All language subtitles for South Park s28e02 The Woman in the Hat.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,230 --> 00:00:07,631 [theme music] 2 00:00:07,632 --> 00:00:09,305 - ? I'm goin' down to South Park ? 3 00:00:09,306 --> 00:00:11,241 ? Gonna have myself a time ? 4 00:00:11,242 --> 00:00:12,673 - ? Friendly faces everywhere ? 5 00:00:12,674 --> 00:00:14,544 ? Humble folks without temptation ? 6 00:00:14,545 --> 00:00:15,773 - ? I'm goin' down to South Park ? 7 00:00:15,774 --> 00:00:17,610 ? Gonna leave my woes behind ? 8 00:00:17,645 --> 00:00:19,448 - ? Ample parking day or night ? 9 00:00:19,449 --> 00:00:21,353 ? People spouting, "Howdy, neighbor" ? 10 00:00:21,354 --> 00:00:22,518 - ? I'm headin' on down to South Park ? 11 00:00:22,519 --> 00:00:24,789 ? Gonna see if I can't unwind ? 12 00:00:24,857 --> 00:00:27,752 - ? [mumbling] ? 13 00:00:27,753 --> 00:00:28,953 - ? Come on down to South Park ? 14 00:00:28,954 --> 00:00:31,264 ? And meet some friends of mine ? 15 00:00:33,965 --> 00:00:36,832 [bright music] 16 00:00:36,934 --> 00:00:39,166 ? ? 17 00:00:39,268 --> 00:00:43,773 [indistinct chatter] 18 00:00:43,809 --> 00:00:47,143 ? ? 19 00:00:47,178 --> 00:00:49,340 - How was school today, bud? 20 00:00:49,442 --> 00:00:51,977 - It was fine. 21 00:00:52,012 --> 00:00:54,648 - Look, Stan, I know it's been really hard for you 22 00:00:54,684 --> 00:00:56,887 the past month, with us not having a home. 23 00:00:56,989 --> 00:00:58,890 - Yeah, it sucks. 24 00:00:58,992 --> 00:01:00,323 - I've tried to find work, 25 00:01:00,324 --> 00:01:01,786 but there's just not a lot out there. 26 00:01:01,787 --> 00:01:03,294 And with the government shutdown, 27 00:01:03,295 --> 00:01:05,825 I can't get my job back with the USGS. 28 00:01:05,860 --> 00:01:09,297 Times are hard, and I know we all miss Tegridy. 29 00:01:09,332 --> 00:01:10,996 - I don't miss Tegridy, Dad. 30 00:01:11,031 --> 00:01:13,381 I just hate that our family is living in a motel. 31 00:01:13,468 --> 00:01:14,834 It's really embarrassing. 32 00:01:14,835 --> 00:01:17,037 - Well, that's what I need to tell you, Stan. 33 00:01:17,038 --> 00:01:19,971 There's some good news- we're moving out of the motel. 34 00:01:20,006 --> 00:01:22,808 - Wait, really? We can live in a house again? 35 00:01:22,843 --> 00:01:25,513 - Well, no, we can't afford a house, so... 36 00:01:25,581 --> 00:01:28,018 we're moving in with your grandpa. 37 00:01:28,087 --> 00:01:30,213 - Moving in with Grandpa? 38 00:01:33,356 --> 00:01:35,192 - This is a bunch of bull crap! 39 00:01:35,261 --> 00:01:37,193 First you stick me in this place, 40 00:01:37,228 --> 00:01:39,260 and then you all come along? 41 00:01:39,362 --> 00:01:40,899 - Pretty nice, huh, guys? 42 00:01:41,001 --> 00:01:42,594 There's a TV, a microwave, 43 00:01:42,696 --> 00:01:44,698 and we have Bingo on Thursdays. 44 00:01:44,699 --> 00:01:46,872 - There has to be somewhere else we can live. 45 00:01:46,873 --> 00:01:48,099 - Come on, Stan. 46 00:01:48,100 --> 00:01:50,769 You have that space over there by Grandpa's shit pan. 47 00:01:50,770 --> 00:01:52,373 - You can't make me stay here. 48 00:01:52,408 --> 00:01:54,076 This is completely inhumane. 49 00:01:54,178 --> 00:01:55,779 - That's what I said! 50 00:01:55,882 --> 00:01:57,849 Didn't work. 51 00:01:57,884 --> 00:02:00,850 [lively music] 52 00:02:00,886 --> 00:02:06,854 ? ? 53 00:02:08,226 --> 00:02:11,298 [hammers pounding, metal clangs] 54 00:02:13,929 --> 00:02:16,565 - OK, so then over here is where you're gonna have 55 00:02:16,634 --> 00:02:19,070 the big golden pillars that you guys wanted. 56 00:02:19,105 --> 00:02:20,401 - Ah, yeah! That's great! 57 00:02:20,470 --> 00:02:22,208 - OK, and then right over here 58 00:02:22,209 --> 00:02:24,239 is where we're gonna put your dance floor. 59 00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:25,404 - All right! 60 00:02:25,473 --> 00:02:27,071 - Wait, dance floor? 61 00:02:27,140 --> 00:02:29,430 I thought we were knocking the East Wing down 62 00:02:29,479 --> 00:02:32,248 to make room for the nursery. 63 00:02:32,317 --> 00:02:34,716 - The what? - The nursery! 64 00:02:34,751 --> 00:02:37,101 You said all this remodeling was for the baby, 65 00:02:37,117 --> 00:02:39,891 not to make room for more of your stupid parties. 66 00:02:39,927 --> 00:02:41,725 - Hey, relax, guy! 67 00:02:41,726 --> 00:02:44,091 We can just stick the baby in the bathroom or something. 68 00:02:44,092 --> 00:02:48,934 - Wow! OK, so obviously I have no say in this remodel. 