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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,333 --> 00:00:06,609 Hey, Calvin. 2 00:00:06,634 --> 00:00:07,742 Hey, how was your run? 3 00:00:07,767 --> 00:00:10,632 Oh, it was great; I did five miles but I could really use... 4 00:00:14,735 --> 00:00:16,182 some new shoes. 5 00:00:16,623 --> 00:00:18,041 Oh, my bad. 6 00:00:18,066 --> 00:00:19,853 I thought you were gonna say "cool down." 7 00:00:20,585 --> 00:00:22,008 Hey, did you see the ambulance 8 00:00:22,033 --> 00:00:23,545 in front of Mr. Benson's last night? 9 00:00:23,570 --> 00:00:24,671 Yeah. 10 00:00:24,711 --> 00:00:26,195 Any idea what happened? I want to get some intel 11 00:00:26,219 --> 00:00:28,359 so I can update our neighborhood Facebook page. 12 00:00:28,656 --> 00:00:30,874 We have a neighborhood Facebook page? 13 00:00:30,899 --> 00:00:32,233 How many people are on it? 14 00:00:32,258 --> 00:00:33,484 Well, as soon as you accept 15 00:00:33,509 --> 00:00:35,369 my friend request, two. 16 00:00:36,957 --> 00:00:38,835 So do you know what happened to Mr. Benson? 17 00:00:38,931 --> 00:00:40,023 Yeah. 18 00:00:40,134 --> 00:00:41,273 He dead. 19 00:00:41,298 --> 00:00:43,950 Whoa, wha-what? Calvin. 20 00:00:43,975 --> 00:00:45,797 That... that's terrible. 21 00:00:46,041 --> 00:00:47,834 You wouldn't say that if you knew him. 22 00:00:47,937 --> 00:00:49,078 I mean... 23 00:00:49,316 --> 00:00:50,836 there's a reason that people in this neighborhood 24 00:00:50,861 --> 00:00:52,702 called him "Mean Mr. Benson." 25 00:00:53,390 --> 00:00:55,177 I didn't know they called him that. 26 00:00:55,202 --> 00:00:56,483 Yeah, probably like you don't know 27 00:00:56,508 --> 00:00:58,225 they call you "Bobblehead Dave." 28 00:01:00,010 --> 00:01:01,896 Oh, I know it and I love it. 29 00:01:03,773 --> 00:01:05,650 So what was so mean about Mr. Benson? 30 00:01:05,675 --> 00:01:07,777 Oh, everything. The man has terrorized 31 00:01:07,802 --> 00:01:09,304 this neighborhood since I was a kid. 32 00:01:09,417 --> 00:01:12,295 Always yelling at people to cut their grass 33 00:01:12,320 --> 00:01:14,199 or pull their trash cans up. 34 00:01:14,224 --> 00:01:17,625 And if ever I had a ball or a Frisbee go into his yard, 35 00:01:17,807 --> 00:01:19,016 never saw it again. 36 00:01:19,041 --> 00:01:21,308 You know, that actually reminds me. 37 00:01:21,333 --> 00:01:23,000 I accidentally threw our Frisbee 38 00:01:23,025 --> 00:01:24,752 into your backyard the other day. 39 00:01:24,941 --> 00:01:26,494 - Green one? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 40 00:01:26,519 --> 00:01:28,041 Haven't seen it. 41 00:01:29,304 --> 00:01:30,848 Well, you know... 42 00:01:31,078 --> 00:01:33,200 I'm sure Mr. Benson wasn't all bad. 43 00:01:33,225 --> 00:01:34,544 I mean, take my Aunt Phyllis. 44 00:01:34,569 --> 00:01:36,720 Nobody liked her, but once you got over the fact 45 00:01:36,745 --> 00:01:38,513 that she treated her pets better than people 46 00:01:38,538 --> 00:01:40,645 and pretty much despised all of humanity, 47 00:01:40,670 --> 00:01:43,938 she made the most delicious rhubarb pie. 48 00:01:44,919 --> 00:01:47,629 Well, Mr. Benson was so mean, 49 00:01:47,654 --> 00:01:50,231 not even the Jehovah's Witnesses would knock on his door. 50 00:01:50,378 --> 00:01:51,716 And they talk to anybody. 51 00:01:52,005 --> 00:01:53,824 I know, aren't they the best? 52 00:01:54,987 --> 00:01:57,605 But then they're always like, "We got to go now, Dave." 53 00:01:59,765 --> 00:02:01,579 So, do you know when they're having his funeral? 54 00:02:01,604 --> 00:02:03,565 I don't know. He was such a loner. 55 00:02:03,590 --> 00:02:04,909 There probably won't be one. 56 00:02:05,128 --> 00:02:07,314 And even if there was, no one would go. 57 00:02:07,787 --> 00:02:09,840 Man, that's so sad, Calvin. 