Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,078 --> 00:00:01,366
♪ Mr. Beetle Boo ♪
2
00:00:01,391 --> 00:00:03,592
♪ How do you do? How do you do? ♪
3
00:00:03,617 --> 00:00:05,918
♪ Mr. Beetle Boo, how do you do? ♪
4
00:00:05,985 --> 00:00:07,653
And he says...
5
00:00:09,722 --> 00:00:11,323
What the...
6
00:00:16,882 --> 00:00:18,515
Oh.
7
00:00:19,297 --> 00:00:20,932
Hi, Camille. Sorry.
8
00:00:20,998 --> 00:00:23,468
I was dropping off my
groceries before school,
9
00:00:23,535 --> 00:00:25,242
and my key isn't working.
10
00:00:25,364 --> 00:00:26,933
Do you still have a spare copy?
11
00:00:26,958 --> 00:00:30,461
No. They changed the locks on you.
12
00:00:30,617 --> 00:00:33,023
We don't want your kind here.
13
00:00:35,719 --> 00:00:36,992
Oh.
14
00:00:39,285 --> 00:00:40,818
What?
15
00:00:42,287 --> 00:00:43,570
By "your kind,"
16
00:00:43,609 --> 00:00:45,320
I meant "poor."
17
00:00:45,345 --> 00:00:47,062
Yeah, I got it, Camille!
18
00:00:47,087 --> 00:00:51,773
synced and corrected by susinz
*www.addic7ed.com*
19
00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:53,891
It's a new dating app I'm on
20
00:00:53,916 --> 00:00:55,285
called Silver Smooch.
21
00:00:55,310 --> 00:00:57,511
It's basically Tinder
but for old people.
22
00:00:57,578 --> 00:00:59,114
So it's a hookup app.
23
00:00:59,180 --> 00:01:00,481
Okay, first of all,
24
00:01:00,548 --> 00:01:02,016
whether or not Tinder is a hookup app
25
00:01:02,082 --> 00:01:03,882
is one of the great debates of our time.
26
00:01:04,054 --> 00:01:06,154
And secondly, I'm using Silver Smooch
27
00:01:06,221 --> 00:01:09,257
to find a fulfilling adult
relationship with a mature man.
28
00:01:09,289 --> 00:01:10,562
You do know you're too flat
29
00:01:10,587 --> 00:01:12,126
to be the next Anna Nicole Smith, right?
30
00:01:13,528 --> 00:01:15,529
I am not looking for a sugar daddy, Deb.
31
00:01:15,596 --> 00:01:16,997
I'm looking for someone
with perspective.
32
00:01:17,064 --> 00:01:19,466
Wow, Chelsea. You really are evolving.
33
00:01:19,534 --> 00:01:20,600
Thank you.
34
00:01:20,625 --> 00:01:21,773
And if his pubes are gray,
35
00:01:21,798 --> 00:01:23,601
I'll just close my eyes
when I'm down there.
36
00:01:26,674 --> 00:01:29,242
- Caroline, what's wrong?
- I've been evicted.
37
00:01:29,390 --> 00:01:31,478
I didn't even know that was possible.
38
00:01:31,546 --> 00:01:33,181
I thought it only happened to people
39
00:01:33,246 --> 00:01:34,915
on gritty TV dramas.
40
00:01:34,983 --> 00:01:37,651
- Why'd you get evicted?
- I can't pay my rent.
41
00:01:37,719 --> 00:01:39,120
I told my landlord he'd get it
42
00:01:39,186 --> 00:01:41,273
as soon as my accounts were unfrozen.
43
00:01:41,298 --> 00:01:43,391
A Watson always pays her debts.
44
00:01:43,457 --> 00:01:45,058
- Like a Lannister.
- Oh, no.
45
00:01:45,126 --> 00:01:47,162
Mr. Lannister was kicked out
of the yacht club
46
00:01:47,227 --> 00:01:49,896
after he brought an escort
to the Commodore's Ball.
47
00:01:50,406 --> 00:01:52,700
Okay, we're gonna need
to circle back to that.
48
00:01:52,766 --> 00:01:54,748
How much is your rent
that you can't pay it?
49
00:01:54,773 --> 00:01:57,471
Normally, I wouldn't answer
such a gauche question,
50
00:01:57,539 --> 00:01:58,840
but now that I'm eviction poor,
51
00:01:58,906 --> 00:02:00,429
nothing matters anyway.
