All language subtitles for In Living Color s03e27 - DVDrip.Xvid.mp3

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,753 --> 00:00:06,588 Well, now that the F.D.A. Has banned silicone breast implants... 2 00:00:06,658 --> 00:00:09,627 I better call the doctor and have them removed. 3 00:00:09,694 --> 00:00:11,992 [Man] Wait.! Stop what you're doing. 4 00:00:12,063 --> 00:00:14,497 Why? These are no good for me. 5 00:00:14,565 --> 00:00:16,499 [Man Chuckles] That's what you think. 6 00:00:16,567 --> 00:00:19,400 But did you know you could be throwing away hours of fun? 7 00:00:19,470 --> 00:00:23,133 But I can't keep these. Silicone isn't safe. 8 00:00:23,207 --> 00:00:27,473 No, not silicone...SillyCone. 9 00:00:27,545 --> 00:00:31,538 Yes, like Silly Putty, SillyCone is the breast you can play with. 10 00:00:32,950 --> 00:00:36,818 Take it on thejob to relieve stress. 11 00:00:36,888 --> 00:00:40,187 Copy your favorite comic strip. 12 00:00:40,258 --> 00:00:43,193 - [Chattering] - They're great fun at birthday parties. 13 00:00:44,295 --> 00:00:46,263 You can even make them do tricks. 14 00:00:46,331 --> 00:00:50,597 SillyCone comes in three sizes: Bouncy, meaty and grandma. 15 00:00:52,737 --> 00:00:53,726 - How you livin'? - What? 16 00:00:53,805 --> 00:00:54,897 - How you livin'? - What? 17 00:00:54,972 --> 00:00:57,099 - How you livin'? - ♪ In living color♪ 18 00:00:59,544 --> 00:01:03,981 - ♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 19 00:01:04,048 --> 00:01:08,007 - ♪ Anything you want is up to you ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 20 00:01:08,086 --> 00:01:11,453 - ♪ You for me and me for you ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 21 00:01:11,522 --> 00:01:16,789 - ♪ You can be anything you wanna be ♪ - ♪ In living color♪ 22 00:01:16,861 --> 00:01:18,920 ♪ Let's take a trip and sip on a dream ♪ 23 00:01:18,996 --> 00:01:21,157 ♪ Glide with the guide on a funky scene ♪ 24 00:01:21,232 --> 00:01:23,700 ♪ Here comes another one of those funky, funny mo'money shows ♪ 25 00:01:23,768 --> 00:01:25,292 ♪ A cast for laughs and talented roles ♪ 26 00:01:25,370 --> 00:01:27,497 ♪ And sisters with twisters for you been lookin', listener♪ 27 00:01:27,572 --> 00:01:29,540 ♪ It seems you don't believe so you can believe what I convince ya ♪ 28 00:01:29,607 --> 00:01:31,632 ♪ Some booty to your short and thought We'll make it snappy ♪ 29 00:01:31,709 --> 00:01:33,802 ♪ With jokes and pokes at folks to keep you happy ♪ 30 00:01:33,878 --> 00:01:36,073 ♪ No need to hold your remote control ♪ 31 00:01:36,147 --> 00:01:38,115 ♪ Chill This show's got soul ♪ 32 00:01:38,182 --> 00:01:40,275 ♪ All aboard, all aboard The train never troubles ♪ 33 00:01:40,351 --> 00:01:41,716 ♪ You'd better snuggle up couple up ♪ 34 00:01:41,786 --> 00:01:43,481 - ♪ On the double-dub-double ♪ - ♪ Yeah ♪ 35 00:01:43,554 --> 00:01:46,785 ♪ It's hard to believe but some of the best things in life are free ♪ 36 00:01:46,858 --> 00:01:48,883 ♪ So, fellas, grab your girl Tell her that you love her♪ 37 00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:51,326 ♪ 'Cause that's the way you're livin' when you're livin'in living color♪ 38 00:01:51,396 --> 00:01:54,729 ♪ Go, go, go, go go, go, go, go ♪ 39 00:01:54,799 --> 00:02:00,635 ♪ Go, go, go, go go, go, go, go ♪ 40 00:02:00,705 --> 00:02:05,142 ♪ Go, go, go, go go, go, go, go ♪ 41 00:02:05,209 --> 00:02:06,437 ♪ Go, go, go ♪ 42 00:02:06,511 --> 00:02:08,502 ♪ Go, go, go, go ♪♪ 43 00:02:12,250 --> 00:02:14,582 - [Screaming] - [Shouting, Indistinct] 44 00:02:18,356 --> 00:02:20,916 Hey! How you doin'? 45 00:02:20,992 --> 00:02:23,688 Who would've ever thought that Miss Benita'd turn out to be... 46 00:02:23,761 --> 00:02:26,025 the delegate representin' the Hopkins Projects? 47 00:02:26,097 --> 00:02:28,998 [Giggles] Course, I always been one to better myself. 48 00:02:29,066 --> 00:02:33,469 Mm-hmm. Honey, when them other heifers were out runnin' numbers and eatin' Scooter Pies... 49 00:02:33,538 --> 00:02:36,530 Miss Benita was out registerin' voters for the Rainbow Coalition. 