All language subtitles for The.Real.Housewives.of.New.York.City.S14E09.1080p.HEVC.x265-MeGusta[eztv.re]

Previously on The Real Housewives of New
York City. I might do the egg freezing

thing. I don't know. With inflation, the
cost of eggs have just gone up.

A pint of milk as well.

We're going to Angela.

It's like abject terror for me. I'm not
going to be in a bathing suit. It's warm

on my skin. Does it still bother you
after all this time? Yeah, I know.

It's a genetic disorder. Like, most
people are like, oh, you're dirty.

Do we know when Jenna's getting here?
No. She told me she was flying down two

days early to tan because of her genetic
disorder and she feels uncomfortable.

And then she was like, the truth is, I'm
not flying down with you guys because I

don't fly coach.

Ew. Okay.

Hi.

Yeah, we're really annoyed you didn't
fly with us. If I looked like you, I

wouldn't have come. Set the cop out.

Stick to the ingredients?

Darling, it's me.

My laugh is maybe fake, but I definitely
keep it real.

I'm a true New Yorker. The only bull
I'll take is by the horn.

I always bring the flavor. It's not my
fault you don't have any fakes. In New

York, there's a lot of bad apples, but
I'm the baddest of the bunch.

I love to laugh. It'll make me mad, and
I'll date your dad.

I've been out on the ocean, searching
for something that ain't blue.

Should I? No, definitely not.

I don't have time for underwear.
Definitely do not. Guys, you ready? I

were going somewhere more fancy.

Okay, bye. We're coming, we're coming.

I'm going with my cat.

That's very Rihanna of you.

Rihanna does that?

Yeah. Whenever she leaves the
restaurant, she just walks over with the

the mug. She has a collection.

Hi, am I getting in the front again?

Like sitting in coach.

Oh,

well then you should be skilled at it.
I'm ready to eat.

I smell pot.

Is it weed or it might be like a raccoon
or something?

Yeah, it is a raccoon. Yeah.

Skunk, you mean skunk. Skunk.

Skunk. Do you guys have skunk here?

No. Oh, no. Just a lot then.

I'm excited about hitting the beach in
the morning. I know. I can't wait.

the plan tomorrow?

Beach for breakfast, and then we're
going to go out for lunch, and then

going to go out for dinner.

This is such a side vacation.

The dream vacation is...

Food, some water time, food, relax a
little bit, and then a snack, and then

just go to dinner.

This is the best vacation.

Do we have any time to, like, hang out
at the beach? Oh, we might do some

shopping, I think, after lunch.

Oh, this is so cute. It's so cute.

Guys, you ready?

Ready. I'm not starving.

Booba, how are you doing walking in the
sand with those? I literally warned

everyone. I did. She did. I listened. I
didn't listen.

Hi. Welcome to the Sunshine Shack.

This is beautiful.

The Sunshine Shack. This is awesome. You
guys have a wonderful evening. Thank

you. Why are you so far away from me?
Sit next to me. Okay. Good evening,

ladies. Good evening. Hello.

We have a special drink tonight, please.
Oh, really? What's that? It's Sunshine

Shack special.

It's SFF.

So it's passion.

I want no alcohol.

Virgin. I'll have virgin too.

So two virgin. Two virgin and four very
strong. Thank you. Four very sexy, non

-virgin, bloody.

This is very nostalgic for me. It
reminds me of back home.

I remember my mom, when she was younger,
she didn't have money to put the thing

that you put inside. So they would go to
bed early at night.

That's sweet.

You know I've never been to Africa?

I gotta take you.

Don't watch what they will show on TV.

That's not Africa.

Africa is the shit.

This place might be heaven, Africa is
paradise.

It just doesn't have a very good PR.

We need Jessel. We need Jessel to PR for
Africa.

The sand is so soft. I know, right?

Jenna,

you wore heels? No, she wore flats.
Those are really cute. That is not a

sandal. They're like studded Prada gold
situation.

You can get those in Amazon.

Except for it says Prada and not Prada.

Prada. Prada.

You are?

Who is the virgin?

Virgin? One here and one here. Okay, you
are?

Cheers. Cheers. Welcome, welcome.

Hi. Can I borrow this dress? Yes, you
can. Thank

you. We'll do a dress swap.

Yes, not wife swap.

Dress swap. Don't even.

Now, once you're ready to get a
divorce...

Just like a swamp that was a good one
Jessa. I know that we be done with the

combo Speaking of wife's wife, whatever
these five things you would you be mad

if she made that comment about David?

