Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:07,165 --> 00:00:09,570
This is the transport?
Yes.
2
00:00:09,595 --> 00:00:12,539
What do you think?
Uh... I feel bad.
3
00:00:12,564 --> 00:00:14,450
Why?
Because I've eaten camel before.
4
00:00:14,475 --> 00:00:16,419
CAMEL GROWLS
How do you cook a camel?
5
00:00:16,444 --> 00:00:19,180
Braise it.
Ah, so it's like a long...
6
00:00:19,205 --> 00:00:21,810
Can have this conversation
away from the camels?
7
00:00:21,835 --> 00:00:23,850
Well, listen... It's Christmas...
8
00:00:23,875 --> 00:00:26,450
CAMEL GROWLS
9
00:00:26,475 --> 00:00:28,060
Shit.
LAUGHTER
10
00:00:28,085 --> 00:00:31,570
They're all getting up!
Now, how are we gonna get up there?
11
00:00:31,595 --> 00:00:33,590
CAMEL GROWLS
12
00:00:33,615 --> 00:00:36,950
He doesn't like you.
GINO LAUGHS
13
00:00:36,975 --> 00:00:39,090
CAMEL GROWLS
14
00:00:39,115 --> 00:00:40,489
LAUGHS
15
00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:44,010
Can you take a picture of us three?
16
00:00:45,394 --> 00:00:47,619
ALL: Happy Christmas!
17
00:00:50,644 --> 00:00:53,340
LAUGHS
'Gino D'Acampo, Fred Sirieix
18
00:00:53,365 --> 00:00:55,900
'and I are on a festive,
culinary adventure.'
19
00:00:55,925 --> 00:00:57,210
Gino!
20
00:00:58,805 --> 00:01:01,920
"Come to Jerusalem to celebrate
Christmas with me." Really?
21
00:01:03,745 --> 00:01:06,450
'Thanks to a classic
D'Acampo cock-up, we're in...
22
00:01:06,475 --> 00:01:08,010
'Morocco.'
23
00:01:08,035 --> 00:01:11,650
I like it. Not the most obvious
choice for a Christmas getaway.
24
00:01:11,675 --> 00:01:13,489
It's a cobra!
25
00:01:13,514 --> 00:01:16,090
Mind the donkey on the
left and the car on the right.
26
00:01:16,115 --> 00:01:17,650
SCREAMING
'But, as always,
27
00:01:17,675 --> 00:01:19,930
'we'll be seeking out
the very best ingredients.'
28
00:01:19,955 --> 00:01:21,810
How's the eyeball?
29
00:01:24,235 --> 00:01:25,289
Disgusting.
30
00:01:25,314 --> 00:01:28,619
'The warmest hospitality...'
31
00:01:28,644 --> 00:01:30,650
Can you make 5,000 of those?
32
00:01:30,675 --> 00:01:32,419
'..And Yuletide cheer.'
33
00:01:32,444 --> 00:01:34,730
You have to be kidding me.
Merry Christmas.
34
00:01:34,755 --> 00:01:36,930
CHEERS
35
00:01:36,955 --> 00:01:38,700
'Three amigos.'
LAUGHS
36
00:01:38,725 --> 00:01:40,340
'Three big egos.'
37
00:01:40,365 --> 00:01:43,090
I hate turkey.
What?!
38
00:01:43,115 --> 00:01:46,340
You're not cooking it properly.
'Back in the saddle, again.'
39
00:01:47,875 --> 00:01:49,450
On my fork?
Yeah.
40
00:01:52,155 --> 00:01:53,289
SCREAMS
41
00:01:53,314 --> 00:01:54,619
LAUGHTER
42
00:01:56,365 --> 00:02:01,169
# We three Kings of Orient are. #
43
00:02:08,725 --> 00:02:13,419
"Would you like to come to Jerusalem
for Christmas?" Great idea, Gino.
44
00:02:13,444 --> 00:02:15,419
Oui, the land of the three kings!
45
00:02:15,444 --> 00:02:19,930
So why on earth
are we in the middle of Morocco?
46
00:02:19,955 --> 00:02:22,090
Oh, come on.
I got good deals on the tickets.
47
00:02:22,115 --> 00:02:23,260
What a doughnut.
48
00:02:23,285 --> 00:02:25,210
CAMEL GROWLS
49
00:02:25,235 --> 00:02:28,489
Why don't you just
embrace the Christmas in Morocco?
50
00:02:28,514 --> 00:02:31,090
Brahim, how do you celebrate
Christmas in Morocco?
51
00:02:31,115 --> 00:02:33,770
CAMEL GROWLS
52
00:02:33,795 --> 00:02:36,340
Yeah, what's wrong with that?
53
00:02:36,365 --> 00:02:38,130
A lot's wrong with it.
CAMEL GROWLS
54
00:02:38,155 --> 00:02:39,700
Oh, this one is kicking!
55
00:02:39,725 --> 00:02:43,930
Listen, we are in Morocco.
Here, the food is fantastic.
56
00:02:43,955 --> 00:02:47,570
We gonna embrace the culture,
it's gonna be amazing.
57
00:02:49,155 --> 00:02:50,289
'Thanks to Gino,
58
00:02:50,314 --> 00:02:53,289
'our journey starts in the foothills
of the Atlas Mountains.'
59
00:02:53,314 --> 00:02:56,570
We are heading north,
through the Agafay Desert,
60
00:02:56,595 --> 00:02:59,130
to Morocco's cultural capital,
Marrakesh.
61
00:02:59,155 --> 00:03:01,770
Home to the famous Medina.
62
00:03:04,595 --> 00:03:07,570
It's very uncomfortable.
MOCKS ACCENT: Uncomfortable?
63
00:03:07,595 --> 00:03:08,980
LAUGHS
Uncomfortable.
64
00:03:09,005 --> 00:03:11,650
CAMEL GROWLS
Whoa! Holy shit.
65
00:03:11,675 --> 00:03:14,930
"Fancy Christmas in Jerusalem?"
Really?
66
00:03:20,205 --> 00:03:23,399
Listen, guys, Christmas is not about
where you are.
67
00:03:23,424 --> 00:03:27,090
Christmas is about the people
you are with.
68
00:03:27,115 --> 00:03:29,880
And I love the fact
that I am with you two at Christmas.
69
00:03:34,295 --> 00:03:37,629
'These ships of the desert
can walk all day without stopping.
70
00:03:37,654 --> 00:03:39,830
'Us? Not so much.'
71
00:03:39,855 --> 00:03:42,990
Gino, I'm surprised
you haven't moaned yet.
72
00:03:43,015 --> 00:03:45,910
I tell you what,
my testicles are killing me.
73
00:03:45,935 --> 00:03:48,070
Have you ever got lost
in the desert, Brahim?
74
00:03:50,125 --> 00:03:53,020
Wow.
75
00:03:53,045 --> 00:03:57,020
My legs are killing me, Gino.
How much further to go? Seriously.
76
00:03:57,045 --> 00:03:59,780
I need a wee.
77
00:04:06,375 --> 00:04:09,350
Where are we going?
78
00:04:10,935 --> 00:04:13,350
# Joy to the world
79
00:04:13,375 --> 00:04:15,660
# The Lord is come. #
80
00:04:17,095 --> 00:04:20,140
'Arab and Berber tribespeople have
been living in the Agafay Desert
81
00:04:20,165 --> 00:04:21,220
'for thousands of years.'
82
00:04:23,125 --> 00:04:25,860
'We'll never get to Marrakesh
before nightfall.
83
00:04:25,885 --> 00:04:29,070
'We can only hope
there's some room at the inn.'
84
00:04:30,404 --> 00:04:33,020
Gino. I've trapped one of my balls.
85
00:04:33,045 --> 00:04:35,379
This is the worst bit for me.
86
00:04:35,404 --> 00:04:37,070
GROANS
Shit.
87
00:04:38,324 --> 00:04:40,350
CAMEL GROWLS
88
00:04:40,375 --> 00:04:42,220
LAUGHTER
89
00:04:44,045 --> 00:04:45,990
SPEAKS ARABIC
90
00:04:46,015 --> 00:04:48,419
Bonjour.
Nice to see you.
91
00:04:48,444 --> 00:04:51,830
SPEAKS ARABIC
92
00:04:51,855 --> 00:04:54,549
Bonjour, Madame. May we take our...?
93
00:04:56,735 --> 00:04:58,070
SPEAKS ARABIC
94
00:04:58,095 --> 00:05:00,070
BRAHIM TRANSLATING:
95
00:05:00,095 --> 00:05:02,270
Thank you. We're honoured
to be here. Thank you.
96
00:05:02,295 --> 00:05:05,549
How old is the house?
97
00:05:05,574 --> 00:05:08,190
A hundred years.
98
00:05:08,215 --> 00:05:11,070
Wow.
99
00:05:11,095 --> 00:05:12,940
Who is the best cook here?
100
00:05:14,375 --> 00:05:16,780
No, not you!
We are talking about the family.
101
00:05:18,495 --> 00:05:21,629
Little lady.
Do you cook? Ask her if she cooks?
102
00:05:23,295 --> 00:05:25,270
No.
Nothing?
103
00:05:25,295 --> 00:05:27,549
SPEAKS ARABIC
104
00:05:32,324 --> 00:05:35,460
Thank you.
105
00:05:35,485 --> 00:05:38,990
To pay him back, it'd be nice
to cook and help with dinner.
106
00:05:39,015 --> 00:05:41,419
Where are we sleeping, please?
107
00:05:50,245 --> 00:05:51,460
Wow. Nice.
108
00:05:51,485 --> 00:05:54,020
Thank you.
So this is the kitchen?
109
00:05:54,045 --> 00:05:57,060
Is there... like, like, a larder?
110
00:05:57,085 --> 00:05:58,270
Gotcha.
111
00:06:00,654 --> 00:06:01,860
Gordon!
