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♪ Green Acres is the place to be
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♪ Farm livin' is the life for me
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♪ Land spreadin'
out so far and white
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00:00:29,997 --> 00:00:34,044
♪ Keep Manhattan, just
gimme that countryside
5
00:00:34,068 --> 00:00:38,015
♪ New York is
where I'd rather stay
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♪ I get allergic smelling hay
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♪ I just adore a penthouse view
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00:00:46,047 --> 00:00:50,215
♪ Darling, I love you,
but give me Park Avenue
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00:00:51,419 --> 00:00:57,401
♪ The chores ♪
The stores ♪ Fresh air
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♪ Times square ♪ You are my wife
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♪ Goodbye city life
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♪ Green Acres we are there
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What do you say, Sam?
14
00:01:20,814 --> 00:01:22,325
- You want me to
give you how much?
15
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- Just $500.
16
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- Close the door quietly
on your way out, Haney.
17
00:01:28,389 --> 00:01:31,468
- But Sam, we'll
all be millionaires.
18
00:01:31,492 --> 00:01:34,538
- Look, Fred, if you think
this is such a great invention,
19
00:01:34,562 --> 00:01:36,873
why don't you go to the
bank and borrow the money?
20
00:01:36,897 --> 00:01:39,142
- Because they'd want
to know what it's for,
21
00:01:39,166 --> 00:01:40,944
and then the
secret would be out.
22
00:01:40,968 --> 00:01:43,413
- Yeah, we want to keep
it a closed corporation
23
00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:44,914
between us three.
24
00:01:44,938 --> 00:01:47,551
- And we're cuttin'
you in for a third.
25
00:01:47,575 --> 00:01:49,186
- How much you
puttin' up, Haney?
26
00:01:49,210 --> 00:01:50,387
- Nothin'.
27
00:01:50,411 --> 00:01:51,754
That's the first
rule of big business,
28
00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:54,991
always use somebody
else's money.
29
00:01:55,015 --> 00:01:56,493
- Well, I ain't interested.
30
00:01:56,517 --> 00:01:59,096
And even if I was,
I haven't got $500.
31
00:01:59,120 --> 00:02:00,663
- You can mortgage the store.
32
00:02:00,687 --> 00:02:02,199
- There is a mortgage on it.
33
00:02:02,223 --> 00:02:03,633
- Well, put a second on it.
34
00:02:03,657 --> 00:02:05,235
- I've got a second on it.
35
00:02:05,259 --> 00:02:06,769
- How 'bout a third?
36
00:02:06,793 --> 00:02:10,474
- Look, I'm already up to
six and pushin' for seven.
37
00:02:10,498 --> 00:02:12,142
- But Sam, this is
the greatest thing
38
00:02:12,166 --> 00:02:13,776
that Luke ever invented.
39
00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:16,446
- Well, how could a
machine possibly make milk?
40
00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:17,814
- Well, you'll see
41
00:02:17,838 --> 00:02:19,749
soon as Newt
comes with the proof.
42
00:02:19,773 --> 00:02:21,151
- Look, I already
got burned once
43
00:02:21,175 --> 00:02:23,253
on one of Loony
Luke's inventions.
44
00:02:23,277 --> 00:02:27,357
I lost $50 on that electric
spat buttoner of his.
45
00:02:27,381 --> 00:02:28,825
But Sam...
46
00:02:28,849 --> 00:02:30,260
- I got it.
47
00:02:30,284 --> 00:02:33,263
Luke made it for me
fresh while I was there.
48
00:02:33,287 --> 00:02:35,665
- Now what more proof
you want than that, Sam?
49
00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:37,200
- That's no proof.
50
00:02:37,224 --> 00:02:38,224
- Taste it.
51
00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:43,273
- What's it taste like?
52
00:02:43,297 --> 00:02:44,207
- Milk.
53
00:02:44,231 --> 00:02:46,398
- Let's have the $500, Sam.
54
00:02:47,801 --> 00:02:49,712
- You fellas go out and milk
a cow and expect me to...
55
00:02:49,736 --> 00:02:53,405
- This come from Luke's
milk-makin' machine.
56
00:02:54,508 --> 00:02:55,918
- I saw it work.
57
00:02:55,942 --> 00:02:58,488
Luke put some hay in
the top of this contraption,
58
00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:00,857
and then he turned
a couple knobs,
59
00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:04,628
then the machine started
gurglin' and thumpin.'
60
00:03:04,652 --> 00:03:05,928
Then the bell rang,
61
00:03:05,952 --> 00:03:09,098
and out came some
milk at the other end.
62
00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:12,035
- Out.
- How 'bout the $500, Sam?
63
00:03:12,059 --> 00:03:13,059
- Out!
64
00:03:14,161 --> 00:03:16,406
- Well, ain't but
one thing left to do.
65
00:03:16,430 --> 00:03:18,908
We'll just have to go
over and sweet talk it
66
00:03:18,932 --> 00:03:20,777
out of Mr. Douglas.
67
00:03:25,005 --> 00:03:25,948
- Oh, hi.
68
00:03:25,972 --> 00:03:27,484
- Oh, Oliver?
69
00:03:27,508 --> 00:03:30,153
Would you give me a couple
of eggs from the icebox, please?
70
00:03:30,177 --> 00:03:31,087
- Yeah.
71
00:03:31,111 --> 00:03:32,889
- Oh, and I need some milk, too.
72
00:03:32,913 --> 00:03:34,324
- Uh-huh.
73
00:03:34,348 --> 00:03:35,458
What are you doing?
74
00:03:35,482 --> 00:03:38,228
- I'm making a
chocolate cake for desert.
75
00:03:38,252 --> 00:03:40,230
- Lisa, you don't know how
to make a chocolate cake.
76
00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:42,365
- Well, it's very
easy with this.
77
00:03:42,389 --> 00:03:43,389
See?
78
00:03:44,558 --> 00:03:47,070
- Bibber's Instant Cake Mix.
79
00:03:47,094 --> 00:03:48,238
- You heard their slogan.
80
00:03:48,262 --> 00:03:50,740
You can't make a
booboo with Bibber's.
81
00:03:50,764 --> 00:03:51,741
- No, I don't believe I...
82
00:03:51,765 --> 00:03:53,210
- That has everything in it.
