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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,446 --> 00:00:05,982 What's going on? What's going on? 2 00:00:06,048 --> 00:00:08,518 Could you just sign this for me, man? 3 00:00:08,584 --> 00:00:10,429 Could you hit that up for me, please? All right, sure. 4 00:00:10,453 --> 00:00:12,431 I would be an honor, and I can't wait to display it. 5 00:00:12,455 --> 00:00:15,091 You know, this is a yanni cd, right? 6 00:00:15,158 --> 00:00:18,528 Yeah. I-I don't see the problem. 7 00:00:18,594 --> 00:00:20,196 Hey, yo... 8 00:00:32,008 --> 00:00:33,376 Let's just get this started. 9 00:00:33,443 --> 00:00:35,044 Are you kidding me? 10 00:00:35,111 --> 00:00:36,479 Who's a good cat? 11 00:00:44,320 --> 00:00:46,823 Narrator: With special guest, method man. 12 00:00:46,889 --> 00:00:50,760 This is going to be "a whole" lot of fun. 13 00:00:54,197 --> 00:00:56,117 Today we're working at the Liberty science center 14 00:00:56,165 --> 00:00:57,967 as scientists, and we've hired 15 00:00:58,034 --> 00:01:01,304 some new assistants to help us in the lab. 16 00:01:01,370 --> 00:01:02,672 While working with our lackeys. 17 00:01:02,738 --> 00:01:05,374 We'll have to do and say what we're told. 18 00:01:05,441 --> 00:01:07,710 And if you refuse, you know what happens. 19 00:01:07,777 --> 00:01:09,612 You lose. 20 00:01:09,679 --> 00:01:11,314 A volcano. 21 00:01:15,718 --> 00:01:18,888 All right, murr, we're in. 22 00:01:18,955 --> 00:01:21,224 "Atmosphere." 23 00:01:21,290 --> 00:01:22,992 Oh! 24 00:01:23,059 --> 00:01:24,393 Yeah. 25 00:01:24,460 --> 00:01:26,295 You don't want to know what happens 26 00:01:26,362 --> 00:01:27,730 if you cross the laser. 27 00:01:27,797 --> 00:01:29,975 You have to show your assistant where that laser beam is, 28 00:01:29,999 --> 00:01:31,901 and then you have to avoid it at all times. 29 00:01:31,968 --> 00:01:36,172 You are my assistant today. There is a laser here. 30 00:01:36,239 --> 00:01:38,241 Watch. Watch. You see it? 31 00:01:38,307 --> 00:01:39,442 See it? 32 00:01:39,509 --> 00:01:41,577 Don't let him pass that laser, buddy. 33 00:01:41,644 --> 00:01:43,045 Don't cross the laser. 34 00:01:43,112 --> 00:01:44,456 You have to go underneath it, okay? 35 00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:45,615 That's it. 36 00:01:45,681 --> 00:01:47,450 Make him go back and forth a bunch of times. 37 00:01:47,517 --> 00:01:49,886 Oh, you know, grab a lab coat for yourself right over there. 38 00:01:49,952 --> 00:01:53,356 There you go. Very good. 39 00:01:53,422 --> 00:01:55,091 Okay, just watch that. 40 00:01:55,157 --> 00:01:56,726 Get under there. Get under there. 41 00:01:56,792 --> 00:01:58,461 Oh, you know, grab the green gloves 42 00:01:58,528 --> 00:02:01,097 that are over there, too. Watch that. Very good. 43 00:02:01,163 --> 00:02:03,299 Oh, you know, let's grab the thing 44 00:02:03,366 --> 00:02:05,735 with the green cap on it. Be careful there, okay? 45 00:02:05,801 --> 00:02:08,971 Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Very good. Close, but we we got it. 46 00:02:09,038 --> 00:02:11,040 Okay, great. 47 00:02:11,107 --> 00:02:13,109 Okay. So welcome to my lab. 48 00:02:13,175 --> 00:02:14,844 So this is a particle accelerator. 49 00:02:14,911 --> 00:02:16,279 Come on over. What do you do? 50 00:02:16,345 --> 00:02:20,182 My next job is a Dean for a high school. I got a job... 51 00:02:22,351 --> 00:02:25,121 We have a soundboard here that controls that female voice. 52 00:02:25,187 --> 00:02:27,657 You know, the computer has detected a lie. 53 00:02:27,723 --> 00:02:30,159 That is the truth, though. 54 00:02:30,226 --> 00:02:33,563 It's a really incredible system. 55 00:02:33,629 --> 00:02:35,698 It is myself constructed and designed. 56 00:02:35,765 --> 00:02:37,233 It is the... 57 00:02:37,300 --> 00:02:39,669 Well, I didn't build it. Mit built it. 58 00:02:39,735 --> 00:02:42,004 They just lent it to me. 59 00:02:42,071 --> 00:02:43,172 All right. 60 00:02:44,807 --> 00:02:46,342 Thank you, computer. It's tonight. 61 00:02:46,409 --> 00:02:48,678 It's every other Sunday. 62 00:02:48,744 --> 00:02:50,513 Can I say something? 63 00:02:50,580 --> 00:02:52,848 I am a virgin. 64 00:02:52,915 --> 00:02:54,083 Ohh. 65 00:02:54,150 --> 00:02:55,518 I just wanted to... 66 00:02:55,585 --> 00:02:57,887 No. It got it right! 