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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:12,034 --> 00:00:13,867 ( mooing ) 2 00:00:13,969 --> 00:00:15,568 ( nervous chatter ) 3 00:00:16,405 --> 00:00:18,004 ( mooing ) 4 00:00:21,009 --> 00:00:22,108 DON'T WORRY, EVERYONE. 5 00:00:22,210 --> 00:00:25,244 I'LL SHOOT 'ER DOWN WITH MY ASSAULT RIFLE. 6 00:00:27,581 --> 00:00:28,981 MOVE OVER ! 7 00:00:29,083 --> 00:00:30,216 I'LL HANDLE THIS. 8 00:00:30,317 --> 00:00:33,319 DANG, I REALLY WANTED TO SHOOT SOMETHIN'. 9 00:00:33,421 --> 00:00:35,154 ( grunting ) 10 00:00:40,260 --> 00:00:41,725 LOOK OUT ! 11 00:00:41,827 --> 00:00:43,861 COW IN DANGER. 12 00:00:53,972 --> 00:00:55,005 HUH ? 13 00:00:55,107 --> 00:00:57,740 YOU'RE NOT A REAL COW. 14 00:00:57,842 --> 00:00:58,774 ( beeping ) 15 00:00:58,876 --> 00:01:00,475 "SURPRISE STRIPPERELLA. 16 00:01:00,578 --> 00:01:02,978 "YOU'RE DEAD" ? 17 00:01:03,080 --> 00:01:05,547 ( beeping ) 18 00:01:11,922 --> 00:01:15,122 STUNTMAN SUPPLIES, CRASHPADS. 19 00:01:17,392 --> 00:01:18,925 STUNT MAN SUPPLIES ? 20 00:01:19,027 --> 00:01:22,729 SHOULDN'T IT BE "STUNT PERSON" SUPPLIES ? 21 00:01:26,534 --> 00:01:28,935 ( mooing ) 22 00:01:49,488 --> 00:01:52,256 ♪ Stripperella ♪ 23 00:01:53,760 --> 00:01:56,759 ♪ Stripperella ♪ 24 00:02:11,976 --> 00:02:13,308 I HAD THE WORST NIGHTMARE. 25 00:02:13,410 --> 00:02:15,409 I WAS GIVING A SPEECH IN FRONT OF ALL THESE PEOPLE 26 00:02:15,511 --> 00:02:17,879 AND THEN I REALIZED I WAS IN MY UNDIES ! 27 00:02:17,981 --> 00:02:20,080 IT WAS SO EMBARRASSING ! 28 00:02:20,182 --> 00:02:21,649 HEY, EROTICA I-- 29 00:02:21,751 --> 00:02:23,651 ( gasps ) 30 00:02:23,753 --> 00:02:25,051 UGH ! 31 00:02:25,154 --> 00:02:26,720 OH, KEVIN, I'M SO SORRY. 32 00:02:26,822 --> 00:02:28,221 I'M JUST REAL JUMPY. 33 00:02:28,323 --> 00:02:30,557 SOMEONE KEEPS TRYING TO KILL ME AND IT'S MAKING ME ON EDGE. 34 00:02:30,659 --> 00:02:32,125 SOMEONE'S TRYING TO KILL YOU ? 35 00:02:32,227 --> 00:02:33,326 NO-- NOT ME. 36 00:02:33,428 --> 00:02:35,394 SOMEONE'S TRYING TO KILL... SOMEONE ELSE 37 00:02:35,496 --> 00:02:37,930 AND IT'S JUST REALLY STRESSING ME OUT. 38 00:02:38,032 --> 00:02:39,632 HEY, EROTICA, YOU GOT A SECOND ? 39 00:02:39,734 --> 00:02:40,966 SURE. 40 00:02:41,068 --> 00:02:44,469 A SECOND... A MINUTE.. A LIFETIME... 41 00:02:45,004 --> 00:02:47,272 NOW, WHY DIDN'T SHE KICK HIS PRIVATES ? 42 00:02:47,374 --> 00:02:49,240 UM, I WAS WONDERING, 43 00:02:49,342 --> 00:02:51,942 HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT DATING SOMEONE YOU WORK WITH ? 44 00:02:52,045 --> 00:02:53,778 UM, I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT. 45 00:02:53,880 --> 00:02:56,346 YOU DON'T THINK IT'S INAPPROPRIATE, 46 00:02:56,449 --> 00:02:57,948 THAT IT COULD GET COMPLICATED ? 47 00:02:58,050 --> 00:03:01,284 NO, IF TWO PEOPLE WANT TO BE TOGETHER THEY SHOULD-- 48 00:03:01,386 --> 00:03:02,152 GUN ! 49 00:03:02,254 --> 00:03:03,453 HI-YAH ! 50 00:03:03,555 --> 00:03:05,888 EROTICA, WHAT IS WITH YOU ?! 51 00:03:05,991 --> 00:03:08,390 THAT'S ONE OF THEM NEW NOVELTY CELL PHONES 52 00:03:08,492 --> 00:03:10,559 IT JUST LOOKS LIKE A GUN ! 53 00:03:10,661 --> 00:03:12,929 SEE ? 54 00:03:13,031 --> 00:03:14,963 I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO ME. 55 00:03:15,065 --> 00:03:17,199 I JUST KEEP OVERREACTING TO EVERYTHING-- 56 00:03:17,301 --> 00:03:17,865 BOMB ! 