Original subtitles

Well, you got her, eh, Reverend?

She's a looker, all right.

That boy...

Ah, her boyfriend.

Well, I have the doc here to take care of it anyway.

No. All right.

Well, we have another one, Doc.

Cliff. Where exactly are we anyway?

I don't know.

I think we're on a side road somewhere.

Could you be a little bit more specific?

Gloria, I've been driving all day without stopping.

Now I've stopped and I'm, uh, busy.

- Why don't you study the map? - Well, I am!

But it seems like we're in the middle of nowhere.

Cliff, are you sure you know where we're going?

Gloria...

we picked out a nice small town

where it's quiet and we're gonna have a peaceful, pleasant vacation.

Leave it to me.

Okay.

Wow, it sure is beautiful here.

Oh, Cliff, can you smell those evergreens?

Yeah! I'm standing right beside one.

Wow. It's so quiet.

Hello.

Oooh-oooh.

Oooh-oooh.

Cliff!

Cliff, I think it's about time we go now.

Cliff?

Come on, Cliff.

Cliff, I'm not coming in there after you.

Okay, stop playing games.

Cliff?

Cliff?

Oh, come on, I'm cold and I wanna go.

Cliff?

Cliff!

Oh, Cliff, where are you?

Cliff?

- Oh, my God... - Say, that you got troubles, eh?

You got the hump?

Oh, you are so sick!

Oh, Gloria, I just jumped out from behind the tree there!

Oh, Cliff, I don't find your jokes very amusing!

I thought it was funny, I didn't, uh... You didn't think it was... You okay?

Gloria, your heart's going a mile a minute.

You see?

I'm sorry.

Gloria, you know I wouldn't do anything to hurt you.

I've been calling you for fifteen minutes! I don't think you're very funny!

Oh, Cliff, where are we going anyway?

- I can't understand this map. Gosh. - I don't know, Gloria.

Now, we're going to Farningham.

No, no, no. Farnhamville.

That's right, Farnhamville the friendly city.

It's not that much further...

...probably 15 years.

So how much further do we have to go?

Uh... Ten, fifteen miles.

- What's the matter? - Nothing.

Maybe there's not enough air in the tires.

Cliff, you're gonna flood it.

I'm not gonna flood it, Gloria.

- Oh, I'm sor-- - You have to give the gas

enough time to come out through the...

carburetor, that's all.

We're gonna have to wait a while.

That's okay.

It needs air.

- When I tell you, start the car, okay? - Okay.

Not now! When I give you the signal!

Okay, try it now.

- Not the horn, the ignition, Gloria! - Huh?

The key. Turn on the key.

Try it now.

That's it.

That's it, you've got it.

- Come on, baby! - Come on, baby!

- Come on, baby! - That's it.

- That's it, you've got it. - Yeah, you can do it!

Come on, come on, baby!

You got it! That's it! Beautiful!

Farnhamville, here we come.

Dammit!

Oh, now that's nice.

You think that we're gonna go anywhere when you talk like that?

Cliff, the car understands. You have to be nice to it.

Now wait a minute.

Now, I know it's been hard on you, it's very cold outside

and I know that you'd rather just be sitting someplace,

but if you could help us out just this once, we'd really appreciate it.

Gloria, please.

Go ahead, talk like that. Don't be sarcastic

I wasn't sarcastic. Wasn't sarc-- Wasn't sarcastic, car!

- Wasn't sarcastic. - Go ahead.

- It's gonna start, eh? - Go ahead.

- We love you. - Love you. Love you.

God bless you, car.

Gloria, you should have been a mechanic.

Just wanna see if there's a place to stay around here.

Okay, I'm gonna see if there are any postcards.

Hi, postcards inside?

Hey, you seen this girl around?

No, who is she?

My sister.

- She's been missing for six months. - Yeah?

How about you? You seen her?

I wouldn't know, I'm just passing through.

- Pretty. - Yeah.

Well... if you see her around, I'll be in town, okay?

- Yeah, right. - Okay, thanks a lot.

