All language subtitles for Episodes (2011) - S04E01 - Episode One (1080p AMZN WEB-DL x265 Ghost)_Track03

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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,333 --> 00:00:12,083 [typing] 2 00:00:12,083 --> 00:00:14,667 - YOU HAD A SCRIPT THAT WAS GOING AROUND BACK THEN. 3 00:00:14,667 --> 00:00:17,041 IT WAS ALL ANYONE TALKED ABOUT. 4 00:00:17,041 --> 00:00:19,500 - WE ARE NOT LOOKING TO DO ANOTHER SHOW HERE. 5 00:00:19,500 --> 00:00:21,000 - CBS WANTS IN. 6 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:22,834 THAT'S THREE NETWORKS. 7 00:00:22,834 --> 00:00:25,375 - WELL, ONLY ONE IS GETTING IT. 8 00:00:25,375 --> 00:00:26,333 - THIS IS FUN. 9 00:00:26,333 --> 00:00:27,458 - WE HAVE SPENT A YEAR 10 00:00:27,458 --> 00:00:29,458 FEELING ABSOLUTELY POWERLESS. 11 00:00:29,458 --> 00:00:31,667 AS SOON AS WE SAY YES TO ONE OF THOSE FUCKERS, 12 00:00:31,667 --> 00:00:32,542 WE'RE RIGHT BACK THERE. 13 00:00:32,542 --> 00:00:33,917 BUT IF WE GO NOW, 14 00:00:33,917 --> 00:00:36,333 WITH ALL OF THEM FIGHTING OVER US, 15 00:00:36,333 --> 00:00:39,750 THAT'S AS GOOD AS IT GETS IN THIS TOWN. 16 00:00:39,750 --> 00:00:41,417 - I ALSO HEARD ABOUT MATT LEBLANC 17 00:00:41,417 --> 00:00:43,375 GETTING THAT BIG PILOT OVER AT NBC. 18 00:00:43,375 --> 00:00:44,750 - WHAT? 19 00:00:44,750 --> 00:00:46,542 HAVE WE OFFICIALLY CANCELLED PUCKS!? 20 00:00:46,542 --> 00:00:48,375 - UH, NO. 21 00:00:48,375 --> 00:00:50,250 - PICK IT UP FOR SIX MORE. 22 00:00:50,250 --> 00:00:51,750 - YOU HATE PUCKS! 23 00:00:51,750 --> 00:00:54,041 - I HATE NBC MORE. 24 00:00:54,041 --> 00:00:55,959 - ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? 25 00:00:55,959 --> 00:00:58,917 THEY CAN'T DO THAT. WE WERE CANCELLED. 26 00:00:58,917 --> 00:01:00,875 WHAT DOES "NOT OFFICIALLY" MEAN? 27 00:01:00,875 --> 00:01:02,417 - HARD TO BELIEVE THAT YESTERDAY 28 00:01:02,417 --> 00:01:03,750 WE WERE SITTING IN TRAFFIC ON THE 405. 29 00:01:03,750 --> 00:01:04,709 - HMM. 30 00:01:04,709 --> 00:01:07,583 - IT'S AN L.A. NUMBER. 31 00:01:07,583 --> 00:01:10,875 - DON'T ANSWER IT. 32 00:01:10,875 --> 00:01:13,291 OH, DEAR GOD, DON'T ANSWER IT. 33 00:01:13,291 --> 00:01:15,917 [ringing continues] 34 00:01:18,917 --> 00:01:22,291 [typing] 35 00:01:22,291 --> 00:01:23,917 [ding] 36 00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:27,709 [wind blowing] 37 00:01:32,625 --> 00:01:35,500 [upbeat music] 38 00:01:35,500 --> 00:01:43,583 ♪ ♪ 39 00:01:58,959 --> 00:02:00,792 [gunshot] 40 00:02:07,834 --> 00:02:10,875 [typing] 41 00:02:10,875 --> 00:02:12,083 [ding] 42 00:02:15,208 --> 00:02:17,959 BLOODY RIDICULOUS. 43 00:02:19,750 --> 00:02:22,417 - UTTER BULLSHIT. 44 00:02:30,875 --> 00:02:32,667 - REASON FOR ENTERING THE COUNTRY? 45 00:02:32,667 --> 00:02:35,834 - MATT LEBLANC. 46 00:02:44,208 --> 00:02:47,750 - I THREW AWAY MY I.D. I'M HERE FOR PUCKS! 47 00:02:47,750 --> 00:02:49,000 - I THOUGHT THAT WAS DEAD. 48 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:51,083 - YEAH, WELL, IT'S RISEN. LIKE JESUS. 49 00:02:51,083 --> 00:02:55,208 IF JESUS WAS A SHITTY SITCOM NO ONE WATCHED. 50 00:03:05,375 --> 00:03:07,959 - [sighs] 51 00:03:10,500 --> 00:03:13,291 MOTHERFUCKER. 52 00:03:23,375 --> 00:03:25,291 - OKAY. 53 00:03:25,291 --> 00:03:28,625 ANYTHING YOU'D LIKE TO SAY FIRST? 54 00:03:28,625 --> 00:03:30,208 - UH... 55 00:03:30,208 --> 00:03:32,709 WE WROTE THIS ON THE PLANE BACK. 56 00:03:32,709 --> 00:03:35,375 IT'S NOT VERY GOOD. 57 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:38,834 - IT'S NOT. 58 00:03:41,959 --> 00:03:43,542 - ALL RIGHTY THEN. 59 00:03:43,542 --> 00:03:44,875 UH, PAGE ONE. 60 00:03:44,875 --> 00:03:46,792 "INTERIOR LOCKER ROOM." 61 00:03:46,792 --> 00:03:49,417 WORDS I THOUGHT I'D NEVER SAY AGAIN. 62 00:03:49,417 --> 00:03:53,208 "LYMAN ENTERS." 63 00:03:55,375 --> 00:03:57,041 - NOW THE GOOD NEWS IS 64 00:03:57,041 --> 00:03:59,208 I SHUFFLED SOME STUFF AROUND, 65 00:03:59,208 --> 00:04:00,792 AND I GOT YOU YOUR OLD OFFICE BACK. 66 00:04:00,792 --> 00:04:01,875 - REALLY? 67 00:04:01,875 --> 00:04:03,750 NO ONE SNATCHED IT UP. 68 00:04:03,750 --> 00:04:06,500 - EVEN BETTER, WENDY WAS STILL AVAILABLE. 69 00:04:06,500 --> 00:04:10,375 SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO START WITH SOMEONE FROM SCRATCH. 70 00:04:10,375 --> 00:04:12,250 - HUH? 71 00:04:12,250 --> 00:04:17,208 - AND WITH ONE WORD, IT ALL COMES RUSHING BACK. 72 00:04:39,667 --> 00:04:41,750 [phone rings] 73 00:04:41,750 --> 00:04:43,417 - YO. 74 00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:44,792 - MATT, SANFORD SHAMIRO. 75 00:04:44,792 --> 00:04:46,583 - HEY, WHAT'S UP? 76 00:04:46,583 --> 00:04:48,250 - I DON'T KNOW IF YOU HEARD THE NEWS ABOUT LARRY PENZEL. 77 00:04:48,250 --> 00:04:50,458 - WHAT NEWS? 78 00:04:50,458 --> 00:04:51,750 - I'M AFRAID IT'S NOT GOOD. 79 00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:53,041 - NO? 80 00:04:53,041 --> 00:04:55,667 - LARRY KILLED HIMSELF LAST NIGHT. 81 00:04:55,667 --> 00:04:57,250 - HOLY SHIT. 82 00:04:57,250 --> 00:04:58,792 - I KNOW. IT'S UNBELIEVABLE. 