52
00:02:01,108 --> 00:02:02,242
$4,000.
53
00:02:02,309 --> 00:02:03,911
- Oh, boy!
- What?
54
00:02:03,978 --> 00:02:07,548
My AC/DC-themed Alaskan
cruise didn't cost that much.
55
00:02:07,615 --> 00:02:08,815
Sounds like you're
going to need something
56
00:02:08,882 --> 00:02:10,150
that's more in your budget.
57
00:02:10,218 --> 00:02:13,155
- I can help you.
- Budget...
58
00:02:13,220 --> 00:02:16,429
We used to make fun of people
with those when we were little.
59
00:02:19,977 --> 00:02:21,445
I mean thank you.
60
00:02:21,845 --> 00:02:22,880
Ugly.
61
00:02:22,947 --> 00:02:23,960
Fugly.
62
00:02:24,039 --> 00:02:25,961
Fugnacious. Fug life.
63
00:02:25,986 --> 00:02:28,304
- Fugsly Addams.
- Hi, guys.
64
00:02:29,453 --> 00:02:30,789
Hey, Botox.
65
00:02:30,855 --> 00:02:32,690
I didn't get your attendance
sheets this morning.
66
00:02:32,756 --> 00:02:34,593
Do I have to ask for them every day?
67
00:02:34,659 --> 00:02:36,076
Stop exaggerating.
68
00:02:36,101 --> 00:02:38,130
We don't come in on the weekends.
69
00:02:38,507 --> 00:02:39,710
They're right there.
70
00:02:41,226 --> 00:02:42,437
I'm waiting.
71
00:02:43,744 --> 00:02:44,979
So am I.
72
00:02:47,439 --> 00:02:49,007
Ugh.
73
00:02:52,953 --> 00:02:54,645
Looking up "symptoms of chlamydia"?
74
00:02:54,712 --> 00:02:56,881
If you must know, I'm on Silver Smooch.
75
00:02:56,947 --> 00:02:59,250
Oh. That'll work out well for you.
76
00:02:59,316 --> 00:03:01,017
If they're hard of hearing,
maybe they won't
77
00:03:01,084 --> 00:03:02,920
be able to tell you're an idiot.
78
00:03:02,987 --> 00:03:05,356
Maybe they will be able
to tell you're an idiot.
79
00:03:05,422 --> 00:03:06,690
Sweet burn. If you're lucky,
80
00:03:06,758 --> 00:03:08,693
maybe you'll find someone who's blind.
81
00:03:08,760 --> 00:03:10,595
Of course, it'll be over once they do
82
00:03:10,661 --> 00:03:12,096
that "feel your face" thing.
83
00:03:12,164 --> 00:03:15,232
At least I have both
of my original knees, bitch.
84
00:03:17,539 --> 00:03:20,008
Sorry. Language.
85
00:03:21,281 --> 00:03:22,640
You can go now.
86
00:03:22,859 --> 00:03:25,142
Or do you need someone to wheel
you back to your coffin?
87
00:03:28,601 --> 00:03:31,015
Gross. Sick. Ugly. Pervert.
88
00:03:35,062 --> 00:03:37,587
Now, what you're smelling is cat piss
89
00:03:37,654 --> 00:03:40,257
with a hint of dead possum.
90
00:03:40,421 --> 00:03:42,125
Don't worry. They're long gone.
91
00:03:42,193 --> 00:03:43,727
Raccoon killed 'em both.
92
00:03:43,794 --> 00:03:46,096
Chewed right through the wall
and dragged the carcasses out.
93
00:03:46,164 --> 00:03:48,633
Did our job for us. Hakuna matata.
94
00:03:48,700 --> 00:03:50,402
How quaint.
95
00:03:50,468 --> 00:03:53,070
Now you never have to worry
about a glare in this apartment
96
00:03:53,136 --> 00:03:55,005
because the sun is almost
completely obstructed
97
00:03:55,072 --> 00:03:56,675
by that prison across the street.
98
00:03:58,475 --> 00:04:00,812
- Uh, listen, Darnell...
- Mm-hmm.
99
00:04:00,879 --> 00:04:03,648
I'm not quite sure
this place is to my taste.
100
00:04:03,714 --> 00:04:05,468
It's, um...
101
00:04:07,164 --> 00:04:08,386
You know what? I can't be polite,
102
00:04:08,452 --> 00:04:09,819
so I'm going to stop talking.