Take it easy.

Yes, sir?

Yeah, I wanted to know if you could tell me if there's a place to stay around here,

a motel or something? Just, uh...

Drove up with a broad, wanna spend the weekend, you know.

Um... Yeah, there's a nice place,

Mrs. Wainwright's, about a thousand yards down the road there.

- It's pretty nice. - Yeah?

- Is it cheap? - It's quiet, you know?

- Yeah, reasonable, it's not too bad. - Okay, great.

- Thanks a lot. - Okay, take it easy.

You know, you shouldn't play with that thing. You might hurt yourself.

Hiya, Chief.

What did that first guy want?

Eh, he's checking up on one of the Reverend's girls.

The Reverend wouldn't be too happy about that, would he?

Nope.

Well, I guess we'd better take care of him, eh?

Hey, Mouse.

Why don't you follow me and we'll register in the office?

It's so nice to have you young people visit.

We hardly get anyone around here anymore.

But I don't understand. It's so beautiful here.

Yes, but it hasn't always been this way.

I guess that all the folks are scared off because of the legend.

Legend?

What legend is that, Mrs. Wainwright?

Oh, it's the legend about the three girls.

I guess it all started when these three beautiful girls

began luring men to their farmhouse.

- Good morning. - What?

Come on.

- Hi. - Hi.

Haven't seen you here before.

Oh, I don't drink much in bars.

Are you alone?

Mm-hmm. Oh, um...

- Can I join you? - Do you want-- Yeah, sure.

- Wanna sit down? - Thank you.

- I'll fix your chair. - It's fine.

- Is that a little too close? Maybe I can-- - No, no.

- Oh, oh, I'm sorry. - It's okay.

You must be new around here.

Ah, yeah, actually, I'm just sort of passing through town.

- Oh, that's too bad. - It is?

Well, it's just that I share a farm with two girlfriends just outside of town.

Oh, really? I'm very interested in farming.

- You are? - I mean, dairy farming mostly.

As a matter of fact, I'm sort of in the dairy biz. Well...

Well, it's too bad that you're just passing through

'cause I thought we could get together

and we could spend a few days up at the farm and have a really good time.

I'd like that.

Actually, I'm really just on my vacation and I could spend some time, but...

Uh... Won't your girlfriends mind?

Oh, no, they wouldn't mind at all.

In fact, they'd really love you.

- Fill it up, sir? - No, it's okay, I don't need any gas.

Listen, I'm in a bit of a hurry. Could you tell me how far it is to Buttonville?

Yeah, it's about forty miles straight down this road here.

- Forty miles, eh? - Yeah, there is a shortcut though.

Oh?

- Yeah, about three miles down here... - Yeah...

- There's a dirt road on the right-hand side. - Yeah...

Um... It'll cut your time in half, but it's pretty hard on your car.

Oh, don't worry about that, it's rented.

Listen, thank you very much. That's terrific.

Clarissa, can I have some more meat, please?

- Clarissa! - In a minute.

All we ever do around here is cook and eat.

Clarissa, can I please have some more meat?

Just a minute! If I don't cut it properly, it won't cook well.

I don't care how you cut it. All it want is about three more pieces.

- What's going on here? - Clarissa won't give me any more meat.

Clarissa?

If the meat isn't cut well against the grain, it will--

That's just fine the way it is.

He's very nice.

He'll fit in just fine.

- Hi, Earl. - Hi, Felix.

It's your roll, it's your roll, ready to go.

- It was my roll before breakfast. - Sure, it's always your roll.

- I own everything, you roll all the time. - Okay.

- Eleven. - Eleven.

Boardwalk.

I'm on Boardwalk.

Two thousand.

- I just got eight dollars left. - I'll take it.

- Is that the end of the game? - Yes, I win.

- I lose again? - Yes, you lose, I win.

Hi there.

- Rick. - Hi, Felix Frantzen.

- Hi, Felix. - Nice to meet you.

- He's Earl. - Hi.

Hi! Roll the dice.