58 00:02:10,340 --> 00:02:11,675 - Yeah... - We should do something 59 00:02:11,700 --> 00:02:13,037 to remember him. 60 00:02:13,174 --> 00:02:16,557 We should put his death on the neighborhood Facebook page. 61 00:02:16,741 --> 00:02:18,805 What... So you'll accept my friend request? 62 00:02:18,830 --> 00:02:21,315 Sure. Just as soon as he does. 63 00:02:27,299 --> 00:02:31,089 - Synced and corrected by martythecrazy - - www.addic7ed.com - 64 00:02:33,838 --> 00:02:35,016 Mm. 65 00:02:35,041 --> 00:02:36,157 Oh. 66 00:02:36,483 --> 00:02:37,825 Okay. 67 00:02:38,308 --> 00:02:40,953 "Ten Ways to Please Your Man." 68 00:02:43,229 --> 00:02:44,498 All right, well, let's see 69 00:02:44,523 --> 00:02:46,667 what's on the menu for this weekend. 70 00:02:47,484 --> 00:02:49,503 Okay, okay, I ain't mad at that. 71 00:02:50,157 --> 00:02:51,542 I see you, number seven. 72 00:02:51,567 --> 00:02:53,632 Okay. 73 00:02:53,743 --> 00:02:55,627 Oh, number nine, you just a little ol' freak. 74 00:02:57,605 --> 00:03:00,347 Let's see what number ten is... Oh, hell no. 75 00:03:01,364 --> 00:03:02,531 No, nuh-uh, oh. 76 00:03:02,556 --> 00:03:04,226 No, uh-uh. 77 00:03:05,981 --> 00:03:07,022 Oh. 78 00:03:08,804 --> 00:03:10,440 - Hey, babe. - Oh, hey, Calvin. 79 00:03:10,465 --> 00:03:12,424 Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's all this? 80 00:03:12,449 --> 00:03:14,352 Well, we just came from the church meeting 81 00:03:14,377 --> 00:03:15,886 about Mr. Benson passing. 82 00:03:15,911 --> 00:03:17,049 And since he didn't have any people, 83 00:03:17,074 --> 00:03:19,525 I offered to throw the repass here. 84 00:03:19,550 --> 00:03:21,018 - What? - And then I discovered 85 00:03:21,043 --> 00:03:23,486 that a repass was kind of like a funeral after-party 86 00:03:23,511 --> 00:03:25,666 and we were off to the races. 87 00:03:26,968 --> 00:03:28,705 Uh, hold on, Tina. 88 00:03:28,842 --> 00:03:32,065 We're not hosting a repass for somebody I hated. 89 00:03:32,344 --> 00:03:34,882 I wouldn't host one for myself and I love me. 90 00:03:36,934 --> 00:03:38,674 Look, I didn't like him any more than you 91 00:03:38,699 --> 00:03:40,630 but it's the Christian thing to do and besides, 92 00:03:40,655 --> 00:03:42,948 I've thrown plenty of stuff for you that I didn't want to. 93 00:03:42,973 --> 00:03:45,259 - Like what? - Like that end of the year banquet 94 00:03:45,284 --> 00:03:47,018 for your bowling team where you all just 95 00:03:47,043 --> 00:03:48,729 sat around and complained about being robbed. 96 00:03:49,007 --> 00:03:50,897 They overwaxed the lanes, Tina. 97 00:03:54,103 --> 00:03:56,667 You know, this repass has your name 98 00:03:56,692 --> 00:03:58,065 written all over it. 99 00:03:58,090 --> 00:03:59,299 Oh, you mean like my Frisbee? 100 00:03:59,324 --> 00:04:00,407 Hey... 101 00:04:01,778 --> 00:04:03,643 Calvin, don't worry, okay? 102 00:04:03,668 --> 00:04:05,862 I'm pitching in, too: I'm picking up flowers 103 00:04:05,887 --> 00:04:07,634 and I volunteered to say a few words on 104 00:04:07,659 --> 00:04:10,416 - on Mr. Benson's behalf. - But you didn't even know the man. 105 00:04:10,441 --> 00:04:11,735 And I'm about to change that. 106 00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:13,073 I'm gonna ask people in the neighborhood 107 00:04:13,098 --> 00:04:14,515 for their fond memories of him. 108 00:04:14,740 --> 00:04:16,715 Oh, okay. Here's one. 109 00:04:16,890 --> 00:04:18,572 For Halloween, he threw rocks at me 110 00:04:18,597 --> 00:04:21,470 and yelled at me, "Get off my lawn, Wack Ninja!" 111 00:04:22,995 --> 00:04:24,799 I wasn't even a ninja, Dave. 112 00:04:24,824 --> 00:04:26,174 I was a black ghost. 113 00:04:26,199 --> 00:04:28,307 Okay. 114 00:04:28,450 --> 00:04:30,328 Calvin, I've never seen a black ghost. 