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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,040
Lewis and Butthead are not role models.
They're not even human. They're
2
00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:06,920
cartoons. Some of the things they do
will cause a person to get hurt,
3
00:00:07,180 --> 00:00:11,600
arrested, possibly deported. To put it
another way, don't try this at home.
4
00:00:31,919 --> 00:00:34,600
Bueno. Recuerdan, por favor, clase.
5
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Siempre contestan en español.
6
00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:38,280
Bueno.
7
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Señor Butthead, ¿cómo es Juan?
8
00:00:44,900 --> 00:00:47,280
Uh, burritos?
9
00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:50,060
No, no, no. ¿Cómo es Juan?
10
00:00:50,340 --> 00:00:51,340
¿Cómo es Juan?
11
00:00:51,500 --> 00:00:54,040
Uh, guacamole.
12
00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:57,360
No, no. Señor Beavis, ¿cómo es Juan?
13
00:00:58,180 --> 00:00:59,940
Um, spaghetti.
14
00:01:01,720 --> 00:01:02,720
Spaghetti? Spaghetti?
15
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That's Italian, you moron.
16
00:01:05,400 --> 00:01:09,260
Damn it, you idiots have been in this
class for almost a whole school year,
17
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the only Spanish you know is what you
learned at Taco Bell.
18
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And Beavis can't even get that right.
19
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I'm going to give you little bastards
just ten seconds to come up with a
20
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sentence in Spanish, and if you can't,
you're both going to the principal's
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office and you're both flunking.
22
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Well, I'm waiting.
23
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Principal's office, now!
24
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Taco Supreme.
25
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Get out, now!
26
00:01:45,750 --> 00:01:48,150
What the hell is this crap?
27
00:01:51,250 --> 00:01:52,950
Mine has more bumps.
28
00:02:02,440 --> 00:02:05,220
Hey, Beavis, this guy sounds like you.
29
00:02:05,860 --> 00:02:07,480
Shut up, fart knocker.
30
00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:16,360
That dude's wearing a Yamaha.
31
00:02:19,700 --> 00:02:25,720
He is a loser.
32
00:02:26,860 --> 00:02:28,860
And a pansy. Yeah.
33
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This guy sucks.
34
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So cool.
35
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These guys got no future.
36
00:03:16,140 --> 00:03:18,200
Whoa. She said, uh.
37
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I'm already up.
38
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Is this a commercial?
39
00:03:41,160 --> 00:03:42,160
Yeah.
40
00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:46,120
It's a commercial for MTV's House of
Butts.
41
00:03:47,600 --> 00:03:49,780
She thinks better than Wendy Crawford.
42
00:03:50,140 --> 00:03:51,140
Yeah.
43
00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:53,220
It's high noon on my sundial.
44
00:03:56,140 --> 00:04:02,820
I like music.
45
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Eat that cream.
46
00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:10,720
Yeah.
47
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Excuse me, Beavis. I have to go spank my
monkey.
48
00:04:31,240 --> 00:04:32,240
Whoa,
49
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:36,120
that was cool.
50
00:04:36,380 --> 00:04:37,940
It really does happen.
51
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Armijo. Present.
52
00:04:49,530 --> 00:04:50,650
Baca. Yeah.
53
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Butt kiss.
54
00:04:54,630 --> 00:05:00,490
Damn it. What's wrong with you two?
We've been in school over seven months
55
00:05:00,590 --> 00:05:04,550
and every single day when I call Daniel
Butt Kiss's name, you guys have to
56
00:05:04,550 --> 00:05:06,490
laugh. Is it really still that funny?
57
00:05:07,150 --> 00:05:10,990
Doesn't it ever get old? Are you going
to laugh for the rest of your lives
58
00:05:10,990 --> 00:05:13,090
time someone says the name Butt Kiss?
59
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That does it.
60
00:05:16,980 --> 00:05:18,360
Principal's office now.
61
00:05:21,640 --> 00:05:26,440
That any two amoeba are identical twins
since they all have the same genetic
62
00:05:26,440 --> 00:05:30,240
makeup. They are all the same sex and
can reproduce by themselves.
63
00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:36,040
So all sperm cells contain either an X
chromosome or a Y chromosome.
64
00:05:36,300 --> 00:05:38,480
And... She said sperm.
65
00:05:39,220 --> 00:05:42,720
Depending on which sperm cell fertilizes
the egg...
66
00:05:43,080 --> 00:05:48,520
I said, depending on which sperm cell
fertilizes the egg, the zygote will be
67
00:05:48,520 --> 00:05:51,140
either male or female. Shut up!
68
00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:56,060
Make zickers off this now!
