Original subtitles

Lewis and Butthead are not role models. They're not even human. They're

cartoons. Some of the things they do will cause a person to get hurt,

arrested, possibly deported. To put it another way, don't try this at home.

Bueno. Recuerdan, por favor, clase.

Siempre contestan en español.

Bueno.

Señor Butthead, ¿cómo es Juan?

Uh, burritos?

No, no, no. ¿Cómo es Juan?

¿Cómo es Juan?

Uh, guacamole.

No, no. Señor Beavis, ¿cómo es Juan?

Um, spaghetti.

Spaghetti? Spaghetti?

That's Italian, you moron.

Damn it, you idiots have been in this class for almost a whole school year,

the only Spanish you know is what you learned at Taco Bell.

And Beavis can't even get that right.

I'm going to give you little bastards just ten seconds to come up with a

sentence in Spanish, and if you can't, you're both going to the principal's

office and you're both flunking.

Well, I'm waiting.

Principal's office, now!

Taco Supreme.

Get out, now!

What the hell is this crap?

Mine has more bumps.

Hey, Beavis, this guy sounds like you.

Shut up, fart knocker.

That dude's wearing a Yamaha.

He is a loser.

And a pansy. Yeah.

This guy sucks.

So cool.

These guys got no future.

Whoa. She said, uh.

I'm already up.

Is this a commercial?

Yeah.

It's a commercial for MTV's House of Butts.

She thinks better than Wendy Crawford.

Yeah.

It's high noon on my sundial.

I like music.

Eat that cream.

Yeah.

Excuse me, Beavis. I have to go spank my monkey.

Whoa,

that was cool.

It really does happen.

Armijo. Present.

Baca. Yeah.

Butt kiss.

Damn it. What's wrong with you two? We've been in school over seven months

and every single day when I call Daniel Butt Kiss's name, you guys have to

laugh. Is it really still that funny?

Doesn't it ever get old? Are you going to laugh for the rest of your lives

time someone says the name Butt Kiss?

That does it.

Principal's office now.

That any two amoeba are identical twins since they all have the same genetic

makeup. They are all the same sex and can reproduce by themselves.

So all sperm cells contain either an X chromosome or a Y chromosome.

And... She said sperm.

Depending on which sperm cell fertilizes the egg...

I said, depending on which sperm cell fertilizes the egg, the zygote will be

either male or female. Shut up!

Make zickers off this now!

Yes! The butthole surfers! Yes!

The butthole surfers rule!

Look,

it's flea! It's flea! Flea! Flea! Flea!

Animation is cool.

Butthole servers kick ass.

Oh,

you guys think this is funny?

You've been to four classes today and you've been sent here four times.

And this laughing thing. What the hell's with this laughing thing? All the

teachers are sick of it.

Mr. Sherman, your history teacher, says he's completely given up on trying to

teach your class about the gay 90s.

See? See?

Now that's exactly what I'm talking about. You are both suspended for a

Uh, what's that mean?

It means I don't want to see you anywhere near this school for a whole

Cool.

Forget it. No, no, you're not suspended.

No, I've got a better idea. Yeah, I'm going to get you guys this time.

These guys are cool because they can, like, jump around real slow.

Yeah.

That would be cool if we could go to this forest and hang out with these

Yeah.

We could, like, dance in the forest and be cool.

Yeah.

Whoa. Is this, like, the weather channel?

Yeah. The forecast is partially cool.

I wish I was more like them

looked into all the options, and I'm using the Today Sponge.

Is this a Claricelle commercial?

Michael Jackson?

Yeah, that's where he sleeps.

Nah, he told Oprah he doesn't really sleep in the hyperbolic chamber.

He has a skin disease.

Did you watch Oprah?

What a wuss.

Shut up, fuckhole.

I just watched it that once because I thought they'd show his hair on fire.

Yeah, right, Beavis.

Just a hair club member. I'm the president.

Yeah.

He's a member.

Let's try to find a video that doesn't suck.

So, Beavis and Butthead.

I understand Mr.

McVicker has made a little arrangement with you guys. Yeah, a little probation.

You see, class, Beavis and Butthead here are not allowed to laugh for...

That's right, and if they do laugh, they'll be expelled and they'll have to

to Hope High School where they'll get their asses kicked on a daily basis by

the other delinquents. Ha, ha, ha.

Well, I was real glad to hear that because this is Sex Education Week.

That's right, Sex Ed Week.

We're going to be talking about the penis.

We'll be talking about the vagina.

Do you think that's funny, butthead? Do you find it amusing that we'll be

talking... Talking about the testicles.

Yes, we're also going to be talking about venereal disease, sexual

the scrotum, the clitoris, and we will definitely be spending a lot of time

talking about masturbation.

Well, now that that's out of the way, let's take roll.

Then he said penis.

Yeah. Then he said masturbation. Then he said vagina.

That was cool.

Is the defense ready?

Is this that show about that deaf lawyer? Yeah.

Hey,

Beavis.

I'd like to make a motion.

Yeah. Me too.

Yeah. Whoa.

Cop rock rerun.

Yeah. Cop rock rerun.

This is cool.

This is the one where they sing in court.

No way. This is the one where they sing in that locker room.

That's the same show, dumbass. There only was one show.

Yeah, but it was cool.

When you give your heart away, well, take it back.

Take it back. Take it back.

No facts in court. Yeah.

The prostitution rest.

Yeah. Change it. Change it quick.

Whoa.

That fish has a face on his butt.

Yeah, that's cool.

I wish I had a face on my butt.

Yeah, yeah.

You could blow your nose in your underwear.

Yeah, you wouldn't need a hanky.

We should start a band and call it... Butthead, butthead.

Yeah. Beam it, beam it.

This court is now in session.

I know you've been sworn, sir, and I have read your complaint.

It's my turn to be the judge, asswipe.

Oh, yeah.

Okay.

This court is now in session.

How do you please to these charges of...

And buzzing around and getting in my face and stuff.

How do you please to these charges against you?

The defense rests.

Shut up!

Okay.

I hereby sentence the defendant to death by... Death

by... Saw off his...

tweeter

cool

yeah now this is what

death rock is all about yeah

Drums, guitars, and death.

They finally got it right.