Original subtitles

-That's crazy, man. -There's not gonna be any survivors.

Awesome guy, right?

Awesome.

Shit, I'm feeling pretty off.

-I feel like going home. -What's wrong?

I didn't get much sleep last night.

I'm just knackered.

-I'm going home. -What, now?

-Yeah, but I'll see you at home. -I'll be back a bit later.

Joanna?

-...why you don't want to come? -I'm not camping outside.

-It's not camping, it's glamping. -That's not me. No, I'm not coming.

-Look at it! -It's so beautiful. I will try!

No, I'm having this...

Fuck's sake. You're fine.

-Yeah? -Yeah. You're all right.

I can't. I can't.

Stop!

I was thinking, do you wanna come tomorrow night to the event?

As a representative of the target group.

Yeah. Yeah, I'd love to.

Okay, great.

You can bring Mario, if you like. I'd love to meet him.

Yeah, sure. I'll ask him.

Good.

Yes, mum. Yes, but what the hell can I...

Yes, but I... Yes, you say that every time.

No, I know.

Mm. No, but what the hell...

But I can't just... Yes, but I don't want to do that.

No, I won't. Just listen to me, will you?

No, I get that. Yeah.

Yes, but could you... Okay! Yeah, I hear you!

No, that's not how it is. No, it isn't.

No, I'm telling you it isn't.

Yes, but...

Okay. Yes, but I'm not gonna do that. No, I won't.

-Everything alright? -Yeah, what do you mean?

-Is something wrong? -Things are just a bit chaotic.

What is chaotic?

My dad, but it's no big deal.

Alright. But...

Come out later, if you want. I made toast, if you want some.

I'll be out later.

Fuck it...

-I can't take it any more. -What's going on?

He's been calling me all fucking night

like some fucking lunatic.

He sent a thousand fucking texts. That don't even make any sense.

What does he want?

He went to Thailand a couple of years ago.

Started up a business, that went completely bust.

Now he's broke, so he wants me to get hold of some cash from mum.

See, this is what he does.

I don't hear a word from him for months,

and then he phones out of the blue in the middle of the night,

totally wasted,

roaring about money and how it's my responsibility to help him.

And he writes things like... I mean, just look at this.

So I get upset and call mum.

And then she's furious and gives out to me for even talking to my dad.

And I have to listen to all her bullshit

about how she thinks he's fucked her life up.

-I just can't deal with it any more. -But he didn't mean this.

-He's wasted. -Who knows.

You know, truth is I don't care what he says.

I don't give a shit any more, but...

what upsets me is

this constant war between them,

and the chaos that's been going on my whole life, and I...

feel so... ugly.

Their fighting makes me ugly. And totally...

emotionally retarded or something.

I mean, I don't even know how to...

I don't know how...

Come on, that's not true.

That's how I feel.

So...

-How are things with you? -Ah, you know... Alright.

-Were you with the MILF? -Yeah.

Nice, or what?

It was nice.

-Does Siri know? -No.

We haven't talked in a while, so...

-You made toast? -Yes.

Want some?

Hey...

You know what would be really cosy?

No.

What?

Grab the duvet, will you?

No, you've got to move it over there.

-Put it on the sofa? -Here, alright?

Talk about cosiness factor.

Alright.

-It's symmetrical and everything. -It's perfection.

Okay! Off we go, in we go. Oh, help...

Fuck's sake, not in here. Come on...

-No! Come back here. Stay. -Ew... Fuck!

-It's okay... -Leave me alone! Damn it...

Sorry, mate...

Very fancy.

Cheers.

-Thank you.

-So where is she? -I don't know.

-Text her. -No, I don't want to seem too keen.

-Let's just hang out for a while. -Alright.

MESSAGES SIRI

-Wait here, I just need to... -Yes.

-Hey. -Do you have a thing with her?

No, why are you stalking people I work with on Insta?

Come on David, if you do, just tell me, so that I...

Why would she post a picture like that?

How the hell should I know?

She's just some random girl I work with.

We took that photo at a bar after work.

Fuck knows why she posted it now.

-So you're not with her now? -No, I'm with Mario.

-Okay, just you and him? -Yes, what the hell! Stop it now.

I don't know, I just...

-I don't know. -Talk soon, okay?

-Goodbye. -Bye.

What do you think?

Yeah.

I think it looks good. Yeah.

But...

I'm not sure about the CF2F steel beams.

You would have gone with the C55?

Yeah, I think so.

-You look great. -Well, thanks.

So do you.

So... Off we go.

-Yeah? -Yeah.

-I thought Mario was coming. -He's here somewhere.

-Okay. -I don't know...

-Well, hello ladies... Hi! -Congratulations.

-This is David, this is... -Hi, David.

If you're happy, we're happy. That's how I feel.

Well, hello. How are you?

-How are you? -Thank you so much for coming.

-Thank you. -It gets better every year. Exactly.

...like a green background, but the light is too obvious,

the colour around the edges.

Well, David. Here's Angela.

Hey Joanna! Nice to see you.

You look phenomenal. You're showing us all up.

Hey.

-Hey, darling. How are you doing? -Yeah, good. Very good.

-David, this is... Liam. -Hi.

-The boss man. -David! Nice to meet you.

-And the wife. -Hi. Maurice.

David, you had a chance to look around?

Yeah. It looks awesome. Yeah.

I don't know much about architecture, but...

Yeah, I like the vibe. It kind of reminds me of the Stark Tower.

-That is a refreshing reference. -You love that, don't you?

Thank you!

Hello, everybody. Pardon my absence. Mario.

-Joanna. Nice to meet you. -Very nice to meet you.