69 00:02:48,969 --> 00:02:50,161 - Mr. President, sir. 70 00:02:50,263 --> 00:02:53,304 I'm very sorry, but we need to speak with you urgently. 71 00:02:53,406 --> 00:02:55,269 It's a matter of national security. 72 00:02:55,338 --> 00:02:58,773 [dramatic music] 73 00:02:58,808 --> 00:03:01,772 We don't want to frighten you, Mr. President, 74 00:03:01,841 --> 00:03:04,275 but we've received intelligence 75 00:03:04,344 --> 00:03:09,413 that someone might be trying to stop your baby from being born. 76 00:03:09,448 --> 00:03:10,787 - What? 77 00:03:10,856 --> 00:03:12,517 Who? 78 00:03:12,619 --> 00:03:14,785 - Hey! Relax, guy! 79 00:03:14,821 --> 00:03:16,690 - We don't know who yet, sir, 80 00:03:16,792 --> 00:03:19,023 but Pam Bondi has been looking into it. 81 00:03:19,125 --> 00:03:21,292 - That's right, sir, we won't let any harm 82 00:03:21,327 --> 00:03:24,469 come to the baby of the greatest president that ever lived. 83 00:03:24,470 --> 00:03:26,098 You are without equal, sir- - Uh, hey, Pam. 84 00:03:26,099 --> 00:03:28,001 - And we are honored to be- Pam. Pam, sorry. 85 00:03:28,002 --> 00:03:30,303 You got a little shit on your nose there. 86 00:03:30,372 --> 00:03:33,142 - Oh, do I? 87 00:03:33,143 --> 00:03:34,211 Did I get it? 88 00:03:34,212 --> 00:03:35,544 - No, it's still there. 89 00:03:35,646 --> 00:03:37,983 - If someone is trying to harm the baby, 90 00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:39,614 then we must know who. 91 00:03:39,649 --> 00:03:43,152 - Well, there is... one theory. 92 00:03:43,221 --> 00:03:45,557 [sinister music] 93 00:03:45,659 --> 00:03:49,989 Some people believe that by demolishing the East Wing, 94 00:03:50,024 --> 00:03:55,327 we may have unleashed some sort of...wrath. 95 00:03:55,363 --> 00:03:56,496 ? ? 96 00:03:56,564 --> 00:03:59,530 - What kind of wrath? 97 00:03:59,632 --> 00:04:02,004 - Vengeful... 98 00:04:02,072 --> 00:04:03,205 wrath. 99 00:04:03,307 --> 00:04:06,206 [thunder booming] 100 00:04:06,308 --> 00:04:08,976 ? ? 101 00:04:14,020 --> 00:04:17,518 [phone ringing] 102 00:04:17,586 --> 00:04:19,357 - What the hell is going on? 103 00:04:19,392 --> 00:04:21,823 I was supposed to be in Washington. 104 00:04:21,859 --> 00:04:24,593 - There has been a change in plan, Mr. Thiel. 105 00:04:24,695 --> 00:04:27,931 They are on to us at the White House. 106 00:04:28,033 --> 00:04:29,199 - But how? 107 00:04:29,234 --> 00:04:31,028 How did they find out? 108 00:04:31,063 --> 00:04:33,269 - Someone must have heard us talking. 109 00:04:33,371 --> 00:04:35,534 Do you still have the child? 110 00:04:35,570 --> 00:04:36,834 - Yes, he's here. 111 00:04:36,869 --> 00:04:39,004 I have him heavily sedated. 112 00:04:39,039 --> 00:04:41,706 It should last another six, seven hours. 113 00:04:41,774 --> 00:04:43,048 - [chortling laughter] 114 00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:44,382 [mumbling] Six, seven! 115 00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:46,451 - But I can't keep him here forever. 116 00:04:46,553 --> 00:04:50,048 - You'll just have to wait until it is safe. 117 00:04:50,084 --> 00:04:53,889 I think some brownnoser here is after my job. 118 00:05:05,069 --> 00:05:06,266 - Hey. 119 00:05:06,369 --> 00:05:08,233 Come on in. 120 00:05:12,239 --> 00:05:14,941 You guys can't tell anybody that I'm living here. 121 00:05:14,942 --> 00:05:16,944 - Stan, you shouldn't be embarrassed, all right? 122 00:05:16,945 --> 00:05:18,715 Everyone's having a hard time right now. 123 00:05:18,716 --> 00:05:20,485 - Yeah, everyone's having a hard time. 124 00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:21,750 And you know what the problem is? 125 00:05:21,751 --> 00:05:23,388 Nobody's doing anything about it. 126 00:05:23,389 --> 00:05:24,590 How many weeks has it been now, 127 00:05:24,591 --> 00:05:26,584 dealing with one stupid thing after another? 128 00:05:26,585 --> 00:05:29,459 The truth is, I think a lot of people are just afraid to admit 129 00:05:29,460 --> 00:05:32,559 that South Park sucks now. 130 00:05:32,594 --> 00:05:33,929 - South Park sucks now? 131 00:05:33,930 --> 00:05:35,964 - Yeah, everyone knows it. South Park sucks now. 132 00:05:35,965 --> 00:05:37,933 And it's because of all this political shit. 133 00:05:37,934 --> 00:05:40,065 We're just getting totally bogged down in it. 134 00:05:40,066 --> 00:05:42,006 Remember when we used to do stuff? 135 00:05:42,108 --> 00:05:43,158 Just us guys? 136 00:05:43,159 --> 00:05:45,011 Ever since all this political crap took over, 137 00:05:45,012 --> 00:05:46,442 it's like-what? 138 00:05:46,443 --> 00:05:47,845 Like-like what happened to us? 139 00:05:47,846 --> 00:05:49,445 Like, Kenny, I haven't even heard you say anything 140 00:05:49,446 --> 00:05:51,148 in, like, four months. 