All language subtitles for My.Boys.S03E08.Friends.Of.Friends.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-FLUX_track3_[eng]

If friends
are like family,

then friends of friends
are like cousins.

Some can be cool,
some can be insufferable.

It can break either way.

Ah! Hey, guys!
Phil's coming by.

Oh, great.

Who's Phil?
He's a friend. He's,
like, our best customer.

You are gonna love him.
He's hilarious.

Hey, you know,
we wouldn't even know Phil
if it wasn't for the store.

Which proves my point
as to why we should
keep the store.

Except that he plays
in our online
fantasy league.

On the Internet.

Oh, man.
Here we go again...

People prefer
a face-to-face relationship.

Sure, but if
we're losing money,

we could cut
our overhead costs by
going completely online.

You know another way
to save money?

I could downsize
half my work force.

Oh, my God.
Don't you guys have
hours at work every day

to have the same argument
over and over again?

Not that this isn't
super entertaining.
Not at all.

All Mike does
is sing these jingles

that then get stuck
in your head
for the rest of the day.

♪ Nationwide is on your side

Ew. Now we're on
your side, buddy.

Hey, guys. Hey.

Who is ready
for the social event
of the season?

Yes, please.

I'm throwing my first
annual birthday bash
and all-girls' night.

Oh, good!

See, I love you and I
really want to celebrate you
any way that you want.

It's just, your friends
and I, we don't always
have a lot in common.

But some of them are new.

Maybe you'll have something
in common with them.

Do they squeal?
I bet they squeal.

Look, I understand.
Not everybody gets
along with everyone else.

Okay, good, because...

But, as an adult,
when I have nothing in common
with my friends' friends,

I make an effort
until I learn to accept
all of them.

Except Kenny.

Hey! Just for that,
I'm not coming.

Good. 'Cause
you're not invited.

Although I can understand
how the phrase "girls' night"
confused you.

Good one.
Are you turning 11?

Good one.
Who needs?

Peej, I judged
the Bacon Olympics.

I cheerfully participated
in boilermaker night.

And when you guys
waited outside in the cold
for those Springsteen tickets,

I rubbed Mike's feet
so he wouldn't lose a toe.

Ooh. That was sweet.
Bad friend.

God, you're absolutely right.
Okay, you know what?

I am going to make
more of an effort.

Or I could just buy you
something really expensive.

Your presence
will be gift enough.

Yeah, I guess you wouldn't
want a gift, because
you'd probably be afraid of,

"Oh, my God,
it's a candle!"

"It's a candle!
It's a candle!"

Bobby! What's up, buddy?
Hey, can you do me a favor?

Sure, man.
What's up?

It's about
your buddy, John.

All right.
Ever since we opened
the club together,

all he does is hang out
and give his friends
free drinks.

Isn't that why people
open bars?

Look, John put up
all the money, okay?
I brought the expertise.

We agreed to be
equal partners,

but now he just treats me
like I'm the bartender.

That sucks, man,
but what do you
want me to do?

Could you talk to him?

Look, you know,
the next time you guys
are hanging out

in your big,
fancy leather chairs,

sparking up your cigars,
you know, just slip it in.

Wait, wait. When did
I become the guy
from the Monopoly game?

If you think of it.
I don't know, man.

I don't know if
that's really my place.

Plus, we're pretty busy
covering the city
in windowless red hotels.

Hey, Kenny! Mike!
Hey, it's Phil!

Hey, Phil.
That's Phil!
No way.

How you doing?

Hey, Phil.
This is P.J.

Hi.
This is really a thrill.
I'm a big fan.

I read your column
all the time.
Is that cloying?

Not at all.

Well, you're just
a refreshing
new voice in sports,

and even better-looking
in person.

How about that?
Nope.

Wow, you're uncloyable.

That's not even
a real word.

I know that.

Let me get you
something to drink.
What are you having?

Oh. I'll have
a Harvey Wallbanger.

Thank you.

Sure.

It's a cute story.
A guy comes in...

Whoa!

What is he doing here?

Um... Who?

Did you just get here?
No. I've been hiding.

