Original subtitles

[music playing]

- Eastman Kodak company is happy to bring you

America's favorite family, the Nelsons--

Ozzie, Harriet, David, and Ricky.

They enjoy good times together.

And like most of us, they enjoy good times over

again in pictures.

And now, here's Harriet.

- You know, Christmas is only a matter of weeks away,

and that means it's time for us to pick out

the picture we'll use for this year's Christmas photo

greeting card.

All we have to do is pick out the snapshot

we like best, either in black and white or color.

And then, we'll have our Kodak dealer make it

into a photo greeting card.

A photo greeting is a Christmas card only you can send.

This style is called the slimline,

and it comes in either full color or black and white.

There are lots of other styles too,

but you better hurry so you can get your cards in the mail

early.

- And here's good news.

This year, many photo dealers have an attractive Christmas

offer.

For example, when you buy 25 or more Kodacolor prints

of the same picture, your Kodak dealer

will supply prints, folders, and envelopes

all at a very substantial saving,

so be sure to take your Christmas snapshot

and have your Christmas photo greetings made soon.

And now, Kodak invites you to enjoy "The Adventures

of Ozzie and Harriet."

[saw blade cutting wood]

- Hi, Joe.

- Hi, Oz.

It's good to see you.

- Oh, I just thought I'd drop by and see what you're up to.

I haven't seen much of you since you started this woodworking.

- Yeah, I guess I have been spending a lot of time

out here.

- Oh, Harriet wants to know is there

anything you want us to bring over to your party tomorrow

night?

Besides ourselves, that is.

- No, I don't think so.

In fact, you don't have to come over, Oz, just as long

as Harriet shows up.

- It doesn't work that way.

If you want Harriet at the party, you've got to take me.

It's a package deal.

- That's what I was afraid of.

- What are you making here besides sawdust?

- Oh, nothing right now, just trying out this new blade.

Here, you want to try it?

- Oh, no thanks.

- Sure, go ahead.

- No, you know me.

I'm all thumbs, and I've grown kind of fond of them.

- Well, aren't you going to ask to see what I've made?

- Oh, I'm sorry.

I'd like to see what you've made.

- It's right over here.

Oz, you're the first one I've shown it to.

Besides Clara, of course.

- Well, let me see it.

- Oz, you understand this is the first thing I've ever made?

- Yeah, I know, and I like to see it.

- What do you think?

- Yeah, it's very nice.

- You really like it? - Oh, sure.

It's--

- It's an end table.

- Well, that's what I had.

- Feel how smooth it is.

- Oh, yeah, that's a nice finish.

- It's really well put together, too.

I doweled the legs and tongue grooved the joints here.

- It's amazing.

- You don't think the scrollwork is too much.

Do you?

- Oh, no, that's what makes it interesting.

What are these holes here?

- I was afraid you weren't going to ask me.

It's a little idea of my own.

Here, I'll show you.

It's a built-in pipe rack.

- Well, that's very clever.

- Oh, thanks, Oz.

I think furniture should be functional as well

as ornamental. Don't you?

- Oh, yeah, it's a beautiful job.

- You really like it? - Oh, yes.

- Now, you're not just saying that?

- No, no, it's well-constructed.

It's interesting.

And it's functional, as you say.

It should make a nice conversation piece.

- Oh, thanks, Oz.

How would you like to have it?

- What? - No, I mean it.

It's yours.

I want you to have it.

- Well, I don't--

well, I don't know what to say.

- Well, don't say anything.

I'm just glad you like it.

- Well, yes, of course, I like it.

But after all, Joe, it's the first thing you've ever made.

I don't know.

You keep it, but thanks just the same.

- But, Oz, you're my best friend.

I want you to have it.

- Well, and I appreciate it.

- Let's just call it an out-of-season Christmas

present.

- I don't know what to say, Joe.

- You better take it, Oz, before I change my mind.

- Gee, well, thanks a lot.

Boy, wait'll Harriet sees this.

- Let me know what she says.

- Well, thanks again, Joe.

- Bye, Oz.

- Bye.

Hi.

- What's that?

- It's an end table.

- Where did you get it?

- Joe made it.

- Hey, that's not bad.

- Well, I think it's pretty darn good for a first effort.

- What are you doing with it?

- Well, he gave it to me.

- For keeps?

- Yeah.

- Well, give it back.

- I can't do that.

- Well, how do he happen to give it to you?

- Well, he asked me how I liked it, and I said fine.

And first thing I knew, he'd given it to me.

