Original subtitles

As a special TV offer, you

get a genuine one-point

diamond ring,

plus a 14-karat gold necklace,

plus a beautiful heart-shaped pendant.

All for only $19.95.

Impossible, but wait, there's more.

No, there isn't. Morning, Mr.

Belvedere. Good morning.

Morning. Morning, sir.

Mr. Belvedere, is this your day off?

Oh, no, ma'am. Is there

anything you'd like? Yeah, breakfast.

Oh, I haven't even begun to prepare it.

I presumed you would eat when

you got home. From where?

Services.

Services? Who died?

George, it's Sunday.

Oh. I am sorry. In tidying

up the drawers, I came across

a church bulletin from your

good shepherd of Beaver Falls.

And I assumed. Oh, and we do go.

It's just that, uh...

We're not fanatics about it. I see.

It's just that with things

being so crazy the

past couple of months, we

haven't gone as frequently as

we should.

Perfectly understandable.

but now that you're here and

we have the time there's

really no reason why we

shouldn't go right honey it's Sunday

I got your clubs dad where

you want me to stick them

hey honey guess what

We're all going to church.

It's not Easter.

Again, I apologize for

the misunderstanding.

Uh-huh.

It's just that I've only been

here a few days

and I haven't quite gotten

used to your routine.

Hey, it's okay.

We didn't have any plans anyway.

Well, have a good worship.

Thanks.

Say a little prayer for me. I will.

You're gonna need it.

Street on the Chinas, never

mattered before, who cared?

When you drop kicked your

jacket, as you came through

the door, no one bled

But sometimes things get

turned around and no one spared

All hands look out below,

there's a change in the status quo

Gonna need all the help that we can get

According to our new arrival

Life is more than mere survival

We just might live a good life, yeah

He's such an embarrassment

I think I'm aware of that

Hey, don't worry about it, partner

Anybody could have spilled

that collection plate

down some lady's dress that

was great there must have

been over $20 with a

change in there you get a

change I've never seen a fat

broad jump like that

Mom, I didn't start it.

We'll talk about it later.

Mr. Robadare, all I did was

ask where there weren't any

dinosaurs on Noah's Ark.

I wanted that myself.

Yeah, well, this kid in the

next pew starts laughing at me.

I don't care what he did.

You don't hit someone over

the head with a hymnal.

I was blessing him.

Regardless, breakfast will be

ready in 15 minutes. Thank you.

Hey, come on, champ.

Let's get out of these monkey

suits and go out and fire

the old football around.

Pop Warner's coming up. Sure, Dad.

I'll be right there.

Add up, baby.

What you watching, aerobics?

It's Le Corsaire by Adolphe Adam.

It's a ballet.

Oh, yeah, we don't watch that

sort of stuff.

Ah.

How come you like it?

The same reason your father

likes watching his sporting events.

It's fast-paced, colorful,

emotionally engaging,

and there aren't any beer commercials.

They're just dancing.

Hey, look at that guy jump.

He looks like Dr.

J. That guy is Lieutenant Berbanto,

and the jump is called a cabrio.

It's a very difficult maneuver.

Yeah, well, if he's so great,

why isn't he with the Celtics?

Because he chose to dance.

It requires the same skills,

stamina, and strength

as any of your professional sports.

Wow, look at him spin around.

That is called a pirouette.

Think I could do something like that?

I don't see any reason why not.

If you were to practice and

have discipline,

you could be on your toes in no time.

Oh, yeah?

Whoa, now he's sliding across

the floor.

What's that called?

A mistake, Wesley.

Hey, Mom, Mr. Belvedere said

I could learn ballet.

Hey, Brancho, what's the holdup?

Coming, Dad.

Get up, baby.

That kid's a natural.

Heather?

Yeah, Mom?

I'm going over this phone bill.

Do you know anything about

that 1-900 number?

Yeah, it's a Drandran hotline.

I love it.

Well, you must have called it 15 times.

That's almost $10.

I thought it was free.

Well, it isn't, and I think that $10

may just come out of your

allowance, young lady.

