Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:11,260 --> 00:00:12,750
Congratulations!
2
00:00:12,750 --> 00:00:14,940
- On what? - Well, all the doors are now shut,
3
00:00:14,940 --> 00:00:16,530
and I just sealed the last window.
4
00:00:16,530 --> 00:00:17,560
So you know what that means?
5
00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:19,060
We should get a carbon monoxide alarm?
6
00:00:19,060 --> 00:00:23,690
No! Well, yes. But it also means that pigeon can't get in here.
7
00:00:23,780 --> 00:00:26,290
Which I'd say calls for a toast.
8
00:00:26,290 --> 00:00:28,110
I thought we were saving that to celebrate the woodworm treatment.
9
00:00:28,110 --> 00:00:30,500
Nah, it's only prosecco. I'll buy another bottle.
10
00:00:34,690 --> 00:00:36,750
See, this is why we wait for the woodworm treatment.
11
00:00:36,750 --> 00:00:39,050
Quick! Block the hole before the pigeon gets...
12
00:00:42,670 --> 00:00:43,360
How?!
13
00:01:10,240 --> 00:01:13,020
- Mike, it won't shut with that on. - Yeah, I'm not an idiot.
14
00:01:13,030 --> 00:01:15,000
They're just holding it while I put the Sellotape on.
15
00:01:17,650 --> 00:01:18,750
Bitches!
16
00:01:19,050 --> 00:01:21,480
Bitches! Bitches!
17
00:01:21,810 --> 00:01:22,870
Bitches!
18
00:01:23,470 --> 00:01:24,920
They don't listen.
19
00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:26,040
Women, eh?
20
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:27,820
Barclay!
21
00:01:28,590 --> 00:01:29,550
Beg-Chetwynde.
22
00:01:29,550 --> 00:01:30,730
Wh...What's that?
23
00:01:30,760 --> 00:01:33,100
That's me. Barclay Beg-Chetwynde.
24
00:01:33,100 --> 00:01:34,250
From next door.
25
00:01:34,430 --> 00:01:35,530
We have a next door?
26
00:01:35,530 --> 00:01:37,400
Yes, about a mile that way.
27
00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:40,370
- I own the... You know the village? - Yeah.
28
00:01:40,370 --> 00:01:41,770
Yes, I own that.
29
00:01:41,770 --> 00:01:43,250
We summer in Tuscany,
30
00:01:43,260 --> 00:01:45,340
but got back and saw you'd moved in.
31
00:01:45,340 --> 00:01:47,650
Thought I should come say how do?
32
00:01:47,650 --> 00:01:51,610
Right. Yeah. I'm...I'm Alison, and this is Mike. Sorry - come in.
33
00:01:51,610 --> 00:01:52,280
Thank you.
34
00:01:57,090 --> 00:01:57,780
What you say?
35
00:01:57,780 --> 00:02:00,140
Tally! Tally!
36
00:02:00,140 --> 00:02:01,830
Must have seen a ghost.
37
00:02:03,320 --> 00:02:07,150
Didn't you know? This place - absolutely riddled with them.
38
00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:08,760
So legend has it.
39
00:02:08,760 --> 00:02:12,010
There's a lady falls from a window in the west wing.
40
00:02:12,010 --> 00:02:12,950
East wing!
41
00:02:12,950 --> 00:02:14,450
- Dressed in white. - Grey!
42
00:02:14,450 --> 00:02:15,870
- Georgian. - Edwardian.
43
00:02:15,870 --> 00:02:18,280
Attractive. Early 20s.
44
00:02:20,170 --> 00:02:23,470
And a strange creature that roams the grounds -
45
00:02:23,470 --> 00:02:25,840
half man, half ape.
46
00:02:29,790 --> 00:02:32,890
- Well, I haven't seen anything. - No. No, he hasn't.
47
00:02:32,890 --> 00:02:34,600
It's probably all tosh and piffle.
48
00:02:34,600 --> 00:02:38,420
Anyway, reason I called, incepto ne desistam...
49
00:02:38,420 --> 00:02:40,890
Oh, I remember this berk!
50
00:02:40,890 --> 00:02:43,580
Met him at a party fundraiser here back in the day.
51
00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:46,320
Rich as Croesus. Loves the sound of his own voice.
52
00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:50,640
Which reminds me of a very funny story I heard once on a golf course.
53
00:02:50,640 --> 00:02:52,500
Now, there was Brucie. That's Brucie Forsyth...
54
00:02:52,500 --> 00:02:54,330
Guys! Guys, anecdote!
55
00:02:56,240 --> 00:03:01,280
Now, it doesn't really affect your grounds inside the gates,
56
00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:05,610
but the path outside the gates is on my deed,
57
00:03:05,610 --> 00:03:09,930
so, technically, you have to cross a strip of my land
58
00:03:09,930 --> 00:03:12,200
every time you enter your house.
59
00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:14,480
We had no idea.
60
00:03:14,490 --> 00:03:16,520
It's a simple thing to sort out,
61
00:03:16,520 --> 00:03:20,250
but probably worth a quick powwow at some point.
62
00:03:20,250 --> 00:03:21,910
Yeah, sure. Well, we'll...
63
00:03:21,920 --> 00:03:23,830
Maybe you could come to dinner some time?
64
00:03:23,830 --> 00:03:25,950
Splendid idea! See you at eight.
