Original subtitles

♪ There is more to life Than what you're living ♪

♪ So take a chance And face the wind ♪

♪ An open road And a road that's hidden ♪

♪ A brand-new life Around the bend ♪

♪ There were times ♪

♪ I lost a dream or two ♪

♪ Found the trail ♪

♪ And at the end was you ♪

♪ There's a path we take And a path not taken ♪

♪ The choice is up to you My friend ♪

♪ Nights are long But you might awaken ♪

♪ To a brand-new life Brand-new life ♪

♪ Brand-new life Around the bend ♪♪

Mother...

How's the short story coming?

I can't think of anything to write about.

Well, write about life, or someone you know.

Observe something, Mother.

The sexy, sultry blond rose from the couch

and slithered across the room.

Is it too late to drop the course?

Actually, she wasn't all that sexy.

She's wasn't all that sultry,

and it was even doubtful she was a blond.

Mother!

Oh... Oh, I know I'm late, I know I'm late,

but I got all the errands done, and look.

I even got a wreath.

That's terrific, Tony, but where's the...

Firewood? I got the firewood.

Firewood.

That's great, but what about...?

Dinner? I got dinner. Chinese food.

Children.

The children are gonna love this.

I forgot the kids!

I'm out of here.

Mother,

do you think Tony's been acting peculiar?

Oh, Angela. It's easy to forget the kids.

They're small.

It's not just today.

He's been preoccupied all week. He's out almost every night.

I had to plan my eggnog party

around his schedule.

These are the times that try men's souls.

Here they are. Kids.

He's forgetful, but he's fast.

We got a ride home with Mrs. McCarthy.

Yeah, I told her my Dad didn't care about me anymore.

What are you talking about?

I got Chinese food, a double order of ribs.

He cares, he cares.

Hey, listen, uh, I can't stay for dinner.

I've got to go out. Again?

Well, yeah. It's Christmas time, right?

Well, I know, but... But tomorrow,

tomorrow, I'll stay home, I promise.

I'll make scampi à la Tony, the best. I promise.

But I need you to stay with the kids tonight.

I have to go Christmas shopping.

But Angela... Tony, I'll cover for you.

I love Chinese. It's my only vice.

Well, at least it goes well with the others.

Mona, you're the best.

I love you. Bye, sweetheart.

No, no, I don't kiss you.

Hey, Agatha Christie. How you doing?

Great.

Someone is killing off all the gardeners

in a small Connecticut town.

The police are stumped,

the town is paralyzed with fear,

and all the lawns are going to seed.

Oh, Mona. That's chilling, Mona, chilling.

Our only hope lies with our heroine,

a sexy, red-headed grandmother

whose detective skills are only surpassed

by her incredible body.

And I think... the housekeeper did it.

What? This?

Ah, fresh gardener's blood.

You got me, Mona.

I caught him fooling around with my begonias.

Mm, mm, mm, mm.

This is not gardener's blood.

This is tomato sauce, and you smell like pepperoni.

You got it, Mona.

Listen, I gotta get that kitchen cleaned

before Angela comes home.

Aha! And what is this?

Yet another clue.

Pizza Playland. Are you working th...?

Tony, are you moonlighting?

Hey, look, Dick Tracy, you got me, all right?

I, uh... I just needed some extra money, that's all.

Why?

Mother, open up!

Stall her. I gotta get that kitchen cleaned.

I'm coming, I'm coming. Mother!

Hold your horses!

Oh, well, it cost me a bundle,

but I got something wonderful for all my employees.

Scrooge.

Mother, what are you talking about?

Tony...

is holding down another job at night

because you don't pay him enough

to even buy Christmas presents for his little girl.

Humbug, Mother.

I just gave him a nice Christmas bonus.

He's working a night job? Why?

I don't know, but he said he needed the money.

You don't think he's in trouble, do you?

I don't know, but I'm going to find out.

Do you have a plan?

I'm going to ask him.

Angela, you wouldn't last five minutes at Scotland Yard.

Look, I know I'm late, but I got the money.

I promise I'll be there Saturday morning.

I'll be there. Okay.

Tony...

Hi. Oh, I'm just setting the table for breakfast.

You know me.

Always one step ahead of the game.

Tony, Mother told me what you're doing.

Angela, do I look like the kind of guy

that kills gardeners? Come on.

No, but you look like a guy who's working two jobs.

Oh, that.

Look, I know I've been out of the house a lot lately,

but only at night,

and I'm still doing a good job here, right?

Well, you did put the red towels in the wash

with Jonathan's white shorts.

But nowadays, I mean, uh...

it's cool for guys to wear pink, huh?

Angela, I don't know...

Tony, are you in some kind of trouble?

Do you owe someone money?

Angela, look,

thanks for your concern, but this is kind of personal.

I mean, you're going to have to give me some space on this one.

Oh, of course, Tony.

I hope you don't think that I was prying.

Oh, no, no, no.

It's just if you need anything...

Legal advice, maybe?