112
00:06:01,885 --> 00:06:03,660
LAUGHS
113
00:06:03,685 --> 00:06:06,379
What is that?
114
00:06:06,404 --> 00:06:09,060
That's what you're having tonight.
LAUGHS
115
00:06:09,085 --> 00:06:10,169
How does this work?
116
00:06:11,735 --> 00:06:14,020
GRUNTS
117
00:06:19,444 --> 00:06:21,350
GRUNTS
118
00:06:24,574 --> 00:06:25,810
Oh, it's so hard.
119
00:06:28,685 --> 00:06:30,830
GROANS
120
00:06:30,855 --> 00:06:32,499
How do you put these poles up?
121
00:06:32,524 --> 00:06:34,499
Some cumin, tomatoes.
122
00:06:34,524 --> 00:06:37,580
'My contribution to dinner
is a local fish, tilapia,
123
00:06:37,605 --> 00:06:40,060
'cooked with ingredients
I raided from the larder.'
124
00:06:40,085 --> 00:06:41,419
What you put in, lemon?
125
00:06:41,444 --> 00:06:42,830
So, preserved lemon...
Yeah?
126
00:06:42,855 --> 00:06:45,580
...some rosemary, some garlic,
yeah. Just inside.
127
00:06:45,605 --> 00:06:47,940
My daughter, she's the same age,
128
00:06:47,965 --> 00:06:50,740
seven years old,
and she already cooks.
129
00:06:50,765 --> 00:06:54,350
OK, so
we can do this together, then.
130
00:06:54,375 --> 00:06:57,860
We want to put all the...
Can I talk?
131
00:06:57,885 --> 00:07:00,940
Do you need to make all this noise?
I'm chopping garlic!
132
00:07:00,965 --> 00:07:02,350
What's wrong with you?
133
00:07:02,375 --> 00:07:04,140
We need to put all the almonds...
134
00:07:04,165 --> 00:07:07,220
We need to put all the dried fruits
in there
135
00:07:07,245 --> 00:07:10,940
and then we mix it and we make it
into a... a sweet bread.
136
00:07:10,965 --> 00:07:13,060
Yes.
137
00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:17,549
I can't hold them up!
138
00:07:19,015 --> 00:07:21,419
I have never done anything
like this in my life.
139
00:07:23,045 --> 00:07:25,020
Et voila.
140
00:07:26,574 --> 00:07:27,910
Not great.
141
00:07:27,935 --> 00:07:30,499
So this fish
is gonna be grilled.
142
00:07:30,524 --> 00:07:33,140
I'm just worried that it's not gonna
feed us all. ls there any meat?
143
00:07:33,165 --> 00:07:34,660
SPEAKS ARABIC
144
00:07:34,685 --> 00:07:37,780
Oh, we have meat, then.
145
00:07:43,965 --> 00:07:46,780
Wow. Has it got the brains in there?
146
00:07:46,805 --> 00:07:49,860
Being here, it makes you realise
147
00:07:49,885 --> 00:07:52,860
that we have
far too many things in life.
148
00:07:52,885 --> 00:07:55,860
Can she say brava?
149
00:07:55,885 --> 00:07:57,629
Brava.
Brava!
150
00:07:57,654 --> 00:08:02,990
People could very happily live in
a place like this, in this desert,
151
00:08:03,015 --> 00:08:05,020
where there is nothing.
152
00:08:05,045 --> 00:08:08,629
If your family are together,
everybody's happy.
153
00:08:08,654 --> 00:08:09,700
Egg wash?
Si.
154
00:08:09,725 --> 00:08:11,990
LAUGHING: Egg wash?
Did you see any eggs?
155
00:08:12,015 --> 00:08:13,100
I heard a chicken.
156
00:08:13,125 --> 00:08:15,350
GORDON LAUGHS
157
00:08:15,375 --> 00:08:17,299
Just one.
One, just to brush.
158
00:08:19,524 --> 00:08:21,629
She hides her eggs?
159
00:08:22,685 --> 00:08:23,660
She hides her eggs.
160
00:08:25,125 --> 00:08:26,580
Oh, my goodness me.
161
00:08:26,605 --> 00:08:29,080
You got it?
Yeah. In the wardrobe.
162
00:08:29,105 --> 00:08:31,120
GINO LAUGHS
Merci.
163
00:08:31,145 --> 00:08:34,000
If you glaze this, it's gonna
come out so beautiful.
164
00:08:34,025 --> 00:08:36,640
The problem is the flour
that they use.
165
00:08:36,665 --> 00:08:39,200
LAUGHTER
ls important.
166
00:08:40,424 --> 00:08:43,200
A little bit of oil on the bottom,
just not to stick.
167
00:08:43,225 --> 00:08:44,720
How do we turn the gas up?
168
00:08:44,745 --> 00:08:46,279
LAUGHTER
169
00:08:46,304 --> 00:08:47,760
What's that, there?
170
00:08:47,785 --> 00:08:50,479
The poo of the goats.
Goat shit.
171
00:08:50,504 --> 00:08:52,250
We put the goat poo
in there, as well?
172
00:08:53,995 --> 00:08:55,120
LS it?
173
00:08:55,145 --> 00:08:56,399
Oh, OK.
174
00:08:56,424 --> 00:08:58,450
Some... some poo.
175
00:08:58,475 --> 00:09:00,560
The shit is in.
176
00:09:01,915 --> 00:09:03,529
What are you doing?!
177
00:09:03,554 --> 00:09:07,279
This is the old style of living,
you know, in this desert
178
00:09:07,304 --> 00:09:09,479
and they're happy.
It's pretty remarkable.
179
00:09:09,504 --> 00:09:12,040
We are gonna eat together,
there, around that very fire,
180
00:09:12,065 --> 00:09:15,120
I mean, this is proper hospitality.
181
00:09:16,554 --> 00:09:19,000
Oh, wow. This looks beautiful.
182
00:09:19,025 --> 00:09:21,609
Oh, grazie.
Fantastic. Thank you.
183
00:09:21,634 --> 00:09:23,040
This is a wonderful treat.
184
00:09:23,065 --> 00:09:25,920
Back home, we'd be getting
ready with turkeys and beef
185
00:09:25,945 --> 00:09:29,399
and this is completely different.
186
00:09:29,424 --> 00:09:31,200
Look at the children's faces.
187
00:09:31,225 --> 00:09:34,521
If I give this to my kids, they
would never talk to me again.
188
00:09:38,337 --> 00:09:39,521
Right.
189
00:09:39,546 --> 00:09:40,632
Oh, really?
190
00:09:40,657 --> 00:09:42,502
This is gonna be like
a Bushtucker Trial.
191
00:09:44,546 --> 00:09:45,632
It's for me.
192
00:09:47,827 --> 00:09:49,141
LAUGHS
193
00:09:49,166 --> 00:09:52,112
For Gordon?
194
00:09:52,137 --> 00:09:54,962
No, for you,
listen to him! Yeah.
195
00:09:54,987 --> 00:09:56,632
What did he get, the dick?
196
00:09:56,657 --> 00:09:59,192
LAUGHS
It's the head.
197
00:09:59,217 --> 00:10:00,312
Oh, OK.
198
00:10:00,337 --> 00:10:02,112
You don't have that in the head.
199
00:10:02,137 --> 00:10:04,391
Unless you're a dickhead.
LAUGHTER
200
00:10:06,087 --> 00:10:07,391
Merci beaucoup.
201
00:10:07,416 --> 00:10:09,271
Do we say, uh, grace?
202
00:10:09,296 --> 00:10:11,802
Bismillah. Bismillah.
203
00:10:11,827 --> 00:10:14,162
Bismillah.
Thank you.
204
00:10:14,187 --> 00:10:18,552
I've got a... I've got a cheek.
The sheep head's delicious.
205
00:10:18,577 --> 00:10:19,832
Really good.
206
00:10:21,697 --> 00:10:23,782
Oh, my God.
How's the eyeball?
207
00:10:27,777 --> 00:10:29,242
Disgusting.
208
00:10:29,267 --> 00:10:33,032
SPEAKS ARABIC
209
00:10:40,937 --> 00:10:43,271
Has Mustapha.
210
00:10:43,296 --> 00:10:46,082
Can I ask Grandad,
how was the fish?
211
00:10:46,107 --> 00:10:48,882
Number one?
212
00:10:48,907 --> 00:10:50,271
Thank you.
213
00:10:50,296 --> 00:10:52,952
Shall we have the sweet bread?
214
00:10:52,977 --> 00:10:54,552
You like it.
Bueno?
215
00:10:54,577 --> 00:10:57,952
Brava. See, she talks Italian, now.
216
00:11:02,727 --> 00:11:06,752
So, every Christmas and New Year,
we would clink glasses and go...
217
00:11:06,777 --> 00:11:08,521
"Cheers."
Salute.
218
00:11:08,546 --> 00:11:11,271
Thank you.
ALL:
219
00:11:11,296 --> 00:11:14,112
Merry Christmas.
220
00:11:14,137 --> 00:11:15,702
Merry Desert Christmas.
221
00:11:17,376 --> 00:11:20,082
This is where we're gonna sleep.
Seriously?
222
00:11:20,107 --> 00:11:22,312
What do you mean we're gonna sleep?
This is all open, man.
223
00:11:22,337 --> 00:11:23,391
What is this bag?
224
00:11:23,416 --> 00:11:26,312
It's Christmas decoration,
I got all the Christmas decoration,
225
00:11:26,337 --> 00:11:28,242
so then
it looks like it's Christmas.
226
00:11:28,267 --> 00:11:29,632
Where are you going, now?
227
00:11:29,657 --> 00:11:32,032
I need to go for a wee
and I'm getting changed.
228
00:11:32,057 --> 00:11:37,632
# It's beginning to look
A lot like Christmas. #
229
00:11:37,657 --> 00:11:39,521
What kind of decoration
did you have, Gordon,
230
00:11:39,546 --> 00:11:41,391
when you were at home,
when you were a boy?
