. Oh.

There is a small issue with the sea turtles. Apparently, this is a

They don't like bright lights or whatever.

This is people being silly. We'll get past that.

They'll get past that, Daddy. So we're going to put three towers up here.

And between them is where we'll have our splash zone, adult pool, hot tubs,

cabanas. The hot tubs are near where the elephants' hose -down nose are. That's

right. Mark.

And a performance stage.

On the flotilla.

Imagine preaching with that incredible backdrop.

That ain't a set, it ain't a painting, brother.

That is no Thomas Kinkade. That's a real deal right there. God is speaking to us

in these waves. This is his miracle.

That's right, Amber. God's miracle.

A lot of Christians would love to visit a place like this.

Especially if it's all -inclusive, top -notch restaurants and a kids' club.

Come on, now.

Hang on, there's kids allowed here?

Yeah, duh, of course.

I'm not coming then, because that is an ultimate and immediate vibe killer.

Makes it seem dirty, cheap.

I don't know about that.

Kids mean bacteria, no thanks.

I'm not trying to get bacteria on me when I'm trying to be sexy.

Judy, you can say that, but I can imagine our families here helping to

this beauty to all Christians who can afford a two -night minimum.

Two -night minimum means you want a trip.

Legit vacation.

Nobody's doing one -night stands here, Daddy. Wholesome.

Wow.

Well, you've got a fantastic idea here.

Location's perfect.

So what do we say? Are we in? We gonna do this?

It's beautiful.

Yeah.

But no.

It's not the right time for us.

Daddy, how can you say that? You ain't even looked at the numbers yet. I have.

They're good.

A lot of zeros.

I said my piece, Jesse.

But that is a real good deal.

Not your call, Jesse. It's mine.

No, it is. It's my call, too.

Stop showing off in front of your friends, Jesse.

I'm not showing off.

You are.

What was that?

What a

grand waste of time.

Stupid idea.

I don't see any of my shoes.

He's here.

Come on.

Oh, God.

Kelvin, what the fuck is this? Uh -oh, my man.

Ew. You are looking great.

You are looking really good.

Gross,

Kelvin.

Party burpee.

Come on.

One more. Let's go.

Go out of the car. I'll take care of this. I'll talk to him.

Okay, Chad, in the back. You got to work on your form.

All right?

You know we can't say no to this.

I'm actually pretty surprised at how bad you are being at business right now.

Jeff, you know damn well the world has been upside down.

Friends falling all around us. Now ain't the time for growth. It's time to shore

up. Strengthen what we got. Well, I think doing a timeshare resort to

a hell of a way to strengthen up. But we can agree to disagree.

You know, this resort was very important to Amber and I.

And being friends with the listens was also very important.

I'll tell you this much.

When I run this church, I will.

not shun allies when you run the church don't get ahead of yourself boy lyle's

mom and dad knew when it was time to step aside let him have a shot look what

he's doing now making beautiful timeshare resorts in fucking paradise

sorry your life didn't crack out the way you wanted my apologies for still being

alive oh you know what all you ever care about is building this church

cared about that more than being a daddy more than anything Even now, when it's

so painfully obvious, it's time for you just to slow down and let me have a

crack at things. But you won't.

You're going to end up just like Granddaddy Roy.

If you want to start a resort with the listens, go right ahead. Just leave me

out of it.

Wait, so I can do it?

Do what you want.

I can't hear you. There's a fucking beeping.

The other, a wife -swapping swinger by night. Nathaniel, it's safe to say that

for evangelicals, this is a big no -no, right? Yeah, particularly for a pastor

like Reverend Butterfield, who's been outspoken about sexual immorality in the

past. You know, people look to him for spiritual guidance, often tithing 10 %

their income.

These tax -exempt churches rake in millions of dollars a year.

Big money.

Yes, and corruption is a real concern when you're talking about that kind of

money. This grift is as old as Christianity itself.

Look, I've been accused of being anti - religion.

Now, I'm anti -hypocrisy, and there are a lot more hypocrites in this industry.

Butterfield only begins to scratch the surface.

You thought you could duck me, you highfalutin son of a bitch.

What the hell was this?

I followed you. It wasn't too hard with that.

Fancy truck and that personalized plate.

Damn it, Junior.

Oh, so you do remember my name. I thought for a minute that I was so

insignificant to you. Plum Forgotten never existed.

I remember you.

Damn, we got old.

I know I don't like shit, but damn.

You look sturdy. Still got that mask going on.

What do you want?

I just want to see an old friend.

The older I get, the more sentimental I'm leaning.

Nostalgic. And I can't help but thinking about when you and I worked together.

You want money.

You gonna try to blackmail me, sell the story? Let's not waste time here.

Well, I'll never see a lie. Why you being all weird?

You following me, that's weird.

