Original subtitles

Nausea again.

That horrible clawing, pounding, aching.

Me too.

It couldn't be morning sickness.

But what about these cravings?

My God.

I'd better not be pregnant.

Dang.

I'm not toast.

Contractions.

Contractions.

They're coming out.

I can feel it.

Hey, buddy.

When people get pregnant, they have to be chicks, right?

Huh?

What is all that stuff?

It's ugly.

Yeah.

I think this is like what your butt looks like from the inside. Oh, yeah.

I think you're right, butthead.

I was watching the Learning Channel once, and they had this special where

had like a camera go inside somebody's butt, and he like went all the way from

his butt into his stomach.

It was cool.

Really? Yeah.

You mean somebody let him shove a camera up his butt? Yeah, I'm serious. They

had, like, this guy, like, they stuffed a whole camcorder up his butt. And then,

like, they had, like, a guy with lights, too, like a whole crew.

That's cool.

What's happening to the dude's face?

I think he's, like, changing expressions and stuff.

Really? That's dumb.

Yeah.

It's like you really only need like three expressions or something.

Like one expression for when you're trying to pick up on a chick. Yeah,

When I'm trying to pick up on a chick, I usually look like this.

Yeah.

I usually use this expression.

And then like you need an expression for like when you're lying.

Yeah, yeah. I usually use this one when I'm lying. Check it out.

And then, like, do you like an expression for, like, when you're taking

Yeah.

This one usually works for me.

Yeah, yeah, me.

I usually use this one.

That's a pretty good one, Viva. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I stopped by to get one of these home pregnancy tests.

So I guess if it changes color, I'll be looking just like you in no time.

Hey, Bela, you should get one of those.

Shut up, butthead. I don't need one of those.

What's your problem, dumbass?

I was just telling you to get some food.

Oh, yeah, food.

Food, food, food.

See?

I keep losing my temper for no reason, and I feel like hell.

Really? I find myself craving the strangest food.

Well, lately I've been feeling like a total twat.

You dork.

Hey, but you know how those women got pregnant, right?

Oh, yeah.

They had to, like, do it, right?

Yeah.

They did it.

I knew that.

I was just like, you know, testing you and stuff.

Ow! Girl, I can't believe you went and got yourself pregnant.

You can get yourself pregnant?

Give me one of those!

What's with you, Beavis?

You look like you're pregnant.

Ow!

What the hell are you doing in there, butt munch?

I think that checks that it changes color if you're pregnant.

Let's see, um... I taste a K .M .P .C. La Prebois.

Okay.

Let's see, maybe it goes here.

Ow!

No.

Um, let's see.

You're supposed to pee on it.

Ah.

Better not change the color.

It turned yellow!

Hey, butthead.

I know this guy who, like, wants to know what it's like if you, you know, have

babies.

What a dork.

He's a real dumbass.

But, like, you know, he's, like, you know, really wandering.

It's like you're always wiping up crap and getting puke all over you. Cool.

I guess, yeah.

But then you have to watch all these, like, Barney videos and stuff.

So you don't get to watch any cool TV for, like, years or something.

Whoa!

Having babies sucks!

We already have three kids, honey.

I'm not sure we can afford to have this one.

We'll find a way, darling.

Because the more children we have, the more love.

Life, the beautiful alternative.

Give me another epidural!

You moron!

Don't keep telling me. I only feel pressure.

I feel pain!

Pain, you little turds!

Quick, let me pee you out of me.

Contraptions! Contraptions!

It's coming out! I can feel it!

Life.

What a beautiful choice.

Life, it sucks.

All these kids have one thing in common. They're here because a couple people

did it. Whoa, look at that, it's Geraldo.

Oh, no.

This is Yanni.

Come on, change it, Butt -It.

I can't believe they're even showing this. Yeah.

This guy is the biggest butthole I've ever seen in my life.

Yeah, yeah.

Change it, Butt -It.

Come on, give me that. Damn it.

Wait a minute. I think it's about to rock.

Come on. Damn it, Butt -It. Cut it out. No way, Beavis.

You like this. Shut up, Butt -It.

I don't.

Turn it down.

Hey, Beavis.

Did you know that this guy's your dad?

No!

You're a dumbass, Beavis.

You just, like, believe anything anybody tells you.

Oh, um, no.

I'm just kidding.

Yeah.

Check it out.

She's leaving him because he sucks.

Yeah.

Hey, how's it going?

Okay, now to Willard for the weekend weather.

So tell us, Willard, weather or not?

These guys think they're funny, but they're really just, like, stupid.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like when you think you're pregnant, but you really

have to take a big dump.

Yeah.

Hey, buddy, whose trailer is that?

It kind of looks like my Uncle Mike's. Really? You have all those butterflies

and crap on it? No, you're thinking of my grandma's trailer.

Your grandma's a slut.

I know.

So what?

Yeah, yeah.

Is this Sesame Street?

Oh, yeah, yeah. That looks like a rover.

You probably watched Sesame Street.

No, I used to watch it when I was a kid.

And, like, sometimes when Sesame Street on Ice comes to town, sometimes I go

check that out.

Shoot, Wolfie.

One of these things is not like the other. One of these things just doesn't

belong.

Dumbass.

Another guy that comes out and he says, 12 chocolate cake. And he, like, falls

on his butt.

Like the cake spill all over the place. That was pretty cool. Oh, yeah.

That was kind of cool.

Yeah.

Whoa.

I've never seen a puppet with booters like that.

Yeah, he has a lot of big boobs.

Yeah. They probably have this chick on the show to teach kids the number two.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Can I say, this puppet chick right here is like one of the top three Muppets

that I would like to do. Really?

Who else would you do, Beaver?

Well... That piggy's kind of hot.

That pig?

Shut up, butthead.

I like them with a little meat on their bone.

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