Original subtitles

Hey, Butthead, this bus ride is giving me wood.

Yeah. Yeah.

That's like the only reason to even go to school.

Yeah. Wood, good.

All bad.

Hey, Beavis, let's like not go.

Yeah, yeah, cool.

Uh, hey, we're like getting off.

Yeah, we need to get off.

Man, we ain't in school yet.

Uh, it's like an emergency.

An emergency? Well, now that's different. Here you go.

Hey, Beavis, we're like not in school.

Yeah, cool.

Ever since I was a young boy, I played the silver ball.

There are no angels left in America anymore.

This is what happens when, like, old people try to rap.

Hey, didn't this guy, like, already do this song before?

Uh, oh, yeah.

But he has long hair now.

You mean, like, every time you grow your hair long, you have to, like, go do all

your songs over again?

Uh, no,

that's not what I said.

And you may ask yourself.

And you may think yourself.

And you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile.

And you may find yourself in a beautiful house with a beautiful wife. And you

may ask her, where's the bathroom at?

I can barely touch my own self.

He can't touch himself.

That's not really very funny.

That's like, um... That couldn't happen to me, could it?

Uh... Hey, hey, hey, wait.

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

That wasn't a chick, was it?

I think it was, but it... I think it... I got a boob.

Hey, change it, but it doesn't make me dizzy.

Come on, Beaver. It'll give you a good buzz.

Yeah, but it's like...

Getting sick to my stomach. Come on.

Is this Led Zeppelin?

I think this is like one of those things where like they say it's Led Zeppelin,

but it only has like one of the original dudes in it.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, it's like, they always do that. You can always tell who the original

is because he's fat.

He's got, like, white hair.

Whoa, that dude has hips like a woman.

That sucks when guys, like, just put out the same

stuff over and over again.

I said put out.

But really, that sucks when guys just repeat themselves and do the same stuff

over and over.

He said eat themselves.

Eat themselves.

Oh, yeah.

I think this is where they show how they made the video.

I thought this was a video.

Uh, no, Beavis.

This is, like, the making of the video.

Really?

Then you just, like, show the video, because, like, this thing sucks.

Okay,

thank you for calling Muller Real Estate.

Bye. Uh, is this, like, a mall or something?

Uh, yes, this is Muller Real Estate.

Are you boys the temp? Of course. Of course you are. What am I saying?

Uh, I don't know.

Beavis?

Yeah, um, no.

You two must be the starving artist type.

Um, yeah.

Where's the food court at?

Anyway, Beavis is it?

Let's make you the typist here, and your friend can do reception.

Sit down, make yourselves at home.

Hey, butthead.

Copy machine.

Do that thing.

Check it out.

Would you like a copy of my butt?

I'm enlarging my butt.

Mr.

Muller put you up to this, didn't he? Oh, my.

The stories I could tell you.

Okay, Beavis, why don't we get you started on some letters?

And you, sir, let's park you in front of the phones.

Hi, we're here from the temp agency.

I, um, may I help you?

Yes, we're here from the temp agency.

Um, please have a seat.

Your order will be ready in a minute.

Would you like a copy of my butt?

Uh,

hello?

Uh, never heard of him, dude.

Yeah? This is Butthead. Who the hell is this?

Hello? Hey, baby.

Uh, he's, like, out having his butt cleaned.

Uh,

Beavis, right?

Great to have you on board today.

Stan. You probably recognize the name from all the letters you've been typing

for me. Not really, Sam.

Stan. I'm Stan.

Okay, listen. Hey, great job on all these letters.

But I guess what I need now is for you to just make some real minor corrections

here. Okay, so I've pretty much just made the corrections in red here, and

not a super rush. As soon as you get a chance, that would be great.

Okay,

Sam.

I'm like... Real Billy and stuff.

Cool, man. Like I say, Beavis, no rush on this. Whenever.

Butt -town?

Yeah, yeah, everybody loves butt -town.

Butt -town.

This is cool.

Butt -town.

Yeah.

If you live in butt -town, you've got to get down.

Butt -town, yeah.

Butt -town's rule.

I don't know, but I'm going to find a map and go there.

Can I come too?

Uh, no, Beaver.

Dumbass.

This song has the best lyrics I've ever heard.

Yeah, yeah.

How did this guy come up with this stuff?

Fuck town.

If you live in fuck town, you gotta get down.

Yeah.

This dude should hook up with Thurmex a lot.

They could, like, sit around and talk about butts and stuff.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I'd like to see that.

I told you last time you called, I never heard of that guy.

Get off the phone before I kick your ass.

Whoa, this thing's pretty hot.

You broke it, dumbass.

And I was right in the middle of a conversation or something.

You broke it, bunghole.

You talk too much.

Uh, ma 'am?

This butt munch broke your office?

No way. He did it. He did it.

Well, listen, boys, it's nothing to get bent out of shape about.

We'll have someone come in tomorrow and take a look at it.

Now, why don't you two punch out and we'll see you tomorrow?

Uh, okay.

Yeah, okay.

You see that arrow?

You know that, like, that symbolizes the wiener?

What wiener? Where?

It stands for wieners everywhere.

But people are still having sex and

nothing seems to stop them.

Uh, people are still having sex?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What people? Where?

What name?

Settle down, Beavis.

Well, people are still having sex, and I was like, I'm not having sex. Well, you

could keep your mouth shut and maybe he'd tell you.

Oh, okay.

Yeah,

yeah, I understand, but where, where, where?

Damn it, come on, where?

Who, who, where, where? Just listen this time, shut up.

Okay. Damn it, there he goes again. Come on, where?

Ooh, ooh, where, where?

Leela, shut up.

Whoa, that thing's getting it on with a donut.

Yeah.

Um, hey, a donut sounds pretty good. I think I'm going to go get a donut.

You got any?

Yeah.

Bring me back a couple.