141 00:05:51,250 --> 00:05:52,778 - [muffled speech] 142 00:05:52,779 --> 00:05:54,012 - You see? That's what I mean! 143 00:05:54,013 --> 00:05:55,478 We don't even know what to say. 144 00:05:55,479 --> 00:05:57,953 South Park's getting ruined, and all of us Gen Alpha kids 145 00:05:57,954 --> 00:05:59,624 are just sitting here, watching it happen. 146 00:05:59,625 --> 00:06:01,653 - You're right, dude. - [muffled] Yeah! 147 00:06:01,755 --> 00:06:03,156 - But what do we do? 148 00:06:04,693 --> 00:06:06,962 - I know exactly what to do. 149 00:06:06,963 --> 00:06:09,962 Hey, guys, are you sick and tired 150 00:06:09,963 --> 00:06:11,297 of what's happening to our town? 151 00:06:11,298 --> 00:06:13,640 Do you feel like it's broken and going nowhere? 152 00:06:13,641 --> 00:06:15,471 Then click below and join our online community 153 00:06:15,472 --> 00:06:16,804 at South Park Sucks Now. 154 00:06:16,805 --> 00:06:18,269 Things are clearly not right here, 155 00:06:18,270 --> 00:06:19,805 and if you're like us, you are fed up! 156 00:06:19,806 --> 00:06:21,174 - South Park Sucks Now! 157 00:06:21,175 --> 00:06:23,713 - So please, like and subscribe, smash the button, upvote- 158 00:06:23,714 --> 00:06:24,848 whatever the hell you need to do, 159 00:06:24,849 --> 00:06:28,151 because together, we can make a difference. 160 00:06:28,220 --> 00:06:33,385 [eerie music] 161 00:06:33,386 --> 00:06:36,057 DAN SCAVINO: Mr. President, we don't want you to be afraid. 162 00:06:36,058 --> 00:06:39,359 Tell us exactly what it is you think you saw. 163 00:06:39,461 --> 00:06:40,863 ? ? 164 00:06:40,965 --> 00:06:43,330 - Ever since I tore down the East Wing, there's... 165 00:06:43,399 --> 00:06:45,137 this thing 166 00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:47,864 that keeps appearing. 167 00:06:47,966 --> 00:06:50,738 - What kind of thing? 168 00:06:50,840 --> 00:06:53,144 - Sometimes I see it in a mirror. 169 00:06:53,180 --> 00:06:54,878 Or in the hallway. 170 00:06:54,879 --> 00:06:57,010 PAM BONDI: President Trump, you are an incredible man. 171 00:06:57,011 --> 00:06:59,179 Whatever this is, we have your back. 172 00:06:59,214 --> 00:07:01,684 - Uh, Pam. Pam, you got some shit on your nose again. 173 00:07:01,715 --> 00:07:03,654 - Oh, really? 174 00:07:03,690 --> 00:07:06,357 - Mr. President, this entity you speak of, 175 00:07:06,393 --> 00:07:08,020 how many times has it appeared? 176 00:07:08,088 --> 00:07:10,756 - It appears more and more lately. 177 00:07:10,858 --> 00:07:12,494 I-I can't get away from it. 178 00:07:12,529 --> 00:07:13,757 It's everywhere I go. 179 00:07:13,859 --> 00:07:15,191 [music stops] 180 00:07:15,260 --> 00:07:17,696 [whispering] It's here right now. 181 00:07:17,731 --> 00:07:19,235 In the corner. 182 00:07:19,337 --> 00:07:23,574 [ominous tone] 183 00:07:23,676 --> 00:07:26,945 - I'm pretty sure that's your wife, sir. 184 00:07:27,047 --> 00:07:28,610 - My wife? 185 00:07:28,611 --> 00:07:30,347 [whispering] What does it want? 186 00:07:30,348 --> 00:07:33,046 [ominous tone] 187 00:07:33,115 --> 00:07:35,721 - Maybe it's somehow trying to communicate. 188 00:07:35,722 --> 00:07:37,951 Don't worry, we won't let anything happen to you. 189 00:07:37,952 --> 00:07:39,588 - Ah! Where did Pam Bondi go? 190 00:07:39,691 --> 00:07:41,756 - What? - Pam Bondi! She's gone! 191 00:07:41,757 --> 00:07:43,459 - But she was sitting right here! 192 00:07:43,460 --> 00:07:44,510 - Pam? - Pam? 193 00:07:44,528 --> 00:07:45,922 - Where's Pam Bondi? 194 00:07:46,024 --> 00:07:47,290 - I'm right here, sir! 195 00:07:47,392 --> 00:07:49,964 - [gasps] Look, it's back. - What's back? 196 00:07:49,965 --> 00:07:51,734 - You've got some shit on your nose again. 197 00:07:51,735 --> 00:07:54,198 - Oh, my God! What is going on? 198 00:07:54,234 --> 00:07:56,104 - That thing! It's not there anymore. 199 00:07:57,903 --> 00:07:58,976 [ominous tone] 200 00:07:59,078 --> 00:08:00,372 Ah! 201 00:08:06,252 --> 00:08:07,880 [tones chime] 202 00:08:07,915 --> 00:08:09,235 PA: Good morning, seniors. 203 00:08:09,255 --> 00:08:10,887 It's 6:30 a.m. 204 00:08:10,922 --> 00:08:13,257 Rise and shine for your morning medication. 205 00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:15,087 - Ugh, God, 6:30? 