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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,155 --> 00:00:02,808 Psst! Fellas, fellas... 2 00:00:03,003 --> 00:00:05,522 What if I impractically-joke David cross? 3 00:00:05,606 --> 00:00:07,012 Certainly. Yeah. 4 00:00:07,097 --> 00:00:08,325 I'm gonna do it. Knock yourself out. 5 00:00:09,951 --> 00:00:11,024 Hey, guys. 6 00:00:11,109 --> 00:00:13,062 Hey. What's up, buddy? 7 00:00:13,147 --> 00:00:15,598 Let's get this thing started. 8 00:00:15,682 --> 00:00:17,400 Hey, oh, this is some creative... 9 00:00:17,484 --> 00:00:19,844 Oh, you got a stain on your shirt, bud. 10 00:00:19,929 --> 00:00:22,405 Yeah? 11 00:00:22,489 --> 00:00:24,108 What the **** Man?! 12 00:00:26,627 --> 00:00:28,877 S-sorry. No, he deserved it. 13 00:00:28,962 --> 00:00:30,480 You know what's really messed up? 14 00:00:30,564 --> 00:00:32,683 David, you really do have a stain on your shirt. 15 00:00:32,767 --> 00:00:33,884 Oh, where, where? It's right there. 16 00:00:33,968 --> 00:00:34,885 It's right there. Boop! 17 00:00:37,638 --> 00:00:39,356 You got me, 'cause I thought there was a stain. 18 00:00:41,794 --> 00:00:42,794 Stop! 19 00:00:56,857 --> 00:00:57,974 Let's just get this started. 20 00:00:58,058 --> 00:00:59,576 Are you **** Kidding me? 21 00:00:59,660 --> 00:01:00,911 Who's a good dog? 22 00:01:09,135 --> 00:01:11,854 With special guest David cross! 23 00:01:11,938 --> 00:01:13,767 Use it! 24 00:01:15,451 --> 00:01:16,993 Today, we're cleaning the garage. 25 00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:19,462 And it's a huge job, so we've hired someone to help. 26 00:01:19,546 --> 00:01:22,595 The thing is, we have no idea what we're about to come across 27 00:01:22,680 --> 00:01:24,534 Because it's been put there by the other guys. 28 00:01:24,618 --> 00:01:27,069 If you refuse to do or say anything, you lose. 29 00:01:28,622 --> 00:01:29,655 Shut up! 30 00:01:33,159 --> 00:01:35,678 So, Q has no idea what's inside his garage. 31 00:01:35,762 --> 00:01:37,480 When he pulls up the door, he'll see what we planned for him. 32 00:01:37,564 --> 00:01:41,618 Oh, boys, what mysteries await me? 33 00:01:41,702 --> 00:01:44,421 There's an old friend in here from times past. 34 00:01:44,505 --> 00:01:47,023 From lonelier times. 35 00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:48,625 Oh, what's your name? 36 00:01:48,709 --> 00:01:50,110 - Marie. - I'm Brian. 37 00:01:50,195 --> 00:01:51,628 - Hi, Brian. - So nice to meet you. 38 00:01:51,712 --> 00:01:53,630 Nice to meet you. Just donating some stuff. 39 00:01:53,714 --> 00:01:55,643 Just giving it to charity. It won't take that long. 40 00:01:55,727 --> 00:01:57,927 - Oh, here we go! - Yeah. 41 00:01:59,653 --> 00:02:01,237 Yeah. 42 00:02:01,321 --> 00:02:03,774 Do you want to start with the sex robot in front of you 43 00:02:03,858 --> 00:02:05,842 Or end with it? 44 00:02:05,926 --> 00:02:08,244 What stuff are you donating? 45 00:02:08,328 --> 00:02:11,114 Well, I was gonna donate this... this here, um, uh... 46 00:02:11,198 --> 00:02:12,315 Sex robot. 47 00:02:12,399 --> 00:02:14,384 Yeah, just be gentle with her. 48 00:02:14,468 --> 00:02:16,252 She's been through a lot. Do you need release? 49 00:02:16,336 --> 00:02:18,989 No, you're going... 50 00:02:19,073 --> 00:02:21,458 Robot, turn off. 51 00:02:21,542 --> 00:02:23,193 Suck mode activated. 52 00:02:23,277 --> 00:02:25,128 Robot off. 53 00:02:25,212 --> 00:02:27,330 Oh, my god! 54 00:02:27,414 --> 00:02:29,332 Q there's an urn in there buddy. Find the urn. 55 00:02:29,416 --> 00:02:32,402 Uh, that urn is uncle pep pep. 56 00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:35,521 What's that? This is uncle pep pep. 57 00:02:37,357 --> 00:02:38,541 Oh **** 58 00:02:38,625 --> 00:02:41,812 Q, freak out that you got uncle pep on you. 59 00:02:41,896 --> 00:02:44,614 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! 60 00:02:44,966 --> 00:02:47,757 No, no, no, no! Oh, no! 61 00:02:48,093 --> 00:02:50,278 Oh! My aunt's gonna have a cow. 62 00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:52,222 Oh, my god. 63 00:02:55,993 --> 00:02:58,361 Just clean it and clean yourself up. 64 00:02:58,445 --> 00:02:59,639 She makes so much sense. 65 00:02:59,724 --> 00:03:03,064 Marie is a woman of few words, and they're all practical. 66 00:03:03,167 --> 00:03:05,168 Put that right there, underneath. 67 00:03:05,252 --> 00:03:07,638 She is telling him what to do with his own **** 68 00:03:07,722 --> 00:03:09,772 Can you drop the ashes everywhere, buddy? 69 00:03:09,856 --> 00:03:11,441 Alright. 