50 00:02:36,607 --> 00:02:41,408 That's right. Honey, I dropped out of grade school so I could earn some money for college. 51 00:02:41,479 --> 00:02:43,640 Oh! Oh, lookie there! 52 00:02:43,714 --> 00:02:46,842 There go Paul Tsongas! There go Paul Tsongas! 53 00:02:46,918 --> 00:02:49,580 Oh, he's a fine man, fine man. 54 00:02:49,654 --> 00:02:53,818 Honey, overcoming that dreadful disease to run for office... Oh, boy. 55 00:02:53,891 --> 00:02:56,883 And he was in the hospital with all them operations. 56 00:02:56,961 --> 00:02:59,088 Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm. 57 00:03:00,231 --> 00:03:02,392 Surgeons removed everything but the ugly. 58 00:03:04,902 --> 00:03:08,565 What Mr. Tsongas really needs is a "face-ectomy." 59 00:03:08,639 --> 00:03:10,630 The man's so ugly, when he was born... 60 00:03:10,708 --> 00:03:12,699 the doctors almost circumcised the wrong end. 61 00:03:14,111 --> 00:03:16,602 But I ain't one to gossip, so you ain't heard that from me. 62 00:03:16,681 --> 00:03:18,740 No, you... [Gasps] 63 00:03:18,816 --> 00:03:21,307 Oh, look at this! Bill Clinton! 64 00:03:21,385 --> 00:03:25,378 Hey, Bill! Hey, Bill, I know you hear me. Bill! 65 00:03:25,456 --> 00:03:29,256 Oh, you know, honey, all that dirt on Bill Clinton... 66 00:03:29,327 --> 00:03:32,091 you know, the extramarital affair, theJesseJackson thing? 67 00:03:32,163 --> 00:03:34,461 None of that mean he can't be a good president. 68 00:03:34,532 --> 00:03:37,695 Mm-hmm. Honey, you talk about Bill Clinton, you ask Miss Benita... 69 00:03:37,768 --> 00:03:40,396 and Miss Benita says, "Now there goes a good candidate." 70 00:03:40,471 --> 00:03:42,405 [Chuckles] 71 00:03:42,473 --> 00:03:44,873 Candidate for penicillin. 72 00:03:47,411 --> 00:03:50,869 Honey, that man done seen more drawers than a panty shield. 73 00:03:52,283 --> 00:03:56,617 That's the first man I know to discover Victoria's secret. 74 00:03:56,687 --> 00:04:00,885 But I ain't one to gossip, so you ain't heard that from me. No, you haven't. 75 00:04:00,958 --> 00:04:02,892 Course, as much as I love my Democrats... 76 00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:05,793 they gonna have some stiff competition from the Republicans this year... 77 00:04:05,863 --> 00:04:09,128 Mm-hmm. Especially with that Pat Buchanan up for office. 78 00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:12,658 You know Pat Buchanan, the man who used to have that show Crossfire? 79 00:04:12,737 --> 00:04:15,297 Oh, yeah. Honey, I loves me some Crossfire. 80 00:04:15,373 --> 00:04:17,307 I watch that show every night. 81 00:04:17,375 --> 00:04:19,366 [Laughing] 82 00:04:21,379 --> 00:04:24,871 I just wish he'd get that cross fire off my front lawn. 83 00:04:27,652 --> 00:04:31,486 Honey, that man ain't nothin' but David Duke without the tummy tuck. 84 00:04:32,790 --> 00:04:34,951 You put that cracker in office, and come Christmas... 85 00:04:35,026 --> 00:04:39,588 there's gonna be a lot more than tinsel hanging off the White House tree. 86 00:04:39,664 --> 00:04:44,226 I ain't one to gossip, so you ain't heard that from me. No, you haven't. 87 00:04:44,302 --> 00:04:47,135 Course, as many competitors as they have... 88 00:04:47,204 --> 00:04:49,866 it's gonna be hard for anybody to get into office now... 89 00:04:49,941 --> 00:04:53,536 because of the fine job that Mr. George Herbert Walker Bush is doin'. 90 00:04:53,611 --> 00:04:57,741 That's right, honey. Him and Barbara Bush, the first lady. 91 00:05:00,484 --> 00:05:03,647 First grandlady is more like it. 92 00:05:03,721 --> 00:05:05,882 Now, I knew Bush was tight with Uncle Sam... 93 00:05:05,957 --> 00:05:08,653 but he didn't have to up and marry him. 94 00:05:08,726 --> 00:05:12,253 Honey, the only thing in worse shape than this economy is her booty. 95 00:05:12,330 --> 00:05:15,493 That butt hangs so low it sweeps up after itself. 96 00:05:18,202 --> 00:05:22,195 And that Vice President Quayle... that Vice President Quayle is so dumb... 97 00:05:22,273 --> 00:05:24,537 he need a tutor to read Bush's lips. 98 00:05:26,544 --> 00:05:29,342 But I ain't one to gossip, so you ain't heard that from me. 99 00:05:29,413 --> 00:05:31,608 No, you haven't. Mm, mm, mm. 100 00:05:31,682 --> 00:05:34,014 That's right, honey. Come November... 