Angela, thank you, but, no, okay?

Okay. Gambling debts?

Are they after you?

Who's "they"?

You know, "them."

People who talk like this.

You mean guys with laryngitis?

Oh, hi.

It's gorgeous out. What a day.

I'm in a wonderful mood.

Me too. I just paid all my December bills.

Good for you. Uh-huh.

Listen, I'm going to run down to the corner mailbox,

and drop these off. Oh, you forgot one.

No, that one's gotta be there today.

I'm gonna deliver that myself.

Ah, I see.

Hello.

Hi, Mother. How are you?

Don't change the subject. What about Tony?

Did you talk to him last night?

I did.

He said it was personal, and I didn't pry.

What good are you?

Mother... Whatever it is,

he's going to take care of it today...

with that envelope.

Oh... No, no, no, Mother.

It's really none of our business.

No, right. You're right.

Right. You're absolutely right.

G.F. Lipari.

Who could G.F. Lipari be?

God Father Lipari.

Oh!

Angela, I've got great news!

Well, I'm glad you do, Mother.

I've got 62 employees and 61 presents.

So, what's the big deal?

Fire someone.

That's the Christmas spirit, Mother.

Angela, I found out today that Tony is not in trouble.

He's not?

That's wonderful. How do you know?

Well, elementary, my dear Angela.

I went for a little ride today,

and I just happened to find myself in Brooklyn,

in Tony's old neighborhood, actually.

Mother, you followed him?

I know.

I almost lost him.

I couldn't find a parking space.

But Mona Robinson never loses her man.

I got there just in time to see Tony duck into a building,

and I followed him...

up to the third floor.

And there she was,

a beautiful, dark-haired woman...

G.F. Lipari.

Mother, what are you saying?

Oh, Angela, take it out of neutral.

He's keeping a woman! Shh!

He's keeping a woman.

Isn't it wonderful?

And all this time, we thought he was in trouble.

He's keeping a woman?

I am rearranging my life for him

so he can fool around with some Flatbush floozy?

♪ With a floy-floy... ♪

Stop it!

Hey, Mona. I'm glad you're here.

You gonna stick around for some real good scampi?

The best I ever made.

That's terrific. Yeah.

I've rearranged my eggnog party to accommodate you.

I have sent my son to school in pink underwear, and why?

I give up.

So you could sneak down your back alleys

to some torrid tryst with a Neapolitan nymphet.

Sounds so romantic.

Yeah. It sounds great. Where do I sign on?

What are you talking about?

Do you deny that you were in Brooklyn this afternoon?

What if I was?

With a check for a certain Miss G.F. Lipari?

Hey! What, are you two tailing me?

When did you turn into Cagney and Lacey?

Your little peccadillo

is beginning to affect my household.

I think I deserve an explanation.

Okay. You want an explanation?

Mister Lipari is my father's landlord.

I've been paying the rent on his apartment.

And what about the mysterious dark-haired woman?

That's the mysterious dark-haired daughter

of Mr. Lipari.

Oops.

Boy, Angela, you were way off on this one.

The guy raised the rent on me,

so with Christmas coming on,

I didn't know if I could make it,

but I did, okay?

Okay. That's very commendable.

Thank you. You're welcome.

Dinner will be served in five minutes.

Hey, Angela. Yes?

You thought...? Well, I...

Try to get your mind out of the gutter, all right?

This is all your fault.

Oh, Angela. Why lay blame?

Angela, I have a terrific idea.

Forget it.

Why don't we invite Tony's father here

for Christmas, huh?

It's Tony and Samantha's first Christmas in Connecticut.

Wouldn't it be nice

if they had some family with them, hm?

Well, it is a good idea, Mother...

even if it is yours.

I know it, I know it, I know it.

All right, I'll go ask. Oh, good.

Mom, look!

Oh, sweetheart, that's wonderful.

I told you she wouldn't know what it was.

Sam, come here. Come sit down.

Honey, how would you like it

if your Grandfather Micelli came to spend Christmas with us?

That would be great, Angela.

But I think you're a little late.

Oh, does he already have plans?

No.

He's been dead for over a year.

Well, you were way off on this one too, Angela.

Tony, I, uh... I kind of asked Samantha

if, uh, your father wanted to come here

and spend Christmas with us.

Yeah? What'd she say?

Well, uh, she didn't think he could make it.

No?

You know, he's... He's dead.

That was her reason too.

Tony, this may be none of my business,

but it seems a little unusual

to keep paying rent for someone who, well,

isn't really in the position

to appreciate it.

Hey, look, Angela.

The apartment is, uh...

It's no big mystery. I mean...

Finding a place in the city is rough,

so I'm hanging on to this one

just in case things don't work out

with me and you living together.

Not that me and you are

"living together" living together.

Well, how do you think things are working

with you and me not "living together"?

Oh, terrific. Great. Why? Don't you think so?

Oh, no complaints here.

Hey, you tried the rest. Now you've got the best.

Why don't you let the apartment go?