83
00:03:53,234 --> 00:03:55,878
All you have to do is add
milk and eggs to the contents.
84
00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:57,581
- Well, that sounds
like you, uh...
85
00:03:59,906 --> 00:04:05,422
Uh... - Now the eggs.
- Uh, Lisa... - One,
86
00:04:05,446 --> 00:04:06,446
two.
87
00:04:07,448 --> 00:04:09,559
It couldn't be simpler
than this, could it?
88
00:04:09,583 --> 00:04:11,194
- Uh, no, but...
89
00:04:11,218 --> 00:04:13,697
- After adding the
eggs and the milk,
90
00:04:13,721 --> 00:04:15,732
mix the contents thoroughly.
91
00:04:18,659 --> 00:04:20,825
Well, that ought to do it.
92
00:04:21,729 --> 00:04:23,206
- Look, at that will do it...
93
00:04:23,230 --> 00:04:26,565
- Place in a medium
oven for 15 minutes.
94
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:33,283
- Uh, Lisa, don't you think
you ought to use a pan?
95
00:04:33,307 --> 00:04:34,684
- For what?
96
00:04:34,708 --> 00:04:35,985
- To bake the cake.
97
00:04:36,009 --> 00:04:38,455
- But it doesn't
say so on the box.
98
00:04:38,479 --> 00:04:39,723
- Well, I know, but I...
99
00:04:39,747 --> 00:04:41,791
- Will you let me know
when it's 15 minutes?
100
00:04:41,815 --> 00:04:44,594
Uh, I, uh...
101
00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:47,196
- Oh, and also answer
the door, please.
102
00:04:47,220 --> 00:04:48,220
- Uh, yeah.
103
00:04:50,157 --> 00:04:51,401
- Think you better knock again.
104
00:04:51,425 --> 00:04:53,403
- No, shh. I hear him comin'.
105
00:04:53,427 --> 00:04:54,571
Smile.
106
00:05:00,301 --> 00:05:01,478
- What the...
107
00:05:01,502 --> 00:05:03,946
- Mr. Douglas, don't
you look generous today?
108
00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,515
Don't he look generous, Fred?
109
00:05:05,539 --> 00:05:07,606
- Oh, he sure does.
- Uh...
110
00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:09,586
- May we come in?
111
00:05:09,610 --> 00:05:11,821
- Yes, yes. Come in!
112
00:05:11,845 --> 00:05:13,823
- Wipe your feet, Fred.
113
00:05:13,847 --> 00:05:15,858
- Hey, hey, why
don't you wipe yours?
114
00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:18,861
- Because I don't
own a pig farm.
115
00:05:23,190 --> 00:05:25,067
- Well, gentlemen, what can I...
- Oliver!
116
00:05:25,091 --> 00:05:27,370
Is the 15 minutes up?
117
00:05:27,394 --> 00:05:28,605
- Lisa, you just...
118
00:05:28,629 --> 00:05:31,408
- Oh! Hello,
Mr. Ziffel, Mr. Haney.
119
00:05:31,432 --> 00:05:32,642
- Oh, hello, Mrs. Douglas.
120
00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:34,477
- Mrs. Douglas,
if you don't look
121
00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:37,280
as pretty as a possum
climbin' out of a barrel
122
00:05:37,304 --> 00:05:38,637
of new sour gum.
123
00:05:39,573 --> 00:05:40,784
- Why thank you.
124
00:05:40,808 --> 00:05:42,251
- Thank you, what does that...
125
00:05:42,275 --> 00:05:44,253
- Just wait, I'll give you boys
a piece of chocolate cake
126
00:05:44,277 --> 00:05:45,888
if you can wait 15 minutes.
127
00:05:45,912 --> 00:05:48,413
- We'd be peckerwood proud to.
128
00:05:49,650 --> 00:05:51,361
- Lisa, that cake
isn't going to...
129
00:05:51,385 --> 00:05:53,663
- Let me know
when it's 15 minutes.
130
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:56,299
- Dog gone, Mr. Douglas,
it don't seem fair,
131
00:05:56,323 --> 00:05:58,901
you havin' a
beautiful wife like that,
132
00:05:58,925 --> 00:06:01,738
livin' in a expensive
place like this,
133
00:06:01,762 --> 00:06:03,973
havin' all that
money in the bank.
134
00:06:03,997 --> 00:06:05,475
- Money?
135
00:06:05,499 --> 00:06:07,176
- It's strange that you
should mention that word.
136
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:09,713
Ain't it, Fred?
- I didn't...
137
00:06:09,737 --> 00:06:10,980
- Haney, cut out
the double talk.
138
00:06:11,004 --> 00:06:12,415
Let's get down to business.
139
00:06:12,439 --> 00:06:14,606
Mr. Douglas, we need $500.
140
00:06:15,476 --> 00:06:16,476
- $500?
141
00:06:17,745 --> 00:06:20,890
- Strange you should mention
that amount, Mr. Douglas.
142
00:06:20,914 --> 00:06:22,459
- Haney.
143
00:06:22,483 --> 00:06:23,893
Will you lend it to us?
144
00:06:23,917 --> 00:06:27,263
- Well, uh, would you mind
telling me what you need it for?
145
00:06:27,287 --> 00:06:28,598
- Investment.
146
00:06:28,622 --> 00:06:31,000
- It's gonna make
us a million dollars,
147
00:06:31,024 --> 00:06:33,536
and we're gonna
cut you in for a half
148
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:34,826
of one percent.
149
00:06:36,029 --> 00:06:39,409
- Uh, yes, but what kind
of an investment is it?
150
00:06:39,433 --> 00:06:41,978
- You're gettin' a
little nosy, ain't ya?
151
00:06:42,002 --> 00:06:43,380
- Well, if you want
to borrow it from me,
152
00:06:43,404 --> 00:06:44,614
I think I have a
perfect right to...
153
00:06:44,638 --> 00:06:47,316
- Is the 15 minutes up?
154
00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:50,086
- No, it's...
- You let me know.
155
00:06:50,110 --> 00:06:51,354
- Yes.
156
00:06:51,378 --> 00:06:52,355
- Oh, you're gonna
lend us the money?
157
00:06:52,379 --> 00:06:53,256
- No!
158
00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:55,458
- But you just said yes.