103
00:04:09,886 --> 00:04:11,856
Personally, I see a lot of upside.
104
00:04:11,923 --> 00:04:13,825
The six bolt locks on the door mean
105
00:04:13,892 --> 00:04:15,601
you don't need an alarm system.
106
00:04:16,656 --> 00:04:18,662
Before you ask, uh,
107
00:04:18,729 --> 00:04:19,863
the owner of the building insisted
108
00:04:19,931 --> 00:04:21,365
those are not bullet holes.
109
00:04:21,431 --> 00:04:22,833
Those are from termites.
110
00:04:23,171 --> 00:04:25,068
Maybe you can get 'em
to split the rent with you.
111
00:04:25,135 --> 00:04:27,632
Oh, no, one of my pearls fell out.
112
00:04:30,593 --> 00:04:31,820
It's a human tooth.
113
00:04:32,445 --> 00:04:34,111
- We're leaving.
- If y'all change your mind,
114
00:04:34,178 --> 00:04:35,880
got to let me know quick, all right?
115
00:04:35,947 --> 00:04:38,416
It's the only unit that
no one's been murdered in!
116
00:04:42,852 --> 00:04:44,420
Miss Bennigan?
117
00:04:44,665 --> 00:04:46,999
Oh, hi, Benji.
118
00:04:47,179 --> 00:04:49,125
What are you doing here?
119
00:04:49,273 --> 00:04:51,059
I'm grocery shopping.
120
00:04:51,126 --> 00:04:53,362
But you're a teacher.
121
00:04:53,429 --> 00:04:55,398
Yeah. So?
122
00:05:00,369 --> 00:05:01,703
Okay.
123
00:05:01,769 --> 00:05:05,940
Well, I guess I'll see you at school.
124
00:05:20,773 --> 00:05:22,324
Oh, no.
125
00:05:28,545 --> 00:05:30,030
Caroline?
126
00:05:30,598 --> 00:05:32,054
What are you doing?
127
00:05:32,667 --> 00:05:34,703
I just thought it would be fun
128
00:05:34,769 --> 00:05:36,539
to work in my nightgown today.
129
00:05:38,613 --> 00:05:39,678
Fine.
130
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:41,643
I slept here last night.
131
00:05:41,710 --> 00:05:43,912
What? Why would you do that?
132
00:05:43,978 --> 00:05:47,282
- Because I got evicted.
- And you didn't tell me?
133
00:05:48,749 --> 00:05:50,451
I'm sorry.
134
00:05:50,518 --> 00:05:53,515
- I was embarrassed.
- Oh, Caroline.
135
00:05:54,664 --> 00:05:57,026
I was hoping to find a place
before you found out,
136
00:05:57,093 --> 00:05:59,360
but unfortunately, all the apartments
137
00:05:59,427 --> 00:06:02,062
on the Craigs place
are former murder dens.
138
00:06:02,351 --> 00:06:05,166
But don't worry. I'll find something.
139
00:06:05,234 --> 00:06:07,069
Care Bear, this is silly.
140
00:06:07,136 --> 00:06:08,938
Just move in with me.
141
00:06:09,004 --> 00:06:11,921
But we've only been dating
for six months.
142
00:06:12,441 --> 00:06:13,642
I think we're ready.
143
00:06:13,708 --> 00:06:15,211
I haven't even stayed over.
144
00:06:15,276 --> 00:06:17,078
We always sleep at my place
because of the...
145
00:06:17,146 --> 00:06:19,482
King-sized bed and cappuccino maker.
146
00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:25,720
Caroline Beatrice Lavinia
Watson, move in with me.
147
00:06:25,787 --> 00:06:27,389
I won't take "no" for an answer.
148
00:06:27,456 --> 00:06:29,391
Okay. Okay! Oh.
149
00:06:29,456 --> 00:06:31,835
- Okay!
- Let's move in together!
150
00:06:32,360 --> 00:06:34,730
Oh, you've made me a very happy man.
151
00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:36,098
I have?
152
00:06:36,165 --> 00:06:39,234
Celebrate with a quick trip
to the Pacifica?
153
00:06:39,567 --> 00:06:40,800
Oh.
154
00:06:42,804 --> 00:06:45,040
Chelsea, you're not
swiping right on anybody.
155
00:06:45,107 --> 00:06:47,042
I have high standards
when it comes to men.
156
00:06:47,109 --> 00:06:49,476
The last guy you hooked up
with had his nose shot off.