206 00:08:15,156 --> 00:08:17,257 - Yeah, it fucking sucks, doesn't it? 207 00:08:25,336 --> 00:08:26,598 - Holy shit. 208 00:08:26,633 --> 00:08:27,683 - What? 209 00:08:27,768 --> 00:08:29,439 - Holy shit. 210 00:08:29,474 --> 00:08:32,335 756,000 likes, you guys. 211 00:08:32,437 --> 00:08:34,571 We just built a massive online community. 212 00:08:34,607 --> 00:08:37,137 - Wow. I can't believe how many people agree with us. 213 00:08:37,138 --> 00:08:39,318 - I thought we could get 50 or 60 kids from school to sign up, 214 00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:40,459 but this is incredible. 215 00:08:40,460 --> 00:08:41,980 - All right, we've got everyone's attention. 216 00:08:41,981 --> 00:08:43,083 So what do we do now? 217 00:08:43,084 --> 00:08:44,983 - What do you mean, dude? It's obvious. 218 00:08:44,984 --> 00:08:46,619 It's time for phase two. 219 00:08:46,688 --> 00:08:49,020 [gentle music] 220 00:08:49,122 --> 00:08:51,157 Hey, guys, if you've come here, 221 00:08:51,158 --> 00:08:53,294 then you're likely joining the chorus of voices 222 00:08:53,295 --> 00:08:55,830 that's fed up with the direction our town is going. 223 00:08:55,932 --> 00:08:58,535 We all want change in our community. 224 00:08:58,637 --> 00:09:00,438 And now there's an opportunity 225 00:09:00,474 --> 00:09:02,435 to truly make your voices heard. 226 00:09:02,470 --> 00:09:06,844 Introducing the South Park Sucks Now cryptocurrency coin. 227 00:09:06,845 --> 00:09:08,848 This digital meme token is your way to be a part 228 00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:10,642 of the fastest-growing community in America. 229 00:09:10,643 --> 00:09:12,978 This used to be a great town before all the politics came 230 00:09:12,979 --> 00:09:14,144 and ruined it all. 231 00:09:14,180 --> 00:09:15,620 Get in on our crypto meme coin 232 00:09:15,621 --> 00:09:17,389 with this incredible presale offer. 233 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:18,790 Each coin is just $9.95, 234 00:09:18,791 --> 00:09:20,623 but could be worth ten times that overnight! 235 00:09:20,624 --> 00:09:21,988 - Wait, a meme coin? 236 00:09:21,989 --> 00:09:23,522 - Do you want South Park to change? 237 00:09:23,523 --> 00:09:26,631 Then order your coin today at SouthParkSucksNow.com. 238 00:09:26,632 --> 00:09:27,833 Stan Marsh is not a financial advisor 239 00:09:27,834 --> 00:09:28,865 affiliated with any financial institution. 240 00:09:28,866 --> 00:09:29,833 Digital assets are highly volatile 241 00:09:29,834 --> 00:09:30,832 and may involve significant risk, 242 00:09:30,833 --> 00:09:32,000 including loss of all funds. 243 00:09:32,001 --> 00:09:33,335 Ownership of South Park Sucks Now Coin 244 00:09:33,336 --> 00:09:34,365 does not represent equity, profit sharing, or ownership 245 00:09:34,366 --> 00:09:35,799 of any company platform or project. 246 00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:37,040 Participation is voluntary and should only be undertaken 247 00:09:37,041 --> 00:09:38,073 by individuals who fully understand the risks 248 00:09:38,074 --> 00:09:39,307 associated with block chain assets. 249 00:09:39,308 --> 00:09:40,572 South Park Sucks Now Coin is not registered with 250 00:09:40,573 --> 00:09:42,180 or regulated by the SEC or any financial authority. 251 00:09:42,181 --> 00:09:43,510 Please review all disclosures and consult a licensed financial 252 00:09:43,511 --> 00:09:46,401 advisor before engaging in digital asset transactions. 253 00:09:46,484 --> 00:09:48,682 [thunder booming] 254 00:09:48,718 --> 00:09:51,683 [ominous music] 255 00:09:51,719 --> 00:09:58,864 ? ? 256 00:10:15,578 --> 00:10:16,906 [scraping] 257 00:10:17,008 --> 00:10:18,680 ? ? 258 00:10:18,715 --> 00:10:20,050 [shower curtain scrapes] 259 00:10:24,586 --> 00:10:25,885 ? ? 260 00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:28,852 [Towelie screaming] 261 00:10:28,888 --> 00:10:31,857 ? ? 262 00:10:31,893 --> 00:10:34,058 [cabinet squeaks] 263 00:10:34,127 --> 00:10:36,398 - Ahh! [ominous tone] 264 00:10:36,467 --> 00:10:37,533 Ah, fuck! 265 00:10:37,568 --> 00:10:39,064 Fuck! - What? 266 00:10:39,099 --> 00:10:41,737 - It's the Woman in the Hat! 267 00:10:41,738 --> 00:10:43,101 - What are you talking about? 268 00:10:43,102 --> 00:10:44,234 - The Woman in the Hat! 269 00:10:44,303 --> 00:10:46,769 She's in the fucking bathroom! 270 00:10:47,194 --> 00:10:51,079 - We've double checked everything, sir. 271 00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:52,750 All the exterior doors are locked. 272 00:10:52,751 --> 00:10:54,552 No windows have been breached. 