Original subtitles

Hey, Beaver, you want to, like, do something?

Yeah, yeah, cool.

Let's go bowling.

We can't.

We don't have any money.

Let's get nachos. Yeah, yeah, nachos.

Beaver? Yeah, let's get dirty magazines.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Beaver, you butt monkey.

We can't get any of that stuff without money.

Let's get some of that then.

Yeah.

Money is cool.

Wait a minute.

I have seen the way.

Yeah, yeah, that way.

Teenage metal chicks are cool.

Yeah, I like them.

Jump, jump. Yeah, yeah.

Jump. Yeah.

Check it out, Steven.

Jabba the Hutt. Yeah, that's cool.

Ozzy rules.

Yeah, this is the best concert in Vegas.

Ozzy kicks ass in Vegas.

I wouldn't listen.

I learned how to fight.

I opened up my mind for a reason.

But just like the wounded, I'm ready today.

They'll remember.

They'll surrender. She's gonna turn into a monster.

Yeah.

That's cool.

Whoa, that was cool.

Yeah, that's cool.

Uh,

excuse me.

We'd like some money.

Yes, money.

A withdrawal.

Okay, how much?

Uh... A million dollars?

Yeah, me too.

Uh, do you have an account with this bank?

You know, you need an account in order to withdraw money.

Uh, we'd like one of those, too.

Tell me, how much do you know about banking?

Uh, well, there's like a safe where you can get stuck in it and die.

Yeah, yeah, that's cool.

I don't know what they're teaching in those schools. Sometimes a guy, like,

blows up the safe.

But the institution of banking is the foundation on which our whole economy

stands. Uh, could you, like, shut up and give us the money?

Yeah.

Yeah, money.

Yeah, yeah. Not you.

Not you.

Mr. Gluckman?

Yes, I'm Bank Officer Gluckman. We have a warrant for your arrest.

The charge is embezzlement.

Oh. Well, there's some mistake.

I've been an officer of the bank for 15 years.

My record is impeccable.

Ask anyone.

Hey, where are you going? Stop right now! We've got him, boys.

That leads right to the roof.

The only way out is a five -story jump to certain death.

Banking is cool.

I'll never go to jail!

Come any closer, and I'll jump!

I mean it!

I actually hope he jumps.

God, I'm so ashamed.

What kind of person am I watching this?

This is gonna be cool.

Hey, down in front.

Anything?

Nope. No family, no friends. We need someone up there who knows this guy.

Uh, excuse me.

We know him.

Yeah, he, like, talked to us and stuff.

Oh, okay.

You're on.

This is gonna be cool.

Whoa.

I think there's something wrong with this guy.

Yeah.

What's up with his mouth?

I don't know.

You probably don't know the word. Yeah.

What a dumbass.

They could do this in every single video.

Yeah, yeah. Go for it.

Yes. Go for the hair. The hair. Yeah, yeah. The hair. The hair. The hair. The

hair. Yes.

Yes.

This guy belongs in war.

Yeah, yeah.

Look at him. Look at his eyes.

Look.

This is the coolest of all videos.

Of course, like, you know, if there were some big boobs and stuff, that would be

cool, too.

No,

Steven.

You'd want to keep the boobs.

money slipped through my fingers.

Tens, twenties, fifties, and they all belong to somebody else.

Why don't they make a bill with a clockman on it?

It's so unfair.

Clockman, we got some friends of yours here.

Just get him off the ledge. We'll do the rest.

Don't come any closer or I'll jump.

a little money alone to tide me over.

I was gonna pay it back.

You do believe me.

Uh, yeah.

Would you, like, jump out that way a little?

It's so unfair.

Why don't they go after the real criminals?

Why the fuck?

Yeah, yeah, then you die.

Yeah.

I'm too delicate for prison.

I have to jump, and don't try to talk me out of it.

Uh, okay.

Yeah, we understand.

You do, don't you?

Maybe there are others with your kind of compassion.

Maybe they'll understand.

Maybe they won't be so hard on me.

Yes! I want to live!

What a wuss.

Yes. I guess we don't get our million dollars now.

Yes. This

dude

looks like that assistant football coach.

What are you doing?

Drop it. Give me 20.

What kind of a man are you?

You look like a bunch of girls out there.

Why don't you just go over there and shake your hands and give up right now?

How many fat dudes are there in this band?

Well,

there's at least two.

Yeah.

They need to get a big fat drummer.

Yeah, really.

Like, just a couple big fat dudes dancing around. That would be cool, too.

He's having trouble defecating.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Not anymore.

He just took a dump.