83 00:04:58,792 --> 00:05:00,625 ARLENE CALLED ME THIS MORNING. 84 00:05:00,625 --> 00:05:03,834 EVIDENTLY, HE HANGED HIMSELF IN HIS GARAGE. 85 00:05:03,834 --> 00:05:05,000 - OH, MY GOD. 86 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:06,917 - HEARTBREAKING. 87 00:05:06,917 --> 00:05:09,083 - [mouthing words] 88 00:05:09,083 --> 00:05:11,500 - HIS DAUGHTER FOUND HIM. SHE'S ONLY NINE. 89 00:05:11,500 --> 00:05:13,291 - JESUS. 90 00:05:13,291 --> 00:05:15,834 - ANYWAY THE FUNERAL'S TOMORROW IF YOU WANT TO GO. 91 00:05:15,834 --> 00:05:17,166 - WELL, I GUESS I SHOULD. 92 00:05:17,166 --> 00:05:20,041 HE'S BEEN MY MONEY GUY SINCE I GOT MONEY. 93 00:05:20,041 --> 00:05:22,667 - I'LL TEXT YOU THE INFORMATION. 94 00:05:22,667 --> 00:05:26,834 AND I'M SORRY TO BE THE BEARER OF BAD NEWS. 95 00:05:26,834 --> 00:05:28,417 [horn honks] 96 00:05:28,417 --> 00:05:30,083 - [mouths words] 97 00:05:31,834 --> 00:05:33,625 - VERY UPSETTING. 98 00:05:33,625 --> 00:05:36,041 - I KNOW. 99 00:05:41,500 --> 00:05:44,333 [phone rings] 100 00:05:49,834 --> 00:05:53,291 [ringing continues] 101 00:05:53,291 --> 00:05:55,208 - YOU WANT ME TO GET THAT? 102 00:05:55,208 --> 00:05:57,959 - YES, THAT HASN'T CHANGED! 103 00:05:57,959 --> 00:06:00,375 - SEAN AND BEVERLY'S OFFICE. 104 00:06:00,375 --> 00:06:03,583 EILEEN JAFFEE ON ONE. 105 00:06:03,583 --> 00:06:05,083 - HELLO. 106 00:06:05,083 --> 00:06:06,291 - HI, GUYS. WELCOME BACK. 107 00:06:06,291 --> 00:06:08,166 DID YOU GET MY BASKET? 108 00:06:08,166 --> 00:06:09,417 - UH, I DON'T THINK SO. 109 00:06:09,417 --> 00:06:11,667 WENDY, DID WE GET A BASKET? 110 00:06:11,667 --> 00:06:12,625 - WHAT? 111 00:06:12,625 --> 00:06:13,667 - A BASKET. 112 00:06:13,667 --> 00:06:14,709 A GIFT BASKET. 113 00:06:14,709 --> 00:06:16,709 - FROM EILEEN JAFFEE. 114 00:06:16,709 --> 00:06:19,417 - YEAH. 115 00:06:19,417 --> 00:06:21,583 - CAN WE SEE IT? 116 00:06:21,583 --> 00:06:23,667 - NOT FROM THERE. 117 00:06:23,667 --> 00:06:25,875 - APPARENTLY WE DID GET IT. 118 00:06:25,875 --> 00:06:27,291 THANKS SO MUCH. 119 00:06:27,291 --> 00:06:29,667 - I'M JUST HAPPY YOU GUYS ARE BACK. 120 00:06:29,667 --> 00:06:32,125 ANYWAY, WHILE I'VE GOT YOU, 121 00:06:32,125 --> 00:06:34,709 NOW DON'T BITE MY HEAD OFF... 122 00:06:34,709 --> 00:06:36,083 - YES? 123 00:06:36,083 --> 00:06:37,458 - THE OPPOSITE OF US. 124 00:06:37,458 --> 00:06:39,000 - I HOPE YOU CAN BREATHE THROUGH YOUR NECK. 125 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:40,375 - [chuckles] 126 00:06:40,375 --> 00:06:44,041 I STILL HAVE THREE NETWORKS CLAMORING FOR IT. 127 00:06:44,041 --> 00:06:45,083 CLAMORING. 128 00:06:45,083 --> 00:06:46,625 THEY NEVER CLAMOR. 129 00:06:46,625 --> 00:06:49,250 - WELL, THEY CAN CLAMOR ALL THEY LIKE. 130 00:06:49,250 --> 00:06:50,959 - I JUST DON'T WANT YOU TO LOOK BACK SOMEDAY 131 00:06:50,959 --> 00:06:52,417 AND KICK YOURSELVES. 132 00:06:52,417 --> 00:06:55,417 THERE'S A LOT OF MONEY ON THE TABLE HERE. 133 00:06:55,417 --> 00:06:58,375 ALL I NEED IS FOR YOU TO SAY "GO." 134 00:06:58,375 --> 00:07:01,583 SAY "GO" AND I WILL MAKE IT HAPPEN. 135 00:07:01,583 --> 00:07:03,583 JUST SAY IT. 136 00:07:03,583 --> 00:07:06,667 JUST SAY "GO". 137 00:07:06,667 --> 00:07:07,959 - NO. 138 00:07:07,959 --> 00:07:09,750 - OH, MY GOD! 139 00:07:09,750 --> 00:07:10,875 - HE SAID "NO". 140 00:07:10,875 --> 00:07:12,083 - OH. 141 00:07:12,083 --> 00:07:15,583 IT SOUNDED SO MUCH LIKE "GO". 142 00:07:19,250 --> 00:07:20,792 - I'LL HAVE THE NICOISE SALAD. 143 00:07:20,792 --> 00:07:22,500 - YEAH, GIVE ME THE CHOPPED CHICKEN THING 144 00:07:22,500 --> 00:07:24,417 WITH THE ARTICHOKES. IT'S NOT ON THE MENU. 145 00:07:24,417 --> 00:07:26,208 JUST TELL THE CHEF IT'S FOR ME. 146 00:07:26,208 --> 00:07:28,917 - VERY GOOD. - [giggles] 147 00:07:28,917 --> 00:07:31,250 SO HAVE YOU BEEN AWAY? 148 00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:32,583 YOU LOOK TAN. 149 00:07:32,583 --> 00:07:34,542 - IT'S JAUNDICE. - WHAT? 150 00:07:34,542 --> 00:07:36,500 - JAUNDICE. THERE'S SOMETHING SCREWED UP WITH MY LIVER. 151 00:07:36,500 --> 00:07:38,917 THEY DON'T KNOW. THEY'RE RUNNING TESTS. 152 00:07:38,917 --> 00:07:40,458 - OH, MY GOD. 153 00:07:40,458 --> 00:07:43,667 WELL, HOPEFULLY IT'S NOTHING SERIOUS. 154 00:07:43,667 --> 00:07:44,750 - I'M YELLOW. 155 00:07:44,750 --> 00:07:45,667 - RIGHT. 156 00:07:45,667 --> 00:07:49,417 WELL, ON YOU IT LOOKS GOOD. 157 00:07:49,417 --> 00:07:52,250 HA. ANYWAY, UH... 158 00:07:52,250 --> 00:07:55,417 THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING THE TIME. 159 00:07:55,417 --> 00:07:57,750 WE HAVEN'T REALLY TALKED SINCE CASTOR LEFT. 160 00:07:57,750 --> 00:08:00,125 - DID YOU KNOW THEY FOUND A LOADED GUN IN HIS DRAWER? 161 00:08:00,125 --> 00:08:03,333 - JESUS! A LOADED GUN? 162 00:08:03,333 --> 00:08:05,709 - AND AN ETCH A SKETCH. REMEMBER ETCH A SKETCH? 163 00:08:05,709 --> 00:08:07,667 - SURE. 164 00:08:07,667 --> 00:08:11,417 WELL, AT LEAST YOU CAN'T KILL SOMEONE WITH AN ETCH A SKETCH. 