67 00:02:59,488 --> 00:03:00,599 When you tried to lie to the ai, 68 00:03:00,623 --> 00:03:02,458 it called you out on it. It knows. 69 00:03:02,525 --> 00:03:04,093 For example, I am a virgin. 70 00:03:04,160 --> 00:03:06,829 For example, I am a virgin. 71 00:03:11,667 --> 00:03:13,402 When I was a virgin, 72 00:03:13,469 --> 00:03:15,237 I've always wanted to give it a try. 73 00:03:15,304 --> 00:03:20,376 But losing it is nothing special. Having it... 74 00:03:20,443 --> 00:03:22,445 You're saying that I'm not missing much 75 00:03:22,511 --> 00:03:24,447 by being a 45-year-old virgin, 76 00:03:24,513 --> 00:03:25,982 not at all, honestly. 77 00:03:31,854 --> 00:03:33,689 One second. Sorry about that. 78 00:03:35,091 --> 00:03:37,560 Hey, are you the yellow lamborghini outside? 79 00:03:37,627 --> 00:03:39,195 Yes, it's me. 80 00:03:39,261 --> 00:03:41,530 We have an ambulance that we need to bring in. 81 00:03:41,597 --> 00:03:42,832 No, you can't. 82 00:03:46,168 --> 00:03:48,168 These particles aren't gonna accelerate themselves. 83 00:03:48,204 --> 00:03:49,739 I'm sorry. 84 00:03:49,805 --> 00:03:52,508 Well, they will accelerate themselves. 85 00:03:52,575 --> 00:03:55,478 But I have to be here to monitor the particles. I can't... 86 00:03:55,544 --> 00:03:58,014 Oh, I don't have to witness what we do, computer. 87 00:03:59,315 --> 00:04:01,117 We control the fan from right here. 88 00:04:01,183 --> 00:04:02,985 Let them move around it. I'm not mov... 89 00:04:03,052 --> 00:04:04,387 Jeez. Oh! 90 00:04:06,422 --> 00:04:08,391 James. James, hurry up. Get these. 91 00:04:11,827 --> 00:04:15,398 I'll be honest. I don't give a shit about the ambulance. Fair enough? 92 00:04:15,464 --> 00:04:17,433 There you go. I'm not moving it. 93 00:04:19,802 --> 00:04:21,213 Murr, walk out, and when you walk past the laser, 94 00:04:21,237 --> 00:04:23,439 just zap and drop to the floor. 95 00:04:23,506 --> 00:04:24,306 You want to get out of here? 96 00:04:24,373 --> 00:04:27,576 Take the lab coat off. 97 00:04:27,643 --> 00:04:30,146 And, you know, one last thing I did want to tell you is... 98 00:04:30,212 --> 00:04:33,015 Aah! 99 00:04:33,082 --> 00:04:35,551 James: Sir? 100 00:04:35,618 --> 00:04:38,487 Computer, what happens if you get hit by the laser? 101 00:04:40,890 --> 00:04:42,491 This is base to lab, base to lab. 102 00:04:42,558 --> 00:04:44,960 Is everything okay? We had a trigger on the laser. 103 00:04:45,027 --> 00:04:46,862 Everyone's not okay. 104 00:04:46,929 --> 00:04:48,197 Dr. Murray, is that you? 105 00:04:48,264 --> 00:04:51,701 No, I am James, the assistant. 106 00:04:51,767 --> 00:04:54,103 Are you a virgin? 107 00:04:54,170 --> 00:04:56,038 No. 108 00:04:59,175 --> 00:05:01,444 If there are any pink liquids in a tube, 109 00:05:01,510 --> 00:05:03,412 just pour it on his face. 110 00:05:03,479 --> 00:05:05,648 I see the pink liquid. 111 00:05:05,715 --> 00:05:07,683 He crawls under the laser! 112 00:05:10,352 --> 00:05:13,589 I love him. I actually love him. 113 00:05:19,261 --> 00:05:22,064 Great Caesar's ghost! Did I walk into the laser? 114 00:05:22,131 --> 00:05:23,632 Yes, you did. 115 00:05:23,699 --> 00:05:26,702 Murr, hit the laser again. 116 00:05:26,769 --> 00:05:29,205 Aah! 117 00:05:35,878 --> 00:05:37,480 Murr: All right, buddy. 118 00:05:37,546 --> 00:05:39,348 When your lab assistant walks in, 119 00:05:39,415 --> 00:05:40,726 I want you to greet her immediately 120 00:05:40,750 --> 00:05:42,694 and say, "ah, you must be the girl from the agency. 121 00:05:42,718 --> 00:05:44,553 Enter, enter. There's very little time." 122 00:05:46,555 --> 00:05:49,024 Ah, you must be the woman from the agency. Yeah. 123 00:05:49,091 --> 00:05:51,036 Oh, great. Come in, come in. There's very little time. 124 00:05:51,060 --> 00:05:52,394 Okay. Okay. 125 00:05:53,829 --> 00:05:56,198 Murr: "You are familiar with science, aren't you?" 126 00:05:56,265 --> 00:05:57,867 You are familiar with science, right? 127 00:05:57,933 --> 00:05:59,435 Of course, yes. 128 00:05:59,502 --> 00:06:01,704 I trust you have all your affairs in order. 129 00:06:01,771 --> 00:06:04,907 I trust you have all your affairs in order? 130 00:06:04,974 --> 00:06:05,975 Yeah. Okay. 131 00:06:08,010 --> 00:06:11,013 What's your kidney sitch? You got one or you got that extra one, too? 132 00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:12,615 What is your kidney situation? 