57 00:03:17,967 --> 00:03:20,368 EVERYBODY DOWN ! 58 00:03:20,470 --> 00:03:21,903 HUH ? 59 00:03:22,005 --> 00:03:23,571 WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR ? 60 00:03:23,673 --> 00:03:26,273 THAT WAS A CAKE FOR MY DAD'S RETIREMENT ! 61 00:03:26,376 --> 00:03:27,608 I'M SO SORRY-- 62 00:03:27,710 --> 00:03:29,076 WELL, YOU SHOULD BE SORRY ! 63 00:03:29,178 --> 00:03:30,244 MY MOTHER BAKED THAT CAKE 64 00:03:30,346 --> 00:03:32,880 RIGHT BEFORE SHE PASSED AWAY ! 65 00:03:35,183 --> 00:03:36,283 SO, WHERE WERE WE ? 66 00:03:36,384 --> 00:03:38,618 UM, MAYBE NOW'S NOT A GOOD TIME. 67 00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:40,586 I SHOULD GET BACK TO THE TUNES. 68 00:03:40,689 --> 00:03:42,555 I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER. 69 00:03:42,657 --> 00:03:43,956 OKAY. 70 00:03:44,058 --> 00:03:45,391 BUT IF IT MEANS ANYTHING, 71 00:03:45,492 --> 00:03:49,427 I DEFINITELY THINK TWO PEOPLE THAT WORK TOGETHER CAN DATE. 72 00:03:49,529 --> 00:03:50,195 UH, EROTICA, MAYBE-- 73 00:03:50,297 --> 00:03:52,431 UHH ! 74 00:03:52,533 --> 00:03:53,765 AHH ! 75 00:03:58,405 --> 00:04:00,337 THE PRESSURE OF LIVING THIS DOUBLE LIFE IS GETTING TO ME. 76 00:04:00,439 --> 00:04:01,873 I FEEL RESPONSIBLE FOR THE ENTIRE WORLD 77 00:04:01,975 --> 00:04:03,174 AND THERE'S A GUY AT WORK I LIKE 78 00:04:03,276 --> 00:04:04,608 AND IT'S IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO GET CLOSE TO ANYBODY 79 00:04:04,709 --> 00:04:06,810 BECAUSE I ALWAYS HAVE TO LIE ABOUT WHO I REALLY AM. 80 00:04:06,912 --> 00:04:08,277 I'M NOT A GOOD LIAR. 81 00:04:08,380 --> 00:04:09,479 THERE ARE ANTS IN MY KITCHEN, 82 00:04:09,581 --> 00:04:11,581 MY TOILET'S MAKING A FUNNY NOISE, 83 00:04:11,683 --> 00:04:15,684 AND ON TOP OF ALL THAT... SOMEONE'S TRYING TO KILL ME. 84 00:04:15,786 --> 00:04:17,319 YOU'RE HOLDING BACK. 85 00:04:17,421 --> 00:04:18,887 IT'S JUST HARD TO GET CLOSE TO SOMEONE. 86 00:04:18,989 --> 00:04:20,890 I WANT TO FALL IN LOVE BUT I FEEL SO GUARDED 87 00:04:20,992 --> 00:04:22,958 BECAUSE OF MY SECRET LIFE. 88 00:04:23,060 --> 00:04:26,827 STRIPPERELLA, I WANT YOU TO SQUEEZE MY BALLS. 89 00:04:26,929 --> 00:04:28,629 EXCUSE ME ? 90 00:04:28,731 --> 00:04:31,099 MY STRESS BALLS. 91 00:04:31,201 --> 00:04:32,533 I'M THINKING OF MARKETING THEM, 92 00:04:32,635 --> 00:04:34,235 BUT I'M STILL TESTING THEM OUT. 93 00:04:34,337 --> 00:04:37,271 HERE, YOU CAN HAVE SOME OF MY "TESTIES". 94 00:04:38,741 --> 00:04:39,939 WHENEVER YOU'RE STRESSED, 95 00:04:40,042 --> 00:04:42,509 I WANT YOU TO CLOSE YOUR EYES TAKE A DEEP BREATH, 96 00:04:42,611 --> 00:04:46,512 AND CHANNEL ALL OF YOUR NEGATIVE ENERGY INTO MY BALLS. 97 00:04:46,615 --> 00:04:49,649 ( panting & grunting ) 98 00:05:08,901 --> 00:05:11,735 WOW, YOU KNOW, I FEEL BETTER ALREADY. 99 00:05:11,837 --> 00:05:13,370 UH, YES... 100 00:05:13,472 --> 00:05:15,938 I'LL GET YOU SOME MORE. 101 00:05:16,041 --> 00:05:19,709 LET ME GRAB SOME MORE TESTIES OUT OF MY BALL SACK. 102 00:05:20,178 --> 00:05:21,544 ( splash ) 103 00:05:21,646 --> 00:05:24,347 OH MY, LOOK AT THAT, A NAKED LADY. 104 00:05:26,517 --> 00:05:28,483 I'M NOT SEEING IT. 105 00:05:28,585 --> 00:05:29,684 ( phone ringing ) 106 00:05:29,786 --> 00:05:31,686 EXCUSE ME, THAT'S MY BIRTH CONTROL PILL PHONE. 107 00:05:31,788 --> 00:05:32,921 I GOTTA TAKE THIS. 108 00:05:33,024 --> 00:05:35,756 I MISSED IT ONCE AND I GOT IN BIG TROUBLE. 