Original subtitles

You know what sucks, Beavis?

Yeah.

You

know what else

sucks?

What? Nothing ever happened.

Yeah. That sucks.

That was cool.

Yeah.

Is that the smoke alarm?

Damn it, Beavis. Did you burn another burrito?

I don't think so.

We need to just take the batteries out of that damn thing. Yeah, but then what

if there's a... This

is

freaking me out. Yeah.

This is weird.

I have a sore throat, but...

Does it sound scratchy when I talk?

Uh, yeah, sort of. Really?

Yeah.

You're always like, yeah.

I don't sound like that.

I'm just going to be quiet for a while because my throat hurts. Okay.

Good.

You sound really stupid most of the time.

Yeah, it's pretty cool because... Shut up, butthead. I don't talk like that.

I'm not going to say anything.

I'm just going to be quiet.

Ow!

Ow!

What's that

guy patting his stomach for?

Maybe he's got, like, a hurt rabbit in his shirt and he's like...

We're done with this video.

I'm going to let you out, and I'm going to give you a carrot. We're going to fix

your leg. Damn it, Viva. Now, see, that's what I'm talking about right

They're going, that baby's got a rabbit in his stomach.

What the hell is this dude saying?

It's like he's saying, fried egg, fried egg, fried egg.

Fried egg. Fried egg.

Fried egg.

Whoa.

Cool. Yeah.

It's just like one of those plane crashes on TV.

Uh, yeah.

Um, I wonder if he's, like, dead or something.

Uh, ask him.

Um, excuse me, sir, are you dead?

What did he say?

Uh, I think he said...

Oh, yeah, yeah.

You know what we have to do, Beavis? Yeah, get a video camera.

Yeah.

Maybe we'll get on America's funniest home videos.

This is gonna be cool.

Hey,

stop!

Uh, we need a ride, because there's, like, the plane that crashed.

You stay here. I'll get help.

That sucks.

Yeah.

We saw him first.

Damn it.

You boys may have saved a life. Your heroes probably end up on TV.

Cool. Yes.

It all began with a mile -high joyride on a fateful June day.

I was doing shots of tequila and licking the salt. I suddenly realized I wasn't

flying the plane.

I said, this is it.

I'm gonna die.

Two young boys were relaxing outside when they heard the roar of Bud's plane.

Uh, look.

It's a plane.

Yeah, but something went wrong.

Bud's plane crashed into a thicket of tree.

It was a total wreck, leaving Bud trapped and barely alive.

There was clearly nothing to do but encourage Bud to hang on.

Steve Furlong was on his way home. Yeah, I saw these two frantic boys and they

were waving to get my attention.

The boys explained what happened.

Furlong went for help.

Within 15 minutes, Bud was airlifted to County Hospital, safe and alive.

Today, he's fully recovered and flying for a commercial airline.

Thanks to these two boys, Beavis and Butthead. So glad to meet you guys.

Hey, Beavis, he's got the Playboy channel. Cool.

And now, the Twisted Madam Olga will teach you a lesson you'll never forget.

Hey, I think there's a tale from the crypt. All right. Sometime they show

Uh, I don't think so, Beaver.

I don't think it's a crypt keeper. Oh, yeah.

Now that, that Crypt Keeper, he's got, like, wrinkled up skin and everything.

Yeah. I always wonder what a nutsack looks like.

You're a prevert, Viva. Well, you know, I'm just like, you know, probably really

scary looking.

Good evening, boys and ghouls.

Shut up, Viva.

I'm gonna kick you in the nutsack.

That's enough, Beavis.

That was pretty good.

Hey, those are like those sunglasses your grandma wears, Beavis. Yeah.

She's like, I'm going out to get some medicine and a carton of smoke.

Beavis, honey, go get your grandma her sunglasses, okay?

Yeah.

And you're like, get them yourself, butt munch. Yeah.

Really.

Get him yourself.

Well, put it. Put it. Look at that up there.

You can see something. Look.

Yeah.

There's a lot of butt wiggling and butt snapping and, like, people sticking

their butts out. Yeah.

Yeah, this is what we need.

Then it's like this guy's going around sticking his butt out going, jam it in

and screw it.

Do the ultra twist.

Boy, this is some nasty stuff.

These guys understand the importance of a good butt.

Sometimes a disaster shows you you're not alone.

People really do care.

Beavis and Butthead restored my faith in humanity.

This sucks.

Yeah. I want to see something with chicks.

Next on Rescue 911, Margo was skinny dipping when she felt something biting

foot. When we got her on shore, I listened for a heartbeat.

But there wasn't any, so I had to use CPR.

One, two, three. Whoa.

Yeah. Five. Whoa.

Yeah.

Whoa. Yeah.

Smashed from the jaws of death.

Haven't we seen this video before?

I think I've seen a video like this before where, like, the music was all

and loud and guys were, like, you know, banging their heads like this. Oh, yeah.

I remember that one.

Those were cool.

This music is, like, nice, peaceful music.

Yeah, isn't it, like, good if you want to just, you know, like, just kind of

mellow out or something?

Yeah.

Whoa, check it out. He's like some kind of scientific dude.

Oh, yeah.

That's cool.

Hey, if I was a scientific, I'd, like, do a experiment, you know? Or I'd, like,

get a chick in, and I'd say, okay, chick, I'm going to have to ask you to

naked, and then I'm going to experiment with your boob.

Yeah.

That was cool.

Hey, look, I think this dude's trying to, like, catch a chick and then, like,

experiments on her.

Oh, yeah.

That's like that movie we saw where that dude had that chick in his basement and

he was going to, like, cut her skin off and stuff.

Yeah, that was a good movie.

Not like some of those movies where it's like, no way.

Yeah.

Like, remember that movie, The Right Stuff?

Oh, yeah, yeah. That was stupid.

That's never going to happen. Yeah, yeah, really.

Dumb.

I like that movie, Alive.

Yeah.

It's like, that was a good idea, but, like, that would never happen.

Yeah, like a plane would really crash like that, you know?

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