70 00:03:11,525 --> 00:03:12,575 Are you gonna want this? 71 00:03:12,659 --> 00:03:13,710 Okay. 72 00:03:13,794 --> 00:03:16,579 - Oh, I'll go pick it up. - The urn fell over. 73 00:03:16,663 --> 00:03:18,915 Oh, shit. It just fell. 74 00:03:21,001 --> 00:03:22,452 Oh, no! 75 00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:24,521 Oh, my god! What are we gonna do?! 76 00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:26,456 I thought it was a level surface! 77 00:03:27,541 --> 00:03:29,592 Wait a minute. What? What do you got? 78 00:03:29,676 --> 00:03:32,795 I got it. Oh, my god! She's amazing! 79 00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:34,397 Don't panic. 80 00:03:34,481 --> 00:03:36,199 Okay, okay. 81 00:03:36,283 --> 00:03:41,204 She's cleaning up the ashes of uncle pep pep. 82 00:03:41,288 --> 00:03:42,338 Don't... wait a minute. 83 00:03:42,422 --> 00:03:43,606 I'm doing it gradually. Okay, I'm sorry. 84 00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:48,478 You want her on your side, this woman. 85 00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:50,613 Yeah. She's no nonsense. 86 00:03:50,697 --> 00:03:52,815 There's a stone in there. Should I get that out? 87 00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:55,218 Yeah, get it out. Okay. 88 00:03:55,302 --> 00:03:56,486 Q, your hand is caught in the urn. 89 00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,154 You can't get it out. 90 00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:00,757 Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! 91 00:04:02,108 --> 00:04:03,360 No, no, no, no, no, no! 92 00:04:03,444 --> 00:04:05,295 Are you serious? 93 00:04:07,314 --> 00:04:08,899 Could you try pulling that? 94 00:04:08,983 --> 00:04:11,083 You know what's gonna happen? 95 00:04:13,654 --> 00:04:15,438 I just want to lube it up a little bit. 96 00:04:15,522 --> 00:04:18,174 Lubing in 10... No, no, no. 97 00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:19,910 ...9, 8... 98 00:04:22,196 --> 00:04:24,314 Oh, my god! 99 00:04:24,398 --> 00:04:25,982 It is a bit of a mess. 100 00:04:26,066 --> 00:04:27,183 Yeah. 101 00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:29,319 Hey, Sal, take a look at what you got in there, buddy. 102 00:04:29,403 --> 00:04:31,854 Kindly notice the boxes and cases 103 00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:34,925 Of N95 masks and sanitizer. 104 00:04:35,009 --> 00:04:36,727 First, you know what the biggest thing is 105 00:04:36,811 --> 00:04:38,261 That we have in this garage seems to be 106 00:04:38,345 --> 00:04:42,865 The extreme, um, amount of ppe and hand sanitizer. 107 00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,867 Yeah. 108 00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:46,295 I'll go on, like, the website 109 00:04:46,380 --> 00:04:48,204 And see where, like, things are spiking. 110 00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:50,473 Tell her that you sell it at a huge profit. 111 00:04:52,359 --> 00:04:54,945 Then I'll try to sell it out of like a trunk or something. 112 00:04:55,029 --> 00:04:56,608 At a healthy markup. 113 00:04:56,693 --> 00:04:58,681 Yeah, like, at a healthy markup. 114 00:04:58,765 --> 00:05:00,150 Yeah. I bet. You have to do it. Yeah. 115 00:05:00,234 --> 00:05:01,752 Ka-ching! Yeah. 116 00:05:04,038 --> 00:05:07,424 Notice the picture you framed there in the corner, behind you. 117 00:05:07,508 --> 00:05:09,826 Yeah. That should get out, too. 118 00:05:11,578 --> 00:05:13,430 Oh, god, yeah. This is... 119 00:05:13,514 --> 00:05:15,165 This is **** Up. 120 00:05:15,249 --> 00:05:16,433 Don't want to lose this. 121 00:05:16,517 --> 00:05:20,503 This is, uh... 122 00:05:20,587 --> 00:05:22,305 You know, this is Saddam Hussein. 123 00:05:22,389 --> 00:05:24,040 Oh, no kidding? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. 124 00:05:24,124 --> 00:05:25,842 He meant a lot to me as a child. 125 00:05:25,926 --> 00:05:28,578 So, to me, um... 126 00:05:28,953 --> 00:05:31,047 To me, he's just good old uncle Saddam. 127 00:05:33,067 --> 00:05:36,519 So, don't... what I say is, don't judge a book by its cover. 128 00:05:36,603 --> 00:05:37,603 I'm sure, yeah. 129 00:05:39,073 --> 00:05:40,323 Yeah, exactly. 130 00:05:40,407 --> 00:05:42,581 Thank god you feel that way. 131 00:05:42,954 --> 00:05:45,996 Whoo, boy. Find the box of vhs tapes. 132 00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:48,665 Oh, my god. 133 00:05:48,749 --> 00:05:50,000 VHS. 134 00:05:50,084 --> 00:05:51,734 You've definitely used vhs, right? 135 00:05:51,818 --> 00:05:53,003 Yeah, I have. 136 00:05:53,087 --> 00:05:54,737 Can you just take that for me? 137 00:05:54,821 --> 00:05:57,007 Oh, what's in the vhs box, though, bud? 138 00:05:57,091 --> 00:05:58,408 What are those, anyway? 139 00:05:58,492 --> 00:06:00,743 Um, I think they just... What titles are there? 140 00:06:00,827 --> 00:06:03,346 Like "man with goat," "man with horse." 