109 00:05:35,858 --> 00:05:38,926 CHIEF STROGANOFF, AGENT 69 HERE. 110 00:05:39,029 --> 00:05:40,428 ( Stroganoff ) Stripperella, I need you to meet me 111 00:05:40,530 --> 00:05:42,330 at the old corn field right away, 112 00:05:42,432 --> 00:05:43,798 it's an emergency. 113 00:05:43,900 --> 00:05:45,532 I'LL BE RIGHT THERE. 114 00:05:47,302 --> 00:05:49,269 ( crows cawing ) 115 00:06:03,083 --> 00:06:04,749 ( phone ringing ) 116 00:06:05,652 --> 00:06:06,618 CHIEF HERE. 117 00:06:06,720 --> 00:06:08,253 CHIEF, I'M AT THE CORNFIELD. 118 00:06:08,355 --> 00:06:09,587 WHERE ARE YOU ? 119 00:06:09,689 --> 00:06:10,821 WHAT CORNFIELD ? 120 00:06:10,923 --> 00:06:12,157 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ? 121 00:06:12,259 --> 00:06:13,892 YOU CALLED ME AND TOLD ME TO MEET YOU HERE. 122 00:06:13,994 --> 00:06:15,826 NOPE, WASN'T ME. 123 00:06:15,928 --> 00:06:17,060 I'M GUESSING SOMEONE HACKED INTO 124 00:06:17,162 --> 00:06:18,895 OUR SECRET ORGANIZATION'S SYSTEM TO CALL YOU 125 00:06:18,998 --> 00:06:21,798 AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE IT WAS COMING FROM MY NUMBER. 126 00:06:21,900 --> 00:06:23,267 then they probably used a computer 127 00:06:23,368 --> 00:06:26,201 to match my voice print and fool you into going down there. 128 00:06:26,304 --> 00:06:28,704 IT'S PROBABLY THE PERSON WHO'S BEEN TRYING TO KILL YOU. 129 00:06:28,806 --> 00:06:30,506 Well, I gotta run. 130 00:06:30,608 --> 00:06:32,642 TIME FOR MY BOTOX INJECTIONS. 131 00:06:50,826 --> 00:06:54,494 INVISIBLE BULLETPROOF UMBRELLA, DON'T FAIL ME NOW ! 132 00:07:01,002 --> 00:07:03,068 DAMN INVISIBLE BULLETPROOF UMBRELLA. 133 00:07:03,171 --> 00:07:05,437 I'LL KILL YOU YET ! 134 00:07:08,241 --> 00:07:09,641 "I'M GONNA KILL YOU, STRIPPERELLA. 135 00:07:09,744 --> 00:07:12,778 "YOU REALLY GOT LUCKY THIS TIME, 136 00:07:12,880 --> 00:07:14,211 "BUT YOU CAN'T ESCAPE FOREVER. 137 00:07:14,313 --> 00:07:16,981 "SERIOUSLY, YOUR DAYS ARE NUMBERED. 138 00:07:17,083 --> 00:07:19,950 "I WON'T STOP UNTIL YOU'RE DEED... 139 00:07:20,052 --> 00:07:22,887 OOPS, THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO SAY 'DEAD'." 140 00:07:22,989 --> 00:07:24,588 ( gasps ) 141 00:07:32,063 --> 00:07:33,397 GENTLEMEN, PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER 142 00:07:33,499 --> 00:07:36,064 FOR THE ENCHANTING, EXHILARATING, EXQUISITE, 143 00:07:36,167 --> 00:07:39,469 EROTICA ! 144 00:07:41,272 --> 00:07:42,571 ( wolf whistles ) 145 00:07:48,245 --> 00:07:49,277 ( glass shattering ) 146 00:07:49,379 --> 00:07:50,645 AHH ! 147 00:07:52,782 --> 00:07:54,714 HUH ? 148 00:07:56,852 --> 00:07:57,918 UH... 149 00:07:58,020 --> 00:08:02,356 LET'S HAVE ANOTHER ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR EROTICA ! 150 00:08:02,458 --> 00:08:04,024 NOW, GET READY FOR GISELLE 151 00:08:04,125 --> 00:08:07,560 AND HER SPICY TRIBUTE TO ICE HOCKEY. 152 00:08:07,662 --> 00:08:11,063 OOH, I'VE GOT A ZAMBONI... 153 00:08:17,270 --> 00:08:18,570 THANKS FOR COVERING FOR ME. 154 00:08:18,673 --> 00:08:20,172 I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO ME LATELY. 155 00:08:20,274 --> 00:08:21,406 OH, NO PROBLEM. 156 00:08:21,508 --> 00:08:23,241 YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT WHAT YOU WERE SAYING 157 00:08:23,343 --> 00:08:24,742 ABOUT TWO PEOPLE AT WORK DATING... 158 00:08:24,844 --> 00:08:25,943 REALLY ? 