Original subtitles

Previously on The Real Housewives of New York City. I might do the egg freezing

thing. I don't know. With inflation, the cost of eggs have just gone up.

A pint of milk as well.

We're going to Angela.

It's like abject terror for me. I'm not going to be in a bathing suit. It's warm

on my skin. Does it still bother you after all this time? Yeah, I know.

It's a genetic disorder. Like, most people are like, oh, you're dirty.

Do we know when Jenna's getting here? No. She told me she was flying down two

days early to tan because of her genetic disorder and she feels uncomfortable.

And then she was like, the truth is, I'm not flying down with you guys because I

don't fly coach.

Ew. Okay.

Hi.

Yeah, we're really annoyed you didn't fly with us. If I looked like you, I

wouldn't have come. Set the cop out.

Stick to the ingredients?

Darling, it's me.

My laugh is maybe fake, but I definitely keep it real.

I'm a true New Yorker. The only bull I'll take is by the horn.

I always bring the flavor. It's not my fault you don't have any fakes. In New

York, there's a lot of bad apples, but I'm the baddest of the bunch.

I love to laugh. It'll make me mad, and I'll date your dad.

I've been out on the ocean, searching for something that ain't blue.

Should I? No, definitely not.

I don't have time for underwear. Definitely do not. Guys, you ready? I

were going somewhere more fancy.

Okay, bye. We're coming, we're coming.

I'm going with my cat.

That's very Rihanna of you.

Rihanna does that?

Yeah. Whenever she leaves the restaurant, she just walks over with the

the mug. She has a collection.

Hi, am I getting in the front again?

Like sitting in coach.

Oh,

well then you should be skilled at it. I'm ready to eat.

I smell pot.

Is it weed or it might be like a raccoon or something?

Yeah, it is a raccoon. Yeah.

Skunk, you mean skunk. Skunk.

Skunk. Do you guys have skunk here?

No. Oh, no. Just a lot then.

I'm excited about hitting the beach in the morning. I know. I can't wait.

the plan tomorrow?

Beach for breakfast, and then we're going to go out for lunch, and then

going to go out for dinner.

This is such a side vacation.

The dream vacation is...

Food, some water time, food, relax a little bit, and then a snack, and then

just go to dinner.

This is the best vacation.

Do we have any time to, like, hang out at the beach? Oh, we might do some

shopping, I think, after lunch.

Oh, this is so cute. It's so cute.

Guys, you ready?

Ready. I'm not starving.

Booba, how are you doing walking in the sand with those? I literally warned

everyone. I did. She did. I listened. I didn't listen.

Hi. Welcome to the Sunshine Shack.

This is beautiful.

The Sunshine Shack. This is awesome. You guys have a wonderful evening. Thank

you. Why are you so far away from me? Sit next to me. Okay. Good evening,

ladies. Good evening. Hello.

We have a special drink tonight, please. Oh, really? What's that? It's Sunshine

Shack special.

It's SFF.

So it's passion.

I want no alcohol.

Virgin. I'll have virgin too.

So two virgin. Two virgin and four very strong. Thank you. Four very sexy, non

-virgin, bloody.

This is very nostalgic for me. It reminds me of back home.

I remember my mom, when she was younger, she didn't have money to put the thing

that you put inside. So they would go to bed early at night.

That's sweet.

You know I've never been to Africa?

I gotta take you.

Don't watch what they will show on TV.

That's not Africa.

Africa is the shit.

This place might be heaven, Africa is paradise.

It just doesn't have a very good PR.

We need Jessel. We need Jessel to PR for Africa.

The sand is so soft. I know, right?

Jenna,

you wore heels? No, she wore flats. Those are really cute. That is not a

sandal. They're like studded Prada gold situation.

You can get those in Amazon.

Except for it says Prada and not Prada.

Prada. Prada.

You are?

Who is the virgin?

Virgin? One here and one here. Okay, you are?

Cheers. Cheers. Welcome, welcome.

Hi. Can I borrow this dress? Yes, you can. Thank

you. We'll do a dress swap.

Yes, not wife swap.

Dress swap. Don't even.

Now, once you're ready to get a divorce...

Just like a swamp that was a good one Jessa. I know that we be done with the

combo Speaking of wife's wife, whatever these five things you would you be mad

if she made that comment about David?

I Don't give it You would not give up don't ask me that I'm a terrible person

to ask that just hyperlatic

I so much appreciate Uba right now. Like, she's just

such a loyal friend. She fully has my back. And she's speaking up when nobody

else did.