115 00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:32,276 Well, trust me. In this neighborhood, 116 00:04:32,300 --> 00:04:34,096 you don't want to walk around with a white sheet 117 00:04:34,121 --> 00:04:36,010 - over your head. - Okay. 118 00:04:36,855 --> 00:04:39,897 Fine, you know what? Maybe Mr. Benson was 119 00:04:39,922 --> 00:04:41,369 a little bit grumpy. 120 00:04:41,394 --> 00:04:43,502 But I believe that if you look hard enough, 121 00:04:43,527 --> 00:04:45,377 there's something nice to say about everybody. 122 00:04:45,402 --> 00:04:48,056 Oh, see? This is about your bitter old aunt 123 00:04:48,081 --> 00:04:49,757 and her bitter rhubarb pie. 124 00:04:49,782 --> 00:04:51,112 Oh, no, no, no. 125 00:04:51,454 --> 00:04:52,987 My aunt was bitter. 126 00:04:53,012 --> 00:04:55,705 The rhubarb pie was incredible, Calvin. 127 00:04:59,135 --> 00:05:02,012 It's so nice of you guys to host Mr. Benson's repass. 128 00:05:02,037 --> 00:05:04,049 Well, it's the right thing to do. 129 00:05:04,074 --> 00:05:05,096 Get the neighborhood together, 130 00:05:05,121 --> 00:05:07,640 everybody brings food and bam! 131 00:05:07,723 --> 00:05:09,400 There's enough leftovers that Mama doesn't 132 00:05:09,425 --> 00:05:11,477 have to cook for a week. 133 00:05:12,742 --> 00:05:13,924 Hey, Mom. 134 00:05:13,949 --> 00:05:15,064 Hi, sweetie. 135 00:05:15,257 --> 00:05:17,317 I've been thinking about Mr. Benson. 136 00:05:17,342 --> 00:05:19,092 Where do people go when they die? 137 00:05:19,526 --> 00:05:20,988 Oh, um... 138 00:05:21,013 --> 00:05:22,764 uh, well... 139 00:05:23,019 --> 00:05:24,616 that's a good question. 140 00:05:24,660 --> 00:05:27,496 And the answer is very complicated. 141 00:05:27,715 --> 00:05:29,752 You see, existence is a complex thing... 142 00:05:29,777 --> 00:05:31,539 Do you know, Miss Tina? 143 00:05:32,602 --> 00:05:35,002 Well, of course I do. 144 00:05:35,105 --> 00:05:38,510 If you're good, you go to this glorious place 145 00:05:38,535 --> 00:05:41,315 in the sky called Heaven, filled with angels 146 00:05:41,340 --> 00:05:43,721 and toys and all the candy you can eat. 147 00:05:43,931 --> 00:05:45,065 Cool. 148 00:05:45,090 --> 00:05:47,264 See, Mom? Simple. 149 00:05:50,297 --> 00:05:52,672 Well, that wasn't exactly the answer I was gonna give. 150 00:05:52,697 --> 00:05:55,033 I know, girl, but I got a repass to plan. 151 00:05:55,058 --> 00:05:57,609 We would have been here all day. 152 00:05:57,937 --> 00:05:59,626 I didn't even think about all the questions 153 00:05:59,651 --> 00:06:01,414 this was gonna raise for Grover. 154 00:06:01,439 --> 00:06:03,742 Well, why don't you just tell him what you think? 155 00:06:03,767 --> 00:06:06,188 Because that's exactly what my parents did to me. 156 00:06:06,213 --> 00:06:07,948 They told me what to believe. 157 00:06:07,973 --> 00:06:10,663 I-I'd rather have Grover figure it out for himself. 158 00:06:10,688 --> 00:06:11,939 I respect that. 159 00:06:12,157 --> 00:06:14,375 I mean, it's blasphemous, but I respect it. 160 00:06:18,833 --> 00:06:20,213 Hmm. 161 00:06:21,326 --> 00:06:23,049 And what's this? 162 00:06:27,792 --> 00:06:31,725 Looks like somebody wants an early birthday present. 163 00:06:34,528 --> 00:06:35,960 - Hey, babe. - Hey. 164 00:06:35,985 --> 00:06:37,946 Got the food for the repass. 165 00:06:41,969 --> 00:06:44,789 Calvin, what is this? I told you to get finger foods. 166 00:06:44,814 --> 00:06:45,863 Oh, I did. 167 00:06:45,888 --> 00:06:48,409 You can eat these day-old bagels with your fingers. 168 00:06:50,286 --> 00:06:52,079 Oh, he's just being cheap because 169 00:06:52,104 --> 00:06:53,633 Mean Mr. Benson never paid him 170 00:06:53,658 --> 00:06:55,999 for mowing the lawn in the summer of '79. 171 00:06:56,191 --> 00:06:57,583 Oh, I'm sorry. 172 00:06:57,608 --> 00:06:59,753 Is there a statute of limitations 173 00:06:59,778 --> 00:07:01,879 on making a black ghost cry? 174 00:07:02,899 --> 00:07:04,226 Calvin, don't you think 175 00:07:04,251 --> 00:07:05,367 you're being a little ridiculous? 