- You guys live here? - No... No.

- Well, what are you doing here? - Just taking it easy.

Kind of waiting around, you know.

I gotta be out of here at 4:30.

- Where are you going? - Buttonville, I gotta parade.

- Oh, what are you gonna be? - No, I run the parade.

Oh, you mean you're like the grand marshal kinda thing, eh?

- No, I run parades, that's my job. - Oh, an organizer?

Yeah, it's Rick Parades Enterprises Incorporated.

It's me.

It's almost as good as what you do.

- What do you do? - I'm in the ice cream business.

He's president of Truck 12.

Okay, Earl, that's enough with the jokes, eh?

I gotta route, you know, driving the truck.

What about you?

- Me? - Yeah.

I'm rich.

Broads.

- You're here. Two of us. Three. - That's right.

- Earl. - Finally! One for you, one for you.

- Those broads? - We've been waiting all the time for you.

- This is what we've been waiting for. - That's right, you can't leave, man.

- Don't, forget that. - You'll blow it for all of us.

- I... I've gotta be in Buttonville. - We can score.

- I haven't missed a parade in eight years. - Have you ever had this good of a reason?

In case you hadn't noticed, I decided to stay.

Yes, it's rather nice to have a man around the house.

I notice you keep wearing the same kind of things, you girls.

Are you sisters?

No, we share a lot of similar tastes.

- Leona... - Yes, Felix?

You know, yesterday when we were out for a walk

and you kinda said you'd show me the house.

Oh, I will, I will. Just be patient.

Well, I've been here for three days.

Felix, you know we can't make love tonight.

No, but I thought just maybe a little heavy petting.

Oh, Felix.

So he landed on Boardwalk, had to pay me $2200

and I won my seventh game in a row.

Clarissa, that was a terrific supper. I mean, I really enjoyed every bite of it.

I ate everything, it was... just... just marvelous.

Food can be a marvelous appetizer.

I'm looking forward to the main course myself.

Now?

Before dessert?

It's all right. Come on.

Within me...

and without me...

I honour the blood

which gives me life.

- You know the owner? - Mm-hmm.

It was really worth waiting the three days.

Oh, Felix.

- I think you better go to your room now. - Oh, do I have to?

- Well, everyone will be getting up and... - Oh, I... I know.

Okay.

- One last kiss. - All right.

- Go on. - Okay.

Leona...

Leona, I...

Wh-What... What are you doing... No... no... no.

D-Don't.

Good morning, Rick.

Hiya.

Have you seen Anthea around?

No.

Know where she might be?

No.

Guess I'll look for myself then.

Morning, Bunker.

You know-- Oh.

You've really gotta see one of my parades. They're fantastic.

We got... We got clowns and kangaroos and roly-polies.

You know what's really strange?

Earl and Felix left and they didn't even say goodbye.

And Earl forgot his monopoly set.

Listen, do you wanna talk about them, or do you wanna be with me?

Within me...

and without me...

I honour this blood

which gives me life.

So that's the story of the three girls.

They were cannibals

and they ate men.

And rumour has it that they were never sick a day in their lives.

- Really? - Is this place still around?

The house is still standing, and it's a restaurant now.

They say the food is very good.

And if you like, I can take you there for supper.

We're not going to see any cannibals up there, are we?

Oh, no.

That happened a long time ago.

I'm sure you'll love the restaurant.

I'll meet you around five

after you've settled in.

- Cliffie... - Mm-hmm?

Have you been to a motel room with lots of women before?

No, you're the first one.

- Oh, am I, Cliff? - Mm-hmm.

- Gloria? - Yeah?

I think I'm gonna take my coat off.

- Oh, no, you don't have to, Cliff. - No, I want to.

- All right. - Okay.

Oh, no, Cliff.

There's not a television in our room.

What do you need a TV for when you got me?

- Know what we're gonna do? - What?

This afternoon, we're gonna take the car in to get fixed.

And we're gonna pick up some wine.

And then, uh...

Oh, Cliff.

Do you know what I want you to do more than anything right now?