159
00:06:55,482 --> 00:06:57,159
- I was talking to my wife.
160
00:06:57,183 --> 00:06:59,161
- What about?
- Well...
161
00:06:59,185 --> 00:07:00,430
- Where do you
keep your checkbook?
162
00:07:00,454 --> 00:07:03,299
- Oh, we oughta get it in cash.
163
00:07:03,323 --> 00:07:04,501
- You're not getting a cent
164
00:07:04,525 --> 00:07:06,503
unless you tell me
what you need it for.
165
00:07:06,527 --> 00:07:08,705
- Should we let him in on it?
166
00:07:08,729 --> 00:07:11,107
- You think we can trust him?
167
00:07:11,131 --> 00:07:14,677
- He's the only one we
know that's got $500.
168
00:07:14,701 --> 00:07:16,713
- Well, that sounds
like a good reason.
169
00:07:16,737 --> 00:07:18,448
Show it to him.
170
00:07:18,472 --> 00:07:19,549
- There you are.
171
00:07:19,573 --> 00:07:21,418
Now, may we have a check?
172
00:07:21,442 --> 00:07:22,351
- For what?
173
00:07:22,375 --> 00:07:23,553
- What's it look like?
174
00:07:23,577 --> 00:07:25,076
- Milk?
- Taste it.
175
00:07:28,515 --> 00:07:30,927
- What's it taste like?
176
00:07:30,951 --> 00:07:31,861
- Milk.
177
00:07:31,885 --> 00:07:34,664
- Good. The money, please?
178
00:07:34,688 --> 00:07:38,601
- I'm not giving you $500
just for a taste of milk!
179
00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:41,203
- Well, you would if you
knew where it come from!
180
00:07:41,227 --> 00:07:43,306
- I assume it came from a cow!
181
00:07:43,330 --> 00:07:46,476
That shows how dumb you are.
182
00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:47,944
- What?
183
00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:51,681
- Mr. Douglas, this milk was
hand made by a machine.
184
00:07:51,705 --> 00:07:53,115
- A machine?
185
00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:56,486
- Right. Luke Needlinger's
milk-makin' machine.
186
00:07:56,510 --> 00:07:59,522
You put hay in one end
of it, put on the switch,
187
00:07:59,546 --> 00:08:01,858
milk comes out the other end.
188
00:08:01,882 --> 00:08:03,059
- What?
189
00:08:03,083 --> 00:08:05,495
- It's the greatest
thing since Bellmeister
190
00:08:05,519 --> 00:08:08,431
invented the peach pitter.
191
00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:09,866
- I never heard of...
192
00:08:09,890 --> 00:08:13,436
- That's the one that
revolutionized fruit salad.
193
00:08:13,460 --> 00:08:15,705
- You two don't really
believe that it's possible
194
00:08:15,729 --> 00:08:17,707
for a machine to make milk?
195
00:08:17,731 --> 00:08:19,308
- Ah, we sure do.
196
00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:22,211
And it'll replace the cow.
197
00:08:22,235 --> 00:08:24,647
- You are out of your minds!
198
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:26,382
- That's what they
told Bellmeister
199
00:08:26,406 --> 00:08:28,885
when he come up
with the peach pitter.
200
00:08:28,909 --> 00:08:31,721
But last year, the
fruit salad people
201
00:08:31,745 --> 00:08:35,191
threw him a testimonial banquet.
202
00:08:35,215 --> 00:08:38,227
- Look, you cannot
make milk with a machine!
203
00:08:38,251 --> 00:08:40,129
- Well, that's beside the point.
204
00:08:40,153 --> 00:08:41,664
Are you gonna lend us the money?
205
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:44,968
- I most certainly am
not, and if I were you,
206
00:08:44,992 --> 00:08:48,004
I'd forget the whole thing.
207
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:52,008
- Mr. Douglas, we didn't
come over to get your advice,
208
00:08:52,032 --> 00:08:53,776
we come over to get your money.
209
00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:55,011
Come on, Haney.
210
00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:00,884
- Of all the...
211
00:09:00,908 --> 00:09:03,653
- Oliver, where is
Mr. Ziffel and Mr. Haney?
212
00:09:03,677 --> 00:09:04,888
- They left.
213
00:09:04,912 --> 00:09:06,523
- But I was just going
to give them some cake.
214
00:09:06,547 --> 00:09:09,025
I was just going to
take it out of the oven.
215
00:09:09,049 --> 00:09:11,528
- Lisa, all you're going
to find in that oven...
216
00:09:15,989 --> 00:09:18,823
Well, I'll be a...
How is that a...
217
00:09:19,793 --> 00:09:21,004
Ooh!
218
00:09:21,028 --> 00:09:22,794
How did you... - Taste it!
219
00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:30,847
- It's good!
220
00:09:30,871 --> 00:09:34,706
- That's why they say you can't
make a booboo with Bibble's!
221
00:09:40,781 --> 00:09:43,693
- I told them not to go over
and bother you, Mr. Douglas.
222
00:09:43,717 --> 00:09:44,894
- May I have another box
223
00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:46,663
of Bibble's chocolate
cake mix, please?
224
00:09:46,687 --> 00:09:48,364
- Yes, ma'am.
225
00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:50,900
I sure am glad you didn't lend
them the money, Mr. Douglas.
226
00:09:50,924 --> 00:09:52,835
- Believe me, I'm not
lending anybody money
227
00:09:52,859 --> 00:09:55,171
to put into some kind
of a phony machine.
228
00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:56,806
- How do you know it's foamy?
229
00:09:56,830 --> 00:09:57,941
- Did you say chocolate?
230
00:09:57,965 --> 00:09:59,442
- No, I said foamy.
231
00:09:59,466 --> 00:10:00,710
- It's phony.
232
00:10:00,734 --> 00:10:02,011
- Oh, not it isn't, Mr. Douglas.
233
00:10:02,035 --> 00:10:03,646
You just put in the
eggs and the milk...
234
00:10:03,670 --> 00:10:06,348
- I'm talking about the
milk-making machine.
235
00:10:06,372 --> 00:10:08,150
- Why couldn't that work?
236
00:10:08,174 --> 00:10:10,152
- Because it's ridiculous.
237
00:10:10,176 --> 00:10:11,721
- Well, you said
that about Bibble's,
238
00:10:11,745 --> 00:10:14,891
but I noticed you're
eating the cake.