You know how it is when somebody asks you, how

you like something he's made?

You can't very well say, "I don't like it."

- Oh, well, no, of course not.

It's really not bad.

- No, it's sturdy.

It's well-built. It'll probably lasts forever.

- What are the holes for?

- Oh, it's a built-in pipe rack.

It'll make a nice conversation piece.

Well, what could I do?

- Oh, nothing.

I was just wondering where we could put it.

- Well, we'll find some place for it.

- I still don't know why he had to give it to you.

- He just said I was his best friend,

and he wanted me to have it.

Sort of an out-of-season Christmas gift, he said.

- Well, we'll say something.

- Merry Christmas.

- Try it over there by that chair again.

- It's no use.

It looks just as bad over there as it does every place else.

- Well, do you want to try it in the living room again?

- Well, to be honest with you, I'm

a little tired of lugging this darn thing all over the house.

- You haven't tried the attic.

- We can't put it up in the attic.

Suppose Joe comes over here?

Be terribly embarrassing if it isn't out someplace

where you can see it.

- Yeah, I suppose so.

- Hey, we haven't tried it in the kitchen.

Maybe I could put spoons or something in those holes.

- Oh, no, these are for pipes, like this.

- Maybe you can use that as an excuse to take it back.

- Well, he'd just make bigger holes.

Here's an idea.

Why don't we put it right here?

- Oh, I don't know.

- Well, it has one advantage.

When we open the door to let people in,

they won't be able to see it.

- I suppose you could leave it there

till we decide what to do with it.

[doorbell ringing]

- Oh, hi, Oz. - Hi, Oz.

- Hi, Doc.

- Hey, you got a new table. - Oh.

- Thought you guys might like to play a little golf with us

today.

- Oh, well, thanks a lot. Maybe next week.

I've got quite a few things I have to do around the house.

- Did you see this, Darb?

- Oh, that's very nice.

You make that yourself, Oz?

- No, Joe Randolph made it and gave it to me.

- No kidding.

Well, he sure did a nice job.

- Yeah.

Move it out here where I can see it a little better.

- It's his first effort.

I think it's pretty good.

- Oh, I think it's darn good.

- And look at all that fancy work there?

Hey, what are all those holes for?

- That's quite an interesting feature.

That's a built-in pipe rack.

- That's pretty clever.

- Yeah, how come he gave it to you?

- Well, I don't know.

I admired it, and he gave it to me.

Hey, do you guys really like this?

- Oh, sure.

Don't you, Doc.

- Oh, I think it's great.

Are you sure Joe made this?

- Oh, well, yeah, he made it out in his garage.

Say, we're having a little difficulty

finding a place to put it to show it to its best advantage.

Maybe one of you guys would like to have it.

- Oh, thanks, Oz, but I don't think so.

- It's very well-constructed.

- Oh, yeah, I can see that.

And I'd really love to have it, but I

don't think that would be fair.

- No, Doc's right, Oz.

After all, Joe gave it to you.

- Well, I know, but you guys know him just as well as I do.

- Yes, but you've known him longer than we have.

- Well, no, we all met him at the same time.

Don't you remember?

- Yes, but you were introduced to him first.

- I don't recall anything like that.

- Well, if we're going to play some golf, we better get going.

- See ya, Oz. - Bye, Oz.

Beautiful table.

- Are you sure?

- What are you doing?

- I found it.

- Good, what is it?

- It's that painting I made when we attended those art classes.

- I thought you threw that away.

- No, I saved it, and I'm glad I did.

- Why, for goodness sake?

- For just such an occasion.

- Oh, you've lost me.

- I'm going to give it to Joe Randolph.

- Oh, you mean to get even?

- You wouldn't let me hang this anyplace

where anybody could see it, would you?

You can be honest with me.

- In that case, no, I wouldn't.

- And Clara wouldn't let Joe hang it any place.

- No, I don't imagine she would.

- Well, there's your answer.

I'm going to give it to Joe, and if he refuses it,

back goes his end table.

- Suppose he takes it?

- Well, fine, then he'll have to hang it someplace,

which he'll never do.

He'll probably just hide it somewhere.

And if he hides this, then we can

hide that monstrosity of his.

- May I compliment you on a brilliant scheme

well thought out?

- Well, thank you.

Frankly, I think I deserve it.

- Well, hi, Oz. Come in.

- Hiya, Joe.

- What do you got here?

- Well, it's a little painting I made.

- Hi, Ozzie. - Hi, Clara.

- What's that?

- Well, it's a little out-of-season Christmas gift.