101 00:05:34,085 --> 00:05:36,713 ain't no doubt who Miss Benita's gonna vote for. 102 00:05:39,357 --> 00:05:41,291 That's right, honey. 103 00:05:41,359 --> 00:05:44,817 Miss Benita gonna write in a vote for Miss Jenkins, honey. 104 00:05:44,895 --> 00:05:47,728 'Cause Miss Jenkins is like a mama to me, honey. 105 00:05:47,798 --> 00:05:50,665 I loves me some Miss Jenkins. [Gasps] 106 00:05:50,735 --> 00:05:54,398 Don't nobody better say nothing bad about Miss Jenkins, honey. 107 00:05:54,472 --> 00:05:56,406 Nobody... That's right. 108 00:05:56,474 --> 00:05:59,204 Miss Jenkins gonna put some excitement back in the White House. 109 00:06:02,113 --> 00:06:05,674 Just don't let her use the bathroom in the Oval Office. 110 00:06:05,750 --> 00:06:09,242 Woman'll stink it up so bad they'll put that wall back up in Germany. 111 00:06:13,190 --> 00:06:17,183 But I ain't one to gossip, so you ain't heard that from me. 112 00:06:17,261 --> 00:06:20,253 Oh, look! There goes Gary Hart! 113 00:06:20,331 --> 00:06:23,232 Gary! Gary! Gary! 114 00:06:32,376 --> 00:06:35,868 Hey! I'm Crazy Tom down here at Crazy Tom's Appliances. 115 00:06:35,946 --> 00:06:38,779 You in the market for a stereo, VCR or big-screen TV? 116 00:06:38,849 --> 00:06:41,750 Well, what ya waitin' on? Come on down here and make yourself a deal... 117 00:06:41,819 --> 00:06:44,083 before my medication wears off. 118 00:06:44,155 --> 00:06:46,988 [Gasps] Uh, yeah. Uh, yeah. I'm on medication. 119 00:06:47,058 --> 00:06:50,289 Take a look at this here. A Hitachi 45-inch big-screen TV... 120 00:06:50,361 --> 00:06:52,591 complete with remote control and Dolby speakers. 121 00:06:52,663 --> 00:06:54,756 Now, what do you think something like this go for? 122 00:06:54,832 --> 00:06:57,995 $5,000? Nope. A thousand dollars? Uh-uh. 123 00:06:58,069 --> 00:07:00,867 Try, uh, $1.50. Uh, yeah. Uh, yeah. 124 00:07:00,938 --> 00:07:04,066 How can we do it? I just told you. I'm crazy! 125 00:07:04,141 --> 00:07:08,339 So come on down and meet some of my crazy salespeople. Tell 'em what we got, Lennie. 126 00:07:08,412 --> 00:07:11,210 We have these beautifulJ.V.C. Amplifiers on sale today... 127 00:07:11,282 --> 00:07:13,216 meat pie. 128 00:07:13,284 --> 00:07:16,617 So you might want to come down because I can give you one heck of a... 129 00:07:16,687 --> 00:07:19,178 rabbit... deal. 130 00:07:19,256 --> 00:07:22,316 So be sure to ask for me, Lennie. Hope to see ya! 131 00:07:22,393 --> 00:07:24,554 Cock-a-doodie. 132 00:07:26,797 --> 00:07:30,255 Oh, man! Man, we even take trade-ins. 133 00:07:30,334 --> 00:07:33,394 - We'll take anything! - Hey, will you take this bottle? 134 00:07:33,471 --> 00:07:36,065 Sure! Grab yourself a VCR. 135 00:07:36,140 --> 00:07:39,405 He made... He made himself a good deal. 136 00:07:39,477 --> 00:07:42,173 Now let me introduce you to our lovely cashier. 137 00:07:42,246 --> 00:07:44,680 Go ahead. Tell 'em how many stereos we've sold this week. 138 00:07:44,749 --> 00:07:47,115 642, definitely. 642... 139 00:07:47,184 --> 00:07:50,676 Oh! 3:00,Judge Wapner's on. Doug Luellen, Doug Luellen, Doug Luellen. 140 00:07:52,323 --> 00:07:54,587 Right. Thank you, Rain Woman. 141 00:07:54,658 --> 00:07:57,923 Hey, man. You got no money, pay me later. 142 00:07:57,995 --> 00:08:02,762 We've been serving the community since 19... last Friday. Uh, yeah. Uh, yeah. Uh, yeah. 143 00:08:02,833 --> 00:08:05,427 You know, people always come up to me. They say, "Crazy Tom?" 144 00:08:05,503 --> 00:08:09,166 I say, " What?" They say, " How can you sell all that high-quality merchandise... 145 00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:11,800 at such a low, low price and still make a profit?" 146 00:08:11,876 --> 00:08:13,810 I don't! 147 00:08:14,979 --> 00:08:17,140 I'm crazy! 