65
00:03:25,950 --> 00:03:26,900
I'm free!
66
00:03:28,900 --> 00:03:31,010
I'll bring a Pelaverga!
67
00:03:31,860 --> 00:03:35,410
- What's a...? - Oh, and Bunny can't eat beef.
68
00:03:35,420 --> 00:03:39,110
Well, she can, but she shouldn't, if you know what I mean.
69
00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:44,000
Right, once more unto the breach! Come along, bitches!
70
00:03:45,820 --> 00:03:46,890
Is that all of them?
71
00:03:47,570 --> 00:03:49,780
Never mind. What did you do that for?
72
00:03:49,780 --> 00:03:52,360
Because he's got some weird claim over our driveway,
73
00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:53,920
so we should probably keep him sweet.
74
00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:55,860
Besides, he's our way in.
75
00:03:55,860 --> 00:03:56,990
To what?
76
00:03:56,990 --> 00:03:59,500
Society, Mike. We're posh now.
77
00:03:59,500 --> 00:04:00,920
We should be mixing with other poshos.
78
00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:02,890
- But he is awful! - So?
79
00:04:02,890 --> 00:04:04,950
Some awful people have really nice friends.
80
00:04:05,430 --> 00:04:07,200
I mean, look at your mate Greg.
81
00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:08,280
What's wrong with Greg?
82
00:04:08,280 --> 00:04:08,970
Nothing.
83
00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:13,940
Hello, girl! You're lovely, in't you?
84
00:04:14,870 --> 00:04:15,650
It's worth it.
85
00:04:17,070 --> 00:04:18,200
Hello, girl!
86
00:04:22,660 --> 00:04:24,200
I can't touch any more.
87
00:04:48,780 --> 00:04:49,880
Book? Film?
88
00:04:50,890 --> 00:04:53,480
Five words. The Importance Of Being Earnest.
89
00:04:53,490 --> 00:04:54,510
Great Expectations.
90
00:04:54,510 --> 00:04:55,740
Tootsie! Tootsie!
91
00:04:55,740 --> 00:04:57,440
Tootsie! Tootsie! Tootsie!
92
00:04:57,440 --> 00:04:59,850
It's Tootsie. Tootsie! It's Tootsie!
93
00:04:59,850 --> 00:05:01,350
Tootsie! Tootsie!
94
00:05:01,350 --> 00:05:02,480
Stop saying Tootsie!
95
00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:04,330
What be a tootsie?
96
00:05:04,980 --> 00:05:05,690
Round...
97
00:05:06,820 --> 00:05:08,690
- covering... - Oh, it's an eclipse!
98
00:05:09,450 --> 00:05:10,810
Eclipse.
99
00:05:10,980 --> 00:05:13,160
- Moonah eclipse! - God, not this again.
100
00:05:13,160 --> 00:05:16,010
- Must we humour this bull calf? - It's absolutely asinine.
101
00:05:16,010 --> 00:05:19,750
It is a wonderful group activity, and he doesn't ask for much.
102
00:05:19,750 --> 00:05:21,670
Well, he can't ask for much.
103
00:05:22,180 --> 00:05:23,590
Me speak good!
104
00:05:23,590 --> 00:05:26,370
Well! Me speak well! I!
105
00:05:26,370 --> 00:05:28,890
I'm not actually free tonight, but I could do Thursday.
106
00:05:28,890 --> 00:05:30,890
No. Eclipse is tonight!
107
00:05:30,890 --> 00:05:32,060
All right, all right, all right!
108
00:05:32,060 --> 00:05:34,270
We'll do it, provided I can do the reading.
109
00:05:34,530 --> 00:05:35,940
Not a chance, sir!
110
00:05:35,940 --> 00:05:37,510
Me always do the reading!
111
00:05:37,510 --> 00:05:39,350
- I... - Very well.
112
00:05:39,350 --> 00:05:40,680
We'll put it to the vote.
113
00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:44,530
Who would you like to hear speak more - me or Thomas?
114
00:05:47,300 --> 00:05:49,820
Be there a third option?
115
00:05:53,210 --> 00:05:55,000
Yeah, that is pretty much what I thought.
116
00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:57,090
Torn thing of peas and a frozen lasagne.
117
00:05:57,970 --> 00:05:58,920
Make your lasagne!
118
00:05:58,920 --> 00:06:00,960
Mike, my lasagne is frozen lasagne.
119
00:06:00,960 --> 00:06:03,250
I'm not serving them that. I don't want them thinking
120
00:06:03,250 --> 00:06:04,610
that we're the sort of that people that we are.
121
00:06:04,610 --> 00:06:06,130
Well, what do posh people eat?
122
00:06:06,140 --> 00:06:08,070
- Turtle soup. - No.
123
00:06:08,070 --> 00:06:09,790
- What? - Turtle soup.
124
00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:10,920
Oh, yeah. No.
125
00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:13,680
- Oyster rissoles? - Oyster rissoles?
126
00:06:13,680 --> 00:06:16,550
You don't like shellfish, and I'm not eating anything's rissole.
127
00:06:16,550 --> 00:06:18,170
I don't think it means what you think it means.
128
00:06:18,170 --> 00:06:19,670
What about pheasant?
129
00:06:21,410 --> 00:06:22,090
What?
130
00:06:23,090 --> 00:06:25,190
Up a bit. Left a bit.
