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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,773 --> 00:00:09,410 Oh, those are beautiful pastries. 2 00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:11,179 Yeah, right? I got them from this amazing bakery 3 00:00:11,312 --> 00:00:12,680 on Abbot Kinney. 4 00:00:12,780 --> 00:00:15,683 I thought this was a cream puff, but it's got meat in it. 5 00:00:15,783 --> 00:00:19,187 You know how you get your mouth all ready for something sweet, 6 00:00:19,320 --> 00:00:21,555 and suddenly there's ham? 7 00:00:22,790 --> 00:00:26,094 I don't like mouth surprises. 8 00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:28,462 (wood creaking) 9 00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:31,232 Malcolm, is that your floor making that sound? 10 00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:33,367 Uh, yeah, mine's got a few quirks. 11 00:00:33,467 --> 00:00:35,403 (wood creaking) 12 00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:40,641 Son, your floor shouldn't be mushy. 13 00:00:40,741 --> 00:00:43,811 It's fine. It's just a old house, Pop. 14 00:00:43,911 --> 00:00:44,912 Whoa, Marty, no! 15 00:00:45,045 --> 00:00:47,047 What? What? 16 00:00:47,148 --> 00:00:49,183 You cannot go near the fireplace. 17 00:00:49,250 --> 00:00:50,218 What's wrong? 18 00:00:50,318 --> 00:00:51,752 There's a gap in the floor 19 00:00:51,852 --> 00:00:53,087 right where you're standing. 20 00:00:53,187 --> 00:00:55,489 -A gap? -It's a small gap. 21 00:00:55,556 --> 00:00:57,625 -But do not move. -What... 22 00:00:57,725 --> 00:00:58,992 Look, I had to put a rug over it 23 00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:00,594 'cause I didn't want Mama to see it. 24 00:01:00,694 --> 00:01:03,697 So you rather your mother watch her son fall to his death? 25 00:01:03,764 --> 00:01:04,897 CALVIN: Okay, babe, 26 00:01:04,998 --> 00:01:07,168 it's one foot down and just sand. 27 00:01:07,235 --> 00:01:08,536 Yeah. (laughs) 28 00:01:08,636 --> 00:01:10,604 Well, it's not just sand. (clears throat) 29 00:01:10,704 --> 00:01:12,306 it's a family of crabs under there. 30 00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:13,574 Crabs?! 31 00:01:13,707 --> 00:01:15,676 -Daddy, please... -You-you gonna be okay, son. 32 00:01:15,776 --> 00:01:17,111 You gonna be all right. 33 00:01:17,211 --> 00:01:18,679 -You can do this. -Mar-Marty, look at me, okay? 34 00:01:18,779 --> 00:01:20,348 Step towards the plant. 35 00:01:20,414 --> 00:01:21,782 -Come on. -(wood creaks) 36 00:01:21,882 --> 00:01:23,917 Step to the edge of the rug. 37 00:01:24,718 --> 00:01:26,086 Okay, now jump. 38 00:01:26,187 --> 00:01:28,055 There you go. See? Yay. 39 00:01:28,122 --> 00:01:31,091 Get off me. Get off me. 40 00:01:31,225 --> 00:01:33,461 See? Look, we all good. 41 00:01:33,561 --> 00:01:35,363 We are not all good. 42 00:01:35,463 --> 00:01:37,064 When people come to visit, they shouldn't have to 43 00:01:37,131 --> 00:01:40,701 be a American Ninja Warrior to go to the bathroom. 44 00:01:41,869 --> 00:01:43,571 You know what? You need new floors. 45 00:01:43,670 --> 00:01:46,140 Oh, no, no, I can't afford new floors right now. 46 00:01:46,274 --> 00:01:47,875 Well, can you afford a lawsuit? 47 00:01:47,975 --> 00:01:50,178 Oh, please, Marty is not gonna sue me. 48 00:01:50,277 --> 00:01:51,845 -I would sue you so fast! -TINA: See? 49 00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:54,348 Uh, uh, no-nobody's suing nobody. 50 00:01:54,448 --> 00:01:56,550 Listen. 51 00:01:56,650 --> 00:01:57,884 We'll get you new floors. 52 00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:59,620 It'll-it'll be our housewarming gift. 53 00:01:59,753 --> 00:02:01,822 -Yeah. -Whoa, no, no, look, look. Thanks, y'all. 54 00:02:01,922 --> 00:02:03,591 But-but new floors? That's a fortune. 55 00:02:03,691 --> 00:02:05,058 Eh, not necessarily. 56 00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:07,060 You know what? I'm gonna call my cousin Crutch. 57 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:09,562 Oh, Crutch? That's the one who always has 58 00:02:09,663 --> 00:02:11,165 his shirt off in the Christmas cards? 59 00:02:12,266 --> 00:02:14,835 Yeah, I don't even open the envelope anymore. 60 00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:17,805 We haven't seen Crutch in years. 61 00:02:17,938 --> 00:02:19,607 Look, the point is is that he owns 62 00:02:19,673 --> 00:02:21,475 a flooring company in New York. 63 00:02:21,575 --> 00:02:25,279 I'm sure he can get us the materials wholesale. 64 00:02:25,379 --> 00:02:26,514 -Oh. -Okay. 65 00:02:26,647 --> 00:02:27,948 I'll just call him right here. 66 00:02:28,015 --> 00:02:29,049 (FaceTime rings) 67 00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:31,018 CRUTCH: What up, cuz? 68 00:02:31,118 --> 00:02:33,721 Okay, C-Crutch, could-could you put a shirt on, please? 