273 00:10:54,553 --> 00:10:56,085 - And yet the president swears 274 00:10:56,086 --> 00:10:57,623 something was in the room with him. 275 00:10:57,624 --> 00:10:58,951 - Is he going to be all right? 276 00:10:58,952 --> 00:11:00,426 - Pretty shaken. 277 00:11:00,427 --> 00:11:01,653 Pam Bondi is in there now 278 00:11:01,654 --> 00:11:03,594 trying to calm him down and make him feel better. 279 00:11:03,595 --> 00:11:05,462 PAM BONDI: [screaming] 280 00:11:05,564 --> 00:11:07,397 DAN SCAVINO: Pam? 281 00:11:07,433 --> 00:11:08,728 Oh, my God! 282 00:11:08,764 --> 00:11:12,234 - [groaning] 283 00:11:16,576 --> 00:11:19,175 - Stan, what are we doing? 284 00:11:19,176 --> 00:11:21,679 - What do you mean, dude? We're trying to change things. 285 00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:23,740 - By selling cryptocurrency? 286 00:11:23,741 --> 00:11:25,777 - What's wrong with trying to make a little money 287 00:11:25,778 --> 00:11:28,118 while also pointing out the things wrong with our town? 288 00:11:28,119 --> 00:11:29,314 - [muffled] Yeah, what's wrong with that? 289 00:11:29,315 --> 00:11:30,616 - I have to do something, Kyle. 290 00:11:30,617 --> 00:11:32,650 I'm nine years old and I live in a retirement home. 291 00:11:32,651 --> 00:11:35,093 - And you really think crypto is your way out? 292 00:11:35,094 --> 00:11:37,459 Do you even know anything about how that stuff works? 293 00:11:37,460 --> 00:11:40,259 - Well, actually, we have a really strong crypto advisor- 294 00:11:40,260 --> 00:11:42,662 your cousin on the east coast. 295 00:11:42,765 --> 00:11:44,435 - My cousin? 296 00:11:44,470 --> 00:11:46,466 - I'm back! 297 00:11:46,467 --> 00:11:48,265 All right, looks like we've got a lot of movement 298 00:11:48,266 --> 00:11:49,540 on your coin, boys. 299 00:11:49,642 --> 00:11:50,966 The presale really popped. 300 00:11:50,967 --> 00:11:53,305 We cleared 100 grand in volume before liquidity even locked. 301 00:11:53,306 --> 00:11:55,011 The token's really got traction. 302 00:11:55,012 --> 00:11:57,314 - And we don't ever have to pay anything, right? 303 00:11:57,315 --> 00:11:59,718 - Nope, you never pay anything. You guys created the coin, 304 00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:00,882 so all you do is profit from it. 305 00:12:00,883 --> 00:12:02,354 - See? I told you. 306 00:12:02,456 --> 00:12:03,613 - [muffled speech] 307 00:12:03,614 --> 00:12:05,155 - Now we just need to keep creating hype 308 00:12:05,156 --> 00:12:06,884 around the South Park Sucks Now digital coin, 309 00:12:06,885 --> 00:12:09,123 so we need to come up with things to give people FOMO 310 00:12:09,124 --> 00:12:10,993 and make them ape even harder. 311 00:12:11,061 --> 00:12:12,992 - You guys, this isn't about a coin. 312 00:12:13,060 --> 00:12:14,730 It's about a movement. 313 00:12:14,832 --> 00:12:16,032 - Oh, that's really good. 314 00:12:16,033 --> 00:12:17,366 - Yeah, yeah, that's perfect. 315 00:12:17,367 --> 00:12:19,169 "This isn't about a coin. It's about a movement." 316 00:12:19,170 --> 00:12:21,403 Yeah, that's some savvy Jew Jitsu right there. 317 00:12:21,404 --> 00:12:22,673 - So what kind of time frame are we looking at 318 00:12:22,674 --> 00:12:23,709 to get our money? 319 00:12:23,710 --> 00:12:25,090 I need it as fast as possible. 320 00:12:25,091 --> 00:12:26,908 - Well, I think we're looking at a classic rug pull 321 00:12:26,909 --> 00:12:28,011 in just a few days. 322 00:12:28,012 --> 00:12:29,545 Once we pump the coin high as it'll go, 323 00:12:29,546 --> 00:12:31,643 then I can register for an MSB with the federal government. 324 00:12:31,644 --> 00:12:33,915 - The federal government? That sounds hard. 325 00:12:34,017 --> 00:12:35,516 - Oh, no, it's gonna be easy. 326 00:12:35,517 --> 00:12:37,717 The crypto corruption at the White House is off the chain. 327 00:12:37,718 --> 00:12:39,558 We're gonna screw a lot of people out of their money, boys. 328 00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:41,356 It's gonna be fantastic. 329 00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:45,726 [thunder booming] 330 00:12:45,828 --> 00:12:48,033 [heavy knocking] 331 00:12:50,536 --> 00:12:52,831 [thunder booms] 332 00:12:52,866 --> 00:12:55,070 - Yes? 333 00:12:55,172 --> 00:12:58,040 - Uh, yes, we're paranormal investigators. 334 00:12:58,041 --> 00:12:59,712 We've been asked to come and investigate 335 00:12:59,713 --> 00:13:02,777 the mysterious Woman in the Hat. 336 00:13:02,879 --> 00:13:06,379 - I am Stephen Miller, 337 00:13:06,380 --> 00:13:08,950 Senior Advisor to the President for Immigration 338 00:13:08,951 --> 00:13:10,586 and Domestic Policy. 