Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:11,040 --> 00:00:12,780
Oh, my God, Maggie. What is she doing?
2
00:00:13,020 --> 00:00:14,360
Where did you find this?
3
00:00:14,460 --> 00:00:16,139
Her roommate's mother sent it to me,
4
00:00:16,140 --> 00:00:17,159
because she's worried.
5
00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:18,840
Oh, it's mesmerizing.
6
00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:20,930
What is it? Is it porn?
7
00:00:20,960 --> 00:00:23,739
It's called breadfacing, and yes,
8
00:00:23,740 --> 00:00:26,100
people are definitely jerking off to it.
9
00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:27,580
This is a cry for help.
10
00:00:27,720 --> 00:00:30,000
Actually, it's hard to cry
with bread in your mouth.
11
00:00:37,490 --> 00:00:38,590
I'll throw it out.
12
00:00:47,100 --> 00:00:48,360
Oh, my God.
13
00:00:48,400 --> 00:00:50,140
Lauren, what the hell?
14
00:00:50,160 --> 00:00:52,100
Relax. It's for an event tonight.
15
00:00:55,060 --> 00:00:56,320
Here's your dry-cleaning.
16
00:00:56,420 --> 00:00:57,970
I mean, it's not really dry-cleaned.
17
00:00:58,070 --> 00:00:59,990
I just ironed it really hard
and put it in this bag,
18
00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:02,110
but... whatever.
19
00:01:03,350 --> 00:01:04,440
Thank you.
20
00:01:06,110 --> 00:01:08,300
- Who is that?
- Oh, that's my new intern.
21
00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:09,559
You have an intern?
22
00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:11,020
It's basically slave labor,
23
00:01:11,030 --> 00:01:13,050
TBQH, but, you know, they're
getting a credit for school,
24
00:01:13,060 --> 00:01:14,460
so my conscience is clear.
25
00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:17,580
Come on. Seriously?
26
00:01:17,590 --> 00:01:18,706
I know. I know. I am so sorry.
27
00:01:18,730 --> 00:01:20,710
I just... I have a major deal tonight.
28
00:01:20,810 --> 00:01:21,900
Makeup?
29
00:01:21,980 --> 00:01:24,540
Yeah, it's makeup you
can eat, but I wouldn't.
30
00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:26,870
Can I get anyone some coffee?
31
00:01:26,970 --> 00:01:28,800
No, uh...
32
00:01:28,900 --> 00:01:29,980
I'm good.
33
00:01:30,020 --> 00:01:31,920
I'm good, dude.
34
00:01:32,020 --> 00:01:33,020
Thank you, though.
35
00:01:36,490 --> 00:01:37,490
Who's he?
36
00:01:37,500 --> 00:01:40,300
Josh, their name is Tam, okay?
37
00:01:40,310 --> 00:01:42,310
You can't just assume
everyone's pronouns, buddy.
38
00:01:43,990 --> 00:01:46,130
Okay, I'm gonna be down in the shop
39
00:01:46,230 --> 00:01:47,730
in case anyone needs me.
40
00:01:53,760 --> 00:01:55,260
Josh, good morning.
41
00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:57,380
Hey, good morning.
42
00:01:57,480 --> 00:01:59,540
You haven't been returning
any of my messages.
43
00:01:59,980 --> 00:02:01,399
I know, it's...
44
00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:03,130
look, it's been a crazy week.
45
00:02:03,480 --> 00:02:05,510
Josh, I need an answer.
46
00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:07,439
I know. I'm figuring it out.
47
00:02:07,440 --> 00:02:10,640
Just... give me 24 hours.
48
00:02:10,700 --> 00:02:12,840
Okay, 24 hours.
49
00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:20,740
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
50
00:02:25,590 --> 00:02:26,780
Guys, I'm sorry.
51
00:02:26,790 --> 00:02:29,130
It's just it's the busiest
season of the year.
52
00:02:29,230 --> 00:02:31,540
There's all these schmoozing
events before the mid-terms.
53
00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:33,100
We totally understand that.
54
00:02:33,140 --> 00:02:36,590
But last Thursday, we had a
drop-dead date for chapter one
55
00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:39,640
and yet still no chapter one.
56
00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:43,830
Okay, no more excuses.
57
00:02:43,930 --> 00:02:46,590
After this Arianna
Huffington event tonight,
58
00:02:46,690 --> 00:02:48,310
I will hit the ground running.
59
00:02:48,410 --> 00:02:50,160
Ooh, what Arianna Huffington event?
60
00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:52,510
It's on #negativethinking.
61
00:02:52,610 --> 00:02:56,100
Oh, yet another Twitter
movement that I'm behind on.