159 00:08:26,046 --> 00:08:28,111 HEY, YOU KNOW THERE'S AN OLD HORROR MOVIE FESTIVAL 160 00:08:28,214 --> 00:08:29,514 THIS WEEKEND, DOWNTOWN. 161 00:08:29,615 --> 00:08:31,282 I LOVE HORROR MOVIES. 162 00:08:31,384 --> 00:08:33,284 OH, AWESOME, I LOVE HORROR MOVIES TOO. 163 00:08:33,386 --> 00:08:35,318 WOW, WE HAVE SO MUCH IN-- 164 00:08:35,420 --> 00:08:37,219 ( beeping & vibrating ) 165 00:08:37,322 --> 00:08:38,689 OOH... I GOTTA GO. 166 00:08:38,791 --> 00:08:40,190 AAAGH ! 167 00:08:40,292 --> 00:08:42,459 DON'T HURT ME, DON'T HURT ME ! 168 00:08:43,795 --> 00:08:45,460 WHEW-- AAH ! 169 00:08:47,498 --> 00:08:50,131 OOPSIE... 170 00:08:51,001 --> 00:08:52,601 CHIEF STROGANOFF, AGENT 69 REPORTING FOR DUTY. 171 00:08:52,703 --> 00:08:53,536 ( chainsaw buzzing ) 172 00:08:53,638 --> 00:08:54,902 WHAT ARE YOU DOING ?! 173 00:08:55,004 --> 00:08:56,337 I'M PERFORMING A BRIS. 174 00:08:56,439 --> 00:08:57,572 WAIT ! 175 00:08:57,674 --> 00:08:59,374 YOU CAN'T PERFORM A CIRCUMCISION WITH A CHAINSAW ! 176 00:08:59,476 --> 00:09:00,575 RIGHT ! 177 00:09:00,677 --> 00:09:02,644 THANK GOD I'M NOT RELIGIOUS. 178 00:09:02,746 --> 00:09:05,879 SORRY, WIENSTEINS, MAZELTOV. 179 00:09:08,284 --> 00:09:10,250 SO, WHY'D YOU CALL ME DOWN HERE ? 180 00:09:10,353 --> 00:09:12,552 WE KNOW WHO'S TRYING TO KILL YOU. 181 00:09:12,654 --> 00:09:13,754 WHO ? 182 00:09:13,856 --> 00:09:15,788 SPECIAL AGENT 14 WILL FILL YOU IN. 183 00:09:15,890 --> 00:09:18,490 SEND IN SPECIAL AGENT 14. 184 00:09:20,561 --> 00:09:22,862 CHIEF... STRIPPERELLA. 185 00:09:22,964 --> 00:09:28,700 I WAS ABLE TO DO A HANDWRITING ANALYSIS ON THE SKYWRITING. 186 00:09:31,571 --> 00:09:33,170 WOULDN'T IT HAVE BEEN EASIER TO DO A HAND-WRITING ANALYSIS 187 00:09:33,273 --> 00:09:35,238 FROM ONE OF THOSE HAND-WRITTEN DEATH THREATS ? 188 00:09:35,340 --> 00:09:37,574 YES, BUT THIS WAS FUNNIER. 189 00:09:37,677 --> 00:09:41,512 ANYHOW, I FOUND THAT THE SKYWRITING IS A DIRECT MATCH 190 00:09:41,614 --> 00:09:43,947 WITH THE SIGNATURE OF... 191 00:09:44,049 --> 00:09:45,548 QUEEN CLITORIS. 192 00:09:45,650 --> 00:09:49,352 NOTICE THE FANCY LOOPS ON THE "E"s. 193 00:09:49,454 --> 00:09:50,753 QUEEN CLITORIS ?! 194 00:09:50,855 --> 00:09:52,856 THAT WAS CLITORIS UNDER THAT HOOD ? 195 00:09:52,958 --> 00:09:54,189 SHE MUST STILL BE ANGRY 196 00:09:54,291 --> 00:09:56,157 BECAUSE I THWARTED HER PLANS TO BLOW UP THE WORLD. 197 00:09:56,260 --> 00:09:57,926 YOU'VE OBVIOUSLY STIMULATED CLITORIS 198 00:09:58,028 --> 00:09:59,828 AND GOT HER ALL WORKED UP. 199 00:09:59,930 --> 00:10:01,630 I THINK YOU NEED TO FINISH HER OFF. 200 00:10:01,732 --> 00:10:03,131 YOU'RE RIGHT, I CAN'T JUST WAIT AROUND FOR HER 201 00:10:03,233 --> 00:10:05,165 TO TRY TO KILL ME... AGAIN. 202 00:10:05,267 --> 00:10:06,234 I'M GONNA BRING HER TO ME. 203 00:10:06,335 --> 00:10:07,735 HOW ? 204 00:10:07,837 --> 00:10:10,638 I'M GONNA LURE HER WITH THE ONE THING I KNOW SHE CAN'T RESIST. 205 00:10:10,740 --> 00:10:14,040 THE WORLD'S GREATEST LATIN LOVER, ARMANDO. 206 00:10:14,142 --> 00:10:18,445 I THINK I KNOW SOMEONE ELSE WHO CANNOT RESIST ARMANDO... 207 00:10:18,547 --> 00:10:20,981 STRIPPERELLA. 208 00:10:21,082 --> 00:10:23,049 WELL, I GUESS HE'S KIND OF CUTE. 209 00:10:30,358 --> 00:10:32,791 OH, I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE-- OH, THANK YOU. 210 00:10:32,893 --> 00:10:35,493 AHHH... 211 00:10:35,595 --> 00:10:37,829 STRIPPERELLA ? 