157
00:06:49,532 --> 00:06:51,333
He was in a Hummer stretch limo.
158
00:06:51,392 --> 00:06:52,661
Context.
159
00:06:53,328 --> 00:06:55,383
Look at these guys. These suck.
160
00:06:55,449 --> 00:06:56,717
Here we go, "Orland,
161
00:06:56,785 --> 00:06:58,886
"93, German expat.
162
00:06:58,953 --> 00:07:00,655
"Has had to make some hard choices.
163
00:07:00,722 --> 00:07:02,491
Don't ask too many questions."
164
00:07:02,557 --> 00:07:03,624
Yikes.
165
00:07:03,691 --> 00:07:05,393
"Abdul, 68.
166
00:07:05,461 --> 00:07:08,023
Proud grandfather and veteran.
No limbs."
167
00:07:08,065 --> 00:07:10,236
Too high maintenance. Oh, my God.
168
00:07:10,598 --> 00:07:12,335
This guy is a piece.
169
00:07:12,515 --> 00:07:14,369
"Miles, 55.
170
00:07:14,436 --> 00:07:16,805
Retired CEO of Fortune 500 company."
171
00:07:16,872 --> 00:07:18,340
"No kids.
172
00:07:18,406 --> 00:07:20,841
I enjoy sushi and sailing
my boat to Key West."
173
00:07:21,109 --> 00:07:22,576
Oh, my God, I love sushi,
174
00:07:22,643 --> 00:07:25,179
and Key West could be the name
of Kimye's next baby.
175
00:07:25,247 --> 00:07:27,148
This guy's perfect.
176
00:07:27,757 --> 00:07:29,485
It's a match!
177
00:07:31,886 --> 00:07:33,781
You just got catfished, bitch.
178
00:07:45,336 --> 00:07:47,960
Toby, do you mind
if I move these laser discs
179
00:07:47,985 --> 00:07:50,070
so I can put a doily on this side table?
180
00:07:50,141 --> 00:07:51,546
Not at all.
181
00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:54,265
Those are ones I pulled out to watch,
182
00:07:54,333 --> 00:07:55,901
but I can just write down the titles
183
00:07:55,968 --> 00:07:57,953
and pull 'em out again later.
184
00:07:58,281 --> 00:08:00,939
Do you mind if I put these dishes
185
00:08:01,006 --> 00:08:02,641
in the bottom of the closet?
186
00:08:02,708 --> 00:08:05,210
We don't really need 'em since
I've already got my dishes.
187
00:08:05,276 --> 00:08:07,913
Sure. Oh, but do you mind
188
00:08:07,978 --> 00:08:10,481
if we keep just one of my bowls
in the cabinet?
189
00:08:10,549 --> 00:08:12,517
It holds just the perfect
amount of cereal
190
00:08:12,583 --> 00:08:15,019
- for breakfast in the morning.
- Sure thing.
191
00:08:15,086 --> 00:08:17,222
If it's a different size
from the rest of my bowls,
192
00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:19,828
I'll just put it on the bottom
or top of the stack.
193
00:08:23,595 --> 00:08:26,464
It's bigger than the rest of my bowls.
194
00:08:26,531 --> 00:08:29,968
So we'll just have to lift up
the stack of bowls
195
00:08:30,035 --> 00:08:31,390
and put it on the bottom.
196
00:08:31,415 --> 00:08:32,750
Great.
197
00:08:33,472 --> 00:08:35,607
Do you mind if I unplug your lamp
198
00:08:35,632 --> 00:08:36,960
so I can charge my phone?
199
00:08:36,990 --> 00:08:38,257
Not at all.
200
00:08:38,585 --> 00:08:41,146
It's my reading light,
but if I want to read,
201
00:08:41,213 --> 00:08:43,747
I'll just unplug your charger,
plug in the lamp,
202
00:08:43,814 --> 00:08:45,083
and then when I'm done,
203
00:08:45,150 --> 00:08:46,351
I'll unplug the lamp
204
00:08:46,418 --> 00:08:47,853
and plug your charger back in.
205
00:08:47,920 --> 00:08:50,125
- Easy peasy.
- Easy peasy.
206
00:08:57,127 --> 00:08:58,687
- Miss Bennigan?
- Hi, Benji.
207
00:08:58,803 --> 00:09:00,771
- What are you doing?
- I'm jogging.