176 00:07:05,392 --> 00:07:06,726 Just let it go. 177 00:07:06,751 --> 00:07:07,664 Oh. 178 00:07:07,689 --> 00:07:09,346 This from the lady who had to switch 179 00:07:09,371 --> 00:07:11,496 grocery stores for being called out 180 00:07:11,521 --> 00:07:14,725 for having more than 12 items in the express lane. 181 00:07:15,453 --> 00:07:17,788 If they're gonna count gum as an item, 182 00:07:17,813 --> 00:07:19,647 it shouldn't be at the register. 183 00:07:22,014 --> 00:07:23,164 Hey, hey. 184 00:07:23,257 --> 00:07:24,611 Turns out half my childhood 185 00:07:24,636 --> 00:07:27,432 was in Mean Mr. Benson's backyard. 186 00:07:28,551 --> 00:07:30,160 Oh, lookee here. 187 00:07:30,185 --> 00:07:32,285 It's Marty's little army doll. 188 00:07:32,310 --> 00:07:34,974 Hey, man. He was a prisoner of war 189 00:07:34,999 --> 00:07:36,289 for 15 years. 190 00:07:38,996 --> 00:07:40,627 Welcome home, soldier. 191 00:07:42,059 --> 00:07:44,297 So much has changed. 192 00:07:44,591 --> 00:07:45,923 Oh, what's that? 193 00:07:45,948 --> 00:07:47,993 Oh, no, Malcolm still lives here. 194 00:07:51,180 --> 00:07:52,973 Mom, what's a massage parlor? 195 00:07:52,998 --> 00:07:54,599 What? What... 196 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:57,101 Why would you ask that? 197 00:07:57,362 --> 00:07:59,614 I'm looking for Heaven on Google Maps 198 00:07:59,639 --> 00:08:02,100 and it says it's a massage parlor in Koreatown. 199 00:08:02,125 --> 00:08:03,919 Oh, okay, I-I, uh... 200 00:08:04,305 --> 00:08:07,154 I think that's enough screen time for today. 201 00:08:07,509 --> 00:08:08,988 Hey. 202 00:08:09,164 --> 00:08:10,563 I've been meaning to talk to you about 203 00:08:10,588 --> 00:08:12,326 what Miss Tina said about Heaven. 204 00:08:12,389 --> 00:08:14,577 - Okay. - It's just that 205 00:08:14,602 --> 00:08:18,396 not everyone sees "heaven" the same way Miss Tina does. 206 00:08:18,421 --> 00:08:20,083 - They don't? - No. 207 00:08:20,535 --> 00:08:22,880 For example, some people believe that heaven 208 00:08:22,905 --> 00:08:24,575 exists inside your heart. 209 00:08:24,731 --> 00:08:28,025 And others believe that heaven is here on Earth 210 00:08:28,050 --> 00:08:29,883 and that our souls just keep coming back 211 00:08:29,908 --> 00:08:33,046 as a new being, like a turtle or a horse. 212 00:08:33,071 --> 00:08:36,225 Cool. I want to come back as a dung beetle. 213 00:08:36,626 --> 00:08:37,953 What? 214 00:08:38,377 --> 00:08:39,977 Why would you want that? 215 00:08:40,002 --> 00:08:41,982 It's the world's strongest insect. 216 00:08:42,007 --> 00:08:45,178 It can carry a thousand times its body weight. 217 00:08:45,506 --> 00:08:47,860 Yes. Of dung. 218 00:08:48,146 --> 00:08:49,971 I know! 219 00:08:50,820 --> 00:08:53,303 Hey, Dad, I'm gonna be a dung beetle. 220 00:08:53,328 --> 00:08:55,844 Oh, awesome, buddy. World's strongest insect. 221 00:08:57,666 --> 00:08:59,122 - Hey, babe. - Hey. 222 00:08:59,147 --> 00:09:01,352 Did you have any luck finding out about Mr. Benson? 223 00:09:01,377 --> 00:09:04,839 No. I went door-to-door through the entire neighborhood 224 00:09:04,864 --> 00:09:06,532 and the only thing I heard about him 225 00:09:06,557 --> 00:09:08,070 was that he was from New Orleans 226 00:09:08,095 --> 00:09:10,716 and they wish he had died there. 227 00:09:11,936 --> 00:09:14,387 Geez, he sounds like a real Aunt Phyllis. 228 00:09:15,134 --> 00:09:16,556 I know, but you... 229 00:09:16,581 --> 00:09:19,058 I'm not giving up until I find his rhubarb pie. 230 00:09:19,376 --> 00:09:20,560 And you will. 231 00:09:20,619 --> 00:09:23,063 Because you can find the good in anybody. 232 00:09:23,088 --> 00:09:24,273 Thank you. 233 00:09:24,298 --> 00:09:25,649 But you really got to stop inviting 234 00:09:25,674 --> 00:09:28,026 the Jehovah's Witnesses to stay for dinner. 235 00:09:32,648 --> 00:09:34,844 Hey, Miss Kim. Uh, I knocked on your door 236 00:09:34,869 --> 00:09:36,414 earlier, but I guess you weren't home. 237 00:09:36,559 --> 00:09:38,180 Oh, no, I was there. 