62
00:02:56,180 --> 00:02:59,360
No, it's just an excuse to
drink and to talk about
63
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:00,699
how liberals are still arguing
64
00:03:00,700 --> 00:03:02,340
about Bernie versus Hillary.
65
00:03:02,460 --> 00:03:05,260
It's cathartic, I think.
66
00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:07,260
You should... you should come with me.
67
00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:08,980
I would love to.
68
00:03:10,270 --> 00:03:12,410
Sorry, I've only got a plus-one.
69
00:03:12,420 --> 00:03:13,420
Oh, that's fine.
70
00:03:13,430 --> 00:03:15,420
I don't have the energy
for that accent tonight.
71
00:03:15,540 --> 00:03:16,880
You kids have fun.
72
00:03:16,960 --> 00:03:18,220
Don't worry about me.
73
00:03:25,650 --> 00:03:32,280
_
74
00:03:32,580 --> 00:03:35,740
_
75
00:03:47,830 --> 00:03:49,570
Popular, popular guy here.
76
00:03:49,580 --> 00:03:52,410
Yeah...
77
00:03:52,510 --> 00:03:54,170
Okay, sorry I keep
parading you around here.
78
00:03:54,190 --> 00:03:56,820
Just talking about myself
always makes me nervous.
79
00:03:56,920 --> 00:03:58,000
Really?
80
00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:00,340
It doesn't seem to bother
you on your podcast.
81
00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:01,739
You know, strangely,
82
00:04:01,740 --> 00:04:04,020
I think I am most comfortable
83
00:04:04,040 --> 00:04:05,720
either in a crowd or alone.
84
00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:09,079
One-on-one, I'm...
85
00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:10,609
terrible.
86
00:04:10,610 --> 00:04:12,960
You're doing fine.
87
00:04:13,180 --> 00:04:14,600
Thanks.
88
00:04:15,090 --> 00:04:16,310
Jake.
89
00:04:16,410 --> 00:04:19,000
Oh, good. Here comes a crowd.
90
00:04:19,100 --> 00:04:22,840
Guys, this is my editor, Kelsey Peters.
91
00:04:22,940 --> 00:04:24,920
- Hi.
- Kelsey, this is Levitt
92
00:04:25,010 --> 00:04:26,010
and Charlotte.
93
00:04:26,020 --> 00:04:28,720
Their co-hosts of the podcast
and spent some time
94
00:04:28,740 --> 00:04:29,869
with me in the White House.
95
00:04:29,870 --> 00:04:30,940
I know who they are.
96
00:04:31,020 --> 00:04:32,980
Still can't believe you got
a book deal before me.
97
00:04:33,030 --> 00:04:35,620
I read "Conversations With
My Doodle" and loved it.
98
00:04:35,780 --> 00:04:38,600
And surprisingly, not ironically.
99
00:04:38,720 --> 00:04:40,780
That book was a surprise to all of us.
100
00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:42,679
Kelsey just signed a content deal
101
00:04:42,680 --> 00:04:44,300
with Reese Witherspoon's company.
102
00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:45,700
What? Okay, don't move.
103
00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:46,920
We're gonna get you a drink,
104
00:04:46,930 --> 00:04:48,056
and you're gonna tell us everything.
105
00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:49,420
Okay.
106
00:04:51,220 --> 00:04:52,380
Come on.
107
00:04:52,890 --> 00:04:54,720
I don't want to share you tonight.
108
00:05:01,140 --> 00:05:02,520
- Ohh.
- How about that view?
109
00:05:02,620 --> 00:05:04,060
Come on.
110
00:05:04,700 --> 00:05:06,540
God, I love this city.
111
00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:10,480
- There.
- Oh, thanks.
112
00:05:13,390 --> 00:05:14,970
When do you go back to D.C.?
113
00:05:15,070 --> 00:05:16,850
Tomorrow morning.
114
00:05:17,140 --> 00:05:18,950
Wish I could stay longer.
115
00:05:21,840 --> 00:05:23,150
Can I kiss you?
116
00:05:23,160 --> 00:05:24,160
What?
117
00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:26,980
Sorry.
118
00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:28,360
I just thought that
119
00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:31,239
Obama's speech writer would...
120
00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:32,950
be a little smoother than that.
121
00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:35,620
Oh, well, it worked on Michelle.
122
00:05:36,610 --> 00:05:37,610
I'm kidding.
123
00:05:37,611 --> 00:05:39,870
- Kidding.
- Oh.
124
00:05:39,970 --> 00:05:41,520
I wish you weren't.
125
00:05:41,760 --> 00:05:43,520
That would be so good in the book.