But seriously, I do want to truly, genuinely apologize for saying that your

party was boring.

You weren't flirting with him? What were you doing? Like, comedy hour?

Yes, it is. Oh, really?

Your party was not boring. It was. I said it. Thank you. Hang on. It was

said it because I wanted to hurt you.

I was just very, very hurt because you were accusing me of something really

disgusting. That wasn't true. I wasn't accusing you of anything.

You can't be flirting with your husband. I've never cheated. I've never flirted

with someone's husband.

I've never done that. I won't do that, let alone to a friend.

I wouldn't. You know me. I wouldn't. I'm just surprised that you're apologizing

about the party being boring, but not about... It was a horribly mean thing to

say, and it wasn't true, and I only said it to hurt you.

I'm so confused. I'm sorry. I'm actually, like, very confused.

What are you confused about?

I thought that you were going to apologize for talking about divorce and

swap and making those jokes. That was worse.

Well, I... Okay, that was an inappropriate, like, bad timing to make

that. So I'm sorry for that.

Thank you.

You think those are appropriate jokes to make?

Look. Which jokes, but honey, you weren't there. At the time, at the time,

was laughing, she was laughing, we were all laughing. And it was all done, it

was all done in a way that, like, I honestly didn't even think that you

upset about it. Truly. I think it's foolish.

I think, like, if someone said that to your husband, you would be really mad.

Like, that's not true. It depends on who it is. You would be mad. Look, I...

Tell me what I said then. Abe was laughing. That's not... Abe was talking

being a divorce lawyer. He was like, well, you know I'm a divorce lawyer, so

maybe should I look into it? I didn't think it was appropriate.

I'm allowed to have that feeling, and why do we have to be talking about it?

I already apologized about it. And I said thank you. Yeah. So can we all

apologize and then respond?

I don't get any sort of apologize for being accused of something that awful.

I'm supposed to apologize to you?

He was walking up to find me to say our vows, and that was the joke that you

decided to make. I didn't think it was appropriate.

I'm allowed to have that feeling. I don't get anything to apologize for

accused of something now.

I'm supposed to apologize to you?

Can we just order some food? Okay, amazing. I'm going to have this snapper.

Why are you calling him over? We're having a conversation.

And maybe cider rice.

If anybody wants to share.

I have to eat, okay?

Wrap it up, girl.

Do the salmon.

No, like we're trying to finish the conversation.

Let's just finish the conversation.

I'm going to have the lobster.

Oh, Jeff caught it today.

Fresh macaw from the water. See the beautiful water? Yeah, okay.

I'm going to have the snapper.

Fresh macaw again.

Let's just, how do we kill this?

I just, look, can I say something? I don't think it's time. I don't think.

Let's just allow us to talk. We don't need you to referee.

Okay, but I just want, I'm over it. It's ridiculous. I can't get a word in. I'm

trying.

The reason I was being normal with you today is because I know you didn't mean

it in a malicious way. Okay, thank you. I know that. Thank you. That being said,

I just, all I'm saying is that I think I thought it was an inappropriate place

to make those types of jokes and it hurt my feelings.

Can we just, like, squash it and just, like, move on?

Yeah. And I'm truly sorry.

And I was trying to do a little Larry David bit, and it was bad timing. Whoa,

don't burn your... And by the way... I love... I trademarked A for B.

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah.

Dumbest apology ever.

I never wanted to really hurt Erin at her kind of boring party.

But I don't feel like she was really flirting with Abe.

I know in my soul's soul that I didn't flirt with Abe.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

That's messing with someone's family, and that's, like, something I would

do. I care too much about her, and I care too much about our friendship.

And I care way too much about Abe.

I have to stop. I can't.

All right, is there anything else that we need to clear the air with?

Yeah, nobody say I look beautiful today.

Jenna, just why don't you guys, like, let's just be done with it.

Who doesn't prefer business over coach?

It's not why I didn't come with you and you don't.

I'll be back.

Do you actually believe that I didn't come with you because I didn't want to

find coach? Like seriously, do you actually believe that?

Seriously? You really believe that?

I do.

It was not the case at all. I think that's like a big part of it. It really

wasn't. I don't think anything you say while you are post -op.

from anesthesia should be held against you. I don't think that's fair.

I just want to, like, go.

The only thing I remember from, like, my post -op haze is there was soup

involved. But beyond that, I literally have no idea.