238 00:09:38,205 --> 00:09:40,290 I saw you, Bobblehead Dave. 239 00:09:41,565 --> 00:09:43,416 I, well, you know, I was just wondering 240 00:09:43,441 --> 00:09:45,524 if you had any positive memories about Mr. Benson 241 00:09:45,549 --> 00:09:47,614 - from before he died. - No. 242 00:09:47,779 --> 00:09:49,422 That old bastard. 243 00:09:51,782 --> 00:09:54,927 Tina, how much did we pay for all this food? 244 00:09:55,120 --> 00:09:56,955 About a half a bowling party, 245 00:09:56,980 --> 00:09:59,932 not including the trophies you bought yourselves. 246 00:10:01,069 --> 00:10:02,903 Well, I think it's a waste of our money 247 00:10:02,935 --> 00:10:04,565 and a waste of our hospitality. 248 00:10:04,590 --> 00:10:06,466 And why nobody eating these bagels? Oh, no. 249 00:10:12,209 --> 00:10:13,613 They're delicious. 250 00:10:15,057 --> 00:10:17,451 Oh, shoot, here comes Miss Kim. Hide me. 251 00:10:17,476 --> 00:10:19,852 - Oop... Too late. - No, no, no. 252 00:10:20,653 --> 00:10:22,625 Oh, Marty. 253 00:10:22,650 --> 00:10:24,957 Aren't you looking like a whole snack? 254 00:10:26,667 --> 00:10:28,460 Uh, don't you mean Malcolm? 255 00:10:28,485 --> 00:10:30,464 Ah, Malcolm got too old. 256 00:10:32,366 --> 00:10:34,661 Well, little brother, do not break her heart. 257 00:10:34,923 --> 00:10:36,095 Or her hip. 258 00:10:37,995 --> 00:10:40,351 Marty, you know, I need someone young 259 00:10:40,376 --> 00:10:41,974 to keep up with me and... 260 00:10:41,999 --> 00:10:44,353 you look like you've been working out. 261 00:10:46,286 --> 00:10:48,649 Well, you know, I have been taking the stairs at work. 262 00:10:52,217 --> 00:10:54,462 Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. 263 00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:56,531 You want to run, go outside. 264 00:10:57,249 --> 00:10:59,243 And who left my door open? 265 00:10:59,268 --> 00:11:02,031 I'm not trying to air condition the whole neighborhood. 266 00:11:03,094 --> 00:11:04,633 You don't have the A/C on. 267 00:11:04,658 --> 00:11:06,376 Well, they don't know that. 268 00:11:07,193 --> 00:11:09,319 Hey, little boy, come on, get out of my chair. 269 00:11:09,381 --> 00:11:10,665 You don't have a job, 270 00:11:10,690 --> 00:11:13,006 you haven't earned the right to recline. 271 00:11:14,980 --> 00:11:17,552 Fine. Mean Mr. Butler. 272 00:11:17,953 --> 00:11:19,612 W-What'd you call me? 273 00:11:19,637 --> 00:11:22,252 He called you Mean Mr. Butler, you old bastard. 274 00:11:30,981 --> 00:11:32,858 Hey, guys, I really need your help. 275 00:11:32,883 --> 00:11:35,289 It's down to the wire and no one has said a single nice thing 276 00:11:35,314 --> 00:11:36,649 about Mr. Benson. 277 00:11:36,674 --> 00:11:38,305 Do you have anything I can work with? 278 00:11:38,330 --> 00:11:39,883 Well, there was that one summer he hired us 279 00:11:39,908 --> 00:11:41,676 to plant a vegetable garden. 280 00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:44,469 Oh, right, we grew all those beautiful tomato plants. 281 00:11:44,664 --> 00:11:46,461 That's exactly what I'm looking for. 282 00:11:46,486 --> 00:11:47,711 Yeah, then he pelted us with them 283 00:11:47,736 --> 00:11:50,293 when we rode our bikes on the sidewalk. 284 00:11:51,158 --> 00:11:52,578 Okay, well, uh, 285 00:11:52,603 --> 00:11:54,589 so far, that's the one to beat. 286 00:11:57,208 --> 00:12:00,721 Hey, I just got called Mean Mr. Butler. 287 00:12:00,746 --> 00:12:01,875 What? By who? 288 00:12:01,959 --> 00:12:03,735 That little punk, Apple Head Fred. 289 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:05,178 - Oh. - Oh. 290 00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:07,352 What is he talking about? I'm not mean. 291 00:12:07,633 --> 00:12:11,211 Well, Dad, just last week, you called the city 292 00:12:11,236 --> 00:12:12,578 on Kayla Watkins's lemonade stand 293 00:12:12,603 --> 00:12:14,397 because she didn't have a "permit." 