148 00:08:17,214 --> 00:08:20,081 [Man] Crazy Tom's Going Out of My Mind Sale... 149 00:08:20,151 --> 00:08:22,483 Open seven days a week, midnight to 6:00 a.m. 150 00:08:22,553 --> 00:08:25,681 Crazy Tom's... We're slashing prices.! 151 00:08:25,756 --> 00:08:27,849 ♪♪ [Hip-hop] 152 00:09:05,887 --> 00:09:08,549 Uh, hello. My name is LaShawn, and I will be your tour guide... 153 00:09:08,623 --> 00:09:10,557 for the Native American art exhibit. 154 00:09:10,625 --> 00:09:14,356 The rules are as follows. Pay attention 'cause I only say things once. 155 00:09:14,429 --> 00:09:17,865 So don't be talking while I'm talking, or better yet, just don't say nothing. 156 00:09:17,933 --> 00:09:20,663 Now, we will get started as soon as the rest of us get here. 157 00:09:21,736 --> 00:09:23,670 Oh, l... I'm so sorry. 158 00:09:23,738 --> 00:09:26,434 I was just admiring that beautiful piece of work back there. 159 00:09:26,508 --> 00:09:28,669 - Did you realize that the Cherokee Indians never... - Uh-huh. 160 00:09:28,743 --> 00:09:32,543 Look, I'm sure you came here with a wealth of information to share with us today... 161 00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:36,880 but, uh, if you don't mind, your trip to Little Big Horn is not on my schedule. 162 00:09:36,952 --> 00:09:38,943 Uh, can we move right along? 163 00:09:39,020 --> 00:09:43,081 Uh, this was done in 1894 by the artist Running Feather. 164 00:09:43,158 --> 00:09:45,422 You know, actually, I'm well acquainted with her work. 165 00:09:45,493 --> 00:09:48,860 - She didn't pick up a paintbrush until she was 57 years old. - My goodness. 166 00:09:48,930 --> 00:09:51,592 Oh, I could be wrong, but last time I checked... 167 00:09:51,666 --> 00:09:53,896 I was working alone. 168 00:09:53,969 --> 00:09:58,372 Uh, now if you feel that you can enrich the lives of this tour group so much... 169 00:09:58,440 --> 00:10:01,409 you could just go back downstairs and fill out an application. 170 00:10:01,476 --> 00:10:03,467 Okay, can we please move on? 171 00:10:05,180 --> 00:10:07,114 Whoa! What's this? 172 00:10:07,182 --> 00:10:09,275 Are you blind? That's a bow and arrow. 173 00:10:10,886 --> 00:10:13,548 Uh... Uh, excuse me! 174 00:10:13,622 --> 00:10:16,955 Did you see a sign that said you could take some pictures? 175 00:10:17,025 --> 00:10:20,722 - Well, I was just taking... - Just answer the question. 176 00:10:20,795 --> 00:10:23,730 I was just taking pictures for my wife. Me and my wife, we met at a museum. 177 00:10:23,798 --> 00:10:26,858 - Oh, that's nice. - Oh, that is beautiful and romantic. 178 00:10:26,935 --> 00:10:30,769 I'm sure that Chuck Woolery would be very touched to hear your story... 179 00:10:30,839 --> 00:10:32,932 but since we don't care about you or your wife... 180 00:10:33,008 --> 00:10:35,067 do you care to join us on the tour? 181 00:10:36,444 --> 00:10:39,971 - [Shouting] - You don't come in here with that. 182 00:10:40,048 --> 00:10:41,982 Does this look like your home? 183 00:10:42,050 --> 00:10:44,883 Do you see rats and roaches and an eviction sign somewhere? 184 00:10:46,254 --> 00:10:48,188 I didn't think so. 185 00:10:48,256 --> 00:10:50,451 Come in here like Buffy and Jody out of the projects. 186 00:10:51,459 --> 00:10:54,019 There you go. I'm so sorry. 187 00:10:54,095 --> 00:10:57,496 They're usually very well behaved children. Just a little mischievous... 188 00:10:57,565 --> 00:10:59,863 - like their mom! - Mm-hmm. 189 00:10:59,935 --> 00:11:01,869 Uh, well, that is so heartwarming... 190 00:11:01,937 --> 00:11:05,304 it makes me want to get pregnant and go through nine hours of labor... 191 00:11:05,373 --> 00:11:07,307 just so I can know what you talkin' about. 192 00:11:07,375 --> 00:11:10,276 But, um, if your little angels are so well behaved... 193 00:11:10,345 --> 00:11:14,839 why come they runnin' round here like they at a special at Kmart or something? 194 00:11:14,916 --> 00:11:17,248 Oh, my God. Come on, children. Let's get out of here. 195 00:11:17,319 --> 00:11:20,186 I don't want you around somebody with such a funky attitude. 