212 00:10:37,931 --> 00:10:39,631 ARMANDO, I JUST HAD TO SEE YOU. 213 00:10:39,732 --> 00:10:41,966 YOU WANT ME TO SIGN FOR YOU A COPY OF MY BOOK, 214 00:10:42,068 --> 00:10:45,269 "HOW TO BE MAKING THE LOVE, ARMANDO TEACH YOU." 215 00:10:45,370 --> 00:10:47,504 NO, WELL, YES, I WOULD LIKE THAT. 216 00:10:47,606 --> 00:10:48,839 BUT THAT'S NOW WHY I'M HERE. 217 00:10:48,941 --> 00:10:50,407 I WAITED IN LINE TWO AND A HALF HOURS 218 00:10:50,509 --> 00:10:53,076 TO TELL YOU THAT MY LIFE IS IN DANGER AND I NEED YOUR HELP. 219 00:10:53,178 --> 00:10:55,110 THEN MY HELP YOU MUST HAVE. 220 00:10:55,212 --> 00:10:58,114 ARMANDO WILL RETURN TO SIGN YOUR BOOKS AND YOUR BOOBIES LATER. 221 00:10:58,216 --> 00:11:00,016 BUT, FOR NOW, ARMANDO MUST GO. 222 00:11:00,117 --> 00:11:03,486 FOR, I AM THE WORLD'S GREATEST LOVER. 223 00:11:03,588 --> 00:11:06,821 THAT IS MY GIFT, THAT IS MY CURSE. 224 00:11:06,923 --> 00:11:09,857 AWW... AWW... AWW... 225 00:11:09,959 --> 00:11:11,692 LET'S GO. OOH ! 226 00:11:11,795 --> 00:11:12,627 LEONARD ? 227 00:11:12,729 --> 00:11:13,994 STRIPPERELLA ? 228 00:11:14,096 --> 00:11:15,495 HOW DID YOU KNOW MY NAME ? 229 00:11:15,597 --> 00:11:19,432 OH, UH, I HEARD HER SAY IT. 230 00:11:21,069 --> 00:11:22,236 WAIT A MINUTE... 231 00:11:22,338 --> 00:11:25,037 HOW DOES SHE KNOW MY NAME ? 232 00:11:30,378 --> 00:11:31,810 ( Stroganoff ) BASED ON OUR PREVIOUS SURVEILLANCE 233 00:11:31,912 --> 00:11:33,446 OF QUEEN CLITORIS, 234 00:11:33,547 --> 00:11:35,713 WE KNOW THAT SHE FREQUENTS ARMANDO'S WEBSITE. 235 00:11:35,815 --> 00:11:40,285 I AM PLACING A MESSAGE TO QUEEN CLITORIS ON YOUR SITE, 236 00:11:40,387 --> 00:11:44,522 SAYING THAT YOU WANT TO MAKE MAD PASSIONATE WHOOPIE TO HER. 237 00:11:44,624 --> 00:11:49,293 NOW ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS WAIT FOR HER TO RESPOND. 238 00:11:49,395 --> 00:11:51,829 ARMANDO, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR HELPING US. 239 00:11:51,931 --> 00:11:54,064 IF ANYONE CAN HANDLE CLITORIS, IT'S ME. 240 00:11:54,166 --> 00:11:56,098 HEY, MAYBE WHEN I'M DONE HANDLING HER, 241 00:11:56,200 --> 00:11:59,069 I WILL HANDLE YOU, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN... 242 00:11:59,171 --> 00:12:00,403 OOH... 243 00:12:00,505 --> 00:12:02,939 ♪ STRIPPERELLA AND ARMANDO SITTING IN A TREE ♪ 244 00:12:03,041 --> 00:12:05,607 ♪ K-I-S-S-I-N-G, FIRST COMES-- 245 00:12:05,709 --> 00:12:07,109 QUIT IT ! 246 00:12:07,211 --> 00:12:09,778 K-I-S... COOKING ? 247 00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:11,780 BINGO ! 248 00:12:11,882 --> 00:12:14,115 CLITORIS HAS RESPONDED ! 249 00:12:14,217 --> 00:12:17,084 SHE WANTS ARMANDO TO MEET HER TONIGHT AT MIDNIGHT 250 00:12:17,186 --> 00:12:19,854 AT A BAR CALLED "THE WET SPOT." 251 00:12:19,956 --> 00:12:21,021 THE WET SPOT ? 252 00:12:21,124 --> 00:12:22,423 THE WET SPOT... 253 00:12:22,525 --> 00:12:23,823 IT'S A LITTLE HOLE IN THE WALL, 254 00:12:23,925 --> 00:12:26,526 AT THE CORNER OF CANAL STREET AND BUSH DRIVE, 255 00:12:26,628 --> 00:12:28,161 IT'S IN THE MEAT PACKING DISTRICT. 256 00:12:28,263 --> 00:12:30,630 ARMANDO KNOWS WHERE THE WET SPOT IS. 257 00:12:30,733 --> 00:12:33,133 I CAN SMELL CLITORIS RIGHT ON OUR FINGERTIPS. 258 00:12:37,838 --> 00:12:39,504 ALL RIGHT, GENTLEMEN, FEELING SICK ? 259 00:12:39,606 --> 00:12:42,574 ( man ) TAKE TWO ASS-PIRIN AND CALL HER IN THE MORNING. 