208
00:09:01,065 --> 00:09:03,067
- On the street?
- Yeah.
209
00:09:03,135 --> 00:09:04,403
I live right down the street.
210
00:09:04,469 --> 00:09:06,403
- You live down the street?
- Okay.
211
00:09:06,471 --> 00:09:08,359
I thought you lived at school!
212
00:09:08,593 --> 00:09:11,109
Why don't you live at school?
213
00:09:32,528 --> 00:09:33,997
Liar.
214
00:09:44,809 --> 00:09:46,310
Thank you.
215
00:10:02,426 --> 00:10:03,724
No.
216
00:10:11,779 --> 00:10:13,047
Class it up.
217
00:10:13,072 --> 00:10:15,875
This bitch is heinous to her anus.
218
00:10:16,141 --> 00:10:18,075
- Oh.
- So how's home sweet home
219
00:10:18,142 --> 00:10:20,445
- with Toby?
- Oh, it's lovely.
220
00:10:20,511 --> 00:10:23,013
His studio's turned
into our little love nest.
221
00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:24,849
- Aw, that's great.
- Yeah.
222
00:10:24,915 --> 00:10:26,513
It's been easy peasy.
223
00:10:28,218 --> 00:10:29,588
Question.
224
00:10:29,655 --> 00:10:32,156
Do you ever... eat in bed?
225
00:10:32,223 --> 00:10:34,138
- Like breakfast in bed?
- No.
226
00:10:34,163 --> 00:10:36,698
More like... before you go to sleep.
227
00:10:36,864 --> 00:10:38,130
Do you ever just...
228
00:10:38,470 --> 00:10:39,677
chew taffy?
229
00:10:40,639 --> 00:10:41,896
Like cud?
230
00:10:42,500 --> 00:10:44,622
- No.
- Toby does.
231
00:10:44,931 --> 00:10:46,528
He sure does.
232
00:10:47,111 --> 00:10:48,448
You know what else is interesting?
233
00:10:48,640 --> 00:10:51,021
He has inspirational quotes everywhere.
234
00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:52,415
Everywhere.
235
00:10:52,676 --> 00:10:54,312
Like the kind you buy near the checkout
236
00:10:54,378 --> 00:10:55,546
at Bed Bath & Beyond.
237
00:10:55,613 --> 00:10:57,615
What's wrong with inspiring quotes?
238
00:11:00,132 --> 00:11:01,247
Nothing.
239
00:11:02,152 --> 00:11:03,599
It's just interesting.
240
00:11:04,356 --> 00:11:06,191
You know what else is interesting?
241
00:11:06,257 --> 00:11:07,624
He highlights every other word
242
00:11:07,692 --> 00:11:09,561
of Vicki Lawrence's autobiography.
243
00:11:09,627 --> 00:11:11,796
I mean, what could
Vicki Lawrence have to say
244
00:11:11,862 --> 00:11:13,330
that's so important?
245
00:11:13,747 --> 00:11:15,666
- Everything okay?
- I don't know.
246
00:11:15,733 --> 00:11:17,880
Maybe we moved in together too soon.
247
00:11:18,837 --> 00:11:21,673
I'm realizing there's so much
we don't know about each other.
248
00:11:21,739 --> 00:11:23,274
The first time
I moved in with a partner,
249
00:11:23,342 --> 00:11:25,144
we fought every day for the first month.
250
00:11:25,209 --> 00:11:27,177
But with all the intense arguing
251
00:11:27,245 --> 00:11:29,341
came the most rewarding
lovemaking of my life.
252
00:11:29,404 --> 00:11:30,573
You're right.
253
00:11:30,835 --> 00:11:33,503
- I'm sure it'll work out.
- Yeah.
254
00:11:33,752 --> 00:11:35,820
Although, in the end,
she did steal my laptop
255
00:11:35,887 --> 00:11:36,988
and give me HPV.
256
00:11:44,134 --> 00:11:45,802
Are you kidding me?
257
00:11:45,827 --> 00:11:47,528
Are you kidding me?
258
00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:57,040
Showtime.
259
00:12:06,636 --> 00:12:08,575
She's wearing real clothes.
260
00:12:10,075 --> 00:12:12,256
No tube top. What the hell?
261
00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:24,794
She wrote out what she's gonna say.
262
00:12:25,223 --> 00:12:26,559
Oh...
263
00:12:26,798 --> 00:12:28,028
crap.
