Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,256 --> 00:00:05,919
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
2
00:00:05,993 --> 00:00:09,190
♪ In living color♪
3
00:00:09,263 --> 00:00:11,823
- ♪ In living color♪- ♪ You know what I'm sayin'♪
4
00:00:11,899 --> 00:00:14,493
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
5
00:00:14,569 --> 00:00:16,560
♪ In living color♪
6
00:00:19,273 --> 00:00:21,332
♪ In living color♪
7
00:00:21,409 --> 00:00:23,639
♪ You can walk on the moonFloat like a balloon ♪
8
00:00:23,711 --> 00:00:26,111
♪ It's never too lateand it's never too soon ♪
9
00:00:26,180 --> 00:00:28,171
♪ Take it from meIt's a'ight to be ♪
10
00:00:28,249 --> 00:00:30,217
♪ In living color♪
11
00:00:30,284 --> 00:00:32,912
♪ How would you feel knowingprejudice was obsolete ♪
12
00:00:32,987 --> 00:00:35,217
♪ And all mankind dancedto the exact beat ♪
13
00:00:35,289 --> 00:00:37,382
♪ And at night it was safeto walk down the street ♪
14
00:00:37,458 --> 00:00:41,451
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
15
00:00:41,529 --> 00:00:44,157
♪ In living color♪
16
00:00:44,231 --> 00:00:45,664
♪ In living color♪
17
00:00:45,733 --> 00:00:49,169
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
18
00:00:49,236 --> 00:00:51,500
♪ In living color♪
19
00:00:51,572 --> 00:00:54,040
♪ In living color♪
20
00:00:54,108 --> 00:00:56,508
♪ Everybody hereis equally kind ♪
21
00:00:56,577 --> 00:00:58,807
♪ In living color♪
22
00:00:58,879 --> 00:01:01,507
♪ What's mine is yoursand what's yours is mine ♪
23
00:01:01,582 --> 00:01:03,015
♪ In living color♪
24
00:01:03,084 --> 00:01:05,052
♪ How would you feel knowingeverybody was your friend ♪
25
00:01:05,119 --> 00:01:07,679
♪ From thin to thickand through thick and thin ♪
26
00:01:07,755 --> 00:01:10,747
♪ And egotistical tripswas put to an end ♪
27
00:01:10,825 --> 00:01:13,817
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
28
00:01:13,894 --> 00:01:16,522
♪ In living color♪
29
00:01:16,597 --> 00:01:18,497
♪ In living color♪
30
00:01:18,566 --> 00:01:20,659
♪ You can walk on the moonFloat like a balloon ♪
31
00:01:20,735 --> 00:01:22,703
♪ It's never too lateand it's never too soon ♪
32
00:01:22,770 --> 00:01:25,102
♪ Take it from meIt's a'ight to be ♪
33
00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:26,799
♪ In living color♪
34
00:01:26,874 --> 00:01:29,069
♪ How would you feel knowingprejudice was obsolete ♪
35
00:01:29,143 --> 00:01:31,202
♪ And all mankind dancedto the exact beat ♪
36
00:01:31,278 --> 00:01:34,577
♪ And at night it was safeto walk down the street ♪
37
00:01:34,649 --> 00:01:38,551
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
38
00:01:38,619 --> 00:01:40,314
♪ In living color♪♪
39
00:01:40,388 --> 00:01:43,551
Ladies and gentlemen,
Keenen Ivory Wayans.
40
00:01:43,624 --> 00:01:46,650
[Applause, Cheering]
41
00:01:46,727 --> 00:01:49,457
[Audience Whooping]
42
00:01:52,366 --> 00:01:54,630
Thank you.
43
00:01:58,839 --> 00:02:02,206
Thank you.
All right. Thank you.
44
00:02:02,276 --> 00:02:04,801
I'm Keenen Ivory Wayans
and welcome to In Living Color.
45
00:02:04,879 --> 00:02:07,006
We've been having a lot of fun
here the past few weeks.
46
00:02:07,081 --> 00:02:09,379
So, you know, I've been getting,
like, a lot of letters...
47
00:02:09,450 --> 00:02:11,918
people asking me what I like
most about doing the show.
48
00:02:11,986 --> 00:02:13,920
And I guess
it's working with my family.