196 00:11:20,255 --> 00:11:23,850 Oh, no, 'cause I will snatch you and your kids! 197 00:11:23,925 --> 00:11:27,383 Hey! Can... Can we get on with this? 198 00:11:27,462 --> 00:11:31,865 Excuse me, but for your information, my name is not "Hey." 199 00:11:31,933 --> 00:11:34,561 If you can read, the name tag says "LaShawn." 200 00:11:34,636 --> 00:11:36,968 If you have a problem with that, see my supervisor. 201 00:11:37,038 --> 00:11:41,065 And if you lookin' for some hay, I suggest you go check the stable. 202 00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:47,108 Look at this artwork. The texture is just so lifelike. 203 00:11:47,182 --> 00:11:49,810 Wow. It's amazing how they make this in such detail. 204 00:11:49,884 --> 00:11:52,216 And just what are you doing? 205 00:11:52,287 --> 00:11:55,256 Oh, I'm just trying to get a better feel of the texture. 206 00:11:55,323 --> 00:11:57,450 - This is an incredible piece of work. - Mm-hmm. 207 00:11:57,525 --> 00:11:59,459 Mm-hmm. Well, that's cool and everything. 208 00:11:59,527 --> 00:12:02,963 I'm sure scientists from all over the world are just dyin' to come over here... 209 00:12:03,031 --> 00:12:05,966 and do research on your incredible sense of touch. 210 00:12:06,034 --> 00:12:09,231 But, um, as far as our policy goes here... 211 00:12:09,304 --> 00:12:11,568 Uh..." Nice to look at, nice to hold. 212 00:12:11,639 --> 00:12:14,233 If you break it, consider it sold." 213 00:12:14,309 --> 00:12:16,573 Now, on the next part of the tour... 214 00:12:16,644 --> 00:12:19,340 you're gonna be seein' some Hopi Native American art... 215 00:12:19,414 --> 00:12:23,578 um, basic pottery, everyday hunting tools, religious artifacts... 216 00:12:23,651 --> 00:12:28,145 - all from sacred burial grounds approximately 400 years old. - Wow! 217 00:12:28,223 --> 00:12:30,282 - Great. I can't wait to see that. - Me neither. 218 00:12:30,358 --> 00:12:33,623 Mm-hmm. Well, you gonna have to, 'cause it's time for my lunch break. 219 00:12:33,695 --> 00:12:36,687 Uh, if you care to wait, I'll be back in 35 minutes... 220 00:12:36,765 --> 00:12:39,359 and if not, have a nice day. 221 00:12:43,505 --> 00:12:45,837 ♪♪ [Hip-hop] 222 00:13:26,714 --> 00:13:29,046 How is it going, Dr. Ito? 223 00:13:29,117 --> 00:13:31,483 Wonderful. Another few days collecting data... 224 00:13:31,553 --> 00:13:33,487 and we'll have the cure for cancer. 225 00:13:33,555 --> 00:13:35,614 Something's showing up on the radar. 226 00:13:35,690 --> 00:13:37,624 Looks like it's right outside the ship. 227 00:13:37,692 --> 00:13:40,388 Viewing screen! 228 00:13:40,462 --> 00:13:44,796 Hey! Think you could let me in? 229 00:13:44,866 --> 00:13:47,994 Air's startin' to get a little thin out here. 230 00:13:48,069 --> 00:13:51,436 Danger! Danger! Dr. Smith, Dr. Smith! 231 00:13:51,506 --> 00:13:53,667 Oh, my God! 232 00:13:53,741 --> 00:13:55,971 Open up the space pad. 233 00:13:56,044 --> 00:13:57,978 [Beeps] 234 00:14:01,583 --> 00:14:04,711 Hi! Howdy, folks! Fire Marshal Bill here. 235 00:14:04,786 --> 00:14:08,779 Ya know, you antigravity geeks are due for a little safety investigation. 236 00:14:08,857 --> 00:14:13,419 - Well, uh, let me be the first to welcome you aboard. - Thank you, son. 237 00:14:13,495 --> 00:14:17,192 That's a nice mustache you got there. Had one like it myself. 238 00:14:17,265 --> 00:14:20,826 Then one day I put my cigar in backwards and... Boom! 239 00:14:20,902 --> 00:14:22,927 My lip went up like a tinderbox. 240 00:14:23,004 --> 00:14:25,234 - But I don't smoke. - None of us do. 241 00:14:25,306 --> 00:14:27,934 And I'm sure you'll find that our ship is... 242 00:14:28,009 --> 00:14:30,500 the safest outpost in the galaxy. 243 00:14:30,578 --> 00:14:34,105 That's what they said when I inspected the Titanic, but I showed 'em different. 244 00:14:34,182 --> 00:14:36,446 Unsinkable, my good eye! 245 00:14:37,819 --> 00:14:39,810 - [Bubbling] - Uh-oh. 246 00:14:41,890 --> 00:14:44,051 What's goin' on over here, Princess Leia? 247 00:14:44,125 --> 00:14:46,389 It is a refrigeration experiment. 248 00:14:46,461 --> 00:14:50,921 We're freezing this produce with liquid nitrogen. 249 00:14:50,999 --> 00:14:54,025 Well, that's fine and dandy, but remember... 