69 00:02:35,055 --> 00:02:37,057 You called me during my naked time. 70 00:02:37,156 --> 00:02:39,927 Eh... Oh... Okay, Crutch, listen. 71 00:02:40,027 --> 00:02:43,564 Hey, my son Malcolm just bought a house, and, uh, 72 00:02:43,664 --> 00:02:45,199 he needs new floors, so... 73 00:02:45,333 --> 00:02:47,268 we thought maybe you could hook us up. 74 00:02:47,335 --> 00:02:49,637 Of course, cuzzo. I got you. 75 00:02:49,737 --> 00:02:51,272 Well, all right. 76 00:02:51,339 --> 00:02:53,441 I can't believe Malcolm is old enough to buy a house. 77 00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:56,777 It feels just like yesterday you was wearing pull-ups 78 00:02:56,877 --> 00:02:58,879 and eating glue. 79 00:03:00,514 --> 00:03:01,915 Y'all let me eat glue? 80 00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:05,185 Me? No. Your father let Crutch watch you. 81 00:03:05,286 --> 00:03:07,355 You kept trying to open up your little mouth. 82 00:03:07,455 --> 00:03:08,556 It was adorable. 83 00:03:08,656 --> 00:03:10,524 CALVIN (laughs): Okay, well, 84 00:03:10,624 --> 00:03:12,860 a-all right, all right, cuz, thank you so much, man. 85 00:03:12,960 --> 00:03:14,962 We appreciate the help, though. Thank you. 86 00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:17,231 Look, don't mention it. As soon as I place the order, 87 00:03:17,365 --> 00:03:18,466 I'll get on a plane. 88 00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:20,133 CALVIN: A plane? 89 00:03:20,234 --> 00:03:22,169 What-- Why-why you getting on a plane? 90 00:03:22,270 --> 00:03:23,837 It's a long drive from New York. 91 00:03:23,904 --> 00:03:25,539 You know I got banned from Amtrak. 92 00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:28,542 They don't joke around with them quiet cars. 93 00:03:28,642 --> 00:03:30,511 (Calvin laughs, stammers) 94 00:03:30,611 --> 00:03:31,912 You know, uh, Crutch, there's no need 95 00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:33,381 for you to travel all the way out here. 96 00:03:33,481 --> 00:03:35,082 We just, you know, we thought you could just 97 00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:36,617 kind of help us with the materials. 98 00:03:36,716 --> 00:03:38,319 -That's... -Hold on for a minute. 99 00:03:38,386 --> 00:03:41,655 You want the Crutch discount without the Crutch? 100 00:03:41,722 --> 00:03:43,190 No. No, no, man, we want the Crutch. 101 00:03:43,291 --> 00:03:45,526 You know we want the Crutch. We love the Crutch. 102 00:03:45,593 --> 00:03:47,461 MALCOLM: Yeah, we want the Crutch. Hey, hey, hey. 103 00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:48,996 Hey, hey, thank you, Cousin Crutch. 104 00:03:49,096 --> 00:03:51,432 No problem, Sticky Lips. 105 00:03:53,634 --> 00:03:55,636 * Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood * 106 00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:57,305 * Welcome to the hood. * 107 00:04:04,978 --> 00:04:06,714 Hey! Sorry I'm late. I'll get dinner started. 108 00:04:06,814 --> 00:04:08,449 Already taken care of. 109 00:04:09,383 --> 00:04:10,217 Wow! 110 00:04:10,318 --> 00:04:11,819 I'm sorry you lost your job, 111 00:04:11,885 --> 00:04:13,887 but coming home to a home-cooked meal is pretty great. 112 00:04:14,021 --> 00:04:15,623 I love having all this free time. 113 00:04:15,723 --> 00:04:17,224 You know, just today 114 00:04:17,325 --> 00:04:19,393 I uploaded all of Grover's baby photos onto the cloud, 115 00:04:19,493 --> 00:04:24,898 I marked all 761 of your unread emails as read, 116 00:04:24,998 --> 00:04:27,000 and I finally canceled that gym membership 117 00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:28,569 we still had in Michigan. 118 00:04:28,669 --> 00:04:31,071 Huh. How can I repay you? 119 00:04:31,171 --> 00:04:33,040 I can think of a few ways. 120 00:04:33,106 --> 00:04:33,941 Mmm. 121 00:04:34,074 --> 00:04:35,308 Can you not? 122 00:04:35,409 --> 00:04:37,811 -Why do you hate love? -We barely touched! 123 00:04:37,911 --> 00:04:39,947 I-I'm sorry. I'm just wiped out. 124 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:41,415 It feels like I've been silk-screening T-shirts 125 00:04:41,549 --> 00:04:43,451 -for hours. -Ooh, let me see that. 126 00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:45,953 What have we got here? 127 00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:49,823 "Capy time, vibing hard"? 128 00:04:50,824 --> 00:04:52,025 Did you mean for it to say that? 129 00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:53,794 Okay, boomer. 130 00:04:54,995 --> 00:04:56,930 'Scuse me. I-I am not a boomer. 131 00:04:57,064 --> 00:04:58,732 Tom Brokaw is a boomer. 132 00:04:58,832 --> 00:05:00,368 I don't know your friends, Dad. 133 00:05:00,434 --> 00:05:02,035 (sputters) 134 00:05:02,770 --> 00:05:05,506 I guess we're just confused about this shirt. 