Why are you talking
to Dr. Clayton?

You mean Phil?
'Cause he seems nice.

He's the devil.

Okay, what is going on?

Why are you hiding?

He was our
couples' therapist.

He's seen
my innermost self.

And I owe him 150 bucks.
But mostly the self part.

And then,
between the Army
and med school,

I toured around
the country
with my music,

and had a brief stint
with Manhattan Transfer.

That was eight crazy days,
I gotta tell you.
Whatever you heard, it's true.

Get out.

Well, I'm going
to hit the latrine,
which is army talk.

Go ahead and order
another pitcher without me.

Isn't he awesome?

Why is he still here?

Andy, what are
you doing here?
I thought you left.

I couldn't. I want you
to ask him to leave.

He's our friend.
He's not your friend.

He's a therapist.
What?

Meredith and I were
having troubles, right?
So we went to see him.

But he's so nice.
I bet he's
a great therapist.

He's horrible.

All he did was sing
these stupid songs.

Oh! That guy.

Yeah.
Well, look,
he's our friend.

And he probably
doesn't even remember you.

Plus, he might spill some
of your juicy marital secrets.
I mean, that alone...

Hey, a guy can't go
loop his mule
without being replaced?

Hi, Phil Clayton.

Hey. Andy.

Hey, Andy.
How are you?

Or, as my wife calls me,
Mr. Wonderful... Happy...

I'm happily married.
Yup. Yup.

Well, good for you.

I know you're new here,
but feel free
to be embarrassed for him.

So, P.J.'s a writer, too.
This is Madison.

She wrote a book
about working as
a bachelor party stripper.

Oh, wow,
so you were interested
in stripping?

Oh, no. I was interested
in selling a book.

Oh, for my book,
I pretended to be ugly.

It was hard.

But in this marketplace,
you can't succeed
without a personal brand.

I don't have a brand.
Are you kidding?
You have a great one.

Down to earth,
Midwestern girl next door
who can hang with the boys

and would be so pretty
if she put her hair down.

Yeah. You're a Twister
era Helen Hunt.

Yippee!

Who wants more wine?

Or beer, whatever.
Let's go.

Stephanie, I am really trying,
but your friends are intense.

They're just motivated.
And it's so great. I get to
be the laid-back, nice one.

Really?

They call me
Margaritaville.
Yeah.

Look, they really are nice,
and you said you'd make
an effort.

Yeah. If I do it for a year,
can I write a book about it?

Hey, Margaritaville!
Emily's here.

I'm so sorry I'm late.
I was helping
my grandma move.

Oh, Emily.
This is my friend P.J.

Hi, nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you.

So, did I miss
all the squealing?

So, Gore daughter,
Gore daughter,
Chelsea in the back.

Like, "No, no.
We shouldn't do this!"

I'm like, "It's fine.
I got that Secret Service
dude's gun."

What's gonna happen, right?

John, I thought
we were gonna go over
the accounts today, man.

Yeah, of course.
Right after you get
us another round.

So, I'm like,
"Okay, left at the mall?
Right at the mall?

"I gotta find
the Potomac!"

He's making me
refill his glass, man.
Help me out here.

Boy, I know how he feels.

My business partner
doesn't appreciate me, either.

Business partner?
Did you get another job
I'm not aware of?

Is that Dr. Clayton?
Did you invite him here?

To my sanctuary?

I thought
you hated this place.

I hate everything.

Is there a doctor
in the house?

Good to see you, Doc.

Good to see you guys.
How are you?
And it's Andy, right?

Yup.
Wow. You do
look so familiar.

You know, I've been
trying to place you
for days now.

I was talking to my wife,
Suzanne, and I said,

"I think it's the guy
who painted our den."

But then, he had one arm.
So, that wouldn't be you,
would it?

Andy can't paint.

And then I thought,
"I know how I know you."

Look, Dr. Clayton...

You used to have
season tickets
right behind me

at the Bulls games.

You got me.

Yeah. I sure do.

- Go Bulls!
- Yeah!

Go Bulls!
Go Bulls!

