Original subtitles

Let me remind you, class, that this will be on the test, okay?

So then the other dude's like, excuse me, sir.

What I said was, put a flower in your buttonhole.

Attention all students and faculty.

I have an urgent announcement, and you all need to listen very carefully.

That dude looks like he put a flower in your buttonhole.

Your buttonhole.

Highland High has just received a bomb threat.

We are asking all students and teachers to cooperate in the total and immediate

evacuation of the school.

Okay,

class, let's not panic in making our exit. See if you can utilize the

we learned last week about synergy and click.

So it's like he said, excuse me, sir.

I thought it put a flower in your buttonhole.

It's like he was supposed to put it in his buttonhole.

But he put it in his butt.

Uh... Did it, like, get quiet?

What?

Um... This is Sandal Weisberger.

bringing you a chilling expose on a violent new platform threatening the

driver of our nation's youth. I don't know.

Join me. Whoa.

This dude should, like, get a better apartment. Yeah, it's like, we may not

millionaires, but it's like, at least we have decent places to live.

Uh, no we don't. Oh, yeah, well, at least we're pretty happy.

No, we're not.

Well, at least we have, like, lots of friends.

Eh, not really.

Are we healthy?

No.

Our life, fuck.

Yeah. We're cool.

These dampers are pretty cool.

Yeah, but it's like, they're too easy.

Check this out.

Remember this one?

How about this one?

Next

time we

go to a dam, I'm going to, like, pull down my pants and ask a chick to do the

gorilla.

Eva, the only dance you know is the monkey.

Oh, yeah.

I'm going to go do the monkey right now.

A bomb.

Yeah, yeah. A bomb. A bomb.

Cool.

I bet if we had our own bomb, we could, like, you know, blow stuff up.

Yeah, yeah.

That would rule.

Hey, Beavis.

Let's find it. Yeah, let's find it.

Hey, Butt -It.

I bet if we had a bomb, Pantera would hang out with us.

Yeah. We could make him hang out with us.

Come on, let's find it.

Where is it?

Nope, it's not in here.

It's not in here.

Snake.

Here, Bob.

Come on.

Right over here. Hey, Bela.

When we find it, we should, like, go to one of those banks and then, like, blow

up the safe where they keep all the money and stuff.

He bought it! He bought it! I found it! I found the bomb!

Beavis, you dill hole, that's not a bomb.

That's, like, one of those things, you know, like we have one at Burger World.

Oh, yeah.

Uh, hey, Beavis, listen.

Um, what?

Where the hell is this bomb?

It could have been blowing stuff up by now.

Hey, put it, put it, check it out. I found the bomb. I found the bomb.

Whoa.

Give it here, monkey spank. No way, butt knocker. I'm the one who found it.

Give it back.

Damn it, Beaver. Hey, you two! Put that down!

Now! Uh, no.

We were here first. Come on, boys. You're holding a bomb.

Don't do anything stupid.

Uh... Do you idiots even realize the danger you're

in? Uh, no.

Uh, that's fucked.

Yeah, really.

What a wussy bomb.

That's not a bomb, you morons. It's just a damn cooking timer.

It wasn't even loud.

Yeah, really.

There's like no destruction.

Yeah.

Okay,

we've got chicks. We've got computer stuff.

I think this is going to be some kind of chick in the future video.

Yeah, as long as they're in my future, that's cool.

I see a hand in your future, Beavis.

Your hand.

Okay.

Oh, it's him! It's him! It's a Rickalot! Oh, yeah.

Cool.

You hardly ever see this dude on TV.

I'm just going to listen.

Yeah, really.

He might talk about butts again.

This guy rules.

Yeah.

See? See? He said he still likes butts. See? Yeah.

Whoa.

It's like, he's got all these chicks around him who would probably do it with

him. And all he talks about is how he's going to ride one of those bikes.

I don't know, buddy. Those bikes look pretty cool.

Yeah, you can go ride one of those bikes and I'll be scoring.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that would be cool. I mean... No!

Dumbass.

You know,

like, sometimes when I think about my dad...

I always imagined that he'd sir mix a lot.

What do you wish, Beaver? Your dad was probably that roadie for the Marshall

Tucker band.

No way, buddy.

That guy could have been your dad, too, you know.

Oh, yeah.

Get him on camera.

I'm on ya. I'm on ya.

We in the house.

Get it on camera.

Well, we searched the premises, but we came up empty. Now the bomb squad's

telling us it's only a hoax.

What are you talking about?

Any imbecile can see a bomb went off in here.

The man on the phone said it was placed in the cafeteria last night.

We'll keep looking, but with this mess, it could take a while.

What about you two? What happened in here?

Uh,

a bomb went off, sir.

So,

uh, can we go home now?

We're scared and stuff.

Yeah, I guess.

Get on your way, boys.

That was cool.

Hey, buddy, I know I talk about turds a lot, but, boy, these things really look

like turds.

I talk a lot about turds, too, Bela. Don't worry about it.

Oh, okay.

Your anus is

cool.

Yeah, yeah, thanks.

My anus is pretty cool.

Damn it, Beaver. Shut up.

I was talking about the planet.

Whoa, check it out. A flying poop tart.

They had to do that. They had to make them, you know, like poop tarts. You put

them in the toaster.

Then when they popped out, they'd go poop.

Yeah.

Stop the car, dude.

I just thought of something.

You know what would be funny?

While they were driving under that girl like that, you know, since they have a

convertible, you know what? It would have been funny if she pooped on them.

Okay, Beaver.

That's enough about poop.

I'll just talk about wee -wee.

Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle.

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