135 00:05:05,606 --> 00:05:07,040 Well, you're the only one, 136 00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:08,776 because everybody in my class loves them. 137 00:05:08,909 --> 00:05:10,210 I've already sold a bunch. 138 00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:11,445 Oh. 139 00:05:11,545 --> 00:05:12,980 Looks like we have a budding entrepreneur 140 00:05:13,113 --> 00:05:14,281 -in our house. -Mm. 141 00:05:14,382 --> 00:05:15,983 Yeah. I-I just don't know how I'm gonna get 142 00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:18,586 all these T-shirts made and my homework done. 143 00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:20,087 You're in luck, buddy. 144 00:05:20,187 --> 00:05:21,154 I have all this time. 145 00:05:21,288 --> 00:05:23,424 Please, take advantage. Use me. 146 00:05:23,524 --> 00:05:24,925 -R-Really? -Yeah. 147 00:05:25,025 --> 00:05:26,394 That'd be great, Dad. 148 00:05:26,494 --> 00:05:27,961 But, uh, at your age, 149 00:05:28,061 --> 00:05:29,162 are you sure you have the energy? 150 00:05:29,262 --> 00:05:30,831 -At my age? -GEMMA: Uh... 151 00:05:30,931 --> 00:05:34,267 I have got to teach you how to quit while you're ahead. 152 00:05:36,804 --> 00:05:38,506 Morning, babe. I don't know what you're doing, 153 00:05:38,606 --> 00:05:41,308 but this turkey bacon smells like real bacon. 154 00:05:41,409 --> 00:05:43,176 Oh. Yeah, you're smelling my bacon, 155 00:05:43,276 --> 00:05:45,345 because my cholesterol is great. 156 00:05:46,414 --> 00:05:47,681 Oh. 157 00:05:47,781 --> 00:05:49,717 Well, can I rub my bacon on your bacon? 158 00:05:49,817 --> 00:05:51,685 -Ew. -(knocking) 159 00:05:51,784 --> 00:05:54,622 -Don't be nasty. -Ain't nobody being nasty. I'm talking about bacon. 160 00:05:54,688 --> 00:05:56,123 -You're being nasty, you know you are. -You-- No, you were being-- 161 00:05:56,223 --> 00:05:57,825 Hey, I'm talking about breakfast, girl. 162 00:05:57,925 --> 00:06:00,227 -I wasn't even trying to do nothing. -(chuckling) 163 00:06:01,795 --> 00:06:04,164 -Hey! -Cuz! 164 00:06:06,233 --> 00:06:08,702 Crutch, man! Wh-What are you doing here? 165 00:06:08,836 --> 00:06:11,038 I told you I was coming. 166 00:06:11,138 --> 00:06:12,540 Yeah, but, uh, you know, I thought you'd tell me 167 00:06:12,673 --> 00:06:13,907 when you were coming. 168 00:06:14,007 --> 00:06:15,543 You know you didn't have to drop everything. 169 00:06:15,676 --> 00:06:16,777 Drop what? 170 00:06:16,844 --> 00:06:18,345 My wife Jeanette been gone five years, 171 00:06:18,446 --> 00:06:19,447 God rest her soul. 172 00:06:19,513 --> 00:06:20,981 Kids are out of the house. 173 00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:22,683 I'm all yours. 174 00:06:22,783 --> 00:06:24,284 -Well... -Oh, there she is! 175 00:06:24,351 --> 00:06:26,520 -Bring it in, sis! Whoo! -Hey! How you doing? 176 00:06:26,620 --> 00:06:28,355 Ooh, you smell like bacon. 177 00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:30,190 -Oh. -Oh, it ain't you. 178 00:06:30,290 --> 00:06:31,324 There is bacon. 179 00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,593 Oh. 180 00:06:33,360 --> 00:06:34,995 I'm starving. Do you mind? 181 00:06:35,095 --> 00:06:36,930 No, no, go ahead. Help yourself. 182 00:06:37,030 --> 00:06:38,331 -Mmm. -You already have it 183 00:06:38,432 --> 00:06:40,734 in your unwashed airplane hands anyway. 184 00:06:41,635 --> 00:06:43,236 Hmm. 185 00:06:43,370 --> 00:06:44,938 You know, every time I see him, 186 00:06:45,038 --> 00:06:46,373 I can't help but think about 187 00:06:46,474 --> 00:06:47,975 how much he looks like your brother Curtis. 188 00:06:48,041 --> 00:06:49,042 Really? 189 00:06:49,176 --> 00:06:50,043 Yeah. 190 00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:51,579 I don't see it. 191 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:55,315 These bacons is good. 192 00:06:55,382 --> 00:06:58,251 I can't wait to soak up some of this L.A. sun, 193 00:06:58,385 --> 00:06:59,620 meet some celebrities. 194 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:01,188 Oh, before I forget, 195 00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:03,857 here's the receipt to my airplane ticket. 196 00:07:04,825 --> 00:07:06,827 Oh, I'm-I'm paying for your flight? 197 00:07:06,894 --> 00:07:09,563 Yeah, I'm supposed to pay to come fix your floors? 198 00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:12,833 Crutch, this is a lot. 199 00:07:12,900 --> 00:07:14,167 Well, it's a business trip. 200 00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:15,836 That's why I flew business class. 201 00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:17,170 It's in the name. 202 00:07:18,706 --> 00:07:19,773 Where's the commode? 