Although I did fly business.

But I still get a pass for that, because who cares?

And by the way, it was coming from, like, a good place, and we wanted you to

part of it. Yeah, I wanted you to be a part of it. Whether I was there on the

plane or not. That's not true.

See, maybe that's the problem.

It never would have occurred to you that you would have cared. You exclude

yourself. You give us gifts instead of, like, connecting.

There are gifts over there, and you get free presents. That one's for you,

Jekyll. Oh, my goodness.

I've just been collecting all these presents for you guys for the past two

months. By the way, I love all the gifts. Keep giving them, please.

Because they're lovely.

But it's going to continue to be, like, keep giving me dope shit.

But then not sharing. You tell random strangers what your real name is and so

does your brother. And I have to hear it from Cy.

And I've shared so much with you. And I feel like I don't know much about you. I

don't know much about your personal life. I mean, I feel like I got to know

a little bit better through interviewing other people.

My name is not my real name.

So my name is Judith when I was growing up.

I'm looking at our friend group and it makes me feel like Jenna doesn't feel

comfortable sharing with us.

Are you dating now?

I am.

Who's the lucky lady?

How are you feeling? I know that you and your girlfriend broke up.

Probably don't want to talk about it.

We have to change this situation.

And I totally, I can appreciate that.

But I think that if someone is struggling, like for instance, I

across from that girl and she was shaking so badly. And so by talking

something that happened to me, it felt a little easier for her. I knew it would

take the focus off of her.

Well, you're saying you're talking about a model who sits there and crying and

shaking in front of you. I've cried and shaked in front of you. And you didn't

tell me that your real name was Judith.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait a minute. Those two things have nothing

to do with each other. There hasn't been an opportunity for me to be like, hey,

by the way.

Did you know my name is not Jenna? Like, on what planet does that make sense?

The only time that my brother and sister and I lived with my parents was the

first six months of my life.

And we lived in, like, Section 8 housing, whatever.

Just so you know, my name was Judith when I was growing up. Oh, my God!

What? Stop! Why are you in this conversation?

I don't know. I'm not really sure why I'm getting called out for it. That's

the moment for me to start talking about myself.

If you had started talking about yourself in that moment, I would have

you. I mean, that was, like, not the moment. I'll say that...

I did feel like you opened up a lot in your apartment.

Everything hurts, and I can't brush my teeth, and I feel gross. You can't?

I can brush the top, but they don't want me to brush down the bottom. Can I,

like, see anything?

Oh, whoa.

Whoa. What is that?

So the reason I'm having all this work done is because I don't, none of my

are in my mouth. They're my own.

I think maybe you're just a little bit more guarded. It takes a little bit more

time. Yeah, I am guarded. I have been so many times.

And that has nothing to do with you guys. And, like, if that comes off as

wanting to participate or not wanting to try or not wanting to be a friend,

like, I apologize. That's not my intention at all.

Realest thing you said.

Yeah. Yeah. That's why we appreciate that. And notice how we all shut the

up. And she's so nice. You okay?

Yeah.

Jenna, be careful. That fish has so much bones. Oh, really? Yeah, really. A lot

of them.

Don't feel bad, Jenna.

I'm okay.

Are you?

I'm great.

You're not.

I'm fine.

I'm gonna cry.

Baby, don't.

I'm sorry.

It's tough. I know it's tough. It's tough.

I know it's tough. It's tough. I just took a bunch of bones.

Bones. There's so many.

We love you, Jenna. Yeah.

Aw. So hard.

I think this concept of, like, opening up, it's not, like, easy for me. Like, I

grew up in a very quiet house.

My mom had really severe Asperger's, which means there was no noise in our

house, so we weren't allowed to talk.

And she was a piano teacher, so there was no noise at all, because we

I had the television on. I had to go to my room and just be quiet after school.

And my mom didn't have any friends.

And so I just didn't grow up with that. I didn't know she had Asperger's, and I

didn't really know what was going on until I was 44.

Like, I didn't grow up with anyone really wanting to.

And I'm not trying to paint a sad story. I'm really not.

This is not a sad story. This is your story.

One of the things that is a side effect of my mother's disorder is, like,

there's zero emotion.

Zero. There is just...

When I was a kid, I didn't know anything else.

And it helps us understand then stop and why you do things. Because when you

don't tell us stuff, then we think, you know, we make an ass out of assuming the

worst. I understand, but don't assume, then just ask.