239
00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:16,960
- Uh, look, you
know this Needlinger?
240
00:10:16,984 --> 00:10:18,895
- Oh yeah, he's a
crackpot inventor.
241
00:10:18,919 --> 00:10:22,999
- Now why would anybody
want to invent a cracked pot?
242
00:10:23,023 --> 00:10:26,368
- Not, not a... he
means he's a nut.
243
00:10:26,392 --> 00:10:29,639
- Oh! Oh, that's what
they said about Ziggety.
244
00:10:29,663 --> 00:10:30,673
- Who's Ziggety?
245
00:10:30,697 --> 00:10:31,908
- He's a fellow in Budapest
246
00:10:31,932 --> 00:10:35,244
who invented the
electric light bulb.
247
00:10:35,268 --> 00:10:37,146
- I believe that was Edison.
248
00:10:37,170 --> 00:10:40,249
- That's right! Edison Ziggety.
249
00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:42,418
He was a very good
friend of my fathers,
250
00:10:42,442 --> 00:10:45,321
and if my father had
invested in his light bulbs,
251
00:10:45,345 --> 00:10:47,389
he would have been
a millionaire today!
252
00:10:47,413 --> 00:10:48,390
- Why didn't he?
253
00:10:48,414 --> 00:10:51,393
- Mr. Ziggety never asked him.
254
00:10:51,417 --> 00:10:52,662
- It's just as well,
255
00:10:52,686 --> 00:10:54,731
your father would have
drunk it all up anyway.
256
00:10:54,755 --> 00:10:55,999
- Why, Oliver!
257
00:10:56,023 --> 00:10:57,066
- Oh, hi, Hank!
258
00:10:57,090 --> 00:10:58,234
- Oh, hi, Sam.
259
00:10:58,258 --> 00:10:59,602
Mr. Douglas, Mrs. Douglas.
260
00:10:59,626 --> 00:11:01,403
Yeah. Did I leave anybody out?
261
00:11:01,427 --> 00:11:02,872
- Mr. Kimball.
262
00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:05,808
- Sorry, Mr. Kimball,
didn't mean to slight ya.
263
00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:07,309
- Oh, you're all dressed up!
264
00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:09,445
- Yes, I'm on my way
over to see the chief,
265
00:11:09,469 --> 00:11:12,915
punch him in the
nose, and then resign.
266
00:11:12,939 --> 00:11:15,685
Or should I resign first and
then punch him in the nose?
267
00:11:15,709 --> 00:11:17,620
No, I guess...
- Why are you resigning?
268
00:11:17,644 --> 00:11:19,722
- Not gonna be a
county agent anymore.
269
00:11:19,746 --> 00:11:20,957
Got a better job.
270
00:11:20,981 --> 00:11:21,924
- Doing what?
271
00:11:21,948 --> 00:11:24,260
- I'm gonna be a millionaire.
272
00:11:24,284 --> 00:11:27,030
- Oh! I'm glad to see
you getting ahead.
273
00:11:27,054 --> 00:11:29,766
- Yeah, he could use one.
274
00:11:29,790 --> 00:11:31,868
How do you figure to
become a millionaire?
275
00:11:31,892 --> 00:11:33,136
- Can you people keep a secret?
276
00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:34,203
- Yes.
277
00:11:34,227 --> 00:11:35,437
- Good.
278
00:11:35,461 --> 00:11:37,774
Well, I'll be seeing you.
279
00:11:37,798 --> 00:11:39,475
- Wait a second!
280
00:11:39,499 --> 00:11:40,710
- Well, I haven't got much time!
281
00:11:40,734 --> 00:11:42,478
I gotta get over to the
bank before it closes.
282
00:11:42,502 --> 00:11:44,002
Gonna borrow $500.
283
00:11:45,138 --> 00:11:46,138
- 500?
284
00:11:48,274 --> 00:11:50,653
Mr. Kimball, you're
not thinking of investing
285
00:11:50,677 --> 00:11:53,089
in a milk-making
machine, are you?
286
00:11:53,113 --> 00:11:56,559
- Oh no, I'm
gonna invest in a...
287
00:11:56,583 --> 00:11:58,961
Yes, I guess it is a
milk-making machine.
288
00:11:58,985 --> 00:12:01,898
- There is no such thing
as a milk-making machine.
289
00:12:01,922 --> 00:12:03,733
- Where'd you hear about that?
290
00:12:03,757 --> 00:12:05,568
- Hank, you're not
really going to invest
291
00:12:05,592 --> 00:12:07,704
in that stupid
machine of Luke's.
292
00:12:07,728 --> 00:12:09,538
- Oh, I never saw
his stupid machine.
293
00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:12,541
All I saw was his
milk-making machine.
294
00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:15,044
- Well, Hank, that Needlinger's
nothing but a screwball.
295
00:12:15,068 --> 00:12:17,146
- Not Loony Luke.
296
00:12:17,170 --> 00:12:18,280
- Loony Luke?
297
00:12:18,304 --> 00:12:19,515
- He's brilliant.
298
00:12:19,539 --> 00:12:20,449
Why, he's invented more things
299
00:12:20,473 --> 00:12:22,384
than you can shake a stick at.
300
00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:23,753
As a matter of fact,
I think he invented
301
00:12:23,777 --> 00:12:26,455
an automatic stick-shaker.
302
00:12:26,479 --> 00:12:27,924
- He did?
303
00:12:27,948 --> 00:12:30,760
Mr. Ziggety tried for years
to invent one of those.
304
00:12:30,784 --> 00:12:31,994
- Lisa, will you...
305
00:12:32,018 --> 00:12:33,562
- Well, I'd better
get to the bank.
306
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,965
- Ah, hold it, Mr. Kimball.
307
00:12:35,989 --> 00:12:39,001
Look, I hate to see you
borrow money and quit your job
308
00:12:39,025 --> 00:12:41,804
without having somebody
investigate this thing first.
309
00:12:41,828 --> 00:12:43,106
- That makes sense, Hank.
310
00:12:43,130 --> 00:12:44,240
- It does?
311
00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:45,742
- Yeah.
312
00:12:45,766 --> 00:12:48,144
Let me see just what this
Needlinger's trying to pull.