133 00:06:12,681 --> 00:06:13,992 You have one, or you have the extra? 134 00:06:14,016 --> 00:06:18,020 I have all two normal. 135 00:06:18,087 --> 00:06:19,364 Sal, she looks a little nervous. 136 00:06:19,388 --> 00:06:22,892 Just keep insisting to her that you're not gonna hurt her. 137 00:06:22,958 --> 00:06:24,426 Okay, I want you to know right now, 138 00:06:24,493 --> 00:06:25,670 I mean, it'll be a lot of fun today. 139 00:06:25,694 --> 00:06:26,872 I'm not gonna hurt you... Nothing like that. 140 00:06:26,896 --> 00:06:29,131 Mm-hmm. 141 00:06:29,198 --> 00:06:31,000 Mm-hmm. 142 00:06:32,968 --> 00:06:35,671 Keep emphasizing that you're doing this all for your family. 143 00:06:35,738 --> 00:06:38,150 Everything that I do here, and this is important for you to know... 144 00:06:38,174 --> 00:06:40,476 Everything I do here... 145 00:06:40,543 --> 00:06:42,178 it's for my family. 146 00:06:42,244 --> 00:06:44,013 Oh. 147 00:06:45,514 --> 00:06:48,150 Print all of the elements that begin with "a." 148 00:06:48,217 --> 00:06:49,852 She's now your experiment. 149 00:06:49,919 --> 00:06:51,487 Mumble everything she's doing 150 00:06:51,554 --> 00:06:53,889 just loud enough that she can hear it. 151 00:06:53,956 --> 00:06:57,159 Okay, subject appears to be over 30. 152 00:06:59,195 --> 00:07:02,431 The subject did not notice the needle jab. 153 00:07:02,498 --> 00:07:07,903 The subject did not notice the needle jab. 154 00:07:09,805 --> 00:07:13,175 Any moment, the subject's transformation will be complete. 155 00:07:16,712 --> 00:07:21,517 At any moment, the subject's transformation 156 00:07:21,584 --> 00:07:23,419 shall be complete. 157 00:07:27,923 --> 00:07:30,059 Murr: Sal, you're scared of everything on that table. 158 00:07:30,125 --> 00:07:32,328 These are deadly, deadly liquids. 159 00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:36,899 If you just take... Just take that. 160 00:07:36,966 --> 00:07:38,367 Yeah, that's it, that's it. 161 00:07:38,434 --> 00:07:40,736 This could blow at any moment, bud. 162 00:07:40,803 --> 00:07:44,106 Look at how carefully she's handling it. 163 00:07:44,173 --> 00:07:47,176 Ethel, now you just take that... 164 00:07:47,243 --> 00:07:49,311 And just sat down next to it. 165 00:07:50,679 --> 00:07:52,147 So here's what we're gonna do. 166 00:07:52,214 --> 00:07:54,083 You're gonna take the red one. 167 00:07:54,149 --> 00:07:57,419 Yeah, you can take that red one, the red one, 168 00:07:57,486 --> 00:08:00,923 and then just pour that red one into the larger one. 169 00:08:00,990 --> 00:08:03,359 Ethel, try very hard not to breathe. 170 00:08:03,425 --> 00:08:05,794 Just try hard not to breathe. 171 00:08:05,861 --> 00:08:07,263 Ooh. 172 00:08:09,531 --> 00:08:12,268 Yeah, sal, every time she pours the liquid, run away. 173 00:08:12,334 --> 00:08:13,802 Take that. 174 00:08:13,869 --> 00:08:15,004 Okay. 175 00:08:15,070 --> 00:08:18,507 Yeah, sal. Hide. 176 00:08:23,279 --> 00:08:24,513 It's all for my family, Ethel. 177 00:08:24,580 --> 00:08:25,991 It's all for... this is all for my family, Ethel. 178 00:08:26,015 --> 00:08:27,449 Everything I do is for my family. 179 00:08:31,387 --> 00:08:33,989 So, I just, here at the Liberty science center, 180 00:08:34,056 --> 00:08:37,526 just happen to be working on an interdimensional portal. 181 00:08:37,593 --> 00:08:40,262 There's gonna be there's not a single ounce of credibility 182 00:08:40,329 --> 00:08:42,231 during this turn at all. 183 00:08:42,298 --> 00:08:45,100 Hi! I'm here! 184 00:08:45,167 --> 00:08:47,803 Siobhan. 185 00:08:47,870 --> 00:08:48,938 I'm a scien-tits. 186 00:08:49,004 --> 00:08:51,674 I'm a scien-tits. Um... 187 00:08:51,740 --> 00:08:53,943 Ready for this? Yes. 188 00:08:54,009 --> 00:08:55,544 Yeah. This is gender fluid. 189 00:08:55,611 --> 00:08:58,314 You know what that is? That's... that's gender fluid. 190 00:08:58,380 --> 00:08:59,420 Have you heard about that? 191 00:08:59,481 --> 00:09:01,550 No. Yeah, that's gender fluid. 192 00:09:01,617 --> 00:09:02,918 Yeah. 193 00:09:05,154 --> 00:09:08,157 Yeah. 194 00:09:08,223 --> 00:09:10,693 So let's try... Let's see what we can do. 195 00:09:10,759 --> 00:09:13,662 Okay, there's smoke coming out. Q, what is going on? 196 00:09:13,729 --> 00:09:16,074 Murr: Type furiously to activate the interdimensional portal. 