Joe gave me one, so I thought I'd give him one.

- Oh, isn't that nice.

- Why don't you take it in the other room and look at?

I think the light's a little better in there.

Well, what do you think?

- Oh, it's very interesting, Oz.

- It is.

- You really Like it?

- Oh, yeah, it's a real professional job.

It'll make a wonderful conversation piece.

- Oh, well, thank you.

- I've always wanted a genuine, handmade oil painting.

- Oh, well, you got one now.

Where are you going to put it?

- Oh, well, I don't know.

You just don't slap a thing like this up on the wall.

- Of course not.

- You've got to figure out the right place

to put it to do it justice.

- Oh, well, if you don't mind my making a suggestion, how

about up on the mantel there?

- Oh, well, that's an idea.

- Yeah, well, I'd better be running along.

Nice to see you, Clara.

Merry Christmas, Joe. - See ya.

Thanks again.

- Dinner almost ready?

- Almost.

I say something funny?

- I was just thinking about Joe and Clara

when I gave him the painting.

You should have seen their faces when I suggested

they hang it over the mantel.

- Oh, you didn't.

- Well, I didn't make a big point of it.

They probably spent the rest of the afternoon

trying to figure out what to do with the darn thing.

- Oh, well, don't look now, but here he comes

and he's got the painting with him.

- Well, I have to give him credit.

He's more honest than I am.

- Either that or the picture's even worse

than you thought it was.

- Hi, Joe. Come on in.

- Hi, Oz. Hi, Harriet.

- Hi, Joe.

- Oz, I don't want to hurt your feelings--

- Look, Joe, I understand.

I'll take the painting back.

- You will not.

- Well, isn't that why you came over here?

- Heck no.

I just wanted you to see the frame I made for it.

How do you like it?

Took me all afternoon.

- Oh, how about that.

- You like it, Harriet?

- Oh, yes.

- After all, if we're going to hang it over the mantle,

we want to show it to its best advantage.

- Oh, well, yeah, sure.

- Well, I don't want to keep you from dinner.

I just wanted you to see the frame.

- Oh, it's very nice.

- Oh, don't forget you're coming over

for the party tomorrow night.

- Oh, sure, we're looking forward to it.

- Oh, well, yeah, we'll be there.

- You know, Oz, I don't like many paintings,

but there's something about this one that's really nice.

- Oh, well, thanks a lot, Joe.

- Bye now. - Bye, Joe.

- So long.

- Way In the corner like that with a lot of magazines on it,

you might not even notice it.

- I suppose.

It's ridiculous.

How could my painting be any good and look so bad to us?

- I don't know.

- Well, then why does Joe want it?

- Well, maybe he's got a hole in the wall he wants to cover up.

- You heard him.

They're going to hang it over their mantle.

- You know, it's just possible that he's telling the truth

that he and Clara really like it.

- Harriet, I find that kind of hard to believe.

Well, no matter how bad the painting is,

he still got the best of the bargain.

- I don't know.

The more I look at that table--

yeah, you're right.

It's pretty bad.

[phone ringing]

Oh, I'll get it.

Hello?

Oh, hi, Darb.

Yes, he's here.

It's for you, Picasso.

- Hi, Darb.

- Oz, I just want you to know I saw the painting,

and I'm speechless.

I just don't know what to say.

- Well, it's one of the first things I ever did.

- I know it.

That's what makes it so amazing.

- Well, you mean you like it?

- I think it's great.

- Did you really paint it, Oz?

- Well, yeah, but I don't think it's especially good.

It might be a little unusual, but you know as well as I do,

it's pretty amateurish.

- Oz, you're just being modest.

- No, in fact, as I recall, I was half kidding

when I painted it.

- Well, I don't know about that, but I certainly

think you've got a wonderful overall effect.

How come you gave it to Joe?

He doesn't appreciate artistic things.

- Well, he likes the painting.

- Yes, but he doesn't understand it.

- Well, I don't know.

I think he does, at least he seems to.

- Then, why is he inviting the art critics to his party?

- Art critics?

- Oh, gee, I guess I wasn't supposed to tell you.

Well, so long, Oz.

- No, no, wait a second.

- Oh, I better hang up. I've said too much already.

I'll see you at the party. Goodbye.

- Uh, Darb?

Darb?

Harriet, did you hear that?

- No, you were holding the receiver too close to your ear.

- What's going on?

- What do you mean?

- Well, I don't know whether Darby's got me on or what.

- Well, knowing Darb, he probably has.