I Don't give it You would not give up
don't ask me that I'm a terrible person

to ask that just hyperlatic

I so much appreciate Uba right now.
Like, she's just

such a loyal friend. She fully has my
back. And she's speaking up when nobody

else did.

But seriously, I do want to truly,
genuinely apologize for saying that your

party was boring.

You weren't flirting with him? What were
you doing? Like, comedy hour?

Yes, it is. Oh, really?

Your party was not boring. It was. I
said it. Thank you. Hang on. It was

said it because I wanted to hurt you.

I was just very, very hurt because you
were accusing me of something really

disgusting. That wasn't true. I wasn't
accusing you of anything.

You can't be flirting with your husband.
I've never cheated. I've never flirted

with someone's husband.

I've never done that. I won't do that,
let alone to a friend.

I wouldn't. You know me. I wouldn't. I'm
just surprised that you're apologizing

about the party being boring, but not
about... It was a horribly mean thing to

say, and it wasn't true, and I only said
it to hurt you.

I'm so confused. I'm sorry. I'm
actually, like, very confused.

What are you confused about?

I thought that you were going to
apologize for talking about divorce and

swap and making those jokes. That was
worse.

Well, I... Okay, that was an
inappropriate, like, bad timing to make

that. So I'm sorry for that.

Thank you.

You think those are appropriate jokes to
make?

Look. Which jokes, but honey, you
weren't there. At the time, at the time,

was laughing, she was laughing, we were
all laughing. And it was all done, it

was all done in a way that, like, I
honestly didn't even think that you

upset about it. Truly. I think it's
foolish.

I think, like, if someone said that to
your husband, you would be really mad.

Like, that's not true. It depends on who
it is. You would be mad. Look, I...

Tell me what I said then. Abe was
laughing. That's not... Abe was talking

being a divorce lawyer. He was like,
well, you know I'm a divorce lawyer, so

maybe should I look into it? I didn't
think it was appropriate.

I'm allowed to have that feeling, and
why do we have to be talking about it?

I already apologized about it. And I
said thank you. Yeah. So can we all

apologize and then respond?

I don't get any sort of apologize for
being accused of something that awful.

I'm supposed to apologize to you?

He was walking up to find me to say our
vows, and that was the joke that you

decided to make. I didn't think it was
appropriate.

I'm allowed to have that feeling. I
don't get anything to apologize for

accused of something now.

I'm supposed to apologize to you?

Can we just order some food? Okay,
amazing. I'm going to have this snapper.

Why are you calling him over? We're
having a conversation.

And maybe cider rice.

If anybody wants to share.

I have to eat, okay?

Wrap it up, girl.

Do the salmon.

No, like we're trying to finish the
conversation.

Let's just finish the conversation.

I'm going to have the lobster.

Oh, Jeff caught it today.

Fresh macaw from the water. See the
beautiful water? Yeah, okay.

I'm going to have the snapper.

Fresh macaw again.

Let's just, how do we kill this?

I just, look, can I say something? I
don't think it's time. I don't think.

Let's just allow us to talk. We don't
need you to referee.

Okay, but I just want, I'm over it. It's
ridiculous. I can't get a word in. I'm

trying.

The reason I was being normal with you
today is because I know you didn't mean

it in a malicious way. Okay, thank you.
I know that. Thank you. That being said,

I just, all I'm saying is that I think I
thought it was an inappropriate place

to make those types of jokes and it hurt
my feelings.

Can we just, like, squash it and just,
like, move on?

Yeah. And I'm truly sorry.

And I was trying to do a little Larry
David bit, and it was bad timing. Whoa,

don't burn your... And by the way... I
love... I trademarked A for B.

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah.

Dumbest apology ever.

I never wanted to really hurt Erin at
her kind of boring party.

But I don't feel like she was really
flirting with Abe.

I know in my soul's soul that I didn't
flirt with Abe.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

That's messing with someone's family,
and that's, like, something I would

do. I care too much about her, and I
care too much about our friendship.

And I care way too much about Abe.

I have to stop. I can't.

All right, is there anything else that
we need to clear the air with?

Yeah, nobody say I look beautiful today.

Jenna, just why don't you guys, like,
let's just be done with it.

Who doesn't prefer business over coach?

It's not why I didn't come with you and
you don't.

I'll be back.

Do you actually believe that I didn't
come with you because I didn't want to

find coach? Like seriously, do you
actually believe that?

Seriously? You really believe that?

I do.

It was not the case at all. I think
that's like a big part of it. It really

wasn't. I don't think anything you say
while you are post -op.

from anesthesia should be held against
you. I don't think that's fair.

I just want to, like, go.