264
00:12:40,251 --> 00:12:41,599
- Care Bear.
- Hmm?
265
00:12:41,682 --> 00:12:44,018
Could you not hum, please?
266
00:12:44,187 --> 00:12:46,288
- Oh, was I humming?
- Yes.
267
00:12:46,457 --> 00:12:47,739
It's a little distracting.
268
00:12:47,764 --> 00:12:49,265
I didn't even realize.
269
00:12:49,493 --> 00:12:51,896
Guess it's just what happens
when the music's in you.
270
00:13:03,007 --> 00:13:06,343
Toby, honey, could you not
mouth the words when you read?
271
00:13:06,410 --> 00:13:07,779
Your lips are smacking.
272
00:13:07,846 --> 00:13:09,919
- I'm sorry, sweetheart.
- That's okay.
273
00:13:11,750 --> 00:13:13,684
Could you not light that?
274
00:13:13,751 --> 00:13:16,621
Every time I smell toast,
I think I'm having a stroke.
275
00:13:16,688 --> 00:13:18,289
The scent isn't "toast," Toby.
276
00:13:18,314 --> 00:13:19,794
It's "Santa's Christmas Cookie."
277
00:13:19,819 --> 00:13:21,455
How about we just go to sleep?
278
00:13:32,404 --> 00:13:33,653
What's this?
279
00:13:34,718 --> 00:13:35,903
Whoops!
280
00:13:36,308 --> 00:13:38,809
That's... some folded toilet paper
281
00:13:38,877 --> 00:13:42,112
I keep in my underwear
to catch any residual leakage
282
00:13:42,179 --> 00:13:43,213
after I urinate.
283
00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:45,683
Ugh! Disgusting!
284
00:13:45,750 --> 00:13:47,114
Wha... sorry!
285
00:13:52,879 --> 00:13:55,731
Caroline, we can't go to bed angry.
286
00:13:57,695 --> 00:13:59,863
Wh-what is that?
287
00:13:59,930 --> 00:14:01,560
Moustache cream.
288
00:14:02,099 --> 00:14:04,002
Oh, what? So I'm revolting
289
00:14:04,069 --> 00:14:05,803
for bleaching my upper lip
but you can have
290
00:14:05,870 --> 00:14:08,440
a pee-spotted man-pon in the bed?
291
00:14:08,506 --> 00:14:10,742
I'm sorry! I prefer not to go to bed
292
00:14:10,809 --> 00:14:12,536
with Wilford Brimley!
293
00:14:12,709 --> 00:14:14,185
How dare you?
294
00:14:14,662 --> 00:14:15,963
You know what?
295
00:14:16,280 --> 00:14:18,440
Maybe I should never have moved in
in the first place.
296
00:14:18,465 --> 00:14:20,771
- Maybe!
- Fine!
297
00:14:22,117 --> 00:14:23,685
I have to wash this off.
298
00:14:23,854 --> 00:14:26,257
Not because of you.
Because it burns like hell!
299
00:14:30,561 --> 00:14:32,028
Mmm-mmm-mmm.
300
00:14:33,185 --> 00:14:35,224
Yeah, you can put
that right there, thank you.
301
00:14:35,632 --> 00:14:36,794
Mmm.
302
00:14:37,919 --> 00:14:40,355
- Chelsea.
- Mavis?
303
00:14:41,810 --> 00:14:43,040
What are you doing here?
304
00:14:43,065 --> 00:14:44,325
I have to tell you something.
305
00:14:44,372 --> 00:14:46,643
Make it quick. I'm on a hot, hot date
306
00:14:46,710 --> 00:14:48,458
- with a hot, hot guy.
- No, you're not.
307
00:14:48,483 --> 00:14:50,151
Yes, I am. He's just...
308
00:14:50,176 --> 00:14:52,497
in the bathroom taking a hot, hot dump.
309
00:14:52,544 --> 00:14:53,927
- No, he isn't.
- Yes, he is.
310
00:14:53,952 --> 00:14:55,114
- No, he isn't.
- Yes, he is!
311
00:14:55,139 --> 00:14:56,591
No, he isn't! I'm Miles.
312
00:14:58,409 --> 00:14:59,746
What?
313
00:15:00,339 --> 00:15:03,007
I'm Miles. I catfished you.
314
00:15:06,442 --> 00:15:07,731
So you were...
315
00:15:08,232 --> 00:15:09,467
The whole time?