Recognize the back
of that head?
There it is.

Boyfriends suck. Jim went
ahead with his appendectomy
on my birthday.

Ladies, ladies,
I think you're being
a little too picky.

That's your problem,
Stephanie.
You're too forgiving.

See? I'm
the forgiving one.

So, P.J., do you
have a boyfriend?

I do. I do.

I'm a little embarrassed
to bring him up, though.
I actually like him.

God, I like
my boyfriend, too!

We better not tell
the rest of them, though.

Don't want them
to feel bad.

And that's when I stole
the bust of Lincoln from
the headmaster's office.

Wait, wait, wait.

Why did a boarding school
in Switzerland have
a bust of Lincoln?

I don't know.
That place was crazy.

I was learning grammar
from a German lady.

Uh...

Actually, buddy,
I gotta wake up
early tomorrow.

Oh. Okay.
Let me get my coat.

Okay.

Did you talk to him yet?

No. No, I'm sorry, man.

I guess all that good,
free Scotch just drove it
right out of my head.

You're killing me, man.

Come on. I don't know
how much more of this
I can take.

Hey, don't worry.
I am on your side.

Like Nationwide Insurance.

Oh. Man.
I just got that jingle
out of my head.

I used to go watch
a lot of baseball

when I lived on this farm
with this Amish family.

I'm sorry, you lived
with an Amish family?
Yeah.

No electricity, no TV,
nothing for a year.

That's amazing.
Are you going to write
a book about it?

You know,
some things you just do.

See? That wasn't
so bad, huh?

You know what?
Emily is pretty great.

Yeah, right?
And I knew you two
would hit it off.

Yeah.

Oh! Why don't you come
do girl stuff with us?

Yeah, we're gonna
have high tea
at the Four Seasons,

and Madison is organizing
this pole-dancing
empowerment class.

Great.

Oh! And next week,
Kensington is having
a sex-toy party.

Man, whatever happened
to just getting
your nails done

and bitching about
whoever wasn't there?

Oh, yeah, it wasn't bad.
I met this girl, Emily,
who's really cool.

Of course, I'm never
going to see her again

unless I want to strip
or buy pink vibrators, but...

Tell us more
about this Emily.

Why don't you just
ask this Emily girl
to hang out?

It's not that easy for girls.
These are, like,
really treacherous waters.

You know what I mean?
You have to navigate
and negotiate

very, very carefully.

Hey, you guys.
Hey, Steph.

Oh, hey. Hey, did you
want to grab dinner
on Thursday?

Sure.
You know,
we should invite Emily.

Sure.
And boyfriends, too?
Why not?

Great.
Anyone need anything?

I'm good.
Okay.

Wow! Wow!

That was like
the Cuban missile crisis.
Am I right?

Mmm-hmm.

- Really?
- You'd do anything...

I'd do anything?
Yeah.

Are you high?
No.

Okay. Phil,
back me up here.

Will you tell this idiot
that online is
the smart way to go?

Smart?

Every time I get back
from lunch, I expect to find
you've traded the store

for a handful
of magic beans.

Phil, you're a mental
health specialist.
Mmm-hmm.

Will you tell this guy
to shut up?

Well, first of all,
don't fight.

I apologize for Mike.
Frequently.

Oh, really?
Sorry.

Look, you can work
this thing out.

You know, it just tears me up
that you can't see how much
Mike looks up to you.

What?
Nobody looks up to Kenny.

You know, I'm sorry,
but that attitude is
not helpful.

I could kiss you.

You wouldn't like the beard.

Look, you don't have to agree
with all of Mike's ideas,
but they are valid.

Really? I told you.

You know, a friendship
and a business relationship
are hard to balance.

Mike's in a subordinate
position at work,

so if you ignore
his ideas,

he simply assumes
that's how you see him
the rest of the time.

But I don't.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, too.

Wait a minute.
That was actually helpful.

Yeah. And free of charge.

And now I am going to
sing you a little song

about a couple I know
named Claire and Anthony.

Are those patients?

It's okay. They're
not together anymore.