126
00:05:43,620 --> 00:05:44,880
Yeah.
127
00:05:44,980 --> 00:05:47,020
You really only care about the book?
128
00:05:47,980 --> 00:05:49,540
I am your editor.
129
00:05:50,300 --> 00:05:53,340
Still haven't answered my question.
130
00:06:06,480 --> 00:06:09,020
Falafels are on me.
131
00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:10,100
Thank you.
132
00:06:10,140 --> 00:06:14,160
My article on "Where Are They
Now: The Members of O-Town"
133
00:06:14,530 --> 00:06:16,350
just got 100,000 views, so...
134
00:06:16,370 --> 00:06:18,030
Oh, well, congratulations?
135
00:06:18,130 --> 00:06:19,140
Thank you.
136
00:06:19,530 --> 00:06:20,530
- Oh.
- Ooh.
137
00:06:20,570 --> 00:06:21,940
Sorry, it's icy.
138
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:23,150
I gotcha.
139
00:06:23,250 --> 00:06:24,380
Thank you.
140
00:06:24,900 --> 00:06:26,259
Yeah, I'm...
141
00:06:26,260 --> 00:06:29,220
I'm doing a series of
"Where Are They Nows."
142
00:06:29,420 --> 00:06:31,920
The next one's on my dignity.
143
00:06:32,020 --> 00:06:34,290
Well, you do what you've
got to do to pay the bills.
144
00:06:34,340 --> 00:06:35,620
Yep.
145
00:06:35,760 --> 00:06:38,410
I still have to put
together a listicle of GIFs
146
00:06:38,510 --> 00:06:39,810
called "Nun fails."
147
00:06:39,910 --> 00:06:41,789
Yeah.
148
00:06:41,790 --> 00:06:43,760
Oh, sorry.
149
00:06:44,510 --> 00:06:47,200
Oh, my God.
150
00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:48,800
I was not prepared for that.
151
00:06:48,880 --> 00:06:49,900
What is it?
152
00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:51,220
My son sent me a picture...
153
00:06:51,250 --> 00:06:52,250
Oh, can I see?
154
00:06:52,260 --> 00:06:53,540
Of his penis.
155
00:06:53,550 --> 00:06:55,260
Did you ask for that?
156
00:06:55,360 --> 00:06:57,489
He's 16, and he thinks
157
00:06:57,490 --> 00:06:58,549
he might have herpes.
158
00:06:59,810 --> 00:07:01,430
And how does it look?
159
00:07:01,530 --> 00:07:04,350
Um, like a teenager who
masturbated too much.
160
00:07:05,810 --> 00:07:08,280
Sounds like you're close.
161
00:07:09,780 --> 00:07:12,120
As a divorced dad,
I try to be there for him
162
00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:13,840
without judgment.
163
00:07:13,940 --> 00:07:16,170
I just don't understand
this generation's need
164
00:07:16,180 --> 00:07:17,850
to share everything.
165
00:07:17,950 --> 00:07:20,250
Well, at least he's not posting
166
00:07:20,270 --> 00:07:22,690
a picture of his penis
online and mushing it into
167
00:07:22,790 --> 00:07:24,650
a loaf of pumpernickel.
168
00:07:24,750 --> 00:07:26,370
What?
169
00:07:26,470 --> 00:07:27,840
Never mind.
170
00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:29,539
Oh!
171
00:07:29,540 --> 00:07:30,700
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my...
172
00:07:30,740 --> 00:07:33,300
- Are... are you okay?
- Oh, my God.
173
00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:36,300
I'm fine. So sorry.
174
00:07:36,400 --> 00:07:38,550
Let me... let me just get my stuff.
175
00:07:38,650 --> 00:07:40,850
- Ohh.
- Ahh.
176
00:07:43,090 --> 00:07:45,120
Here's your license.
177
00:07:45,170 --> 00:07:49,800
And here's your other license.
178
00:07:59,260 --> 00:08:01,010
That's crazy.
179
00:08:01,110 --> 00:08:03,440
You're basically living a double life.
180
00:08:04,470 --> 00:08:05,890
I see it like this.
181
00:08:05,990 --> 00:08:07,959
The world is ageist,
182
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:09,639
and until that changes,
183
00:08:09,640 --> 00:08:10,820
I can't play by the rules.
184
00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:12,420
So true.
185
00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:14,140
You are clever.
186
00:08:14,320 --> 00:08:15,700
I have to be.
187
00:08:15,920 --> 00:08:18,020
I have a daughter in college to support.
188
00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:21,580
And no one has found out?