316
00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:11,630
Yes. I'm sorry.
317
00:15:11,919 --> 00:15:13,471
I realized watching you that...
318
00:15:13,537 --> 00:15:14,905
You were watching me?
319
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:17,574
You are sick! You know that?
320
00:15:17,641 --> 00:15:19,944
I didn't think you would
take it this seriously.
321
00:15:20,011 --> 00:15:23,048
You took my dignity,
but you don't get my desserts!
322
00:15:26,418 --> 00:15:28,263
I'm taking a Lyft.
323
00:15:41,766 --> 00:15:43,474
Good night, Toblerone.
324
00:15:51,442 --> 00:15:53,712
It really does burn like hell.
325
00:16:01,521 --> 00:16:03,123
Benji, time to put your book away
326
00:16:03,190 --> 00:16:04,491
and work on your math.
327
00:16:04,557 --> 00:16:05,942
Why should I listen to you?
328
00:16:06,021 --> 00:16:07,326
You're not a teacher.
329
00:16:07,393 --> 00:16:08,942
You're just a regular person.
330
00:16:08,967 --> 00:16:11,502
You're all just regular people!
331
00:16:11,527 --> 00:16:13,930
Yeah. That's right.
332
00:16:14,234 --> 00:16:17,192
Teachers are just regular people.
333
00:16:17,575 --> 00:16:20,640
We have feelings and opinions
334
00:16:20,707 --> 00:16:23,142
and crappy cars.
335
00:16:23,210 --> 00:16:25,546
And I wake up every morning at 6:00 a.m.
336
00:16:25,611 --> 00:16:28,781
and drive in traffic on the Dan Ryan...
337
00:16:28,848 --> 00:16:31,618
the Dan Ryan...
338
00:16:31,685 --> 00:16:33,619
to come here and teach all of you,
339
00:16:33,686 --> 00:16:36,922
and I make less than a party clown!
340
00:16:36,989 --> 00:16:39,158
So, yeah, Benji,
341
00:16:39,225 --> 00:16:42,495
I'm just a regular person.
342
00:16:42,561 --> 00:16:45,798
Now take out your dang worksheet!
343
00:16:49,414 --> 00:16:50,700
Thanks, Mavis.
344
00:16:52,067 --> 00:16:55,441
So... how was your date with Miles?
345
00:16:55,508 --> 00:16:57,342
He was a total loser.
346
00:16:57,409 --> 00:16:59,144
He was one of those weird older guys
347
00:16:59,212 --> 00:17:00,446
with a jacked up upper body
348
00:17:00,513 --> 00:17:02,116
and tiny little legs.
349
00:17:02,182 --> 00:17:04,218
So... yeah.
350
00:17:04,283 --> 00:17:05,619
I'm sorry, Chelsea.
351
00:17:05,685 --> 00:17:07,287
I know you were really
excited about him.
352
00:17:07,353 --> 00:17:08,854
Yeah, I was, until I realized
353
00:17:08,921 --> 00:17:10,690
old people are lame, really lame.
354
00:17:10,756 --> 00:17:13,025
Well, we'll get you
some cookie dough for lunch.
355
00:17:13,092 --> 00:17:14,494
Yeah.
356
00:17:17,330 --> 00:17:18,544
Chelsea...
357
00:17:19,331 --> 00:17:22,569
I am so sorry for what I did last night.
358
00:17:22,594 --> 00:17:24,239
Here are my attendance sheets.
359
00:17:25,724 --> 00:17:27,042
- Look.
- Mm.
360
00:17:27,067 --> 00:17:29,943
You hurt my feelings
a lot over the years,
361
00:17:30,435 --> 00:17:33,347
and I thought making you
feel small and unimportant
362
00:17:33,413 --> 00:17:35,903
might make me feel better,
but it didn't.
363
00:17:36,036 --> 00:17:37,483
You're a really bad person.
364
00:17:37,550 --> 00:17:39,005
You're no angel either.
365
00:17:39,153 --> 00:17:42,455
I know I've been sometimes
a little bit kind of
366
00:17:42,522 --> 00:17:43,991
barely at all rude to you,
367
00:17:44,057 --> 00:17:46,493
but I have basically
been polite and respectful.
368
00:17:46,559 --> 00:17:47,994
What's my last name?
369
00:17:48,061 --> 00:17:49,458
Mavis...
370
00:17:51,298 --> 00:17:54,692
Maaa-visss.