So, I spent the better part
of the afternoon
slugging kegs around,

while John went through
the better part of
a $1,000 bottle of cognac

with a Pussycat Doll.
Which one?

I don't know.
The mean-looking one.

He's so irresponsible.
Man, you've got
to talk to him.

Brendo, here's the thing.
If you want to be
equal partners with John,

you're going to have to learn
to manage him yourself.

I know,
but it's just gotten so...

Plus, at this point,

you've probably spent
more quality time with
the guy than I even have.

I mean,
I'm not even sure
we'd still be friends

if we hadn't killed
that homeless guy together.

Don't tell him that.
He wants to believe you.

Okay, Bobby,
come on, come on, come on.
We're going to be late.

Get your shoes on.

Peej, I don't understand.

If you're trying
to make a new friend,
how come I have to come?

Because if we're
couple friends,

then she and I
can be friends.

And, you know,
we could really use
some couple friends.

Hey, Kenny and Mike
are kind of a couple.
Mmm.

I'll go get my shoes.

Hey, Steph.

I feel like death.
I can't go out tonight.

Oh, no.

Hey, Stephanie's sick.

Well, you know,
I guess we'll
just reschedule.

Oh, man, that sucks.

Madden?

We can.
But I don't see any reason
why you shouldn't still go.

Oh. I don't know.

Hey, she doesn't see
any reason
we shouldn't still go.

But, it wouldn't be weird?

Really. I insist.
All right.

I guess you call me
if you need anything.

Okay.

All right.
Couples' night is still on.

Yay!

Oh.

Here they are.
Do I look okay?

It's just a friend
of Stephanie's.
I know.

I haven't made
a new friend in a while.

Do we still make
each other bracelets?

I mean,
I used to offer to show
the other kids my horse,

but Butterfinger
died years ago.

Relax, we're not even sure
we're gonna like them.

Hi, guys. Hi.

I'm so sorry that we're late,
but we just put a down payment
on a Party Barge.

Yeah. We have
a lake house in Michigan.

We love to have
people out to sample
our home-brewed beer.

I'm Bobby.
I'm thinking of
buying a horse.

I am still so impressed that
you're a pediatric surgeon.

I mean, my God,
you do something
for the world.

It's just like operating
on anybody. Just smaller.

You know, Sean,
I just wanted to offer,

since P.J. and I
are both sports writers,

if you ever need tickets
to any games...

Oh, cool. You know,
the kids at the hospital would
really enjoy going to a game.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure.
Of course. But, I mean,
you'll come with them, right?

Oh, yeah.

I think he's in love.

Well, I am so sorry
that we have
to rush out of here,

but we have
two golden retrievers
at home that must be walked.

You have dogs?

Yeah.
Yeah.

Scout and Buster.
The sweetest dogs ever.

Scout and Buster.

It's perfect.
It's so perfect.

All right, well,
we'll have to do this
again real soon.

Absolutely. Yeah.
Yeah.

- Okay.
- Great meeting you guys.

Nice meeting you.
We'd love it.

Take care.
Good night.

Oh, my God,
can we keep them?

Oh, I know, right?

They read.
They travel.
They sail.

They were adults.

Sean heals sick people.
I mean, can you imagine?

I know.
Did you hear the way
she said tricolore?

I bet she speaks Italian.

You know, you were right.
We have needed couple friends.

Our other friends have
been holding us back.

Now we can go
to wine tastings.

And apple picking.

And Gospel Brunch!

And Gospel Brunch.

I also make
a great tortilla soup.

I mean, what
Renaissance man doesn't?

John, hey.
Hi, guys.

Can I speak to you
for one second?
Yeah. Sure.

Excuse me for one second.

They're great,
aren't they?

Yeah, two drivers' licenses
from Guam.

What are the odds?
Listen, we're equal
partners in this,

but since we've opened,
I've kind of been doing
all the legwork,

and you're sort of treating
this like some personal party
you're throwing, okay?

It's not fair.

I understand
what you're saying.

Dude, that's great
because I really...

But the fact that I put up
all the money makes me
an equaller partner than you.

You know?
So, there's that.