294 00:12:14,615 --> 00:12:16,616 I was looking out for the neighborhood. 295 00:12:16,641 --> 00:12:19,914 That little hustler was cutting the sugar with Sweet'N Low. 296 00:12:21,790 --> 00:12:24,453 Yeah, you're a real pillar of the community, Pop. 297 00:12:24,478 --> 00:12:25,980 That's what I keep saying. 298 00:12:26,461 --> 00:12:28,290 Look, everybody around here loves me. 299 00:12:28,315 --> 00:12:30,193 Especially the kids. You know what? 300 00:12:30,218 --> 00:12:30,821 I'll prove it. 301 00:12:30,846 --> 00:12:31,688 - Oh, no, no. - No. 302 00:12:31,713 --> 00:12:32,840 - No, no, no. - No, don't. No. 303 00:12:32,870 --> 00:12:33,891 No... 304 00:12:35,111 --> 00:12:36,695 Hey, little rascals. 305 00:12:36,879 --> 00:12:38,467 Who wants cake? 306 00:12:41,422 --> 00:12:43,262 M-Mom... 307 00:12:44,707 --> 00:12:46,983 Berlene, you better toughen that little boy up, 308 00:12:47,008 --> 00:12:48,768 'cause he's gonna get beat up in high school. 309 00:12:50,615 --> 00:12:54,070 So has Grover figured out the afterlife for himself yet? 310 00:12:54,357 --> 00:12:55,233 Yep, 311 00:12:55,258 --> 00:12:58,359 and he wants to come back as the world's most disgusting bug. 312 00:13:00,472 --> 00:13:01,907 You must be proud. 313 00:13:02,666 --> 00:13:04,368 You know what? I am. 314 00:13:04,393 --> 00:13:06,496 He's a smart kid. He'll figure it out. 315 00:13:07,381 --> 00:13:08,954 Can I ask you a question? 316 00:13:08,979 --> 00:13:09,946 Sure. 317 00:13:09,971 --> 00:13:11,374 Do you believe in heaven? 318 00:13:12,167 --> 00:13:13,626 Yeah, I do. 319 00:13:13,908 --> 00:13:17,631 But I mean, how can any of us be sure what it's really like? 320 00:13:17,774 --> 00:13:19,466 It's called faith, Gemma. 321 00:13:19,491 --> 00:13:22,377 It's like driving around with an expired license. 322 00:13:22,402 --> 00:13:24,513 You got to trust and believe that you won't get caught. 323 00:13:25,885 --> 00:13:28,808 And so far, I haven't. That's Jesus. 324 00:13:29,038 --> 00:13:32,492 Well, I guess the good thing is we all get to paint 325 00:13:32,517 --> 00:13:34,520 our own picture of what heaven is. 326 00:13:34,545 --> 00:13:36,602 Well, all I know is, in my heaven, 327 00:13:36,627 --> 00:13:38,352 everybody that I love is there. 328 00:13:38,377 --> 00:13:40,694 Ooh, and they're waiting for me at a Prince concert. 329 00:13:42,336 --> 00:13:44,616 In my heaven, it's the Backstreet Boys. 330 00:13:44,641 --> 00:13:46,977 Ooh, and I can eat all the cheesecake I want 331 00:13:47,002 --> 00:13:48,912 and never gain a single pound. 332 00:13:49,322 --> 00:13:52,665 Well, Gemma Johnson, I hope to see you in my heaven. 333 00:13:52,690 --> 00:13:54,834 Aw, I hope I see you in mine. 334 00:13:54,859 --> 00:13:56,633 And if you go first, will you save me a seat 335 00:13:56,658 --> 00:13:59,005 - at your Prince concert? - Oh, most definitely. 336 00:13:59,030 --> 00:14:02,040 And if I go first, I'll save you a spot at the Backstreet Boys. 337 00:14:03,310 --> 00:14:04,430 I'm good. 338 00:14:07,050 --> 00:14:08,724 Hey, Kayla. 339 00:14:08,914 --> 00:14:10,851 - Nice seeing you... - Don't even. 340 00:14:10,876 --> 00:14:13,493 You shut down my lemonade stand. 341 00:14:15,543 --> 00:14:17,003 Snitch. 342 00:14:18,899 --> 00:14:20,810 Well, it's people like you that make it hard 343 00:14:20,835 --> 00:14:22,571 to support black businesses. 344 00:14:26,143 --> 00:14:28,451 Well, okay, to answer your question, Grover, 345 00:14:28,476 --> 00:14:30,867 as scientists, we learn about the law of conservation, 346 00:14:30,992 --> 00:14:32,797 which states that energy can neither be 347 00:14:32,822 --> 00:14:34,674 created nor destroyed. 348 00:14:34,980 --> 00:14:36,979 But if my mama asks, it's what? 349 00:14:37,004 --> 00:14:38,742 All Jesus all the time. 350 00:14:38,767 --> 00:14:40,212 Yeah. 351 00:14:41,421 --> 00:14:42,883 What do you think, Malcolm? 