131
00:06:25,190 --> 00:06:26,280
Can't we just go to the shops?
132
00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:27,710
No, we haven't got time. Just concentrate.
133
00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:30,050
Down a bit. A bit more.
134
00:06:30,570 --> 00:06:31,390
Bit more.
135
00:06:32,130 --> 00:06:32,780
Bit more...
136
00:06:32,780 --> 00:06:35,450
- Do you want to do it? - You lost the toss.
137
00:06:35,970 --> 00:06:37,880
- Little bit more. - Bit more.
138
00:06:38,950 --> 00:06:39,450
I don't think I can do...
139
00:06:39,450 --> 00:06:40,330
- Fire, fire, fire! - Go!
140
00:06:42,850 --> 00:06:44,890
Gleaming bundook op from the civvy!
141
00:06:44,890 --> 00:06:47,140
We'll have him out boshing Jerry in no time!
142
00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:49,580
- What did he say? - No idea.
143
00:06:49,580 --> 00:06:51,600
And then something racist.
144
00:06:51,600 --> 00:06:53,970
There's a hare. There's a hare! There's a hare!
145
00:06:53,970 --> 00:06:55,450
- He says, there's a hare. - There's a hare.
146
00:06:56,930 --> 00:07:00,010
This is grim. Why did I have to pluck it?
147
00:07:04,460 --> 00:07:06,600
In the oven for 20 minutes.
148
00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:09,390
No, you have to de-gloves the gizzards.
149
00:07:09,390 --> 00:07:12,050
Well, it doesn't say that here and, no offence, Mary,
150
00:07:12,050 --> 00:07:14,980
but I trust the book more than you... Oh, my God.
151
00:07:14,980 --> 00:07:16,120
Gizzards.
152
00:07:20,090 --> 00:07:22,900
Right, you're in charge of the pheasant.
153
00:07:22,900 --> 00:07:25,170
Call me when it looks done.
154
00:07:25,180 --> 00:07:28,670
- Done. - OK, I'm going to change into...
155
00:07:29,160 --> 00:07:30,300
What do posh people wear?
156
00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:32,410
- Crowns? - I'm asking the wrong person.
157
00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:33,960
Oh, yes, yeah.
158
00:07:35,300 --> 00:07:36,520
That smells gamey.
159
00:07:41,690 --> 00:07:43,070
Left a bit...
160
00:07:43,590 --> 00:07:44,850
No, right a bit.
161
00:07:45,810 --> 00:07:47,080
No, left a bit...
162
00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:48,350
It's fine!
163
00:07:48,350 --> 00:07:49,690
It's amazing, isn't it,
164
00:07:49,710 --> 00:07:52,970
to think, a sacred site right here for all those years?
165
00:07:52,970 --> 00:07:53,940
Your own little Stonehenge.
166
00:07:53,940 --> 00:07:56,560
No! Stonehenge copied!
167
00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:58,200
- OK. All right, all right. - Well!
168
00:07:58,200 --> 00:08:01,300
Settle down. Now, the eclipse itself will be at...
169
00:08:03,390 --> 00:08:05,690
Robin! Robin!
170
00:08:05,700 --> 00:08:06,950
Yes, thank you, Robin!
171
00:08:07,780 --> 00:08:09,000
We got it the first time.
172
00:08:09,470 --> 00:08:11,320
It'll be at 2100.
173
00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:12,650
Nine o'clock.
174
00:08:12,680 --> 00:08:14,890
Now, I trust everyone remembers the drill?
175
00:08:14,890 --> 00:08:16,450
I, of course, will be doing the reading...
176
00:08:16,450 --> 00:08:18,440
Farcical. It should be I... Me!
177
00:08:18,440 --> 00:08:22,160
..Based on Robin's recollection of the original ritual.
178
00:08:22,300 --> 00:08:26,880
Thank be to moonah! Good light in sky...
179
00:08:26,890 --> 00:08:28,830
Loosely based. Any questions?
180
00:08:29,010 --> 00:08:29,860
Excellent.
181
00:08:29,860 --> 00:08:34,330
And, as always, our muster point will be right...here.
182
00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:36,280
Moonah stone!
183
00:08:42,530 --> 00:08:48,420
No, you heathen! Spoon on the outside, spoon on the outside!
184
00:08:48,420 --> 00:08:49,950
Oh, I can't look.
185
00:08:51,250 --> 00:08:53,420
Is that what you're wearing? Me?!
186
00:08:53,610 --> 00:08:54,900
You look like Downton Abbey.
187
00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:56,130
Abbey's not a character, Mike.
188
00:08:56,130 --> 00:08:57,070
And, for your information,
189
00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:59,850
this is entirely appropriate evening attire
190
00:08:59,850 --> 00:09:02,830
for entertaining guests of such refined social standing.
191
00:09:02,830 --> 00:09:05,670
The Beg-Chetwyndes are de-facto gatekeepers
192
00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:07,480
for the county's social calendar,
193
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:09,240
and are possessing of a very fine...
194
00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:10,560
I know what you're doing.
195
00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:12,500
Fine.
196
00:09:12,980 --> 00:09:15,000
But I am reliably informed that this is how posh people dress,
197
00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:16,740
so I'm sorry, but I'm not changing anything.
198
00:09:16,740 --> 00:09:18,610
I'll put on a shirt if you lose the pearls.