231
00:11:41,416 --> 00:11:43,552
Chocolate Santas
and gingerbread men.
232
00:11:43,577 --> 00:11:44,702
# But the prettiest sight to see
233
00:11:44,727 --> 00:11:47,721
# ls the holly that will be
234
00:11:47,746 --> 00:11:52,082
# On your own front door. #
235
00:11:54,416 --> 00:11:56,112
You have to be kidding me.
236
00:11:56,137 --> 00:11:58,062
It's warm and it's cosy.
I don't care.
237
00:11:58,087 --> 00:12:00,882
LAUGHS
The shoes!
238
00:12:00,907 --> 00:12:03,112
Come round here,
I want you to go on my shoulders
239
00:12:03,137 --> 00:12:05,271
and then you can go
on the top of the tree.
240
00:12:05,296 --> 00:12:06,141
Are you kidding me?
241
00:12:08,777 --> 00:12:10,992
This is gonna look beautiful,
Gordon.
242
00:12:11,017 --> 00:12:14,521
Oh, the eyeball is repeating on
me. Don't you dare fart.
243
00:12:14,546 --> 00:12:17,391
LAUGHTER
I got the eyeballs coming out.
244
00:12:17,416 --> 00:12:19,632
You keep that in that fucking
onesie, don't you dare.
245
00:12:19,657 --> 00:12:21,912
Get him down, get him down!
246
00:12:23,366 --> 00:12:26,112
Look, guys, there is a star,
as well. Look!
247
00:12:27,616 --> 00:12:29,802
These people,
they may not celebrate Christmas,
248
00:12:29,827 --> 00:12:31,952
but we definitely brought
Christmas to Morocco!
249
00:12:31,977 --> 00:12:33,062
How about that?
250
00:12:33,087 --> 00:12:38,752
# It's beginning to look
a lot like Christmas. #
251
00:12:38,777 --> 00:12:40,912
I used to love it
when it snowed at Christmas,
252
00:12:40,937 --> 00:12:42,632
because that really confirmed
253
00:12:42,657 --> 00:12:44,632
that Father Christmas
was literally en route.
254
00:12:44,657 --> 00:12:46,882
Gordon, can I have
some of the quilt?
255
00:12:49,657 --> 00:12:53,952
You seriously only had one
flipping job to do!
256
00:12:53,977 --> 00:12:56,802
Fucking hell. Useless!
257
00:12:56,827 --> 00:12:58,422
CAMEL GROWLS
258
00:13:03,057 --> 00:13:04,552
# You better watch out
259
00:13:04,577 --> 00:13:06,192
# You better not cry
260
00:13:06,217 --> 00:13:10,442
# You better not pout
I'm telling you why
261
00:13:10,467 --> 00:13:15,162
# Gordon, Gino and Fred
are in town. #
262
00:13:15,187 --> 00:13:16,471
LAUGHS
263
00:13:16,496 --> 00:13:18,442
Ready, boys?
Oh, yes.
264
00:13:18,467 --> 00:13:21,442
# He sees you when you're sleeping
265
00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:24,982
# He knows when you're awake
266
00:13:25,007 --> 00:13:28,591
# He knows if you've been
Bad or good,
267
00:13:28,616 --> 00:13:30,982
# So be good, for goodness sake.
268
00:13:31,007 --> 00:13:32,721
# Oh, oh, oh. #
269
00:13:32,746 --> 00:13:33,882
CAR BEEPS
270
00:13:33,907 --> 00:13:34,982
LAUGHTER
Ohhhh!
271
00:13:35,007 --> 00:13:38,672
Gordon, Gordon, Gordon!
Don't antagonise the locals, please!
272
00:13:38,697 --> 00:13:40,112
CARS BEEP
273
00:13:40,137 --> 00:13:41,632
'After our debacle
in the desert,
274
00:13:41,657 --> 00:13:45,232
'thank God we've been reunited
with our trusty camper van.'
275
00:13:45,257 --> 00:13:48,391
Let's not get arrested. But you're
supposed to be navigating.
276
00:13:48,416 --> 00:13:51,192
'We are heading into Marrakesh's
old town, or Medina.
277
00:13:51,217 --> 00:13:54,591
'I'm trying to find the main square,
jemaa el-Fnaa'
278
00:13:54,616 --> 00:13:56,232
You know where we are going, right?
279
00:13:56,257 --> 00:13:58,672
SATNAV SPEAKS ARABIC
280
00:13:58,697 --> 00:14:01,312
I've no... You're supposed
to be on the satnav.
281
00:14:01,337 --> 00:14:02,882
This is all in Arabic.
282
00:14:02,907 --> 00:14:05,232
I have no idea what this thing says.
BEEPS
283
00:14:08,007 --> 00:14:11,112
How am I gonna navigate
if it says Arab, Arabic.
284
00:14:11,137 --> 00:14:13,552
Stop whingeing, it's Christmas,
what's wrong with you two?
285
00:14:13,577 --> 00:14:15,141
BEEPING
THEY SCREAM
286
00:14:16,467 --> 00:14:17,882
My friend...
287
00:14:17,907 --> 00:14:20,672
Oh, my lord.
Shit.
288
00:14:20,697 --> 00:14:22,882
Gordon, Gordon, Gordon, Gordon!
289
00:14:22,907 --> 00:14:25,632
Can you focus on staying
in the middle of the road?
290
00:14:25,657 --> 00:14:27,802
I'm trying, the bikes
are on the inside!
291
00:14:27,827 --> 00:14:29,471
I'm feeling anxious.
292
00:14:29,496 --> 00:14:31,032
BEEPING
293
00:14:31,057 --> 00:14:33,232
Mind the donkey on the left
and the car on the right.
294
00:14:33,257 --> 00:14:35,552
GINO IMITATES HONKING
There's no structure.
295
00:14:35,577 --> 00:14:37,882
What is called?
296
00:14:37,907 --> 00:14:41,032
Jemaa el-Fnaa? jemaa el-Fnaa.
297
00:14:41,057 --> 00:14:43,591
My friend!
Jemaa elf... Ah-fina.
298
00:14:43,616 --> 00:14:45,752
Jemaa el- Fnaa.
299
00:14:45,777 --> 00:14:47,882
Jemaa el... hell... Fnaa.
300
00:14:49,007 --> 00:14:51,192
He says straight, straight.
301
00:14:51,217 --> 00:14:52,672
Right. This looks like it over here.
302
00:14:54,007 --> 00:14:56,232
Oh, this must be this.
303
00:14:56,257 --> 00:14:59,802
Look at that.
It's like a festival of colours.
304
00:14:59,827 --> 00:15:03,632
This is amazing.
Look at the colour of the food.
305
00:15:03,657 --> 00:15:05,752
Can we park this van,
I want to go and walk now.
306
00:15:12,107 --> 00:15:14,622
You know, this place,
jemaa el-Fnaa. Yes.
307
00:15:14,647 --> 00:15:17,521
It used to be the place where public
executions took place. What?!
308
00:15:17,546 --> 00:15:21,032
Yeah. The name of the place means
The Assembly Of The Dead.
309
00:15:21,057 --> 00:15:22,872
They used to chop
all the heads here!
310
00:15:26,937 --> 00:15:28,672
'It's not my first time in Morocco.
311
00:15:28,697 --> 00:15:30,672
'I fell in love with this country
years ago.
312
00:15:30,697 --> 00:15:33,442
'But, I think the boys are in for a
shock, because it is pandemonium.'
313
00:15:33,467 --> 00:15:35,312
'You've gotta be on your toes.'
314
00:15:35,337 --> 00:15:37,982
Gino is not fast-thinking
and Fred, well, God bless him,
315
00:15:38,007 --> 00:15:39,832
you know, he's not the sharpest tool
in the box.
316
00:15:39,857 --> 00:15:41,952
Oh, look, snakes!
317
00:15:43,296 --> 00:15:46,252
Oh, my lord.
Oh, to hell!
318
00:15:46,277 --> 00:15:48,722
Oh! Ask if they bite.
319
00:15:49,997 --> 00:15:51,772
Yeah, they bite!
320
00:15:52,957 --> 00:15:55,972
Biting his head.
Yeah. Why would you do that?
321
00:15:55,997 --> 00:15:59,972
It's almost like a performing zoo,
but it's their culture.
322
00:15:59,997 --> 00:16:01,361
It's how they survive.
323
00:16:01,386 --> 00:16:03,052
This is crazy!
324
00:16:03,077 --> 00:16:05,252
Oh, shoot, he just got a bite.
325
00:16:05,277 --> 00:16:06,892
Ask if they're poison.
326
00:16:11,316 --> 00:16:13,462
Shit, no!
LAUGHS
327
00:16:13,487 --> 00:16:14,932
No way, no, no.
328
00:16:14,957 --> 00:16:17,132
No way am I doing that.
329
00:16:19,207 --> 00:16:20,572
SCREAMS
330
00:16:22,487 --> 00:16:25,082
What's going on here?
331
00:16:28,766 --> 00:16:31,182
Watch out, watch out, watch out.
Oh, fuck that.
332
00:16:34,027 --> 00:16:36,002
CHANTS
333
00:16:36,027 --> 00:16:37,572
It's a cobra! It's a cobra!
334
00:16:39,597 --> 00:16:41,281
Shit, shit, shit.
335
00:16:43,237 --> 00:16:47,182
LAUGHS
336
00:16:48,747 --> 00:16:51,252
Oh, my God. Here he goes again.
337
00:16:52,386 --> 00:16:55,002
'Fred dives into things
without thinking.'
338
00:16:55,027 --> 00:16:57,002
Finally, I think Fred's got balls.
339
00:16:57,027 --> 00:16:58,332
Gordon!
340
00:16:58,357 --> 00:17:02,002
Oh, my God, no, no, no.