189
00:08:22,300 --> 00:08:25,450
Well, let me just say that I
wish I didn't have to continue
190
00:08:25,530 --> 00:08:27,529
the charade, but I have to to keep
191
00:08:27,530 --> 00:08:29,070
the millennial brand intact.
192
00:08:29,170 --> 00:08:30,660
Wow.
193
00:08:31,140 --> 00:08:32,760
You are my hero.
194
00:08:32,860 --> 00:08:34,740
I am nobody's hero.
195
00:08:35,540 --> 00:08:36,800
I'm a fraud.
196
00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:40,120
But you do what you have to do.
197
00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:44,330
Well, I can't pretend
to be a hot young woman,
198
00:08:44,430 --> 00:08:47,140
but hopefully I can think of something.
199
00:08:47,780 --> 00:08:49,680
You're so talented.
200
00:08:50,390 --> 00:08:51,500
You will.
201
00:09:04,730 --> 00:09:08,070
Hey, Caitlin, it's... it's me again.
202
00:09:08,170 --> 00:09:10,530
I'm not sure if you got my last message.
203
00:09:10,540 --> 00:09:14,110
I just... just want to see
what you're up to, honey.
204
00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:17,000
If you're satisfied with
your message, hang up...
205
00:09:17,100 --> 00:09:18,440
- Damn it.
- Or press...
206
00:09:20,180 --> 00:09:24,540
_
207
00:09:24,600 --> 00:09:27,239
- _
- What?
208
00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:29,240
_
209
00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:36,020
How was Arianna Huffington's party?
210
00:09:36,030 --> 00:09:37,030
Fine.
211
00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:38,540
Levitt tagged you in a picture.
212
00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:42,540
You and Jake look cozy.
213
00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:45,300
Cozier than an author
and his editor should be.
214
00:09:45,970 --> 00:09:47,000
Calm down.
215
00:09:47,060 --> 00:09:48,219
We look cozy,
216
00:09:48,220 --> 00:09:51,000
because we're sitting on a velvet couch.
217
00:09:51,530 --> 00:09:53,600
Look, I can tell this guy's
got a crush on you.
218
00:09:53,890 --> 00:09:55,719
You're too smart to do something
219
00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:57,800
to jeopardize this book.
220
00:09:57,900 --> 00:09:59,980
You're right. I am.
221
00:10:01,660 --> 00:10:04,000
So I don't need to hear it from you.
222
00:10:21,540 --> 00:10:24,880
_
223
00:10:24,910 --> 00:10:27,500
_
224
00:10:27,570 --> 00:10:29,680
Hey, is this a blow-off?
225
00:10:30,250 --> 00:10:31,889
It seems like he actually has work.
226
00:10:31,890 --> 00:10:33,510
I mean, you can't assume
that everyone's lying
227
00:10:33,530 --> 00:10:35,430
just because you are.
228
00:10:35,530 --> 00:10:37,280
- Hi.
- Hey.
229
00:10:37,380 --> 00:10:39,440
This event is so cool.
230
00:10:39,540 --> 00:10:41,400
I know. I know.
231
00:10:41,500 --> 00:10:43,840
- Lip stain?
- Oh, do I eat it or wear it?
232
00:10:43,940 --> 00:10:46,480
I'm not here to tell you what to do.
233
00:10:46,580 --> 00:10:48,770
I'll try it. I'm starving.
234
00:10:48,870 --> 00:10:50,330
Aren't they great?
235
00:10:50,430 --> 00:10:51,540
Who?
236
00:10:51,580 --> 00:10:53,850
Tam, my assistant. You just met them.
237
00:10:53,950 --> 00:10:55,490
I only saw one person.
238
00:10:55,590 --> 00:10:57,050
Tam is gender-queer.
239
00:10:57,150 --> 00:10:58,780
Gender-queer?
240
00:10:58,880 --> 00:11:00,580
Oh. Oh, so he's bi?
241
00:11:00,680 --> 00:11:02,239
Oh, my God. Liza, no.
Please, do not... no,
242
00:11:02,240 --> 00:11:03,900
do not use that word here.
243
00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:05,900
Tam's pan-sexual, homo-romantic,
244
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,020
and their pronouns are
they, them, and there.
245
00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:09,706
All right, no more
questions. It's offensive.
246
00:11:09,730 --> 00:11:12,350
The LGBTQIAPK community
has been through enough.
247
00:11:12,450 --> 00:11:14,030
You lost me after T.
248
00:11:14,130 --> 00:11:16,630
Lesbian, gay, bisexual,
trans, queer, questioning,
249
00:11:16,730 --> 00:11:19,000
intersex, asexual, pan, poly, kink.
250
00:11:19,020 --> 00:11:20,320
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
251
00:11:20,420 --> 00:11:22,560
Please keep your mingling to a minimum.