141 00:06:04,699 --> 00:06:06,549 What other ones? 142 00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:07,950 What... what other ones? 143 00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:09,285 Um, I don't know. 144 00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,087 Honestly, um, I think I'm gonna go home. 145 00:06:11,171 --> 00:06:14,491 I'm a little confused. 146 00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:17,494 Oh, my god, bud. Oh! 147 00:06:17,578 --> 00:06:19,896 What does that even mean? 148 00:06:19,980 --> 00:06:21,764 You lost. Yeah, it means you lost. 149 00:06:21,848 --> 00:06:24,767 Give me a **** Break with this turn. 150 00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:26,436 "Man with horse"? 151 00:06:29,256 --> 00:06:30,507 Alright, here we go. 152 00:06:30,591 --> 00:06:31,641 Alright, here he goes. 153 00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:32,642 Alright. 154 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,711 Oh, god. Oh. 155 00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:37,914 Okay. 156 00:06:37,998 --> 00:06:40,583 There is zero negative space in there. 157 00:06:40,667 --> 00:06:42,785 Burrow in there like the ferret that you are. 158 00:06:42,869 --> 00:06:44,787 Yeah. Let me... give me... 159 00:06:44,871 --> 00:06:46,594 Give me your shoulder to lean on. 160 00:06:46,679 --> 00:06:47,724 I'm gonna go in. 161 00:06:47,808 --> 00:06:49,059 - You got it? - Yeah. 162 00:06:49,143 --> 00:06:50,260 You got it? Okay, here we go. 163 00:06:50,344 --> 00:06:51,662 Let's figure this out. Okay. 164 00:06:51,746 --> 00:06:53,930 Okay. Okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay. 165 00:06:54,014 --> 00:06:56,599 Now leap. Now leap. 166 00:07:01,288 --> 00:07:02,288 Oh. 167 00:07:04,891 --> 00:07:06,543 Okay, hold on. Hold on, Pete. You alright? 168 00:07:06,627 --> 00:07:09,612 I'm gonna do this. 169 00:07:09,696 --> 00:07:11,548 Come here. Let's get these out of here. 170 00:07:11,632 --> 00:07:12,949 Okay. 171 00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:14,885 Take a breather and have a little heart-to-heart chat. 172 00:07:14,969 --> 00:07:16,352 Have a seat. Have a seat for a second. 173 00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:17,888 Take a load of. We're working hard, have a seat. 174 00:07:17,972 --> 00:07:20,223 You know, what happened is my dad passed away. 175 00:07:20,307 --> 00:07:22,893 A week later, my mom married my step dad. 176 00:07:22,977 --> 00:07:25,628 My dad passed away, right? Yeah. 177 00:07:25,712 --> 00:07:29,700 A week later, my mom marries my step dad. 178 00:07:29,784 --> 00:07:31,501 Pete, I don't like him at all. 179 00:07:31,585 --> 00:07:33,704 You know, it's just, you know, he came in, he's not my father. 180 00:07:33,788 --> 00:07:36,038 He's got this huge, old dong on him. 181 00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:40,777 He's got... my step dad... 182 00:07:40,861 --> 00:07:42,445 Has this... 183 00:07:42,529 --> 00:07:45,782 My step dad has this huge, old dong on him. 184 00:07:45,866 --> 00:07:48,719 Oh, my god. **** 185 00:07:48,803 --> 00:07:52,055 My mother won't stop talking about it. 186 00:07:52,139 --> 00:07:56,459 Oh, my god. 187 00:07:56,543 --> 00:07:57,928 Start throwing that dong around. 188 00:07:58,012 --> 00:07:59,996 Yeah, you know, I don't want him 189 00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:01,798 To start throwing the weight of that dong... 190 00:08:04,351 --> 00:08:06,803 You know, 'cause his dong is big, feet. 191 00:08:06,887 --> 00:08:08,338 Just a giant dong. 192 00:08:08,422 --> 00:08:10,540 Yeah, that dong's in there floating around right now. 193 00:08:10,624 --> 00:08:11,942 Yeah, someone in the house... 194 00:08:15,696 --> 00:08:17,480 There's nothing in the house. There's nothing. 195 00:08:18,965 --> 00:08:20,951 Too much dong talk. 196 00:08:21,035 --> 00:08:23,219 That was a refusal, but there's something we have planned. 197 00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:24,554 Yeah, we cannot end this yet. 198 00:08:24,638 --> 00:08:26,423 Oh. 199 00:08:26,507 --> 00:08:28,425 Move it. Oh! 200 00:08:28,509 --> 00:08:30,893 Look, it's your step dad. It's step dad. 201 00:08:30,977 --> 00:08:32,511 Oh, no! 202 00:08:34,438 --> 00:08:36,967 There's something we have planned. - Yeah, we cannot end this yet. 203 00:08:37,051 --> 00:08:38,584 Oh. 204 00:08:39,853 --> 00:08:43,840 Oh, no, Murr! Look, it's your step dad! 205 00:08:45,725 --> 00:08:47,243 Pete, Pete, Pete, Pete! It's my step dad. 206 00:08:47,327 --> 00:08:49,779 Uh-oh, step dad. Put him over your knee. 207 00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:52,115 No, no, no, no, no. 208 00:08:52,199 --> 00:08:53,116 - Come here. Come over here. - Okay. 209 00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:54,384 You're getting spanked. 