313
00:12:48,168 --> 00:12:50,446
- Oh, with his machine
you don't pull anything!
314
00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:53,149
You just press a...
- I know!
315
00:12:53,173 --> 00:12:54,683
- Look, where can I find him?
316
00:12:54,707 --> 00:12:56,485
- Well, he lives
up in the hills.
317
00:12:56,509 --> 00:12:57,754
Now you take the county road
318
00:12:57,778 --> 00:12:59,588
'til you come to
a tall pine tree,
319
00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:00,823
then you turn left and you come
320
00:13:00,847 --> 00:13:02,391
to a bridge that's
been washed out.
321
00:13:02,415 --> 00:13:03,893
Now you drive over the bridge...
322
00:13:03,917 --> 00:13:06,195
- Whoa now, how can
I drive over a bridge
323
00:13:06,219 --> 00:13:07,764
that's been washed out?
324
00:13:07,788 --> 00:13:10,967
Oh, that's one of
Luke's best inventions.
325
00:13:10,991 --> 00:13:12,168
- I'll find it.
326
00:13:22,568 --> 00:13:23,568
- Come in!
327
00:13:26,807 --> 00:13:28,017
- Mr. Needlinger?
328
00:13:28,041 --> 00:13:30,519
I'll be with you in a minute!
329
00:13:30,543 --> 00:13:34,257
I'm just testing my
wristwatch TV set.
330
00:13:34,281 --> 00:13:35,892
- Your wristwatch TV...
331
00:13:35,916 --> 00:13:37,960
Ahh, dog gone it,
332
00:13:37,984 --> 00:13:40,329
them Beverly
Hillbillies are funny!
333
00:13:40,353 --> 00:13:42,331
You wanna see 'em?
334
00:13:42,355 --> 00:13:43,766
Oh, there's no picture.
335
00:13:43,790 --> 00:13:46,235
- Oh, dog gone, my color tube
336
00:13:46,259 --> 00:13:48,426
must have blown out again.
337
00:13:49,696 --> 00:13:51,674
- That's a wonderful invention!
338
00:13:51,698 --> 00:13:53,075
- Lisa, I've seen
enough, let's...
339
00:13:53,099 --> 00:13:55,644
- But we didn't see the
milk-making machine yet!
340
00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:59,115
Oh, that's right over here!
341
00:13:59,139 --> 00:14:01,450
There she is.
342
00:14:01,474 --> 00:14:02,584
- That's wonderful!
343
00:14:02,608 --> 00:14:04,854
Is this just an ordinary sheet?
344
00:14:04,878 --> 00:14:07,456
- Yes, ma'am.
- And you get milk out of it?
345
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:08,691
- Oh, no, no, no.
346
00:14:08,715 --> 00:14:11,760
That's just the cover.
347
00:14:11,784 --> 00:14:12,851
There, there.
348
00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:16,565
- That's the thing
that makes the milk?
349
00:14:16,589 --> 00:14:19,202
- What else could
you use it for?
350
00:14:19,226 --> 00:14:20,636
Could we see it work?
351
00:14:20,660 --> 00:14:22,138
- Well, yes, of course.
352
00:14:22,162 --> 00:14:24,406
You see, it works on the
same principle as the cow.
353
00:14:24,430 --> 00:14:26,309
- How do they work?
354
00:14:26,333 --> 00:14:28,711
- Well, a cow has four stomachs,
355
00:14:28,735 --> 00:14:31,513
and the digestive
juices in the stomach
356
00:14:31,537 --> 00:14:33,950
transforms the
hay into the milk.
357
00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:36,319
And my machine
does the same thing.
358
00:14:36,343 --> 00:14:38,787
The secret thing is the
chemicals that I put into it.
359
00:14:38,811 --> 00:14:41,224
- Now are you convinced?
360
00:14:41,248 --> 00:14:43,792
- I haven't seen anything yet!
361
00:14:43,816 --> 00:14:45,161
- I'll show ya.
362
00:14:45,185 --> 00:14:46,628
I have to put in some hay,
363
00:14:46,652 --> 00:14:48,998
and I have to be careful
not to put too much in
364
00:14:49,022 --> 00:14:53,402
because if I overfeed
the machine, it gets gas.
365
00:14:53,426 --> 00:14:54,770
- How could a machine get...
366
00:14:54,794 --> 00:14:56,772
- Now we'll start it up.
367
00:15:01,167 --> 00:15:02,578
- Is it making the milk?
368
00:15:02,602 --> 00:15:05,848
- No, ma'am. It's just
chewing up the hay.
369
00:15:07,774 --> 00:15:10,652
That's the automatic swallower.
370
00:15:10,676 --> 00:15:13,356
The automatic...
371
00:15:13,380 --> 00:15:16,825
- The digestive chemicals
are being pumped in.
372
00:15:16,849 --> 00:15:19,762
Now they're digesting,
the process is starting.
373
00:15:21,187 --> 00:15:22,999
- And this is gonna
come out milk?
374
00:15:23,023 --> 00:15:25,368
- Yes, as soon as
the gong sounds.
375
00:15:35,802 --> 00:15:37,113
You want to taste it?
376
00:15:37,137 --> 00:15:38,970
- No thanks, I've already...
- Let me.
377
00:15:42,309 --> 00:15:43,474
Mm! It's good!
378
00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:46,755
- Mr. Needlinger, may
I congratulate you?
379
00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:50,592
That is one of the hokiest
contraptions I have ever seen.
380
00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:53,162
- Oliver, are you
insulting Mr. Needlinger?
381
00:15:53,186 --> 00:15:55,564
- He's insulting me
trying to make me believe
382
00:15:55,588 --> 00:15:58,700
that this thing could
actually manufacture milk.
383
00:15:58,724 --> 00:16:00,369
- Well, it must have!
384
00:16:00,393 --> 00:16:02,271
Where else did
the milk come from?
385
00:16:02,295 --> 00:16:04,440
- It was in the
tank to begin with!
386
00:16:04,464 --> 00:16:05,641
- How do you know?
387
00:16:05,665 --> 00:16:07,476
- Well, you'll notice
the tank is closed
388
00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:09,312
so you can't see inside.
389
00:16:09,336 --> 00:16:12,214
- Oh, oh, but I'll
let you see inside.