69
00:05:57,780 --> 00:06:01,260
Yes! The butthole surfers! Yes!
70
00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:03,600
The butthole surfers rule!
71
00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:07,960
Look,
72
00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:11,540
it's flea! It's flea! Flea! Flea! Flea!
73
00:06:31,770 --> 00:06:33,770
Animation is cool.
74
00:07:48,330 --> 00:07:50,270
Butthole servers kick ass.
75
00:07:53,310 --> 00:07:54,310
Oh,
76
00:07:56,390 --> 00:08:01,390
you guys think this is funny?
77
00:08:02,070 --> 00:08:05,930
You've been to four classes today and
you've been sent here four times.
78
00:08:07,070 --> 00:08:10,990
And this laughing thing. What the hell's
with this laughing thing? All the
79
00:08:10,990 --> 00:08:12,030
teachers are sick of it.
80
00:08:12,330 --> 00:08:16,550
Mr. Sherman, your history teacher, says
he's completely given up on trying to
81
00:08:16,550 --> 00:08:19,070
teach your class about the gay 90s.
82
00:08:19,890 --> 00:08:20,970
See? See?
83
00:08:21,230 --> 00:08:26,610
Now that's exactly what I'm talking
about. You are both suspended for a
84
00:08:27,610 --> 00:08:30,510
Uh, what's that mean?
85
00:08:31,550 --> 00:08:38,030
It means I don't want to see you
anywhere near this school for a whole
86
00:08:38,390 --> 00:08:39,390
Cool.
87
00:08:45,160 --> 00:08:47,560
Forget it. No, no, you're not suspended.
88
00:08:47,840 --> 00:08:53,940
No, I've got a better idea. Yeah, I'm
going to get you guys this time.
89
00:09:35,630 --> 00:09:38,630
These guys are cool because they can,
like, jump around real slow.
90
00:09:38,870 --> 00:09:39,870
Yeah.
91
00:09:40,910 --> 00:09:45,050
That would be cool if we could go to
this forest and hang out with these
92
00:09:45,330 --> 00:09:46,330
Yeah.
93
00:09:46,470 --> 00:09:49,150
We could, like, dance in the forest and
be cool.
94
00:09:49,350 --> 00:09:50,350
Yeah.
95
00:09:55,190 --> 00:09:57,810
Whoa. Is this, like, the weather
channel?
96
00:09:59,030 --> 00:10:02,090
Yeah. The forecast is partially cool.
97
00:10:44,240 --> 00:10:45,380
I wish I was more like them
98
00:11:16,810 --> 00:11:20,070
looked into all the options, and I'm
using the Today Sponge.
99
00:12:01,780 --> 00:12:04,420
Is this a Claricelle commercial?
100
00:13:10,830 --> 00:13:11,830
Michael Jackson?
101
00:13:12,670 --> 00:13:13,850
Yeah, that's where he sleeps.
102
00:13:14,950 --> 00:13:17,970
Nah, he told Oprah he doesn't really
sleep in the hyperbolic chamber.
103
00:13:18,890 --> 00:13:20,090
He has a skin disease.
104
00:13:21,550 --> 00:13:22,870
Did you watch Oprah?
105
00:13:26,310 --> 00:13:27,530
What a wuss.
106
00:13:28,410 --> 00:13:29,550
Shut up, fuckhole.
107
00:13:30,550 --> 00:13:33,510
I just watched it that once because I
thought they'd show his hair on fire.
108
00:13:35,630 --> 00:13:37,370
Yeah, right, Beavis.
109
00:13:49,390 --> 00:13:51,510
Just a hair club member. I'm the
president.
110
00:13:51,730 --> 00:13:52,730
Yeah.
111
00:13:53,630 --> 00:13:54,730
He's a member.
112
00:14:00,150 --> 00:14:02,610
Let's try to find a video that doesn't
suck.
113
00:14:05,270 --> 00:14:07,610
So, Beavis and Butthead.
114
00:14:08,290 --> 00:14:09,650
I understand Mr.
115
00:14:09,850 --> 00:14:13,630
McVicker has made a little arrangement
with you guys. Yeah, a little probation.
116
00:14:14,390 --> 00:14:19,190
You see, class, Beavis and Butthead here
are not allowed to laugh for...
117
00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:24,840
That's right, and if they do laugh,
they'll be expelled and they'll have to
118
00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:29,180
to Hope High School where they'll get
their asses kicked on a daily basis by
119
00:14:29,180 --> 00:14:30,920
the other delinquents. Ha, ha, ha.
120
00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:36,960
Well, I was real glad to hear that
because this is Sex Education Week.