The only thing I remember from, like, my
post -op haze is there was soup

involved. But beyond that, I literally
have no idea.

Although I did fly business.

But I still get a pass for that, because
who cares?

And by the way, it was coming from,
like, a good place, and we wanted you to

part of it. Yeah, I wanted you to be a
part of it. Whether I was there on the

plane or not. That's not true.

See, maybe that's the problem.

It never would have occurred to you that
you would have cared. You exclude

yourself. You give us gifts instead of,
like, connecting.

There are gifts over there, and you get
free presents. That one's for you,

Jekyll. Oh, my goodness.

I've just been collecting all these
presents for you guys for the past two

months. By the way, I love all the
gifts. Keep giving them, please.

Because they're lovely.

But it's going to continue to be, like,
keep giving me dope shit.

But then not sharing. You tell random
strangers what your real name is and so

does your brother. And I have to hear it
from Cy.

And I've shared so much with you. And I
feel like I don't know much about you. I

don't know much about your personal
life. I mean, I feel like I got to know

a little bit better through interviewing
other people.

My name is not my real name.

So my name is Judith when I was growing
up.

I'm looking at our friend group and it
makes me feel like Jenna doesn't feel

comfortable sharing with us.

Are you dating now?

I am.

Who's the lucky lady?

How are you feeling? I know that you and
your girlfriend broke up.

Probably don't want to talk about it.

We have to change this situation.

And I totally, I can appreciate that.

But I think that if someone is
struggling, like for instance, I

across from that girl and she was
shaking so badly. And so by talking

something that happened to me, it felt a
little easier for her. I knew it would

take the focus off of her.

Well, you're saying you're talking about
a model who sits there and crying and

shaking in front of you. I've cried and
shaked in front of you. And you didn't

tell me that your real name was Judith.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait
a minute. Those two things have nothing

to do with each other. There hasn't been
an opportunity for me to be like, hey,

by the way.

Did you know my name is not Jenna? Like,
on what planet does that make sense?

The only time that my brother and sister
and I lived with my parents was the

first six months of my life.

And we lived in, like, Section 8
housing, whatever.

Just so you know, my name was Judith
when I was growing up. Oh, my God!

What? Stop! Why are you in this
conversation?

I don't know. I'm not really sure why
I'm getting called out for it. That's

the moment for me to start talking about
myself.

If you had started talking about
yourself in that moment, I would have

you. I mean, that was, like, not the
moment. I'll say that...

I did feel like you opened up a lot in
your apartment.

Everything hurts, and I can't brush my
teeth, and I feel gross. You can't?

I can brush the top, but they don't want
me to brush down the bottom. Can I,

like, see anything?

Oh, whoa.

Whoa. What is that?

So the reason I'm having all this work
done is because I don't, none of my

are in my mouth. They're my own.

I think maybe you're just a little bit
more guarded. It takes a little bit more

time. Yeah, I am guarded. I have been so
many times.

And that has nothing to do with you
guys. And, like, if that comes off as

wanting to participate or not wanting to
try or not wanting to be a friend,

like, I apologize. That's not my
intention at all.

Realest thing you said.

Yeah. Yeah. That's why we appreciate
that. And notice how we all shut the

up. And she's so nice. You okay?

Yeah.

Jenna, be careful. That fish has so much
bones. Oh, really? Yeah, really. A lot

of them.

Don't feel bad, Jenna.

I'm okay.

Are you?

I'm great.

You're not.

I'm fine.

I'm gonna cry.

Baby, don't.

I'm sorry.

It's tough. I know it's tough. It's
tough.

I know it's tough. It's tough. I just
took a bunch of bones.

Bones. There's so many.

We love you, Jenna. Yeah.

Aw. So hard.

I think this concept of, like, opening
up, it's not, like, easy for me. Like, I

grew up in a very quiet house.

My mom had really severe Asperger's,
which means there was no noise in our

house, so we weren't allowed to talk.

And she was a piano teacher, so there
was no noise at all, because we

I had the television on. I had to go to
my room and just be quiet after school.

And my mom didn't have any friends.

And so I just didn't grow up with that.
I didn't know she had Asperger's, and I

didn't really know what was going on
until I was 44.

Like, I didn't grow up with anyone
really wanting to.

And I'm not trying to paint a sad story.
I'm really not.

This is not a sad story. This is your
story.

One of the things that is a side effect
of my mother's disorder is, like,

there's zero emotion.

Zero. There is just...

When I was a kid, I didn't know anything
else.