352 00:14:42,908 --> 00:14:44,540 Well, there's actually this great book... 353 00:14:44,565 --> 00:14:45,907 - I'm out. - Yeah, me, too. 354 00:14:48,662 --> 00:14:50,648 So, so, what I'm saying is 355 00:14:50,673 --> 00:14:54,894 that Mean Mr. Benson might just be the most repulsive, 356 00:14:55,299 --> 00:14:58,608 vile, despicable human I've ever come across. 357 00:14:58,943 --> 00:15:02,067 And I hope he rots in hell. 358 00:15:02,671 --> 00:15:04,483 Okay. Well... 359 00:15:05,759 --> 00:15:07,239 Thanks, Reverend. 360 00:15:08,879 --> 00:15:10,381 Hey, Dave. 361 00:15:10,406 --> 00:15:12,078 Thank God, man, look, 362 00:15:12,103 --> 00:15:14,247 I need to hear this. Please tell me, 363 00:15:14,436 --> 00:15:16,626 there's something good in everyone, right? 364 00:15:16,651 --> 00:15:19,419 I wish I could, but it's a lie. 365 00:15:19,591 --> 00:15:21,922 It is a damn, dirty lie. 366 00:15:22,603 --> 00:15:24,634 No, no. Come on, that's not true. 367 00:15:24,659 --> 00:15:27,695 It... no, some people will only be remembered 368 00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:30,125 for yelling at children and bossing people around 369 00:15:30,150 --> 00:15:33,625 and spewing negativity up and down the streets. 370 00:15:33,715 --> 00:15:36,051 Well, when you say it like that, it sounds bad. 371 00:15:37,352 --> 00:15:39,571 Dave, if you're gonna say something, say it now. 372 00:15:39,596 --> 00:15:42,525 These vultures got me down to one day of leftovers. 373 00:15:44,533 --> 00:15:45,946 You know what, Tina? 374 00:15:45,971 --> 00:15:47,472 I don't think I'm going to, 375 00:15:47,497 --> 00:15:49,070 because for the first time in my life, 376 00:15:49,149 --> 00:15:50,740 I don't have anything good to say. 377 00:15:50,765 --> 00:15:53,119 No, Dave, do not talk like that. 378 00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:54,955 Come on, man. 379 00:15:54,980 --> 00:15:56,981 It's like I tell everyone, 380 00:15:57,012 --> 00:15:58,667 if you look hard enough, 381 00:15:58,692 --> 00:16:00,986 you can find the good in everybody. 382 00:16:01,392 --> 00:16:05,798 Dad, you have 100% never said that. 383 00:16:07,045 --> 00:16:08,552 Uh, but you have said, 384 00:16:08,576 --> 00:16:10,524 "I wish The Purge was a real thing." 385 00:16:10,549 --> 00:16:11,531 Yes. 386 00:16:12,641 --> 00:16:14,852 Well, obviously, you just don't know me. 387 00:16:14,984 --> 00:16:16,914 Just like you didn't know Mr. Benson. 388 00:16:17,066 --> 00:16:18,943 Yo, can I have everyone's attention? 389 00:16:19,162 --> 00:16:22,430 Come on. Everybody just gather around here. Come on, now. 390 00:16:22,849 --> 00:16:25,985 We are here to celebrate the life of a great man. 391 00:16:26,010 --> 00:16:28,698 Oh, wait. Someone else die? 392 00:16:29,765 --> 00:16:33,034 No. I'm talking about Mr. Benson, 393 00:16:33,233 --> 00:16:37,336 who some of you refer to as "Mean Mr. Benson." 394 00:16:37,489 --> 00:16:39,165 Shame on you. 395 00:16:39,708 --> 00:16:44,713 Because more than anything, Mr. Benson was misunderstood. 396 00:16:45,267 --> 00:16:46,590 Yeah, now, 397 00:16:46,615 --> 00:16:50,477 I know a lot of you know him as the mean old grouch 398 00:16:50,502 --> 00:16:54,563 who stole your toys or insulted your Halloween costumes 399 00:16:54,685 --> 00:16:57,350 or yelled at you about cutting your grass. 400 00:16:57,996 --> 00:17:00,730 Uh, yeah, because he did all those things. 401 00:17:01,313 --> 00:17:03,188 Yes, he did. 402 00:17:03,369 --> 00:17:04,906 But what you don't know 403 00:17:04,931 --> 00:17:07,434 is the reason why he did those things 404 00:17:07,459 --> 00:17:10,029 is because he cared about this neighborhood. 405 00:17:12,266 --> 00:17:17,741 Maybe he kept the toys that went into his yard 406 00:17:17,766 --> 00:17:22,285 to teach you the value of your belongings. 