339 00:13:10,688 --> 00:13:13,082 [thunder booms] 340 00:13:13,185 --> 00:13:14,391 Won't you... 341 00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:17,095 come in? 342 00:13:18,216 --> 00:13:23,698 PARANORMAL INVESTIGATOR HUSBAND: Oh, my God, it's incredible. 343 00:13:23,699 --> 00:13:27,264 Subject is showing some kind of viscous residue on her nose. 344 00:13:27,366 --> 00:13:29,402 - Well, what the fuck is it? 345 00:13:29,471 --> 00:13:31,906 - Sometimes there's a physical manifestation 346 00:13:31,941 --> 00:13:33,374 of spiritual energy- 347 00:13:33,410 --> 00:13:36,312 a bridge between the spiritual world and ours. 348 00:13:36,414 --> 00:13:40,616 In this case, it appears to be some kind of rectoplasm. 349 00:13:40,718 --> 00:13:42,213 - Rectoplasm? 350 00:13:42,248 --> 00:13:43,818 - What is it made of? 351 00:13:43,920 --> 00:13:45,255 - It's unbelievable! 352 00:13:45,291 --> 00:13:48,789 The rectoplasm seems to be 54% Filet-O-Fish sandwich! 353 00:13:48,891 --> 00:13:50,093 - Oh, my God! 354 00:13:50,094 --> 00:13:52,258 I ate a Filet-O-Fish sandwich last night! 355 00:13:52,259 --> 00:13:54,059 - Jesus! - And it's also... 356 00:13:54,094 --> 00:13:56,599 28% Taco Bell. 357 00:13:56,668 --> 00:13:57,999 - Oh, my God! 358 00:13:58,101 --> 00:14:00,066 I ate Taco Bell this morning! 359 00:14:00,101 --> 00:14:01,398 - What does it mean? 360 00:14:01,433 --> 00:14:05,401 - And it's 14% its own cum. 361 00:14:05,437 --> 00:14:08,443 - Oh, my God! I ate- 362 00:14:10,177 --> 00:14:12,683 [chuckling awkwardly] 363 00:14:12,785 --> 00:14:15,613 Hey! Pam! Deal with them! 364 00:14:15,682 --> 00:14:20,290 ANNOUNCER: This is a Fox News Super Alert! 365 00:14:20,358 --> 00:14:23,093 - Two paranormal investigators were indicted today 366 00:14:23,128 --> 00:14:25,956 on federal charges of falsifying data. 367 00:14:25,957 --> 00:14:29,098 The president said that the bad people manipulated readings 368 00:14:29,099 --> 00:14:31,466 and reports to make fake news. 369 00:14:31,502 --> 00:14:34,797 The charges were filed by Attorney General Pam Bondi, 370 00:14:34,866 --> 00:14:37,469 who said that "the President is a great man, 371 00:14:37,538 --> 00:14:39,840 even if he does eat his own semen." 372 00:14:39,942 --> 00:14:41,211 In other news, 373 00:14:41,313 --> 00:14:44,013 many people are saying that South Park sucks now. 374 00:14:44,014 --> 00:14:45,977 The small mountain town in Colorado 375 00:14:45,978 --> 00:14:48,984 has been a hotbed of political activity in recent weeks, 376 00:14:49,020 --> 00:14:50,821 and three local Gen Alpha boys 377 00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:53,356 are vowing to put a stop to it. 378 00:14:54,155 --> 00:14:55,823 - OK, we're mooning. 379 00:14:55,892 --> 00:14:57,322 We're mooning... 380 00:14:57,323 --> 00:14:58,792 All right, that's gotta be it. 381 00:14:58,793 --> 00:15:00,864 OK, we're done mooning. I think we're ready to dump. 382 00:15:00,865 --> 00:15:01,915 [train horn blares] 383 00:15:01,916 --> 00:15:03,067 COUSIN KYLE: OK, sounds good. 384 00:15:03,068 --> 00:15:05,169 I'm on the Acela train right now. 385 00:15:05,205 --> 00:15:08,037 I should be in DC by 6:30 to meet with Don Jr. 386 00:15:08,038 --> 00:15:09,339 Once I get White House approval, 387 00:15:09,340 --> 00:15:10,842 we should be able to do the rug pull. 388 00:15:10,843 --> 00:15:13,906 - I'm out, dude. - Kyle? 389 00:15:14,009 --> 00:15:15,741 Kyle, wait! 390 00:15:16,882 --> 00:15:18,182 Dude, you can't quit now. 391 00:15:18,183 --> 00:15:19,682 Do you know how much money we're about to make? 392 00:15:19,683 --> 00:15:22,384 - I thought you were sick of the way South Park was going, Stan. 393 00:15:22,385 --> 00:15:24,248 - I am! - So then why are you trying 394 00:15:24,350 --> 00:15:25,518 to engineer a rug pull 395 00:15:25,519 --> 00:15:27,191 in conjunction with the federal government? 396 00:15:27,192 --> 00:15:29,728 - Bro, it's the world we live in, OK? 397 00:15:29,729 --> 00:15:31,191 I mean, at least we're being men 398 00:15:31,192 --> 00:15:32,524 and taking some control. 399 00:15:32,525 --> 00:15:34,528 Look at Kenny, he-he's doing stuff now! 400 00:15:34,529 --> 00:15:35,929 - [muffled] Yeah, dude, I'm doing stuff! 401 00:15:35,930 --> 00:15:38,768 - I know it sucks to be living in an old folks home, Stan, 402 00:15:38,769 --> 00:15:39,940 but you can't fix things 403 00:15:39,941 --> 00:15:41,991 if you're only thinking about yourself. 