250 00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:57,265 in space, no one can hear ya scream. 251 00:14:57,338 --> 00:14:59,533 Let me tell ya somethin'! 252 00:14:59,607 --> 00:15:02,576 Let's just say you're gettin' ready to freeze some veggies... 253 00:15:02,644 --> 00:15:05,613 and you mistake your hand for a stalk of celery. 254 00:15:05,680 --> 00:15:08,308 - [Sizzling] - ♪ La, la-la la-la, la ♪ 255 00:15:08,383 --> 00:15:12,183 ♪ La, la-la, la-la Mother of God ♪♪ 256 00:15:12,253 --> 00:15:16,212 Then you go to hang your autographed picture of Chewbacca... 257 00:15:16,291 --> 00:15:18,452 and the next thing you know... 258 00:15:21,829 --> 00:15:25,458 The Iceman Cometh.! [Laughing] 259 00:15:27,101 --> 00:15:31,697 [Smacking Lips] Gee, that demonstration left me a little parched. 260 00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:37,975 [Ito] Don't drink that! That jar contains aliens! 261 00:15:41,082 --> 00:15:43,414 So that's how they're gettin' over the border. 262 00:15:43,484 --> 00:15:47,284 Hey, you! Come on out and show me your green card! 263 00:15:47,355 --> 00:15:50,847 Oh, my God! One of them is missing! [Panting] 264 00:15:50,925 --> 00:15:53,758 Hmm. I wonder where it could be. 265 00:15:55,330 --> 00:15:57,389 [Screaming] 266 00:15:59,734 --> 00:16:02,862 Hi! Howdy, folks! [Laughs] 267 00:16:02,937 --> 00:16:06,873 Don't touch him! He's got my eyes! 268 00:16:10,078 --> 00:16:13,047 - Are you all right? - Are ya joking? 269 00:16:13,114 --> 00:16:16,208 I've had more parasites livin' off me than Eddie Murphy. 270 00:16:16,284 --> 00:16:18,844 [Snickering] 271 00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:22,447 Alert! Alert! There's an alien roaming free on board! 272 00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:24,889 Speakin' of roaming free... 273 00:16:24,959 --> 00:16:27,621 how come these seats don't have safety belts? 274 00:16:27,695 --> 00:16:30,255 We don't need 'em. This ship is perfectly safe. 275 00:16:30,331 --> 00:16:32,731 I beg to differ, Buck Rogers! 276 00:16:32,800 --> 00:16:35,792 What if one of your fellow astronauts is a frustrated soprano? 277 00:16:35,870 --> 00:16:39,897 He's in the shower. He breaks into a high note from Figaro. 278 00:16:39,974 --> 00:16:42,465 ♪♪ [High Note] 279 00:16:46,481 --> 00:16:49,939 [Shouting] Hit the panel seal! 280 00:16:50,018 --> 00:16:52,179 - Hit the panel seal! - [Ito] I got it! 281 00:16:54,622 --> 00:16:57,113 We've lost Dr. Jones! 282 00:16:57,191 --> 00:16:59,682 But we've learned a valuable lesson. 283 00:16:59,761 --> 00:17:02,127 Buckle up for safety! 284 00:17:02,196 --> 00:17:04,528 Well, burn my bridgework. 285 00:17:04,599 --> 00:17:06,726 Is that a self-destruct sequencer? 286 00:17:06,801 --> 00:17:09,269 When was the last time you had that baby tested? 287 00:17:09,337 --> 00:17:10,861 Please don't touch that. 288 00:17:10,938 --> 00:17:13,338 You know, a gadget like that can be handy... 289 00:17:13,408 --> 00:17:17,572 but it can also lead to a very unpleasant total... 290 00:17:17,645 --> 00:17:19,636 demise! 291 00:17:19,714 --> 00:17:22,706 Let's just say you're sleepwalking one night... 292 00:17:22,784 --> 00:17:25,719 and you're dreaming Darth Vader just told ya he's your father. 293 00:17:25,787 --> 00:17:28,153 Naturally, you're completely suicidal... 294 00:17:28,222 --> 00:17:31,714 and you program the computer to start the final countdown like so. 295 00:17:31,793 --> 00:17:34,125 Oops. 296 00:17:34,195 --> 00:17:37,961 [Male Electronic Voice #1] The station will self-destruct in 20 seconds. 297 00:17:38,032 --> 00:17:40,660 - Nineteen, 18... - You idiot! 298 00:17:40,735 --> 00:17:43,465 - Everyone, into the shuttle! - 17, 16... 299 00:17:43,538 --> 00:17:47,133 [Male Electronic Voice #2] Please remain calm. He is a fire marshal. 300 00:17:47,208 --> 00:17:51,235 Thank you, HAL. Ya see, HAL knows... 