But I need that money for

birth control.

I'm kidding.

Mom, I'm kidding.

God, she's so tense.

Be a parishioner cop for home.

Hi, Mom.

How was class, honey? Oh, great.

We learned a lot of neat new stuff.

I hope you're minding your

plies and jetés.

Yeah, I can do all that stuff.

By the way, we're gonna get

to see it Friday night. We are?

Yeah, they're having recital,

and I'm in it. Oh, my.

Guess you're gonna have to

tell Dad now, huh?

Possibly.

Come on, Mom, he still thinks

I'm playing football.

You can't keep lying to him.

I'm not lying.

Your mother is simply telling

your father

or a slightly edited version

of a small part

of the approximate truth.

Right.

Yeah, well, it's making me crazy.

Dad keeps asking me, is he

looking good out there?

Is he rushing?

Is he blitzing?

I'm getting an ulcer.

Yeah, remember the time Dad

got home before we did?

I had to stay outside and

roll around in the dirt.

Look, honey, you know Dad.

Sports mean everything to him.

He played them all through school.

He writes about them for a living.

He just has a hard time

dealing with anything that

isn't athletic.

I'm athletic!

Yes, I know. I didn't mean

athletic in the athletic sense.

I meant athletic more in the, uh...

Cro-magnon sense?

But the point is, we are

going to tell him.

Promise?

Dad's home. I'm home.

Galley slippers.

Give me those. Hi, Dave.

Oh, hi, honey. Hi, Dad.

Hey, Wes, look what I got for you.

Great.

You're going to have to tell

him sometime.

I know.

I just thought Wesley would

lose interest

after a couple of lessons, and there'd

be no reason to upset George.

Well, in thinking about it, I don't

think you're giving Mr. Owens

enough credit.

Go on.

What I mean is, if you tell

George how Wesley came about

it, how much he's enjoying it,

and how well he's doing at

it, I think George might

understand and accept it.

Right.

Of course, I'd appreciate it

if you'd leave my name out.

You guys seen your father?

Well, I think he's upstairs.

Want me to go get him?

Oh, no, no.

Okay, I'm sure he'll be down

when he'll be down.

Aren't these Belly's slippers?

Uh-huh.

I found them hanging on my

shaving mirror.

I didn't do it.

You mean they're not yours?

Sure they are.

Yeah, yeah, they really are, Dad.

I mean, you don't even have

to ask her to try them on or anything.

George, they're not Heather's.

Whose are they? Hey, Dad.

Hey Wes. I think you can tell him now.

Ballet.

Ballet.

George we were going to tell you.

How nice.

So how long has he been taking ballet?

Oh not even much

more than a month. A month.

So all this time when I

thought he was out playing

football he's been doing

twirls down at the tutu farm

stupid old dad George I'm

sure if you just took a

moment oh anything else you

want to tell old pop

huh Heather's still in school

hey Kevin you married or

anything any kids

Sir, I think I'm partially

responsible for this.

It's Belvedere, isn't it?

This is your fault.

Well...

George, that's not fair.

Now, I was the one who said

it was okay.

Yeah, and I took him to class.

I helped him pick out his

ballet slippers.

It's still your fault.

Is, uh, everything okay?

sure pal so I see you traded

in your spikes for a pair of

toe shoes yeah I'm

getting pretty good yeah I

bet you are then you come in

Friday night heck yeah

I wouldn't miss it for the

world great what the hell is

Friday night you

You wanted to speak to me, sir?

Yeah.

We were watching television.

I don't want to hear it.

OK.

You know, when my wife and I

decided to hire a domestic,

I had a certain picture of

what that person would be like.

She would be plump and

pleasant, wear an apron,

keep mostly to herself, and

just kind of

be around when we needed her.

You know what I had in mind? Yes, Mrs.

Buttersworth.

What I don't need is some

front man for the ball shoy

putting crazy ideas in my kid's head.

Look, sir, I admit that I

did introduce Wesley to the ballet,

but it was his decision, a

laudable one, if I may say so,

and I think he deserves

everybody's encouragement and support.