And it helps us understand then stop and
why you do things. Because when you

don't tell us stuff, then we think, you
know, we make an ass out of assuming the

worst. I understand, but don't assume,
then just ask.

How about not assume? How about give me
the benefit of the doubt first?

Nothing is ever as it seems, ever.
There's always something underneath.

No one's bad.

People are just broken. We're all just
broken.

None of us are perfect.

Meaning, what I mean is, like,
everyone's had their shit.

I know for a fact that out of you four,
none of you had it easy. I know not as

much of your story, not because you're
hiding it, but just because I haven't,

like, heard much about the way you've
grown up. Yeah.

I don't know anything about how you grew
up. Me neither.

What's up with you? I don't know. What
can I tell you guys?

My parents are from Africa, and we came
to England as immigrants.

Really? Yeah, a lot of people actually
don't know that.

Kind of crazy because obviously I'm
Indian.

Really? But my grandfather had to move
from India to East Africa for work.

And so my parents were actually born in
Kenya, which is like... Oh, wow. And you

were born... I was born in London.

Oh, my gosh. Yeah. They were forced out
of their homes in East Africa because

there was a lot of political unrest.

And they had it super tough.

Like, brutal.

My mom's two brothers decided that they
wanted to become photographers, and so

they moved to Paris and were sleeping on
park benches.

And they were eating scraps, and they
were basically homeless.

My uncle Max basically was discovered by
Yoji Yamamoto.

I'm so confused.

Jethro, how'd you grow up?

My uncle is a great photographer.

In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue,
and guess what?

Jessel's parents from Kenya, like,
somehow jumped on board, and they got to

Mayflower, and they all ended up in
London.

I wanted to be in fashion.

So at the age of, like, 22, I went to
New York, and I had no money. I mean, I

thought I would be doing runway shows,
and I was packing boxes my entire, like,

year of interning.

It was, it sucked.

It was brutal.

God, you had to unpack boxes?

So brutal.

You want to talk about brutal? I was
selling bras at Sears for $6 an hour,

That was brutal.

When you said it seems like you're used
to being catered to, I actually didn't

have anything growing up.

I'm not used to being catered to.

I am Indian living in, like, you know, a
country that's not really mine.

That's kind of why I got upset with that
comment. I think it's a British accent.

You don't feel like you're catered to by
your parents at all?

100 % no.

Puppet, like when you see fingerprints,
can you just clean it up? Because it

just accumulates. Every time we see
something, we clean just so.

Then how come nothing looks clean?

Guys, we're going to pull the kids down.
Let me take them in, please.

I'm not helping you. You're the simple
life parasol.

That's a good thing.

It's hilarious.

I don't have a chihuahua.

You don't open up, you get sh**. You
open up, you get sh**.

All right, guys, it's been a really long
day. I need a bath. Let's go back to

this beautiful villa that I own.

Let's just go hang.

This wasn't just the right shoe choice.
Thank you so much. So good.

I'm still chewing on my way out.

It's good that you didn't fly with us,
because it was ghetto.

You know when TSA said, do you have
anything else? No, just this whop.

I don't get it.

Do you want me to pay that?

Is that how you got it? Is that how you
said to Roger?

Do you have any liquid? No, just this
wop.

Wow.

Jenna,

do you know what wop is?

Yeah, wet ass pussy.

There you go.

You said white or wet?

Wet. You still don't know white?

Jenna, do you know what white people
are?

Jenna, high five to that.

It's confusing.

I mean, I'm only 35. I'm the youngest
one in this group, and I'm the only

confused one.

It's a weird thing to say.

I think it's disgusting and I don't like
it. Wet ass pussy. How is it

disgusting? Are you saying wet ass and
pussy?

No, wet ass and pussy. I get it, but it
doesn't work. Wet ass pussy.

Erin just doesn't know shit about pop
culture.

Erin listens to ABBA. She's not going to
know what WAP is.

It's the proximity.

They're both wet.

And I don't want to be a WAP, by the
way. I don't want to talk about my ass

being wet.

Coming up.

Do you want to see my boobs?

Do you want to?

Yeah. Do you want to?

Yeah. I do. I want to see your boobs.
Only Jenna. Yeah.

Okay, okay.

You're awake.

Hi. What time is it?

I just need a few photos of myself.

Content creators' life never stops. I'm
in a beautiful environment. Why not

capture the footage?

Your girl's got a chair.

Hello, Levi.

Are you doing your hair?

It was blue a second ago.

I can't believe I'm gone 24 hours and
Levi's hair is already blue.

It's been a very chaotic morning.

You look like you have that, like, just
got to bed head. Are you kidding?

This is weave.

And guess what?