210 00:08:54,468 --> 00:08:56,052 Didn't I tell you not to touch my stuff? 211 00:08:56,136 --> 00:08:57,721 - No, I'm sorry. - Huh? Huh? 212 00:08:57,805 --> 00:09:00,456 Come on, boy. Bad, bad boy. 213 00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,859 - I'm sorry, step dad. - Step dad. 214 00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:04,394 Pete, how are you ignoring this? 215 00:09:04,612 --> 00:09:06,612 Pete, how are you ignoring this? 216 00:09:09,274 --> 00:09:10,191 Murr, bad news, by the way. 217 00:09:10,284 --> 00:09:11,735 You refused before, so you lost, 218 00:09:11,819 --> 00:09:13,603 So that whole step dad thing was for nothing. 219 00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:17,807 I'm gonna head inside and serve your mother up some dong. 220 00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:25,412 Murr and Sal couldn't clean up their act, 221 00:09:25,507 --> 00:09:28,609 Making them first up on the loser board. 222 00:09:28,694 --> 00:09:30,302 So, we know you've got a potty mouth, 223 00:09:30,387 --> 00:09:31,955 So you know what you can and cannot say, right, 224 00:09:32,039 --> 00:09:33,623 On television without bleeping? 225 00:09:33,707 --> 00:09:38,094 So, I mean, am I at some point able to go like... 226 00:09:38,178 --> 00:09:41,497 "you mother**** Piece of **** Mother****"? 227 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:42,766 You know, somebody's bothering me. 228 00:09:42,850 --> 00:09:44,679 We could ask. Okay. 229 00:09:44,764 --> 00:09:46,770 You know, normally, you can't say **** **** 230 00:09:46,854 --> 00:09:51,174 **** **** **** **** 231 00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:52,376 So, like, for example, if you said, 232 00:09:52,460 --> 00:09:54,644 "**** Horse ****" mm-hmm. 233 00:09:54,728 --> 00:09:56,846 Some words would be bleeped, others not. 234 00:09:56,930 --> 00:09:58,514 Because it's about the context, right? 235 00:09:58,598 --> 00:09:59,783 Yes. Context. Yes. 236 00:09:59,867 --> 00:10:01,385 Alright. Well, thank you. 237 00:10:01,469 --> 00:10:03,387 Today, we're teaming up at Jay suites, 238 00:10:03,471 --> 00:10:05,989 Work shopping a presentation on ghouls and ghosts 239 00:10:06,073 --> 00:10:07,657 To focus-group participants. 240 00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:11,327 The scary part is our presentations have been created 241 00:10:11,411 --> 00:10:12,796 by the other guys. 242 00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:14,530 At the end, we'll ask the participants 243 00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,466 To raise their hands 244 00:10:16,550 --> 00:10:19,735 If they think our presentation is good to go. 245 00:10:19,819 --> 00:10:23,422 The team with the fewest hands raised loses. 246 00:10:27,161 --> 00:10:30,546 So, guys, this is something new today. 247 00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:32,282 You may be asking who 248 00:10:32,366 --> 00:10:34,017 This handsome gentleman is to my right. 249 00:10:34,101 --> 00:10:36,820 Max is my dear, dear friend. He is our barber. 250 00:10:36,904 --> 00:10:39,089 But, I mean, now we've been friends for a decade. 251 00:10:39,173 --> 00:10:40,890 He cuts my hair, Q's hair. 252 00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:44,027 I never feel as pretty as I do when I leave Max's shop. 253 00:10:44,111 --> 00:10:45,695 Thank you. Thank you so much. 254 00:10:45,779 --> 00:10:47,697 Alright, Max. Here we go. 255 00:10:47,781 --> 00:10:50,166 We are in the world of the paranormal. 256 00:10:50,250 --> 00:10:51,567 Let's take you through it. Max, you want to start off? 257 00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:54,904 Yeah. "The real life babadook: 258 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:58,508 The wicked haunting of colts neck, New Jersey." 259 00:10:58,592 --> 00:11:00,510 Alright, here we go, here we go. 260 00:11:00,594 --> 00:11:02,446 Signs you got a 'dook. 261 00:11:03,731 --> 00:11:05,649 Door slams on their own. 262 00:11:05,733 --> 00:11:08,184 You've heard these common ones, right? 263 00:11:08,268 --> 00:11:10,520 Walls bleed sometimes. You've seen it in movies. 264 00:11:10,604 --> 00:11:11,721 It's happened in real life. 265 00:11:11,805 --> 00:11:13,657 But never blood. Sometimes... 266 00:11:17,945 --> 00:11:19,796 Sometimes smegma. Smegma. 267 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,532 Uh, smegma. 268 00:11:22,616 --> 00:11:24,067 Moving on. 269 00:11:24,151 --> 00:11:28,538 The time the babadook possessed my soul. 270 00:11:28,622 --> 00:11:31,675 I entered the szeluga house. 271 00:11:31,759 --> 00:11:37,481 The "dook," in turn, entered me via my mouth. 272 00:11:37,565 --> 00:11:39,816 I felt myself die. 273 00:11:39,900 --> 00:11:42,018 I was possessed. I was possessed. 