371
00:17:55,083 --> 00:17:57,185
My name is not Mavis Mavis.
372
00:17:57,653 --> 00:17:59,130
Fine.
373
00:18:00,268 --> 00:18:01,636
I am sorry.
374
00:18:01,741 --> 00:18:03,210
I know I can be a ratchet beast,
375
00:18:03,276 --> 00:18:05,481
but I'm trying really hard to be better.
376
00:18:06,545 --> 00:18:08,147
I should've been nicer to you.
377
00:18:08,214 --> 00:18:09,816
Apology accepted.
378
00:18:09,882 --> 00:18:11,784
And I believe there's a good person
379
00:18:11,851 --> 00:18:14,620
somewhere deep inside
that ratchet beast.
380
00:18:14,686 --> 00:18:16,657
You're gonna make me cry again.
381
00:18:21,160 --> 00:18:23,362
- That felt weird.
- Yes, it did.
382
00:18:23,429 --> 00:18:24,755
Let's not do that again.
383
00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:28,536
- Toby.
- Caroline.
384
00:18:29,856 --> 00:18:32,339
- I'm sorry.
- No, I'm sorry.
385
00:18:32,405 --> 00:18:35,175
I'm really glad you moved in with me.
386
00:18:35,241 --> 00:18:36,505
Me too.
387
00:18:36,552 --> 00:18:38,477
We're just experiencing
some growing pains.
388
00:18:38,544 --> 00:18:41,514
Maybe we need
to establish some house rules.
389
00:18:41,580 --> 00:18:43,146
That's a great idea.
390
00:18:43,911 --> 00:18:45,618
You know who could help us with that?
391
00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:48,120
Caroline, Toby asks that you refrain
392
00:18:48,187 --> 00:18:51,083
from doing your vocal warm-ups
until at least 7:00 a.m.
393
00:18:51,401 --> 00:18:54,071
Fine, I'll save it
for the ride to school.
394
00:18:54,096 --> 00:18:56,528
And, Toby, uh, Caroline has proposed
395
00:18:56,596 --> 00:18:58,498
that you stop calling Target "Targets."
396
00:18:58,564 --> 00:18:59,698
I don't do that.
397
00:18:59,723 --> 00:19:00,935
Where do we get our paper towels?
398
00:19:00,960 --> 00:19:02,161
Targets.
399
00:19:02,445 --> 00:19:03,786
Okay, I'll stop.
400
00:19:04,478 --> 00:19:07,348
Caroline, Toby asks that you
not refold his T-shirts.
401
00:19:07,411 --> 00:19:08,742
So you want your T-shirt stack to look
402
00:19:08,808 --> 00:19:10,450
like something out of a Dr. Seuss book?
403
00:19:10,475 --> 00:19:11,878
Caroline.
404
00:19:12,379 --> 00:19:13,981
- Okay.
- Great.
405
00:19:14,481 --> 00:19:16,583
And, Toby, Caroline proposes
406
00:19:16,649 --> 00:19:19,106
you take down the signs
of inspirational quotes.
407
00:19:19,178 --> 00:19:21,208
- I'd rather not.
- Fine.
408
00:19:22,106 --> 00:19:24,185
- But that's a big one.
- Moving on.
409
00:19:25,425 --> 00:19:27,092
What's a "man-pon"?
410
00:19:27,159 --> 00:19:28,629
Toby?
411
00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:35,810
"No one had seen Harvey in the dress.
412
00:19:36,060 --> 00:19:39,112
"When he walked out
with breasts like torpedoes,
413
00:19:39,180 --> 00:19:40,849
Tim immediately broke"...
414
00:19:43,919 --> 00:19:46,220
Ahh.
415
00:19:46,287 --> 00:19:49,257
"My eyes widened.
My lips began to quiver.
416
00:19:49,323 --> 00:19:50,691
"But I didn't break.
417
00:19:50,913 --> 00:19:53,558
I knew I deserved my place in the show."
418
00:19:53,583 --> 00:19:54,870
- Hmm.
- Yeah.
419
00:19:54,895 --> 00:19:56,663
- Yeah, good for Vicki.
- I like that about her.
420
00:19:56,730 --> 00:19:58,968
- Yeah.
- Know it. Own it.
421
00:19:58,993 --> 00:20:00,731
Yeah, own it.
422
00:20:00,755 --> 00:20:05,489
synced and corrected by susinz
*www.addic7ed.com*
29098
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