I'm going back to scarf. Listen, if
anyone can rock a scarf, it's you.

What a show that dinner was.

If I was Jenna, I would have thrown,
like,

the beef tartare at people.

By the way, Brynn is so ridiculous.

She's like, you open up to strangers,
you never open up to me about

Thanksgiving. I'm like, nobody could
open up in Thanksgiving. People are

space for you. Brynn, like, spirals
sometimes. I have, like, no idea what

saying sometimes.

She doesn't match things, like, the
right... It's like talking about

near... Is it too much salt or too much
sugar? Like, do you measure your... You

know,

I'm going to meditate for, like, five
minutes.

Yeah. So I can be a better human being
to you guys.

Okay, bye.

I'm going to brush my teeth.

Okay.

I'm not into any of them.

Good morning.

Hi.

Do you want to go outside?

I do.

Do you want to grab something first?

I'll just grab that. Do you want coffee?

Look at those abs.

Thank you.

You're welcome. I brought my tripod.

I got all my... Good idea. I mean, who
else is going to take my photo?

How do we feel about last night?

I feel like my friend's apology was
heartfelt.

Yeah, I thought that was sincere.

Yeah.

There she is. Oh, look at you.

Speak of the devil.

Yeah.

You look cute. You said nothing but good
things. Just talking about last night.

Yeah. I was saying how I felt like your
apology was really heartfelt, and I was

really happy that...

We moved past it. And I'm happy you guys
buried the hatchet.

Yeah. Cheers, guys.

Cheers. I love this place. I never want
to leave. I know, me too. I'm so happy

everybody's happy.

So happy.

Good morning. Hello, my love.

Hi. You look like a neon highlighter.

Good morning, Miss Donna. Good morning.

Is everyone feeling pumped for today?

Pumped. Hell yeah.

So what are we doing?

We're just hanging out at the beach.
We're drinking.

Nice.

Have you seen these girls?

Oh, thank you so much. You're welcome.
All of them look insane in a bathing

suit. I haven't worn shorts since I was,
you know, in seventh grade.

Oh, hello.

Oh, finally.

This is how she makes the money, kids.

Look at that. You look like a Victoria.

How did you sleep?

I'm okay.

I got up early and meditated.

Don't be sorry.

Don't be sorry. Listen, first of all,
you only threw a brick. Like, that's

Okay.

You need me to, like, bake you a cake or
throw you a party. I'm your girl. Thank

you.

Do you want to?

I'll take that. Do you want to?

Yeah. No. I do. I want to see your
boobs. Only Jen. Yeah. Only Jen. You've

seen her boobs. I'm dying to see your
boobs. Can you just show me your boobs?

Show me just, like, a little nip. She's
got a good nip, too. All you do is tease

me. I know. I do. I do. Oh, you know
that. You're supposed to match the color

your lips.

I saw that.

Your nipple?

My nipples are black. Like, I don't
understand.

This is not what my... That's not black.

That's not gorgeous.

Thank you. It's like a burgundy brown.

No, I'm not walking around with burgundy
brown in the summer.

Who's that hair? It's probably mine.

Where? It's definitely not the stuff.

Well, mine... There's when.

It's probably the... Can you cover your
mouth?

This is disgusting.

Just stop playing with your hair.

Kids, we have food.

Let's not touch hair here.

Okay, Mom.

Oh, my God.

Okay,

Diva. No, I'm touching hair.

I remember the very first time I came
into the kitchen with my hairbrush, and

grandmother ripped it out of my hand and
smacked me and turned me out of the

room. Wait, were you close to your
grandma?

No, she was...

She was not very nice.

Oh. There was not a lot of closeness in
mine.

Yeah. Do you think that you're more
affectionate because you didn't really

that much affection as a child? Oh,
yeah. Like, I'm a little, like,

Yeah. When it comes to my children, I
smother them with love.

Yeah. And so sometimes I'm kind of like,
am I doing too much?

I'm sure my son and daughter are so
tired of me saying, hey, guess what? I

you. I know. It's so funny. I say it to
my son all the time. So no one said it

to you when you were growing up?

talking about and my mom was very my mom
loved me and that that's one thing i

would never take away from her my mother
was an alcoholic for a long period of

time growing up and watching her morph
into someone that i don't even know

that's hard was very hard for me i did
everything to take care of her i no

matter what i kept trying and trying and
trying and it just it didn't work she

wasn't my mom

It started when I was 16, I think, was
like when I really saw a difference.

She would wake up and drink and she
would drink all day. And she just became

this person who was no longer my mother.
She wasn't the person that I grew up

with. She was just someone who was
completely different.