301 00:17:51,312 --> 00:17:54,907 that all I have to do is use the main computer override key. 302 00:17:54,982 --> 00:17:56,916 [Male Electronic Voice #1] Nine... 303 00:17:56,984 --> 00:17:59,475 Now, if I could only remember which one it is. 304 00:17:59,554 --> 00:18:02,182 Seven, six... 305 00:18:02,256 --> 00:18:05,953 - Not that one. - five, four... 306 00:18:06,027 --> 00:18:09,428 - Wrong again. - three... 307 00:18:09,497 --> 00:18:12,227 - Oh, yeah. This is it! - two, one... 308 00:18:12,300 --> 00:18:14,461 [Explosion] 309 00:18:18,039 --> 00:18:20,701 A lifetime of work... 310 00:18:20,775 --> 00:18:23,539 Gone. All gone. 311 00:18:24,545 --> 00:18:26,638 They can put a man on the moon... 312 00:18:26,714 --> 00:18:29,547 but they can't protect us from ourselves. 313 00:18:31,652 --> 00:18:34,212 [Exhales] 314 00:18:34,288 --> 00:18:36,916 Feels good to have the sun on my face! 315 00:18:36,991 --> 00:18:39,357 Course I'd rather have my face on the sun. 316 00:18:39,427 --> 00:18:41,861 Hey, let me show ya somethin'! 317 00:18:41,929 --> 00:18:44,090 [Together] No! 318 00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:47,101 [Explosion] 319 00:18:47,101 --> 00:18:47,658 [Explosion] 320 00:18:47,735 --> 00:18:50,602 - Please welcome... - From First Priority Records... 321 00:18:50,671 --> 00:18:53,936 - Performing "Poor Georgie"... - [Together] M.C. Lyte. 322 00:19:04,185 --> 00:19:06,153 ♪ I met him in a club hangin' out one night ♪ 323 00:19:06,220 --> 00:19:08,814 ♪ He said, Hello, I'm George Hi, Lyte ♪ 324 00:19:08,890 --> 00:19:11,381 ♪ How's everything going, huh How ya doin' ♪ 325 00:19:11,459 --> 00:19:14,292 ♪ Hope everything's fine Ooh and aah ♪ 326 00:19:14,362 --> 00:19:16,830 ♪ Can I call you sometime Can I get the digits ♪ 327 00:19:16,898 --> 00:19:18,957 ♪ And the address so I can come visit ♪ 328 00:19:19,033 --> 00:19:21,467 ♪ I gave him the digits That wasn't a problem ♪ 329 00:19:21,536 --> 00:19:24,027 ♪ 'Cause if he caused any I would have to solve them ♪ 330 00:19:24,105 --> 00:19:26,471 ♪ 'Cause George looked good Mm, damn good ♪ 331 00:19:26,541 --> 00:19:29,009 ♪ And in my mind I knew he would ♪ 332 00:19:29,076 --> 00:19:31,510 ♪ In my mind I hoped for the best ♪ 333 00:19:31,579 --> 00:19:34,013 ♪ Convincing myself that this was not a test ♪ 334 00:19:34,081 --> 00:19:36,572 ♪ 'Cause I heard many things about Georgie ♪ 335 00:19:36,651 --> 00:19:39,142 ♪ Nothing kinky, like no orgy ♪ 336 00:19:39,220 --> 00:19:41,620 ♪ I heard he knows how to make love ♪ 337 00:19:41,689 --> 00:19:43,884 ♪ Like an angel from the heaven above ♪ 338 00:19:43,958 --> 00:19:46,620 ♪ Who was I kiddin' I'd give him a try ♪ 339 00:19:46,694 --> 00:19:49,595 ♪ 'Cause Lyte needs love too and that ain't no lie ♪ 340 00:19:49,664 --> 00:19:51,723 ♪ Keep your ears open Hope that you're listening ♪ 341 00:19:51,799 --> 00:19:54,529 ♪ 'Cause I'm about to take you on a Georgie Porgie mission ♪ 342 00:19:54,602 --> 00:19:57,594 ♪ Can it be I stayed away too long ♪ 343 00:19:59,440 --> 00:20:02,568 ♪ Can it be I stayed away too long ♪ 344 00:20:04,245 --> 00:20:06,713 ♪ I gave him the digits I saw it in his eyes ♪ 345 00:20:06,781 --> 00:20:09,341 ♪ She gave me the number Hmm, I'm surprised ♪ 346 00:20:09,417 --> 00:20:11,817 ♪ Good conversation over the phone ♪ 347 00:20:11,886 --> 00:20:14,354 ♪ He begin to comfort me whenever I was alone ♪ 348 00:20:14,422 --> 00:20:16,754 ♪ George was sweet so nice and so neat ♪ 349 00:20:16,824 --> 00:20:19,315 ♪ With any other guy he didn't have to compete ♪ 350 00:20:19,393 --> 00:20:21,827 ♪ George was mature He made sure ♪ 351 00:20:21,896 --> 00:20:24,524 ♪ That he was the only man I'd ever adore ♪ 352 00:20:24,599 --> 00:20:26,999 ♪ Girls, have you ever had a friend ♪ 353 00:20:27,068 --> 00:20:29,366 ♪ That ya get wit' every now and then ♪ 354 00:20:29,437 --> 00:20:31,928 ♪ I know for a fact George had a lot of girls ♪ 355 00:20:32,006 --> 00:20:34,406 ♪ Spread out from state to state around the world ♪ 356 00:20:34,475 --> 00:20:36,807 ♪ As long as he was smart and kept his girls in check ♪ 357 00:20:36,878 --> 00:20:39,210 ♪ Made sure I never saw them and showed me respect ♪ 358 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:41,714 ♪ He didn't have to be