203 00:07:19,907 --> 00:07:20,774 -That way. -Yeah. 204 00:07:20,908 --> 00:07:22,610 -Right here? -Yeah. 205 00:07:24,311 --> 00:07:26,647 -Really, Calvin? Really? -I know, I know. 206 00:07:26,747 --> 00:07:28,415 I know, I know, babe. But, you know, 207 00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:31,218 just think about all the money we'll save on Malcolm's floors. 208 00:07:31,318 --> 00:07:32,553 -Mm. -And just think about it-- 209 00:07:32,653 --> 00:07:34,488 I get to hang out with my favorite cousin. 210 00:07:34,588 --> 00:07:36,256 You know, back in New York, man, 211 00:07:36,389 --> 00:07:39,292 we would spend summers there. It'd be such a good time. 212 00:07:39,392 --> 00:07:41,795 And I remember he was just a-- And it was a... 213 00:07:42,596 --> 00:07:43,797 (knocking) 214 00:07:44,598 --> 00:07:45,899 -Ooh, good morning! -TINA: Oh. 215 00:07:45,966 --> 00:07:47,668 Tina, I'm bringing back your Crock-Pot. 216 00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:50,938 Just another way I'm using my free time to help Gemma. 217 00:07:51,038 --> 00:07:52,105 Oh. Well... 218 00:07:52,205 --> 00:07:53,440 Ooh. Are your hands blue? 219 00:07:53,541 --> 00:07:54,908 Oh, yeah. 220 00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:57,409 I'm also helping Grover silk-screen some T-shirts. 221 00:07:58,211 --> 00:08:01,181 Oh, man. Them little soaps are whimsical. 222 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:04,718 Uh, Crutch, this is my good friend Dave. 223 00:08:04,785 --> 00:08:08,321 Oh, this man right here needs no introduction. 224 00:08:09,122 --> 00:08:10,924 Calvin, have you been talking me up? 225 00:08:10,991 --> 00:08:12,826 David Schwimmer. 226 00:08:13,961 --> 00:08:15,162 What? 227 00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:17,598 Why didn't you tell me you was friends 228 00:08:17,698 --> 00:08:18,732 with a Friend? 229 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:20,601 Oh, no. Sir, no, no, no, no, no. 230 00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:21,835 That's not-- It's not-- 231 00:08:21,969 --> 00:08:23,303 -I'm not-- -Da-David. -Dave. 232 00:08:23,436 --> 00:08:24,471 -Don't bother. -Just go with it. It's better. 233 00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:29,610 See how these boards are all warped? 234 00:08:29,677 --> 00:08:31,912 -Yeah. -That's from salt air. 235 00:08:32,011 --> 00:08:35,282 Your house is too close to the big ocean. 236 00:08:36,950 --> 00:08:38,586 Well, Crutch, it's a beach house. 237 00:08:38,686 --> 00:08:40,419 That's actually considered a positive. 238 00:08:40,486 --> 00:08:41,621 Go figure. 239 00:08:41,722 --> 00:08:42,890 California. 240 00:08:44,491 --> 00:08:48,095 Anyway, I ordered you some oak wood flooring. 241 00:08:48,161 --> 00:08:49,563 But now? 242 00:08:49,663 --> 00:08:52,399 I think that you might want some engineered hardwood. 243 00:08:52,499 --> 00:08:54,434 But don't worry about it-- I'll get it for you at cost. 244 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,804 -Okay, well, that's good, right? -But it might take 245 00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:58,672 a day or two to arrive from the warehouse. 246 00:08:58,806 --> 00:09:00,173 But don't worry. 247 00:09:00,307 --> 00:09:02,009 I have someplace to stay, 248 00:09:02,109 --> 00:09:04,411 and I'll have time to go see the big donut 249 00:09:04,511 --> 00:09:07,014 and the place where Whoopi Goldberg put her dreadlocks 250 00:09:07,114 --> 00:09:08,415 in the cement. 251 00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:12,953 Okay. Well, uh, now that my floors are all torn up, 252 00:09:13,020 --> 00:09:14,955 -I guess I need a place to stay, too. -Mm. 253 00:09:15,022 --> 00:09:17,991 Well, you're welcome to bunk with me at your pop's house. 254 00:09:19,693 --> 00:09:22,262 Uh, you should know that he likes to sleep in the nude. 255 00:09:22,362 --> 00:09:25,198 And go to the kitchen that way, too. 256 00:09:27,868 --> 00:09:29,402 -Hey, Dad. -(chuckles): Hey! 257 00:09:29,502 --> 00:09:30,904 -Are you taking a break? -No. 258 00:09:31,038 --> 00:09:32,940 Actually, I've already done seven this morning. 259 00:09:33,040 --> 00:09:34,040 Oh, that's great, 260 00:09:34,141 --> 00:09:35,609 'cause I just got an order for 24. 261 00:09:35,709 --> 00:09:37,344 Ooh, that's exciting, buddy. 262 00:09:37,444 --> 00:09:39,479 Yeah. Um... 263 00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:42,315 Hey, is... 264 00:09:42,382 --> 00:09:44,417 is this one, uh, for practice? 265 00:09:45,385 --> 00:09:46,954 There something wrong with it? 266 00:09:48,155 --> 00:09:49,857 No, uh... it's fine. 267 00:09:49,957 --> 00:09:51,458 Like, I can tell you were tired, so... 268 00:09:51,558 --> 00:09:53,894 What? Okay, you know, look, I-I can redo it. 269 00:09:54,027 --> 00:09:56,063 Oh, could you? That'd be great. Thank you. 270 00:09:56,196 --> 00:09:57,530 Uh, that one, too. 271 00:09:58,298 --> 00:10:00,300 Hey, Dave. While you're at the drugstore, 272 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:01,902 I need you to get me some concealer. 