She was always in trouble. It was like
having a teenager.

Right. Because if I gave her money, she
wouldn't eat, she would drink it. When

she drinks, she gets very angry.

She says things to me, and I'm like, I
worked so hard not to be like you.

To just get where you are and then also
overcome all that stuff. It's not like

you just did what you did, which would
be enough of itself. To do that in

addition to every obstacle.

Anyway, fast forward, she died.

No. Oh, my God.

She had a heart attack in a park by
herself.

Sorry.

She had a heart attack in a park by
herself.

They put her in the hospital and she was
on breathing tubes.

And I went to see her.

My mom loves her eyebrows.

She also has no eyebrows.

She has zero.

And she used to do this thing where she
would draw the mom with black liner. So

she would look super scary.

And so I saw her and I went in and I had
my whole...

suitcase and i opened it and i said you
can't go out like this with no eyebrows

no and i did her eyebrows and i played
salsa music and i called my family on

facetime and i said everyone needs to
say goodbye because i'm taking her off

these tubes i said i want everybody to
say something funny and like a good

memory of her let's not remember her and
this this terrible disease that she has

it's a constant it's a constant battle
it's a part of me But at the end of the

day, I also just want to remind people
that my mother was not a bad person.

Now my mother's ashes are in a shopping
bag in my closet.

In a shopping bag.

By the way, it's very apropos.

She's in your closet.

Just the fact that...

That's there, and she knows it's there.
It's just heartbreaking.

I hope it's an Hermes bag or a Chanel
bag.

You wouldn't want that to be, you know,
Target or Walmart.

Have you thought about, like, where you
would ever want to spread her? I mean,

you're not going to keep her in a
shopping bag forever.

I was actually thinking about a way to,
like, plant some tree. I was looking

into it and planting her in our house
upstate. Oh, I love that.

You know, it's so funny how you see
people live.

Nobody knows that's what people are
dealing with. No way.

I honestly cannot imagine surviving what
I have survived.

I've survived a lot, but I don't think
I'll be able to.

My mom was my rock.

But you know, the beautiful thing is
she's such a good mom. And I think

sometimes we are something that we
didn't have.

You go through all that and you still
shine through it. Oh, there's hair in

smell. Yeah. What did I say?

Let's go hang out. Let's go grab, um...
Let's go grab, like, a little beach bag,

some towels. Is there towels down there?
Oh, my God.

You haven't even had a drink.

Disgusting. I'm taking a drink.

I'm going to switch to, um, white wine.
Do you guys have a straw?

I just need a straw. Straw?

Yeah. Are my kids alive?

Your kids are definitely alive.

Have at this villa, we have to bring the
babies. I mean, well, actually, maybe

not the babies. It's a... hazard but how
sick is this i mean i'm real and like

we have our own private beach holy and
you have amazing wi -fi we have amazing

wi -fi and it's hot i might fly with the
kids today no no please don't cut my

piece okay

All right, guys, let's go to the beach.
My dad, the way he pronounces beach is

bitch. He's like, let's go to the bitch.
Let's go to the bitch.

We should wait for Uba.

Oh, she's taking some rest.

What?

No, yeah, she's sleeping.

I think we should all shoot content
today.

Different types of content. I'm going to
do staircase.

Please don't fall, though. Yeah, this is
dangerous.

Oh, wow.

Is that our little, like, beach hut?

We're the beach hut? This is...

Do you think my husband would notice if
I just don't come home? I think so. Why

don't we send him little reminders?

Let's do a photo shoot, Jessel, right
now. I'll send him a nipple pip. No, no,

no. I think it's a great idea. Okay,
ready, Jessel? This is what you're going

do in your video.

Okay, why don't I just film you and send
that to him because he'll get way more

excited.

Get in there.

Hi, ladies. Can I get you anything to
drink? What are you having? A tropical?

Yeah, yeah, shot, shot.

You wore a bathing suit.

I wear a bathing suit. I just won't wear
it without anything over it. If I

looked like Psy or Bran or any of them,
none of this conversation would be

happening. One side I have this scar
here, and then it's a little darker here

and lighter here. You get to walk one
day in my skin, and then we'll talk.

Ooh, glow oil.

I want to get you a drink.

She's going to waste it. Yeah, she's
going to waste it.

I tried to go literally across the
street from my apartment with the kids,

I did when my parents were here. And I
had to

call the nanny to come pick them up.

Do you

really? Yeah.

You do what you gotta do. You gotta do
what you gotta do.

If I didn't have sex for a year and a
half, I'd be in a mental institute.