390
00:16:12,238 --> 00:16:13,238
Here, look.
391
00:16:15,408 --> 00:16:18,054
- Oh that's impossible.
392
00:16:18,078 --> 00:16:21,412
You must have it
connected to something.
393
00:16:23,783 --> 00:16:24,783
Uh,
394
00:16:26,086 --> 00:16:27,463
well, no, it's not.
395
00:16:27,487 --> 00:16:30,099
- Oliver, you owe
Mr. Needlinger an apology.
396
00:16:30,123 --> 00:16:31,567
- Oh, that's all right, ma'am.
397
00:16:31,591 --> 00:16:34,403
People are always skeptical
about new inventions.
398
00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:37,173
- Yes, I can imagine
what they said to Julius
399
00:16:37,197 --> 00:16:39,908
when he invented the orange.
400
00:16:39,932 --> 00:16:41,543
- To Julius when
he invented the...
401
00:16:41,567 --> 00:16:43,012
- Mm-hmm.
402
00:16:43,036 --> 00:16:45,181
- Look, Mr. Needlinger,
403
00:16:45,205 --> 00:16:48,184
if this really works,
it's worth millions,
404
00:16:48,208 --> 00:16:49,585
and yet you're willing
to sell a share of it
405
00:16:49,609 --> 00:16:50,609
for $500.
406
00:16:51,777 --> 00:16:54,823
- Experimenting is expensive,
and I need chemicals.
407
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:57,559
- Look, I've got a
friend in New York
408
00:16:57,583 --> 00:16:58,961
I'd like to bring out here.
409
00:16:58,985 --> 00:17:02,264
- What do you want to
bring her out here for?
410
00:17:02,288 --> 00:17:04,500
- It's not a her, it's
Charlie Williams.
411
00:17:04,524 --> 00:17:05,734
He's the chief chemist
412
00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:07,803
for the Hoffenbacker
Chemical Company.
413
00:17:07,827 --> 00:17:10,272
Now, would you object to
his looking at your machine?
414
00:17:10,296 --> 00:17:12,397
- Oh, no! No, not at all!
415
00:17:27,213 --> 00:17:28,213
- Hello?
416
00:17:28,981 --> 00:17:29,981
Who?
417
00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:32,217
Douglas?
418
00:17:33,486 --> 00:17:34,630
Put him on.
419
00:17:34,654 --> 00:17:36,565
- Hello, Charlie! Oliver
Wendell Douglas.
420
00:17:36,589 --> 00:17:38,700
- Oliver Wendell?
421
00:17:38,724 --> 00:17:41,303
- Remember, I was your
roommate at Harvard!
422
00:17:41,327 --> 00:17:43,561
- Oh, Dimples, how are you?
423
00:17:44,964 --> 00:17:46,808
Well, I don't have
dimples anymore.
424
00:17:46,832 --> 00:17:47,876
- Oliver!
425
00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:49,678
Who are you talking to?
426
00:17:49,702 --> 00:17:51,047
- Charlie Williams.
427
00:17:51,071 --> 00:17:53,082
- Oh? Send him my love.
428
00:17:53,106 --> 00:17:54,783
- Yeah, Lisa sends her love.
429
00:17:54,807 --> 00:17:55,884
- Who's Lisa?
430
00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:57,086
- My wife!
431
00:17:57,110 --> 00:17:58,887
- Oh, you finally
married that redhead.
432
00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:01,790
- No, I broke up
with the redhead.
433
00:18:01,814 --> 00:18:03,047
- What redhead?
434
00:18:03,916 --> 00:18:05,827
- The one I broke up with.
435
00:18:05,851 --> 00:18:07,563
No, no, Lisa's a blonde.
436
00:18:07,587 --> 00:18:09,465
- Oh, the airline hostess!
437
00:18:09,489 --> 00:18:11,333
- No, that was another blonde.
438
00:18:11,357 --> 00:18:14,170
- Who was another blonde?
439
00:18:14,194 --> 00:18:15,904
- The airline hostess.
440
00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:18,040
- Well, we're going to
have a lot to talk about
441
00:18:18,064 --> 00:18:20,943
when you climb down from there.
442
00:18:20,967 --> 00:18:23,645
Lisa, will you
just... hello, Charlie?
443
00:18:23,669 --> 00:18:24,613
- What happened to you, Dimp?
444
00:18:24,637 --> 00:18:26,515
You just dropped out of sight!
445
00:18:26,539 --> 00:18:28,217
- I gave up my law practice.
446
00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:29,651
I bought myself a farm!
447
00:18:29,675 --> 00:18:30,752
- Sounds great.
448
00:18:30,776 --> 00:18:31,987
- Oh, it is.
449
00:18:32,011 --> 00:18:34,356
You'll see for yourself
when you get out here.
450
00:18:34,380 --> 00:18:35,524
- Get where?
451
00:18:35,548 --> 00:18:36,459
- Hooterville!
452
00:18:36,483 --> 00:18:38,194
- Rooterville?
453
00:18:38,218 --> 00:18:40,496
- No, no, hooter! Hooterville!
454
00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:44,500
- And why do I want to
go to Hooterhooterville?
455
00:18:44,524 --> 00:18:47,836
- No, no, it has
just one hooter in it.
456
00:18:47,860 --> 00:18:50,506
- Well, it's been
nice talking to ya!
457
00:18:50,530 --> 00:18:51,940
- Wait a minute.
458
00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:53,909
I have something I
want you to look at.
459
00:18:53,933 --> 00:18:55,111
- What is it?
460
00:18:55,135 --> 00:18:57,546
- It's a milk-making machine.
461
00:18:57,570 --> 00:18:59,448
- Milk-making?
462
00:18:59,472 --> 00:19:02,418
What bar are you calling from?
463
00:19:02,442 --> 00:19:03,586
- No, I'm not in a bar,
464
00:19:03,610 --> 00:19:05,421
I'm on top of a telephone pole.
465
00:19:05,445 --> 00:19:08,324
- Boy, you really are high.
466
00:19:08,348 --> 00:19:10,859
- Charlie, I'm telling you
there's a man out here
467
00:19:10,883 --> 00:19:13,329
who invented a
machine that makes milk.
468
00:19:13,353 --> 00:19:15,097
Or it seems to.