- I don't know.

Maybe he hasn't.

- You know, it might help if I knew

what you were talking about.

- The art critics.

- He's got you on.

- No, he wasn't supposed to tell me.

It just slipped out.

- See, Joe is going to have some art critics at the party

tonight. - What for?

- Well, to look over my painting and to explain it or something,

I guess.

- Oh, for goodness sake.

- Well, if he thinks he's going to make a laughing stock out

of me in front of all those people,

he's got another thing coming.

- You can't have it back, Oz.

- Well, why not?

- Because it belongs here.

Look at what it's done for this room.

It's brightened it up to such a point

that Clara is beginning to say the furniture looks shabby.

- Well, you're wasting your time, Joe.

I'm on to you.

- What do you mean, you're on to me?

- Well, I know all about the art critics

you've invited to your party.

- Oh, gee, I wanted that to be a surprise.

- Well, fortunately, I found out about it.

Now, give me the painting.

- You can't have it, Oz.

- Well, you're not going to make a laughing stock out of me

in front of all my friends.

- What are you talking about, Oz?

I'm trying to convince you that the painting is good.

- Joe, you're talking to the guy who painted this thing.

- The artist who painted it.

- OK, the artist who painted it.

- Do you think any artist is able to appraise his own work?

Do you think that Whistler realized

he was painting a masterpiece?

Or Rembrandt?

Or Leonardo da Vinci?

- Well, what's all that got to do with this thing?

- Well, I'm not saying that you're in their class,

but it is darn good, Oz.

And I don't mind telling you that I

might be proud of myself.

It took me to recognize it.

- Well, OK, thanks a lot.

- People just don't realize their own talent.

Now, take that table of mine, for instance.

Frankly, I didn't realize it was so good until you

took such an interest in it.

- Well, well, OK, I'll see you later.

- Oh, sure, Oz.

Between 7 and 7:30 tonight, that's

when we're going to have the unveiling.

- Look, Joe, why don't we stop all this nonsense

and give me back the painting?

- Absolutely not.

This is the first time I've owned an original work of art,

and I'm going to keep it.

- OK.

It's not bad enough he's invited these art critics, whoever they

are, but now he's going to unveil

the thing as if we're a national monument or something.

- What are you so worried about?

- Well, I just don't like to be laughed at,

unless you think there's a possibility

that the painting really is--

- I don't think so.

- I wasn't going to say a masterpiece,

but that it's passably good in some strange way.

- I don't know.

Did the teacher of the art class say

it was interesting or something?

- Well, yeah, I think he did, but you

know how it is, that they all like to give you encouragement.

What was his name?

Do you remember?

- Dexter, wasn't it?

- Yeah, that's right.

Maybe I ought to go over there and ask him about it.

- Well, it won't do any harm.

- Yeah, I think I will.

- No, I'm afraid.

I don't remember the painting, Mr. Nelson,

but I remember your dropping the pallet face down

on the floor over there.

- Oh, yeah, that made quite a mess.

Didn't it?

- Well, we managed to get most of it off.

Are you interested in some more lessons?

- No, I came down to ask you about the painting.

I thought you might remember it.

- You say it was a landscape?

- Well, yeah, that is it started out to be a landscape.

See, there was a stream, and the sun

was shining through the clouds.

I remember there was a little fence there and a kind of a boy

fishing.

- What do you mean, "kind of a boy"?

- Well, see I spilled a little paint in the stream.

That is, where I was painting the stream.

And I kind of smudged it, and it looked like a boy.

So I filled it in.

- Well, what did I say about the painting at the time?

- Well, you were nice enough to say it was very interesting.

- Then I must have thought it was.

I'm always honest with my students.

- Oh, thank you.

Yes, I realized that.

- Mr. Dexter?

- Yes?

Pardon me just a moment.

- Is this coming along OK?

- Oh, yes.

Say, hey, that's very interesting.

- Thank you.

- Well, I think I'll be running along.

I'm sorry to have troubled you, Mr. Dexter.

- Not at all.

Nice to see you again, Mr. Nelson.

Sorry I couldn't help.

- Oh, that's OK.

Thanks just the same.

- If you get a chance, come on down

and attend some more classes.

- I may do that.

- Oh, that's fine, Jenkins.

Very interesting.

Very interesting.

Very interesting.

- Well, I'm sure he wouldn't have said it was interesting

if he hadn't thought so.

- Well, I hope you're right.

You making the cake for the party tonight?

- Yes, I thought I'd surprise them.

- I hope they aren't too surprised by my painting.