274 00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:44,888 It came in right in my mouth. I have a babadook in my mouth. 275 00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:49,625 Hit. 276 00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:53,897 Oil extract from a babadook wards off evil spirits. 277 00:11:53,981 --> 00:11:55,031 Yep. 278 00:11:55,115 --> 00:11:58,768 Hands stimulation is the best procedure 279 00:11:58,852 --> 00:12:01,305 To extract the most 'dook oil. 280 00:12:01,389 --> 00:12:02,972 The best. 281 00:12:03,056 --> 00:12:05,308 You see where this is going? I do. 282 00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:07,043 Gent... 283 00:12:07,127 --> 00:12:10,514 Gently... 284 00:12:10,598 --> 00:12:12,382 Look at Max. Can't get it out. 285 00:12:12,466 --> 00:12:16,520 Gently massage that 'dook. Get that oil. 286 00:12:16,604 --> 00:12:20,056 I will now rub actual babadook oil 287 00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:24,260 On my partner's face to protect his soul. 288 00:12:27,281 --> 00:12:28,665 I'm gonna get the 'dook all over his face. 289 00:12:28,749 --> 00:12:31,000 Wait, wait. 290 00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:34,003 Oh. Oh, my god. 291 00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:36,139 Fresh from the 'dook. 292 00:12:36,223 --> 00:12:38,408 Oh, my god. Now you got a dookie face. 293 00:12:38,492 --> 00:12:41,411 I jerked off a 'dook for that. 294 00:12:41,495 --> 00:12:43,413 No, no, no, no, no, no! 295 00:12:47,435 --> 00:12:49,285 I jerked... jerked... 296 00:12:52,372 --> 00:12:53,690 Look at these guys' face! 297 00:12:55,509 --> 00:12:56,826 Just by show of hands, 298 00:12:56,910 --> 00:12:58,494 Do any of you think that the presentation 299 00:12:58,578 --> 00:13:01,431 Is ready to go right now, by show of hands? 300 00:13:01,515 --> 00:13:03,233 - Okay. - Oh! 301 00:13:03,317 --> 00:13:04,368 Yeah, yeah. Don't worry about it. 302 00:13:04,452 --> 00:13:05,835 You did good. Thank you so much. 303 00:13:08,255 --> 00:13:09,839 How you doing, guys? Welcome, welcome. 304 00:13:09,923 --> 00:13:12,576 We are paranormal enthusiasts. 305 00:13:12,660 --> 00:13:13,910 Alright. 306 00:13:13,994 --> 00:13:17,447 So, first, "ghosts, goblins, and ghouls: 307 00:13:17,531 --> 00:13:20,516 Our experience with paranormal beings." 308 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:22,986 Okay, types of spirits. Here we go. 309 00:13:23,070 --> 00:13:25,855 Number one, ghost... Female spirit. 310 00:13:25,939 --> 00:13:28,124 Number two. Ghoul... male spirits. 311 00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:30,594 Yes. Number three is... 312 00:13:30,678 --> 00:13:33,529 Gabaghoul... Italian male spirit. 313 00:13:33,613 --> 00:13:35,131 The gabaghoul. 314 00:13:35,215 --> 00:13:36,866 Number four is... 315 00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:40,203 A Ghoulmah. Yeah, a... A Ghoulmah. 316 00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:44,941 A Ghoulmah is, of course, an extramarital spirit. 317 00:13:46,960 --> 00:13:48,412 Okay. 318 00:13:48,496 --> 00:13:53,750 So, the question is, are spirits in this room? 319 00:13:53,834 --> 00:13:55,351 In the top drawer, we have something for you. 320 00:13:55,435 --> 00:13:56,420 Pull that out, Q. 321 00:14:03,943 --> 00:14:05,395 In top drawer. We have something for you. 322 00:14:05,479 --> 00:14:07,864 Pull that out, Q. 323 00:14:11,552 --> 00:14:14,737 Okay. So this is what we call a spirit finder. 324 00:14:14,821 --> 00:14:17,140 Really a stud finder, so use it on the wall. 325 00:14:17,224 --> 00:14:18,475 Oh! 326 00:14:18,559 --> 00:14:19,810 You guys hearing that? 327 00:14:19,894 --> 00:14:24,080 - Pretty good? - Oh! 328 00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:26,817 That is a ghost for sure! 329 00:14:28,569 --> 00:14:29,702 Moving on. 330 00:14:33,173 --> 00:14:34,224 If you don't mind. 331 00:14:34,308 --> 00:14:36,893 I can't believe they are still sitting there. 332 00:14:36,977 --> 00:14:38,961 If they oblige this... 333 00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:40,497 I'll collect them. 334 00:14:40,581 --> 00:14:42,833 Great, and... Oh, wow. 335 00:14:42,917 --> 00:14:44,100 Here we go. 336 00:14:44,184 --> 00:14:45,636 They're actually getting them to take their shoes off. 337 00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:49,239 Dude, that's crazy! I did not think that would happen. 338 00:14:49,323 --> 00:14:52,108 Okay, thank you. 339 00:14:52,192 --> 00:14:54,044 Just by show of hands alone, 340 00:14:54,128 --> 00:14:56,379 If you think that this presentation is ready 341 00:14:56,463 --> 00:14:58,781 To take out to the public, 342 00:14:58,865 --> 00:15:00,366 Please raise your hands right now. 343 00:15:03,003 --> 00:15:05,388 Nah. Sorry, guys. 344 00:15:05,472 --> 00:15:06,656 I hear the spirits. 