That's where I'd be.

Look at you, beauty.

I took enough.

Erin, will you do it with me? Will you
sun your yoni?

Like, put my vagina in the sun? Nobody's
up there looking.

No. There are. Look, there's people
everywhere.

I'll go like this.

You guys are actually doing a vag
display?

That is so classy. It's not going to do
that.

You have to pay money to do that shit.
This is like the map museum right here.

There's an admission fee.

Jessel, do you know what the Sanskrit
word is for yoni? No.

It's your sacred life force. It's your
vagina.

So your yin energy, feminine energy, and
yoni, it's your life source.

You always have this area covered.

You're supposed to let the yang, the
sun's vitamin D, penetrate you.

We're here in order to let loose and
have a good time. And I think if Juzzle

just kind of releases a little bit, then
she'll have an even bigger release when

she's back home with Hobbit.

All right, should we do a photo shoot?

All right, guys, let's have some fun.

It wouldn't be a proper photo shoot
without prop.

Oh, God. Oh, my God.

Where did you come from?

I love that you're thinking. I'm just
going to take a.

And then give me the shell. Give me the
shell. I cannot.

I am in love with this.

Stand up like this.

I cannot.

This is amazing.

This is amazing.

Do you want to get in?

You have to get in too.

Ready, set, go.

What is it?

No, babe. Not even happening. But you
get in. You get in.

I'm coming, I'm coming. Oh, Lord. Get
in.

Yes,

please. Oh, oh, wow.

Work it, work it. Jenna, do it.

Okay, okay.

I want to be a director. I'm going back
to the picture -taking.

Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit where you are,
sit where you are, sit, sit, sit, sit,

sit, sit. Okay, let's all fit in a trio.

Okay. Yeah, sit like that. I think they
should do none of their tops on and just

holding. I mean, I'll do that.

There we go.

There we go.

Erin, just arch your back, yeah.

And then look to me, okay.

Make love to my camera.

That's amazing.

Hashtag visit Anguilla.

Let's go, babe.

Come on.

Hi,

kids. What time do you want lunch?

I mean, I feel like I'm missing out,
but, you know, this is not a new

for me. This has been like this since I
was a little kid, so.

There we go. Okay.

Coming up.

You know I love you, but I don't believe
your story about the embryo thing. Why

would you lie about that? Why the f***
would I lie about something like that? I

don't know.

Alright guys, let's roll.

It's time to eat.

I am so hungry.

I'm starving.

After this, I'm taking 45 shots and I'm
going to be wasted on the beach.

When's it in?

Anything you do, I'll do.

Okay. This is me. Okay, what do you want
to do? Let's do it. Let's do it.

Oh, darling.

We're in the island, island, island
life.

So we'll just order from here and then
sit down. And I'm getting the entire

dessert menu.

You know what? This place is dope. So
cute.

This looks empty. Shall we? Yeah, let's
sit right here.

Oh, my God. This is a view. Okay, this
beach is not angry like our beach.

This is gorgeous.

So cute, right? It's fine.

Oh,

I didn't get my drink.

Me neither.

I ordered orders and stuff. What do you
want?

Oh, my God. Is that food for us already?

As soon as the rest of it is ready,
we'll bring it over. Great. Thank you.

Wow. Friend, can we talk about your
dating life?

What do you want to know?

Are you dating?

What's going on with it? Can we hook you
up with someone?

Dating life is good.

I was very hardcore in the summer. I was
going on like three dates a day. I was

husband hunting. How do you date three
times in one day? How does that even

happen? Coffee, drinks, and dinner.

What are you looking for? I want someone
who wants the family. Okay. I want to

be a mom. Okay. I love that you're
steadfast in that now.

Yes, right? Yeah. I got to figure my
shit out.

I'm not 27 anymore. I act like I'm not.

These eggs aren't going to scramble
themselves.

No. I did fine.

You did?

Yeah. I love that. The injections, the
things.

It's expensive, too. It's expensive.

The way a woman says about it, it kind
of scares everybody.

It's really not. You just need a good
three weeks, and you can do it. And it's

fine? And it's fine. When I went into
the intake, though, they started

me. They're like, oh, you know, not just
breathing aids. Embryo is the best. And

on the intake form. Can you just write
down who you'd like to do embryos with?

Embryos are more viable.

Wait, what the fuck? 20 minutes in, the
intake. No, they didn't do that to me.

They made me say the name of who I was.
So I'm literally going through my phone,

and I'm like, yo, I've never heard that.

But the thing about that phone is that
you're going to make an embryo. You're

going to figure out how you get an
embryo called on the phone? I had a

many kids. Oh, but that's a weird line.