199
00:09:18,610 --> 00:09:19,640
Yep, OK.
200
00:09:22,290 --> 00:09:22,980
Hurry up!
201
00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:25,930
They're here, they're here! How do I look?
202
00:09:25,940 --> 00:09:27,210
The same, Kitty.
203
00:09:27,220 --> 00:09:29,340
And remember, don't... Just don't.
204
00:09:29,340 --> 00:09:30,680
This is important to us.
205
00:09:32,990 --> 00:09:34,080
Annabel!
206
00:09:34,080 --> 00:09:36,510
- Alison. - This is Bunny. Bunny, this is Annabel.
207
00:09:36,510 --> 00:09:39,070
- Alison. - Sorry we're early, I drove here.
208
00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:40,940
Oh, yeah.
209
00:09:40,940 --> 00:09:42,730
Michael, Bunny!
210
00:09:42,730 --> 00:09:44,300
Bunny, Michael.
211
00:09:44,690 --> 00:09:47,180
Smashing shirt. Who is it?
212
00:09:47,220 --> 00:09:47,910
It's me?
213
00:09:48,580 --> 00:09:51,410
And I'm Kitty! I'm wearing what I died in.
214
00:09:51,410 --> 00:09:52,810
Splendid to welcome you.
215
00:09:52,810 --> 00:09:54,820
Please do come in on...on in through.
216
00:09:54,820 --> 00:09:57,750
- Super! - Bunny's been so looking forward to meeting you.
217
00:09:57,750 --> 00:09:58,470
Have I?
218
00:10:00,870 --> 00:10:04,020
Et voila! Pelaverga!
219
00:10:04,940 --> 00:10:06,470
Let me see! Let me see it!
220
00:10:06,470 --> 00:10:08,590
- Let me see! - Thank you. That is most kind.
221
00:10:12,700 --> 00:10:15,050
I am so sorry.
222
00:10:15,180 --> 00:10:16,980
My wife recently had a head injury,
223
00:10:16,980 --> 00:10:19,890
which has caused some of her behaviour to be a little...
224
00:10:22,150 --> 00:10:24,310
Mike, why don't you pop down to the cellar
225
00:10:24,310 --> 00:10:26,150
and try and find us another bottle of wine?
226
00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:28,890
- Er, yeah... - And I can show our guests through.
227
00:10:29,290 --> 00:10:30,430
Do come in on.
228
00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:32,970
The building work is still under way,
229
00:10:32,970 --> 00:10:34,880
- so you may have to adjust your... - Bra strap!
230
00:10:34,880 --> 00:10:36,580
..Bra strap. Expectations!
231
00:10:44,040 --> 00:10:47,000
So, indeed, they advised myself
232
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:50,320
to just sell the house without even seeing it, but I said...
233
00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:52,260
Don't speak with your mouth full!
234
00:11:07,210 --> 00:11:08,300
...but I said that...
235
00:11:09,830 --> 00:11:10,780
Sorry, it's gone.
236
00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:15,290
So, yeah, the idea is to turn it into a hotel.
237
00:11:15,290 --> 00:11:16,970
An 'otel, eh?
238
00:11:16,980 --> 00:11:18,340
Could be a nice little earner.
239
00:11:18,340 --> 00:11:20,780
- Well, it will not be easy, but... - Elbows!
240
00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:23,030
..I think we're on top of things.
241
00:11:24,060 --> 00:11:25,740
*Me, me, me!*
242
00:11:25,740 --> 00:11:27,630
What's louder, me or that?
243
00:11:27,630 --> 00:11:30,310
*Me, me, me!*
244
00:11:30,310 --> 00:11:34,230
Sorry, I just need to go and have a word with my...myself.
245
00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:36,300
*Me...*
246
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:42,170
Who's had that?
247
00:11:43,650 --> 00:11:45,400
Mary! Didn't you smell burning?
248
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:48,410
I always smells burning.
249
00:11:57,250 --> 00:11:58,240
Would you eat that?
250
00:11:58,700 --> 00:12:03,620
Well, I hasn't eaten in 400 years, but no.
251
00:12:04,610 --> 00:12:06,470
Maybe I can salvage it?
252
00:12:06,680 --> 00:12:07,640
That's burnt.
253
00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:09,870
- And I'd know. - Right.
254
00:12:11,140 --> 00:12:12,600
Where's the, um...?
255
00:12:13,550 --> 00:12:15,210
Voila! Pheasant stew.
256
00:12:15,510 --> 00:12:17,830
Right, you watch this. I've got to get back up there
257
00:12:17,830 --> 00:12:20,660
- and convince them I haven't lost my marbles. - What are marbles?
258
00:12:20,660 --> 00:12:23,550
- Just call me when it's reduced. - Right.
259
00:12:25,230 --> 00:12:26,750
Reduced to what?
260
00:12:31,420 --> 00:12:32,950
Sorry about that.
261
00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:35,270
Er, cremated the pheasant.
262
00:12:35,910 --> 00:12:36,790
But all sorted now!
263
00:12:36,790 --> 00:12:40,440
So, um, let's just pretend that this evening so far never happened,
264
00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:41,750
and start right...
265
00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:46,820
Moonah-stona! Moonah-stona!
266
00:12:46,820 --> 00:12:49,300
Moonah-stona! Moonah-stona!