How about not assume? How about give me the benefit of the doubt first?

Nothing is ever as it seems, ever. There's always something underneath.

No one's bad.

People are just broken. We're all just broken.

None of us are perfect.

Meaning, what I mean is, like, everyone's had their shit.

I know for a fact that out of you four, none of you had it easy. I know not as

much of your story, not because you're hiding it, but just because I haven't,

like, heard much about the way you've grown up. Yeah.

I don't know anything about how you grew up. Me neither.

What's up with you? I don't know. What can I tell you guys?

My parents are from Africa, and we came to England as immigrants.

Really? Yeah, a lot of people actually don't know that.

Kind of crazy because obviously I'm Indian.

Really? But my grandfather had to move from India to East Africa for work.

And so my parents were actually born in Kenya, which is like... Oh, wow. And you

were born... I was born in London.

Oh, my gosh. Yeah. They were forced out of their homes in East Africa because

there was a lot of political unrest.

And they had it super tough.

Like, brutal.

My mom's two brothers decided that they wanted to become photographers, and so

they moved to Paris and were sleeping on park benches.

And they were eating scraps, and they were basically homeless.

My uncle Max basically was discovered by Yoji Yamamoto.

I'm so confused.

Jethro, how'd you grow up?

My uncle is a great photographer.

In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue, and guess what?

Jessel's parents from Kenya, like, somehow jumped on board, and they got to

Mayflower, and they all ended up in London.

I wanted to be in fashion.

So at the age of, like, 22, I went to New York, and I had no money. I mean, I

thought I would be doing runway shows, and I was packing boxes my entire, like,

year of interning.

It was, it sucked.

It was brutal.

God, you had to unpack boxes?

So brutal.

You want to talk about brutal? I was selling bras at Sears for $6 an hour,

That was brutal.

When you said it seems like you're used to being catered to, I actually didn't

have anything growing up.

I'm not used to being catered to.

I am Indian living in, like, you know, a country that's not really mine.

That's kind of why I got upset with that comment. I think it's a British accent.

You don't feel like you're catered to by your parents at all?

100 % no.

Puppet, like when you see fingerprints, can you just clean it up? Because it

just accumulates. Every time we see something, we clean just so.

Then how come nothing looks clean?

Guys, we're going to pull the kids down. Let me take them in, please.

I'm not helping you. You're the simple life parasol.

That's a good thing.

It's hilarious.

I don't have a chihuahua.

You don't open up, you get sh**. You open up, you get sh**.

All right, guys, it's been a really long day. I need a bath. Let's go back to

this beautiful villa that I own.

Let's just go hang.

This wasn't just the right shoe choice. Thank you so much. So good.

I'm still chewing on my way out.

It's good that you didn't fly with us, because it was ghetto.

You know when TSA said, do you have anything else? No, just this whop.

I don't get it.

Do you want me to pay that?

Is that how you got it? Is that how you said to Roger?

Do you have any liquid? No, just this wop.

Wow.

Jenna,

do you know what wop is?

Yeah, wet ass pussy.

There you go.

You said white or wet?

Wet. You still don't know white?

Jenna, do you know what white people are?

Jenna, high five to that.

It's confusing.

I mean, I'm only 35. I'm the youngest one in this group, and I'm the only

confused one.

It's a weird thing to say.

I think it's disgusting and I don't like it. Wet ass pussy. How is it

disgusting? Are you saying wet ass and pussy?

No, wet ass and pussy. I get it, but it doesn't work. Wet ass pussy.

Erin just doesn't know shit about pop culture.

Erin listens to ABBA. She's not going to know what WAP is.

It's the proximity.

They're both wet.

And I don't want to be a WAP, by the way. I don't want to talk about my ass

being wet.

Coming up.

Do you want to see my boobs?

Do you want to?

Yeah. Do you want to?

Yeah. I do. I want to see your boobs. Only Jenna. Yeah.

Okay, okay.

You're awake.

Hi. What time is it?

I just need a few photos of myself.

Content creators' life never stops. I'm in a beautiful environment. Why not

capture the footage?

Your girl's got a chair.

Hello, Levi.

Are you doing your hair?

It was blue a second ago.

I can't believe I'm gone 24 hours and Levi's hair is already blue.

It's been a very chaotic morning.

You look like you have that, like, just got to bed head. Are you kidding?

This is weave.

And guess what?

I'm going back to scarf. Listen, if anyone can rock a scarf, it's you.