That's a weird line.

I'm a girl's girl, and I have so many
girlfriends.

And I've just never heard of a location
asking for you to go through your phone

contact list and hit up some guys.

to give you some jizz for an embryo. You
know I love you, but I don't believe

your story about the embryo thing.

What?

I don't believe it. Why would you lie
about that?

You went to a place and they said, check
your phone and let's check some guys.

There's a lot of stuff I could lie about
and that's not one of them.

Okay, so I'll find the next one.

Okay.

All right, all right. It's weird, I
don't know. It just sounded like a crazy

story. Which is why I shared it, because
it's weird, right?

Very weird. If they do that, they should
be in trouble.

They educated me on the fact that it's
more viable instead of money. These

people just, it's like burgdorf. You buy
something, you also can like this. It

literally is. It's like an add -on.
Okay, and do you want cheese on top of

Do you want sour cream? Extra guacamole?
Yeah, and like as are. You say stuff

like that, and that's actually really
messed up.

How does that go?

Could I lie about something like that? I
don't know.

God, you're sensitive.

Yeah, let's go.

We can't ever get to one lunch or dinner
or meet.

They have a very toxic relationship.

Two minutes, they're going to stop
kissing. I'm kidding.

Gosh, like you're so touchy.

We just made up hours ago.

And it's like it was all that nothing,
you know, because immediately you're

accusing me of lying. And again, about
something serious to me.

All right, let's go.

Does that sound like a normal story?

Do you think that really happened? No,
you know what I've noticed is that what

she does... She embellishes.

She thinks she catches you in something?

Yeah. Oh, yeah, she does do that. She's
like, oh, but wait, what?

Can I say something?

I am sorry I used the word lie, and I
feel bad about it.

Thank you.

It feels like from having so much fun in
the sun in the morning to having

absolutely no...

fun at all.

There's a part of me that wants to just
like grab my bags and dip.

You okay?

I'm good. I'm tired.

Yeah, I think we all are a little
sleepy.

So I was just thinking, I'm still tired,
and I don't want to be rude because I'm

so appreciative of everything and you
hosting, but I'm going to set this one

out. I'm just tired.

Okay, you sure you're all right? Yeah,
I'm fine. I'm just tired.

Okay, I get it.

At the end of the day, I would never
want to make you feel horrible, and I

shouldn't have brought it up at all.
Brynn, can we talk about your dating

What do you want to know?

What do you want to know?

Like, what's going on with it?

Thank you for saying that.

I think after a little me time and a
really nice good night's sleep in my

bedroom that's bigger than all the rest
of theirs, I'm hoping that I'm going to

wake up and feel differently.

Time out. Okay. I have to tell you, this
is your only time out.

Oh, this is my only time out?

Enjoy your time wise. Okay. I love you.
Sorry again about today.

Thank you, Mom. Love you.

Knock, knock, Aaron.

Hi. So I just want to talk to Cy. Before
you chill out, I guess, a time out. I'm

going to take a time out. And I'm not
going to go to dinner.

I just want to, like, chill and rest.

And she approved it and da -da -da. And
I just wanted to make sure that you

didn't think that I was mad at you and
I'm not mad at you.

I just felt so bad.

I don't feel bad.

It's okay.

I'm sensitive.

I know.

Does this look cute? It looks really
bad.

Coming in here. Yeah.

Okay, listen.

I love you so much. Seeing you like this
is like beyond heartbreaking.

You more than anyone. I don't know why.

I just really love you, Ben.

What do you mean? I don't mean to be
joking.

I'm just being sensitive.

First of all, you are so beautiful.

And I feel like now that you've figured
out what you want, you're going to get

it. Yes.

I agree.

I feel bad.

Like, clearly she's upset.

This is about her having a baby, and I
get it. And I'm really happy that she

wasn't putting the blame on me. I think
she realizes it was just kind of a

miscommunication. Wait, I'm sad you're
not coming because, like, I selfishly

want you there.

But I'm going to be George Washington
tonight.

I don't know.

You kind of look like him.

You kind of look like George.

You federalist. Here I am.

Here I am. Is there a declaration I need
to sign?

Next time on The Real Half -Life of New
York City.

Last night. Wait,

did you record it? Play it. Play it.

Oh,

my God.

Oh, my God.

I feel like Jethro hears your story. She
hears Cy's story. And she

wants the same story. But it's like,
that's not your story. And that's okay.

should be it should be queen of a
thompson because you just think about

good one your story is about your
parents coming from canada is that not

my no we want to know about you