Whatever it is you're trying to pull here, I don't got time for it. Come on,

Eli.

Can't old friends reconnect?

Oh, man.

I'm busy.

Take care.

And me and my old man watched you rise, man.

Yeah, for real.

It was wild to see you come from where we come from and do what you've done. My

daddy was so proud of you.

He acted like he discovered you. I don't mean to bother you. I guess I'd have

thought about you probably more than you thought about me, that's all.

Just wanted to know you done good.

Sorry if I spooked you.

See you around, Eli.

You hungry?

Siblings, I have summoned you here today because Amber and I have won. Through

my powers of persuasion, I have broken Daddy down, and now the writing is on

wall. That old man is on his way out, and I am stepping into power.

Y 'all back me, and I'll give you a good deal. You'll never lead, of course, but

you will be able to keep your homes, your automobiles.

Maintain an annual salary, perhaps even a raise. Oh. All I ask in return is that

you kiss the ring.

What ring?

Your ring?

My wedding ring.

Oh, you're fucking high, dude.

Like, I want to kiss that smelly -ass ring that's probably been shoved up

Amber's pussy.

Oh, it's definitely been shoved up her pussy.

That's why kissing it is so very cool.

Oh. That is foul.

Sick. And boy...

With all the stunts you've pulled, you really think in a million years that

daddy would trust you to run the church?

Keep dreaming.

Yeah. What do you know about anything? All you care about these days is fucking

muscles. Acting like it's about God. It's not. It's about being self

and popping boners. It's about being healthy.

Okay. And if you're healthy, you do maintain a proper erection. That's true.

Whatever. Accept my dominance or don't. Doesn't matter to me. The damn tides of

time and the winds of dust are upon us.

My reign is nigh.

What the fuck did you even just say, man?

That made no sense to me. That sounded foreign. That's not a phrase, dummy.

Oh, Mike.

You're just both a bunch of two -bit, half -rate siblings. Damn Frank Stallone

and fucking Stephen Baldwin over here.

I'm Stephen Baldwin? Yes, you are.

Oh. No, you fucking did not. I ain't got no time for this. Bye, Felicia.

Okay. What did he just say?

No. Did he just say bye, Felicia? Yeah. What does that mean? Bye, Felicia.

Jesse, you will never run this family. So bye, Felicia, to you, Jesse. Who's

Felicia? You are. No, you're Felicia. Let's just all act like adults. You're

Felicia. We can act like adults if he's Felicia because I'm not fucking Felicia.

Felicia? No, you're Felicia. No, it's okay. You're Felicia. He's not Felicia.

Hey. Hey.

I know, I know you're not Felicia. I'm Kelvin, you're Judy, okay? Yeah, I'm

Judy. I know you are. You want a snow cone?

Okay, okay, we'll get you a snow cone.

Get what you want.

I'm buying.

Thank you.

Well, I'm going back and forth between steak and the Alfredo. Well, since

buying, I'm going to take steak.

Get what you want.

Eli, check it out over your right shoulder.

Damn. Look at that piece of tail. He's going

to go

bonely beef on her right here in the sticky Stevens, Eli.

Hey!

You all want to tone down the romance? We got kids sitting right here.

Are you talking to me?

Well, just maybe show your affection in a more appropriate manner.

How about you suck my dick, Ramps?

Randall! Hey, I do whatever the fuck I want, all right? I eat your noodles.

Fucking go back to the movie Cocoon, all right?

Bye. Not trying to offend. Just looking out for the young ones.

Damn. Fucking guy's lucky he's still got teeth.

Just ignore him.

I'm gonna get the Mahi.

You still wrestling?

Nah, I just do character work mostly.

I might step in and talk some shit, but nowadays I'm just promoting.

I got a stable full of fellows I keep working.

Good for you.

That's good.

I wonder what my daddy might think about you and I being united.

Well, he put us together. He'd probably think he'd done a pretty good job

picking two men with so much to offer the world.

He'd try and take credit.

Yeah, he would.

Yeah, he would.

You know that son of a bitch who skipped town on me one day?

Left me with nothing.

Just up and disappeared.

Disappeared.

Imagine that.

Your own daddy dislikes you that much.

Don't look at it that way, Junior. That ain't gonna help you none.

I like to think that he made his way down to Bolivia.

That's what he said Butch and Sundance did.

They didn't die like in the movie.

No, they got to Bolivia and lived out their lives.

I like to think that's what he did.

Find himself a beautiful and dignified senorita and lived out his life down

there.

Yeah.

You know, some people think I killed him.

Enough of that.

I don't need to sit here drifting while you're...

Sitting there looking all uncomfortable.

Nonsense. Connecting with the past is a powerful thing.

Let's pray, Junior.

Oh, Eli.

No offense.

I ain't religious.

Well, it's a good thing I am.

I'll show you what to do.

Let me see them hands.