I will, I will... Soon as I get it cleaned out.

Well, Tony, I know that it's tough

to clean out a place

after someone, you know...

Dies.

Right, that.

I remember when Daddy... Died. Right.

Mother and I went and cleaned out his office.

Oh, I used to love that place.

He had a big mahogany desk and a view of the city.

Yeah? That's funny.

My old man had a view of the city too.

Right from the back of the old garbage truck.

He was a garbage man?

Yeah. Right on the block where I lived.

He loved that job.

I don't know, somehow he made it great.

Whew, man.

Tony, what about the place?

I'll get it done. I've just been busy.

Would you like to take the day off tomorrow?

Tony?

Angela?

Uh, hold on.

Hi.

Hi. How's it going?

Oh, I'm just packing up a storm.

Uh, what are you doing here?

Well, I left work early,

and I thought you might need some help.

Yeah. Come on in.

Thank you. Ooh.

So... This is where your father, uh...

Lived.

Right. Well...

You know, Tony, I always find

that sometimes, at times like this, it helps

if somebody comes and helps you.

You know, like, somebody who doesn't really have

an emotional attachment to these things. Oh, I'm sorry.

Oh! Oh, my God. Tony, I'm really sorry.

It's all right. Angela, it's okay.

Tony! Oh, no! No!

Angela, this is from the fireplace!

Oh! Oh! Oh...

My father's safe and sound in the Jamaica Avenue Cemetery.

Oh. Right. I knew that.

Well, uh, it looks like slow going around here.

Yeah, well...

My father had a lot of, uh, stuff.

Hey, speaking of stuff.

See this ball?

This ball is signed by all the '62 Mets.

There, look.

"Marvelous" Marv Throneberry,

Choo Choo Coleman...

My old man

was the biggest Mets fan that ever existed.

You know, he was the one

who got me interested in baseball

in the first place.

He must have been so proud of you

when you made it in the major leagues.

Proud? He was dancing in the streets.

You know, I remember

when I came to town with the Cards, you know...

My father took out a whole section

of the right-field bleachers.

He brought everybody he knew,

and some guys he just met in the parking lot.

You could hear him chanting all the way down to the dugout.

You know, "Tony, Tony, Tony."

Yeah, I was so nervous

I struck out the first three times I came to the plate.

Then I come up in the ninth, you know.

It's two on. There's one out.

I hear him chanting, "Tony, Tony, Tony."

You hit him a home run, didn't you?

I ground into a double play.

Ah, but Dad was happy.

I mean, hey, his kid was playing in the majors,

and the Mets finally won a game.

You must miss him.

Yeah, I miss him a lot.

There... There's a Christmas tree.

You weren't planning on spending Christmas here,

were you?

That's from, uh...

That's from last year. Uh...

My father died kind of sudden,

right before Christmas, you know.

My present's still under the tree.

It's been a year.

Don't you think you want to open it?

Yeah, I guess.

You know, he always said I was late for everything.

I guess this time he was right.

Come on. You can do it.

It's his pocket watch.

I get the hint.

Oh, it's just beautiful.

Oh, there's an inscription. Look.

"To my 14-karat son."

Angela, I don't think I can handle this.

Tony,

you've locked your father's memory away

in this apartment for a year.

Why don't you give him a break?

Come on.

Take him back to Connecticut so he can be with his family.

Tony, I think this should just about do it.

Here, let me get...

No, no, don't! It's heavy. It's really heavy.

Well, it's not so much heavy as it is clumsy.

Tony, that's a great record collection.

Yeah, huh? My old man was a sucker

for these big bands, you know.

Yeah, look. Tommy Dorsey.

There's Glenn Miller.

Les Brown and his Band of Renown.

You should have seen my old man do the Lindy.

What are you going to do with all these records?

I don't know.

I mean, I guess I could give them

to some retirement home,

or something like that, huh?

I mean, this is pretty cornball stuff.

Right. But, uh, I love it.

You do? So do I.

You do?

Yeah. So that means I could take them home

and we'd play them all the time?

Samantha and Jonathan'll hate us.

I think that's the way it's supposed to be.

Well... I guess this is it.

Yeah, Monday morning the Salvation Army comes

and cleans the rest of this stuff out.

Right.

You know, uh...

my old man lived here 15 years.

Now all it is is a room full of... old furniture.

Tony, why don't I take this suitcase down

and I'll wait for you in the van.

Angela... Thank you.

You're welcome.

Well, that is the end of the presents,

thank heavens.

Did everybody get what they wanted?

Thanks, Dad.

Merry Christmas, sweetheart.

Hey, Mona, how about you?

Did Santa treat you good this year?

Too soon to tell.

He's meeting me at my place later.

I have an idea.

How about a little Christmas music?

Mom, what are you doing?

I'm doing the Lindy, honey.

Yeah, you call that the Lindy?

I'll show you how to Lindy.

Dad, don't you dare! Oh...

Okay, come on, punkers. It's Christmas. Let's rock.