49
00:02:13,988 --> 00:02:17,754
And I'd like to start by introducing
my baby brother and my D. J...
50
00:02:17,825 --> 00:02:21,454
- S.W. One.
- [Applause]
51
00:02:28,502 --> 00:02:30,436
What you doin'
with my shoes on, man?
52
00:02:30,504 --> 00:02:32,369
These ain't yours.
53
00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:34,567
I'm gonna wear those.
Take them off, man. Give me my shoes.
54
00:02:34,642 --> 00:02:37,042
- Oh, come on, man. These ain't yours.
- Gimme my shoes.
55
00:02:41,582 --> 00:02:43,516
How you gonna do this
to me, man, on TV?
56
00:02:43,584 --> 00:02:46,109
Why you go in my closet?
57
00:02:46,187 --> 00:02:49,281
All right. Now I want to introduce
my Fly Girls, starting over here...
58
00:02:49,356 --> 00:02:53,122
with Cari, Deidre, Michelle...
59
00:02:53,194 --> 00:02:55,719
Lisa and Carrie Ann.
60
00:02:57,064 --> 00:02:58,998
Yeah.
61
00:03:00,534 --> 00:03:03,526
- All right. We about to get things rolling...
- Keenen.
62
00:03:05,106 --> 00:03:07,040
It ain't funny, man.
Gimme my shirt.
63
00:03:07,108 --> 00:03:10,202
Come on, man.
You said I could wear it yesterday.
64
00:03:10,277 --> 00:03:12,837
Give him the shirt, man.
65
00:03:14,281 --> 00:03:18,479
[Cheering, Applause]
66
00:03:27,661 --> 00:03:31,495
[S. W. One, Indistinct]
67
00:03:31,565 --> 00:03:33,499
Chill out before
I take my chest back.
68
00:03:33,567 --> 00:03:36,001
We'll be in a minute.
Let's go.
69
00:03:37,138 --> 00:03:41,006
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
70
00:03:41,075 --> 00:03:44,169
♪ In living color♪
71
00:03:44,245 --> 00:03:46,805
♪ In living color♪
72
00:03:48,482 --> 00:03:52,179
[Man] On FOX this fall,a principal breathes new life...
73
00:03:52,253 --> 00:03:55,882
into a failing beauty school in theuplifting miniseries Lean On Me, Beautiful.
74
00:03:58,292 --> 00:04:00,590
Good afternoon,
ladies and gentlemen!
75
00:04:00,661 --> 00:04:02,788
My name is Joe Clark.
76
00:04:02,863 --> 00:04:05,457
I am your new principal.
77
00:04:05,533 --> 00:04:08,093
Now, when I point to you,
I want you to line up.
78
00:04:08,169 --> 00:04:13,072
You, you, you and you
and you, line up now.
79
00:04:15,276 --> 00:04:17,335
Expeditiously.
80
00:04:19,013 --> 00:04:21,573
Now, I want all of you
to take a good look at them.
81
00:04:21,649 --> 00:04:24,117
Take a good lookat these mutants.
82
00:04:25,286 --> 00:04:28,050
These are the ugliest kidsin the class.
83
00:04:28,122 --> 00:04:30,056
They have no place here.
84
00:04:30,124 --> 00:04:32,991
I want you all to go home
to your ugly parents right now.
85
00:04:33,060 --> 00:04:34,994
Get on outta here.
86
00:04:35,062 --> 00:04:36,996
Hurry up! Move on!
87
00:04:37,064 --> 00:04:38,998
You too, buzzard!
88
00:04:39,066 --> 00:04:43,059
This is an outrage!
You can't talk to my students this way!
89
00:04:43,137 --> 00:04:45,697
I'm going to
the school superintendent.
90
00:04:45,773 --> 00:04:48,970
Well, go on then. And let the door
hit you in the big putty butt.
91
00:04:49,043 --> 00:04:50,977
Why, I never!
92
00:04:51,045 --> 00:04:54,173
I bet you have not.
93
00:04:54,248 --> 00:04:57,240
Now, do you know what they say
about you out there? Huh?
94
00:04:57,318 --> 00:04:59,548
Grease head, do you know
what they say about you?
95
00:04:59,620 --> 00:05:03,078
They say that the reason
you're in a beauty school...
96
00:05:03,157 --> 00:05:06,388
is because you're too stupid
to go to a regular school.