469
00:19:15,121 --> 00:19:18,200
Yes, he puts hay in
one end, he turns it on,
470
00:19:18,224 --> 00:19:20,569
and real milk comes
out of the other end.
471
00:19:20,593 --> 00:19:23,205
- Oliver, next time
you're in New York,
472
00:19:23,229 --> 00:19:25,474
let's have lunch together.
473
00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:27,009
- Now Charlie, you
know better than I do
474
00:19:27,033 --> 00:19:28,844
the things that be
made synthetically.
475
00:19:28,868 --> 00:19:30,078
Rubber, nylon!
476
00:19:30,102 --> 00:19:33,549
- And this machine
makes that, too?
477
00:19:33,573 --> 00:19:34,983
- No, no, just milk.
478
00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:36,652
Charlie, with the world facing
a foot shortage someday,
479
00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:39,021
a machine like this
would be invaluable.
480
00:19:39,045 --> 00:19:40,489
Now if you'll just
come out and look at it.
481
00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:44,226
- I'd love to, but I'm
very busy here at the lab
482
00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:47,696
developing our automatic
egg-laying machine.
483
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:49,598
You put chicken feed in one end
484
00:19:49,622 --> 00:19:51,955
and eggs come out the other!
485
00:19:53,092 --> 00:19:55,638
- Look, you don't
have to be sarcastic.
486
00:19:55,662 --> 00:19:57,806
- Oliver...
- Look, if I send you a sample
487
00:19:57,830 --> 00:19:59,708
of the milk that the
machine makes,
488
00:19:59,732 --> 00:20:01,177
maybe that'll convince you.
489
00:20:01,201 --> 00:20:02,411
- All right.
490
00:20:02,435 --> 00:20:04,380
You send it along
and I'll analyze it.
491
00:20:04,404 --> 00:20:05,614
- Oh, great, great.
492
00:20:05,638 --> 00:20:07,949
And, uh, look, Charlie,
493
00:20:07,973 --> 00:20:11,387
I wouldn't want this to
get around, you know.
494
00:20:11,411 --> 00:20:12,921
Keep it under your hat.
495
00:20:12,945 --> 00:20:14,690
- Oh, don't worry about that!
496
00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:16,046
Goodbye, Oliver!
497
00:20:17,983 --> 00:20:20,128
Milk-making machine.
498
00:20:23,723 --> 00:20:25,867
- Lisa, have you got a pen?
499
00:20:25,891 --> 00:20:29,171
- Oh, you're going to
write to the redhead?
500
00:20:29,195 --> 00:20:31,240
- No, I want to address
this milk sample
501
00:20:31,264 --> 00:20:32,708
to Charlie Williams.
502
00:20:32,732 --> 00:20:35,744
- Then you're going
to write to the redhead.
503
00:20:35,768 --> 00:20:39,915
- If you don't stop bugging
me about her, I may.
504
00:20:39,939 --> 00:20:43,552
- All right, I won't bug you
about the redhead anymore.
505
00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:44,820
- Good.
506
00:20:44,844 --> 00:20:47,122
- Let's get to the
blonde hostess.
507
00:20:47,146 --> 00:20:48,757
- Look, isn't there
a pen in the house?
508
00:20:48,781 --> 00:20:51,860
- No, all we have in this
house is a jealous wife
509
00:20:51,884 --> 00:20:54,930
that wants to know
about the blonde hostess.
510
00:20:54,954 --> 00:20:57,766
- You can read all about
her when I write my memoirs.
511
00:20:57,790 --> 00:21:01,002
- How can you write your
memoirs when you can't find a pen?
512
00:21:01,026 --> 00:21:03,739
- I'll address it at Drucker's.
513
00:21:03,763 --> 00:21:06,108
- Oliver, if you
walk out that door
514
00:21:06,132 --> 00:21:08,410
without telling me
about the hostess,
515
00:21:08,434 --> 00:21:10,212
don't bother coming back.
516
00:21:16,876 --> 00:21:18,019
Oliver!
517
00:21:18,043 --> 00:21:19,421
Oliver!
518
00:21:19,445 --> 00:21:21,557
You forgot to kiss me goodbye!
519
00:21:21,581 --> 00:21:24,727
Oh, for the love of...
520
00:21:24,751 --> 00:21:26,995
- Well, that's a
pretty cheesy kiss
521
00:21:27,019 --> 00:21:29,064
for a fellow who
isn't coming back.
522
00:21:29,088 --> 00:21:30,366
- Look, Lisa, I
have to mail this.
523
00:21:30,390 --> 00:21:31,555
- Mr. Douglas?
524
00:21:32,958 --> 00:21:34,836
Mr. Douglas, you'd better
come into the barn right away.
525
00:21:34,860 --> 00:21:35,871
- What's the matter?
526
00:21:35,895 --> 00:21:36,705
- It's Eleanor.
527
00:21:36,729 --> 00:21:37,673
- What's wrong with her?
528
00:21:37,697 --> 00:21:38,874
- She won't give any milk!
529
00:21:38,898 --> 00:21:41,343
She's on strike!
- On...
530
00:21:41,367 --> 00:21:42,645
- Every time I try to milk her,
531
00:21:42,669 --> 00:21:46,081
she sits down on
her business end!
532
00:21:46,105 --> 00:21:47,115
- Oh, the poor thing.
533
00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:48,617
She must be sick!
534
00:21:48,641 --> 00:21:49,951
- No, ma'am, she's rebelling.
535
00:21:49,975 --> 00:21:51,587
She heard Mr. Douglas
was replacing her
536
00:21:51,611 --> 00:21:53,822
with a milk-making machine.
537
00:21:53,846 --> 00:21:55,391
- I know just how she feels.
538
00:21:55,415 --> 00:21:59,027
He tried to replace
me with a redhead.
539
00:21:59,051 --> 00:22:00,896
- I'm beginning to wish I had.
540
00:22:00,920 --> 00:22:01,863
- Well!
541
00:22:01,887 --> 00:22:03,064
- I tried to tell Eleanor
542
00:22:03,088 --> 00:22:04,866
that she didn't have
anything to worry about,
543
00:22:04,890 --> 00:22:06,935
but she said she wanted
to hear it from you.
544
00:22:06,959 --> 00:22:08,459
- Well, you tell...
545
00:22:09,429 --> 00:22:11,106
What do you mean, "She said?"
546
00:22:11,130 --> 00:22:12,675
- She didn't
actually talk to me,
547
00:22:12,699 --> 00:22:13,842
she beat it out on the milk pail
548
00:22:13,866 --> 00:22:16,845
with her tail in Morse code!
549
00:22:16,869 --> 00:22:18,480
- Who is Morris Code?
550
00:22:18,504 --> 00:22:20,649
- No, not Morris, Morse.
551
00:22:20,673 --> 00:22:23,285
- Who is Morris Morse?
552
00:22:23,309 --> 00:22:24,520
- Ed will explain it to ya.
553
00:22:24,544 --> 00:22:27,055
I've gotta get into
town to mail this.
554
00:22:27,079 --> 00:22:29,625
- You ain't goin'
nowhere, Dimples.
555
00:22:29,649 --> 00:22:30,492
- Dimples?
556
00:22:30,516 --> 00:22:31,694
Who is she?
557
00:22:31,718 --> 00:22:33,128
- That's me, I used
to have dimples.
558
00:22:33,152 --> 00:22:35,798
Mr. Ziffel, will you
put that gun down!
559
00:22:35,822 --> 00:22:37,533
- Sorry, Dimp.
560
00:22:37,557 --> 00:22:40,035
Lucky thing Haney was
listenin' over the party line
561
00:22:40,059 --> 00:22:42,805
when you was talkin'
to your friend William.
562
00:22:42,829 --> 00:22:44,340
- He had no right to listen!
563
00:22:44,364 --> 00:22:47,576
- Oh, you're gonna sell us out
to the New York combine, huh?
564
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:48,844
- I'm not...
565
00:22:48,868 --> 00:22:50,646
- You're gonna turn over
our milk-makin' machine
566
00:22:50,670 --> 00:22:51,880
without even cuttin' us in
567
00:22:51,904 --> 00:22:55,351
on your friend's
egg-layin' machine.
568
00:22:55,375 --> 00:22:56,618
- How does that work?
569
00:22:56,642 --> 00:22:58,253
- Well, you put
chicken feed in one end,
570
00:22:58,277 --> 00:23:00,689
and an egg comes
out there other.
571
00:23:00,713 --> 00:23:02,524
- Golly diddle dumps!
572
00:23:02,548 --> 00:23:04,860
That sounds better than
the milk-makin' machine.
573
00:23:04,884 --> 00:23:06,795
I'll put some money in that!
574
00:23:06,819 --> 00:23:07,819
- So will I!
575
00:23:09,021 --> 00:23:10,666
- There's no such
thing, Mr. Ziffel.
576
00:23:10,690 --> 00:23:13,301
All I'm doing is sending a
sample of the milk to my friend!
577
00:23:13,325 --> 00:23:14,770
He's gonna analyze
it and let me know
578
00:23:14,794 --> 00:23:16,727
if it's worth anything!
579
00:23:19,399 --> 00:23:20,342
- Mr. Douglas?
580
00:23:20,366 --> 00:23:21,366
Mr. Douglas!
581
00:23:23,068 --> 00:23:24,580
- Oh, yes, gentlemen.
582
00:23:24,604 --> 00:23:26,937
Come on in!
- Oh, thank you.
583
00:23:28,340 --> 00:23:30,486
- Well, we come over soon
as we got your message
584
00:23:30,510 --> 00:23:32,454
about your New
York friend caller.
585
00:23:32,478 --> 00:23:34,757
- Yeah, are we millionaires?
586
00:23:34,781 --> 00:23:37,192
- Uh, let me explain.
587
00:23:37,216 --> 00:23:38,960
He analyzed the
sample and he said
588
00:23:38,984 --> 00:23:41,597
that chemically,
it resembles milk.
589
00:23:41,621 --> 00:23:43,565
- Yeah, we know.
We been drinkin' it.
590
00:23:43,589 --> 00:23:45,100
- How rich are we?
591
00:23:45,124 --> 00:23:46,635
- Just a second now.
592
00:23:46,659 --> 00:23:49,538
Charlie's analysis showed
that the sample contained water,
593
00:23:49,562 --> 00:23:52,173
butterfat solids, lactic acid,
594
00:23:52,197 --> 00:23:55,711
and a chemical called
aquanitrichyperchloride.
595
00:23:55,735 --> 00:23:57,245
- What's that?
596
00:23:57,269 --> 00:24:00,215
- Well, it's a very expensive
chemical that Needlinger used.
597
00:24:00,239 --> 00:24:01,316
- Ah, leave it Luke.
598
00:24:01,340 --> 00:24:03,519
Nothin' but the best.
599
00:24:03,543 --> 00:24:04,953
- Yeah, yeah, the best.
600
00:24:04,977 --> 00:24:06,889
Well, Charlie figured
out, that by using it,
601
00:24:06,913 --> 00:24:10,358
it would make the
milk cost $40 a quart.
602
00:24:10,382 --> 00:24:11,593
- That's no problem.
603
00:24:11,617 --> 00:24:13,350
We'll sell it for 50.
604
00:24:14,386 --> 00:24:16,164
- Good thinking.
605
00:24:16,188 --> 00:24:17,433
Well, not good thinking.
606
00:24:17,457 --> 00:24:19,401
- There's one other
problem, gentlemen.
607
00:24:19,425 --> 00:24:20,803
- What's that?
608
00:24:20,827 --> 00:24:23,238
- Aquanitrichyperchloride
has a side effect.
609
00:24:23,262 --> 00:24:24,807
- Oh.
610
00:24:24,831 --> 00:24:26,775
What side does it effect?
611
00:24:26,799 --> 00:24:27,910
- Your head.
612
00:24:27,934 --> 00:24:30,446
It causes temporary baldness.
613
00:24:30,470 --> 00:24:31,470
- It does?
614
00:24:36,676 --> 00:24:38,742
- Well, I'll be dog gone.
615
00:24:39,946 --> 00:24:41,389
- I wouldn't worry about it,
616
00:24:41,413 --> 00:24:44,860
Charlie also says that it'll
grow back in about three weeks.
617
00:24:44,884 --> 00:24:47,529
- I wish I could
be sure of that.
618
00:25:28,193 --> 00:25:32,195
This has been a Filmways
presentation, darling.
40975
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