165 00:08:11,417 --> 00:08:12,917 - YOU PROBABLY CAN. 166 00:08:12,917 --> 00:08:15,125 - MM. 167 00:08:15,125 --> 00:08:18,667 ANYWAY, I WANTED TO TALK ABOUT THE JOB. 168 00:08:18,667 --> 00:08:20,625 I SHOULD NEVER HAVE TURNED IT DOWN. 169 00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:22,792 I'VE REGRETTED IT EVER SINCE. 170 00:08:22,792 --> 00:08:24,125 - I'LL BET. [chuckles] 171 00:08:24,125 --> 00:08:25,667 - [chuckles] 172 00:08:25,667 --> 00:08:29,166 WELL, I HOPE NOW YOU'LL RECONSIDER ME. 173 00:08:29,166 --> 00:08:30,375 - OKAY. 174 00:08:30,375 --> 00:08:32,333 - I THINK WE NEED SOMEONE STRONG. 175 00:08:32,333 --> 00:08:35,166 SOMEONE WITH ENERGY, WITH EXPERIENCE. 176 00:08:35,166 --> 00:08:36,667 - NO QUESTION. - ALSO, 177 00:08:36,667 --> 00:08:39,834 THIS NETWORK HAS NEVER HAD A WOMAN IN THAT JOB. 178 00:08:39,834 --> 00:08:41,625 DON'T YOU THINK IT WOULD-- 179 00:08:41,625 --> 00:08:43,500 - WHAT ABOUT HELEN BASCH? 180 00:08:43,500 --> 00:08:45,208 - UH, WOW. 181 00:08:45,208 --> 00:08:47,500 HELEN'S GREAT, OBVIOUSLY. 182 00:08:47,500 --> 00:08:49,333 BUT I WAS THINKING-- 183 00:08:49,333 --> 00:08:50,250 - NO, I KNOW, YOU WERE SAYING YOU. 184 00:08:50,250 --> 00:08:51,500 BUT HELEN BASCH, COME ON. 185 00:08:51,500 --> 00:08:53,500 SHE'S GOT A HELL OF A TRACK RECORD. 186 00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:55,000 - WELL, SURE. 187 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:57,458 - WE NEED SOMEONE WHO CAN TURN THIS MESS AROUND. 188 00:08:57,458 --> 00:08:59,667 SHE'S DONE IT BEFORE. 189 00:08:59,667 --> 00:09:02,000 - NO, TOTALLY. IT'S A GREAT IDEA. 190 00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:03,041 - I KNOW. 191 00:09:03,041 --> 00:09:04,500 - I JUST, UH-- 192 00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:07,417 I'D BE SHOCKED IF WE COULD GET HER. 193 00:09:07,417 --> 00:09:09,834 I MEAN, WHY WOULD HELEN BASCH WANT TO LEAVE-- 194 00:09:09,834 --> 00:09:13,125 - 'CAUSE I'LL THROW A SHITLOAD OF MONEY AT HER. 195 00:09:13,125 --> 00:09:15,041 - THAT SHOULD DO IT. 196 00:09:15,041 --> 00:09:17,667 - HELEN BASCH. 197 00:09:17,667 --> 00:09:19,166 I'M EXCITED. 198 00:09:19,166 --> 00:09:21,041 - ME TOO. 199 00:09:21,041 --> 00:09:22,208 LOVE IT. 200 00:09:22,208 --> 00:09:24,709 [chuckles] 201 00:09:24,709 --> 00:09:26,375 THE MINUTE HE SAID "HELEN BASCH," 202 00:09:26,375 --> 00:09:29,166 I KNEW, THAT'S IT, I'M DEAD. 203 00:09:29,166 --> 00:09:31,458 I MEAN, HELEN BASCH. 204 00:09:31,458 --> 00:09:34,667 TRUST ME, I AM OUT ON MY ASS. 205 00:09:34,667 --> 00:09:36,458 - WHICH IS LOOKING VERY FIRM, BY THE WAY. 206 00:09:36,458 --> 00:09:37,792 - DOES IT? - HMM. 207 00:09:37,792 --> 00:09:39,125 - ARE YOU JUST BEING NICE? 208 00:09:39,125 --> 00:09:40,834 - DOES THAT SOUND LIKE ME? 209 00:09:40,834 --> 00:09:41,917 - EH. 210 00:09:41,917 --> 00:09:43,083 YOU'LL SEE, 211 00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:44,417 IF SHE TAKES THE JOB, 212 00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:46,041 NO WAY SHE'S GONNA KEEP ME. 213 00:09:46,041 --> 00:09:48,291 - WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT CASTOR, 214 00:09:48,291 --> 00:09:50,083 AND LOOK HOW WELL THAT TURNED OUT. 215 00:09:50,083 --> 00:09:51,583 - YEAH, WELL, THIS IS DIFFERENT. 216 00:09:51,583 --> 00:09:54,250 - HOW SO? 217 00:09:54,250 --> 00:09:56,083 - OKAY, DON'T JUDGE ME. 218 00:09:56,083 --> 00:09:57,291 - [chuckling] OH! 219 00:09:57,291 --> 00:10:01,208 I THINK THAT SHIP SAILED LONG AGO. 220 00:10:01,208 --> 00:10:02,917 - WHEN I FIRST STARTED OUT, 221 00:10:02,917 --> 00:10:05,750 I WORKED IN DAYTIME DRAMA OVER AT ABC. 222 00:10:05,750 --> 00:10:08,875 - MM. - AND I, UM... 223 00:10:08,875 --> 00:10:11,834 I KIND OF HAD A THING WITH MY BOSS. 224 00:10:11,834 --> 00:10:14,041 - REALLY? YOUR BOSS? 225 00:10:14,041 --> 00:10:16,542 THAT'S SO UNEXPECTED AND OUT OF CHARACTER. 226 00:10:16,542 --> 00:10:19,875 - [mocking] MEH, MEH, MEH, MEH, MEH, MEH, MEH, MEH, MEH. 227 00:10:19,875 --> 00:10:22,750 - ALL RIGHT. 228 00:10:22,750 --> 00:10:25,041 SO YOU'RE HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH YOUR BOSS 229 00:10:25,041 --> 00:10:28,792 IN DAYTIME DRAMA, FITTINGLY. 230 00:10:28,792 --> 00:10:32,166 - THEN HIS STUPID WIFE FOUND OUT. 231 00:10:32,166 --> 00:10:33,709 - HIS STUPID WIFE BEING... 232 00:10:33,709 --> 00:10:35,709 - YOU GOT IT! - OH! 233 00:10:35,709 --> 00:10:37,625 - SHE WENT NUTS. 234 00:10:37,625 --> 00:10:39,625 MADE HIM BREAK UP WITH ME. 235 00:10:39,625 --> 00:10:41,083 MADE HIM FIRE ME. 236 00:10:41,083 --> 00:10:42,792 - SO NOT SO STUPID. 237 00:10:42,792 --> 00:10:46,041 - I SEE HER ALL THE TIME NOW AT INDUSTRY THINGS. 238 00:10:46,041 --> 00:10:48,083 - OOH, THAT SOUNDS LIKE FUN. 239 00:10:48,083 --> 00:10:50,625 - KNOW WHAT, IT'S ACTUALLY FINE. 240 00:10:50,625 --> 00:10:52,291 SHE ACTS LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED. 241 00:10:52,291 --> 00:10:55,000 BUT COME ON, I BROKE UP HER MARRIAGE. 242 00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:57,875 YOU THINK SHE'S GONNA WANT ME AS HER NUMBER TWO? 243 00:10:57,875 --> 00:11:01,291 - WELL, SHE HASN'T SAID YES YET. 244 00:11:01,291 --> 00:11:02,709 THERE'S STILL HOPE. 245 00:11:02,709 --> 00:11:04,875 - JUST IN CASE, I'VE ALREADY STARTED LOOKING. 