97
00:05:06,460 --> 00:05:08,394
I happen to think they're right.
98
00:05:08,462 --> 00:05:12,364
But when I'm through with you, you'll be
the smartest dumb people out there.
99
00:05:12,433 --> 00:05:15,266
- What do you want, ugly?
- I don't wanna go!
100
00:05:15,336 --> 00:05:17,736
[Sobbing]
101
00:05:17,805 --> 00:05:19,739
Come with me, boy.
102
00:05:19,807 --> 00:05:22,435
- Come here!
- [Continues Sobbing]
103
00:05:22,509 --> 00:05:26,070
Now, what makes you think
you can be a beautician? Huh?
104
00:05:26,146 --> 00:05:28,842
- What makes you think you can give beauty tips?
- [Stammering]
105
00:05:28,916 --> 00:05:32,511
Look at yourself. You're ugly, boy.
Is your parents ugly?
106
00:05:32,586 --> 00:05:35,020
- Yeah.
- You're gonna grow up to look just like 'em.
107
00:05:35,089 --> 00:05:38,422
If you got ugly parents, you might
as well just jump out the window.
108
00:05:38,492 --> 00:05:40,585
- Do you use chemicals in your hair?
- No.
109
00:05:40,661 --> 00:05:42,788
- Do you use chemicals in your hair?
- Yeah.
110
00:05:42,863 --> 00:05:44,797
Now you got a bad perm
and you're ugly.
111
00:05:44,865 --> 00:05:46,924
The world don't need
another ugly boy with a bad perm.
112
00:05:47,001 --> 00:05:49,834
- Just go on and jump, son.
- Okay.
113
00:05:52,339 --> 00:05:54,603
Now, what are you all
looking at? Huh?
114
00:05:54,675 --> 00:05:56,905
- Let me hear the school song.
- Uh-uh-uh-uh...
115
00:05:56,977 --> 00:05:58,911
Let me hear
the school song now.
116
00:05:58,979 --> 00:06:00,913
We don't have a school song.
117
00:06:00,981 --> 00:06:02,915
- You don't have one?
- N-N-No.
118
00:06:02,983 --> 00:06:05,474
- Then make one up.
- Uh-uh-uh...
119
00:06:05,552 --> 00:06:09,784
♪ Fair Wilford Beauty Acad... ♪
120
00:06:09,857 --> 00:06:11,950
You can do better than that.
121
00:06:12,026 --> 00:06:15,587
♪ I said Wilford Beauty Academy ♪
122
00:06:15,663 --> 00:06:19,895
- ♪ Wilford Beauty Academy ♪
- ♪ I gotta mean ♪
123
00:06:19,967 --> 00:06:22,697
♪ Yes, indeed
I'm doin' hair ♪
124
00:06:22,770 --> 00:06:26,763
♪ Sit in my chair
I'm doin' curls for little girls ♪♪
125
00:06:26,840 --> 00:06:29,274
Mr. Clark...
126
00:06:29,343 --> 00:06:32,801
I think it is a disgrace what you
have done to those children.
127
00:06:32,880 --> 00:06:35,610
I can see why they
call you "CrazyJoe."
128
00:06:35,683 --> 00:06:40,211
- You are an egotist and a demagogue.
- Excuse me, children.
129
00:06:40,287 --> 00:06:43,222
- May I talk to you outside for a moment?
- Follow me.
130
00:06:43,290 --> 00:06:45,224
Carry on.
131
00:06:45,292 --> 00:06:47,760
- Now, how dare you take those children...
- Don't you ever...
132
00:06:47,828 --> 00:06:50,262
[Clark Continues Yelling,Indistinct]
133
00:06:54,435 --> 00:06:57,700
She used to call me "CrazyJoe,"
now she just calls me "Bat Man."
134
00:06:57,771 --> 00:07:00,831
I want this place
cleaned up right now!
135
00:07:00,908 --> 00:07:03,968
[Yelling, Indistinct]
136
00:07:04,044 --> 00:07:08,674
No, Joe! Joe, no, Joe!
There's been a mistake!
137
00:07:08,749 --> 00:07:11,513
You weren't supposed to
come to Wilford Beauty School.
138
00:07:11,585 --> 00:07:15,885
You were supposed to come to
Wilford Central High School.