273 00:10:02,035 --> 00:10:04,004 Well, I'm gonna need a little more detail than that. 274 00:10:04,104 --> 00:10:05,572 You know what kind of concealer I use. 275 00:10:05,673 --> 00:10:09,176 I'm only vaguely aware of the concept of concealer. 276 00:10:09,276 --> 00:10:11,779 Just get my old one out of the cabinet. 277 00:10:11,912 --> 00:10:13,113 Come on, Grover. We got to go. 278 00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:14,114 Love you. Bye. 279 00:10:14,247 --> 00:10:15,315 This one, too. 280 00:10:19,653 --> 00:10:22,255 Crutch, were you up early watching TV? 281 00:10:22,389 --> 00:10:23,523 Yeah. 282 00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:25,759 I'm on East Coast time. 283 00:10:26,927 --> 00:10:29,663 Well, what was so funny at 4:00 in the morning? 284 00:10:29,763 --> 00:10:32,432 Your boy David Schwimmer on Friends. 285 00:10:34,067 --> 00:10:35,402 He look different. 286 00:10:35,502 --> 00:10:37,304 I think he had work done. 287 00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:39,940 Oh, my goodness. 288 00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:42,109 What the hell, Calvin? It's freezing in here. 289 00:10:42,209 --> 00:10:44,477 The thermostat's at 62 degrees. 290 00:10:44,577 --> 00:10:46,379 I'm a hot sleeper. 291 00:10:48,248 --> 00:10:51,551 You know something? You two have been so gracious to me. 292 00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:53,053 How about letting me make you breakfast? 293 00:10:53,120 --> 00:10:55,756 Who wants some of my famous waffles? 294 00:10:55,856 --> 00:10:57,224 -Oh... -Oh, okay. Well, that's 295 00:10:57,324 --> 00:10:58,826 nice of you, Crutch. Thank you. 296 00:10:58,959 --> 00:11:00,427 It's the least I can do. 297 00:11:00,527 --> 00:11:02,162 -Oh. -Yes. 298 00:11:02,295 --> 00:11:05,098 -Oh, babe, I remember when we were kids. -Mm. 299 00:11:05,198 --> 00:11:07,835 -Crutch's waffles-- fantastic. -(truck backup alarm beeping) 300 00:11:07,935 --> 00:11:08,802 Ooh, okay. 301 00:11:08,902 --> 00:11:10,303 (brakes hissing) 302 00:11:10,403 --> 00:11:11,705 Oh. 303 00:11:12,472 --> 00:11:14,341 Yeah, it's, uh, the delivery truck. 304 00:11:14,474 --> 00:11:16,043 I think the engineered wood is here. 305 00:11:16,143 --> 00:11:18,378 Oh, hallelujah. 306 00:11:19,212 --> 00:11:21,081 Where's your toaster? 307 00:11:27,788 --> 00:11:30,490 You know, I don't think all this stuff is gonna fit. 308 00:11:30,590 --> 00:11:31,658 That's okay. 309 00:11:31,792 --> 00:11:33,326 We can make another trip. 310 00:11:33,460 --> 00:11:34,694 Maybe tomorrow. 311 00:11:34,828 --> 00:11:35,829 Oh, hell no. 312 00:11:35,929 --> 00:11:37,464 Oh, no, no, no, no, no! 313 00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:38,698 No! 314 00:11:38,832 --> 00:11:40,934 No, let's get this done today. I mean, 315 00:11:41,034 --> 00:11:44,371 let's just load up my beautiful Subaru Solterra. 316 00:11:44,504 --> 00:11:47,140 Look, she got all kinds of room. S-See? 317 00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:50,277 Huh. I never pictured you driving a EV. 318 00:11:50,343 --> 00:11:51,845 What is that supposed to mean? 319 00:11:51,979 --> 00:11:53,546 Electric vehicle. 320 00:11:55,515 --> 00:11:56,383 Calvin? 321 00:11:56,483 --> 00:11:57,951 All right, all right, all right. 322 00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,452 Come on, let's just load it up. 323 00:11:59,519 --> 00:12:01,188 Yeah, I don't know. 324 00:12:01,288 --> 00:12:03,556 You sure this car can make it all the way to the beach? 325 00:12:03,690 --> 00:12:04,691 Are you kidding me? 326 00:12:04,825 --> 00:12:06,093 With the range on this baby, 327 00:12:06,193 --> 00:12:08,661 I could drive all the way to Mexico. 328 00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:10,530 We should go to Cancรบn. 329 00:12:11,698 --> 00:12:13,000 Do floors tomorrow. 330 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:15,702 No. O-Okay, o-okay, how-how about this? 331 00:12:15,836 --> 00:12:17,437 You do the floors today 332 00:12:17,537 --> 00:12:20,573 and then I take you to Roscoe's in East L.A. 333 00:12:20,673 --> 00:12:23,376 You won't know the difference. Okay? 334 00:12:23,476 --> 00:12:24,711 -Deal. -Okay. (chuckles) 335 00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:27,214 Even though they waffles ain't as good as mine. 336 00:12:30,650 --> 00:12:32,052 CRUTCH: Ah! 337 00:12:32,152 --> 00:12:34,321 This is the life. 338 00:12:35,923 --> 00:12:38,658 How many fish you think are in there? 339 00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:42,830 I don't know, Crutch. It's the Pacific Ocean. 