121
00:14:37,580 --> 00:14:39,600
That's right, Sex Ed Week.
122
00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:42,460
We're going to be talking about the
penis.
123
00:14:43,440 --> 00:14:45,380
We'll be talking about the vagina.
124
00:14:45,980 --> 00:14:50,200
Do you think that's funny, butthead? Do
you find it amusing that we'll be
125
00:14:50,200 --> 00:14:51,770
talking... Talking about the testicles.
126
00:14:52,390 --> 00:14:57,950
Yes, we're also going to be talking
about venereal disease, sexual
127
00:14:58,030 --> 00:15:04,890
the scrotum, the clitoris, and we will
definitely be spending a lot of time
128
00:15:04,890 --> 00:15:07,070
talking about masturbation.
129
00:15:11,390 --> 00:15:14,250
Well, now that that's out of the way,
let's take roll.
130
00:15:39,110 --> 00:15:40,970
Then he said penis.
131
00:15:42,210 --> 00:15:46,970
Yeah. Then he said masturbation. Then he
said vagina.
132
00:15:47,450 --> 00:15:48,750
That was cool.
133
00:15:52,270 --> 00:15:53,910
Is the defense ready?
134
00:15:54,130 --> 00:15:56,690
Is this that show about that deaf
lawyer? Yeah.
135
00:15:57,890 --> 00:15:58,890
Hey,
136
00:15:59,230 --> 00:16:00,230
Beavis.
137
00:16:00,870 --> 00:16:02,410
I'd like to make a motion.
138
00:16:02,670 --> 00:16:04,510
Yeah. Me too.
139
00:16:10,280 --> 00:16:11,280
Yeah. Whoa.
140
00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:13,240
Cop rock rerun.
141
00:16:13,600 --> 00:16:15,800
Yeah. Cop rock rerun.
142
00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:17,800
This is cool.
143
00:16:19,040 --> 00:16:21,940
This is the one where they sing in
court.
144
00:16:23,300 --> 00:16:25,700
No way. This is the one where they sing
in that locker room.
145
00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:29,800
That's the same show, dumbass. There
only was one show.
146
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:31,000
Yeah, but it was cool.
147
00:16:36,430 --> 00:16:39,170
When you give your heart away, well,
take it back.
148
00:16:39,470 --> 00:16:41,230
Take it back. Take it back.
149
00:16:44,190 --> 00:16:47,530
No facts in court. Yeah.
150
00:16:50,290 --> 00:16:54,250
The prostitution rest.
151
00:16:54,530 --> 00:16:56,470
Yeah. Change it. Change it quick.
152
00:17:04,849 --> 00:17:05,849
Whoa.
153
00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:08,859
That fish has a face on his butt.
154
00:17:10,619 --> 00:17:12,540
Yeah, that's cool.
155
00:17:13,740 --> 00:17:15,619
I wish I had a face on my butt.
156
00:17:15,819 --> 00:17:16,819
Yeah, yeah.
157
00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:19,540
You could blow your nose in your
underwear.
158
00:17:21,339 --> 00:17:23,000
Yeah, you wouldn't need a hanky.
159
00:17:31,560 --> 00:17:37,460
We should start a band and call it...
Butthead, butthead.
160
00:17:37,720 --> 00:17:41,040
Yeah. Beam it, beam it.
161
00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:27,120
This court is now in session.
162
00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:31,560
I know you've been sworn, sir, and I
have read your complaint.
163
00:18:33,540 --> 00:18:35,760
It's my turn to be the judge, asswipe.
164
00:18:37,100 --> 00:18:38,100
Oh, yeah.
165
00:18:39,300 --> 00:18:40,300
Okay.
166
00:18:41,020 --> 00:18:43,060
This court is now in session.
167
00:18:44,460 --> 00:18:47,360
How do you please to these charges of...
168
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:57,860
And buzzing around and getting in my
face and stuff.
169
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:02,400
How do you please to these charges
against you?
170
00:19:03,360 --> 00:19:04,600
The defense rests.
171
00:19:08,860 --> 00:19:09,920
Shut up!
172
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,000
Okay.
173
00:19:12,460 --> 00:19:18,420
I hereby sentence the defendant to death
by... Death
174
00:19:18,420 --> 00:19:25,100
by... Saw off his...
175
00:19:25,160 --> 00:19:25,560
tweeter
176
00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:35,120
cool
177
00:19:35,120 --> 00:19:42,040
yeah now this is what
178
00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:44,220
death rock is all about yeah
179
00:19:56,810 --> 00:19:58,110
Drums, guitars, and death.
180
00:19:58,930 --> 00:20:00,810
They finally got it right.
12365
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