What a show that dinner was.

If I was Jenna, I would have thrown, like,

the beef tartare at people.

By the way, Brynn is so ridiculous.

She's like, you open up to strangers, you never open up to me about

Thanksgiving. I'm like, nobody could open up in Thanksgiving. People are

space for you. Brynn, like, spirals sometimes. I have, like, no idea what

saying sometimes.

She doesn't match things, like, the right... It's like talking about

near... Is it too much salt or too much sugar? Like, do you measure your... You

know,

I'm going to meditate for, like, five minutes.

Yeah. So I can be a better human being to you guys.

Okay, bye.

I'm going to brush my teeth.

Okay.

I'm not into any of them.

Good morning.

Hi.

Do you want to go outside?

I do.

Do you want to grab something first?

I'll just grab that. Do you want coffee?

Look at those abs.

Thank you.

You're welcome. I brought my tripod.

I got all my... Good idea. I mean, who else is going to take my photo?

How do we feel about last night?

I feel like my friend's apology was heartfelt.

Yeah, I thought that was sincere.

Yeah.

There she is. Oh, look at you.

Speak of the devil.

Yeah.

You look cute. You said nothing but good things. Just talking about last night.

Yeah. I was saying how I felt like your apology was really heartfelt, and I was

really happy that...

We moved past it. And I'm happy you guys buried the hatchet.

Yeah. Cheers, guys.

Cheers. I love this place. I never want to leave. I know, me too. I'm so happy

everybody's happy.

So happy.

Good morning. Hello, my love.

Hi. You look like a neon highlighter.

Good morning, Miss Donna. Good morning.

Is everyone feeling pumped for today?

Pumped. Hell yeah.

So what are we doing?

We're just hanging out at the beach. We're drinking.

Nice.

Have you seen these girls?

Oh, thank you so much. You're welcome. All of them look insane in a bathing

suit. I haven't worn shorts since I was, you know, in seventh grade.

Oh, hello.

Oh, finally.

This is how she makes the money, kids.

Look at that. You look like a Victoria.

How did you sleep?

I'm okay.

I got up early and meditated.

Don't be sorry.

Don't be sorry. Listen, first of all, you only threw a brick. Like, that's

Okay.

You need me to, like, bake you a cake or throw you a party. I'm your girl. Thank

you.

Do you want to?

I'll take that. Do you want to?

Yeah. No. I do. I want to see your boobs. Only Jen. Yeah. Only Jen. You've

seen her boobs. I'm dying to see your boobs. Can you just show me your boobs?

Show me just, like, a little nip. She's got a good nip, too. All you do is tease

me. I know. I do. I do. Oh, you know that. You're supposed to match the color

your lips.

I saw that.

Your nipple?

My nipples are black. Like, I don't understand.

This is not what my... That's not black.

That's not gorgeous.

Thank you. It's like a burgundy brown.

No, I'm not walking around with burgundy brown in the summer.

Who's that hair? It's probably mine.

Where? It's definitely not the stuff.

Well, mine... There's when.

It's probably the... Can you cover your mouth?

This is disgusting.

Just stop playing with your hair.

Kids, we have food.

Let's not touch hair here.

Okay, Mom.

Oh, my God.

Okay,

Diva. No, I'm touching hair.

I remember the very first time I came into the kitchen with my hairbrush, and

grandmother ripped it out of my hand and smacked me and turned me out of the

room. Wait, were you close to your grandma?

No, she was...

She was not very nice.

Oh. There was not a lot of closeness in mine.

Yeah. Do you think that you're more affectionate because you didn't really

that much affection as a child? Oh, yeah. Like, I'm a little, like,

Yeah. When it comes to my children, I smother them with love.

Yeah. And so sometimes I'm kind of like, am I doing too much?

I'm sure my son and daughter are so tired of me saying, hey, guess what? I

you. I know. It's so funny. I say it to my son all the time. So no one said it

to you when you were growing up?

talking about and my mom was very my mom loved me and that that's one thing i

would never take away from her my mother was an alcoholic for a long period of

time growing up and watching her morph into someone that i don't even know

that's hard was very hard for me i did everything to take care of her i no

matter what i kept trying and trying and trying and it just it didn't work she

wasn't my mom

It started when I was 16, I think, was like when I really saw a difference.

She would wake up and drink and she would drink all day. And she just became

this person who was no longer my mother. She wasn't the person that I grew up

with. She was just someone who was completely different.