I was petrified.
341
00:17:02,027 --> 00:17:03,252
Pet-ri-fied!
342
00:17:03,277 --> 00:17:04,572
But, at the end of the day,
343
00:17:04,597 --> 00:17:08,772
somebody's gotta step up and show
these two clowns how it's done.
344
00:17:08,797 --> 00:17:10,611
APPLAUSE
345
00:17:12,386 --> 00:17:13,892
I was fucking shitting myself.
Huh?
346
00:17:13,917 --> 00:17:15,411
Shitting myself.
347
00:17:25,656 --> 00:17:28,551
Is it me or this place
is full of knick-knack?
348
00:17:28,576 --> 00:17:30,631
It's incredible.
349
00:17:30,656 --> 00:17:33,872
It's almost like walking
through a postcard. Ready?
350
00:17:33,897 --> 00:17:36,431
'My slightly unhinged friends and I
351
00:17:36,456 --> 00:17:38,301
'had made it to Marrakesh,
352
00:17:38,326 --> 00:17:40,582
'the city that Churchill described
353
00:17:40,607 --> 00:17:42,662
'as the Paris of the Sahara.
354
00:17:42,687 --> 00:17:45,222
'Of course,
Gino wants to rock the Kasbah.'
355
00:17:45,247 --> 00:17:47,942
Shall we do some shopping?
What are you looking for?
356
00:17:47,967 --> 00:17:51,792
I want to get a belly dancer costume
for my wife.
357
00:17:51,817 --> 00:17:54,272
Can you imagine?
No. No, I cannot.
358
00:17:55,377 --> 00:17:58,022
Hey, that's what you wanted.
359
00:17:58,047 --> 00:18:01,192
I want you to just model for me
for a sec.
360
00:18:01,217 --> 00:18:03,222
Move a little bit.
361
00:18:03,247 --> 00:18:05,431
That's it. I like it.
362
00:18:05,456 --> 00:18:07,472
800?
363
00:18:07,497 --> 00:18:09,402
Tell him I'll get another wife.
364
00:18:11,576 --> 00:18:14,301
I'm gonna put Gino inside, rub it.
365
00:18:14,326 --> 00:18:17,272
Hopefully he'll pop out
a bigger man.
366
00:18:17,297 --> 00:18:19,301
Look at the magic carpet.
367
00:18:19,326 --> 00:18:20,992
Look at this.
368
00:18:21,017 --> 00:18:23,152
What are these, spices?
369
00:18:33,576 --> 00:18:35,301
It's like being in a doctor's.
370
00:18:37,656 --> 00:18:39,792
Have you got something for...?
371
00:18:42,456 --> 00:18:45,192
Oh, Jesus. I need
a Christmas present for my wife.
372
00:18:45,217 --> 00:18:47,862
OK.
373
00:18:49,737 --> 00:18:52,301
Pfft! That stinks.
374
00:18:52,326 --> 00:18:54,301
How does it work?
375
00:18:59,297 --> 00:19:02,912
Oh, my God.
376
00:19:02,937 --> 00:19:05,222
Ping? So, three bags of that,
377
00:19:05,247 --> 00:19:07,402
and three bags of that, please.
378
00:19:07,427 --> 00:19:09,912
Is this female Viagra, is it legal?
379
00:19:09,937 --> 00:19:11,662
Of course.
380
00:19:11,687 --> 00:19:13,912
He's shy.
We'll take it for you, Gordon.
381
00:19:13,937 --> 00:19:15,942
Don't worry.
382
00:19:15,967 --> 00:19:18,712
What kind of Christmas is this?
383
00:19:18,737 --> 00:19:20,792
Spice up your Christmas, my friend.
384
00:19:20,817 --> 00:19:23,402
My life does not need spicing.
Mr Boring Ramsay.
385
00:19:23,427 --> 00:19:25,431
B-O-R-l-N-G.
386
00:19:25,456 --> 00:19:27,742
We're supposed to be looking
for lamb, mechoui lamb.
387
00:19:30,377 --> 00:19:33,381
'We were on the hunt for
the best lamb in Marrakesh
388
00:19:33,406 --> 00:19:35,761
'after a tip-off
from our host in the desert.'
389
00:19:35,786 --> 00:19:37,582
How do know where to find it?
390
00:19:37,607 --> 00:19:39,662
It's in Mechoui Alley.
391
00:19:39,687 --> 00:19:42,042
OK, let's go.
And we have to ask for Mustapha.
392
00:19:42,067 --> 00:19:44,761
Mustapha?
Mustapha.
393
00:19:44,786 --> 00:19:47,472
Bonjour, Monsieur.
394
00:19:47,497 --> 00:19:49,352
Mustapha?
395
00:19:49,377 --> 00:19:51,072
Merck.
396
00:19:51,097 --> 00:19:53,222
Look, there's a sign there.
Mustapha.
397
00:19:53,247 --> 00:19:54,992
THEY SPEAK FRENCH
398
00:19:55,017 --> 00:19:57,042
Gordon. Gino.
399
00:19:57,067 --> 00:19:58,551
Hello. How are you doing?
400
00:19:58,576 --> 00:20:00,712
HE SPEAKS FRENCH
401
00:20:05,011 --> 00:20:08,808
He says we can try the
royal mechoui of Marrakesh here.
402
00:20:08,833 --> 00:20:11,688
'People come from miles around
for Mustapha's mechoui
403
00:20:11,713 --> 00:20:13,378
'or spit roast.
404
00:20:13,403 --> 00:20:15,918
'He slow-roasts the whole lamb
and sells up to 40 a day.'
405
00:20:17,833 --> 00:20:20,607
THEY SPEAK FRENCH
406
00:20:20,632 --> 00:20:23,407
It's 50 years he's been working here
doing the mechoui.
407
00:20:23,432 --> 00:20:27,477
His father and his grandfather
were here cooking mechoui.
408
00:20:27,502 --> 00:20:29,688
How'd you get a lamb
like that cooked?
409
00:20:29,713 --> 00:20:31,688
HE SPEAKS FRENCH
410
00:20:34,043 --> 00:20:36,048
They've got an oven.
Where?
411
00:20:36,073 --> 00:20:38,638
Just behind.
Stop it. Where?
412
00:20:38,663 --> 00:20:40,688
May I?
413
00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:49,378
Oh, my God. Wow.
414
00:20:49,403 --> 00:20:52,078
Two hours?
415
00:20:56,552 --> 00:20:58,558
Two hours?
416
00:20:58,583 --> 00:21:00,808
No salt, no spices.
417
00:21:00,833 --> 00:21:03,198
Nothing?
418
00:21:03,223 --> 00:21:05,888
There's about 12 lamb
419
00:21:05,913 --> 00:21:08,688
underneath in that oven there.
I'm hungry.
420
00:21:08,713 --> 00:21:11,718
Oh, my Lord. And what's
the seasoning there, what is it?
421
00:21:14,302 --> 00:21:16,378
HE SPEAKS FRENCH
422
00:21:16,403 --> 00:21:19,527
Oh, wow.
Don't put too much.
423
00:21:19,552 --> 00:21:21,888
What are you doing?
I don't need any seasoning.
424
00:21:21,913 --> 00:21:23,918
This looks incredible.
425
00:21:23,943 --> 00:21:25,918
Nice and flat.
426
00:21:27,583 --> 00:21:30,168
Oh, my God.
427
00:21:30,193 --> 00:21:33,048
FRED SPEAKS FRENCH
Delicious.
428
00:21:33,073 --> 00:21:35,088
Best lamb I had.
429
00:21:35,113 --> 00:21:37,128
Best lamb.
430
00:21:37,153 --> 00:21:39,657
Flaky. Simple.
431
00:21:39,682 --> 00:21:42,168
So tender and succulent.
432
00:21:42,193 --> 00:21:45,407
For me, you'd serve this
quality of lamb in a restaurant.
433
00:21:45,432 --> 00:21:47,888
I can see this on the menu
at the Savoy. Delicious.
434
00:21:47,913 --> 00:21:49,888
HE SPEAKS FRENCH
435
00:21:51,432 --> 00:21:54,607
He said he's so happy to meet
a proper chef for the first time.
436
00:21:54,632 --> 00:21:56,638
Let me pay.
437
00:21:56,663 --> 00:21:59,657
HE SPEAKS FRENCH
438
00:21:59,682 --> 00:22:01,808
GORDON SPEAKS FRENCH
439
00:22:01,833 --> 00:22:04,808
GINO SPEAKS ARABIC
440
00:22:04,833 --> 00:22:07,368
That has to be the best lamb
I've ever tasted.
441
00:22:07,393 --> 00:22:10,048
Better than anything
in Gino's Bar and Grill.
442
00:22:28,863 --> 00:22:30,888
I am going to make
443
00:22:30,913 --> 00:22:32,968
a beautiful mulled wine.
444
00:22:32,993 --> 00:22:35,918
I've got a few olives. What about
a nice tapenade with bruschetta?
445
00:22:35,943 --> 00:22:38,838
We're just having toast?
Olives on toast, that's it?
446
00:22:38,863 --> 00:22:40,888
It's tapenade on bruschetta.
447
00:22:40,913 --> 00:22:42,448
So black olives, green olives.
448
00:22:42,473 --> 00:22:44,888
Then fresh garlic.
449
00:22:44,913 --> 00:22:47,088
I put a touch of mint
and harissa paste.
450
00:22:47,113 --> 00:22:50,118
Thank you. Salute.
Salute.
451
00:22:50,143 --> 00:22:52,248
A slice of toast.
Let's relax.
452
00:22:54,583 --> 00:22:57,248
Nice.
Why is it so salty?
453
00:22:57,273 --> 00:22:59,448
It's not salty at all.
454
00:22:59,473 --> 00:23:03,018
That is salty as anything.
Take the criticism.
455
00:23:03,043 --> 00:23:06,607
As a chef, you just need
to know where to draw the line.