139
00:07:15,956 --> 00:07:18,220
You'll have to go, Joe.
140
00:07:19,593 --> 00:07:22,221
But I got so much more
to break up.
141
00:07:22,296 --> 00:07:24,355
I don't make the rules.
142
00:07:26,533 --> 00:07:29,001
Well, I'm sorry, children.
143
00:07:29,069 --> 00:07:32,129
I'll no longer be your principal.
I've been reassigned.
144
00:07:32,206 --> 00:07:34,640
Don't go, Mr. Clark.
We need you!
145
00:07:34,708 --> 00:07:36,835
We love you, Mr. Clark!
146
00:07:36,910 --> 00:07:38,878
Yeah, Joe, don't go!
147
00:07:38,946 --> 00:07:42,279
I mean, who's gonna give me
that extra push I need?
148
00:07:44,651 --> 00:07:47,279
- Boy, you children really are stupid.
- [Chuckles]
149
00:07:47,354 --> 00:07:49,515
Well, maybe I should
stick around.
150
00:07:49,590 --> 00:07:51,524
Looks like they're gonna
need somebody to lean on.
151
00:07:51,592 --> 00:07:53,492
- Yea!
- [Man] All righty then.
152
00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:56,188
♪♪ [Singing]
153
00:08:05,439 --> 00:08:10,035
Lean On Me, Beautiful: TheJoe Clark Story,
Part II, only on FOX.
154
00:08:16,150 --> 00:08:18,345
I found true love and happiness.
155
00:08:18,419 --> 00:08:21,149
And I found the guy of my dreams.
156
00:08:21,221 --> 00:08:24,918
And you, too, can enjoy
interracial splendor...
157
00:08:24,992 --> 00:08:27,654
[Together]
On the Mitzvah Train.
158
00:08:27,728 --> 00:08:30,196
So why not climb aboard
the Mitzvah Train...
159
00:08:30,264 --> 00:08:34,860
the city's premiere
Afro-Judeo video dating service.
160
00:08:34,935 --> 00:08:40,237
Bridge some of those cultural gaps
while doin' the wild thing.
161
00:08:40,307 --> 00:08:42,867
You'll find you have a lot more
in common than you thought...
162
00:08:42,943 --> 00:08:46,970
slavery, hard-to-manage hair,
Sammy Davis Jr.
163
00:08:47,047 --> 00:08:50,881
Hey, maybe your grandfather
was your date's slumlord.
164
00:08:50,951 --> 00:08:54,387
- Mine was.
- So why not give it a try?
165
00:08:54,455 --> 00:08:58,482
That's right. I didn't know
a matzo ball from a basketball...
166
00:08:58,559 --> 00:09:00,789
till I met Mitzi.
167
00:09:00,861 --> 00:09:02,852
Ahmad taught me
the Roger Rabbit dance...
168
00:09:02,930 --> 00:09:06,866
and I was even able
to try it out at a Kool Moe Dee concert.
169
00:09:06,934 --> 00:09:12,099
I love my Yiddish mama so much,
I've had myself circumcised...
170
00:09:12,172 --> 00:09:14,470
twice.
171
00:09:14,541 --> 00:09:17,567
And I'm thinking about
going back for another cut.
172
00:09:21,482 --> 00:09:23,746
So come on down
to Mitzvah Train.
173
00:09:23,817 --> 00:09:27,275
And remember, we're not only
the owners of the Mitzvah Train...
174
00:09:27,354 --> 00:09:30,187
[Together]
But we're also clients.
175
00:09:37,831 --> 00:09:42,063
You are strong. You are beautiful.
You are perfect.
176
00:09:42,136 --> 00:09:46,266
Welcome to the show
for, by and about women...
177
00:09:46,340 --> 00:09:48,774
Go On, Girl.!
178
00:09:54,281 --> 00:09:56,613
I'm your host
Shawanda Harvey.
179
00:09:56,683 --> 00:10:00,278
Many of you have read my book
Eve Stands Alone.
180
00:10:00,354 --> 00:10:03,585
In this book, I try to
encourage women to be strong...
181
00:10:03,657 --> 00:10:07,559
independent and unencumbered
by the fetters of a man's world.
182
00:10:07,628 --> 00:10:12,361
Today, my guests are two women that say
that my book has changed their lives.