She was always in trouble. It was like having a teenager.

Right. Because if I gave her money, she wouldn't eat, she would drink it. When

she drinks, she gets very angry.

She says things to me, and I'm like, I worked so hard not to be like you.

To just get where you are and then also overcome all that stuff. It's not like

you just did what you did, which would be enough of itself. To do that in

addition to every obstacle.

Anyway, fast forward, she died.

No. Oh, my God.

She had a heart attack in a park by herself.

Sorry.

She had a heart attack in a park by herself.

They put her in the hospital and she was on breathing tubes.

And I went to see her.

My mom loves her eyebrows.

She also has no eyebrows.

She has zero.

And she used to do this thing where she would draw the mom with black liner. So

she would look super scary.

And so I saw her and I went in and I had my whole...

suitcase and i opened it and i said you can't go out like this with no eyebrows

no and i did her eyebrows and i played salsa music and i called my family on

facetime and i said everyone needs to say goodbye because i'm taking her off

these tubes i said i want everybody to say something funny and like a good

memory of her let's not remember her and this this terrible disease that she has

it's a constant it's a constant battle it's a part of me But at the end of the

day, I also just want to remind people that my mother was not a bad person.

Now my mother's ashes are in a shopping bag in my closet.

In a shopping bag.

By the way, it's very apropos.

She's in your closet.

Just the fact that...

That's there, and she knows it's there. It's just heartbreaking.

I hope it's an Hermes bag or a Chanel bag.

You wouldn't want that to be, you know, Target or Walmart.

Have you thought about, like, where you would ever want to spread her? I mean,

you're not going to keep her in a shopping bag forever.

I was actually thinking about a way to, like, plant some tree. I was looking

into it and planting her in our house upstate. Oh, I love that.

You know, it's so funny how you see people live.

Nobody knows that's what people are dealing with. No way.

I honestly cannot imagine surviving what I have survived.

I've survived a lot, but I don't think I'll be able to.

My mom was my rock.

But you know, the beautiful thing is she's such a good mom. And I think

sometimes we are something that we didn't have.

You go through all that and you still shine through it. Oh, there's hair in

smell. Yeah. What did I say?

Let's go hang out. Let's go grab, um... Let's go grab, like, a little beach bag,

some towels. Is there towels down there? Oh, my God.

You haven't even had a drink.

Disgusting. I'm taking a drink.

I'm going to switch to, um, white wine. Do you guys have a straw?

I just need a straw. Straw?

Yeah. Are my kids alive?

Your kids are definitely alive.

Have at this villa, we have to bring the babies. I mean, well, actually, maybe

not the babies. It's a... hazard but how sick is this i mean i'm real and like

we have our own private beach holy and you have amazing wi -fi we have amazing

wi -fi and it's hot i might fly with the kids today no no please don't cut my

piece okay

All right, guys, let's go to the beach. My dad, the way he pronounces beach is

bitch. He's like, let's go to the bitch. Let's go to the bitch.

We should wait for Uba.

Oh, she's taking some rest.

What?

No, yeah, she's sleeping.

I think we should all shoot content today.

Different types of content. I'm going to do staircase.

Please don't fall, though. Yeah, this is dangerous.

Oh, wow.

Is that our little, like, beach hut?

We're the beach hut? This is...

Do you think my husband would notice if I just don't come home? I think so. Why

don't we send him little reminders?

Let's do a photo shoot, Jessel, right now. I'll send him a nipple pip. No, no,

no. I think it's a great idea. Okay, ready, Jessel? This is what you're going

do in your video.

Okay, why don't I just film you and send that to him because he'll get way more

excited.

Get in there.

Hi, ladies. Can I get you anything to drink? What are you having? A tropical?

Yeah, yeah, shot, shot.

You wore a bathing suit.

I wear a bathing suit. I just won't wear it without anything over it. If I

looked like Psy or Bran or any of them, none of this conversation would be

happening. One side I have this scar here, and then it's a little darker here

and lighter here. You get to walk one day in my skin, and then we'll talk.

Ooh, glow oil.

I want to get you a drink.

She's going to waste it. Yeah, she's going to waste it.

I tried to go literally across the street from my apartment with the kids,

I did when my parents were here. And I had to

call the nanny to come pick them up.

Do you

really? Yeah.

You do what you gotta do. You gotta do what you gotta do.

If I didn't have sex for a year and a half, I'd be in a mental institute.