340 00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:45,498 How about you come in here and help us 341 00:12:45,565 --> 00:12:47,534 -and we can count fish later? -Yeah. 342 00:12:48,335 --> 00:12:49,937 Malcolm, you owe me for this. 343 00:12:50,070 --> 00:12:52,339 I am not built for manual labor. Ow! 344 00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:53,573 See? Splinter. 345 00:12:54,174 --> 00:12:55,742 -Ow! -CALVIN: Okay, okay. 346 00:12:56,543 --> 00:12:58,211 I'm gonna say two million. 347 00:13:02,015 --> 00:13:03,616 (sighs, sputters) 348 00:13:07,020 --> 00:13:09,422 I see what you were trying to do. 349 00:13:10,757 --> 00:13:11,925 So you don't like 'em? 350 00:13:12,059 --> 00:13:13,393 They're getting better. 351 00:13:13,460 --> 00:13:15,062 It's just... 352 00:13:15,128 --> 00:13:16,529 (sighs) When people buy a Grover, 353 00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:19,299 they expect a certain level of quality. 354 00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:22,535 Okay. Grover, I'm doing the best I can. 355 00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:24,271 I mean, look at my hands. They're all cramped up. 356 00:13:24,371 --> 00:13:25,772 They look like blue claws. 357 00:13:25,873 --> 00:13:27,540 I mean, I get it. I get it. 358 00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,476 It's just... (sighs) 359 00:13:29,609 --> 00:13:31,644 These new orders are from juniors. 360 00:13:31,778 --> 00:13:35,482 Okay? So it's one thing to sell subpar shirts to freshmen, 361 00:13:35,582 --> 00:13:37,117 but this... 362 00:13:37,217 --> 00:13:38,418 whatever this is, 363 00:13:38,485 --> 00:13:40,687 it's-it's not gonna fly with the juniors. 364 00:13:43,323 --> 00:13:45,225 Hmm. 365 00:13:46,026 --> 00:13:47,494 Oh. Let me guess-- 366 00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:49,096 the concealer's wrong. 367 00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:50,497 Well, it's just the color. 368 00:13:50,630 --> 00:13:51,932 This is frosted linen. 369 00:13:52,032 --> 00:13:53,833 I use almond pearl. 370 00:13:55,602 --> 00:13:58,271 They looked exactly the same. 371 00:13:58,371 --> 00:14:00,107 I have peach undertones. 372 00:14:00,207 --> 00:14:02,976 (scoffs) But it's okay. 373 00:14:03,076 --> 00:14:04,777 It's okay. You didn't know. 374 00:14:04,878 --> 00:14:05,913 (chuckles) 375 00:14:05,979 --> 00:14:08,648 Well, I can only do so much. 376 00:14:08,748 --> 00:14:11,284 Okay, this one's definitely a freshman shirt. 377 00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:14,521 Oh, God. 378 00:14:14,654 --> 00:14:16,189 Oh. What now? 379 00:14:16,323 --> 00:14:19,492 It's fine. It's just I asked you for a shampoo and conditioner, 380 00:14:19,626 --> 00:14:21,694 and you got me shampoo-conditioner. 381 00:14:22,495 --> 00:14:23,863 What am I missing? 382 00:14:23,964 --> 00:14:25,632 The "and." 383 00:14:28,101 --> 00:14:32,439 I'm sorry that your husband is not Vidal Sassoon. 384 00:14:33,606 --> 00:14:35,308 Is that another one of your boomer friends? 385 00:14:35,408 --> 00:14:37,510 I am an elder millennial! 386 00:14:37,644 --> 00:14:39,980 And you are taking advantage of my generosity. 387 00:14:40,047 --> 00:14:41,514 But no more! 388 00:14:44,684 --> 00:14:46,019 (door opens) 389 00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:48,922 I did not mean to slam the door that hard. 390 00:14:49,022 --> 00:14:51,724 But I am still quite upset. 391 00:14:58,598 --> 00:15:02,135 It's like whatever I do for them, it's never enough. 392 00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:03,270 Get the dry cleaning. 393 00:15:03,336 --> 00:15:04,871 Make these T-shirts. 394 00:15:04,972 --> 00:15:07,574 Become a shampoo expert. 395 00:15:08,775 --> 00:15:10,177 So you ran away from home? 396 00:15:10,310 --> 00:15:11,544 No, Tina. 397 00:15:11,678 --> 00:15:13,646 Running away from home is for children. 398 00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:15,182 I stormed out. 399 00:15:15,282 --> 00:15:16,483 Like a man. 400 00:15:17,850 --> 00:15:19,519 Ah, ah! Don't move. 401 00:15:19,619 --> 00:15:20,820 This area is still wet. 402 00:15:20,887 --> 00:15:23,390 Man, I tell you, these floors are solid. 403 00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:25,325 Ain't no crabs getting in here. 404 00:15:25,392 --> 00:15:26,726 Great. 