252
00:11:22,660 --> 00:11:25,400
Ooh, I was less confused in the closet.
253
00:11:26,460 --> 00:11:27,760
Ooh, how's the mascara?
254
00:11:27,860 --> 00:11:29,530
It tastes like burnt ass.
255
00:11:29,630 --> 00:11:31,570
You know what? I'm gonna
go find some real food.
256
00:11:31,670 --> 00:11:33,210
I'll be back.
257
00:11:33,310 --> 00:11:34,530
Hmm, nutty.
258
00:11:35,960 --> 00:11:37,090
Who are you texting?
259
00:11:37,190 --> 00:11:38,610
Jake Devereux.
260
00:11:38,620 --> 00:11:39,770
The Obama guy?
261
00:11:39,870 --> 00:11:41,620
He's cute and funny.
262
00:11:41,720 --> 00:11:43,420
Uh-oh, you sure that's a good idea.
263
00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:46,400
I hung out with him
last night as his editor.
264
00:11:47,880 --> 00:11:50,120
Okay, and we kissed.
265
00:11:51,370 --> 00:11:52,950
And I think I like him.
266
00:11:53,050 --> 00:11:55,040
- Kelsey.
- I know.
267
00:11:57,330 --> 00:11:58,790
Just eat your mascara.
268
00:12:06,340 --> 00:12:07,560
Tam, lean in.
269
00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:09,379
I will not. This is humiliating.
270
00:12:09,380 --> 00:12:12,660
Oh. Yes. No, you're right.
You're right. Selfies are dead.
271
00:12:12,740 --> 00:12:15,170
Ooh, Maggie, Maggie, will
you take a picture of us?
272
00:12:15,270 --> 00:12:17,500
- Yeah, sure.
- No.
273
00:12:17,830 --> 00:12:19,600
You're making a spectacle.
274
00:12:19,620 --> 00:12:21,410
Yeah, that's the whole point.
275
00:12:21,510 --> 00:12:24,300
Lauren, everything can't be in all-caps.
276
00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:25,780
What do you mean?
277
00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:27,460
Let me put this another way.
278
00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:29,960
It's not cool.
279
00:12:30,560 --> 00:12:31,979
Nobody posts anymore.
280
00:12:31,980 --> 00:12:33,349
It's all word of mouth.
281
00:12:33,350 --> 00:12:36,150
Oh, yes. No, no, okay,
I was just being ironic.
282
00:12:36,250 --> 00:12:37,430
This is for my finsta.
283
00:12:37,530 --> 00:12:38,950
That's "fake Instagram."
284
00:12:39,050 --> 00:12:40,910
Millennials are so sad.
285
00:12:42,970 --> 00:12:44,560
Oh, my God.
286
00:12:44,660 --> 00:12:46,640
Okay, that just happened. I'm old.
287
00:12:46,660 --> 00:12:48,640
- Don't make me choke you out.
- What's wrong?
288
00:12:48,700 --> 00:12:50,159
Tam's being a dick.
289
00:12:50,160 --> 00:12:52,040
They just told Lauren
that she's irrelevant.
290
00:12:52,060 --> 00:12:53,440
They're right, Liza. They are.
291
00:12:53,540 --> 00:12:55,820
They're right. Millennials
are over. We are done.
292
00:12:55,880 --> 00:12:58,500
No, we're still happenin'.
293
00:12:58,670 --> 00:13:00,690
You know, getting older isn't so bad.
294
00:13:01,160 --> 00:13:03,470
Maybe you want to try it sometime.
295
00:13:10,240 --> 00:13:12,620
Hey, what's going on?
296
00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:15,990
You want to come say
good-bye to Inkburg?
297
00:13:16,090 --> 00:13:17,710
What are you talking about?
298
00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:20,310
I'm done with this place, Liza.
299
00:13:21,080 --> 00:13:24,019
Okay, just... you stay right there.
300
00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:26,480
I'm coming over.
301
00:13:39,740 --> 00:13:41,500
Sorry, ma'am, we are closed.
302
00:13:41,870 --> 00:13:44,620
I already got my tattoo, thank you.
303
00:13:45,550 --> 00:13:46,740
What's going on?
304
00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:50,379
My landlord wants me to sign
305
00:13:50,380 --> 00:13:52,920
a ten-year lease or vacate.
306
00:13:52,960 --> 00:13:54,480
Whoa, look who's an adult.
307
00:13:57,260 --> 00:13:58,820
I think I'm gonna vacate.
308
00:13:59,740 --> 00:14:01,380
Wh... you're gonna give Inkburg up?
309
00:14:02,410 --> 00:14:04,100
What are you gonna do instead?