246 00:11:04,875 --> 00:11:06,583 - REALLY? - YEAH! 247 00:11:06,583 --> 00:11:08,500 I GOTTA COVER MY ASS. 248 00:11:08,500 --> 00:11:10,500 YOU REALLY THINK IT LOOKS GOOD? 249 00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:12,166 - BY THE WAY, WHERE ARE WE? 250 00:11:12,166 --> 00:11:16,041 - YOU'LL SEE. 251 00:11:16,041 --> 00:11:18,792 - SO WHEN YOU'RE HAVING AN AFFAIR 252 00:11:18,792 --> 00:11:22,333 WITH THESE MARRIED MEN, IS THERE ANY SENSE OF-- 253 00:11:22,333 --> 00:11:23,250 - DANGER? 254 00:11:23,250 --> 00:11:24,667 - I WAS GONNA SAY REMORSE. 255 00:11:24,667 --> 00:11:27,250 - OH. 256 00:11:27,250 --> 00:11:30,792 ALL RIGHT, THIS IS IT. 257 00:11:31,917 --> 00:11:34,834 WHAT DO YOU THINK? 258 00:11:39,125 --> 00:11:41,959 - I HATE THIS CITY. - OKAY. 259 00:11:45,667 --> 00:11:49,000 [somber music] 260 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,834 - I SAW HIM, LIKE, TWO WEEKS AGO. 261 00:11:50,834 --> 00:11:53,083 WE HAD A TAX MEETING. 262 00:11:53,083 --> 00:11:55,208 HE SEEMED FINE. 263 00:11:55,208 --> 00:11:57,417 - THAT IS DEATH IN A NUTSHELL. 264 00:11:57,417 --> 00:11:59,291 - HMM. 265 00:11:59,291 --> 00:12:02,709 - HEARTBREAKING. 266 00:12:02,709 --> 00:12:06,291 - OH, I KNOW. 267 00:12:06,291 --> 00:12:08,125 SHITTY TURNOUT. 268 00:12:08,125 --> 00:12:09,166 - HM. 269 00:12:09,166 --> 00:12:10,291 - WHERE'S TIM ALLEN? 270 00:12:10,291 --> 00:12:11,542 WHERE'S PHYLICIA RASHAD? 271 00:12:11,542 --> 00:12:12,917 THEY WERE WITH HIM LONGER THAN ME. 272 00:12:12,917 --> 00:12:14,375 WHY AREN'T THEY HERE? 273 00:12:14,375 --> 00:12:16,291 - OBVIOUSLY, THEY'RE NOT AS FORGIVING AS YOU. 274 00:12:16,291 --> 00:12:18,083 - WHAT'S THAT MEAN? 275 00:12:18,083 --> 00:12:20,375 - SERIOUSLY, YOU DIDN'T SEE THE PAPER TODAY? 276 00:12:20,375 --> 00:12:21,291 - WHY, AM I IN IT? 277 00:12:21,291 --> 00:12:23,166 - UNFORTUNATELY. - WHAT? 278 00:12:23,166 --> 00:12:24,709 - THE FBI'S BEEN INVESTIGATING HIM 279 00:12:24,709 --> 00:12:27,333 FOR STEALING MONEY FROM HIS CLIENTS. 280 00:12:27,333 --> 00:12:29,041 - LARRY? 281 00:12:29,041 --> 00:12:31,166 - APPARENTLY DEMI LOVATO HAD HIM AUDITED. 282 00:12:31,166 --> 00:12:32,333 THAT'S HOW THEY FOUND OUT. 283 00:12:32,333 --> 00:12:34,250 - ARE YOU SHITTING ME? 284 00:12:34,250 --> 00:12:35,750 - WHY DO YOU THINK HE, UH... 285 00:12:35,750 --> 00:12:37,500 - JESUS CHRIST. 286 00:12:37,500 --> 00:12:38,959 - THAT'S WHY NOBODY'S HERE. 287 00:12:38,959 --> 00:12:42,458 FRANKLY, I'M SURPRISED ARLENE CAME. 288 00:12:42,458 --> 00:12:44,250 HOW MUCH DID YOU HAVE WITH HIM? 289 00:12:44,250 --> 00:12:46,417 - WHAT DO YOU MEAN, HOW MUCH? ALL OF IT. 290 00:12:46,417 --> 00:12:48,083 - OH, SHIT. 291 00:12:48,083 --> 00:12:50,166 MAYBE SOME OF IT'S LEFT. 292 00:12:50,166 --> 00:12:51,709 - SOME OF IT? 293 00:12:51,709 --> 00:12:53,417 - I'LL MAKE SOME CALLS AFTER, 294 00:12:53,417 --> 00:12:54,917 FIND OUT THE SPECIFICS. 295 00:12:54,917 --> 00:12:58,750 OR I'LL MAKE SOME CALLS NOW. 296 00:13:03,250 --> 00:13:04,834 - THIS IS CRAZY. 297 00:13:04,834 --> 00:13:07,083 HE USED TO SAY HE THOUGHT OF ME AS FAMILY. 298 00:13:07,083 --> 00:13:08,375 - HE ALSO WIPED OUT HIS SISTER ZOEY, 299 00:13:08,375 --> 00:13:10,417 AND SHE'S ACTUALLY FAMILY. 300 00:13:10,417 --> 00:13:12,375 - FUCK! 301 00:13:13,667 --> 00:13:15,750 HEY, DON'T YOU HAVE YOUR MONEY WITH HIM? 302 00:13:15,750 --> 00:13:19,125 - EH, I DUMPED LARRY SIX YEARS AGO. 303 00:13:19,125 --> 00:13:21,250 I JUST DIDN'T HAVE A GOOD FEELING. 304 00:13:21,250 --> 00:13:23,166 - THANKS FOR THE HEADS-UP. 305 00:13:23,166 --> 00:13:25,458 - WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN PROFESSIONAL. 306 00:13:25,458 --> 00:13:27,083 IS HE IN? 307 00:13:27,083 --> 00:13:29,750 SANFORD SHAMIRO. 308 00:13:29,750 --> 00:13:32,458 - MOTHERFUCKING SON OF A BITCH. 309 00:13:32,458 --> 00:13:33,875 - MAY HE REST IN PEACE. 310 00:13:33,875 --> 00:13:36,500 - WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON? 311 00:13:36,500 --> 00:13:41,458 - WE ARE ALL EXPERIENCING A RANGE OF EMOTIONS TODAY. 312 00:13:41,458 --> 00:13:47,291 SADNESS OVER THE LOSS OF SOMEONE SO GIFTED AND LOVING. 313 00:13:47,291 --> 00:13:51,291 CONFUSION OVER THE CHOICES THAT HE MADE. 314 00:13:51,291 --> 00:13:54,333 - ASK HIM ABOUT THE EQUITY ACCOUNT IN THE BOYS' NAMES. 315 00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:56,333 - HE WANTS TO KNOW ABOUT THE EQUITY ACCOUNT 316 00:13:56,333 --> 00:13:58,375 IN THE BOYS' NAMES. 317 00:13:58,375 --> 00:14:01,083 - REMIND ME. - AIDEN AND MICHAEL. 318 00:14:01,083 --> 00:14:04,458 - AIDEN AND MICHAEL. [rabbi continues in background] 319 00:14:04,458 --> 00:14:05,667 NO, THAT'S GONE TOO. 320 00:14:05,667 --> 00:14:07,417 - GOD DAMN IT. 321 00:14:07,417 --> 00:14:08,917 HOW ABOUT THE-- 322 00:14:08,917 --> 00:14:12,208 - I'M GONNA PUT YOU ON WITH HIM. 323 00:14:12,208 --> 00:14:15,208 - OKAY, THERE'S A FIXED INCOME MANAGEMENT ACCOUNT. 324 00:14:15,208 --> 00:14:18,041 I FORGET THE COMPANY, IT'S THREE LETTERS. 325 00:14:18,041 --> 00:14:20,041 YEAH, THAT'S IT. 326 00:14:20,041 --> 00:14:23,667 OH, COME ON. 327 00:14:23,667 --> 00:14:26,500 [somber music] 328 00:14:26,500 --> 00:14:34,625 ♪ ♪ 329 00:14:35,333 --> 00:14:37,625 WELL, IT'S GONE. 330 00:14:37,625 --> 00:14:40,250 JUST FUCKING GONE. 331 00:14:40,250 --> 00:14:41,375 - UNBELIEVABLE. 332 00:14:41,375 --> 00:14:43,834 - YOU HAD NO IDEA THE WHOLE TIME? 333 00:14:45,542 --> 00:14:47,417 RIGHT, OBVIOUSLY. SORRY. 334 00:14:47,417 --> 00:14:49,000 - IT'S HEARTBREAKING. 335 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:51,375 YOU TRUSTED HIM ALL THOSE YEARS. 336 00:14:51,375 --> 00:14:54,125 - UP UNTIL ABOUT 11:30 TODAY. 337 00:14:54,125 --> 00:14:57,583 - YOU MUST FEEL SO BETRAYED. 338 00:14:57,583 --> 00:14:58,750 - I DON'T KNOW WHAT I FEEL. 339 00:14:58,750 --> 00:15:02,333 IT'S LIKE, I DON'T KNOW... 340 00:15:02,333 --> 00:15:03,917 I'VE NEVER BEEN RAPED. 341 00:15:03,917 --> 00:15:06,750 - WELL, DON'T LOOK AT ME. I'VE NEVER BEEN RAPED. 342 00:15:09,291 --> 00:15:10,709 - WHAT? 343 00:15:10,709 --> 00:15:14,166 - I DON'T KNOW... BOARDING SCHOOL? 344 00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,583 - UGH. 345 00:15:19,583 --> 00:15:23,583 IT'S LIKE THE BOTTOM JUST DROPPED OUT. 346 00:15:23,583 --> 00:15:28,709 LIKE MY WHOLE LIFE AFTER TODAY IS... 347 00:15:31,291 --> 00:15:32,792 [sighs] 348 00:15:32,792 --> 00:15:35,041 I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO. 349 00:15:36,917 --> 00:15:38,750 - I KNOW IT'S A MEANINGLESS CLICHE, 350 00:15:38,750 --> 00:15:41,667 BUT IT IS JUST MONEY. 351 00:15:41,667 --> 00:15:44,750 YOU STILL HAVE YOUR HEALTH, YOUR CHILDREN. 352 00:15:44,750 --> 00:15:46,542 - NO, YOU'RE RIGHT. 353 00:15:46,542 --> 00:15:48,542 IT'S A MEANINGLESS CLICHE. 354 00:15:52,083 --> 00:15:54,542 HOW DID THIS FUCKING HAPPEN? 355 00:15:54,542 --> 00:15:55,792 I DON'T DESERVE THIS. 356 00:15:55,792 --> 00:15:57,875 I'M A GOOD PERSON. 357 00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:04,166 - I DON'T KNOW THAT IT'S ABOUT GOOD OR BAD PER SE. 358 00:16:04,166 --> 00:16:06,834 - YOU GO ALONG THINKING EVERYTHING'S GREAT. 359 00:16:06,834 --> 00:16:10,291 I MEAN, NOT THE STUPID SHOW. 360 00:16:10,291 --> 00:16:11,709 - SURE. - RIGHT. 361 00:16:11,709 --> 00:16:13,125 - THEN YOU WAKE UP ONE DAY, 362 00:16:13,125 --> 00:16:16,333 AND HALF YOUR MONEY'S GONE. JUST--JUST GONE. 363 00:16:16,333 --> 00:16:18,417 - WAIT, I'M SORRY. SAY WHAT? 364 00:16:18,417 --> 00:16:19,333 - WHAT? 365 00:16:19,333 --> 00:16:20,458 - YOU SAID HALF? 366 00:16:20,458 --> 00:16:21,500 HALF YOUR MONEY'S GONE? 367 00:16:21,500 --> 00:16:22,875 - YEAH. 368 00:16:22,875 --> 00:16:24,542 - OH. 369 00:16:24,542 --> 00:16:27,208 YOU MADE IT SOUND LIKE HE TOOK EVERYTHING. 370 00:16:27,208 --> 00:16:28,625 DIDN'T YOU THINK? - I DID, YEAH. 371 00:16:28,625 --> 00:16:31,750 - WELL, IF IT'S NOT EVERYTHING... 372 00:16:31,750 --> 00:16:35,792 - HE STOLE $32 MILLION FROM ME. 373 00:16:35,792 --> 00:16:37,667 - IT'S INSANE. UNBELIEVABLE. 374 00:16:37,667 --> 00:16:40,458 - NO, THAT'S A RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF MONEY, OF COURSE. 375 00:16:40,458 --> 00:16:44,542 BUT YOU STILL HAVE... 376 00:16:44,542 --> 00:16:48,125 - UH, A LITTLE OVER 31. 377 00:16:50,458 --> 00:16:51,959 WHAT? 378 00:16:51,959 --> 00:16:53,542 - NOTHING. 379 00:16:53,542 --> 00:16:55,083 - WHAT? - UM... 380 00:16:55,083 --> 00:16:57,500 I DON'T WANT TO DIMINISH WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH 381 00:16:57,500 --> 00:16:58,333 IN ANY WAY... 382 00:16:58,333 --> 00:16:59,750 - BUT? 383 00:16:59,750 --> 00:17:03,291 - BUT IT DOES SEEM SLIGHTLY LESS... 384 00:17:03,291 --> 00:17:04,667 DIRE. 385 00:17:04,667 --> 00:17:07,375 - I LOST $32 MILLION. 386 00:17:07,375 --> 00:17:08,875 - ABSOLUTELY. 387 00:17:08,875 --> 00:17:11,458 BUT THE GOOD NEWS IS YOU STILL HAVE 31. 388 00:17:11,458 --> 00:17:14,208 - BUT THE BAD NEWS IS I LOST 32. 389 00:17:14,208 --> 00:17:15,291 - RIGHT, I GET IT. 390 00:17:15,291 --> 00:17:16,542 - I DON'T THINK YOU DO. 391 00:17:16,542 --> 00:17:18,000 TO BE CLEAR, 392 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:25,041 I LOST 32 MILLION FUCKING DOLLARS. 393 00:17:25,041 --> 00:17:26,625 - YEAH, NO, THAT'S AN UNBELIEVABLE LOT. 394 00:17:26,625 --> 00:17:28,333 - I MEAN, IT'S INCONCEIVABLE JUST-- 395 00:17:36,583 --> 00:17:38,458 - BUT YOU STILL HAVE 31. 396 00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:39,542 - I SWEAR TO GOD-- 397 00:17:39,542 --> 00:17:40,542 - LISTEN TO ME, 398 00:17:40,542 --> 00:17:41,709 YOU HAVE SUFFERED A TERRIBLE, 399 00:17:41,709 --> 00:17:43,542 TERRIBLE LOSS. 400 00:17:43,542 --> 00:17:44,834 - YOU THINK? 401 00:17:44,834 --> 00:17:46,792 - BUT YOU WILL BE ALL RIGHT. 402 00:17:46,792 --> 00:17:48,500 - [scoffs] - YOU WILL! 403 00:17:48,500 --> 00:17:49,834 YOU CAN HAVE A VERY NICE LIFE, 404 00:17:49,834 --> 00:17:55,750 EVEN WITH AS LITTLE AS $31 MILLION. 405 00:17:55,750 --> 00:17:57,291 - I--I DON'T SEE HOW. 406 00:17:57,291 --> 00:17:59,041 - LET'S SAY YOU NEVER MAKE ANOTHER DIME. 407 00:17:59,041 --> 00:18:03,083 YOU CAN STILL LIVE ON A MILLION DOLLARS A YEAR. 408 00:18:03,083 --> 00:18:05,667 - NO, YOU COULD LIVE ON A MILLION DOLLARS A YEAR. 409 00:18:05,667 --> 00:18:06,917 - I'M SURE I COULD. 410 00:18:06,917 --> 00:18:09,417 - SO A MILLION A YEAR. 411 00:18:09,417 --> 00:18:14,583 THAT MEANS I'D HAVE TO DIE BEFORE I'M 80. 412 00:18:14,583 --> 00:18:15,750 - I WOULDN'T WORRY ABOUT THAT. 413 00:18:15,750 --> 00:18:16,667 [knock at door] 414 00:18:16,667 --> 00:18:18,083 - YEAH? WHAT? 415 00:18:18,083 --> 00:18:20,000 - MATT, WE'RE READY TO SHOOT. 416 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,917 - FINE, LET'S DO THIS FUCKING THING. 417 00:18:22,917 --> 00:18:25,500 - ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE UP FOR THIS? 418 00:18:25,500 --> 00:18:27,041 - WHY NOT? 419 00:18:27,041 --> 00:18:28,875 - I'D SAY YOU'RE SIGNIFICANTLY DRUNK. 420 00:18:28,875 --> 00:18:31,542 - PSSH, YOU'VE NEVER SEEN ME DRUNK. 421 00:18:31,542 --> 00:18:33,750 - YOU VOMITED ON ME. 422 00:18:33,750 --> 00:18:35,250 - I DON'T RECALL THAT. 423 00:18:42,875 --> 00:18:44,709 - HOW ARE WE ONLY NOW 424 00:18:44,709 --> 00:18:47,375 FINDING OUT PEOPLE THINK THIS IS RACIST? 425 00:18:47,375 --> 00:18:50,208 RESEARCH HAS HAD THIS TITLE FOR SIX MONTHS. 426 00:18:50,208 --> 00:18:52,458 - I STILL THINK IT'S CLEVER. 427 00:18:52,458 --> 00:18:54,625 - APPARENTLY AMERICA DISAGREES WITH YOU. 428 00:18:54,625 --> 00:18:56,125 - ONLY 46%. 429 00:18:56,125 --> 00:18:59,125 - I'M SORRY, WHY IS IT RACIST? 430 00:18:59,125 --> 00:19:01,166 I MEAN, IT'S NOT LIKE WE CALLED IT "WHITE AND WONG." 431 00:19:01,166 --> 00:19:03,625 - I STILL LIKE THAT ONE. 432 00:19:03,625 --> 00:19:06,083 MAYBE I DON'T KNOW WHAT RACIST IS. 433 00:19:06,083 --> 00:19:08,875 - OH, MY GOD, HAVE YOU GUYS HEARD? 434 00:19:08,875 --> 00:19:11,125 - WHERE DID YOU RUN FROM? 435 00:19:11,125 --> 00:19:13,500 - MY OFFICE. IT'S NEWS. I'M BREATHLESS. 436 00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:16,792 WE JUST HIRED HELEN BASCH. 437 00:19:16,792 --> 00:19:18,917 - DEFINITELY? - MM-HMM. 438 00:19:18,917 --> 00:19:21,000 - YEAH, IT SAYS STARTING NEXT WEEK. 439 00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:23,667 - "A MAJOR GET FOR THE FAILING NETWORK." 440 00:19:23,667 --> 00:19:25,667 - OH, MY GOD, HELEN BASCH. 441 00:19:25,667 --> 00:19:27,834 - SHE'S SUPPOSED TO BE FANTASTIC. 442 00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:30,792 [overlapping chatter] 443 00:19:36,625 --> 00:19:38,709 - SERIOUSLY? - WHAT? 444 00:19:38,709 --> 00:19:40,792 - YOU'RE NOT REALLY BRINGING THAT ONTO THE STAGE? 445 00:19:40,792 --> 00:19:42,000 - WHY NOT? 446 00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:44,166 - YOU REEK OF PROFESSIONALISM. 447 00:19:44,166 --> 00:19:45,709 - 32 MILLION! 448 00:19:48,709 --> 00:19:50,000 - SO I TOOK HIM TO THE VET, 449 00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:51,959 AND, YOU KNOW, THEY SAID IT'S CANCER. 450 00:19:51,959 --> 00:19:55,625 SO $3,000 LATER, YOU KNOW, HE'S STILL DYING, SO... 451 00:19:55,625 --> 00:19:57,083 - YEAH. 452 00:19:57,083 --> 00:19:59,000 - AT FIRST THEY THINK IT'S FELINE AIDS, 453 00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:00,542 WHICH, YOU KNOW, WOULD HAVE BEEN A BLESSING. 454 00:20:00,542 --> 00:20:02,667 BUT IT'S CANCER, SO THAT'S IT. 455 00:20:02,667 --> 00:20:03,709 - REHEARSAL UP! 456 00:20:03,709 --> 00:20:07,959 - LISTEN, MATT IS A LITTLE... 457 00:20:07,959 --> 00:20:09,792 AND I SUSPECT HE'S NOT GONNA GET ANY LESS SO. 458 00:20:09,792 --> 00:20:11,208 - NO. 459 00:20:11,208 --> 00:20:12,917 - SO WE SHOULD PROBABLY SKIP THE REHEARSAL 460 00:20:12,917 --> 00:20:14,667 AND SHOOT THIS AS SOON AS WE CAN. 461 00:20:14,667 --> 00:20:16,875 - OKAY, JUST GIVE US A FEW MINUTES TO FINISH LIGHTING, 462 00:20:16,875 --> 00:20:19,625 OKAY? [clattering] 463 00:20:19,625 --> 00:20:21,667 - MY BAD. 464 00:20:24,709 --> 00:20:27,709 - ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? - WHAT? 465 00:20:27,709 --> 00:20:29,000 - WE'RE REALLY GONNA SHOOT WITH HIM LIKE THIS? 466 00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:31,166 - HE'LL BE FINE. 467 00:20:31,166 --> 00:20:33,208 - OH, YEAH? 468 00:20:33,208 --> 00:20:34,875 HAVE YOU SMELLED HIS BIG GULP? 469 00:20:34,875 --> 00:20:36,625 IT'S LIKE 30 OUNCES OF REHAB. 470 00:20:36,625 --> 00:20:40,208 - THERE ARE EXTENUATING CIRCUMSTANCES. 471 00:20:40,208 --> 00:20:42,834 - LOOK, I GET THAT HE LOST ALL HIS MONEY. 472 00:20:42,834 --> 00:20:44,083 - HALF. 473 00:20:44,083 --> 00:20:45,041 - HALF? 474 00:20:45,041 --> 00:20:46,500 - THANK YOU. 475 00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:48,041 - BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, THERE'S STILL NO EXCUSE. 476 00:20:48,041 --> 00:20:49,875 YOU DON'T SHOW UP FOR WORK LIKE THIS. 477 00:20:49,875 --> 00:20:55,250 I HAVE BEEN IN THIS BUSINESS FOR ALMOST FOURT--FOREVER. 478 00:20:55,250 --> 00:20:57,583 AND I HAVE NEVER SEEN THIS KIND OF BEHAVIOR. 479 00:20:57,583 --> 00:20:58,959 I'LL TELL YOU, 480 00:20:58,959 --> 00:21:00,750 IF AN ACTOR SHOWED UP LIKE THIS ON KELLY GIRL... 481 00:21:00,750 --> 00:21:01,917 - ON WHAT? 482 00:21:01,917 --> 00:21:03,667 - DOES NO ONE REMEMBER MY FUCKING SHOW? 483 00:21:03,667 --> 00:21:06,083 - I DO. 484 00:21:07,333 --> 00:21:09,125 - [sighs] 485 00:21:09,125 --> 00:21:12,166 LOOK, I REALIZE NOBODY'S EVER GONNA SEE THESE SHOWS, 486 00:21:12,166 --> 00:21:14,709 BUT CAN WE AT LEAST PRETEND THIS MATTERS. 