404 00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:52,778 [thunder booming] 405 00:15:56,854 --> 00:15:59,125 [heavy knocking] 406 00:16:02,893 --> 00:16:04,087 [thunder booms] 407 00:16:04,189 --> 00:16:06,760 - Yes? 408 00:16:06,862 --> 00:16:09,872 - Uh, yes, I'm with the South Park Sucks Now cryptocurrency. 409 00:16:09,873 --> 00:16:11,803 We're trying to fuck a bunch of people out of their money. 410 00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:13,234 Is Don Jr. around? 411 00:16:13,303 --> 00:16:16,804 - Ah, yes, he's been expecting you. 412 00:16:16,907 --> 00:16:18,804 Do come in. 413 00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:23,611 [door squeaks] 414 00:16:24,909 --> 00:16:27,216 - Oh, Jesus, it's a little drafty in here. 415 00:16:27,252 --> 00:16:29,916 - You'll have to excuse the conditions. 416 00:16:29,951 --> 00:16:33,316 The master has taken down the East Wing and unleashed a wrath. 417 00:16:33,418 --> 00:16:35,089 [eerie moaning] 418 00:16:35,158 --> 00:16:38,125 [unintelligible groaning] 419 00:16:38,227 --> 00:16:39,790 - Oh, Jesus! It's a mummy! 420 00:16:39,892 --> 00:16:42,999 - No, no, that's just the head of the FCC. 421 00:16:43,101 --> 00:16:45,262 He's lost his freedom of speech. 422 00:16:45,298 --> 00:16:46,971 - [mumbles] 423 00:16:47,073 --> 00:16:52,105 - Come. Don Jr. is... this way. 424 00:16:52,140 --> 00:16:55,107 [thunder booms] 425 00:16:55,176 --> 00:16:57,347 [eerie music] 426 00:16:57,348 --> 00:16:59,614 - Thanks so much for taking my meeting, Don Jr. 427 00:16:59,615 --> 00:17:01,484 We've got an incredible crypto opportunity here 428 00:17:01,485 --> 00:17:03,482 and we just need your help taking a big dump. 429 00:17:03,483 --> 00:17:04,850 - That sounds really great. 430 00:17:04,952 --> 00:17:07,853 There's nothing I like better than a big crypto dump. 431 00:17:07,854 --> 00:17:09,953 - So sorry I had to bug you this late in the evening, 432 00:17:09,954 --> 00:17:11,926 but time really is of the essence here. 433 00:17:11,962 --> 00:17:14,331 [door opens] 434 00:17:14,433 --> 00:17:17,294 - We need everyone to gather in the dining room. 435 00:17:17,330 --> 00:17:18,869 Immediately. 436 00:17:18,971 --> 00:17:21,532 - In the dining room? Why? 437 00:17:21,634 --> 00:17:24,109 - We are going to have a s๏ฟฝance. 438 00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:27,978 It's time to confront the spirit here. 439 00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:31,011 - The-the spirit? What spirit? 440 00:17:31,113 --> 00:17:34,220 [line ringing] 441 00:17:35,150 --> 00:17:37,320 - [muffled speech] 442 00:17:37,321 --> 00:17:38,649 - Yeah, I can see the price is going down. 443 00:17:38,650 --> 00:17:40,057 What the hell is he doing? 444 00:17:40,058 --> 00:17:41,456 - [muffled] He's not answering? 445 00:17:41,457 --> 00:17:42,457 COUSIN KYLE: Hello, you've reached 446 00:17:42,458 --> 00:17:43,792 Pump and Dump Crypto Advisors. 447 00:17:43,793 --> 00:17:45,658 Let us know how we can help you fuck people over. 448 00:17:45,659 --> 00:17:47,833 Just leave a message. [beep] 449 00:17:47,868 --> 00:17:49,192 - Dude, what is going on? 450 00:17:49,193 --> 00:17:52,064 Our token's value totally peaked and it's starting to go down. 451 00:17:52,065 --> 00:17:53,664 Whatever approval you have to get at the White House, 452 00:17:53,665 --> 00:17:55,134 we need it now! [beep] 453 00:17:55,135 --> 00:17:56,204 God damn it! 454 00:17:56,205 --> 00:17:58,308 - [muffled speech] 455 00:17:58,343 --> 00:18:01,404 - I don't know, Kenny, OK? Shut up already! 456 00:18:01,506 --> 00:18:04,373 [eerie music] 457 00:18:04,475 --> 00:18:06,315 ? ? 458 00:18:06,350 --> 00:18:08,352 - Oh, Jesus, this is a little creepy. 459 00:18:08,387 --> 00:18:11,015 Are we having dinner? I'm allergic to dairy. 460 00:18:11,050 --> 00:18:14,152 - Everyone, please put your hands on the table. 461 00:18:14,188 --> 00:18:18,020 ? ? 462 00:18:18,055 --> 00:18:22,265 I am speaking to the entity in this house. 463 00:18:22,266 --> 00:18:24,028 - Is this a good time to talk turkey? 464 00:18:24,029 --> 00:18:26,430 I just need to go over some quick business. 465 00:18:26,532 --> 00:18:29,204 - We know you are sad. 466 00:18:29,239 --> 00:18:31,706 We know you are...lonely. 467 00:18:31,774 --> 00:18:36,075 But we must ask you to leave our president alone. 468 00:18:36,177 --> 00:18:38,710 ? ? 469 00:18:38,746 --> 00:18:41,449 - Oh, my God, this is really scary. 