456
00:23:06,632 --> 00:23:09,477
It's salty.
I've got a present for you.
457
00:23:09,502 --> 00:23:11,477
What is it?
I got it in the market.
458
00:23:11,502 --> 00:23:14,638
For somebody who doesn't like
tapenade on bruschetta,
459
00:23:14,663 --> 00:23:16,888
you're doing quite well, aren't you?
460
00:23:16,913 --> 00:23:19,088
He always complains
when I cook something.
461
00:23:19,113 --> 00:23:21,638
Then he eats everything.
I think he's getting old, that guy.
462
00:23:21,663 --> 00:23:23,688
Well, he is 52.
463
00:23:23,713 --> 00:23:26,168
No, he's 53. Fuck me.
464
00:23:26,193 --> 00:23:28,198
HE LAUGHS
465
00:23:28,223 --> 00:23:30,277
Are you...
466
00:23:30,302 --> 00:23:32,998
Are you two...
Are you two for real?
467
00:23:33,023 --> 00:23:35,048
We are ready.
468
00:23:35,073 --> 00:23:38,168
LAUGHTER
469
00:23:38,193 --> 00:23:40,527
This reminds me of Christmas
on my house.
470
00:23:40,552 --> 00:23:42,477
Argument
and then we cuddle each other.
471
00:23:45,302 --> 00:23:47,638
CALL TO PRAYER
472
00:23:49,913 --> 00:23:52,998
MUSIC: 'jingle Bells'
473
00:23:53,023 --> 00:23:55,048
# Dashing through the snow
474
00:23:55,073 --> 00:23:56,998
# In a one-horse open sleigh
475
00:23:57,023 --> 00:23:59,048
# O'er the fields we go
476
00:23:59,073 --> 00:24:01,088
# Laughing all the way
477
00:24:01,113 --> 00:24:03,108
LAUGHTER
478
00:24:04,452 --> 00:24:07,018
Gordon, be careful of
that red light. It's flashing.
479
00:24:07,043 --> 00:24:09,048
But then it goes off again.
It's fine. Relax.
480
00:24:09,073 --> 00:24:12,407
How lucky are we to be here
in the middle of a saffron harvest?
481
00:24:12,432 --> 00:24:13,888
Ho-ho-ho.
482
00:24:13,913 --> 00:24:18,328
'Saffron can only be picked
for three weeks every year.
483
00:24:18,353 --> 00:24:21,968
'Today we are heading
to the Ourika Valley
484
00:24:21,993 --> 00:24:24,008
'in the foothills
of the Atlas mountains
485
00:24:24,033 --> 00:24:26,357
'for the harvest of the world's
most expensive spice.'
486
00:24:28,913 --> 00:24:31,088
Talking about expensive spices.
Yes.
487
00:24:31,113 --> 00:24:34,918
What has been your most expensive
488
00:24:34,943 --> 00:24:37,888
Christmas present that you received?
489
00:24:37,913 --> 00:24:39,918
My one, if I tell you,
you won't believe me.
490
00:24:39,943 --> 00:24:42,688
Go on.
My wife went to an auction
491
00:24:42,713 --> 00:24:44,328
for charity.
Yes.
492
00:24:44,353 --> 00:24:46,838
For £3,700,
493
00:24:46,863 --> 00:24:49,918
one pubic hair from Madonna.
494
00:24:49,943 --> 00:24:51,808
What?
495
00:24:51,833 --> 00:24:53,727
That's disgusting.
496
00:24:53,752 --> 00:24:56,277
It comes in a transparent box
in a nice frame.
497
00:24:56,302 --> 00:24:59,108
It's about this long.
What colour was it?
498
00:24:59,133 --> 00:25:01,108
It's a bit like your colour.
Blond?
499
00:25:01,133 --> 00:25:02,578
Well...
500
00:25:04,353 --> 00:25:06,808
It's come back on again.
Now it's gone back off again.
501
00:25:06,833 --> 00:25:08,838
The light.
What have you done?
502
00:25:08,863 --> 00:25:10,607
I don't know.
The red light has come on now.
503
00:25:10,632 --> 00:25:12,918
It says stop.
Don't go in the ditch.
504
00:25:12,943 --> 00:25:14,527
You're on the ditch.
505
00:25:14,552 --> 00:25:16,558
It said stop.
506
00:25:16,583 --> 00:25:18,758
Shit. Now it's fucked.
507
00:25:18,783 --> 00:25:20,397
Try and turn it on. Try.
508
00:25:20,422 --> 00:25:23,198
CLICKING
509
00:25:26,113 --> 00:25:28,268
Just lock it.
510
00:25:28,293 --> 00:25:30,218
See, we are here.
511
00:25:30,243 --> 00:25:32,168
And we need to get there.
512
00:25:32,193 --> 00:25:34,277
Right.
It's a flipping long way.
513
00:25:38,833 --> 00:25:41,368
We're supposed to be picking
saffron, and look at you two.
514
00:25:41,393 --> 00:25:43,888
Why are you going so fast?
Why? Cos I hate hanging around.
515
00:25:46,632 --> 00:25:49,448
Let's go for a light jog.
No. No.
516
00:25:51,033 --> 00:25:53,248
Come on, Gino.
My shoes are not good for that.
517
00:25:53,273 --> 00:25:55,918
What are you doing?
518
00:25:55,943 --> 00:25:57,558
LAUGHTER
519
00:25:57,583 --> 00:25:59,558
I'm doing the Italian jog.
520
00:26:01,502 --> 00:26:03,525
Oh, Gordon.
Yes.
521
00:26:03,550 --> 00:26:06,881
Look. The man with the donkey.
522
00:26:06,906 --> 00:26:09,881
Bonjour.
FRED SPEAKS ARABIC
523
00:26:12,106 --> 00:26:14,111
Hello.
524
00:26:14,136 --> 00:26:16,161
Gino.
525
00:26:16,186 --> 00:26:18,191
Now, see there?
526
00:26:18,216 --> 00:26:19,751
Look.
527
00:26:19,776 --> 00:26:21,751
Then left.
MAN SPEAKS ARABIC
528
00:26:21,776 --> 00:26:23,931
He said, yes, OK. Thank you.
529
00:26:23,956 --> 00:26:25,931
I'm gonna go there.
530
00:26:25,956 --> 00:26:28,001
Gino.
531
00:26:28,026 --> 00:26:30,001
Watch out, there's a goat
and three chickens.
532
00:26:30,026 --> 00:26:32,390
# Just hear
Those sleigh bells jingling
533
00:26:32,415 --> 00:26:35,520
# Ring-ting-tingling too
534
00:26:35,545 --> 00:26:37,801
# Come on, its lovely weather
535
00:26:37,826 --> 00:26:40,161
# For a sleigh ride
Together with you
536
00:26:40,186 --> 00:26:42,001
BLEATS
537
00:26:42,026 --> 00:26:44,321
"Come to Jerusalem
to celebrate Christmas with me."
538
00:26:44,346 --> 00:26:46,361
Really?
539
00:26:46,386 --> 00:26:48,441
We are together, right.
540
00:26:48,466 --> 00:26:50,470
We are together.
That's the most important thing.
541
00:26:50,495 --> 00:26:52,911
It's about being together
for Christmas.
542
00:26:52,936 --> 00:26:55,961
# Giddy up, giddy up, giddy up
Let's go
543
00:26:55,986 --> 00:26:58,831
# Let's look at the show
544
00:26:58,856 --> 00:27:02,161
In a sort of funny way,
I'm happy that the van broke down.
545
00:27:02,186 --> 00:27:03,801
Really? Why?
546
00:27:03,826 --> 00:27:06,520
Because we're never going
to experience something like this.
547
00:27:06,545 --> 00:27:09,321
It's like we've been back
2,000 years ago
548
00:27:09,346 --> 00:27:12,801
# We're gliding along with a song
549
00:27:12,826 --> 00:27:15,911
# Of a wintery fairyland
550
00:27:15,936 --> 00:27:18,961
You know the name of saffron
comes from the Arabic "zafaran",
551
00:27:18,986 --> 00:27:21,031
and it means "yellow".
552
00:27:21,056 --> 00:27:23,001
Some people say
it's effective as a stimulant
553
00:27:23,026 --> 00:27:25,470
for people who have ADHD.
What?
554
00:27:25,495 --> 00:27:27,681
People who are hyperactive
like Gordon.
555
00:27:27,706 --> 00:27:30,241
That's why I put saffron
in my coffee, that's why. Do you?
556
00:27:30,266 --> 00:27:32,241
Yes.
CHICKEN CLUCKS
557
00:27:32,266 --> 00:27:33,911
Are there any e995?
558
00:27:36,106 --> 00:27:38,081
Argh!
559
00:27:38,106 --> 00:27:40,131
CLUCKING
560
00:27:40,156 --> 00:27:42,131
Gino.
561
00:27:44,926 --> 00:27:47,821
Look, we're getting overtaken
by kids on bikes.
562
00:27:47,846 --> 00:27:50,410
Bonjour.
Merry Christmas. Really?
563
00:27:50,435 --> 00:27:52,461
I could walk faster.
564
00:27:52,486 --> 00:27:55,290
# Jiflg ling Ji"9- #
565
00:28:03,486 --> 00:28:05,381
How far now?
566
00:28:05,406 --> 00:28:07,691
Every time I move, this pin changes.
Oh, my God.
567
00:28:07,716 --> 00:28:10,381
Don't do that. I don't understand
what he says, either.
568
00:28:10,406 --> 00:28:13,211
'We're in the foothills
of Morocco's Atlas Mountains,
569
00:28:13,236 --> 00:28:16,051
'where, once again,
Gino the Genius has got us lost.
570
00:28:16,076 --> 00:28:17,971
'If we manage to find
the saffron farm,
571
00:28:17,996 --> 00:28:21,131
'I want to take some home and add
a twist to my Christmas stuffing.'