That's where I'd be.

Look at you, beauty.

I took enough.

Erin, will you do it with me? Will you sun your yoni?

Like, put my vagina in the sun? Nobody's up there looking.

No. There are. Look, there's people everywhere.

I'll go like this.

You guys are actually doing a vag display?

That is so classy. It's not going to do that.

You have to pay money to do that shit. This is like the map museum right here.

There's an admission fee.

Jessel, do you know what the Sanskrit word is for yoni? No.

It's your sacred life force. It's your vagina.

So your yin energy, feminine energy, and yoni, it's your life source.

You always have this area covered.

You're supposed to let the yang, the sun's vitamin D, penetrate you.

We're here in order to let loose and have a good time. And I think if Juzzle

just kind of releases a little bit, then she'll have an even bigger release when

she's back home with Hobbit.

All right, should we do a photo shoot?

All right, guys, let's have some fun.

It wouldn't be a proper photo shoot without prop.

Oh, God. Oh, my God.

Where did you come from?

I love that you're thinking. I'm just going to take a.

And then give me the shell. Give me the shell. I cannot.

I am in love with this.

Stand up like this.

I cannot.

This is amazing.

This is amazing.

Do you want to get in?

You have to get in too.

Ready, set, go.

What is it?

No, babe. Not even happening. But you get in. You get in.

I'm coming, I'm coming. Oh, Lord. Get in.

Yes,

please. Oh, oh, wow.

Work it, work it. Jenna, do it.

Okay, okay.

I want to be a director. I'm going back to the picture -taking.

Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit where you are, sit where you are, sit, sit, sit, sit,

sit, sit. Okay, let's all fit in a trio.

Okay. Yeah, sit like that. I think they should do none of their tops on and just

holding. I mean, I'll do that.

There we go.

There we go.

Erin, just arch your back, yeah.

And then look to me, okay.

Make love to my camera.

That's amazing.

Hashtag visit Anguilla.

Let's go, babe.

Come on.

Hi,

kids. What time do you want lunch?

I mean, I feel like I'm missing out, but, you know, this is not a new

for me. This has been like this since I was a little kid, so.

There we go. Okay.

Coming up.

You know I love you, but I don't believe your story about the embryo thing. Why

would you lie about that? Why the f*** would I lie about something like that? I

don't know.

Alright guys, let's roll.

It's time to eat.

I am so hungry.

I'm starving.

After this, I'm taking 45 shots and I'm going to be wasted on the beach.

When's it in?

Anything you do, I'll do.

Okay. This is me. Okay, what do you want to do? Let's do it. Let's do it.

Oh, darling.

We're in the island, island, island life.

So we'll just order from here and then sit down. And I'm getting the entire

dessert menu.

You know what? This place is dope. So cute.

This looks empty. Shall we? Yeah, let's sit right here.

Oh, my God. This is a view. Okay, this beach is not angry like our beach.

This is gorgeous.

So cute, right? It's fine.

Oh,

I didn't get my drink.

Me neither.

I ordered orders and stuff. What do you want?

Oh, my God. Is that food for us already?

As soon as the rest of it is ready, we'll bring it over. Great. Thank you.

Wow. Friend, can we talk about your dating life?

What do you want to know?

Are you dating?

What's going on with it? Can we hook you up with someone?

Dating life is good.

I was very hardcore in the summer. I was going on like three dates a day. I was

husband hunting. How do you date three times in one day? How does that even

happen? Coffee, drinks, and dinner.

What are you looking for? I want someone who wants the family. Okay. I want to

be a mom. Okay. I love that you're steadfast in that now.

Yes, right? Yeah. I got to figure my shit out.

I'm not 27 anymore. I act like I'm not.

These eggs aren't going to scramble themselves.

No. I did fine.

You did?

Yeah. I love that. The injections, the things.

It's expensive, too. It's expensive.

The way a woman says about it, it kind of scares everybody.

It's really not. You just need a good three weeks, and you can do it. And it's

fine? And it's fine. When I went into the intake, though, they started

me. They're like, oh, you know, not just breathing aids. Embryo is the best. And

on the intake form. Can you just write down who you'd like to do embryos with?

Embryos are more viable.

Wait, what the fuck? 20 minutes in, the intake. No, they didn't do that to me.

They made me say the name of who I was. So I'm literally going through my phone,

and I'm like, yo, I've never heard that.