345 00:15:09,009 --> 00:15:11,461 Murr and Q got spooked during this challenge, 346 00:15:11,545 --> 00:15:14,331 Making Murr tonight's big loser. 347 00:15:14,415 --> 00:15:16,933 Murr is our big loser. And today, buddy, 348 00:15:17,017 --> 00:15:20,136 We have set up for you a very special acting class 349 00:15:20,220 --> 00:15:22,472 Taught by the very special David cross. 350 00:15:22,556 --> 00:15:24,140 - Okay. - That's right. Now, James... 351 00:15:24,224 --> 00:15:28,144 Are you familiar with the sense memory acting technique? 352 00:15:28,228 --> 00:15:29,746 - Sense? - No. 353 00:15:29,830 --> 00:15:30,813 It's the acting technique 354 00:15:30,897 --> 00:15:33,349 Of experience something firsthand for real 355 00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:35,686 So that you can recall it later in an actual scene. 356 00:15:35,770 --> 00:15:36,953 Okay. Yeah. 357 00:15:37,037 --> 00:15:41,091 And I got some rather advanced acting experiences. 358 00:15:41,175 --> 00:15:42,559 This is way too vague. 359 00:15:42,643 --> 00:15:44,026 What do you think's gonna happen? 360 00:15:44,110 --> 00:15:46,363 I feel like something's going inside me at some point. 361 00:15:48,048 --> 00:15:49,232 Alright, so, David's about to go in there 362 00:15:49,316 --> 00:15:51,501 And teach a class on sense memory. 363 00:15:51,585 --> 00:15:54,170 Hi. I'm David cross, and I'm gonna be teaching. 364 00:15:54,254 --> 00:15:56,306 What we're gonna utilize is sense memory. 365 00:15:56,390 --> 00:15:58,975 Okay. Let's do a scene. 366 00:15:59,059 --> 00:16:00,911 We dug coal together. 367 00:16:00,995 --> 00:16:01,978 Murr... throw your hand up right now, Murr. 368 00:16:02,062 --> 00:16:02,979 Throw your hand up right now. 369 00:16:03,063 --> 00:16:04,781 Murr, this is you, buddy. 370 00:16:04,865 --> 00:16:06,717 It's all about sense memory, baby. 371 00:16:06,801 --> 00:16:08,919 You've got black lung, okay? 372 00:16:10,537 --> 00:16:13,924 So, this one is a spoonful of cinnamon. 373 00:16:14,008 --> 00:16:16,259 Boyd succumbs to his black lung 374 00:16:16,343 --> 00:16:18,929 And must say farewell to his best friend. 375 00:16:20,747 --> 00:16:21,932 I just put it on my tongue? 376 00:16:22,016 --> 00:16:24,267 Yeah. And just talk with it in the scene. 377 00:16:24,351 --> 00:16:27,069 This is what it's like to have black lung. 378 00:16:27,153 --> 00:16:28,871 How do I not breathe when I'm talking? 379 00:16:28,955 --> 00:16:31,007 Well, that's on you. Okay. 380 00:16:34,961 --> 00:16:36,279 There you go, Murr. 381 00:16:37,832 --> 00:16:39,631 Murr... look at Murr. 382 00:16:41,836 --> 00:16:43,153 Okay, great. 383 00:16:45,572 --> 00:16:48,891 Okay, here we go. 384 00:16:48,975 --> 00:16:50,560 Right, so that's... use it. 385 00:16:50,644 --> 00:16:53,363 Use it, use it, use it. 386 00:16:53,447 --> 00:16:55,698 Don't you give up on me now, Boyd. 387 00:16:55,782 --> 00:16:58,635 You've been digging coal to... 388 00:16:58,719 --> 00:17:00,236 You're gonna do it again! 389 00:17:02,656 --> 00:17:04,441 Slow down. 390 00:17:04,525 --> 00:17:06,042 Do his voice! 391 00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:07,710 You got to enunciate, though. I know... 392 00:17:07,794 --> 00:17:09,179 I'm trying, Dave cross! 393 00:17:11,398 --> 00:17:14,117 I definitely have black lung, buddy. 394 00:17:14,201 --> 00:17:15,918 So much black lung. 395 00:17:16,002 --> 00:17:16,987 Whoa, that looks awful. 396 00:17:17,071 --> 00:17:19,189 Okay, great. Very good. 397 00:17:19,273 --> 00:17:20,457 Wow. 398 00:17:20,541 --> 00:17:23,259 So, the next sense memory we got lined up, 399 00:17:23,343 --> 00:17:25,996 This is a little bit more advanced. 400 00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:27,263 Murr... throw your hand up right now, Murr. 401 00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:28,665 It's basically... 402 00:17:28,749 --> 00:17:30,601 Yeah? I'll do it. 403 00:17:30,685 --> 00:17:32,335 You said advanced. I'm in. 404 00:17:32,419 --> 00:17:34,270 Okay. Come on up, James. 405 00:17:34,354 --> 00:17:36,006 And I need two more. 406 00:17:36,090 --> 00:17:37,940 Bridget and Tina. 407 00:17:38,024 --> 00:17:40,410 So that's Bridget and Tina. They're with us. 408 00:17:40,494 --> 00:17:41,944 This is called "the trail." 409 00:17:42,028 --> 00:17:44,547 First scene, it's cannibalism. 410 00:17:45,766 --> 00:17:48,418 You're going to be portraying somebody 411 00:17:48,502 --> 00:17:51,154 That has to eat another human being. 412 00:17:51,238 --> 00:17:55,758 So, this one is bull testicle, and... 413 00:17:57,711 --> 00:17:59,578 This is a bull testicle. 