572
00:28:21,156 --> 00:28:23,660
Christmas day, do you have turkey?
I...
573
00:28:23,685 --> 00:28:26,021
hate turkey.
What?!
574
00:28:26,046 --> 00:28:30,490
I really dislike...
I really, really don't like turkey.
575
00:28:30,515 --> 00:28:33,331
You're not cooking it properly!
What do you mean I'm not cooking...
576
00:28:33,356 --> 00:28:34,841
I've tried many recipes.
577
00:28:34,866 --> 00:28:37,401
I've tried everything,
put the streaky bacon on top,
578
00:28:37,426 --> 00:28:40,151
put the butter between.
Baste, baste, baste.
579
00:28:40,176 --> 00:28:42,640
Yeah, but it's bland, it's dry!
It's not.
580
00:28:42,665 --> 00:28:44,760
And let it rest
for as long as you cook it.
581
00:28:47,506 --> 00:28:49,121
What about over there? Come on.
Bonjour!
582
00:28:49,146 --> 00:28:51,401
SPEAKS FRENCH
583
00:28:51,426 --> 00:28:53,430
SPEAKS FRENCH
584
00:28:53,455 --> 00:28:54,921
'Finally.'
585
00:28:59,096 --> 00:29:01,401
How are you, are you OK?
586
00:29:01,426 --> 00:29:02,991
Hi, I'm Fred.
587
00:29:03,016 --> 00:29:07,231
'Lynn Ducker moved to Morocco seven
years ago and started her farm,
588
00:29:07,256 --> 00:29:11,231
'Zahor Saffron, by hand-planting
eight tons of crocus bulbs.
589
00:29:11,256 --> 00:29:15,281
'She now produces some of the
highest-grade saffron in the world.'
590
00:29:15,306 --> 00:29:17,921
Is it one unique flower
591
00:29:17,946 --> 00:29:22,231
or can you get saffron from
different variety of flowers?
592
00:29:31,585 --> 00:29:34,841
Like a four-leaf clover.
593
00:29:34,866 --> 00:29:38,871
Why are they all women in the field?
594
00:29:38,896 --> 00:29:41,951
Women are more delicate. I mean,
look at his sausage fingers.
595
00:29:41,976 --> 00:29:43,921
LYNN LAUGHS
You could not pick up a saffron.
596
00:29:43,946 --> 00:29:46,071
The only things you can pick up
is a fillet steak.
597
00:29:46,096 --> 00:29:47,871
Trust me, I could pick up saffron.
598
00:29:50,306 --> 00:29:52,560
This one here?
599
00:29:52,585 --> 00:29:56,281
So beautiful. I've never
picked saffron before, ever.
600
00:29:56,306 --> 00:29:59,991
# I'm just mad about saffron
601
00:30:00,016 --> 00:30:03,791
# And saffron's mad about me. #
602
00:30:06,226 --> 00:30:08,481
So that's what makes it
so expensive?
603
00:30:08,506 --> 00:30:13,591
'A gram of saffron contains 500
threads and can sell for up to £75,
604
00:30:13,616 --> 00:30:15,961
'making it more expensive
than gold.'
605
00:30:15,986 --> 00:30:19,041
# They call me mellow yellow
606
00:30:19,066 --> 00:30:20,871
# Quite right
607
00:30:20,896 --> 00:30:23,791
# They call me mellow yellow. #
608
00:30:23,816 --> 00:30:26,281
Gino!
What?
609
00:30:26,306 --> 00:30:28,871
Stay in your lane! There is no
flowers in there. Stay...
610
00:30:28,896 --> 00:30:31,560
You're not looking properly.
Look at the flowers you're missing.
611
00:30:31,585 --> 00:30:33,760
You can't just pick
different people's lanes.
612
00:30:33,785 --> 00:30:36,231
Guys, can I just let you know
there are some ladies
613
00:30:36,256 --> 00:30:37,991
that are working in silence.
614
00:30:38,016 --> 00:30:40,510
If people were screaming like this
in your kitchen, Gordon...
615
00:30:40,535 --> 00:30:42,760
He's jumping over lanes,
you need to complete the lane.
616
00:30:42,785 --> 00:30:45,071
You can't just go
where the flowers are, look!
617
00:30:45,096 --> 00:30:46,841
I'm not deaf,
you don't have to shout.
618
00:30:46,866 --> 00:30:48,711
Hello.
619
00:30:48,736 --> 00:30:49,991
Can I take yours?
620
00:30:56,426 --> 00:30:57,680
CLEARS THROAT
621
00:30:57,705 --> 00:31:00,841
One second, I need another
tray, guys.
622
00:31:00,866 --> 00:31:02,401
Excuse me,
you stole from the ladies!
623
00:31:02,426 --> 00:31:04,991
You just went to the girl
over there. There is... No, no.
624
00:31:05,016 --> 00:31:07,591
I have been breaking my back here
and that's all I got.
625
00:31:07,616 --> 00:31:09,760
I haven't been talking.
Well, you're too slow.
626
00:31:09,785 --> 00:31:11,560
And you are a cheater.
627
00:31:13,896 --> 00:31:18,560
Is it true that saffron... uh
makes your willy go like ping!
628
00:31:18,585 --> 00:31:20,760
LAUGHS
629
00:31:24,455 --> 00:31:26,591
OK.
630
00:31:26,616 --> 00:31:28,041
That's a nice sidecar.
631
00:31:28,066 --> 00:31:29,841
That's a nice one?
632
00:31:29,866 --> 00:31:33,121
Salaam alaikum. Bonjour.
633
00:31:33,146 --> 00:31:36,601
'These Berber ladies extract a
staggering two million red threads
634
00:31:36,626 --> 00:31:39,991
'every harvest.
Worth around £30,000.'
635
00:31:41,376 --> 00:31:43,401
I feel very relaxed being here.
636
00:31:43,426 --> 00:31:45,871
You can hear the bees,
it's very quiet and calm.
637
00:31:49,535 --> 00:31:52,430
Why?
638
00:31:54,896 --> 00:31:57,420
Now I understand
why it's so expensive,
639
00:31:57,445 --> 00:31:59,391
because it's so time-consuming
640
00:31:59,416 --> 00:32:01,781
and you need to have
all these hands working.
641
00:32:01,806 --> 00:32:04,550
My God, what a labour of love
this is.
642
00:32:04,575 --> 00:32:08,300
I have a four... strand.
643
00:32:10,336 --> 00:32:13,141
One, two, three, four.
644
00:32:13,166 --> 00:32:15,831
That means... good luck.
645
00:32:18,856 --> 00:32:20,620
You've just ruined my Christmas.
LAUGHTER
646
00:32:20,645 --> 00:32:22,420
I was all excited and then boom.
647
00:32:25,496 --> 00:32:28,581
I'm scared, Gordon!
GORDON CHEERS
648
00:32:31,606 --> 00:32:34,391
'With our camper out of fuel,
I've 'borrowed'
649
00:32:34,416 --> 00:32:36,781
'this vintage Russian
motorbike and sidecar
650
00:32:36,806 --> 00:32:38,261
'to get us back to Marrakesh.'
651
00:32:40,286 --> 00:32:41,951
I can't see the map!
652
00:32:41,976 --> 00:32:43,581
'If we can find it, that is.'
653
00:32:49,726 --> 00:32:51,750
Turn right.
Gino, it's not right.
654
00:32:51,775 --> 00:32:53,261
Yes, it is right!
No, it's not.
655
00:32:53,286 --> 00:32:55,061
Look. That's where Marrakesh is.
656
00:32:56,445 --> 00:32:58,221
Shit.
657
00:32:58,246 --> 00:33:01,261
Guys, I lost the piece
that says Marrakesh.
658
00:33:01,286 --> 00:33:03,061
Seriously?
659
00:33:03,086 --> 00:33:04,701
Excuse me!
660
00:33:04,726 --> 00:33:06,311
FRED WHISTLES
661
00:33:06,336 --> 00:33:08,981
Salaam alaikum.
Excuse me, bonjour.
662
00:33:09,006 --> 00:33:11,191
Marrakesh?
Marrakesh?
663
00:33:11,216 --> 00:33:12,471
Back that way?
Over there.
664
00:33:12,496 --> 00:33:14,670
Fucking hell.
Thank you.
665
00:33:14,695 --> 00:33:17,420
He looks German!
LAUGHTER
666
00:33:22,006 --> 00:33:24,981
We need to go right, now.
Are you sure this is the way?
667
00:33:25,006 --> 00:33:26,750
That's what
the navigation system said.
668
00:33:30,806 --> 00:33:35,111
GINO SPEAKS ITALIAN
669
00:33:35,136 --> 00:33:37,341
I'm gonna die in Morocco.
I don't want to die.
670
00:33:38,856 --> 00:33:41,831
What the fuck?
Ooh, la, la.
671
00:33:41,856 --> 00:33:45,111
It was a stupid idea
with this three-wheeled car.
672
00:33:45,136 --> 00:33:46,620
My nuts. Ooh!
673
00:33:46,645 --> 00:33:50,341
I think we've got lost.
Right, there's a village there.
674
00:33:57,166 --> 00:34:00,500
Slow down, there's goats everywhere.
Oh! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
675
00:34:00,525 --> 00:34:04,571
Stop, stop, stop, stop.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
676
00:34:04,596 --> 00:34:06,800
GOATS BLEAT
Salaam alaikum.
677
00:34:06,825 --> 00:34:08,931
Here. Allez, allez.
678
00:34:08,956 --> 00:34:11,371
Allez, let's go! Beep beep.
679
00:34:11,396 --> 00:34:13,681
GORDON LAUGHS
Which way to Marrakesh?
680
00:34:13,706 --> 00:34:14,881
Follow the sheeps!
681
00:34:14,906 --> 00:34:17,931
FRED SPEAKS FRENCH
682
00:34:17,956 --> 00:34:20,400
Marrakesh?
