Original subtitles

So I told him if you were truly comfortable with your own masculinity,

wouldn't be so threatened by my macrame.

Bravo. It sounds like you really asserted yourself there in a positive,

constructive way.

Want to come back to my house for a cup of coffee?

Why, yes. I'd love to go back to your house.

Whoa.

She said love.

Yeah, yeah.

Now he's going to take her home.

Hey, Beavis.

Let's follow him until they do it.

Yeah, yeah.

This is going to be cool.

You want to tell me what this is all about?

You want to tell me what this is all about?

The reason I brought you here is I want to do you.

Oh, yeah.

This is from that movie where, like, you know, that white chick goes into the

hood and teaches everybody how to get good grades.

Oh, yeah.

They always have movies like that where there's this teacher and there's, like,

all good and, like, everybody, like, stops being a gangsta and then they

Good grades and go to college.

Yeah.

And then it's like, you know, she, like, makes a difference or something.

Yeah, that's really stupid.

Yeah.

They should make a movie that's, like, you know, realistic.

Uh -huh. Where it's like, you know, the teacher sucks.

Nobody learns anything.

Uh -huh. And then in the end, it's like, you just be all stupid.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, that would rule.

And then it's like... Then, see, then you could have, like, some cars blowing

and stuff.

Then you could, like, show some boobs, you know, and, like, a big chase scene,

you know.

You know, a while ago when Coolio said,

I see myself in the pistol smoke, he stole that from Snoop Doggy Dogg.

Yeah, see, that's why, to me, teaching is really a two -way street.

I learn from my students as well.

Yeah, that's wonderful.

Van Draytham's gonna gore.

Must really want it.

That sucks.

Check it out, Beavis. A window.

Yeah. Cool.

Whoa.

He's taking our clothes off.

Whoa. Cool.

Take it off.

Take it all off.

Yeah, hey, hey. Do our underwear next.

Oh, no. Now he's getting naked.

This is pretty cool.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go for it. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Do it. Do it. Go for it,

dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do it. Do it! Do it! Do it!

I wish he'd hurry up and do it instead of just putting his arm around her.

Yeah, really. Come on! Grab her thingies! Come on!

Yeah. Grab his schlong!

Yeah! Yeah, come on! Wait.

I thought I heard something.

Hmm. I don't think I heard anything.

Would you mind pulling the shades? I don't want to feel like we're putting on

show for the neighbors.

Yeah, why don't I do that?

Wait a minute.

Hey, hey, hey.

Hey, hey, come on, damn it, I can't see. Hey.

This sucks.

Damn it. This sucks. It sucks. Pull the damn shade back up.

They're probably doing it right now. We can't even watch.

Damn it, the next time we see them, it'll be all over.

We should just, like, ring the doorbell and demand they let us watch.

Hey.

Where is she?

Is she naked?

Beavis and Butthead.

What a surprise.

We want to watch.

Come on.

You'd like to watch what?

You know, you and that chick doing it.

Yeah, yeah.

I mean, we don't even have to come in. If you could just, like, put the shades

back up, that'd be fine with me.

Boys, this really bothers me, okay?

Now, after school Monday, I'll set aside some time to discuss this with you, but

until then, I'd appreciate it if you'd respect my privacy, okay?

Oh, wait. Hey, hey. Come on. Come on.

Dad, we came all the way over here. Come on.

Yeah.

You owe us.

Come on, guys.

Respect my boundaries, okay?

We want to see something.

Yeah, damn it.

Hey,

that's that dude from Nirvana.

I don't think that dude's with us anymore.

I'm talking about the drummer, dumbass.

Um, hey, I've never seen that drummer before in my life.

Yeah, that's not him.

No butt munch.

I'm talking about the drummer from Nirvana is playing guitar here.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah, you're right.

You know what, man?

These are kind of, you know, like nice colors, you know? They're all orangey

kind of pretty and stuff.

Uh, Beavis?

Do you like swing on that side now?

Uh, me?

Do I swing? No, I haven't been to the swing since I was like eight years old.

Uh, me?

I don't even think we have a swing set anymore.

What are you talking about?

Uh, never mind, Beavis.

Tell me that.

Why are all these dudes dressed up in white?

I think it's like they all drive ice cream trucks.

Yeah, that would be cool.

You know, like instead of that dorky music the ice cream truck plays, if they

played this.

Yeah. And then they take the ice cream and just throw it at you and scream.

Yeah. And then you, like, drive the ice cream truck across your lawn. You just

tear ass. And you're like, I don't know you.

Guys, I'm really disappointed in you. We're disappointed in you.

It's like, you pull down the shades like you're gonna do it, and then it turns

out you're not even naked.

Yeah, really. What about the chick? Is she naked? Where is she?

Come on, buddy. Let's go find her.

Um, what's going on, David?

David.

Hey, baby.

If things don't, like, work out with David...

Maybe you and I could, you know.

What the hell are you talking about?

Come on, Joan, don't worry about it. I'll drive you back to your place.

Yeah, baby.

Because it's like, if we were on a date, we'd already be naked by now.

Yeah, yeah, and you would too.

Cool.

So are you guys going to, like, do it in the van?

Hurry up! We don't have all day.

Hey, Beavis, we should follow them to her place.

I bet they'd do it there.

Yeah, yeah.

Cool.

I wish I would have met you. Oh, no.

Just look at this crap.

It's like another one of those videos.

Where you don't even remember it right after you saw it.

You can't remember any videos right after you saw them, Viva.

Yeah, I can.

That's how I know this is one of those videos.

I'm getting tired of seeing all these videos where it's all out of focus and

it's all blurry and blobby and a bunch of art crap.

Yeah. Yeah, really.

Art? Fuck.

Damn it, now it's rocking.

Damn it.

Now all of a sudden this video has to go and be cool right when I'm trying to

get some damn sleep.

Yeah, really.

If they're going to rock and kick ass, at least it should happen while we're

awake. Damn it.

I still have all this glory crap.

Well, you know, at least the music is in focus.

Oh, yeah.

I think this is a buzz clip.

You know, I mean, I always thought, you know, like a buzz clip, like was where

on me.

You know, like they have something in the end.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

Hey,

man, nice shot.

Stay tuned as Butthead discovers a mysterious growth in his pants.

Coming up next.

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