414 00:18:02,182 --> 00:18:03,500 In the rockies during the harsh winter, 415 00:18:03,584 --> 00:18:05,702 The settlers turned to cannibalism to survive. 416 00:18:05,786 --> 00:18:09,239 Alright, James, you're the one who wanted the advanced, okay? 417 00:18:09,323 --> 00:18:10,640 Yeah. Alright. 418 00:18:10,724 --> 00:18:13,309 Just shove those bull balls into your mouth, babe. 419 00:18:13,393 --> 00:18:15,045 Okay. There you go. Great. 420 00:18:15,129 --> 00:18:17,714 I know it seems gross. Use that. 421 00:18:17,798 --> 00:18:20,250 That is not a bull testicle. That is... 422 00:18:20,334 --> 00:18:23,520 A real testicle. That's a real testicle. 423 00:18:26,273 --> 00:18:27,590 Alright? Like a human. 424 00:18:27,674 --> 00:18:29,726 That's what you got to use. Okay? 425 00:18:29,810 --> 00:18:31,127 Okay. Here we go. 426 00:18:31,211 --> 00:18:33,530 Oh! 427 00:18:33,614 --> 00:18:34,998 Action. 428 00:18:35,082 --> 00:18:37,534 You need strength. 429 00:18:37,618 --> 00:18:39,802 We will not consume the flesh of another. 430 00:18:39,886 --> 00:18:42,004 It's against god. Then you're already dead. 431 00:18:42,088 --> 00:18:44,541 John chomps down the piece of flesh defiantly. 432 00:18:44,625 --> 00:18:47,544 Defiantly. 433 00:18:47,628 --> 00:18:50,080 Oh, here we go. And bite that nut. 434 00:18:50,164 --> 00:18:52,815 Bite that nut. Bite. 435 00:18:52,899 --> 00:18:55,017 Bite that nut. 436 00:18:55,101 --> 00:18:56,368 Bite that nut. 437 00:18:57,904 --> 00:18:59,155 Eat it, Murr. Eat it! 438 00:19:01,375 --> 00:19:02,492 Oh. 439 00:19:02,576 --> 00:19:06,897 Oh! Oh, my god! 440 00:19:06,981 --> 00:19:08,699 You got to rip it off. This is visceral. 441 00:19:08,783 --> 00:19:11,501 This is... use it. Come on, now. 442 00:19:11,585 --> 00:19:13,103 Let's go. 443 00:19:13,187 --> 00:19:15,187 - I got... - Alright. 444 00:19:16,457 --> 00:19:20,043 If you don't... 445 00:19:20,127 --> 00:19:22,112 Oh, my god, it's disgusting. It's stringy. 446 00:19:22,196 --> 00:19:23,780 Well, that was... It was... okay. 447 00:19:23,864 --> 00:19:25,115 Since he didn't eat that one, 448 00:19:25,199 --> 00:19:26,316 Maybe you keep him onstage, David. 449 00:19:26,400 --> 00:19:28,985 James, I'm gonna have you stay. 450 00:19:29,069 --> 00:19:32,522 "Crimson fields"... This is also advanced. 451 00:19:32,606 --> 00:19:33,990 This is where it turns up a notch. 452 00:19:34,074 --> 00:19:35,525 Yeah. This is turning it up a notch. 453 00:19:35,609 --> 00:19:36,927 This is gonna be a ghost pepper. 454 00:19:37,011 --> 00:19:38,461 James, put this glove on. 455 00:19:38,545 --> 00:19:40,931 What is... what is ghost pepper? 456 00:19:41,015 --> 00:19:42,399 It's, like, one of the hottest peppers. 457 00:19:42,483 --> 00:19:43,600 Yeah, it's a very hot pepper. 458 00:19:43,684 --> 00:19:45,067 He doesn't know what's coming. 459 00:19:45,151 --> 00:19:46,202 Oh, no. 460 00:19:46,286 --> 00:19:48,004 Only touch it with the gloved hand, okay? 461 00:19:48,088 --> 00:19:51,141 Do you understand? This is serious, okay? 462 00:19:51,225 --> 00:19:54,277 And you need to eat this. 463 00:19:54,361 --> 00:19:55,412 Take a bite out of it? 464 00:19:55,496 --> 00:19:57,680 Like, eat the pepper. Yeah. 465 00:19:57,764 --> 00:20:01,217 This is about as sense memory as it gets, okay? 466 00:20:01,301 --> 00:20:04,220 Is this dangerous? It's up there. 467 00:20:07,174 --> 00:20:08,759 You're gonna be fine. We got some water. 468 00:20:08,843 --> 00:20:10,293 Can we get some water for him? 469 00:20:10,377 --> 00:20:12,028 So when do I do this? 470 00:20:12,112 --> 00:20:13,363 Right now, at the beginning. Oh. 471 00:20:13,447 --> 00:20:14,831 And then we'll start the scene. Okay. 472 00:20:14,915 --> 00:20:17,434 Okay, ready? 473 00:20:17,518 --> 00:20:20,570 Lord rodanthe realizes he's been mortally poisoned. 474 00:20:20,654 --> 00:20:21,638 Here we go! 475 00:20:21,722 --> 00:20:23,774 Oh, god. Are we ready? 476 00:20:23,858 --> 00:20:25,976 This one is gonna be extra lethal. 477 00:20:27,327 --> 00:20:29,495 - Oh! - Oh, my god. Oh, my god. 478 00:20:31,264 --> 00:20:32,515 This is gonna be a ghost pepper. 479 00:20:32,599 --> 00:20:33,850 Here we go. 480 00:20:33,934 --> 00:20:35,786 Oh, god. Are we ready? 481 00:20:35,870 --> 00:20:37,854 This one is gonna be extra lethal. 482 00:20:37,938 --> 00:20:39,656 Okay, you've been poisoned. 483 00:20:39,740 --> 00:20:41,391 Oh, trust me, you're never gonna forget this. 484 00:20:45,079 --> 00:20:46,729 Again, James, you volunteered. 485 00:20:49,683 --> 00:20:50,733 Oh! Alright, great. 486 00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:52,602 Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Mm! 487 00:20:52,686 --> 00:20:54,404 Oh, my god. Okay. 488 00:20:54,488 --> 00:20:57,073 Oh! Here we go. 489 00:20:57,157 --> 00:20:58,809 My dear... 490 00:20:58,893 --> 00:20:59,810 ...You must not leave me here 491 00:20:59,894 --> 00:21:01,478 To fend for myself amongst the crows. 