683
00:34:20,425 --> 00:34:23,761
Come on, jump up!
LAUGHTER
684
00:34:23,786 --> 00:34:25,931
Jump! Jump!
685
00:34:25,956 --> 00:34:27,241
EXCLAIMS
686
00:34:27,266 --> 00:34:29,921
LAUGHTER
687
00:34:31,866 --> 00:34:34,041
SCREAMS
688
00:34:34,066 --> 00:34:36,121
LAUGHS
689
00:34:36,146 --> 00:34:38,921
Come on, come on!
This is very dangerous!
690
00:34:40,596 --> 00:34:45,371
My bum!
Two hours of this to Marrakesh!
691
00:34:45,396 --> 00:34:46,811
BEEPS
Two hours!
692
00:34:46,836 --> 00:34:51,041
# We three Kings
of a three-wheeled car!
693
00:34:51,066 --> 00:34:54,841
# Bearing gifts
We travel so far
694
00:34:54,866 --> 00:34:59,400
# Red and gold
And thought we are in Jordan!
695
00:34:59,425 --> 00:35:03,171
# Follow the yonder star... #
696
00:35:03,196 --> 00:35:05,730
Jordan?
MAKES RANDOM NOISES
697
00:35:19,116 --> 00:35:21,730
Normally, I'd be putting the turkey
in, this time in the morning.
698
00:35:21,755 --> 00:35:24,241
What would you be doing?
I watch Only Fools And Horses.
699
00:35:24,266 --> 00:35:27,011
Christmas Day morning? You don't
help with the cooking? Not really.
700
00:35:27,036 --> 00:35:30,091
Oh, I love that programme.
I watch Only Fools And Horses,
701
00:35:30,116 --> 00:35:32,371
I sit there,
with a packet of cheese puff.
702
00:35:32,396 --> 00:35:33,730
I like cheese puff.
703
00:35:35,625 --> 00:35:37,811
'After our rough ride
back to Marrakesh,
704
00:35:37,836 --> 00:35:40,451
'we've enjoyed a night
of relative luxury
705
00:35:40,476 --> 00:35:43,451
'in a traditional riad guest house
in the medieval Medina.'
706
00:35:43,476 --> 00:35:45,011
Smell?
707
00:35:45,036 --> 00:35:47,730
Oh, wow.
Delicious.
708
00:35:47,755 --> 00:35:50,451
I'm gonna go crazy on the saffron.
Oh, you're generous.
709
00:35:50,476 --> 00:35:54,291
'I'm laying on a festive feast
with a distinctive Moroccan flavour
710
00:35:54,316 --> 00:35:55,931
'for the three of us.'
711
00:35:55,956 --> 00:35:59,321
I think it is great to have
this dish in Morocco, the tangia.
712
00:35:59,346 --> 00:36:01,211
Everything in one pot,
nice and easy.
713
00:36:01,236 --> 00:36:04,041
The fascinating thing
about THIS tangia,
714
00:36:04,066 --> 00:36:07,881
with that saffron and that butter,
it doesn't need stock.
715
00:36:07,906 --> 00:36:10,201
'The centrepiece of the meal
is a beef tangia,
716
00:36:10,226 --> 00:36:12,961
'a dish that takes its name
from the urn-shaped pot
717
00:36:12,986 --> 00:36:14,681
'that it's cooked in
718
00:36:14,706 --> 00:36:16,841
'and traditionally prepared
by the man of the house.
719
00:36:16,866 --> 00:36:18,650
'Naturally, that means me.'
720
00:36:18,675 --> 00:36:22,241
Do you have, like a...
like a Christmas, you know...?
721
00:36:22,266 --> 00:36:24,961
Ho-ho-ho, jingle my bells.
722
00:36:24,986 --> 00:36:27,811
Oh, Christmas day morning?
I have a busy day Christmas Day.
723
00:36:27,836 --> 00:36:29,371
LAUGHS
724
00:36:29,396 --> 00:36:33,091
My sous chef needs to get his mind
out the gutter and onto the veg.
725
00:36:33,116 --> 00:36:36,650
I'm just massaging all the spices
and the oil into the cauliflower,
726
00:36:36,675 --> 00:36:39,451
so you get a fantastic colour
and flavour.
727
00:36:39,476 --> 00:36:41,400
Right, tangia ready,
beetroot's ready.
728
00:36:41,425 --> 00:36:44,121
Hot roasted cauliflower, done.
729
00:36:44,146 --> 00:36:47,451
Now, this is gonna cook
in a unique way. Let's go.
730
00:36:47,476 --> 00:36:48,931
I need to wash my hand first.
731
00:36:51,956 --> 00:36:54,681
Before we can eat,
I need to find the oven.
732
00:36:56,066 --> 00:36:58,011
We couldn't be any deeper
in the souk.
733
00:36:58,036 --> 00:37:01,730
This is where all the locals come
for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
734
00:37:05,144 --> 00:37:06,559
Which way?
Left, left, left, left.
735
00:37:09,034 --> 00:37:10,319
Is it here?
Come here.
736
00:37:10,344 --> 00:37:13,478
Are you sure
we are in the right place?
737
00:37:13,503 --> 00:37:14,518
B0njour!
738
00:37:16,034 --> 00:37:18,478
Bonjour. Salaam alaikum.
739
00:37:18,503 --> 00:37:21,398
Come down, come down.
Now, this is the oven.
740
00:37:21,423 --> 00:37:24,159
Ohh!
Feel that heat? Shit, that's hot.
741
00:37:24,184 --> 00:37:26,319
Beetroot, there.
742
00:37:26,344 --> 00:37:27,959
Just shuffle...
743
00:37:27,984 --> 00:37:32,518
I love this country, it's like we
are going back to biblical time!
744
00:37:32,543 --> 00:37:35,959
'These ancient community ovens
can be found all over the Medina,
745
00:37:35,984 --> 00:37:39,369
'as most people who live here
don't have one at home.'
746
00:37:39,394 --> 00:37:42,478
Whilst that's cooking slowly,
we're gonna have a hammam.
747
00:37:42,503 --> 00:37:46,159
What's a hammam?
It's like a medieval spa, Gino.
748
00:37:46,184 --> 00:37:50,679
See those pipes? This generates
all the steam into that hammam.
749
00:37:50,704 --> 00:37:54,478
Traditionally, they would come here,
drop this off on Thursday night,
750
00:37:54,503 --> 00:37:57,319
pick it up Friday morning
and literally have a hammam
751
00:37:57,344 --> 00:37:59,759
in order to be super clean,
ready for a prayer day.
752
00:37:59,784 --> 00:38:01,089
And it's all men?
753
00:38:01,114 --> 00:38:03,598
Of course it's all men!
Time to bond. Come on.
754
00:38:03,623 --> 00:38:06,199
Here, men, you know, they are very
affectionate with each other.
755
00:38:06,224 --> 00:38:09,449
Very intimate. They held hands and
they do all these things together,
756
00:38:09,474 --> 00:38:11,799
they cook the tangia,
they go to the hammam. Exactly.
757
00:38:13,904 --> 00:38:15,679
You have no hair on your chest.
758
00:38:15,704 --> 00:38:18,598
I know I've got no fucking hair
on my chest, I'm not a hairy person.
759
00:38:18,623 --> 00:38:21,679
You don't have any hair!
Stop nipping it.
760
00:38:21,704 --> 00:38:22,759
You wax?
761
00:38:22,784 --> 00:38:24,518
No, I don't wax!
762
00:38:24,543 --> 00:38:26,759
You shave?
No, I don't shave!
763
00:38:26,784 --> 00:38:29,009
Do you use cream instead?
764
00:38:29,034 --> 00:38:30,759
Cream?!
765
00:38:31,954 --> 00:38:33,909
What's wrong with you two?
766
00:38:36,224 --> 00:38:39,518
GREETINGS
767
00:38:39,543 --> 00:38:42,009
This is beautiful.
768
00:38:42,034 --> 00:38:44,239
That's for me?
769
00:38:45,503 --> 00:38:48,209
'A full body exfoliation
and massage,
770
00:38:48,234 --> 00:38:51,909
'the perfect Christmas treat
for metrosexual men like us.'
771
00:39:00,394 --> 00:39:02,319
He's taking off my skin!
772
00:39:03,704 --> 00:39:07,119
# I feel it in my fingers
SCREAMS
773
00:39:07,144 --> 00:39:11,598
# I feel it in my toes
GROANS
774
00:39:11,623 --> 00:39:14,879
GROANS
775
00:39:14,904 --> 00:39:17,728
# Christmas is all around me
GROANING
776
00:39:17,753 --> 00:39:20,598
# And so the feeling grows
PANTS
777
00:39:20,623 --> 00:39:23,319
Oooohhhhh!
778
00:39:23,344 --> 00:39:26,089
# So if you really love Christmas
779
00:39:26,114 --> 00:39:29,439
# Come on and let it snow
780
00:39:29,464 --> 00:39:33,239
Ah. Oh. Ah! Ooh!
781
00:39:33,264 --> 00:39:37,289
# Come on and let it show! #
782
00:39:37,314 --> 00:39:39,839
SHRIEKS
783
00:39:42,064 --> 00:39:45,239
I have to say, Gordon, I don't think
that this is your best idea.
784
00:40:00,317 --> 00:40:02,162
Hand me another plate, please.
785
00:40:03,987 --> 00:40:06,401
Perfect. This looks good, man.
786
00:40:06,426 --> 00:40:09,521
You know what's nice about
celebrating Christmas here, Gino?
787
00:40:09,546 --> 00:40:12,082
Look, you got the mosque everywhere.
788
00:40:12,107 --> 00:40:15,242
Every three or four hours,
they call people for prayer.
789
00:40:15,267 --> 00:40:19,322
This is as far as you can get from
Christmas and, yet, here we are.