- What's that? - Play your guitar.

Play my guitar?

- Yeah. You're my favourite musician. - Right now?

Okay.

Okay, I'm gonna play a... An English ballad.

- Yeah. - And, uh...

This is a song about... It's about you.

- Did you write it? - No.

Oh, is that what "English ballad"� means?

- Okay? - Yeah.

Oh, Cliff.

- Early one morning... - Cliff...

- What's up? - Do you like me?

Of course.

Early one morning

One morning in spring

To hear the birds whistle

The nightingales sing

I met a fair maiden

Who sweetly did sing

I'm going to be married

On...

Gloria?

Gloria?

I'm, um... gonna take the car in to get fixed, okay?

I'll be back in a couple of minutes.

- Okay. - Okay. Rest easy.

Okay, here.

- Big mother, ain't he? - Yeah.

What are we gonna do with him?

I don't know.

Hey, maybe we'd better check it out with the Chief, huh?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Anyways, that'll teach this guy from snooping around.

- Can I help you? - Yeah, there's something wrong in there.

- It was rattling or knocking. - Sounds like the carburetor.

- Well, leave it here. - Okay.

- I'll pick it up tomorrow. - Okay.

Sam.

Now try and remember.

Did anybody hear a scream or see any kind of a scuffle going on?

No, sir.

Now think carefully.

Did anybody see this man come into the alley?

No.

Well, he's as dead as they come.

Sure is.

Course, we can check all of this down at headquarters

and if there's any witnesses, well, they'll be taken care of.

But I think everything'll be okay.

Sam, I want you to do me a favor, all right?

I want you to take this body down to my wife.

She'll know what to do with it.

- Okay. - Okay?

Well, good afterncon, Mrs. Wilson. Can I help you with something?

I'm looking for a really good cut of meat.

- Ah, someone special for dinner? - Why, yes.

Mrs. Wilson, I just have...

Yes! This just came in this morning.

Is it really fresh?

Mrs. Wilson, if it was any fresher,

it would get up and tell you itself.

I'm sure you'll really enjoy the restaurant.

It has a flavor of its own.

- Is it very expensive? - Oh, Cliff, what a lame question.

The restaurant is run by a very engaging young man.

I'm sure you'll get along splendidly.

All the folks from around here eat there.

It's become a real tourist attraction.

But you shouldn't have any problem.

Now you see that path over there?

Just follow it, and make sure you don't miss the bend.

Just past a big tree, and a little bit to the right.

- And then-- - Thank you, Mrs. Wainwright.

...until you see the house.

- Bye-bye. - Thanks for everything, Mrs. Wainwright.

Bye-bye.

Have a good time. I'll see you later.

Eat well.

Cliff, there's something strange about this road.

- Yeah. It smells of manure. - Did you ever live on a farm?

Gloria, you don't have to be a farmer to know manure when you smell it.

- I thought it was your coat. - It is my coat.

Oh, Cliff, I'm cold. Let's go in.

- I guess this must be the place. - Yeah.

Wow.

I don't see anybody else here.

This doesn't even look-- Maybe it's in the other room.

- Oh... - Good evening.

Hi.

I'm the Reverend Alex Saint John.

- You are? - Oh, I'm sorry. We have the wrong place.

- We're here for-- - For dinner, yes, of course, my dear.

- Cliff Sturges. - How do you do?

Hi, fine.

- My dear. - Gloria Wellaby.

Gloria...

- Enchanted. - Thank you.

- Won't you come in? - Sure.

I thought we would need reservations.

Reservations? No.

- May I take your coat? - Sure.

- What lovely furs. - Thank you.

Thanks.

We don't really seem to be dressed for the occasion. Seems very formal.

Any way you are dressed is perfectly delightful, my dear.

- Will you sit down? - Right.

- You will excuse me? - Yes.

Cliff, what kind of a place is this?

- Freaky. - You're not kidding.

- Very theatrical. - Wow.

- You know something? - Yeah?

I've seen that man before.

No, no, no, no. I'm sorry.

No smoking allowed. It's one of the rules of the house.

- Just a few puffs? - Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.

Smoking's bad for the circulation

of the blood.

Oh, I didn't know that.

Well, actually, that's a very good rule to observe.

- The house seems very old. - Old. Yes, indeed, my dear.

The house is very old.

We have a few moments before dinner.

- May I show you around? - That'd be really fun, yeah.

Come. In here, my father's library.

He died with a book in his hand.

And in here, the study.

Now this is the Parford family.

Maybe you've heard of them.

The young lad was later suspected of having stuffed his mother-in-law

into an old roll-top desk.

Ah, she was a dreadful woman.

She was the chief carrier of a particular social disease

found in this part of the country.

Oh, Cliff, look.

This is my grandfather's piano.

He was a man of rare taste and gusto, a musical genius.

Sometimes still, you know, in the dead of evening,

religious hymns seem to fill this room.

That's amazing, Rev.

Do you know, just the other day, I thought I saw my distant cousin Rex.

It's rumored that he liked men, sometimes exceedingly well.

Ah, well. He did produce some very fine children.

Though, to be honest, none of them resemble him in the slightest.

Clifford, I think you'll be interested in this sword.

Now it was owned by a French executioner,

and legend has it that just as he was about to decapitate an innocent man,

it slipped out of his hand and cut off his own head.

- How horrible! - Well, these things happen, my dear.

Now, this fine set of silver was supposedly owned by the duchess of Milan.

Do you know she one night poisoned a whole dinner party just because she forgot--

Ughh!

I'm sorry, my dear. I forgot we were just about to sit down to dinner.

And this ugly assortment belonged to the three previous occupants of this house.

They were three perverted, awful young ladies.

I suppose I should take them down,

but there's a frightful curse hanging over them,

and I confess, I am a little bit superstitious.

Mrs. Wainwright always sends such charming guests.

Thank you.

Cliff... Cliff?

Do you see anything on here that you might like?

There's only one item on the menu.

Yes, Clifford. I think you'll enjoy what we have prepared for you.

- Well, we'll have two. - Two.

May I join you?

Thank you, my dear.

Mmm...

1913 was a beautiful year.

We grow the grapes ourselves.

Our own vineyards.

They grow on my grandfather's grave.

I don't know, there's something about...

human remains that add a certain earthy quality to wine.

- To grandfather. - Grandfather.

Mmm...

I notice a certain... intimacy between you.

- You've not been together long? - A mon--

- Two weeks. - Clifford, a month.

I understand, I understand.

And tell me, Clifford, what do you do?

- I play music. - Music?

What kind of music do you play, Clifford?

- Rock. - Bach? Have you seem my--

Rock. Rock. I'm a rock musician.

You know, Reverend, like The Rolling Stones?

I'm an axe picker.

An axe picker.

Clifford, you're a man after my own heart.

Me too.

Are you enjoying dinner?

It's delicious.

It's swell.

May I entertain you with stories of the house?

- I would just as sooner eat, Reverend. - I think it would be lovely, Reverend.

Very droll, Clifford, very droll.

Are you familiar with the legend of the house?

About the three cannibals? Mrs. Wainwright told us about it.

Ah, then you'll be interested to know

that this is the very table

at which the victims ate their last dinner on earth.

Clifford, let's go.

Uh, the bill.

Let's go.

- Let's go. Uh, change, change. - What for?

- For a tip in case-- - No, no...

You know, those tapestries hang really well from this side of the room.

- Yes, they do. - They do.

My dear.

Clifford, is this yours?

- Oh, no, it's ours, actually. - It's just the money I left out...

Please, please, please, please, please.

Dinner is my pleasure and my treat.

I owe you an explanation of the scream.

There's a maniac at large

and one of the girls thought she saw him peering in the kitchen window.

Oh, no, she was mistaken.

I don't think...

I'm ruining your dinner.

Let's have dessert.

I think you'll enjoy this.

This is a lovely dinner, dear. The food is terrific.

You really outdid yourself.

I did save the best parts for you.

I'd like to propose a toast to the Reverend.

Our guiding spirit.

To the Reverend.

"If music be the fruit of life... play on."

Ah... Shakespeare.

Are you familiar with this one, Clifford?

"It is the time of night

when graves have yawned and yielded up their dead

and yonder shines Aurora's harbinger,

at whose approach, ghosts, wandering here and there,

troop home to churchyards,

damned spirits all,

that in crossways and floods have burial,

already to their wormy beds are gone.

For fear lest day should look their shames upon,

they wilfully themselves exile from light

and must for aye

consort with black-browed night."

It sounds very familiar.

When the morning wakens,

then may we arise

pure and fresh and sinless

in Thy holy eyes.

Very good. It's very good.

Clifford...

The ladies.

- To the ladies. - To the ladies.

I am a lady.

Oh... Well, kid... um...

Wanna hit the road?

Okay. Lemme finish this.

Why don't you stay here the night?

No, we can't, Reverend. We have to get back.

Please, I have an old bed upstairs.

It's ancient, but it's comfortable.

Well, I think we've overstayed our welcome.

As you wish. The coats.

Clifford...

If you must go home, will you promise me one thing?

Sure.

As you're walking through the woods,

if you hear any noise,

would you run as fast as you can?

Promise me that.

And Clifford.

Don't look back.

Well then.

Oh, I'm sorry, Revie.

Good night, Clifford.

- Thank you for coming. - It's our pleasure.

Gloria.

Come, I'll show you to the door.

I think maybe we should stay here tonight.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

Hi, Reverend.

Uh, Reverend, we've changed our minds.

That's fine. Just fine.

I'm sure you'll enjoy the room we have prepared for you.

Come in.

This will be your room tonight.

It belonged to my Aunt Priscilla.

She died, poor thing, burned at the stake.

Oh, well. Your bedclothes are on the cupboard behind you.

- Have a very nice sleep. - We will.

- Thank you very much, Reverend. - Good night.

- Night. - Good night, Priscilla.

What will you have for dinner, my lovelies?

What will you have, hmm?

Not the fingers, my dear, not the fingers.

No. How about... muscles?

The arms.

Deep red meat of the arms.

What will you have, my dear?

The calves?

The rich, red meaty calves?

And my queen.

For you, the soft white meat of the thighs.

The rich, soft thighs.

And, my darlings,

we shall drink the blood of life.

The blood of life eternal.

And we shall live forever.

Forever.

You, my queens.

And I, your king.

- Oh, Cliff. - What?

You think we should now?

- Cliff. - Mm-hmm?

- Could you take off your glasses? - Oh, sure.

Oh, my God.

I'm sorry I've disturbed you.

Please don't worry about any noises in the night.

Pleasant dreams.

That did it. Can't do it now.

- Oh, come on, Gloria. - I'm not in the mood.

- Oh, Gloria. - Oh, Cliff, I can't.

- Cliff, I'm too scared. - Gloria, come on.

- No, I can't, Cliff. - Why?

- That man's gonna come in again. - He won't.

- No, I don't wanna, Cliff. - Gloria.

No, come on. Go to sleep.

Gloria...

- Are you afraid of him? - Yes.

The bearded penguin?

Cliff, please go to sleep.

Cliff, where are you going? Cliff, come back here.

Within me

and without me,

I honour this blood

which gives me life.

Come, my dear.

It's time to drink the blood of life.

The rich, red, warm

blood of life eternal.

Take the knife, my dear.

Take the knife and plunge it home.

Home...

to the warm, red sheath.

Higher.

Plunge it home.

Gloria!

Oh, please, help me.

- We've gotta get going and get help. - Oh, my God, I almost killed you.

- My boyfriend's back there... - Are you okay?

...and they're going to kill him.

- It's okay, I'm a doctor. - Oh, please.

It'll be all right.

- Relax now. - Oh, Doc. I wanna go.

I don't wanna stay.

Everything will be just fine.

- Please help me. - I will help you.

This is a mild sedative. I want you to take it now.

Here.

That will relax you. It will make you sleep.

Sleep. Close your eyes.

Relax. Everything will be fine.

Sleep.

Relax.

That's a good girl.

Leaky carburetor.

Cliff?

I must have flooded it or something. I don't know.

A '61 Cadillac, I mean, who expects trouble?

The guy said my fuel pump quit or the points needed sharpening

or piston's full of shit. I...

Cliff!

How did you get back here? How did they let you go?

I gave them a deposit.

We'll pick up the car tomorrow and I'll give 'em a check.

Oh, Cliff, I was so worried about you. Thank God for that doctor.

What doctor?

Cliff, did you put me back in these clothes?

How did we get back here?

Where's the doctor?

Gloria. Are you stoned?

Oh, wow. I don't understand.

You think I really had a bad dream?

I think you had too much pizza for breakfast.

Come on, Cliff, don't make jokes

when I'm really confused.

Well, there's a solution for everything.

Cliff, you always have the same solutions.

I know, but they always work.

Don't worry about her, my lovelies.

Our friends in town will take care of things.

Take a deep breath, tell me if you don't feel better.

I still feel a little dizzy.

Well, you'll feel a lot better once we get something to eat.

I don't know, Gloria.

I don't know how to explain it to you.

I guess, medically speaking, it's what they call "psychosomatic".

When the mind has some kind of influence over the body.

I think you were probably just afraid.

I mean, being in a motel with a guy for the first time.

- You mean like a d�j� vu? - Exactly.

A d�j� vu.

Being in a place you think you've been in before

when, in fact, you've never really been there in the first place.

Cliff, you make it sound so easy.

I think it's those stories the old lady was telling you.

Y'know, the one about the three girls and the house.

How do you know so much about everything?

I took Psych 101

before I got kicked out of school.

Yeah.

- You feel better? - I guess so.

I guess I just overreact to everything.

Do you mind if I call mum and dad just to let them know that we're okay?

I'll do it for you.

Oh, no, you'd better not. Mum doesn't like you.

- Operator. - Yes, operator.

I'd like to make a long-distance phone call collect to Toronto, please.

I'm sorry, but we are unable to complete any long-distance calls at this time.

Oh, well, if there's any problem, I'll pay for it here.

No, that is not the problem.

Last week's snowstorm knocked all the long-distance lines down.

There are no calls going through.

Well, operator, isn't there any other way I can get through?

It's a very important phone call.

I'm sorry, madam. There's nothing I can do.

Well, could I go to another phone?

Our servicemen are working to repair the lines.

Would you care to try again later?

- Operator, I'm... - I'm sorry.

Well, I'm glad you're enjoying yourself.

Just minding my own business here.

Cliff, I hate this town. It makes me feel so uncomfortable.

There's nothing wrong with this town, Gloria.

Cliff, I've been thinking. Why don't we go to a different place?

There's nothing to do around here anyway.

- Even if we wanted to go, we can't. - Why?

Because the car is in the garage getting fixed.

Oh, come on, all we have to do is go to the garage

and take it out and bring it back to Toronto to have fixed.

I know, but it's probably in a hundred pieces by now.

Can you think of any more excuses?

Why, you don't wanna go, do you?

Gloria, you're being totally unreasonable about this.

Well, I think you're being totally unreasonable!

You think I'm being totally unreasonable?

Well, look, why don't you do whatever you like?

I'm gonna take a bus back to Toronto.

Okay, take a bus back to Toronto.

- You'd let me, wouldn't you? - Have a nice trip.

Gloria, do whatever makes you happy.

And I'll do whatever makes me happy.

And you know what's gonna make me really happy right now?

A big chocolate milkshake.

Operator.

Yes, operator, could you please connect me with the bus terminal?

There is no bus terminal in Farnhamville.

You mean you have no buses going from here to Toronto?

I can't give out that information, you'll have to check the schedule.

Well, where do I get a schedule?

Edward's Drugstore has them. Would you like me to connect you?