310
00:14:04,120 --> 00:14:05,400
Anything, really.
311
00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:08,059
I could rent a chair
312
00:14:08,060 --> 00:14:09,859
at a tattoo shop in Portland,
313
00:14:09,860 --> 00:14:11,180
Silver Lake.
314
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:13,500
This place is your passion, your soul.
315
00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:17,419
I just don't know if there's
316
00:14:17,420 --> 00:14:19,599
anything here for me anymore.
317
00:14:23,220 --> 00:14:24,419
I don't know if I have it in me
318
00:14:24,420 --> 00:14:25,860
to make any more commitments.
319
00:14:26,540 --> 00:14:27,860
Are you kidding?
320
00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:31,340
This is a commitment.
321
00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:32,999
This is a commitment.
322
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:36,000
All of these are
commitments to yourself.
323
00:14:36,020 --> 00:14:38,560
You can't go wrong
committing to yourself.
324
00:14:38,960 --> 00:14:40,560
Trust me.
325
00:14:43,700 --> 00:14:44,960
Trust you.
326
00:14:47,360 --> 00:14:49,440
How can I be sure
327
00:14:49,980 --> 00:14:53,400
that this place is my future?
328
00:14:54,980 --> 00:14:57,520
And what's keeping me here?
329
00:14:58,100 --> 00:15:00,000
You've got all of us,
330
00:15:00,990 --> 00:15:04,720
Maggie and Kelsey, and you've got me.
331
00:15:09,070 --> 00:15:13,140
No, I don't have you.
332
00:15:19,940 --> 00:15:22,510
I'm gonna clean up a little bit.
333
00:15:27,090 --> 00:15:30,270
Good night, Liza.
334
00:15:40,720 --> 00:15:44,260
_
335
00:15:52,860 --> 00:15:54,880
- Liza Miller speaking.
- Hi, there.
336
00:15:54,920 --> 00:15:57,040
This is May from "Vanity Fair."
337
00:15:57,080 --> 00:15:59,540
I'm checking some details
for a story about you.
338
00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:00,820
About me?
339
00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:03,140
- You and "Millennial."
- Oh, okay.
340
00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:06,289
I see here that you are
one of the co-founders
341
00:16:06,290 --> 00:16:07,640
of "Millennial Print."
342
00:16:07,890 --> 00:16:10,960
- Yes.
- And that you're 41.
343
00:16:12,740 --> 00:16:15,700
Uh... who's writing this article?
344
00:16:15,940 --> 00:16:18,080
Don Ridley. Can we confirm your age?
345
00:16:19,100 --> 00:16:21,419
Hey, we're late for the Reese meeting.
346
00:16:21,420 --> 00:16:22,640
Okay, I've got to go. Bye-bye.
347
00:16:22,740 --> 00:16:24,340
Let's go. Let's go.
348
00:16:26,100 --> 00:16:27,300
Come on.
349
00:16:28,470 --> 00:16:30,189
You told Don your real age?
350
00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:33,100
No, he saw both my IDs
when I slipped on ice
351
00:16:33,110 --> 00:16:34,330
and dropped my bag.
352
00:16:34,430 --> 00:16:36,340
Well, why didn't you make up a story,
353
00:16:36,440 --> 00:16:39,220
like, tell him you were trying
to get discounts or something?
354
00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:41,180
- On what?
- I don't know.
355
00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:42,540
What do old people buy?
356
00:16:42,620 --> 00:16:44,980
I'm not a senior citizen,
and that's not the point.
357
00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:47,780
"Vanity Fair" is going to
publish an article exposing me.
358
00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:48,800
What?
359
00:16:50,810 --> 00:16:52,710
Oh, my God. They're calling me now.
360
00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:53,720
Don't answer it.
361
00:16:53,740 --> 00:16:55,510
Okay, we cannot deal with this.
362
00:16:55,610 --> 00:16:58,219
Whatever we do, we cannot
let Reese's people know.
363
00:16:58,220 --> 00:16:59,360
Not a word.
364
00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:00,520
Ahh.
365
00:17:00,620 --> 00:17:01,780
Okay, let me see.
366
00:17:02,980 --> 00:17:04,280
New phone. Who dis?
367
00:17:11,140 --> 00:17:13,050
I received a very unsettling phone call
368
00:17:13,080 --> 00:17:14,356
from a fact-checker this morning.
369
00:17:14,380 --> 00:17:16,139
She was insinuating something very odd
370
00:17:16,140 --> 00:17:17,639
about your age.
371
00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:18,760
Reese is in pieces.
372
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:22,260
Liza, how old are you?