- Oh, well, don't worry about it.

Here, I have complete confidence in your artistic ability.

- You really want me to gush on there?

- Oh, anything appropriate for the unveiling of a major work

of art.

[laughter]

- That's descriptive of my state of mind.

- Oh, hi, Harriet. - Hi, Clara.

- You're just in time.

- I baked a cake for the party.

- You shouldn't have done that.

- Hi, Harriet. - Hi, Joe.

- Where's Oz? - Oh, he's outside.

He's trying to make up his mind whether to come in or not.

- Oh, for goodness sake, Oz, come on in.

We're all waiting for you.

- Hi, Joe.

- You're holding up the proceedings.

Oz is here, everybody.

- Well, hi, Oz.

- Shall we have the unveiling before dinner?

- Oh, sure, I think--

- Oz, since it's your painting, I

think you should do the honors. - Well, no, no, you're the host.

Go ahead, Joe. - Don't be so modest--

- Oh, come on, Oz.

- For you folks who haven't seen this,

I'm afraid you're in for a disappointment.

It's just a simple little painting.

- Oh, come on, Oz.

Pull off the sheet.

- Well.

- Ah.

- How about that, folks?

Isn't that the most beautiful frame you ever saw?

- What's this all about?

- I figured the other frame was too plain.

- The frame? What about my painting?

- It's perfect, Oz.

Just the right size for the amount of wood I had.

- You mean you wanted my painting just for your frame?

- Oh, no.

Well, that is not entirely.

But naturally, you can't show off a frame

unless you have a picture to put in it.

- What was all this about the art critics?

- Where are they?

- They're right here.

- Doc and Darbs?

Since when are they art critics?

- Just a second, Oz.

Darb is a man of infinite good taste,

and my hem stitching is the envy of every intern

at the hospital.

- It's nice.

When you come right down to it, we're all art critics.

Everyone's entitled to his own personal opinion.

Folks, I want to call your attention

to the detail of this scrollwork.

- The more I look at it though, I--

pardon me please, folks.

I'm not at all sure that picture's right for that frame.

- Oh, well, it's just tacked in there.

I can take it out very easily.

Excuse me, please.

Doc, Darb, what do you think?

- Well, just a second, Joe.

I want to take another look at this painting.

- What do you think, Darb?

- It's not bad.

In fact, it's darn good.

- I think the colors are just beautiful.

- I love the way the sun is shining through the clouds.

- I'm really quite proud of this scrollwork.

- Please, Joe.

- You know that looks so restful there, Oz.

Where is it?

- Oh, it's no place in particular.

I just made it up.

- Really?

I could have sworn I've seen that stream, and those trees.

- Well, I guess everybody has seen a stream like that

at some time or another.

- It used to be one like that on my grandmother's farm.

I used to love to wiggle my toes in.

It was so nice and cool.

- Yeah, these new power tools are really something.

- Take a look at the expression on that kid's face.

You just know he's playing hooky, right, Oz?

- Oh, well, it could be.

- He looks just like my cousin Walter.

He's a dentist in Kansas City.

- You know what I think?

I think the boy is a symbol.

He represents the desire we all have to escape from reality.

- Yes, but he's catching a fish.

I think he represents man's struggle for survival.

- No, I think the boy represents youth watching

the stream of life go by.

- How about it, Oz?

Who's right?

- Well, actually, all I did was try and paint a happy picture.

- That's the same thing I had in mind when I made this frame--

something happy, and gay, full of life.

- I hate to break this up everybody, but dinner's ready.

[indistinct chatter]

- I'm glad they liked your painting so much, dear.

- Oh, thank you.

- You know, it is good.

- Oh, well, it's nice of you to say so, but it really isn't.

It's just that they're such good friends

and such wonderful people.

They wanted it to look good, and so it looked good to them.

- Well, then that's even more important.

- I guess it is.

- Well, come on, Joe. Dinner's ready.

- Yeah, I know.

You know, Oz, that really is a darn nice painting.

- Oh, thanks a lot, Joe.

- And this is a beautiful frame.

- Oh, thanks, Oz.

It's just the right size for the picture.

- Let's try it over here again.

It really does something for the picture.

It gives it an added dimension.

Tell me truthfully, Oz, just what

did you have in mind when you started out to paint this?

- Well, I said to myself, why don't I paint a picture.

Then if a crazy neighbor of mine gets some power tools

and decides to make a frame, he'll

have a picture to put it around.

- Come on, you guys.

Even artists have to eat, you know?

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