405 00:15:26,826 --> 00:15:28,295 Malcolm, you owe me a mani-pedi. 406 00:15:28,395 --> 00:15:30,597 What? Why am I getting your toes done? 407 00:15:30,697 --> 00:15:32,465 It's cheaper to do the set. 408 00:15:33,533 --> 00:15:36,903 Once all that sealant dries, Malcolm, 409 00:15:37,004 --> 00:15:39,139 you'll be able to Cha-Cha Slide on these floors, man. 410 00:15:39,206 --> 00:15:41,508 -Hey! -Oh, yes! 411 00:15:41,608 --> 00:15:43,510 And look at the time! 412 00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:44,844 Crutch, you are in luck. 413 00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:46,513 You could be able to catch your red-eye. 414 00:15:46,579 --> 00:15:48,081 -Oh. -Yeah. 415 00:15:48,215 --> 00:15:49,516 Flag on the play, guys. 416 00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:51,618 What-what-what flag? What flag? 417 00:15:52,419 --> 00:15:53,786 This ain't gonna work. 418 00:15:53,886 --> 00:15:56,389 -Why? -The sealant was for the original wood. 419 00:15:57,390 --> 00:15:58,425 Look at the streaks. 420 00:15:58,558 --> 00:15:59,726 What streaks? Uh, what streaks? 421 00:15:59,826 --> 00:16:02,429 I don't see no streaks. What? 422 00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:05,265 You can't see, because when it come to floors, 423 00:16:05,398 --> 00:16:07,400 you don't have the professional eye. 424 00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:09,902 But that's okay. It's gonna take a few days. 425 00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:13,340 I'm just glad I'm getting used to your hard bed. 426 00:16:14,407 --> 00:16:16,109 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, wait. 427 00:16:16,243 --> 00:16:17,544 You staying? 428 00:16:17,610 --> 00:16:19,079 -He's staying? -Okay. 429 00:16:19,179 --> 00:16:21,814 All right. Let-let-let me just talk to him. 430 00:16:21,914 --> 00:16:24,384 -Crutch, what's going on, man? -Get on that. 431 00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:26,653 Nothing. The floors, they just not right. 432 00:16:26,753 --> 00:16:28,621 Come on, these floors are beautiful. 433 00:16:28,721 --> 00:16:30,457 And-and when it comes to flooring, 434 00:16:30,590 --> 00:16:31,958 you don't make mistakes. 435 00:16:32,092 --> 00:16:33,426 Not on the East Coast. 436 00:16:33,526 --> 00:16:34,927 But due to the time change 437 00:16:35,028 --> 00:16:36,429 and your house being so hot-- 438 00:16:36,529 --> 00:16:38,298 Oh. Oh, no, no, no. 439 00:16:38,431 --> 00:16:39,732 I know what this is. 440 00:16:39,799 --> 00:16:41,801 See, this is what you always do 441 00:16:41,934 --> 00:16:43,570 whenever you don't want to do something. 442 00:16:43,636 --> 00:16:47,640 What? You crazy. 443 00:16:48,540 --> 00:16:49,909 Am I? 444 00:16:49,976 --> 00:16:51,944 I mean, you've been doing this since we were kids, man. 445 00:16:52,045 --> 00:16:54,914 This reminds me-- when you were afraid to play tackle football 446 00:16:54,981 --> 00:16:59,018 and told your daddy you had geriatric arthritis. 447 00:17:00,387 --> 00:17:02,222 You were nine. 448 00:17:02,289 --> 00:17:03,590 Fine. 449 00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:05,224 -You got me. -Okay. 450 00:17:05,325 --> 00:17:06,659 The truth is, 451 00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:08,161 been running from my problems, 452 00:17:08,261 --> 00:17:09,862 just like TV's Ross. 453 00:17:11,164 --> 00:17:14,032 You guys, again, I stormed out. 454 00:17:16,069 --> 00:17:18,070 Been married so long. 455 00:17:18,171 --> 00:17:20,307 When Jeanette passed, 456 00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:21,941 just got lonely. 457 00:17:22,008 --> 00:17:23,843 (clicks tongue) Aw, Crutch. 458 00:17:23,976 --> 00:17:25,512 I'm sorry. 459 00:17:25,612 --> 00:17:27,680 I mean, well, what about your kids? 460 00:17:27,780 --> 00:17:29,549 My daughter's in Minnesota. 461 00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:31,384 My son's off in law school. 462 00:17:32,419 --> 00:17:34,787 We don't have what you have here. 463 00:17:36,456 --> 00:17:38,525 I got used to being around family. 464 00:17:38,658 --> 00:17:41,027 Guess I was just trying to make the feeling last. 465 00:17:41,161 --> 00:17:43,496 -Come on, man. We got you, cuz, man. -We're your family. 466 00:17:43,630 --> 00:17:45,532 -You can always FaceTime us. -Yeah. 467 00:17:45,632 --> 00:17:46,899 Yeah, man. 468 00:17:47,667 --> 00:17:48,668 So my floors are finished? 469 00:17:48,801 --> 00:17:50,603 Wrong with you? 470 00:17:51,604 --> 00:17:52,472 Um... 471 00:17:52,539 --> 00:17:54,107 we love you, cuz. 472 00:17:54,207 --> 00:17:55,708 -Yes. -TINA: Yes. 473 00:17:55,842 --> 00:17:57,877 Crutch, you know what, take your time. 474 00:17:57,977 --> 00:17:59,946 -You can stay as long as you like. -Yeah. 475 00:18:00,046 --> 00:18:01,448 Till Sunday. 476 00:18:03,483 --> 00:18:05,885 -Okay, come on, y'all. Let's get out of here. -All right. 477 00:18:06,719 --> 00:18:09,456 No, no, no, no. Not you, David Schwimmer. 478 00:18:09,522 --> 00:18:11,624 You have to wait for that sealant to dry. 479 00:18:11,691 --> 00:18:13,226 How long is that gonna take? 480 00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:15,027 About two, three hours. 