487 00:21:14,709 --> 00:21:16,625 I HAD TO GIVE UP A PILOT FOR THIS SHIT. 488 00:21:16,625 --> 00:21:18,500 THE LEAST HE CAN DO IS SET AN EXAMPLE. 489 00:21:18,500 --> 00:21:19,917 IT'S CALLED A FUCKING WORK ETHIC. 490 00:21:19,917 --> 00:21:21,083 - WHAT'S GOING ON? 491 00:21:21,083 --> 00:21:22,750 - HI, BOO. 492 00:21:22,750 --> 00:21:24,542 WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT YOU. 493 00:21:24,542 --> 00:21:26,750 I WAS SAYING IN ALL THE YEARS I'VE BEEN DOING THIS, 494 00:21:26,750 --> 00:21:29,291 I'VE NEVER SEEN A WORK ETHIC LIKE YOURS. 495 00:21:29,291 --> 00:21:31,000 - [belches] 496 00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:33,834 - ANYWAY, SORRY ABOUT THE LARRY PENZEL THING. 497 00:21:33,834 --> 00:21:34,792 JESUS. 498 00:21:34,792 --> 00:21:36,458 - UGH, TELL ME. 499 00:21:36,458 --> 00:21:38,458 - YOU KNOW, LARRY WAS MY MONEY GUY FOR YEARS. 500 00:21:38,458 --> 00:21:39,458 - WAS? 501 00:21:39,458 --> 00:21:41,125 - OH, I GOT OUT A WHILE AGO. 502 00:21:41,125 --> 00:21:43,625 I DON'T KNOW, I JUST HAD A FEELING. 503 00:21:43,625 --> 00:21:45,208 - GOD DAMN IT! 504 00:21:45,208 --> 00:21:48,333 AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO DIDN'T HAVE A FEELING? 505 00:21:48,333 --> 00:21:50,917 - JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. 506 00:21:50,917 --> 00:21:52,750 WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? 507 00:21:52,750 --> 00:21:55,291 I GOT THREE GODDAMN ALIMONIES TO PAY. 508 00:21:55,291 --> 00:21:57,834 THIS IS WORSE THAN WHEN I HAD BALL CANCER. 509 00:21:57,834 --> 00:21:59,542 - WELL, IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL ANY BETTER, 510 00:21:59,542 --> 00:22:02,458 MATT LEBLANC LOST 32 MILLION. 511 00:22:03,875 --> 00:22:05,875 - OH. 512 00:22:05,875 --> 00:22:08,250 HUH. 513 00:22:12,959 --> 00:22:15,166 - MAY I JUST SAY... - HMM? 514 00:22:15,166 --> 00:22:18,125 - EATING YOUR FEELINGS IS NOT THE ANSWER. 515 00:22:18,125 --> 00:22:21,000 - OH, I FINISHED MY FEELINGS A LONG TIME AGO. 516 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:22,875 I'M EATING YOUR FEELINGS NOW. 517 00:22:22,875 --> 00:22:25,709 - LOOK, UM, I KNOW YOU DON'T WANNA HEAR THIS, 518 00:22:25,709 --> 00:22:28,625 BUT YOU ARE STILL A VERY WEALTHY MAN. 519 00:22:28,625 --> 00:22:30,208 - MM, I DON'T WANNA HEAR IT. 520 00:22:30,208 --> 00:22:32,208 - I'M SORRY, BUT YOU STILL HAVE THIRTY-- 521 00:22:32,208 --> 00:22:34,333 - DON'T SAY 31. DON'T SAY 31. 522 00:22:34,333 --> 00:22:36,667 - LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING. 523 00:22:36,667 --> 00:22:39,083 MM. 524 00:22:39,083 --> 00:22:42,458 - HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED THE OPTION OF SMALLER BITES? 525 00:22:44,834 --> 00:22:46,333 - MM. 526 00:22:51,959 --> 00:22:53,166 LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION. 527 00:22:53,166 --> 00:22:54,917 WHAT IF YOU LOST HALF YOUR MONEY? 528 00:22:54,917 --> 00:22:56,333 - IT'S TOTALLY DIFFERENT. 529 00:22:56,333 --> 00:22:58,333 - WHY? HOW MUCH DO YOU GUYS HAVE? 530 00:22:58,333 --> 00:23:00,750 [both laugh] - I'D RATHER NOT SAY. 531 00:23:00,750 --> 00:23:03,083 - TOLD YOU HOW MUCH I HAVE. COME ON, JUST BALLPARK. 532 00:23:03,083 --> 00:23:04,250 - NO. - IT'S IN POUNDS. 533 00:23:04,250 --> 00:23:06,208 I WON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT MEANS. 534 00:23:06,208 --> 00:23:07,542 - LET'S JUST SAY IT'S A LOT LESS THAN 31 MILLION. 535 00:23:07,542 --> 00:23:09,166 - WELL, I FIGURED THAT. 536 00:23:09,166 --> 00:23:11,166 SO, LIKE, WHAT, 10? 537 00:23:11,166 --> 00:23:12,458 - 10? NO! 538 00:23:12,458 --> 00:23:15,041 - 5? - IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! 539 00:23:15,041 --> 00:23:16,375 - I'M TALKING COMBINED. 540 00:23:16,375 --> 00:23:18,959 THE TWO OF YOU COMBINED HAVE LESS THAN 5? 541 00:23:18,959 --> 00:23:21,083 - WE'RE NOT TELLING YOU. 542 00:23:21,083 --> 00:23:23,709 - OKAY, STOP ME WHEN I'M CLOSE. 4. 543 00:23:23,709 --> 00:23:25,250 3? 544 00:23:25,250 --> 00:23:27,208 2? - STOP. 545 00:23:27,208 --> 00:23:28,959 - OKAY, SO YOU HAVE 2. 546 00:23:28,959 --> 00:23:30,208 - NO, JUST STOP. 547 00:23:30,208 --> 00:23:32,041 - COME ON, YOU GOTTA HAVE AT LEAST 2. 548 00:23:32,041 --> 00:23:32,959 YOU HAD A HIT SHOW. 549 00:23:32,959 --> 00:23:34,709 - IN ENGLAND. 550 00:23:34,709 --> 00:23:36,625 - IT'S STILL A COUNTRY. 551 00:23:36,625 --> 00:23:38,417 CHRIST, LESS THAN 2? 552 00:23:38,417 --> 00:23:40,166 1? 553 00:23:40,166 --> 00:23:42,834 OH, MY GOD, LESS THAN 1? 554 00:23:42,834 --> 00:23:44,834 FUCK. 555 00:23:44,834 --> 00:23:48,458 DO YOU NEED MONEY? - NO, WE DON'T NEED MONEY. 556 00:23:48,458 --> 00:23:49,834 - I AM VERY CONCERNED FOR YOU. 557 00:23:49,834 --> 00:23:51,959 - THANK YOU. WE'RE FINE. 558 00:23:51,959 --> 00:23:53,750 - YOU'RE NOT FINE. 559 00:23:53,750 --> 00:23:55,667 YOU GOT NO MONEY. 560 00:23:55,667 --> 00:23:57,917 YOU NEED SECURITY. 