197 00:09:16,098 --> 00:09:16,432 Sal: Someone's coming in through the portal of another dimension. 198 00:09:16,966 --> 00:09:19,635 What is going on? 199 00:09:19,702 --> 00:09:22,471 Hey, what is your name? 200 00:09:22,538 --> 00:09:24,073 My name is Brian gunk. 201 00:09:24,139 --> 00:09:26,108 Well, my name is Brian gunk. 202 00:09:26,175 --> 00:09:27,843 Q, that's a better-looking version of you 203 00:09:27,910 --> 00:09:29,078 from another dimension. 204 00:09:29,144 --> 00:09:31,213 You're me? 205 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:34,183 What happened, dude? What happened to this? 206 00:09:34,249 --> 00:09:36,352 We used to have this. 207 00:09:36,418 --> 00:09:38,287 Did McDonald's run the country? 208 00:09:38,354 --> 00:09:39,989 All right, all right, all right. 209 00:09:40,055 --> 00:09:42,391 I'm still a fireman in my dimension. 210 00:09:42,458 --> 00:09:44,760 You're a scientist-fireman in your dimension? 211 00:09:44,827 --> 00:09:47,997 Yeah, I study fire. Pyrokinetics. 212 00:09:48,063 --> 00:09:49,531 You still fight fires? 213 00:09:49,598 --> 00:09:51,033 No. I used to fight fires. 214 00:09:52,668 --> 00:09:54,737 Look, I got lives to save. 215 00:09:54,803 --> 00:09:57,172 Pleasure. Try to give a shit again, huh? 216 00:10:00,509 --> 00:10:03,145 I can just assume from this point on 217 00:10:03,212 --> 00:10:04,947 that we're just gonna have all sorts 218 00:10:05,014 --> 00:10:06,915 of interdimensional shenanigans. 219 00:10:06,982 --> 00:10:08,584 Q, I think the only thing left 220 00:10:08,650 --> 00:10:10,095 is for you to go through the time portal. 221 00:10:10,119 --> 00:10:11,596 I'm going to try going through the portal. 222 00:10:11,620 --> 00:10:13,355 Are you gonna take this journey with me? 223 00:10:13,422 --> 00:10:14,990 Sure. Yes. Yeah? 224 00:10:15,057 --> 00:10:17,926 All right, let's start this machine up. 225 00:10:17,993 --> 00:10:20,295 All right, q, run around outside the building 226 00:10:20,362 --> 00:10:22,097 and come back in the other way. 227 00:10:22,164 --> 00:10:24,633 Sal: So stupid. Here we go. Here we go. 228 00:10:24,700 --> 00:10:26,535 Whoa! 229 00:10:26,602 --> 00:10:29,571 Siobhan. Siobhan deserves a medal. 230 00:10:29,638 --> 00:10:33,108 Keep hitting the spacebar! Keep hitting the spacebar! 231 00:10:35,010 --> 00:10:36,445 What year is it? What year is it? 232 00:10:36,512 --> 00:10:38,580 What year is it? 2022. 233 00:10:38,647 --> 00:10:41,984 2022 still?! 234 00:10:43,852 --> 00:10:47,356 You could hear him running and huffing and puffing. 235 00:10:47,423 --> 00:10:49,858 He's all tattered up. 236 00:10:49,925 --> 00:10:51,427 I went back to dinosaur times. 237 00:10:54,163 --> 00:10:55,964 You think... You buying any of this? 238 00:10:56,031 --> 00:10:57,031 Yeah. 239 00:10:59,735 --> 00:11:02,304 Narrator: The guys had it down to a science, 240 00:11:02,371 --> 00:11:05,741 keeping them all off the loser board. 241 00:11:05,808 --> 00:11:07,776 We have been waiting so long to get this lesson. 242 00:11:07,843 --> 00:11:09,745 Okay, well, you know, it has to be tight. 243 00:11:09,812 --> 00:11:11,022 You know, you're dealing with stems, 244 00:11:11,046 --> 00:11:12,781 sticks, seeds... Things of that nature. 245 00:11:12,848 --> 00:11:15,684 You're rolling it like that? Tight? 246 00:11:15,751 --> 00:11:17,453 I mean, that is the most beautiful flower 247 00:11:17,519 --> 00:11:18,763 I've ever seen in my entire life. 248 00:11:18,787 --> 00:11:20,823 I agree. 249 00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:22,758 Well, I mean... 250 00:11:22,825 --> 00:11:23,592 Right? 251 00:11:23,659 --> 00:11:25,494 And you make that from this? 252 00:11:25,561 --> 00:11:27,329 Yes. 253 00:11:27,396 --> 00:11:29,231 Today, we are participating in a group survey, 254 00:11:29,298 --> 00:11:32,034 where our survey answers have been written by the other guys. 255 00:11:32,101 --> 00:11:33,769 But this time we'll be swapping surveys 256 00:11:33,836 --> 00:11:35,104 with the other participants. 257 00:11:35,170 --> 00:11:36,505 We'll be reading their answers, 258 00:11:36,572 --> 00:11:38,207 and they'll be reading "our" answers. 