183
00:10:12,432 --> 00:10:16,698
Let's welcome, from the New City
Dance Ensemble, Keyana.
184
00:10:16,770 --> 00:10:20,399
- [All] Go on, girl! Go on, girl!
- All right.
185
00:10:20,474 --> 00:10:25,377
All right. And prominent artist
Lavonia Bufume.
186
00:10:25,445 --> 00:10:28,812
- [All] Go on, girl.!- All right.
187
00:10:28,882 --> 00:10:34,218
Keyana, you are strong.
You are beautiful. You are perfect.
188
00:10:34,288 --> 00:10:36,586
- Yes, I am!
- Yes, you are!
189
00:10:36,657 --> 00:10:38,716
How has my book
changed your life?
190
00:10:38,792 --> 00:10:40,384
- Shawanda...
- Mm-hmm.
191
00:10:40,460 --> 00:10:42,860
- When I first became interested in dance...
- Mm-hmm.
192
00:10:42,930 --> 00:10:45,364
- The male entity that I was dwelling with...
- Mm-hmm.
193
00:10:45,432 --> 00:10:47,366
- He didn't support me.
- Go on, girl.
194
00:10:47,434 --> 00:10:49,868
Girl, he tried to trivialize
my womanly creativity.
195
00:10:49,937 --> 00:10:52,565
- No! Mm-mm-mm.
- Yes, he did.
196
00:10:52,639 --> 00:10:54,607
But your book...
your book showed me...
197
00:10:54,675 --> 00:10:58,873
that I did not
need a man to validate me!
198
00:10:58,946 --> 00:11:01,437
- [All] Go on, girl!
- All right.
199
00:11:01,515 --> 00:11:04,416
- [All Sigh]
- I'm gone!
200
00:11:04,484 --> 00:11:07,851
Lavonia, you are strong.
You are perfect.
201
00:11:07,921 --> 00:11:10,151
What about beautiful?
202
00:11:10,224 --> 00:11:12,749
Of course you're beautiful.
Don't you have a similar story?
203
00:11:12,826 --> 00:11:14,760
- Oh, I most certainly do. Do you know...
- Mm-hmm.
204
00:11:14,828 --> 00:11:16,762
- That when I wanted to take art lessons...
- Mm-hmm.
205
00:11:16,830 --> 00:11:20,129
My significant other
was too cheap to pay for them?
206
00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:22,259
Typical, sister. Typical.
207
00:11:22,336 --> 00:11:26,534
Then he used to have this line he would say
to me, " A woman is as sweet as honey...
208
00:11:26,607 --> 00:11:28,598
[Guests] as long as
she don't want no money."
209
00:11:28,675 --> 00:11:32,008
Girl, my significant other used to say
the same thing to me.
210
00:11:32,079 --> 00:11:34,604
Girl, go on. Then, he tried to
make it up to me...
211
00:11:34,681 --> 00:11:37,514
by buying me this cheap,
fake African necklace.
212
00:11:37,584 --> 00:11:40,212
You know, I used to have
a necklace just like that.
213
00:11:40,287 --> 00:11:42,755
- No! But I showed him...
- Yeah, girl.
214
00:11:42,823 --> 00:11:47,590
That he wasn't nearly as significant
as he thought he was.
215
00:11:47,661 --> 00:11:51,893
- [All] Go on, girl. Go on!
- That's right!
216
00:11:51,965 --> 00:11:53,990
- And now you're an up-and-coming artist...
- That's right.
217
00:11:54,067 --> 00:11:56,535
- And you don't have to depend on a man.
- That's right.
218
00:11:56,603 --> 00:11:59,197
- But, girl, you can't depend on a man.
- I know you can't.
219
00:11:59,273 --> 00:12:01,207
- My man took art lessons.
- Go on.
220
00:12:01,275 --> 00:12:03,573
- He came home with all these nude drawings.
- Mm-hmm.
221
00:12:03,644 --> 00:12:06,442
Talk about he don't need
no nude model to draw 'em.
222
00:12:06,513 --> 00:12:09,482
- Go on. Not to me.
- Do I look like a fool to you?
223
00:12:09,549 --> 00:12:11,483
- Not my sister!
- Girl!
224
00:12:11,551 --> 00:12:14,418
You talk about up and coming?