Yes, please.

- Could you hold for a minute? - Yes.

Good morning, Edward's Drugstore.

Yes, sir. Do you have a schedule of buses going to Toronto?

- Yes, we do. - Oh, great, where are you located?

We're on the main street, right next to the post office.

Then I can come down right now and pick up a ticket?

Well, no rush, plenty of seats.

You can get the ticket just before you get on board.

But what time does the next bus leave?

Next Toronto bus leaves at 10:30 tomorrow morning.

Oh, no...

Well, if that's too early, you can have a bus at 10:30--

Thanks for stopping. Are you going to Toronto?

Hey, it's the postcard girl.

Are you having a good time in town, huh?

- Can I take you somewhere? - I thought you were somebody else.

I'm sorry. Thank you.

Hey, wait a minute, does this mean you don't wanna go anywhere with me?

No, thank you.

Stupid...

Well? You had enough?

Cliff...

Tell me that you love me and you want me and you need me and you'll never let me go.

I love you, I want you, I need you and I'll never let you go, Gloria.

Now come on. Let's take in the sights.

Uh, we can see the drugstore, a grocery store, there's a bowling alley...

- I don't believe it. - Oh, let's drop it.

Wow.

The Monster That Devoured Cleveland

and I Was a Teenage Centipede, both on a double bill.

I've already seen them.

- Want some meat pie? - I'd rather have a kiss.

Ow!

You almost took my finger off.

Oh, God.

Gloria, I haven't walked this much since I was in the cadets in grade 10.

Oh, Cliff, you were in the cadets?

Oh, no, I think the cadets are really great, Cliff, honestly.

I'm getting hungry again too.

What's the matter?

The meat pie had a funny taste to it.

Really? It was on sale.

Well, we could go back to the motel and get something to eat.

That is, if you'll carry me.

Hello, Officer.

You kids got business in town?

- Actually, we were just sitting-- - Come on, get in the car.

- We don't like vagrants around here. - We're not vagrants.

We have a room down at Mrs. Wainwright's motel.

You'd better not be lying.

We got ways and means of checking out, you know?

Besides, we don't fancy much of strangers around here.

Especially hippies and freaks.

- Oh, sir, you must be mistaken, we're not-- - Shut up.

Get in the car.

Now, where did you say you were going?

Um, to the restaurant.

That is, if it's not too much out of your way.

What do you think this is? A goddamn taxi?

Oh, Cliff, I'm not really hungry, are you?

Well, I could do with a bite to eat.

This ain't no joyride, you know?

I'd as soon run you clowns in than to hear any more of this guff.

What's the matter with her?

She's nervous, that's all.

She gets that way whenever she gets picked up.

Thanks a lot.

I suggest you don't change your mind again.

Because I'll be waiting right here for ya.

Sorry, Gloria.

I guess we'll just have to go to the restaurant.

- Cliff, this is the same-- - Gloria.

That's enough.

Oh, Cliff, I'm scared.

Gloria, you promised me.

Come on.

Cliff, this doesn't look like a restaurant to me.

Babe...

I really--

Cliff!

- Well, I brought her. - Thank you, Clifford.

Good evening, Gloria.

You'll stay to dinner?

Uh, Reverend, as a matter of fact, I'm not terribly hungry,

so I might just grab a bite.

I'm sorry, Clifford.

We haven't finished with you yet.

Gloria?

Gloria. This wasn't my idea, you know?

They made me do it.

Gloria. Hey, kid.

Come on. Come on now.

Gloria.

Gloria, I'm sorry.

No, no. No, no, no. No.

Now the day is over

Night is drawing nigh

Shadows of the evening

Steal across the sky

So that's the story of the four girls.

They were cannibals

and they ate men.

And rumour has it

that they were never sick a day in their lives.

Hey, that sounds great.

Do you think we can go up and see this place?

Certainly, I would be delighted to take you.

Have you a car?

Now what time would you like to go?

Subtitles by Marc Morris. < 2010 nucleus films ltd.