259 00:11:38,273 --> 00:11:40,342 Now, normally the goal is to not laugh, 260 00:11:40,409 --> 00:11:42,177 but today it's gonna be even harder. 261 00:11:42,244 --> 00:11:44,746 The goal is not even to smirk. 262 00:11:44,813 --> 00:11:46,582 We're counting any facial movement, 263 00:11:46,648 --> 00:11:48,951 and whoever smirks the most loses. 264 00:11:51,487 --> 00:11:52,588 Sal and Charlie? 265 00:11:52,654 --> 00:11:53,655 Sal, Charlie, yeah. 266 00:11:53,722 --> 00:11:55,757 Okay. Very nice to meet you, gentlemen. 267 00:11:55,824 --> 00:11:57,159 Murr: So sharron is the moderator. 268 00:11:57,226 --> 00:11:58,627 She's our inside person. 269 00:11:58,694 --> 00:12:00,596 Sal is gonna read Charlie's answer. 270 00:12:00,662 --> 00:12:02,764 Charlie's gonna read sal's answers. 271 00:12:02,831 --> 00:12:04,199 Sal cannot laugh. 272 00:12:04,266 --> 00:12:06,168 Can you guys swap your binders? 273 00:12:06,235 --> 00:12:08,213 Sometimes it's nice to hear from a different perspective 274 00:12:08,237 --> 00:12:10,405 your own words. - Good luck with this, sal. 275 00:12:13,375 --> 00:12:15,744 Sal, I want you to read Charlie's answer for us. 276 00:12:15,811 --> 00:12:18,814 "I dress to fit in, not stand out." 277 00:12:18,881 --> 00:12:21,416 Yeah, that's... yeah. 278 00:12:21,483 --> 00:12:22,784 Charlie, let's read sal's answer. 279 00:12:22,851 --> 00:12:25,120 "How do the things you wear affect who you are?" 280 00:12:25,187 --> 00:12:27,422 "Sometimes the things I wear are wet, 281 00:12:27,489 --> 00:12:29,391 and that makes me wet, too." 282 00:12:32,995 --> 00:12:33,995 One. 283 00:12:37,633 --> 00:12:39,010 Sharron: Let's hear sal's answer, Charlie. 284 00:12:39,034 --> 00:12:43,505 "I hit my brother with a pipe over a monopoly dispute, 285 00:12:43,572 --> 00:12:46,441 and now his tongue doesn't sit right." 286 00:12:48,410 --> 00:12:49,730 We were doing a Reno in the house. 287 00:12:49,778 --> 00:12:52,915 There was a pipe nearby. I didn't mean it, but I hit him. 288 00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:54,592 I hit him in the mouth with a pipe, and, uh... 289 00:12:54,616 --> 00:12:55,918 Murr: I headed right to jail. 290 00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:57,419 I-I... 291 00:13:03,859 --> 00:13:05,294 Can we get sal's answer on that? 292 00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:07,329 Murr: Here we go. 293 00:13:07,396 --> 00:13:11,700 Planes bad. Computers bad. Fire bad." 294 00:13:14,136 --> 00:13:17,606 Fire buried wouldn't be bad." 295 00:13:17,673 --> 00:13:18,907 He's gone. Sal's gone. 296 00:13:18,974 --> 00:13:20,454 Yeah. We knew he wasn't gonna win this. 297 00:13:26,048 --> 00:13:28,283 Okay, so, Charlie, we'll go with you first. 298 00:13:28,350 --> 00:13:29,484 Baba booey. 299 00:13:32,521 --> 00:13:34,423 Yeah, that's your answer? 300 00:13:34,489 --> 00:13:36,225 Is he actually crying? 301 00:13:36,291 --> 00:13:39,728 He's crying. 302 00:13:39,795 --> 00:13:42,798 Just say, "fire bad." 303 00:13:46,768 --> 00:13:48,403 Fire bad. 304 00:13:48,470 --> 00:13:50,339 Baba booey. 305 00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:57,012 I'm gonna ask that you swap binders. 306 00:13:57,079 --> 00:13:59,615 Q, if you laugh or smirk, you lose. 307 00:14:02,951 --> 00:14:05,554 Anna says, "critical thinking as a tool, 308 00:14:05,621 --> 00:14:08,457 as opposed to a standardized test category is a must." 309 00:14:08,523 --> 00:14:09,925 Let's hear Brian's answer. 310 00:14:09,992 --> 00:14:12,461 "Lunches, baby. Give me that pizza. 311 00:14:12,527 --> 00:14:14,830 Give me that burger. Give me that little milk carton. 312 00:14:14,896 --> 00:14:16,498 Gimme, gimme, gimme." 313 00:14:17,833 --> 00:14:19,868 Sal: It looks like you have heartburn right now. 314 00:14:24,473 --> 00:14:27,409 "If you have to burp in public, burp into your shirt, 315 00:14:27,476 --> 00:14:30,045 then blow it down your belly." 316 00:14:30,112 --> 00:14:31,480 Murr: That's a smirk. 317 00:14:31,546 --> 00:14:35,183 "Don't interact with anyone wearing anything UN-American." 318 00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:36,250 Sal: Oh, my god! 319 00:14:37,185 --> 00:14:39,154 Yeah. You notice he didn't smirk in that one? 320 00:14:39,221 --> 00:14:41,456 No, yeah. He believes that one. 321 00:14:44,126 --> 00:14:46,194 Let's hear Brian's answer. 