loyal like men should be ♪ 359 00:20:41,782 --> 00:20:44,410 ♪ I don't care about the other girls Just be good to me ♪ 360 00:20:44,485 --> 00:20:46,817 ♪ But if I ever saw one that would be the end ♪ 361 00:20:46,888 --> 00:20:49,618 ♪ He couldn't kick the sorry lie that she was just a friend ♪ 362 00:20:49,690 --> 00:20:51,851 ♪ The girls, I didn't care If I ask, don't lie ♪ 363 00:20:51,926 --> 00:20:54,918 ♪ See, 'cause Georgie was into makin' young girls cry ♪ 364 00:20:54,996 --> 00:20:57,021 ♪ Kissed the girls and made them cry ♪ 365 00:20:57,098 --> 00:20:59,589 ♪ Kissed the girls and made them cry ♪ 366 00:20:59,667 --> 00:21:02,067 ♪ Kissed the girls and made them cry ♪ 367 00:21:02,136 --> 00:21:04,400 ♪ Kissed the girls and made them cry ♪ 368 00:21:04,472 --> 00:21:07,270 - ♪ Kissed the girls and made them cry ♪ - ♪ Can it be I stayed away ♪ 369 00:21:07,341 --> 00:21:09,571 - ♪ Too long ♪ - ♪ Kissed the girls and made them cry ♪ 370 00:21:09,644 --> 00:21:12,238 - ♪ Kissed the girls and made them cry ♪ - ♪ Can it be I stayed away ♪ 371 00:21:12,313 --> 00:21:14,804 - ♪ Too long ♪ - ♪ Kissed the girls and made...♪ 372 00:21:14,882 --> 00:21:17,146 ♪ George was clean No drugs and such ♪ 373 00:21:17,218 --> 00:21:19,686 ♪ But once in a while he'd drink too much ♪ 374 00:21:19,754 --> 00:21:22,222 ♪ Hangin' in a club where they played rockers ♪ 375 00:21:22,290 --> 00:21:24,520 ♪ Him and his friend drinkin' vodka ♪ 376 00:21:24,592 --> 00:21:26,924 ♪ I was lookin' for him and I found him there ♪ 377 00:21:26,994 --> 00:21:29,462 ♪ With his clothes messed up and his messed-up hair ♪ 378 00:21:29,530 --> 00:21:31,862 ♪ I told him he was messin'up He wouldn't go far♪ 379 00:21:31,933 --> 00:21:34,731 ♪ He got mad and asked his friend for the keys to the car ♪ 380 00:21:34,802 --> 00:21:37,270 ♪ I said, Don't drive Use your head ♪ 381 00:21:37,338 --> 00:21:39,806 ♪ Drive while you're drunk and you kill yourself dead ♪ 382 00:21:39,874 --> 00:21:42,206 ♪ We begin to argue Bad words were said ♪ 383 00:21:42,276 --> 00:21:45,268 ♪ Then he got kicked out by some long-haired dread ♪ 384 00:21:45,346 --> 00:21:47,280 ♪ Ran into the car as if in a hurry ♪ 385 00:21:47,348 --> 00:21:49,816 ♪ Started the car but his vision was blurry ♪ 386 00:21:49,884 --> 00:21:52,682 ♪ He didn't care He drove off into the night ♪ 387 00:21:52,753 --> 00:21:54,880 ♪ Riding for miles without his headlights ♪ 388 00:21:54,956 --> 00:21:57,322 ♪ Georgie Porgie had too much on his mind ♪ 389 00:21:57,391 --> 00:21:59,859 ♪ He was still young yet running out of time ♪ 390 00:21:59,927 --> 00:22:02,418 ♪ Last week he took tests and the doctor told him ♪ 391 00:22:02,496 --> 00:22:04,987 ♪ George had cancer in his lungs and his colon ♪ 392 00:22:05,066 --> 00:22:07,591 ♪ See, when he was 12 he started smokin' ♪ 393 00:22:07,668 --> 00:22:10,330 ♪ Paid no attention when he started chokin' ♪ 394 00:22:10,404 --> 00:22:12,531 ♪ Thoughts flashed through his head There they stuck ♪ 395 00:22:12,607 --> 00:22:14,939 ♪ Till Georgie Porgie crashed into a truck ♪ 396 00:22:15,009 --> 00:22:17,443 ♪ I wish I would've told him I liked him so much ♪ 397 00:22:17,511 --> 00:22:20,344 ♪ How he made me feel with the slightest touch ♪ 398 00:22:20,414 --> 00:22:22,541 ♪ Now he's gone and I can't tell him nothin' ♪ 399 00:22:22,617 --> 00:22:25,017 ♪ Wish he was here so I could say somethin' ♪ 400 00:22:25,086 --> 00:22:27,577 ♪ Story is not to say that I'm in sorrow ♪ 401 00:22:27,655 --> 00:22:30,055 ♪Just to say no one is promised tomorrow ♪ 402 00:22:30,124 --> 00:22:32,456 ♪ If you love someone you should say it often ♪ 403 00:22:32,526 --> 00:22:34,892 ♪ You never know when they'll be laying in a coffin ♪ 404 00:22:34,962 --> 00:22:37,294 ♪ Wake up, It's important that you know ♪ 405 00:22:37,365 --> 00:22:40,334 ♪ That no one on Earth is promised tomorrow ♪ 406 00:22:40,401 --> 00:22:42,460 ♪ Tomorrow, tomorrow tomorrow, tomorrow ♪ 407 00:22:42,536 --> 00:22:47,030 ♪ Believe that and don't think that it can't happen to you ♪♪ 36064

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