470 00:18:41,551 --> 00:18:43,883 PAM BONDI: The President is a great man, 471 00:18:43,951 --> 00:18:47,725 and he does not deserve to be tormented like this. 472 00:18:47,761 --> 00:18:49,353 - Pam! Pam! 473 00:18:49,388 --> 00:18:51,388 - Oh! Oh. 474 00:18:51,457 --> 00:18:53,623 Restless spirit, 475 00:18:53,725 --> 00:18:56,867 we only wish to communicate! 476 00:18:56,903 --> 00:18:59,369 [thunder booming] 477 00:18:59,404 --> 00:19:01,772 - Holy shit! She's right fucking there! 478 00:19:01,874 --> 00:19:03,138 - What is that? 479 00:19:03,240 --> 00:19:07,041 - [moaning] Deception! 480 00:19:07,076 --> 00:19:09,708 Deception! 481 00:19:09,743 --> 00:19:11,974 - Boss, maybe we should stop this. 482 00:19:12,076 --> 00:19:14,246 - No! I wanna hear what it has to say. 483 00:19:14,282 --> 00:19:16,247 - [moaning] 484 00:19:16,283 --> 00:19:18,652 Epstein! 485 00:19:18,653 --> 00:19:20,417 - Uh, no, no. You're right. Let's stop this. 486 00:19:20,418 --> 00:19:22,089 - You! 487 00:19:22,158 --> 00:19:24,729 [eerie music] 488 00:19:24,765 --> 00:19:25,961 - What? You? 489 00:19:25,962 --> 00:19:27,062 What did he do? 490 00:19:27,063 --> 00:19:29,593 - He lies! 491 00:19:29,661 --> 00:19:31,934 - Oh, you fucking bitch! 492 00:19:32,003 --> 00:19:34,300 - Corruption! 493 00:19:34,402 --> 00:19:35,768 - She's not possessed! 494 00:19:35,836 --> 00:19:38,941 Pam Bondi's trying to get my fucking job! 495 00:19:39,010 --> 00:19:40,977 [thunder booms] 496 00:19:41,079 --> 00:19:42,405 - Oh, I can't do this! 497 00:19:42,440 --> 00:19:43,506 - Lies! 498 00:19:43,608 --> 00:19:45,445 - [muttering] 499 00:19:45,480 --> 00:19:47,014 - I gotta get out of here! 500 00:19:47,116 --> 00:19:48,283 ? ? 501 00:19:48,351 --> 00:19:49,950 [face screaming] - Oh, God! 502 00:19:50,019 --> 00:19:51,788 Oh! 503 00:19:51,789 --> 00:19:52,650 ? ? 504 00:19:52,651 --> 00:19:55,623 OK! OK! It's all true! 505 00:19:55,691 --> 00:19:58,187 We've been dealing in deception and lies! 506 00:19:58,289 --> 00:20:00,863 We've all been getting filthy rich off of crypto! 507 00:20:00,864 --> 00:20:01,793 Oh, Jesus. 508 00:20:01,794 --> 00:20:03,697 We've lied and we've cheated. 509 00:20:03,698 --> 00:20:05,499 Crypto's just a giant money laundering scheme 510 00:20:05,500 --> 00:20:06,534 for the rich to get richer. 511 00:20:06,535 --> 00:20:08,267 Please don't haunt us anymore! 512 00:20:08,303 --> 00:20:09,468 We're sorry. 513 00:20:09,503 --> 00:20:12,474 We're all very sorry! 514 00:20:12,542 --> 00:20:15,879 ANNOUNCER: This is a Fox News! 515 00:20:15,981 --> 00:20:18,682 Agh! America! 516 00:20:18,784 --> 00:20:21,979 - A massive crypto fraud has been exposed at the White House, 517 00:20:22,014 --> 00:20:24,621 and the perpetrator has been indicted. 518 00:20:24,622 --> 00:20:27,217 A ghostly wrath that was unleashed in the East Wing 519 00:20:27,218 --> 00:20:29,990 exposed the traitor at a s๏ฟฝance last night. 520 00:20:30,059 --> 00:20:33,994 The traitor is now behind bars and serving 10 years for fraud. 521 00:20:34,029 --> 00:20:37,698 Charges, of course, were once again filed by Pam Bondi, 522 00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:41,000 who said, "We will continue to indict anyone 523 00:20:41,035 --> 00:20:44,469 who says bad stuff about our amazing president." 524 00:20:44,504 --> 00:20:48,304 [gentle music] 525 00:20:48,340 --> 00:20:51,012 STAN: I'm sorry, Kyle. I should have listened to you. 526 00:20:51,081 --> 00:20:53,548 ? ? 527 00:20:53,650 --> 00:20:56,153 I guess there just no really going back 528 00:20:56,189 --> 00:20:59,156 to the way things used to be. 529 00:20:59,192 --> 00:21:00,686 - Things will get back, Stan. 530 00:21:00,687 --> 00:21:01,920 I know it's hard to see right now, 531 00:21:01,921 --> 00:21:04,859 but things will go back to normal. 532 00:21:04,860 --> 00:21:07,394 And in the meantime, we just have to make the most 533 00:21:07,395 --> 00:21:09,026 of where we are. 534 00:21:09,095 --> 00:21:13,197 ["If I Didn't Care" by The Ink Spots] 535 00:21:13,233 --> 00:21:16,202 - All right, seniors, just move with the rhythm now. 536 00:21:16,238 --> 00:21:17,536 ? ? 537 00:21:17,605 --> 00:21:20,772 - ? If I didn't care ? 538 00:21:20,874 --> 00:21:23,543 NURSE: Good! Good, seniors. Nice! 539 00:21:23,612 --> 00:21:28,283 - ? More than words can say ? 540 00:21:28,385 --> 00:21:33,421 ? If I didn't care ? 541 00:21:33,523 --> 00:21:38,692 ? Would I feel this way? ? 542 00:21:38,728 --> 00:21:45,035 ? If this isn't love, then why ? 543 00:21:45,070 --> 00:21:47,970 [theme music] 544 00:21:48,072 --> 00:21:54,975 ? ? 545 00:21:55,025 --> 00:21:59,575 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 38927

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