322 00:14:46,261 --> 00:14:50,532 "I ordered one meatball sub from the gas station near my house, 323 00:14:50,599 --> 00:14:54,269 and the owner started calling me "the meatball man." 324 00:14:54,336 --> 00:14:56,305 What's up, meatball man? 325 00:14:56,371 --> 00:14:59,074 Mr. Meatball man. Meatballs! 326 00:15:01,977 --> 00:15:03,378 The meatball man! 327 00:15:03,445 --> 00:15:05,514 I mean, I don't want to be known as that. 328 00:15:05,580 --> 00:15:07,382 All over Newark, I'm known as "meatballs." 329 00:15:07,449 --> 00:15:08,693 Dude, I think it's the backwards hat. 330 00:15:08,717 --> 00:15:10,152 It's... 331 00:15:10,218 --> 00:15:13,255 But I look young. 332 00:15:13,322 --> 00:15:14,423 I mean, I'm gonna be... 333 00:15:14,489 --> 00:15:15,824 - Meatballs! - Meatballs! 334 00:15:15,891 --> 00:15:17,893 - Meatballs! - Meatballs! 335 00:15:17,959 --> 00:15:19,861 - Meatballs! - Meatballs! 336 00:15:19,928 --> 00:15:22,097 Meatballs! 337 00:15:24,066 --> 00:15:25,534 Okay, so... 338 00:15:30,238 --> 00:15:32,407 My colleague wrote, "today's American family 339 00:15:32,474 --> 00:15:35,377 is really any unit of two or more 340 00:15:35,444 --> 00:15:38,780 who have mutual love and care for one another." 341 00:15:38,847 --> 00:15:40,716 That's beautiful. 342 00:15:40,782 --> 00:15:42,284 Let's see what Murray has to say. 343 00:15:42,351 --> 00:15:44,252 "Many hands make for light work. 344 00:15:44,319 --> 00:15:48,056 Five kids and a sturdy wife to pull the plow, and... 345 00:15:52,127 --> 00:15:53,428 Sal: That's a smirk. 346 00:15:53,495 --> 00:15:56,098 "And I certainly think that a family is also a team." 347 00:15:56,164 --> 00:15:58,300 I strap Melissa up to that plow weekly. 348 00:15:58,367 --> 00:16:00,235 M-m... 349 00:16:00,302 --> 00:16:03,739 Melissa's my wife. I strap her to that plow weekly. 350 00:16:03,805 --> 00:16:06,742 She's g... I do. Who's gonna till the corn? 351 00:16:12,214 --> 00:16:14,416 "A good hotel will have a cleaning lady 352 00:16:14,483 --> 00:16:17,652 willing to share some secret puddings with you." 353 00:16:17,719 --> 00:16:20,589 Murray, that face is hysterical. 354 00:16:20,655 --> 00:16:22,991 Sal: He looks psychotic. 355 00:16:23,058 --> 00:16:24,559 I love pudding. 356 00:16:24,626 --> 00:16:26,828 There's nothing I love more after a hard day of plowing. 357 00:16:26,895 --> 00:16:28,663 There's... 358 00:16:28,730 --> 00:16:31,500 There's very little in life I love more 359 00:16:31,566 --> 00:16:34,336 after a hard day of my wife plowing... 360 00:16:35,404 --> 00:16:37,072 than pudding. 361 00:16:37,139 --> 00:16:39,875 Just a... is it a dairy farm, by the way? 362 00:16:39,941 --> 00:16:41,977 No, no, no. I don't have cattle. 363 00:16:42,043 --> 00:16:43,211 Sal: Unless you count my wife. 364 00:16:46,081 --> 00:16:48,083 He's going down in flames now. 365 00:16:51,386 --> 00:16:53,355 James has referenced January 6th. 366 00:16:53,422 --> 00:16:55,590 "Yes, on January 6th of 2021, 367 00:16:55,657 --> 00:16:57,859 we stormed the capitol and change the world. 368 00:17:03,231 --> 00:17:04,699 We've got him. You're done. 369 00:17:04,766 --> 00:17:06,668 I mean, I'll be the first to say it. 370 00:17:06,735 --> 00:17:09,037 We did it. We changed the world... 371 00:17:09,104 --> 00:17:10,505 On that day. 372 00:17:10,572 --> 00:17:12,007 Don't you... right? 373 00:17:12,073 --> 00:17:13,909 You have to... don't... Is any... 374 00:17:13,975 --> 00:17:15,377 Murray, you all right there, bud? 375 00:17:15,444 --> 00:17:19,848 No. Not that I was there. I'm just... 376 00:17:19,915 --> 00:17:21,316 You want me to read his answer? 377 00:17:24,219 --> 00:17:26,054 Narrator: Murr's not laughing now. 378 00:17:26,121 --> 00:17:28,957 He's tonight's big loser. 379 00:17:29,024 --> 00:17:31,726 Murr, my man, you lost. 380 00:17:31,793 --> 00:17:34,162 I am so glad I'm not you right now. 381 00:17:34,229 --> 00:17:36,298 Tonight, for your punishment, you will be a panelist 382 00:17:36,364 --> 00:17:38,567 on a new television show called "real talk," 383 00:17:38,633 --> 00:17:40,836 hosted by the one and only... Our friend, method man. 384 00:17:40,902 --> 00:17:43,572 All right, it's cool. 385 00:17:43,638 --> 00:17:47,108 But we're also gonna be applying a device to your body, 386 00:17:47,175 --> 00:17:51,313 a very specific part of your body, and it vibrates. 