But the thing about that phone is that you're going to make an embryo. You're

going to figure out how you get an embryo called on the phone? I had a

many kids. Oh, but that's a weird line.

That's a weird line.

I'm a girl's girl, and I have so many girlfriends.

And I've just never heard of a location asking for you to go through your phone

contact list and hit up some guys.

to give you some jizz for an embryo. You know I love you, but I don't believe

your story about the embryo thing.

What?

I don't believe it. Why would you lie about that?

You went to a place and they said, check your phone and let's check some guys.

There's a lot of stuff I could lie about and that's not one of them.

Okay, so I'll find the next one.

Okay.

All right, all right. It's weird, I don't know. It just sounded like a crazy

story. Which is why I shared it, because it's weird, right?

Very weird. If they do that, they should be in trouble.

They educated me on the fact that it's more viable instead of money. These

people just, it's like burgdorf. You buy something, you also can like this. It

literally is. It's like an add -on. Okay, and do you want cheese on top of

Do you want sour cream? Extra guacamole? Yeah, and like as are. You say stuff

like that, and that's actually really messed up.

How does that go?

Could I lie about something like that? I don't know.

God, you're sensitive.

Yeah, let's go.

We can't ever get to one lunch or dinner or meet.

They have a very toxic relationship.

Two minutes, they're going to stop kissing. I'm kidding.

Gosh, like you're so touchy.

We just made up hours ago.

And it's like it was all that nothing, you know, because immediately you're

accusing me of lying. And again, about something serious to me.

All right, let's go.

Does that sound like a normal story?

Do you think that really happened? No, you know what I've noticed is that what

she does... She embellishes.

She thinks she catches you in something?

Yeah. Oh, yeah, she does do that. She's like, oh, but wait, what?

Can I say something?

I am sorry I used the word lie, and I feel bad about it.

Thank you.

It feels like from having so much fun in the sun in the morning to having

absolutely no...

fun at all.

There's a part of me that wants to just like grab my bags and dip.

You okay?

I'm good. I'm tired.

Yeah, I think we all are a little sleepy.

So I was just thinking, I'm still tired, and I don't want to be rude because I'm

so appreciative of everything and you hosting, but I'm going to set this one

out. I'm just tired.

Okay, you sure you're all right? Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just tired.

Okay, I get it.

At the end of the day, I would never want to make you feel horrible, and I

shouldn't have brought it up at all. Brynn, can we talk about your dating

What do you want to know?

What do you want to know?

Like, what's going on with it?

Thank you for saying that.

I think after a little me time and a really nice good night's sleep in my

bedroom that's bigger than all the rest of theirs, I'm hoping that I'm going to

wake up and feel differently.

Time out. Okay. I have to tell you, this is your only time out.

Oh, this is my only time out?

Enjoy your time wise. Okay. I love you. Sorry again about today.

Thank you, Mom. Love you.

Knock, knock, Aaron.

Hi. So I just want to talk to Cy. Before you chill out, I guess, a time out. I'm

going to take a time out. And I'm not going to go to dinner.

I just want to, like, chill and rest.

And she approved it and da -da -da. And I just wanted to make sure that you

didn't think that I was mad at you and I'm not mad at you.

I just felt so bad.

I don't feel bad.

It's okay.

I'm sensitive.

I know.

Does this look cute? It looks really bad.

Coming in here. Yeah.

Okay, listen.

I love you so much. Seeing you like this is like beyond heartbreaking.

You more than anyone. I don't know why.

I just really love you, Ben.

What do you mean? I don't mean to be joking.

I'm just being sensitive.

First of all, you are so beautiful.

And I feel like now that you've figured out what you want, you're going to get

it. Yes.

I agree.

I feel bad.

Like, clearly she's upset.

This is about her having a baby, and I get it. And I'm really happy that she

wasn't putting the blame on me. I think she realizes it was just kind of a

miscommunication. Wait, I'm sad you're not coming because, like, I selfishly

want you there.

But I'm going to be George Washington tonight.

I don't know.

You kind of look like him.

You kind of look like George.

You federalist. Here I am.

Here I am. Is there a declaration I need to sign?

Next time on The Real Half -Life of New York City.

Last night. Wait,

did you record it? Play it. Play it.

Oh,

my God.

Oh, my God.

I feel like Jethro hears your story. She hears Cy's story. And she

wants the same story. But it's like, that's not your story. And that's okay.

should be it should be queen of a thompson because you just think about

good one your story is about your parents coming from canada is that not

my no we want to know about you