373
00:17:23,480 --> 00:17:24,720
I'm...
374
00:17:28,690 --> 00:17:30,630
Age-queer.
375
00:17:30,730 --> 00:17:32,600
- What?
- I'm age-queer.
376
00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:34,719
That fact-checker was trying to
377
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:35,879
age-shame us for being young,
378
00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:38,960
so I told them I'm old in protest.
379
00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:40,160
And it's, like, who cares?
380
00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:41,920
I don't identify as any age.
381
00:17:41,950 --> 00:17:42,980
Neither do I.
382
00:17:43,080 --> 00:17:44,719
They were so focused on how successful
383
00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:45,979
we were for our age,
384
00:17:45,980 --> 00:17:47,880
and it shouldn't matter how old we are.
385
00:17:47,980 --> 00:17:49,010
Exactly.
386
00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:50,160
Screw them.
387
00:17:50,180 --> 00:17:51,250
Who's them?
388
00:17:51,350 --> 00:17:52,360
The patriarchy.
389
00:17:52,790 --> 00:17:54,050
So I told them I'm 41.
390
00:17:54,150 --> 00:17:56,050
And let them think that for all I care.
391
00:17:56,150 --> 00:17:57,320
We're post-age.
392
00:17:57,710 --> 00:18:00,980
But how old... I'm confused.
393
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:03,660
It's confusing, but it's not wrong.
394
00:18:03,760 --> 00:18:05,860
- Mm-mm.
- Every time you get a bunch of
395
00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:07,780
strong, powerful women together,
396
00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:10,020
it's their looks, their age.
397
00:18:10,040 --> 00:18:11,236
They're too young. They're too sexy.
398
00:18:11,260 --> 00:18:13,910
What are they gonna do, throw
us in "The Handmaid's Tale"?
399
00:18:14,010 --> 00:18:15,360
Under his eye, girl.
400
00:18:17,480 --> 00:18:20,180
Kiara, it's that fact-checker again.
401
00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:23,640
I'll handle them.
402
00:18:28,300 --> 00:18:29,880
- Age-queer?
- I...
403
00:18:29,980 --> 00:18:32,880
- That was insane.
- Yeah, and probably offensive.
404
00:18:32,900 --> 00:18:35,280
Liza, we have to stop this story.
405
00:18:35,300 --> 00:18:36,369
I know.
406
00:18:36,370 --> 00:18:37,890
I'm gonna go find Don right now.
407
00:18:37,990 --> 00:18:39,410
Before he stopped texting, he mentioned
408
00:18:39,430 --> 00:18:40,810
a luncheon for Broadway Cares.
409
00:18:40,910 --> 00:18:42,220
That's a nice charity.
410
00:18:42,300 --> 00:18:45,180
The only thing Don cares
about is the free food.
411
00:19:06,500 --> 00:19:07,740
Don.
412
00:19:08,330 --> 00:19:09,340
Liza.
413
00:19:09,380 --> 00:19:11,040
I was the story you were working on.
414
00:19:11,060 --> 00:19:13,200
How could you do that to me?
415
00:19:13,300 --> 00:19:15,170
I thought that I met a man that I liked,
416
00:19:15,270 --> 00:19:17,130
that I trusted.
417
00:19:17,230 --> 00:19:18,930
I'm sorry.
418
00:19:19,030 --> 00:19:21,580
I'm a freelancer. I
need to dig up stories.
419
00:19:21,600 --> 00:19:23,330
And you're a really great one.
420
00:19:23,430 --> 00:19:24,800
You said it yourself.
421
00:19:24,820 --> 00:19:26,080
You do what you have to do.
422
00:19:26,140 --> 00:19:28,860
Not at the expense of
destroying someone else.
423
00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:30,340
This story might end up being
424
00:19:30,350 --> 00:19:31,660
the best thing that
ever happened to you.
425
00:19:31,680 --> 00:19:33,296
I could make you the
poster child for ageism.
426
00:19:33,320 --> 00:19:35,259
And also kill my career
427
00:19:35,260 --> 00:19:37,480
and damage "Millennial."
428
00:19:39,020 --> 00:19:41,140
Well, none of that's gonna happen.
429
00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:42,500
They just pulled it.
430
00:19:42,600 --> 00:19:44,590
There's some social media
thing that's exploding
431
00:19:44,610 --> 00:19:46,519
about being age-queer,
432
00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:48,060
whatever that means.
433
00:19:48,100 --> 00:19:51,040
Suddenly everyone's
sensitive to age-shaming.
434
00:19:51,140 --> 00:19:52,920
Oh, wow.
435
00:19:53,280 --> 00:19:54,560
Good.
436
00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:56,290
They should be sensitive to it.
