Original subtitles

Todd's cool.

Yeah, yeah.

Todd's cool.

Hey, what are you two girls looking at?

Hey, but he noticed us.

Yeah.

Just at least try to act cool, Beaver.

I hope they have a hospital in your kindergarten, man. Because if you don't

looking at me, that's where you're going to end up.

Well, he did it again, but he's talking to us.

Of course.

All right, that's it. I warned you.

Hey, how's it going?

Well,

I'd love to stay and kick your asses some more, but my shifting hand is

to hurt.

She sure is cool.

Yeah, yeah.

Hey, Beavis.

Let's follow him and find out how come he's cool.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

And then we can become cool too.

Yeah.

Whoa, hey. Hey, that's it.

That's his car.

Oh, yeah.

This is cool.

Yeah, yeah.

This is gonna be cool.

Whoa.

God.

Whoa.

Hey.

Hey, how's it going?

We're like your friends.

We're like in your gang and stuff, you know.

Like, you know, we hang out and stuff like that, you know. It's pretty cool.

Whatever.

This rules.

Beva, this is the coolest thing that has ever happened.

Well, uh, Todd.

Since we're like friends.

This is cool.

Can you tell us how to, like, you know, get chicks to do it?

Yeah, that's a good question. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on, tell us.

Roosting, man.

You gotta... Take your bike and have it.

Grab it and... Grab it and then... All right.

And then you got her, man.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

See? See, that's what I've been telling you about it.

It's like, you gotta take her bike.

and then drive her real slow, you know what I'm saying?

Beavis, you dumbass, that's not what he said.

So, I mean, so, Todd, where are you supposed to take her bike?

What? Dammit, Beavis, shut up.

So, uh, Todd, like, what's your secret for buying beer?

Yeah, yeah, beer's cool, too, yeah.

You can tell us. You're among friends now.

Oh, man, it's easy, man.

You go to this place, and you gotta, um,

Give him, like, tiger nachos, and then, woo, oh, you're out of luck, man, and

oh,

oh, and then all that.

Really?

So all you gotta do is, like, go give him some tiger nachos?

I would have been buying beer every day if I knew that.

Dammit, Beavis, shut the hell up. What the hell kind of... Stupid, wuss,

dumbass, wuss crap are you talking about? Who the hell is saying

I think you should listen more closely to what Todd said.

Like, um, that's what he said.

Yeah, so, um, well, Todd, how can we get cool like you?

It's just guys.

It's like, it's Bergen and Finger and... Beavis.

Yeah? Damn it, Beavis, don't make me kick your ass. All right, that's it.

Hey, cut it out!

What the...

What the

hell are you little turds doing here?

We're like your best friends.

Yeah, that's what you said.

What the... Man, I... Kick your asses if I didn't have such a headache.

Look, if I ever catch you too near me again, you're dead.

And if I find out you told anyone I talked to you, you're twice as dead.

Damn.

How does somebody get to be so cool?

Todd.

Proud to present Kenosha, Wisconsin. This is like some show, right?

Of course it is, Buck Munch.

It's on TV.

Oh, yeah.

No, but I don't think this is a video.

They don't play many videos anymore.

It's all like shows and like people snowboarding and stuff.

I think this is happy days.

Yeah.

Crappy days.

He's funny about that.

Happy Dave.

He called it crappy Dave.

One,

two, three, four.

Yeah.

We're going to do it.

We'll take it.

We'll break it.

We're not going to make it. All we need is just a little patience.

Yeah.

I like the show better when that other dude on the restaurant, that dude from

Karate Kid.

Oh, yeah.

He's got no fun. His answer comes from inside you. Always right.

Yeah.

That dude could kick Fonzie's ass.

Fonzie doesn't even know karate.

These dudes were always, like, calling each other nerds and stuff.

Yeah, I wonder why.

I think it was like...

Back in the old days, before they invented words like mad and butt munch

dumbass. Yeah, yeah.

Things are a lot better now.

Yeah.

Butt munch. Yeah.

You know what else they're always saying?

They're always saying, like, sit on it. Sit on what?

You have a pretty cool show.

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