225
00:12:14,488 --> 00:12:18,015
I heard that. I can't trust my Umbatu
as far as I can throw him.
226
00:12:18,091 --> 00:12:21,788
- Umbatu? That's my man's name.
- Umbatu!
227
00:12:21,862 --> 00:12:24,854
Oh, sisters, sisters!
No, no, no!
228
00:12:24,931 --> 00:12:27,092
I'm sure that's
just a coincidence.
229
00:12:27,167 --> 00:12:30,295
Come to think of it, you even look like
the girl in the pictures.
230
00:12:30,370 --> 00:12:32,531
Oh, now, sister, you know how art is.
You can't ever tell.
231
00:12:32,606 --> 00:12:35,268
Art nothing. I recognize
her big butt anywhere.
232
00:12:35,342 --> 00:12:37,833
Oh! Big butt, honey?
At least I got one.
233
00:12:37,911 --> 00:12:40,175
- A man's gotta have something to hold on to.
- Is that so?
234
00:12:40,247 --> 00:12:42,613
Sisters, remember,
"Go on, girl."
235
00:12:42,683 --> 00:12:45,550
- You better go on!
- Go on!
236
00:12:45,619 --> 00:12:47,587
- And speaking of something to hold on to...
- Yes.
237
00:12:47,654 --> 00:12:50,418
He better not try holding on to
that fake hair of yours.
238
00:12:50,490 --> 00:12:53,288
- Go on, girl. I mean, go on, girl.
- Oh!
239
00:12:53,360 --> 00:12:55,828
Oh, see now, you need to
take your flat behind...
240
00:12:55,896 --> 00:12:58,729
no dancin', wanna be on Soul Train
or Africa...
241
00:12:58,799 --> 00:13:00,767
send you back to America
wherever they found you.
242
00:13:00,834 --> 00:13:02,768
- Oh, is that so?
- That's right!
243
00:13:02,836 --> 00:13:06,704
Sisters, you are fighting over a man.
You don't need that.
244
00:13:06,773 --> 00:13:11,039
- Remember, Eve stands alone.
- Well, it's television.
245
00:13:11,111 --> 00:13:13,272
All right. Well.
246
00:13:13,347 --> 00:13:16,510
Now, all together,
"Go on, girl."
247
00:13:16,583 --> 00:13:18,517
[Guests, Unenthusiastically]
Go on, girl.
248
00:13:20,487 --> 00:13:23,581
Well, that's it today
for Go On, Girl...
249
00:13:23,657 --> 00:13:26,148
the show by, for
and about women.
250
00:13:26,226 --> 00:13:28,820
- Didn't you lose on Star Search?
- That's it!
251
00:13:28,895 --> 00:13:31,625
[Overlapping Yelling]
252
00:13:37,961 --> 00:13:41,192
First of all,
we must internalize...
253
00:13:41,264 --> 00:13:44,324
the "flatulation"
of the matter...
254
00:13:44,400 --> 00:13:50,168
by transmitting the effervescence of
the "Indianisian" proximity...
255
00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:53,573
in order to further segregate...
256
00:13:53,643 --> 00:13:57,238
the crux
of my venereal infection.
257
00:13:57,313 --> 00:14:02,216
Now, if I may retain
my liquids here for one moment...
258
00:14:02,285 --> 00:14:05,743
I'd like to continue
the "redundance"...
259
00:14:05,822 --> 00:14:10,282
of my quote, unquote,
"intestinal tract," you see...
260
00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:13,727
because to preclude
on the issue of world domination...
261
00:14:13,796 --> 00:14:16,128
would only circumvent...
[Clears Throat]
262
00:14:16,199 --> 00:14:19,657
Excuse me,
circumcise the revelation...
263
00:14:19,736 --> 00:14:23,194
that reflects
the "Afro-disiatic" symptoms...
264
00:14:23,273 --> 00:14:27,767
which now perpetrates
theJheri curls activation.
265
00:14:27,844 --> 00:14:32,178
See, so by the...
Do not misinterpret the chauvinistic...
266
00:14:32,248 --> 00:14:35,240
[Man] Give to the United NegroScholarship Fund.
267
00:14:35,318 --> 00:14:39,015
Because a mind is a terrible thingto develop without help.
268
00:14:39,088 --> 00:14:43,491
Allow me to expose
my colon once again.