561 00:23:57,917 --> 00:23:59,583 YOU'RE NOT THAT YOUNG. 562 00:23:59,583 --> 00:24:01,083 - YOUNGER THAN YOU. 563 00:24:01,083 --> 00:24:03,083 - REALLY? HOW OLD ARE YOU? 564 00:24:03,083 --> 00:24:04,792 - NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. 565 00:24:04,792 --> 00:24:06,083 - MORE THAN 40? 566 00:24:06,083 --> 00:24:07,250 - ALL RIGHT, YOU'RE DRUNK, 567 00:24:07,250 --> 00:24:08,583 AND THIS CONVERSATION IS OVER. 568 00:24:08,583 --> 00:24:10,500 - YES, I AM, AND, NO, IT'S NOT. 569 00:24:10,500 --> 00:24:12,750 YOU--YOU GOT NO SAVINGS. 570 00:24:12,750 --> 00:24:16,375 YOU WANT THE LIGHTS TO STILL GO ON WHEN YOU'RE 70? 571 00:24:16,375 --> 00:24:17,500 YOU SHOULD BE WORRIED. 572 00:24:17,500 --> 00:24:19,709 VERY WORRIED. 573 00:24:19,709 --> 00:24:20,792 - WHAT? 574 00:24:20,792 --> 00:24:22,208 - SHOULD WE BE WORRIED? 575 00:24:22,208 --> 00:24:23,667 - NO! 576 00:24:23,667 --> 00:24:25,625 YOU'RE TAKING FINANCIAL ADVICE FROM A MAN 577 00:24:25,625 --> 00:24:27,709 WHO IS LITERALLY SLOSHING WHILE HE WALKS. 578 00:24:27,709 --> 00:24:29,291 - STILL... 579 00:24:29,291 --> 00:24:31,667 - SWEETHEART, 31 MILLION ISN'T ENOUGH FOR HIM. 580 00:24:31,667 --> 00:24:34,125 - YOU KNOW WHAT ISN'T ENOUGH? LESS THAN 1. 581 00:24:34,125 --> 00:24:35,750 - MAYBE WE SHOULD THINK ABOUT DOING THE OTHER THING. 582 00:24:35,750 --> 00:24:38,291 - DARLING, DON'T-- - WHAT OTHER THING? 583 00:24:38,291 --> 00:24:39,792 - THAT SCRIPT EVERYONE WANTS. 584 00:24:39,792 --> 00:24:41,458 - HOW IS THAT EVEN A QUESTION? 585 00:24:41,458 --> 00:24:42,667 - WILL YOU PLEASE STAY OUT OF THIS? 586 00:24:42,667 --> 00:24:44,125 - NO, DO IT. CASH IN. 587 00:24:44,125 --> 00:24:45,583 - STOP FOLLOWING US. 588 00:24:45,583 --> 00:24:47,458 - YOU THINK IT'S ALWAYS GONNA BE LIKE THIS? 589 00:24:47,458 --> 00:24:49,458 OH, SURE, TELEVISION WRITERS. 590 00:24:49,458 --> 00:24:52,166 WHEN YOU GET OLD, THAT'S WHEN THE BIG BUCKS START ROLLING IN. 591 00:24:52,166 --> 00:24:53,458 - DON'T LET HIM DO THIS. 592 00:24:53,458 --> 00:24:55,291 WE HAVE NEVER WORRIED ABOUT MONEY. 593 00:24:55,291 --> 00:24:56,792 - WHICH IS WHY YOU DON'T HAVE ANY. 594 00:24:56,792 --> 00:24:57,834 - ARE WE BEING STUPID? 595 00:24:57,834 --> 00:24:59,417 - YES! - NO! 596 00:24:59,417 --> 00:25:01,208 NO MONEY IS WORTH GOING THROUGH THIS AGAIN. 597 00:25:01,208 --> 00:25:02,333 - I DON'T KNOW. 598 00:25:02,333 --> 00:25:04,250 - SLOW DOWN! 599 00:25:04,250 --> 00:25:06,291 - WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE? 600 00:25:06,291 --> 00:25:08,333 - ALL RIGHT, I'LL SAY ONE THING, 601 00:25:08,333 --> 00:25:10,375 AND THEN I'LL DROP IT. 602 00:25:10,375 --> 00:25:11,500 - I BET YOU DON'T. 603 00:25:11,500 --> 00:25:12,542 - HI, MATT. 604 00:25:12,542 --> 00:25:14,709 - YOU--UH--MM-- 605 00:25:14,709 --> 00:25:17,375 LET'S SAY YOU NEVER SELL ANOTHER SHOW. 606 00:25:17,375 --> 00:25:20,333 YOU DON'T MAKE ANY MORE AFTER THIS. 607 00:25:20,333 --> 00:25:21,667 HOW YOU GONNA LIVE? 608 00:25:21,667 --> 00:25:23,709 WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? 609 00:25:23,709 --> 00:25:25,834 GO HOME, OPEN A LITTLE SHOP... 610 00:25:25,834 --> 00:25:27,333 SELLING JOKES? 611 00:25:27,333 --> 00:25:29,458 [English accent] JOKES. I'VE GOT JOKES. 612 00:25:29,458 --> 00:25:32,333 JOKE, SIR? PENNY FOR A JOKE. 613 00:25:32,333 --> 00:25:33,333 - BLOODY HELL! 614 00:25:33,333 --> 00:25:34,667 - I'M SERIOUS. 615 00:25:34,667 --> 00:25:38,291 MY GRANDFATHER WAS STILL DRIVING A LAUNDRY TRUCK 616 00:25:38,291 --> 00:25:41,458 TWO DAYS BEFORE HIS FUNERAL. 617 00:25:41,458 --> 00:25:44,041 YOU WANNA RETIRE SOMEDAY? 618 00:25:44,041 --> 00:25:45,750 YOU GOTTA MAKE YOUR MONEY NOW. 619 00:25:45,750 --> 00:25:49,750 - OKAY, MONEY, FINE. BUT NOT HERE. 620 00:25:49,750 --> 00:25:51,834 - HERE IS WHERE YOU MAKE THE MONEY. 621 00:25:51,834 --> 00:25:53,834 WHAT'S THE MATTER? 622 00:25:53,834 --> 00:25:54,959 IT WAS TOO HARD? 623 00:25:54,959 --> 00:25:56,542 THEY CHANGED YOUR LITTLE SHOW? 624 00:25:56,542 --> 00:25:58,625 THEY DON'T RESPECT YOUR TALENT? 625 00:25:58,625 --> 00:26:01,000 THAT'S WHY THEY PAY YOU SO MUCH! 626 00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:03,458 - STOP TALKING. OOH--AHH! 627 00:26:03,458 --> 00:26:05,291 DID YOU JUST LICK ME? HE LICKED ME! 628 00:26:05,291 --> 00:26:07,083 - CALM DOWN. - YOU'RE A MONSTER! 629 00:26:07,083 --> 00:26:11,834 - YEAH, WELL, SOMETIMES THE MONSTER IS RIGHT. 630 00:26:13,166 --> 00:26:15,041 DON'T BE STUPID. 631 00:26:16,375 --> 00:26:17,709 CALL YOUR AGENT. 632 00:26:17,709 --> 00:26:20,166 SELL YOUR SHOW. MAKE THE MONEY. 633 00:26:27,208 --> 00:26:28,875 - I'M SORRY. 634 00:26:30,417 --> 00:26:32,792 THE MONSTER IS RIGHT. 635 00:26:35,875 --> 00:26:37,583 - SEAN LINCOLN ON ONE. 636 00:26:37,583 --> 00:26:40,583 - HI, HONEY. 637 00:26:40,583 --> 00:26:43,125 - IT'S...GO. 638 00:26:43,125 --> 00:26:45,959 - OH, MY GOD! 639 00:26:45,959 --> 00:26:50,041 - I MADE UP THE PART ABOUT MY GRANDFATHER. 640 00:26:51,792 --> 00:26:54,667 [upbeat music] 641 00:26:54,667 --> 00:27:02,625 ♪ ♪ 42550

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