437
00:19:56,390 --> 00:19:58,420
Yeah, and once again, I'm out.
438
00:19:58,480 --> 00:19:59,879
You know, it seems like
the only people who get
439
00:19:59,880 --> 00:20:01,679
discriminated against
anymore are middle-aged
440
00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:03,020
straight white men.
441
00:20:03,140 --> 00:20:04,859
#me, okay?
442
00:20:04,860 --> 00:20:05,980
#me.
443
00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:09,680
You know, I think I might
know why you can't find work.
444
00:20:09,820 --> 00:20:10,860
And why is that?
445
00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:13,220
Because you're an asshole, Don.
446
00:20:24,380 --> 00:20:25,720
You're an adult.
447
00:20:25,780 --> 00:20:27,280
Your life is your life.
448
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,280
But why are you smashing
your face into bread?
449
00:20:29,360 --> 00:20:31,040
Oh, my God. How did you see that?
450
00:20:31,060 --> 00:20:32,620
I feel like I don't know you anymore.
451
00:20:32,660 --> 00:20:34,019
Mom, it's not who I am.
452
00:20:34,020 --> 00:20:35,399
It's just a thing I do
for some extra money.
453
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:36,880
Okay, let me tell you something.
454
00:20:36,940 --> 00:20:39,660
You become what you do.
455
00:20:39,720 --> 00:20:41,900
If you cheat, you become a cheater.
456
00:20:42,020 --> 00:20:45,530
If you lie, you... you become a liar.
457
00:20:45,560 --> 00:20:47,730
It's so easy for you. You're so perfect.
458
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:50,560
Caitlin, I have done plenty
of things in my life
459
00:20:50,570 --> 00:20:51,860
that I am not proud of.
460
00:20:51,940 --> 00:20:53,260
Like what?
461
00:20:54,400 --> 00:20:56,360
Someday I will tell you all about them.
462
00:20:56,640 --> 00:21:01,220
But for now, will you
just stop breadfacing?
463
00:21:01,250 --> 00:21:02,890
Jeez, Mom, is it really
that embarrassing?
464
00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:08,280
What?
465
00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:12,580
- Ohh.
- Mom.
466
00:21:12,700 --> 00:21:14,439
- Oh, this is surprising.
- Mom, stop.
467
00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:16,580
- People are watching.
- Ooh, it's so soft.
468
00:21:16,660 --> 00:21:19,770
Ohh, yeah. Mmm.
469
00:21:19,870 --> 00:21:22,020
Okay, okay, I'll stop.
470
00:21:23,720 --> 00:21:25,880
God, you could really ruin anything.
471
00:21:26,110 --> 00:21:27,420
I love you too.
472
00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:30,100
Are you still gonna eat it?
473
00:21:30,140 --> 00:21:32,000
Of course I'm gonna eat that bread.
474
00:21:33,360 --> 00:21:34,980
I liked it on my chin.
475
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:36,960
- Yep.
- It was really crispy.
476
00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:53,979
Hey.
477
00:21:53,980 --> 00:21:55,119
What are you doing here?
478
00:21:55,120 --> 00:21:56,720
Josh, I can't let you do this.
479
00:21:57,140 --> 00:21:59,250
Who knows what the future holds,
480
00:21:59,260 --> 00:22:02,160
but I know how much you love that place.
481
00:22:02,510 --> 00:22:03,860
This was your dream.
482
00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:05,370
You built it from nothing.
483
00:22:05,380 --> 00:22:07,040
It's who you are.
484
00:22:07,120 --> 00:22:08,660
Take that lease.
485
00:22:09,380 --> 00:22:11,050
I'm not going away.
486
00:22:11,060 --> 00:22:13,340
Kelsey and Maggie aren't going away.
487
00:22:13,460 --> 00:22:15,020
Your roots are here.
488
00:22:15,360 --> 00:22:17,300
I will be at your side.
489
00:22:17,560 --> 00:22:20,240
You don't have to commit to
us, but we commit to you.
490
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:21,640
I commit to you.
491
00:22:22,940 --> 00:22:25,390
I might not always be the
same person in your life,
492
00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:28,500
but I will always be in your life.
493
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:32,400
What are you talking about?
494
00:22:32,880 --> 00:22:35,060
The sign. They're taking it down.
495
00:22:38,340 --> 00:22:40,380
I'm just getting a bigger one.
496
00:22:40,700 --> 00:22:41,900
What?
497
00:22:43,420 --> 00:22:45,430
Josh.
498
00:22:46,430 --> 00:22:48,290
I'm not ready to give up yet.
499
00:22:56,940 --> 00:22:59,790
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
33482
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.