387 00:17:51,379 --> 00:17:54,316 Let's just say this is going to be 388 00:17:54,382 --> 00:17:56,351 "a whole" lot of fun. 389 00:17:59,721 --> 00:18:02,424 The time has come. 390 00:18:02,491 --> 00:18:03,501 Why don't you get behind the curtain there, 391 00:18:03,525 --> 00:18:04,826 buddy, let's see this. 392 00:18:04,893 --> 00:18:07,062 Make sure that son of a bitch is lubed up. 393 00:18:09,097 --> 00:18:11,333 We... 394 00:18:11,399 --> 00:18:13,568 Oh, my god, no, man. 395 00:18:13,635 --> 00:18:15,604 The butt's out. 396 00:18:15,670 --> 00:18:17,839 Murr: What are we doing? 397 00:18:23,678 --> 00:18:24,913 I'm sweating. 398 00:18:24,980 --> 00:18:28,049 Bro, is this happening right now, man? 399 00:18:28,116 --> 00:18:30,218 Sal: Here we go. There he is, bud. 400 00:18:30,285 --> 00:18:31,353 Hi, guys, how are you? 401 00:18:31,419 --> 00:18:32,821 Got a stiff walk there, buddy. 402 00:18:32,888 --> 00:18:34,589 Yeah. No ooh! 403 00:18:34,656 --> 00:18:35,924 James is sitting on a panel 404 00:18:35,991 --> 00:18:38,460 for method's man's new talk show, "real talk with meth." 405 00:18:38,527 --> 00:18:40,695 During this conversation in front of this audience, 406 00:18:40,762 --> 00:18:43,098 we are going to be controlling the insides of Murray. 407 00:18:43,164 --> 00:18:45,734 This is a very vulnerable position to be in. 408 00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:49,471 Sal: Here we go. 409 00:18:51,406 --> 00:18:52,941 There you go, man! 410 00:18:53,008 --> 00:18:54,848 How long have we wanted method man on the show? 411 00:18:54,876 --> 00:18:56,545 I mean, before we had a TV show, 412 00:18:56,611 --> 00:18:58,647 we wanted to do a TV show with method man. 413 00:18:58,713 --> 00:18:59,848 I'm your host, method man, 414 00:18:59,915 --> 00:19:02,217 and "real talk" is just that... Real talk. 415 00:19:02,284 --> 00:19:04,853 Let's look at it as a chat room where everybody has a voice. 416 00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:07,289 Well, you look miserable right now. 417 00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:09,257 Today we have four experts. 418 00:19:09,324 --> 00:19:10,601 You know, I just want to get right into it, 419 00:19:10,625 --> 00:19:12,360 basically introduce themselves 420 00:19:12,427 --> 00:19:14,129 and tell you what they do. 421 00:19:16,932 --> 00:19:18,543 So we'll start with Matthew. Go ahead. Just... 422 00:19:18,567 --> 00:19:19,634 Name... Matt zonas. 423 00:19:19,701 --> 00:19:21,736 Do you want to give him a little jolt right now? 424 00:19:21,803 --> 00:19:23,004 He's not expecting that. 425 00:19:23,071 --> 00:19:26,942 Let's start very low. Let's do pulse .25. 426 00:19:27,008 --> 00:19:28,977 And, you know, like most people, when we say, 427 00:19:29,044 --> 00:19:30,545 "how did you come into my job"... 428 00:19:30,612 --> 00:19:31,947 Sal: Oh! 429 00:19:33,815 --> 00:19:35,335 "Hey, I want to do college admissions." 430 00:19:36,985 --> 00:19:39,387 Murray, that's called pulse .25. Are you liking it? 431 00:19:39,454 --> 00:19:41,656 Oh, I hear it! 432 00:19:41,723 --> 00:19:43,124 We miked under his chair. 433 00:19:43,191 --> 00:19:45,460 And then I can really change someone's life, in that, 434 00:19:45,527 --> 00:19:47,495 if I'm someone around the world... 435 00:19:47,562 --> 00:19:49,731 Okay, we can stop it for now. 436 00:19:49,798 --> 00:19:51,333 You okay over there, James? 437 00:19:51,399 --> 00:19:53,001 Um, yeah, great. 438 00:19:53,068 --> 00:19:55,503 Just shifting. 439 00:19:55,570 --> 00:19:57,539 Let's let me get to James real fast then. 440 00:19:57,606 --> 00:20:00,075 Um, James, uh, go ahead. Introduce yourself, James. 441 00:20:00,141 --> 00:20:02,744 How about fireworks .25? 442 00:20:02,811 --> 00:20:04,946 My name's James Murray. 443 00:20:05,013 --> 00:20:09,451 I work in TV development for a non-scripted reality TV company. 444 00:20:09,517 --> 00:20:12,988 Really, it's just a... You know, anything... 445 00:20:13,054 --> 00:20:14,265 We're interested in all types of TV shows. 446 00:20:14,289 --> 00:20:15,457 Oh, my god. 447 00:20:15,523 --> 00:20:18,259 I'm sweating. I'm sweating right now. Hoo! 448 00:20:18,326 --> 00:20:19,861 Just to be real for a second, 449 00:20:19,928 --> 00:20:22,497 who's the biggest asshole on TV? 450 00:20:22,564 --> 00:20:27,102 That's a very topical, timely question. 