It's good we can talk like this.

Come on, Dad, we're going to

miss a recital. Everybody's waiting.

Wait a minute.

Dad, that clock doesn't even work.

It doesn't?

Let me get my tools.

Come on, Dad, you're stalling.

I am not. All right.

All right.

Come on, Dad, it won't be that bad.

I mean, it can't be any

worse than those sports banquets

you drag us to.

Hey, those are fun.

No, they're not.

Boy, I can't believe we made it.

Yeah. Dad must have stopped

for gas three times.

Come along, sir.

We must keep...

I'm coming, I'm coming.

I don't know what the big hurry is.

I'm glad you made it. I was

getting worried.

We're here.

Wesley's very excited.

Yeah.

Well, it's gonna start in a

couple of minutes.

I saved us some seats down front.

Great.

I'm gonna go get something.

Would you like some tropical punch?

Got anything harder?

Brownies.

Thanks.

I'd rather be at a penguin's

game myself.

You got that right.

But I can't miss my little princess.

I know what you mean.

Hey, I'm Jack Sorrell. Um, George.

So how about your daughter?

Huh?

She must be pretty excited.

Yeah, she is.

Shhh, start it.

Check out Prince Valiant,

there's a guy that rides side-saddle.

Alright, this guy's putting

the make on her, I really believe that.

Here comes another one, and

young, this kid doesn't have a chance.

Which one's yours?

One of those over there.

Why is Cindy's the one next

to Tinkerback?

Cute.

Tink made kind of a nice

move there, huh?

Sort of a little fruit loop.

Fruit loop.

Tears your heart out, don't they?

Soon.

Actually,

if you let his hair grow a little bit,

you'd make a pretty nice girl.

That's my son.

I...

My son. You're kidding.

His name is Wesley.

It's not Prince Valiant.

It's not Fruit Loop.

And it's not Tinkerbell. And he's

doing a hell of a job up

there and I'm proud of him.

And you open your fat

mouth one more time, you're

gonna be dancing in Never Never Land.

Sorry folks.

You kids keep going. Hit it.

Sorry, guys.

Sweet Georgia Brown.

Take me out to the ball game.

Take me out to the crowd. Oh, sir.

Yeah?

I had a noise.

I thought perhaps we had,

uh, squirrels.

Well, getting a head start

with the spring cleaning?

Yeah, I'm thinking of getting

rid of a lot of this junk.

You know, Wesley was very

proud of your outburst this evening.

Yeah, he's a good kid. See this?

Yes.

The day Kevin was born, I

had this ball autographed

by everybody on the pirates.

Bill Maslerosky, Danny

Murtaugh, Roberto Clemente put

in his crib with him, hoping

that something

might rub off.

Willie Stargell did, but

things never really worked out.

I see.

I mean, Kevin tried hard

enough, but he kept falling

down, getting hurt.

I had to stop him for his

mother's sake.

Well, he has a good heart.

Yeah, but with Heather being

a girl, Wesley was pretty

much my last shot.

You know, at a trophy or something.

Is a trophy so important?

I don't have one of my own.

Mrs. Owings made me believe

you were quite the old American.

I could have been.

If I'd have had a little

more speed and agility, I'm talented.

Yes, that might have helped.

I guess the apple doesn't

fall too far from the tree.

Not necessarily.

You must never give up hope. Why not?

Well you never know what fate

and chance may bring.

Ballet today, backfielder tomorrow.

You may be surprised.

You think so?

Yeah, take me for instance.

When I was a youngster I did

practically nothing

but practice the bassoon.

It wasn't until long after

that I developed my

animal-like passion for long bowling.

I'm going back downstairs. See ya.

Ah, that's the George I know.

At any rate, the boy seems

to be progressing quite well

with his lessons.

And even George is taking a

more active interest.

He had a number sewn on the

back of Wesley's leotard.

Oh, a footnote.

The events of the last few

days have reawakened in me an

interest I thought I'd long

since forgotten.

Hey, knock it off!

Sure!