492 00:21:01,562 --> 00:21:04,614 Curse that viper, lord red stone. 493 00:21:04,698 --> 00:21:06,617 I spit on his name. Ooh! 494 00:21:06,701 --> 00:21:10,620 And I-I fear it was my... 495 00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:14,290 Use it, use it. You've been poisoned. 496 00:21:14,374 --> 00:21:16,559 - I fear... - Oh, my god. I can't. 497 00:21:16,643 --> 00:21:18,228 I fear it was, my darling, 498 00:21:18,312 --> 00:21:20,363 That blackguard robed in men's dress. 499 00:21:20,447 --> 00:21:21,631 Oh, my god. 500 00:21:21,715 --> 00:21:23,099 Is he gonna die? 501 00:21:23,183 --> 00:21:24,767 He does look poisoned. 502 00:21:30,056 --> 00:21:33,109 I fear not, my love. 503 00:21:37,664 --> 00:21:39,982 I wish for your... 504 00:21:40,066 --> 00:21:41,384 Okay. Don't use it all at once. 505 00:21:41,468 --> 00:21:42,519 Oh, my god. Pace it out. 506 00:21:45,940 --> 00:21:48,791 Grieve not, my darling, 507 00:21:48,875 --> 00:21:52,863 For I leave this realm without fear of pain. 508 00:21:56,016 --> 00:21:58,801 Seasonal... season... 509 00:21:58,885 --> 00:22:00,403 That was awesome. Wow! 510 00:22:00,487 --> 00:22:03,473 Am I killing it or what? 511 00:22:03,557 --> 00:22:05,475 Murray. Murray, you're a god! 512 00:22:05,559 --> 00:22:08,010 I was the best of the class. 513 00:22:09,696 --> 00:22:10,681 This is the last one. 514 00:22:10,765 --> 00:22:13,550 David, when the student is ready, the master appears. 515 00:22:13,634 --> 00:22:15,285 Here you go to be in scenes. 516 00:22:15,369 --> 00:22:18,955 We're gonna elevate this. So, you do this. 517 00:22:19,039 --> 00:22:20,156 What's that? 518 00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:22,559 We're gonna superglue both fingers together. 519 00:22:22,643 --> 00:22:23,826 What's that? 520 00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:27,230 I'm just gonna krazy glue my fingers 521 00:22:27,314 --> 00:22:28,831 Interlocking right now? 522 00:22:28,915 --> 00:22:30,100 What's the words? What do we say? 523 00:22:30,184 --> 00:22:32,703 - Use it. Use it. - Use it. 524 00:22:32,787 --> 00:22:35,505 Look at Murr. He's starting to get real beat down, man. 525 00:22:35,589 --> 00:22:36,773 Dave can't find his wallet 526 00:22:36,857 --> 00:22:40,176 While out to dinner with his fianceé. 527 00:22:40,260 --> 00:22:41,378 Are your hands stuck together, bitch? 528 00:22:42,929 --> 00:22:45,448 This is how we send Murray home packing right now. 529 00:22:45,532 --> 00:22:46,917 - Is this your wallet? - Yes, sir. 530 00:22:47,001 --> 00:22:49,635 Okay. We take this and... 531 00:22:50,805 --> 00:22:51,922 No, no. 532 00:22:52,006 --> 00:22:55,258 Oh, my god! Oh, my god! 533 00:22:55,342 --> 00:22:58,595 Oh, my god! 534 00:22:58,679 --> 00:22:59,529 You can't pay. That sucks, right? 535 00:22:59,613 --> 00:23:01,732 I can't use it now. 536 00:23:01,816 --> 00:23:04,334 You just cut my real credit cards. 537 00:23:04,418 --> 00:23:05,602 I know. Sit. Let's use it. 538 00:23:05,686 --> 00:23:07,203 Feel it, feel it, feel it. Ready? 539 00:23:07,287 --> 00:23:09,139 - Yes. - I can't believe what just happened. 540 00:23:09,223 --> 00:23:11,874 Dave reaches for his wallet, pats his pants, shirt pocket, 541 00:23:11,958 --> 00:23:12,943 Can't find nothing but lint. 542 00:23:13,027 --> 00:23:13,944 Shoot! What? 543 00:23:14,028 --> 00:23:17,147 I don't have my wallet. Again? 544 00:23:17,231 --> 00:23:19,082 This is all my fault! 545 00:23:19,166 --> 00:23:20,951 Of course it's your fault. Who else's fault would it be? 546 00:23:21,035 --> 00:23:22,552 Let's see what we got. 547 00:23:25,039 --> 00:23:26,356 Look at the... look at them. 548 00:23:26,440 --> 00:23:28,474 You have to use this. You cannot cut... 549 00:23:28,559 --> 00:23:30,093 I know. I get it. Okay, but we can cut that one. 550 00:23:30,177 --> 00:23:32,095 No, no, no, no, no! That's my debit. 551 00:23:33,647 --> 00:23:35,298 We didn't even tell him to do it. 552 00:23:35,382 --> 00:23:36,366 Dave's going rogue. 553 00:23:36,450 --> 00:23:38,568 You can't pay. Let's go. Let's do the scene. 554 00:23:38,652 --> 00:23:39,770 Yes, let's do it! 555 00:23:39,854 --> 00:23:41,638 Oh, shoot! What? 556 00:23:41,722 --> 00:23:43,306 I don't have my wallet! 557 00:23:43,390 --> 00:23:44,736 What's wrong with your hands? 558 00:23:47,928 --> 00:23:49,512 Yes! 559 00:23:49,596 --> 00:23:52,115 And scene. 560 00:23:52,199 --> 00:23:55,786 - Oh, my god. - Jesus Christ, that was awesome. 561 00:23:55,870 --> 00:23:57,654 Thank you. 562 00:23:57,738 --> 00:23:59,389 Alright, David. Great job, buddy. 563 00:23:59,473 --> 00:24:01,858 Now take your seat, James. Take your seat. 564 00:24:01,942 --> 00:24:02,942 Nailed it. 39571

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