790
00:40:19,347 --> 00:40:22,882
Look. Look at this table,
look at this shirt. I'm ready.
791
00:40:29,387 --> 00:40:32,962
Are we gonna have a drink or what?
Yeah, I've got it all prepared.
792
00:40:34,957 --> 00:40:37,932
Ah, that looks beautiful, Fred.
Thank you, Gordon. Now...
793
00:40:37,957 --> 00:40:40,442
Now... this is the moment.
794
00:40:40,467 --> 00:40:42,112
I'm looking forward to this.
795
00:40:42,137 --> 00:40:45,521
The smell of this...
Ohhhh!
796
00:40:45,546 --> 00:40:49,491
Now that is what I call
a Moroccan tangia.
797
00:40:49,516 --> 00:40:52,592
Look at the colour!
Beautiful.
798
00:40:53,727 --> 00:40:55,952
'As well as my succulent
beef tangia,
799
00:40:55,977 --> 00:40:58,182
'flavoured with saffron
and preserved lemon,
800
00:40:58,207 --> 00:40:59,952
'our Christmas spread includes
801
00:40:59,977 --> 00:41:02,671
'Gino's slow-roasted beetroot
and goats cheese salad,
802
00:41:02,696 --> 00:41:04,491
'drizzled with honey.'
That's it!
803
00:41:04,516 --> 00:41:09,022
'And a mountain of steamed seasonal
vegetables on a bed of couscous.
804
00:41:09,047 --> 00:41:13,462
'Fresh herbs and spices infuse
every dish with Moroccan magic.'
805
00:41:13,487 --> 00:41:15,952
Guys, it wouldn't be Christmas
without a tipple.
806
00:41:15,977 --> 00:41:19,342
This is called A Desert Crossing.
807
00:41:19,367 --> 00:41:21,182
Cauliflower smells delicious.
808
00:41:21,207 --> 00:41:23,342
15ml of saffron liquor...
809
00:41:23,367 --> 00:41:26,671
and about 15ml of gin.
810
00:41:26,696 --> 00:41:29,081
That's enough, thank you.
The champagne...
811
00:41:29,106 --> 00:41:30,669
We're listening, we're listening.
812
00:41:30,694 --> 00:41:34,340
And 10ml of lemon.
Nice.
813
00:41:34,365 --> 00:41:38,900
Here you are. Gordon.
A Desert Crossing for you.
814
00:41:38,925 --> 00:41:41,460
A Desert Crossing, thank you.
For you, mon ami.
815
00:41:41,485 --> 00:41:43,669
Love the colour.
Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas!
816
00:41:43,694 --> 00:41:44,950
Taste the tangia.
Yes.
817
00:41:44,975 --> 00:41:47,310
Close your eyes...
Oh, beautiful.
818
00:41:47,335 --> 00:41:49,489
...and put that tangia
in your mouth.
819
00:41:49,514 --> 00:41:52,100
What comes to mind?
First impressions? OK...
820
00:41:54,155 --> 00:41:55,310
Super tender.
821
00:41:55,335 --> 00:41:59,980
Must be because all the spices, must
be because of the slow cooking. Mm.
822
00:42:00,005 --> 00:42:03,310
Now, I want you to do exactly
the same with the cauliflower,
823
00:42:03,335 --> 00:42:04,850
close your eyes.
824
00:42:06,005 --> 00:42:07,669
Put it on my fork?
Yeah.
825
00:42:07,694 --> 00:42:08,669
Ready?
826
00:42:10,845 --> 00:42:11,900
SCREAMS
827
00:42:11,925 --> 00:42:14,130
LAUGHTER
828
00:42:14,155 --> 00:42:17,230
I'm missing my wife!
GORDON LAUGHS
829
00:42:17,255 --> 00:42:19,260
# Underneath the mistletoe... #
830
00:42:19,285 --> 00:42:23,510
'What a Christmas feast,
everything was just exceptional.
831
00:42:23,535 --> 00:42:28,180
'It was different, but one of the
best that I personally had.'
832
00:42:28,205 --> 00:42:30,590
Pull the cracker. Ready?
Three, two, one.
833
00:42:30,615 --> 00:42:34,340
Make sure the quiff
is above the crown. Let's see.
834
00:42:34,365 --> 00:42:36,619
Goes, I wanna play a game.
Who Am I?
835
00:42:36,644 --> 00:42:38,820
I play that with my kids
all the time.
836
00:42:38,845 --> 00:42:42,020
So, what we do,
we write a name on our hat
837
00:42:42,045 --> 00:42:44,489
and the others are going to try
and guess what we've written.
838
00:42:44,514 --> 00:42:46,310
Can I go first?
All right.
839
00:42:46,335 --> 00:42:48,980
I'll write one on and this
one is going on Gino.
840
00:42:49,005 --> 00:42:50,340
Got it?
Yep.
841
00:42:50,365 --> 00:42:51,700
That's it.
OK.
842
00:42:51,725 --> 00:42:53,820
Old or young?
843
00:42:55,535 --> 00:42:56,590
LAUGHTER
844
00:42:56,615 --> 00:42:58,180
What... What, who is...?
845
00:42:58,205 --> 00:43:00,310
I used to be in love with her
when I was a boy. OK.
846
00:43:01,845 --> 00:43:04,020
LAUGHS
847
00:43:04,045 --> 00:43:07,020
What was that?
OK, OK, OK. Wait. Yeah?
848
00:43:09,285 --> 00:43:10,340
LAUGHS
849
00:43:10,365 --> 00:43:11,700
Big knockers?
Yes!
850
00:43:11,725 --> 00:43:13,980
Big boobies. Yes!
Pamela Anderson!
851
00:43:14,005 --> 00:43:16,980
Well done, that's a good one.
OK, now, your turn.
852
00:43:17,005 --> 00:43:19,310
This is one of my real heroes.
853
00:43:19,335 --> 00:43:20,789
OK?
Yes.
854
00:43:20,814 --> 00:43:23,180
Male or female?
Uh... male.
855
00:43:23,205 --> 00:43:25,950
Um... Italian?
He wishes.
856
00:43:25,975 --> 00:43:27,770
OK, uh...
857
00:43:27,795 --> 00:43:30,060
OK, let me, I'll help you out.
858
00:43:30,085 --> 00:43:33,060
LONDON ACCENT: All right, mate,
so, uh, this is how you do it,
859
00:43:33,085 --> 00:43:34,869
you just put a few nuts...
860
00:43:34,894 --> 00:43:37,900
Oi, pukka. That is pukka!
Jamie Oliver!
861
00:43:37,925 --> 00:43:41,260
Yes!
LAUGHTER
862
00:43:41,285 --> 00:43:43,900
Cheers!
Salute. Salute.
863
00:43:43,925 --> 00:43:46,100
This cocktail's amazing,
by the way.
864
00:43:46,125 --> 00:43:48,310
Thank you.
It's going to my head.
865
00:43:48,335 --> 00:43:49,869
'Magical.'
866
00:43:49,894 --> 00:43:52,869
It doesn't really matter
where you are.
867
00:43:52,894 --> 00:43:58,060
If you are with the right people,
you gonna have a hell of a time.
868
00:43:58,085 --> 00:44:00,869
That's fantastic!
How beautiful is that?
869
00:44:00,894 --> 00:44:03,340
What a week we've just had.
870
00:44:03,365 --> 00:44:06,180
I've experienced things that
I've never, ever dreamt of before.
871
00:44:06,205 --> 00:44:08,869
My favourite part
was when we went to see the family
872
00:44:08,894 --> 00:44:10,409
in the middle of the desert.
873
00:44:10,434 --> 00:44:14,869
They shared everything with us
and this is the spirit of Christmas.
874
00:44:14,894 --> 00:44:17,869
It took me forever to find these,
Gordon.
875
00:44:17,894 --> 00:44:19,409
Where did you get the size?
876
00:44:19,434 --> 00:44:22,820
'It's been an amazing
Moroccan Christmas week.'
877
00:44:22,845 --> 00:44:24,700
Of course, I love the boys,
878
00:44:24,725 --> 00:44:28,980
but my real Christmas
starts tomorrow with my family.
879
00:44:35,514 --> 00:44:36,980
Oh... Good idea, Gino.
880
00:44:38,535 --> 00:44:40,050
What are you doing?!
881
00:44:40,075 --> 00:44:42,260
Trying to get a song that we know.
882
00:44:42,285 --> 00:44:44,460
I...
Be patient.
883
00:44:44,485 --> 00:44:46,820
MUSIC: 'Driving Home For Christmas'
by Chris Rea
884
00:44:51,644 --> 00:44:53,340
Beautiful!
885
00:44:53,365 --> 00:44:57,659
ALL: # Driving home for Christmas
886
00:44:57,684 --> 00:45:02,180
# I can't wait to see those faces
887
00:45:02,205 --> 00:45:03,869
Woo hoo!
888
00:45:03,894 --> 00:45:07,300
# Driving home for Christmas
889
00:45:09,644 --> 00:45:11,820
MUMBLING WORDS
890
00:45:11,845 --> 00:45:15,539
Yeah, me too,
I don't know the words!
891
00:45:15,564 --> 00:45:19,770
Come on!
# Driving home for Christmas...
892
00:45:19,795 --> 00:45:22,230
Listen, I need to ask you something,
it's been bothering me.
893
00:45:22,255 --> 00:45:24,020
Where are we gonna go next?
894
00:45:24,045 --> 00:45:26,380
Do you want to know?
Yes!
895
00:45:26,405 --> 00:45:28,900
Guess what, guys?
Go on.
896
00:45:28,925 --> 00:45:31,300
We're going to-
HORN BEEPS
897
00:45:31,325 --> 00:45:33,460
CHEERING
No way!
898
00:45:33,485 --> 00:45:36,050
# Driving home for Christmas. #
899
00:45:36,075 --> 00:45:38,050
Subtitles by ITV signpost
65636
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.