Original subtitles

Walking sucks.

Yeah.

We should have, like, a limo.

Yeah.

That would be cool.

Then we could, like, have chicks in the back.

Yeah. We could have lots of chicks on the back, and then we could, like, sit

front and drive.

That would rule.

Yeah. Hey, check it out.

Look at that.

Uh.

Uh. Bart.

Uh. Fort.

Fortune.

Fortune teller.

Yeah. Maybe we should go in there and tell her our fortune.

That would be cool.

No, dumbass.

She tells your fortune.

Oh, yeah. Cool.

Um, what's that?

You know, like your future.

Oh, yeah. Cool.

What's that?

Uh, I don't know.

Yes,

yes, yes, yes, rock, rock.

Sit your ass down, Lars.

Play the drums like you're supposed to.

Shut up, buddy.

Check it out, I was at this concert. Coming up here, Lars points to me.

See, he said, there's Viva, see? And there he is, right there, see?

Beavis, you've never been to a concert in your life.

Shut up, butthead. Your mom's a slut.

Beavis, tell it to Buck.

He's never made out with a chick, either.

Shut up, butthead. Shut up.

That James Hetfield dude looks like the Cowardly

Lion. Shut up, butthead.

He kicks ass.

You're a cowardly lying fuck, Viva.

I'm talking about James Petfield.

He rules.

Yes,

yes. Metallica rules.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Not really, Viva.

Shut up, butthead. Just because you think something doesn't rule doesn't

doesn't.

Yeah.

No.

It sucks.

You know, one more thing about Metallica, I'm gonna slam you in the

Yeah.

Go on with your bad self, Beavis.

See,

like, look inside this dude's nose.

I know, it's cool.

Dumbass. Well, boogers and stuff are pretty cool, but the hair isn't very

I don't know. I think it's cool.

Yeah, but it's like, if you want to rule, you got to be cool, like, all the

time. Like, even when you're taking a dump and stuff, like Guar.

I wasn't saying they're as cool as Guar, but they still rule.

Rule, rule. Take that.

You better not come around here again, Lester, or I'm calling the cops.

Oh, wait.

I got customers.

So, what can I do for you boys?

Hey,

butthead, I thought you were going to tell us about our furniture.

Your future?

All is known to Madame Blavatsky.

It is?

You are student in what they call the high school?

Whoa, she's right, butthead.

How do you know?

Madam Blavatsky, he's old.

Whoa.

I think you are not the A student.

Maybe not the B student. See?

No. No, I don't think so.

Whoa. Yeah.

She's for real, butthead.

Yeah.

She knows all.

You will be a very important man.

Very rich.

Very famous.

A mere word from you will set great wheels in motion.

So?

Will I ever get any chicks?

Stay tuned for Beavis and Butthead with more magical moments.

So, you want to know about women?

Yeah.

Yes, there will be women.

Beautiful women.

They will beg for your favors.

Yes. Cool. Me too.

I see a mansion with many servants.

A yard. I don't see any of that crap.

Whoa. What is it, Beaver?

Cool.

There's like this big war. It's like all these people are running around and

stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's like there's a bunch of wrecked cars. And it's like people screaming.

Yeah.

It's true.

The boy has his sight.

Now there's a helicopter.

And these army guys are getting out.

End of time.

Yeah. And they got this tank. And they're like blowing stuff up.

The end of the world.

Yeah. The end of the world. The end of the world.

Cool.

Look at that.

Cool.

Cool.

And so the bloodshed continues here despite international outcry.

This is Wolf Jekyll of CNN.

Whoa.

You're pretty cool, Beavis. Yeah, yeah.

Thanks. I'm pretty cool.

Whoa, that's a big -ass skull, Venus. I mean, but I can't...

Who

is this?

Uh... Is that that Toyota Jackson chick?

Yeah, it's like... It's like it's Toyota Jackson dressed up like Wonder Woman.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, no.

Yeah, no.

No, no.

Ah!

Get away!

Get away!

Ah!

Oh, my God.

Is this, like, a joke?

Yeah, yeah.

She's got one of those bathing caps on. Oh, yeah.

Hey,

what's that noise?

I think it's that chick.

Oh, yeah.

Telling the future is cool.

I didn't know you were a psychic.

Yeah, yeah.

Don't you remember all those tests the school nurse made me take?

No, Beavis. They said you were psycho.

Oh, yeah.

Hey, Beavis. I can predict the future, too. Check this out.

I predict that someone will smack you upside the head.

No, hey, butthead.

You can't predict the future.

Cut it out, butthole.

Hey, cut it out.

He wouldn't change it.

Come on, it sucks.

Let's just cool out for a minute, Beavis.

Come

on, butthead.

It sucks.

It sucks now, but, like, there's something cool later.

Really? Yeah, just cool out.

Come on, butthead. It sucks. What happened?

Uh,

it's like it sucks and sucks and that's like it's over.

It's really cool.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

I can hardly wait till it's over. This is gonna be cool.

Yeah, yeah.

Wake up, butthole.

You're gonna miss the cool part.

Oh, thanks.

Is it over yet?

Here it comes.

Yeah. Yeah.

Cool. Yeah.

It's over.

Yeah. That was cool.