-Heard a lot about you. -Likewise.

-Mario. -Hi. Liam.

-Nice to meet you, I'm Mario. -Maurice. Hi.

-Nice to meet you. -Please, join us.

Thank you! I'm David's hotelier.

-Flatmate. We live together. -We live together, yeah.

So what have we been doing?

You're the masterminds, the creators of the Spears, right?

The Spear. Just the one erection, that's mine.

The Spear? Right. The Spears, completely different field.

-Very different. -Yeah.

Could be your next project though. The Britney Bitch.

Oh my God, we could have a giant vulva in the city centre.

Never mind your spear. You know, like a vulva there...

That would be gold. Living in a giant pussy.

Can you imagine if we had...

That's when I'll know that I made it, if we had a giant vagina

on the London map, called the Britney Bitch.

Sign me up, I'd live there.

-It's your project. -We've got our first one.

-Deal. -Done.

Good luck.

You find the money. Done. Yeah, exactly.

So, what's the vibe?

What's going on? What happens now?

-That's pretty much it here. -Yeah.

I hear you. But the night, it's still young.

So if I say after-party our place,

you say, "Let's order a fucking cab".

Yes, right!

I mean, we have tonnes of free champagne from your event.

Free champagne that I'm supplying, so I'm sponsoring the after-party.

I'm happy you offer, that's nice of you.

-I'll sponsor with a cab ride. -Let's order a fucking cab.

-No, no. -Yes!

-No. -Right. Deal? Done, deal?

I'll do anything for a cab ride.

-Ah, nice. -Go on.

-Okay, we're doing this. -Before I change my mind.

Nice. Okay. Cab ride and free champagne.

-Done. Fine. -Nice!

Okay, let's do this.

Hello, darling. We'll be grabbing some.

And one for the ride.

Thank you.

-It's actually my mother's. -Mummy's boy, are you?

I'm a mummy's boy. Who isn't?

-Straight down? -Yeah, go down, check it out.

-Mum does the cooking, does she? -Alright, so...

It's so tidy, I'm impressed.

Hah, what the hell is that?

Haha, Mario!

-So what's going on here? -It's obviously the Britney Bitch.

That's why you guys are here tonight,

to check it out and get some advice...

-Ah, you're pitching! That's good. -Is there room in a womb?

Let's make Britney glow.

-Make her glow. -Fire Britney up.

-Make Britney glow. -There we go.

That's where I'm...

You want to see chopped dicks flying around, I get it...

-This is it. -Yeah, this is it.

I like what you have done with the place.

Thank you.

Okay... You've gone for the minimalist look.

Yeah, that's what I went for.

Yeah. Nailed it.

But you have invested in a scented candle.

It was actually Mario who bought it for me, so....

-You didn't even buy it? -No.

-What... lavender? -Yeah.

-Okay, charming. -It smells really nice.

-I haven't lit it up though... -No, clearly.

Saving it for a special occasion.

Okay, so how do we do this in your virtual world?

-Can you taste? -Well, here's the beauty of it.

-Do you want to taste? -How do you savour?

Yes.

You can completely structure and weave

your own reality, however you want it.

If you've got dark tendencies, how does that then work in this...

-I don't know, like... -You're the expert, tell us! Yeah.

-Well, I guess... -If I like to hurt small children...

Yeah, but that's a good thing then. If you...

Like, all the bad people can do bad stuff, and don't hurt anyone.

-No crime... -But you're encouraging it.

-Yeah. -No, it's not encouragement...

but if you're gonna to do it in the real world

and there's an option to do it in the... other reality...

Isn't that a part of a human, we have these tendencies in us

but acting upon them, that's when it becomes an issue.

Yeah, but we have a switch in our brains to turn it off.

Not a switch on a console to turn it on.

Yeah. But everyone has seen The Matrix , right?

Everyone is dying to get out of the Matrix.

Yes, so that's the next step.

-We get in, and then we're like... -"Can we come back out!"

-Hey. -Hi. Are you at home?

I'm outside.

-Can I come up? -No, I'll come down instead.

Yeah, okay.

-No, I promise! -Stop...

-No, I don't understand you. -You don't understand...

Oh, God.

-Hi. -Hi.

Sorry for just turning up like this.

No worries. It's just that...

It's not a good time to visit. Mario's feeling a bit down.

Okay.

But...

I guess I felt like I...

I just wanted to see you and talk.

Because...

You know...

I really want to give you time and space, David.

And I completely get that you need that.

But... it's hard for me, too.

Like, I haven't been in touch for like a really long time,

and I don't know if that's the right thing to do.

If you still want me to leave you alone, then I will.

I just...

need to know that that's still what you want.

Because if I were you, I'd probably want you to show me that you cared,

even though I had told you not to.

So I want to... or have to... know. What you want.

Right. I...

I just know that I need more time. I...

I don't know.

But, David, I don't know what that means.

Is it three weeks? Two months? A year?

You need to give me some idea,

because, it's really fucking hard on me too, this whole thing. I mean...

I have no idea how you feel, what's going on.

-And that's... -If I knew myself, I'd tell you.

But I..

I don't.

Okay.

-Exactly. -And trying to be non-judgemental...

It's managing the romance whirlwind.

If you have it at the beginning...

And if you can't manage that change down in tone

to just general happiness and well-being

then that's where relationships might fail.

So how does one get into that, to be more acceptant...

of each other?

Does that mean not having opinions any more?

-Absolutely not. -Not to change somebody,

-...not trying to... -Yeah.

...fit them into what you want them to be.

Learning what they want to be.

And if that's not what you want, that's your issue, not theirs.

Also that thing with...

Subtitles: Annika Bidner