Heavenly Father, thank you for bringing old friends together.

Please help Junior heal from the past.

Even though we don't understand why we endure the pain we do, and we trust that

it is your will, we are at your mercy, and your mercy

shall redeem us.

Amen. Amen.

Damn.

Kind of nice.

I ended up beating him.

So we can do the hotel with you.

We're in.

And we're also excited to be a hotelier with you.

Lakes, JG.

Oh, baby, it's so fucking good. I'm going to do an Adderall to celebrate.

I don't love it, but you wrote a great email, so I'll give you my bless.

Where's the littlest son we have who's been coming on things?

Are you boosting?

Come on, Pont, just say you're better than this. Pont, you're getting laughed

right now. Well, he's got the better car. Are you not using the nitrous or

something? I didn't know there was a nitrous.

Gideon.

Come here for a second.

I'll talk to you real quick.

Sure.

What's going on?

Did you talk to your brother like I asked you to?

Because I just found this in my pens drawer. The fuck? Gross.

What is that?

These Jesuit boys' delicates. Your brother stuffed this in my damn pens

I touched it with my bare fingers. Why did you touch it? Why didn't you talk to

him like I asked you to? I tried. I swear to God, I tried.

I could not figure out a way to bring it up, man.

You want to be a preacher, don't you?

Huh? Shut up, you do. And if you're going to be a preacher, you've got to be

able to talk about anything, all right?

Even if it makes us uncomfortable.

We stopped doing that.

When people burn in hell, watch and learn.

You want me to come in there with you? Yes. Okay.

Sup, sup, guys, little men, what's up?

Sup. Sup.

Glad you said sup first, Pontius, because I need you to take the computer

goggles off your face and exit for a moment, please. I'm in the middle of a

game. I'll play your turn. Get up right now. Take a hike.

Remember you said again, okay? Don't make me get mad at you.

Abraham. Here's the trip, Gil.

Do you need help?

What did he do to it? Did he break it? He's got to get out of there.

Shit. You got to put one in there. I got it, I got it.

Would you go ahead and hit pause on the game system there, Blood?

I'd like to rap with you for a second if I could.

Why were your delicates crammed in my pants drawer, Abraham?

It's not what you think.

Seems to me it's exactly what I think. It's crusty and crinkly and discolored.

I mean, you're just inside your room, I guess, having nocturnal emissions all

day long, okay? From the amount of garments I've found stuffed around this

house, it's very disrespectful.

Neighbor here, let me ask you a question. Do you know what really

boy does the stuff to himself to make the cum stuff into the underwear?

When those hands of yours touch your privates, an alarm goes off in heaven.

Okay, and every loved one you've ever known that's dead, they are alerted,

float to where you are, they join hands, and they watch you.

Be dirty to yourself.

Like Grandma?

Yep, she watches. Great Granddaddy Roy, Great Grandmama, even some relatives

you've never even met before, like ancient ones from the Revolutionary War

times. Ghosts that will watch you and be ashamed.

of what you're doing to yourself, of how you're being dirty and provocative to

your private parts.

You understand?

When people see you do something bad, it's hard for them to see you any other

way. I want you to remember that.

Yes, sir.

Now, are there any other questions you have for me, birds and bees, morning

woods, speckers, anything that you want to discuss or ask me about?

Well, there is one thing that I'm...

Still curious about.

Are we still doing that hotel thing?

Yes,

my son.

We are now officially hoteliers.

Oh, granddad said yes?

Of course he did. He knew he couldn't stand in my way.

Yeah, your granddaddy ain't half the shit kicker he used to be.

Mercy, I guess he does do whatever he wants. Okay, bye.

You have terrific tits. Thanks for the cheese enchiladas.

Chew balls, scratching a corner pocket.

Bet you two queefs haven't seen action like that in years.

Next time, keep the comments to yourself.

We don't want any trouble, friend. You made your point.

That's what I thought, bitch.

Don't want to run your mouth, huh?

How dare you talk to us like that, you big old slab of meat. Come on, Junior.

No.

No. You don't know who you're messing with. Jesus.

We're from fucking Memphis, asshole.

We still twink like you full of rocks and sink you in the midst of fucking

sippy. You know, you're lucky I don't murder you right fucking now or send

of my badass friends to go do it. Find your fucking house, slay your whole

fucking family. How about that, asshole?

Come on, Junior.

Well, that's what I'm going to do.

I'm going to take a photograph of your license plate with my telephone, send it

to my friends who can get your address from DMV, come to your house, and fuck

you up, you motherfucker.

Who?

Junior!

Oh, my God.

Junior!

Junior! I hope you're wearing your diapers, old man.

Come on, you didn't have to do that.

Stay down there and drool, doggy.

Finish him off, maniac.

Take him down.

Yeah! Yeah!

Do it again.

Come on, maniac.