You know what?
I quit. Okay?

Now you can bartend
and you can do the schedules.

You can book the bands.
You can stay two hours after
close to check the registers.

And if you want
a full staff tonight,

you can talk down
the two waitresses
crying out back

because they're in
a love triangle with
the skeevy barback.

Oh. The one
with the Camaro?

They all have Camaros.

But is he the one
with a switchblade?
I'll let you find out.

So, I'm getting
a big bump in salary,

we're gonna split
our duties
down the middle,

and Thursday night,
Brendo gets to hold court.

Why Thursday?
Well, 'cause John gets

to hold court Friday,
Saturday, and every
other day of the week.

He did put up
all the money.

Hey, Peej.
Have you heard
from Emily yet?

No. But she said
she'll call.

Should we call them?
We should call them.

Well, it's only
been a day.

Right. Right.

Hold on.
I think it's finally time
for a showdown.

Hey, Andy!
Hey.

You know, I was thinking,
we should get
our Bulls tickets back, huh?

I'll call tomorrow
and you can write me a check.

It's $3,500.

All right.
That's it. All right?

I never went
to a Bulls game
with you.

You were
my couple's counselor
and you were terrible.

Now, come on.
Wait a minute...

You gave Kenny
and Mike better advice
in three minutes

than you did
the entire time with us.

You and Meredith
are still together, right?
Yeah.

I remembered who you were
all along, Andy.

I just didn't want
to embarrass you.

Oh, really?
Every patient is different.

Kenny and Mike,
they just needed
to clear the air.

Now, you two?
You needed a hobby,

something you could
share together.

And that was hating me.

Wait, you can't tell me
that was intentional.

I think the results
speak for themselves.

I'll also bet you $150
that you and your wife
make love tonight.

Excuse me?
Come on.

"Guess who I ran into today?"

"Oh, that quack?
Oh, he's infuriating."

"Yeah, he's the worst!"
"I love you."

"Oh, I love you, too.
I'm taking my blouse off now."

"Oh, don't forget
the mayonnaise
and the chocolate syrup."

"And we'll put on
the Barry Manilow records,

"or would you rather
have Sinatra?"

"Let's let the dog be
in the room this time.
That's always fun."

Well, we missed you.
We had such a good time.

Really?

Yeah, and thank you.

They're our first
couple friends, you know?

I mean,
Emily hasn't called yet,

but we were thinking of,
I don't know,

doing something couple-y,
you know,

like getting tickets
to Wicked, or something.

Yeah. About that,
I don't think Emily
will be calling.

Why? Everything went so well.

It did. It did,
and she adores you.
And Sean does, too.

It's Bobby.
Bobby?

Yeah, Sean felt
he came on
a little strong.

He thought the whole
nice thing was an act.

Bobby is nice.
Oh, I know.

I mean,
birds practically land
on his shoulder.

Disney would
write songs about him
magically appearing

if you wish hard enough.

What is wrong
with these people?

I don't know, I don't know.
Friendship is
a tricky thing, you know.

I mean, the chemistry
has to be just right.

And you know men.

I don't know why
they have to make
everything so complicated.

Oh! You're telling me.

I just don't understand.
Did Emily give you
any reason?

Um...

She said I came on
a little strong.

Oh, Peej.

All right.

Hey, we lost a friend, too.
Phil's not coming
around anymore.

Yeah, apparently Andy
caused a terrible scene

making all kinds
of crazy accusations.

I just told him
who I was.

And he pointed out
how you're always
undermining the two of us.

He's trying to make me
a common enemy
to save your relationship.

Well, I don't
play that game.

Yes, Andy. Phil's
a master manipulator.

Actually, Phil did say
he was paranoid.

God, making
new friends is hard.

I have a bad feeling
we're stuck with each other.

Well, hey, we do cover
all the key demographics.

I mean, you've got
your sensitive,
yet strong, modern man.

The hard-working entrepreneur.

The guy who can do this.

The brother who's afraid
to feel his feelings.

And the handsome guy
who defuses their
jealousy with humor.

Ooh. When does
that guy get here?