481 00:18:16,729 --> 00:18:18,198 All right, now, we gonna see you at the house, Dave. 482 00:18:18,298 --> 00:18:19,866 Yeah, see you later. 483 00:18:24,371 --> 00:18:26,873 You know, your cousin Crutch can be a handful, 484 00:18:26,973 --> 00:18:28,074 but I'm-a miss him. 485 00:18:28,208 --> 00:18:30,009 Yeah. You know, me, too. 486 00:18:30,076 --> 00:18:32,545 And he did save us a few bucks on those new floors. 487 00:18:32,645 --> 00:18:35,982 I just don't know how he managed to spend $300 at Roscoe's. 488 00:18:36,048 --> 00:18:37,450 (chuckles) I do. 489 00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:39,986 This suitcase is full of chicken and waffles. 490 00:18:40,086 --> 00:18:41,221 What? 491 00:18:43,723 --> 00:18:44,891 Hey, Dad. 492 00:18:44,991 --> 00:18:46,426 Um... 493 00:18:47,660 --> 00:18:51,598 Look, I-I really felt bad when you ran away from home. 494 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:57,036 Grover, I stormed out. 495 00:18:57,103 --> 00:18:58,805 That's not really how it came off. 496 00:18:58,905 --> 00:19:00,240 But... 497 00:19:00,373 --> 00:19:01,841 regardless, um, 498 00:19:01,908 --> 00:19:04,844 I'm sorry I rode you so hard about the shirts. 499 00:19:04,944 --> 00:19:06,513 I was not a good boss. 500 00:19:06,613 --> 00:19:09,416 Son, you were not my boss. 501 00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:12,452 Well, not to worry, 502 00:19:12,552 --> 00:19:14,621 because I fixed my production issue. 503 00:19:14,721 --> 00:19:16,589 Um, I'm outsourcing my silk-screening 504 00:19:16,689 --> 00:19:19,992 to a bunch of eighth graders who will do it for 50 cents a shirt. 505 00:19:21,228 --> 00:19:23,796 Grover, that's, like, two dollars an hour. 506 00:19:23,896 --> 00:19:26,433 Yeah, that's why I didn't go to the math kids. 507 00:19:30,770 --> 00:19:32,772 Dave, I just want you to know 508 00:19:32,872 --> 00:19:35,608 how much I appreciate all you've been doing for us. 509 00:19:35,708 --> 00:19:36,976 And if I haven't said it-- 510 00:19:37,109 --> 00:19:38,511 You haven't said it. 511 00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:41,248 Well, I just said it. 512 00:19:44,384 --> 00:19:45,785 Okay, well... 513 00:19:45,885 --> 00:19:46,886 I forgive you. 514 00:19:46,986 --> 00:19:48,988 -Aw. -Can you not? 515 00:19:49,088 --> 00:19:52,592 -How do you think we made you? -It's so normal. 516 00:19:52,659 --> 00:19:54,627 -Hey, hey, cuzzo! -(chuckles) 517 00:19:54,727 --> 00:19:55,928 You ready to go? 518 00:19:55,995 --> 00:19:56,996 -Yep. -(chuckles) 519 00:19:57,129 --> 00:19:58,798 Been fun, but I got to go home. 520 00:19:58,898 --> 00:20:00,567 -Aw. -Need to feed my snake 521 00:20:00,667 --> 00:20:02,001 or I won't have a cat. 522 00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:05,171 Wow! 523 00:20:05,272 --> 00:20:07,139 Lisa Kudrow! 524 00:20:09,776 --> 00:20:11,611 You guys are friends in real life? 525 00:20:11,678 --> 00:20:13,546 -Just go with it. -Oh. 526 00:20:14,981 --> 00:20:17,116 It's been great seeing you, Crutch. 527 00:20:17,183 --> 00:20:19,919 Yeah, you know, I hope it's not so long till the next time. 528 00:20:20,019 --> 00:20:22,255 Well, it doesn't have to be. You know, my son Jake 529 00:20:22,322 --> 00:20:24,291 is graduating from law school. 530 00:20:24,391 --> 00:20:25,525 Y'all two should come. 531 00:20:25,658 --> 00:20:27,560 Oh, my God. To New York? 532 00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:28,595 Oh, yeah. I'm in. 533 00:20:28,661 --> 00:20:30,697 I mean, shopping, Broadway show, 534 00:20:30,830 --> 00:20:32,432 room service, shopping. 535 00:20:32,532 --> 00:20:33,433 -Well... -Oh, my God. 536 00:20:33,500 --> 00:20:34,767 I mean, you know, 537 00:20:34,834 --> 00:20:35,835 I already spent a lot of money 538 00:20:35,935 --> 00:20:37,136 on these new floors, so... 539 00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:38,538 -Oh, come on. -I mean, it's got to be 540 00:20:38,671 --> 00:20:40,440 the most expensive hookup I've ever gotten. 541 00:20:40,540 --> 00:20:43,009 But Calvin, you keep saying how important family is. 542 00:20:43,109 --> 00:20:44,110 Right, Crutch? 543 00:20:44,210 --> 00:20:45,144 Absolutely. 544 00:20:45,211 --> 00:20:46,279 Huh. 545 00:20:46,379 --> 00:20:47,814 I'm gonna go book it right now. 546 00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:49,048 Ha! 547 00:20:50,182 --> 00:20:52,051 See what you did? 548 00:20:52,184 --> 00:20:53,353 You know what? 549 00:20:53,453 --> 00:20:55,121 I hope TSA confiscate every breast, 550 00:20:55,221 --> 00:20:56,756 thigh, and wing you got in there. 551 00:21:02,862 --> 00:21:05,898 Captioning sponsored by CBS 552 00:21:05,965 --> 00:21:08,635 and TOYOTA. 553 00:21:08,768 --> 00:21:12,171 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 38907

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