451 00:20:27,168 --> 00:20:29,971 Wave mode, half speed. 452 00:20:30,038 --> 00:20:32,907 I don't think that's... aah! 453 00:20:32,974 --> 00:20:34,075 Look at... look at him. 454 00:20:34,142 --> 00:20:36,077 I think a lot of what makes a person whole 455 00:20:36,144 --> 00:20:39,981 is whether they, you know... "Hole." 456 00:20:40,048 --> 00:20:44,219 Was it, you know, was it in their formative years? 457 00:20:44,285 --> 00:20:46,955 I don't get what the buzz is all about, honestly. 458 00:20:49,257 --> 00:20:52,227 There should always be good vibes on set. 459 00:20:52,293 --> 00:20:54,529 Always good vibes, you know? 460 00:20:54,596 --> 00:20:56,598 Oh, my god. We're wrecking him. 461 00:20:56,665 --> 00:20:59,434 -What's the most basic step someone can take 462 00:20:59,501 --> 00:21:01,770 to up their physical fitness routine? 463 00:21:01,836 --> 00:21:03,738 Walking. Taking the steps. 464 00:21:03,805 --> 00:21:05,040 Hit him again, please. 465 00:21:05,106 --> 00:21:08,109 It really does help you. Like, my dad... 466 00:21:08,176 --> 00:21:09,778 Aah! 467 00:21:12,881 --> 00:21:14,215 You got something to say, James? 468 00:21:14,282 --> 00:21:17,052 For me, I just try to keep it as tight as possible. 469 00:21:17,118 --> 00:21:20,088 Sal: Look at meth! Look at meth! 470 00:21:20,155 --> 00:21:22,157 Trying not to laugh! Trying not to laugh! 471 00:21:22,223 --> 00:21:26,761 I'm also a newlywed, so that keeps me, you know, busy. 472 00:21:28,163 --> 00:21:30,632 So we're gonna move on. What makes a good password? 473 00:21:30,699 --> 00:21:33,501 Let's go to earthquake .5. 474 00:21:33,568 --> 00:21:35,946 One of the big things is using things like password manager... 475 00:21:35,970 --> 00:21:39,607 Oh, my god. 476 00:21:41,876 --> 00:21:43,178 Crank it up. Crank it up. 477 00:21:43,244 --> 00:21:45,280 We'll talk. Yeah. 478 00:21:45,346 --> 00:21:48,349 He can't take it! He can't take it! 479 00:21:48,416 --> 00:21:49,651 Murr... are you okay, James? 480 00:21:49,718 --> 00:21:53,388 Yeah, yeah. You can't get into the PlayStation? 481 00:21:53,455 --> 00:21:55,690 Do you know what I really love about the PlayStation? 482 00:21:55,757 --> 00:21:56,991 The vibration controllers? 483 00:21:59,561 --> 00:22:00,971 Kind of puts you in the game, correct? 484 00:22:00,995 --> 00:22:03,431 Oh, absolutely. You feel like you're right in it. 485 00:22:03,498 --> 00:22:06,134 Right in it. That's a great way of putting it. 486 00:22:06,201 --> 00:22:08,670 Let's do earthquake as high as it can go. Keep it on. 487 00:22:08,737 --> 00:22:11,139 We see passwords getting cracked or broken instantly. 488 00:22:12,974 --> 00:22:14,652 There's a ton of companies out there that do it. 489 00:22:14,676 --> 00:22:16,077 You look up "password manager." 490 00:22:16,144 --> 00:22:18,346 Hey, Murray, you okay? Murray, you okay? 491 00:22:18,413 --> 00:22:19,848 I'm great. Doing great. 492 00:22:21,316 --> 00:22:23,051 So as far as the fitness thing goes, 493 00:22:23,118 --> 00:22:25,386 your blood flows better in the morning. 494 00:22:28,523 --> 00:22:30,191 I work out at 7:00 A.M.! 495 00:22:32,127 --> 00:22:35,096 But if you're trying to burn fat... 496 00:22:35,163 --> 00:22:38,566 cold shower, then you go up in the gym. 497 00:22:38,633 --> 00:22:40,668 Sal: Buddy, you look frantic. 498 00:22:40,735 --> 00:22:41,779 Do you have to use the bathroom? 499 00:22:41,803 --> 00:22:43,280 No, I got to go. I'm sorry. I got to go. 500 00:22:43,304 --> 00:22:45,006 It has been a pleasure. 501 00:22:49,410 --> 00:22:52,480 Well, I'm gonna conclude it. James just left. 502 00:22:52,547 --> 00:22:53,748 That was interesting. 503 00:22:53,815 --> 00:22:55,283 He was fidgeting before you came out. 504 00:22:55,350 --> 00:22:56,384 Was he? A lot? 505 00:22:56,451 --> 00:22:58,520 He said something before he sat down. 506 00:22:58,586 --> 00:23:00,355 He just, like, whispered something 507 00:23:00,421 --> 00:23:02,590 about, like, his butt or something. 508 00:23:02,657 --> 00:23:05,260 Yeah. Oh, he's just one weird bald mother 509 00:23:07,929 --> 00:23:08,929 yes! 510 00:23:08,963 --> 00:23:10,398 Thank you. I appreciate it. 511 00:23:10,465 --> 00:23:12,100 All right. 512 00:23:12,167 --> 00:23:14,702 Amazing. Amazing, buddy. Amazing. 37286

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