260 00:12:42,676 --> 00:12:44,408 HERE'S CAT. 261 00:12:44,510 --> 00:12:46,744 ( wolf whistle ) 262 00:12:54,620 --> 00:12:56,586 ( wolf whistle ) 263 00:13:11,068 --> 00:13:12,968 ( wolf whistle ) 264 00:13:22,612 --> 00:13:24,611 ( wolf whistle ) 265 00:13:32,921 --> 00:13:34,954 ( wolf whistle ) 266 00:13:46,466 --> 00:13:47,565 AND SO, WHENEVER I'M STRESSED, 267 00:13:47,667 --> 00:13:49,801 I JUST SQUEEZE THESE BALLS AND I FEEL BETTER. 268 00:13:49,903 --> 00:13:51,302 THESE TWO ARE JUST TESTIES. 269 00:13:51,404 --> 00:13:52,871 I HAVE SO MANY RESPONSES TO THAT 270 00:13:52,973 --> 00:13:54,538 I'M JUST NOT GONNA SAY ANYTHING. 271 00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:55,873 WELL, EROTICA, 272 00:13:55,975 --> 00:13:58,042 I TOOK YOUR ADVICE ABOUT ASKING SOMEONE OUT AT WORK. 273 00:13:58,144 --> 00:14:01,278 I ASKED PERSEPHONE TO GO WITH ME TO THE HORROR FEST ON FRIDAY. 274 00:14:01,380 --> 00:14:02,579 OH... 275 00:14:02,681 --> 00:14:04,613 PERSEPHONE IS THE GIRL YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT AT WORK. 276 00:14:04,716 --> 00:14:06,950 I KNEW THAT. 277 00:14:07,052 --> 00:14:08,618 SHE SAID NO. 278 00:14:08,720 --> 00:14:12,288 WOW, I DON'T THINK PERSEPHONE'S EVER SAID NO TO A GUY. 279 00:14:12,390 --> 00:14:14,155 GET THIS, AFTER ALL THAT 280 00:14:14,258 --> 00:14:17,025 SHE SAID SHE DOESN'T BELIEVE IN DATING PEOPLE AT WORK. 281 00:14:17,127 --> 00:14:18,126 THAT'S GREAT ! 282 00:14:18,229 --> 00:14:19,594 IT IS ? NO... 283 00:14:19,696 --> 00:14:21,863 I REALLY WANTED TO GO TO THAT HORROR FEST. 284 00:14:21,965 --> 00:14:25,299 HEY, HEY YOU WANTED TO GO TO THE HORROR FEST, TOO ! 285 00:14:25,401 --> 00:14:26,633 I SURE DO ! 286 00:14:26,735 --> 00:14:29,003 EROTICA, WHAT DO YOU SAY THE TWO OF US... 287 00:14:29,105 --> 00:14:30,437 YEAH... 288 00:14:30,539 --> 00:14:32,974 GET A BUNCH OF PEOPLE TOGETHER FROM WORK AND WE'LL ALL GO ! 289 00:14:33,075 --> 00:14:34,474 I'D LOVE TO !... 290 00:14:34,576 --> 00:14:36,209 GO WITH EVERYONE. 291 00:14:36,311 --> 00:14:37,977 ( beeping & vibrating ) 292 00:14:38,079 --> 00:14:39,379 OH, IT'S THE CHIEF-- 293 00:14:39,481 --> 00:14:41,748 I MEAN, THE CHEF. 294 00:14:43,384 --> 00:14:44,516 WHAT IS IT, CHIEF ? 295 00:14:44,619 --> 00:14:46,385 THERE'S BEEN A SLIGHT CHANGE IN PLANS. 296 00:14:46,487 --> 00:14:47,986 CLITORIS SWITCHED THE MEETING WITH ARMANDO 297 00:14:48,089 --> 00:14:49,655 FROM MIDNIGHT TO 10:00. 298 00:14:49,757 --> 00:14:50,789 10:00 ? 299 00:14:50,891 --> 00:14:52,158 THAT'S ONLY TWO MINUTES FROM NOW. 300 00:14:52,260 --> 00:14:54,025 I PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE CALLED YOU SIX HOURS AGO 301 00:14:54,127 --> 00:14:55,326 WHEN I FIRST FOUND OUT, 302 00:14:55,428 --> 00:14:57,862 BUT I WAS WATCHING THE D.V.D. OF "BRIDGET JONES'S DIARY." 303 00:14:57,964 --> 00:15:00,998 IT'S GOT OVER SIX HOURS OF DELETED SCENES. 304 00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:03,000 DID YOU KNOW THAT RENEE ZELLWEGER 305 00:15:03,102 --> 00:15:05,936 GAINED 475 POUNDS TO PLAY THE PART OF-- 306 00:15:18,183 --> 00:15:20,783 QUEEN CLITORIS ? 307 00:15:20,885 --> 00:15:24,852 ARMANDO, MY LOVE... 308 00:15:24,955 --> 00:15:27,122 GEWW... 309 00:15:27,224 --> 00:15:28,456 EWW... 310 00:15:28,558 --> 00:15:32,694 I MEAN-- OH, BABY, YOU ARE JUST LIKE I REMEMBER YOU. 311 00:15:32,796 --> 00:15:36,196 YOU ARE SO SEXY...ISH. 312 00:15:36,299 --> 00:15:39,266 COME, JOIN ME. 313 00:15:47,809 --> 00:15:49,442 CHAMPAGNE, MY LOVE ? 314 00:15:49,544 --> 00:15:51,544 OH GOD, YES. 315 00:15:51,646 --> 00:15:53,378 ( chug-a-lugging ) 316 00:15:55,916 --> 00:15:58,951 KISS ME, YOU LATIN HUNK. 317 00:15:59,053 --> 00:16:00,786 UHH... 318 00:16:20,805 --> 00:16:22,305 STRIPPERELLA, MY BABY ! 319 00:16:22,407 --> 00:16:26,341 OH, HELP STRIPPERELLA, MY BABY ! 320 00:16:28,045 --> 00:16:30,946 MY BABY IS STUCK IN THAT MAILBOX ! 321 00:16:34,417 --> 00:16:37,852 I MEANT TO MAIL THIS PACKAGE AND I GOT CONFUSED AND-- 322 00:16:37,954 --> 00:16:39,721 OKAY, I'LL SAVE YOUR BABY. 323 00:16:39,823 --> 00:16:41,890 BUT I'M IN A HURRY. 324 00:16:47,296 --> 00:16:50,764 ARMANDO, YOU SEEM DISTRACTED. 325 00:16:50,866 --> 00:16:52,765 ONLY BY YOUR, UH... 326 00:16:52,867 --> 00:16:54,834 BEAUTY ? 327 00:16:54,936 --> 00:16:58,170 LET'S GO BACK TO MY SECRET EVIL LAIR. 328 00:16:58,273 --> 00:17:01,440 MAYBE WE SHOULD LINGER HERE FOR A LITTLE-- AAH ! 329 00:17:04,844 --> 00:17:07,211 ( baby chatter ) 330 00:17:10,951 --> 00:17:12,816 OH ! 331 00:17:12,918 --> 00:17:15,685 OH, HONEY ! 332 00:17:17,356 --> 00:17:20,090 ONE OTHER THING, THERE WAS A MISUNDERSTANDING 333 00:17:20,192 --> 00:17:23,325 AND I WROTE A LETTER TO MY BOSS CALLING HIM A "BIG, FAT IDIOT" 334 00:17:23,428 --> 00:17:26,095 AND I NEED IT BACK OR I'LL BE FIRED. 335 00:17:26,197 --> 00:17:28,131 CAN YOU HELP ME FIND IT IN THERE ? 336 00:17:28,233 --> 00:17:29,999 NO ! 337 00:17:31,536 --> 00:17:32,700 WELL, THANKS FOR NOTHING ! 338 00:17:39,642 --> 00:17:41,276 ARMANDO ? 339 00:17:44,580 --> 00:17:46,981 STRIPPERELLA, I GOT HERE AS SOON AS I COULD. 340 00:17:47,083 --> 00:17:48,849 THEY'RE NOT HERE, WE MISSED THEM ! 341 00:17:48,951 --> 00:17:51,084 ARMANDO'S LATIN, HUNKY LIFE IS IN DANGER 342 00:17:51,186 --> 00:17:52,618 AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT ! 343 00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:53,853 NOT TO WORRY. 344 00:17:53,955 --> 00:17:56,589 WE REPLACED ARMANDO'S KIDNEY WITH A TRACKING DEVICE. 345 00:17:56,691 --> 00:17:57,857 HIS KIDNEY ? 346 00:17:57,959 --> 00:17:59,859 YOU COULDN'T HAVE JUST TAPED SOMETHING TO HIS BODY 347 00:17:59,962 --> 00:18:01,093 OR PUT SOMETHING IN HIS POCKET ? 348 00:18:01,196 --> 00:18:03,429 HE ALREADY HAD STUFF IN HIS POCKETS. 349 00:18:03,531 --> 00:18:04,830 NOW, QUIT WASTING TIME. 350 00:18:04,932 --> 00:18:09,034 GO SAVE ARMANDO AND LICK CLITORIS ONCE AND FOR ALL ! 351 00:18:15,241 --> 00:18:18,842 ( woman on navigator ) Continue in the straight direction. 352 00:18:19,979 --> 00:18:22,280 Take a left at the next right. 353 00:18:23,482 --> 00:18:27,517 Ahead, you will find a bushy hole. 354 00:18:27,619 --> 00:18:30,586 Armando is around here, somewhere. 355 00:18:30,689 --> 00:18:34,289 ARMANDO'S GOTTA BE AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE. 356 00:18:36,627 --> 00:18:39,461 HE MUST BE INSIDE THIS BUSHY TUNNEL. 357 00:18:45,768 --> 00:18:47,501 MMM, THAT WAS GREAT. 358 00:18:47,604 --> 00:18:50,271 LET'S DO IT AGAIN. 359 00:18:50,373 --> 00:18:52,939 IS NOT THREE TIMES ENOUGH ? 360 00:18:53,041 --> 00:18:55,409 I SAID LET'S DO IT AGAIN ! 361 00:18:55,511 --> 00:18:57,344 ( Stripperella ) YOU'LL BE DOING NOTHING AGAIN ! 362 00:18:57,446 --> 00:18:58,778 STRIPPERELLA ! 363 00:18:58,881 --> 00:19:00,447 STRIPPERELLA GET ME OUT OF HERE ! 364 00:19:00,549 --> 00:19:01,915 GET YOU OUT OF HERE ? 365 00:19:02,017 --> 00:19:03,882 ARMANDO, I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING... 366 00:19:03,984 --> 00:19:07,186 NO, IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE TO BE UP EARLY FOR WORK TOMORROW. 367 00:19:07,288 --> 00:19:08,788 I'LL CALL YOU... I PROMISE. 368 00:19:08,890 --> 00:19:10,223 YOU'RE JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER GUY. 369 00:19:10,325 --> 00:19:11,790 YOU JUST WANTED TO HAVE SEX WITH ME, 370 00:19:11,893 --> 00:19:14,126 AND NOW YOU WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH ME ! 371 00:19:14,228 --> 00:19:16,828 I DID NOT WANT TO HAVE THE SEX WITH YOU, TRUST ME. 372 00:19:16,930 --> 00:19:18,563 I'LL GIVE YOU TWO CHOICES, CLITORIS. 373 00:19:18,665 --> 00:19:20,364 YOU CAN EITHER COME QUIETLY, 374 00:19:20,466 --> 00:19:22,933 OR COME SCREAMING AFTER I WORK YOU OVER. 375 00:19:23,035 --> 00:19:25,503 I'M NOT COMING AT ALL. 376 00:19:25,605 --> 00:19:27,505 I THINK I'LL CHOOSE OPTION NUMBER THREE. 377 00:19:27,606 --> 00:19:29,706 THAT'S THE ONE WHERE I KILL YOU BOTH ! 378 00:19:29,808 --> 00:19:31,708 ( screams like a woman ) 379 00:19:31,810 --> 00:19:33,409 SHE'S GOT A GUN, SHE'S GOT A GUN ! 380 00:19:33,511 --> 00:19:35,378 GET OVER THERE BY STRIPPERELLA. 381 00:19:35,480 --> 00:19:37,213 ( whimpering ) 382 00:19:37,315 --> 00:19:40,283 LET'S SEE, WHO SHOULD I SHOOT FIRST ? 383 00:19:40,385 --> 00:19:43,118 ( thinking ) DON'T STRESS, STRIPPERELLA, JUST TAKE A DEEP BREATH. 384 00:19:43,220 --> 00:19:45,921 OH, I WISH I HAD MY STRESS BALLS... 385 00:19:47,625 --> 00:19:49,324 SORRY, ARMANDO. 386 00:19:49,426 --> 00:19:51,093 ( crunching ) 387 00:19:51,195 --> 00:19:52,860 GAAAH !!! 388 00:19:52,962 --> 00:19:54,962 OOHHH !!! 389 00:19:55,898 --> 00:19:57,932 OH, I FEEL MUCH BETTER. 390 00:19:58,034 --> 00:19:59,399 WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT ? 391 00:19:59,501 --> 00:20:01,702 HAH ! 392 00:20:01,804 --> 00:20:04,937 IT WAS ABOUT CREATING A DIVERSION. 393 00:20:05,039 --> 00:20:07,540 NOW IT'S TIME TO GO DOWNTOWN, CLITORIS. 394 00:20:07,642 --> 00:20:08,908 ( groaning ) 395 00:20:09,010 --> 00:20:11,077 ( high-pitched voice ) CAN SOMEONE CALL A DOCTOR ? 396 00:20:11,179 --> 00:20:14,613 PREFERABLY A SEXY FEMALE DOCTOR ? 397 00:20:28,094 --> 00:20:31,228 EXCUSE ME, I KNOW WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE, 398 00:20:31,331 --> 00:20:33,864 BUT DO YOU KNOW IF THERE'S BATHROOM AROUND HERE ? 399 00:20:33,966 --> 00:20:36,166 UH-HUH... 400 00:20:38,170 --> 00:20:40,670 ISN'T THAT THE ABANDONED INSANE ASYLUM 401 00:20:40,772 --> 00:20:43,372 WHERE ALL THOSE KIDS WERE MURDERED 10 YEARS AGO 402 00:20:43,475 --> 00:20:44,707 THIS VERY NIGHT ? 403 00:20:44,809 --> 00:20:46,709 YEAH... 404 00:20:46,811 --> 00:20:49,678 WELL, WHEN YOU GOTTA GO, YOU GOTTA GO. 405 00:20:57,320 --> 00:21:00,255 LEONARD, PLEASE... NOT SO TIGHT. 406 00:21:00,357 --> 00:21:04,725 ( door creaks open in movie ) 407 00:21:04,827 --> 00:21:06,192 OH, DON'T GO IN THERE ! 408 00:21:06,294 --> 00:21:07,328 DON'T GO IN THERE ! 409 00:21:07,430 --> 00:21:08,629 ( woman in movie ) Ahhh ! 410 00:21:08,731 --> 00:21:12,264 OH, SHE WENT IN THERE... 411 00:21:12,366 --> 00:21:14,300 I'M REALLY GLAD WE DID THIS. 412 00:21:14,402 --> 00:21:15,568 ME, TOO. 413 00:21:15,670 --> 00:21:16,903 Ahhh ! 414 00:21:17,005 --> 00:21:19,304 ( splat ) 415 00:21:42,127 --> 00:21:44,694 ♪ Stripperella ♪ 416 00:21:46,197 --> 00:21:49,165 ♪ Stripperella ♪ 28731

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