269
00:14:43,559 --> 00:14:48,121
The ramification inflicted
on the incision...
270
00:14:48,197 --> 00:14:52,065
placed within
the Fallopian cavities...
271
00:14:52,135 --> 00:14:54,603
serves to be holistic...
272
00:14:54,671 --> 00:14:57,970
taken from the Latin word
"jalapeño."
273
00:15:07,483 --> 00:15:11,351
[Man] Coming this fallon Too-Too Ethnic.
274
00:15:11,421 --> 00:15:13,981
- Mm-mm-mm. Whoo-whee!
- What?
275
00:15:14,057 --> 00:15:16,025
- Uh-huh. Mary!
- [Scoffs]
276
00:15:16,092 --> 00:15:18,026
- Nu-uh, honey. Child.
- Word.
277
00:15:18,094 --> 00:15:21,154
- Ooh! She's up.
- Hush! Girl, I'll pull your 411.
278
00:15:21,230 --> 00:15:24,222
You need 911 at 227
24/7, 365, you hear me?
279
00:15:24,300 --> 00:15:26,894
- Oh! Be there!
- Be there!
280
00:15:26,969 --> 00:15:29,631
[Man]This fall on FOX.
281
00:15:30,206 --> 00:15:33,437
♪♪ [Hip-hop]
282
00:15:39,215 --> 00:15:41,775
♪♪ [Rapping]
283
00:15:56,165 --> 00:15:58,224
♪♪ [Continues]
284
00:16:08,544 --> 00:16:10,478
- Hi, Mom.
- Hi, Timmy.
285
00:16:10,546 --> 00:16:12,480
Where's Lassie?
286
00:16:12,548 --> 00:16:15,346
She's outside. I'll get her.
287
00:16:17,820 --> 00:16:20,152
- Lassie!
- [Traffic Noises]
288
00:16:20,223 --> 00:16:23,920
Oh, Lassie!
289
00:16:23,993 --> 00:16:27,258
[Growling]
290
00:16:34,237 --> 00:16:36,364
[Barks]
291
00:16:43,045 --> 00:16:45,309
Mom, can Lassie and I
go out and play?
292
00:16:45,381 --> 00:16:49,147
I don't think that's a good idea, Timmy.
This just isn't a safe neighborhood.
293
00:16:49,218 --> 00:16:51,880
Don't worry, Mom.
Lassie will protect me.
294
00:16:51,954 --> 00:16:55,685
After all, there's no breed of dog
that's smarter, more loyal...
295
00:16:55,758 --> 00:16:57,692
or more protective
than a pit bull.
296
00:16:57,760 --> 00:17:03,289
You and Lassie are to play indoors and I won't
hear another word about it, young man.
297
00:17:03,366 --> 00:17:07,666
- [Growls, Barks]
- Mom, I think she's trying to tell us something.
298
00:17:07,737 --> 00:17:11,070
Well... Well, what is it, girl?
There's danger?
299
00:17:11,140 --> 00:17:12,767
- [Barking]
- What danger?
300
00:17:12,842 --> 00:17:15,276
From land? Fatherland?
301
00:17:15,344 --> 00:17:17,209
[Barks]
302
00:17:17,280 --> 00:17:21,512
You think there would be some danger
in the reunification of Germany?
303
00:17:21,584 --> 00:17:24,485
Oh, Lassie,
I understand your concerns...
304
00:17:24,554 --> 00:17:29,287
but the political climate today is much
different than it was 50 years ago.
305
00:17:29,358 --> 00:17:32,384
[Barking]
306
00:17:32,462 --> 00:17:36,694
Maybe we should stop lining Lassie's dog bed
with U.S. News and World Report.
307
00:17:36,766 --> 00:17:38,825
I think you
might be right, Timmy.
308
00:17:38,901 --> 00:17:41,461
- [Lassie Growling]- [Man] Hey, somebody get this dog off me.!
309
00:17:41,537 --> 00:17:47,305
Help.! Help.![Screaming]
310
00:17:50,947 --> 00:17:53,279
What do you have there, girl?
311
00:17:54,317 --> 00:17:57,445
It's an arm.
Somebody lost an arm.
312
00:17:57,520 --> 00:18:00,114
It's a good thing
you found it, Lassie.