267
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:52,650
So, Alison...
268
00:12:52,650 --> 00:12:53,660
- Annabel. - Annabel.
269
00:12:53,660 --> 00:12:55,650
Moonah-stona! Moonah-stona!
270
00:12:55,650 --> 00:12:59,440
And now thanks be to the wondrous moon
271
00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:03,440
and the guiding light it giveth between 2100 hours...
272
00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:05,020
Dramatic pause.
273
00:13:05,140 --> 00:13:08,570
Take a breath! Give it some light and shade!
274
00:13:08,790 --> 00:13:13,180
*Oh, blessed moon as spied from the Earth*
275
00:13:13,180 --> 00:13:15,490
*Bright as thine eyes*
276
00:13:15,490 --> 00:13:17,480
*Round as thine eyes*
277
00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:20,050
Yet too far apart, like thine...
278
00:13:20,050 --> 00:13:22,020
No, I don't mean your eyes, I mean...
279
00:13:22,030 --> 00:13:23,540
Thorne! I'm doing the reading.
280
00:13:23,540 --> 00:13:25,230
- I won the vote! - To be fair,
281
00:13:25,230 --> 00:13:27,500
it was very close and entirely non-binding.
282
00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:29,080
..Wouldn't you say?
283
00:13:33,100 --> 00:13:35,680
- Moonah-stona! Moonah-stona! - Yes, I wouldn't.
284
00:13:37,510 --> 00:13:38,630
Or would I?
285
00:13:48,430 --> 00:13:50,040
I...I was saying to Mike...
286
00:13:50,040 --> 00:13:51,640
..Just this morning...
287
00:13:51,640 --> 00:13:55,750
..It's been unseasonably warm for the time of year! Bread?
288
00:13:55,890 --> 00:13:56,820
No, thank you.
289
00:13:56,820 --> 00:14:00,600
A lady does not raise her voice in polite company.
290
00:14:08,040 --> 00:14:09,160
Stew update!
291
00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:11,440
All the water's turned to clouds.
292
00:14:16,030 --> 00:14:17,130
Is it a bad time?
293
00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:18,840
Mike!
294
00:14:18,850 --> 00:14:21,920
Bit of a problem with the old... electrics again.
295
00:14:21,920 --> 00:14:25,200
Maybe you should show our guests the fuse box.
296
00:14:25,210 --> 00:14:26,850
Um, yeah.
297
00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:28,240
The fuse box!
298
00:14:28,250 --> 00:14:31,200
Right, fuse box. Yeah. This way, then, guys.
299
00:14:31,330 --> 00:14:32,440
Oh, yeah.
300
00:14:39,800 --> 00:14:40,850
Right!
301
00:14:42,570 --> 00:14:43,560
I'll come back.
302
00:14:43,570 --> 00:14:44,840
Now, you listen to me!
303
00:14:44,850 --> 00:14:46,440
I don't know what's going on here, but...
304
00:14:46,450 --> 00:14:47,410
Kitty!
305
00:14:49,090 --> 00:14:52,240
But it stops right now, because I'm having a dinner party,
306
00:14:52,250 --> 00:14:54,360
which should be clear from the fact that I'm having a dinner party!
307
00:14:54,370 --> 00:14:56,880
But this moonah eclipse very special.
308
00:14:56,890 --> 00:14:58,240
I don't care what it is!
309
00:14:58,250 --> 00:14:59,920
It stops right now.
310
00:14:59,920 --> 00:15:01,680
Now, hang on a moment.
311
00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:05,400
This is a time-honoured ritual that means a great deal to Robin
312
00:15:05,400 --> 00:15:07,680
and, frankly, I think he deserves a little respect.
313
00:15:07,680 --> 00:15:10,320
- Yes. Moonah is... - Shut up, Robin!
314
00:15:10,330 --> 00:15:12,160
The point is, we were here first,
315
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:14,320
so maybe you lot should take your leave.
316
00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:16,170
No.
317
00:15:16,210 --> 00:15:18,890
This is my house now and I'm not going anywhere.
318
00:15:19,010 --> 00:15:21,130
Well, neither are we.
319
00:15:21,890 --> 00:15:22,890
Quite right!
320
00:15:23,770 --> 00:15:24,770
Sorry.
321
00:15:26,650 --> 00:15:27,610
Wait there.
322
00:15:28,920 --> 00:15:31,520
Right. Stand firm, everybody.
323
00:15:31,520 --> 00:15:33,160
I don't know what she has in her arsenal,
324
00:15:33,160 --> 00:15:35,970
but we shall remain resolute against the tyranny that is...
325
00:15:40,890 --> 00:15:42,920
What in the name of St Cuthbert?
326
00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:45,490
It's all the colours at once!
327
00:15:45,570 --> 00:15:47,120
But what does it do?
328
00:15:47,130 --> 00:15:48,890
I'm so glad you asked.
329
00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:50,890
Come this way.
330
00:15:51,680 --> 00:15:54,080
But, no, wait...
331
00:15:54,090 --> 00:15:56,050
It's a compact disc. Guys!
332
00:15:57,010 --> 00:15:58,650
But it's moonah!
333
00:16:04,970 --> 00:16:07,200
And last but not least, we have this one,
334
00:16:07,210 --> 00:16:10,870
- which is "west wing socks." - Sockets.
335
00:16:11,730 --> 00:16:13,170
Yeah. That makes more sense.
336
00:16:13,970 --> 00:16:17,920
And I think that is all the fuses I can show you.
337
00:16:18,090 --> 00:16:19,680
- Fascinating. - Yeah.
338
00:16:19,680 --> 00:16:23,000
To be honest, there's not really anything that fabulous down here.
339
00:16:23,010 --> 00:16:24,560
Speak for yourself.
340
00:16:25,970 --> 00:16:27,090
Plonk!
341
00:16:27,730 --> 00:16:30,000
- Clearly a connoisseur. - I'll grab another bottle.
342
00:16:30,010 --> 00:16:32,480
Actually, while we've got a moment,
343
00:16:32,490 --> 00:16:35,920
perhaps we could just discuss the whole access issue?
344
00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:37,240
- I don't... - Splendid!
345
00:16:37,250 --> 00:16:41,160
Now, the former owner and I just had a gentleman's agreement,
346
00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:43,760
but if you're going to run this place as a business,
347
00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:47,400
you probably want something a bit more official in place,
348
00:16:47,400 --> 00:16:49,320
financially speaking.
349
00:16:49,570 --> 00:16:54,250
So, what if I were to sign over access rights to you for...
350
00:16:54,690 --> 00:16:55,840
Oh, what shall we say?
351
00:16:55,850 --> 00:16:58,130
Oh, I don't know. 20?
352
00:16:58,400 --> 00:16:59,560
20?
353
00:16:59,890 --> 00:17:01,240
Oh, 20's fine!
354
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:03,320
Wonderful.
355
00:17:03,330 --> 00:17:05,040
And since we're all friends now,
356
00:17:05,050 --> 00:17:08,690
let's call it 19,500.
357
00:17:09,570 --> 00:17:11,000
Sorry!
358
00:17:11,010 --> 00:17:13,080
Less 30 quid for that.
359
00:17:17,610 --> 00:17:19,050
Look at the quality!
360
00:17:19,370 --> 00:17:21,120
Knocks the socks off of Betamax.
361
00:17:21,130 --> 00:17:23,080
It's called Friends. It's a comedy.
362
00:17:23,090 --> 00:17:24,240
Like Vanity Fair.
363
00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:26,800
No, that's a magazine. And this is a box set. So,
364
00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:28,240
plenty more where that came from.
365
00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:30,490
Have fun, don't leave the room and...
366
00:17:30,890 --> 00:17:32,050
Don't leave the room.
367
00:17:34,850 --> 00:17:38,360
It just appears to be five people sitting around on a sofa.
368
00:17:38,720 --> 00:17:41,640
What's so amusing about...? Hello!
369
00:17:41,650 --> 00:17:43,490
Who is this?
370
00:17:45,810 --> 00:17:47,720
- Ah, Annabel! - Sorry, sorry, won't be a moment.
371
00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:49,010
No hurry.
372
00:17:49,440 --> 00:17:51,980
- OK. Slight problem. - Oh? And it was going so well.
373
00:17:51,990 --> 00:17:54,120
Yeah. So you know the whole access thing?
374
00:17:54,130 --> 00:17:56,120
Barclay said that we could have the rights for 20 grand.
375
00:17:56,820 --> 00:17:58,640
Yeah! Dream on, mate.
376
00:17:58,650 --> 00:18:01,920
Yeah. I know, right? The thing is, I think I shook on it.
377
00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:03,520
- Huh, what? - Well, he held his hand out.
378
00:18:03,530 --> 00:18:05,600
What was I supposed to do? Not shake it?
379
00:18:06,010 --> 00:18:07,920
- Yes! - I can't do that. It's too awkward.
380
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:09,840
If someone puts their hand out, I always shake it.
381
00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:11,970
Can this evening get any worse?
382
00:18:12,250 --> 00:18:14,270
Right. Stew news!
383
00:18:14,270 --> 00:18:17,360
I believes it has reduced.
384
00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:21,600
That is beyond reduced.
385
00:18:21,610 --> 00:18:25,250
Yeah, I've got to be honest, I don't know what "reduced" means.
386
00:18:29,050 --> 00:18:30,080
Yeah.
387
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:33,160
Well, that was wonderful.
388
00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:36,000
- Yes! - However do you get it so square?
389
00:18:36,010 --> 00:18:38,560
Secret, I'm afraid. Old family recipe.
390
00:18:38,570 --> 00:18:41,800
- Another! - No, come on, Buns, you've had enough.
391
00:18:41,890 --> 00:18:44,480
Right, then, port and poker!
392
00:18:44,480 --> 00:18:45,970
Money on the table.
393
00:18:46,130 --> 00:18:49,480
Actually, talking of money... About the access thing...
394
00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:53,050
Oh, that's all sorted. Worked something out with your fella here.
395
00:18:53,130 --> 00:18:54,290
Oh, come on.
396
00:18:54,570 --> 00:18:55,640
Good lad.
397
00:18:55,650 --> 00:18:58,400
Right, am I dealing everyone in?
398
00:18:58,400 --> 00:19:00,600
- Yep! - I'm afraid we don't play.
399
00:19:00,610 --> 00:19:02,490
I play. I'm a player.
400
00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:05,040
I'm not sure you are, Mike.
401
00:19:05,050 --> 00:19:07,080
I am a player.
402
00:19:08,010 --> 00:19:08,880
Ok.
403
00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:12,650
Right, well, I guess I'm getting the port, then.
404
00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:13,930
Deal.
405
00:19:16,890 --> 00:19:19,080
There we go. That's yours...
406
00:19:27,370 --> 00:19:28,880
I've lost 100 quid.
407
00:19:31,370 --> 00:19:33,160
Beginner's luck, I assure you.
408
00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:34,450
Another hand?
409
00:19:43,130 --> 00:19:45,080
She is beguiling, the Lady Rachel.
410
00:19:45,090 --> 00:19:48,240
Is it her hair? Perhaps it's her hair.
411
00:19:48,250 --> 00:19:50,280
There's something about her hair.
412
00:19:50,290 --> 00:19:53,880
I'm Phoebe. And Lady Button's Monica.
413
00:19:54,890 --> 00:19:56,360
And the Captain's Ross.
414
00:19:56,370 --> 00:19:58,720
What? No! I'm clearly Chandler.
415
00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:00,240
It's a dry wit, but it's there.
416
00:20:00,250 --> 00:20:03,050
I'm sorry, did we zip our lips? I think we zipped our lips.
417
00:20:15,050 --> 00:20:18,290
*There'll be a light*
418
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:21,970
*In the dark...*
419
00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:25,760
Robin! We're watching Friends here, mate!
420
00:20:25,770 --> 00:20:27,770
Right, I need your help.
421
00:20:28,440 --> 00:20:29,640
No, no, no. It's important.
422
00:20:29,650 --> 00:20:33,840
As is this! My empathy's hewn betwixt lovelorn Ross
423
00:20:33,850 --> 00:20:36,280
and Joey, the Veronan lothario.
424
00:20:36,290 --> 00:20:38,440
- No, you don't understand... - No, young lady,
425
00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:39,720
you do not understand!
426
00:20:39,720 --> 00:20:41,480
You cannot banish us with one breath,
427
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:43,760
and then demand our reinforcement with the next.
428
00:20:43,770 --> 00:20:46,360
No moonah stone, no help lady!
429
00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:49,250
- Oh, come on. Surely one of you will...? - Alison!
430
00:20:49,370 --> 00:20:54,050
Just to check, can I stops watching the pot now?
431
00:20:55,290 --> 00:20:59,720
- I can't play gambles. - No, no, you don't need to.
432
00:20:59,720 --> 00:21:02,560
Just look at his cards and tell me what you see.
433
00:21:03,130 --> 00:21:03,880
Yeah?
434
00:21:07,440 --> 00:21:08,960
Sorry. Needed a wee.
435
00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:11,240
Better out than in. I've dealt you a hand.
436
00:21:11,250 --> 00:21:13,080
Great. Great, great, great.
437
00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:18,770
In fact, why don't we make this interesting?
438
00:21:19,720 --> 00:21:20,930
Double or nothing.
439
00:21:21,250 --> 00:21:22,360
If you win the game,
440
00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:26,080
- then we pay you double what you wanted for access to our drive. - What?
441
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:27,800
40,000?
442
00:21:28,570 --> 00:21:30,080
And if I lose?
443
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:33,010
You sign it over for free.
444
00:21:33,890 --> 00:21:36,440
You're trying to bluff me!
445
00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:39,720
Nice try, but nothing gets past me, Annabel.
446
00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:40,600
You're on!
447
00:21:40,610 --> 00:21:41,930
Are you insane?
448
00:21:48,960 --> 00:21:50,120
Right.
449
00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:51,840
Ok.
450
00:21:52,400 --> 00:21:53,250
Yeah.
451
00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:56,730
There's a person whose blanket is also a person,
452
00:21:57,130 --> 00:22:01,760
but it's upside down and be like they've had a quarrel.
453
00:22:01,770 --> 00:22:04,600
There's a number more than three
454
00:22:04,610 --> 00:22:07,760
but with a shape that's like a loaf,
455
00:22:07,770 --> 00:22:11,050
but it's on its side, on the end of a wrong stick.
456
00:22:13,810 --> 00:22:15,600
Just pop a cheque in the post
457
00:22:15,610 --> 00:22:18,360
or a banker's draft, whatever's easier.
458
00:22:18,370 --> 00:22:20,360
Was I wearing shoes?
459
00:22:21,570 --> 00:22:24,290
Honestly. Can't take her anywhere.
460
00:22:24,530 --> 00:22:27,320
Come on! Silly moo.
461
00:22:27,400 --> 00:22:28,160
Ah, there you are.
462
00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:32,080
Now, it's saying to load the next disc into the...
463
00:22:32,090 --> 00:22:34,200
- We need disc two. Where's disc two? - Yes.
464
00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:38,000
Forget it, OK? Thanks to you, we just lost ￡40,000!
465
00:22:38,010 --> 00:22:39,370
- What? - Yeah!
466
00:22:39,380 --> 00:22:40,200
What did we do?
467
00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:42,080
Nothing. That's the whole point!
468
00:22:42,090 --> 00:22:44,840
40 grand? To that gasbag?
469
00:22:45,330 --> 00:22:47,210
What did you do, play him at poker?
470
00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:49,650
Oh, she did!
471
00:22:49,680 --> 00:22:52,530
Sorry, just to clarify, that was a firm answer on disc two?
472
00:22:53,090 --> 00:22:56,490
Word of advice "never play someone who can afford to lose".
473
00:22:56,680 --> 00:22:59,880
Not as if he needs the money either. Unless it's for legal fees.
474
00:22:59,960 --> 00:23:03,770
Maybe they've finally found out about that bank account in Fiji.
475
00:23:08,650 --> 00:23:10,930
Now, keys.
476
00:23:11,290 --> 00:23:14,170
Not sure you should drive, Buns.
477
00:23:14,330 --> 00:23:16,930
Oh, no! I'm fine. Look.
478
00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:23,840
- I stand corrected. - Yep!
479
00:23:24,250 --> 00:23:27,560
- Thank you for a lovely evening, Annabel. - Alison.
480
00:23:27,570 --> 00:23:30,600
And no hard feelings about the whole... you know?
481
00:23:30,610 --> 00:23:33,080
No, no, no, no, a deal's a deal.
482
00:23:33,250 --> 00:23:35,200
I was thinking of doing a bank transfer.
483
00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:35,960
Very modern.
484
00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:38,240
I'll "e-mail" you my details.
485
00:23:38,250 --> 00:23:39,650
Great, great.
486
00:23:39,850 --> 00:23:42,800
And is that for your current account or the Fiji account?
487
00:23:43,810 --> 00:23:45,490
What's the Fiji account?
488
00:23:48,850 --> 00:23:50,290
You know what?
489
00:23:50,530 --> 00:23:55,050
What's a little card game between friends, eh?
490
00:23:55,440 --> 00:23:59,600
Let's... Let's just forget this silly money nonsense.
491
00:23:59,610 --> 00:24:03,560
I'll sign over the access rights to you "gratis"
492
00:24:03,770 --> 00:24:07,160
and pop the papers in the post first thing.
493
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:08,770
Come along, Bunny!
494
00:24:12,090 --> 00:24:14,080
Was that lasagne beef?
495
00:24:17,290 --> 00:24:18,600
How did you know he had a...?
496
00:24:21,650 --> 00:24:22,720
Thank you.
497
00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:23,600
They're not here.
498
00:24:24,570 --> 00:24:26,210
They're upstairs watching Friends.
499
00:24:27,890 --> 00:24:29,490
- This place is weird. - Yeah.
500
00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:31,560
Look out, Bunny, that's the gate!
501
00:24:31,570 --> 00:24:33,050
I can see it!
502
00:24:33,370 --> 00:24:34,930
Still, that's one problem sol...
503
00:24:44,370 --> 00:24:48,210
I mean, I didn't like that pigeon, but that is no way to go.
504
00:24:48,680 --> 00:24:49,880
Better than being shot.
505
00:24:49,890 --> 00:24:50,600
Yeah.
506
00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:02,450
No second disc, guys.
507
00:25:03,130 --> 00:25:05,290
Could that be any more vexing?
508
00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:10,210
You all right, mate?
509
00:25:13,610 --> 00:25:16,560
What is it, you know, about the moon?
510
00:25:16,810 --> 00:25:18,250
Why do you care so much?
511
00:25:19,890 --> 00:25:23,050
Before you was moonah.
512
00:25:23,610 --> 00:25:26,880
Before house was moonah.
513
00:25:27,890 --> 00:25:31,450
Everything come, everything go.
514
00:25:32,290 --> 00:25:36,290
But always there. Moonah.
515
00:25:39,530 --> 00:25:42,490
The only thing that's been here as long as you have.
516
00:25:55,810 --> 00:25:57,650
Several of cubs.
517
00:25:57,680 --> 00:25:59,730
- Getting closer. - Knock-knock.
518
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:02,410
I say that cause I can't, um...
519
00:26:03,050 --> 00:26:04,730
I just wanted to say sorry...
520
00:26:05,290 --> 00:26:07,490
..for what happened at dinner. From all of us.
521
00:26:07,890 --> 00:26:10,280
Well, mainly from me, because Julian can take or leave you,
522
00:26:10,290 --> 00:26:12,320
and Lady Button's not keen, and as for the Captain, well...
523
00:26:12,330 --> 00:26:15,280
Pat, it's fine. I mean, well, no, it isn't.
524
00:26:15,290 --> 00:26:17,640
But...we'll muddle through.
525
00:26:17,650 --> 00:26:19,210
Eight of hearts!
526
00:26:19,330 --> 00:26:20,890
- Yeah! - Yeah.
527
00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:24,080
In that spirit, so to speak,
528
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:27,930
I actually had a little favour I wanted to ask.
529
00:26:28,720 --> 00:26:29,800
It's for Robin.
530
00:26:36,250 --> 00:26:38,730
Right, so, are you going to get the ghosts or...?
531
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:40,170
They're here.
532
00:26:41,250 --> 00:26:44,970
We might've missed the ritual this year, but...well...
533
00:26:45,850 --> 00:26:47,680
..to old friends!
534
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:49,920
- To old friends. - Old friends.
535
00:26:49,920 --> 00:26:51,290
God, I miss booze.
536
00:26:54,090 --> 00:26:56,320
Robin, light pollution.
537
00:26:57,130 --> 00:26:58,250
Oh, yeah.
538
00:27:08,010 --> 00:27:10,800
Pray tell, how you doing?
539
00:27:10,810 --> 00:27:11,800
No, don't.
38117
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof