Original subtitles

Have you been injured in an accident that was not your fault? Then you need

tough, smart lawyer Joe Adler. Joe Adler can help you... And when I was in the

hospital, they even sent flowers.

Have you been injured?

Have you been injured? Have you been injured? Then call the injury hotline at

-400 -BAD -BACK.

Check this out.

Hello. Uh, yes.

I've been injured. Yeah, I've got a big crack in my butt.

That was cool.

Whoa.

This is disgusting.

Look at his eyebrows.

Yeah, his eyebrows suck.

Whoa.

I'm being hypnotized.

Yeah, me too.

I'm going to vomit.

He's stuck in a crack.

Whoa,

that guitar is cool.

Yeah.

It's shaped like one of those things.

Yeah.

Like that tattoo on your mom's butt.

No, that one's on her shoulder.

She's got a battleship on her butt.

Oh, yeah.

And remember, I'm not only the hair club president, I'm also a member.

You said member.

Cool.

I want you boys to prune both of these trees up front here, and I... Hey,

you boys look familiar.

Aren't you the ones that ran off of my riding mower last week?

Uh, no.

You the ones that painted my cat's butt?

No.

Well, the cops will get them.

Luckily, I've got homeowner's insurance.

You've got what?

Homeowner's insurance.

Now, have you boys done any pruning before?

Yeah.

You know, back when I was your age, I'd work 14 hours a day pruning trees and

still have time to come home and mow the lawn.

I'll be back in a while to see how you're doing.

Remember, it ain't what you cut, it's what you don't cut.

What a dork.

Yeah.

Boy, oh boy.

What I wouldn't give for five minutes alone with those little bastards that

my mower.

Don't go away. Beavis and Butthead will be right back practicing anti -social

behavior and bad manners.

Hey, Butthead. Do you think a man will ever land on your anus?

Maybe on your anus.

What are you all doing? Choking your chicken?

Come on, let's get to pruning.

What are we supposed to do again?

I forgot.

Oh, yeah, I think we're supposed to, like, cut off the branches.

All of them?

Yeah, I guess.

Cool.

Hey, since we've got to cut off all the branches, let's just cut it right down

here.

Yeah.

Then we get them all at once.

You're pretty smart, butthead.

Yeah.

Maybe you'll pay us extra.

Yeah. That would be cool.

cool.

Yeah. This chainsaw kicks ass.

Pruning is cool.

Yeah. Let's go prune some power lines.

Welcome to the jungle, baby. You're gonna die!

We're going to have to charge you extra, sir.

Yeah. We pruned the house, too.

Oh, cool.

How do those guys pee with their pants on backwards?

He brought it. Which one's Cross?

Cross is the Mac. Daddy. And Chris is the Daddy Mac.

What do you think would win in a fight

between Daddy Mac and the Mac Daddy?

I don't know.

But they could both kick Axel's ass.

Yeah, that would be cool if Axel got his ass kicked by a couple of 12 -year

-olds.

What were we born to do?

Uh... This court is now in session.

I know you've been sworn, sir, and I have read your complaint.

My turn to be the judge, asswipe.

Oh, yeah.

Okay.

This court is now in session.

How do you please to these charges of, uh... Trespassing.

Oh, yeah.

Trespassing. And buzzing around and getting in my face and stuff.

How do you please to these charges against you?

The defense rests.

Shut up!

Okay.

I hereby sentence the defendant to death by... Death

by... Saw off his tweeter.

Breaking the law. Breaking the law.

Breaking the law. Breaking the law.

Humpty kicks ass.

Humpty rules.

I look funny.

But, yo, I'm making money, see. So, yo, world, I hope you're ready for me. Now

gather round.

I'm the new fool in town, and my band's laid down by the underground.

I'll drink a bottle of Hennessy you got in your shell. So just let me introduce

myself. My name is Humpty, pronounced with a Humpty.

The name is Humpty, pronounced with a Humpty. And all the rappers in the top

ten, please allow me to bump thee.

Rappers in the top ten, please allow me to bump thee.

I like to rhyme. I like to be funky.

Hey, Beavis, I heard this guy really doesn't have a nose. He got in some

accident.

No, wait, butthead. That's just a plastic nose.

I know. That's because he had plastic surgery.

Bathroom, I'm crazy. Whoa.

I do

the Humpty

Hump. I do the Humpty Hump.

The Humpty Dance is your chance to do the hump.

Come on.

Do the hoppy hop.

Do the hoppy hop.