407 00:17:23,582 --> 00:17:27,160 And maybe he yelled at you 408 00:17:27,185 --> 00:17:32,051 about mowing your lawn so you could take pride in your homes. 409 00:17:33,154 --> 00:17:38,283 And just maybe he shut down a lemonade stand 410 00:17:38,308 --> 00:17:40,958 to teach a young entrepreneur that some people 411 00:17:40,983 --> 00:17:44,647 know the difference between taste of sugar and Sweet'N Low. 412 00:17:46,541 --> 00:17:48,575 Hey, yo, do you think Dad is talking about Mr. Benson 413 00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:51,646 - or himself? - I think both. 414 00:17:51,671 --> 00:17:53,411 He may have eaten one too many dumpster bagels. 415 00:17:53,436 --> 00:17:54,658 Yeah. 416 00:17:55,800 --> 00:17:57,410 So basically... 417 00:18:00,721 --> 00:18:03,473 what I'm saying is that before 418 00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:06,754 you call someone mean, 419 00:18:07,080 --> 00:18:12,007 ask yourself is the more appropriate word 420 00:18:12,438 --> 00:18:13,927 "hero"? 421 00:18:19,890 --> 00:18:23,677 He did it. He found the rhubarb pie. 422 00:18:32,035 --> 00:18:34,903 Dave, black people don't slow clap. 423 00:18:44,990 --> 00:18:47,401 Hey, what are you doing out here, little man? 424 00:18:47,433 --> 00:18:50,964 Not much. Just thinking about life and death. 425 00:18:53,341 --> 00:18:56,845 And how much cake I can eat before my parents catch me. 426 00:19:00,080 --> 00:19:01,581 You know, 427 00:19:01,606 --> 00:19:03,151 you're the only little kid around here 428 00:19:03,176 --> 00:19:04,718 that doesn't run away from me. 429 00:19:04,874 --> 00:19:06,401 Why would I run away? 430 00:19:06,636 --> 00:19:08,147 I don't know. 431 00:19:08,714 --> 00:19:11,484 Maybe because I'm Mean Mr. Butler. 432 00:19:11,738 --> 00:19:13,318 I don't think you're mean. 433 00:19:13,897 --> 00:19:16,740 You just always think you're right. 434 00:19:17,764 --> 00:19:20,994 Mm, for the record, that's because I am. 435 00:19:22,351 --> 00:19:24,163 Can I ask you a question? 436 00:19:24,188 --> 00:19:25,664 Yeah, shoot. 437 00:19:26,173 --> 00:19:28,168 Where do people go when they die? 438 00:19:28,193 --> 00:19:31,171 I've asked everyone, and they all say different stuff. 439 00:19:31,196 --> 00:19:33,151 Hmm. You know, 440 00:19:33,176 --> 00:19:35,841 I've been thinking about that a lot today, Grover. 441 00:19:36,037 --> 00:19:38,706 - You know what I've decided? - What? 442 00:19:39,159 --> 00:19:41,646 That maybe we shouldn't worry so much about 443 00:19:41,671 --> 00:19:43,464 where we go after we die, 444 00:19:43,519 --> 00:19:46,185 as long as we're good to each other when we're here. 445 00:19:48,239 --> 00:19:49,741 Want a piece of my cake? 446 00:19:49,766 --> 00:19:51,049 Thanks, buddy, 447 00:19:51,074 --> 00:19:53,525 but I'm kind of filled up on bagels. 448 00:19:59,443 --> 00:20:02,154 - Ooh! Ooh, the band's here! - Oh. 449 00:20:03,026 --> 00:20:04,558 You got a band? 450 00:20:04,583 --> 00:20:06,347 Yes. Mr. Benson was from New Orleans, 451 00:20:06,372 --> 00:20:09,041 so I thought we'd send him out in style. 452 00:20:18,330 --> 00:20:22,416 Well, Calvin Butler, that was a beautiful speech that you gave. 453 00:20:22,441 --> 00:20:23,940 Oh, thank you, baby. 454 00:20:24,197 --> 00:20:27,347 Well, I found that, uh, page from the magazine in your chair. 455 00:20:27,372 --> 00:20:28,227 Oh... 456 00:20:28,458 --> 00:20:30,838 So how about we keep this celebration going later 457 00:20:30,863 --> 00:20:32,565 with a number 12? 458 00:20:32,884 --> 00:20:34,580 What's a number 12? 459 00:20:35,838 --> 00:20:39,072 It's a number eight and a number four at the same time. 460 00:20:40,505 --> 00:20:42,200 Well, all right! 461 00:20:51,379 --> 00:20:57,432 - Synced and corrected by martythecrazy - - www.addic7ed.com - 33428

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