313
00:18:00,189 --> 00:18:02,987
Maybe the owner
will give us a reward.
314
00:18:03,059 --> 00:18:05,960
I'll just put it over here
with the other arms, Timmy.
315
00:18:06,028 --> 00:18:07,962
[Lassie Barking]
316
00:18:08,030 --> 00:18:12,399
Listen, Mom. I think Lassie's
trying to tell us something else.
317
00:18:12,468 --> 00:18:15,869
What's that, girl?
Open the letter?
318
00:18:15,938 --> 00:18:18,168
Why...
319
00:18:18,241 --> 00:18:20,675
Oh, Timmy,
it's an eviction notice.
320
00:18:20,743 --> 00:18:25,043
They're trying to throw us out of our home
for harboring a dangerous animal.
321
00:18:25,114 --> 00:18:27,981
Now, what animal
could they be referring to?
322
00:18:28,050 --> 00:18:32,714
That's it, Mom!
That's what Lassie was trying to tell us.
323
00:18:32,788 --> 00:18:35,916
Not "fatherland," "landlord."
324
00:18:35,992 --> 00:18:40,122
See, we were in danger,and Lassie was helping us.
325
00:18:40,196 --> 00:18:43,632
- Come here, girl. Let me give you a big hug.
- [Lassie Barking]
326
00:18:43,699 --> 00:18:46,327
- We owe you a lot.
- [Growling]
327
00:18:46,402 --> 00:18:50,133
- Jeepers! We love you, Lassie.
- We love you, Lassie.
328
00:19:02,552 --> 00:19:04,486
[Yells]
329
00:19:04,554 --> 00:19:07,352
[Man]Richard Pryor is back.
330
00:19:07,423 --> 00:19:12,417
[Mumbling, Indistinct]
331
00:19:12,495 --> 00:19:16,261
- Oh!
- And this time he's more scared than ever.
332
00:19:16,332 --> 00:19:18,630
[Mumbling, Indistinct]
333
00:19:18,701 --> 00:19:20,692
Ooh, nasty.
334
00:19:20,770 --> 00:19:23,637
[Continues Mumbling,
Groaning]
335
00:19:27,743 --> 00:19:30,303
[Screams]
336
00:19:30,379 --> 00:19:35,248
[Yelling, Indistinct]
337
00:19:37,219 --> 00:19:40,711
Richard Pryor is
Scared For No Reason.
338
00:19:42,124 --> 00:19:45,958
♪♪ [Hip-hop]
339
00:20:18,194 --> 00:20:23,632
♪♪ [Continues]
340
00:20:29,739 --> 00:20:31,900
[Laughing, Chattering]
341
00:20:39,348 --> 00:20:42,146
It's really hot.
I sure wish I could take a dip.
342
00:20:42,218 --> 00:20:45,312
- Well, why don't you?
- Well, it's that time...
343
00:20:45,388 --> 00:20:47,447
and I'm not sure
of my protection.
344
00:20:47,523 --> 00:20:51,357
Girlfriend, it's time you switched
to a more absorbent brand.
345
00:20:51,427 --> 00:20:54,863
Here. Try these. Vortex II.
346
00:20:54,930 --> 00:20:56,921
I'm using them now.
347
00:20:56,999 --> 00:20:58,796
Hmm.
348
00:21:05,141 --> 00:21:08,770
[Suction Sound]
349
00:21:15,584 --> 00:21:18,382
[Wind Whistling]
350
00:21:23,025 --> 00:21:25,789
[Slurping Sound]
351
00:21:30,199 --> 00:21:34,192
Hey! Hey!
352
00:21:35,371 --> 00:21:38,204
[Woman]Vortex II. It's superabsorbent.
353
00:21:38,274 --> 00:21:41,141
Where'd the water go?
354
00:21:44,780 --> 00:21:46,839
All right.
355
00:21:52,488 --> 00:21:56,117
Thank you. Thank you for joining us.
We hope you had a good time.
356
00:21:56,192 --> 00:21:58,126
Crystal, tell 'em what to do.
357
00:21:58,194 --> 00:22:01,163
Tune in next time.
358
00:22:01,230 --> 00:22:04,131
[Audience Whooping]
359
00:22:47,143 --> 00:22:50,874
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
360
00:22:50,946 --> 00:22:53,073
♪ In living color♪♪
29684
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof