Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:18,319 --> 00:00:21,931
♪ Green Acres is the place to be
2
00:00:21,955 --> 00:00:25,869
♪ Farm living is the life for me
3
00:00:25,893 --> 00:00:29,906
♪ Land spreading
out so far and wide
4
00:00:29,930 --> 00:00:34,077
♪ Keep Manhattan just
give me that countryside
5
00:00:34,101 --> 00:00:38,081
♪ New York is
where I'd rather stay
6
00:00:38,105 --> 00:00:42,085
♪ I get allergic smelling hay
7
00:00:42,109 --> 00:00:46,056
♪ I just adore a penthouse view
8
00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:50,249
♪ Darling I love you
but give me Park Avenue
9
00:00:51,252 --> 00:00:57,401
♪ The chores ♪
The stores ♪ Fresh air
10
00:00:57,425 --> 00:01:00,337
♪ Times Square ♪ You are my wife
11
00:01:00,361 --> 00:01:02,105
♪ Goodbye city life
12
00:01:02,129 --> 00:01:05,730
♪ Green Acres we are there
13
00:01:15,776 --> 00:01:18,655
- Pound of bacon,
two pounds of butter,
14
00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:22,114
two loaves of bread,
a large can of peas,
15
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:26,096
quart of olive oil,
can of sardines,
16
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:27,697
and a pound of chopped meat.
17
00:01:27,721 --> 00:01:28,865
That be all Mr. Douglas?
18
00:01:28,889 --> 00:01:29,799
- Yes that's all.
19
00:01:29,823 --> 00:01:31,834
- That comes to a dollar 18.
20
00:01:31,858 --> 00:01:33,437
- A dollar 18?
21
00:01:33,461 --> 00:01:35,505
- Don't get mad at
me, it ain't my doing.
22
00:01:35,529 --> 00:01:39,276
The wholesaler raises
me, I gotta raise you.
23
00:01:39,300 --> 00:01:40,477
- Yeah well...
24
00:01:40,501 --> 00:01:42,379
- It's criminal the way
prices are going up.
25
00:01:42,403 --> 00:01:43,646
You bought any gas lately?
26
00:01:43,670 --> 00:01:45,515
It's 13 cents a gallon now.
27
00:01:46,673 --> 00:01:47,917
- 13...
28
00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:49,752
- You need anything
else Mr. Douglas?
29
00:01:49,776 --> 00:01:51,188
- No no thanks that's all.
30
00:01:51,212 --> 00:01:53,423
- I almost forgot,
there's a letter for you.
31
00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:54,624
- Oh?
32
00:01:54,648 --> 00:01:55,925
- Yeah the way
things are going up,
33
00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:57,860
I'm surprised folks
are writing anymore.
34
00:01:57,884 --> 00:02:00,497
Writing paper's gone
up five cents a box.
35
00:02:00,521 --> 00:02:03,900
It's hard to get a bottle of
ink for less than four cents.
36
00:02:03,924 --> 00:02:06,069
Now I hate to tell you what
I have to charge for blotters
37
00:02:06,093 --> 00:02:08,138
and have you bought
any pen wipers lately?
38
00:02:08,162 --> 00:02:10,140
- No I...
- Well don't.
39
00:02:10,164 --> 00:02:12,342
- Could I please have my letter?
40
00:02:12,366 --> 00:02:13,743
- Oh yeah there you are.
41
00:02:13,767 --> 00:02:15,512
The whole thing's
getting out of hand.
42
00:02:15,536 --> 00:02:17,481
It's a good thing Coolidge
didn't choose to run again
43
00:02:17,505 --> 00:02:18,982
'cause I wouldn't
have voted for him.
44
00:02:20,674 --> 00:02:23,675
- Yeah I don't
think I would either.
45
00:02:25,012 --> 00:02:26,189
- Anything important?
46
00:02:26,213 --> 00:02:29,126
- Oh no, it's a birthday
card from my mother.
47
00:02:29,150 --> 00:02:31,961
- You know I love those
poems they write on those cards.
48
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,630
You mind if I look at it?
49
00:02:33,654 --> 00:02:35,932
- No, go right ahead.
50
00:02:35,956 --> 00:02:38,801
- Happy birthday oh son of mine.
51
00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:41,738
Hope this finds
you well and fine.
52
00:02:41,762 --> 00:02:44,674
The joys you brought
me all through life.
53
00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:47,710
Never any sorrow,
never any strife.
54
00:02:47,734 --> 00:02:51,148
And now you're
married and have a wife.
55
00:02:51,172 --> 00:02:53,850
Happy birthday oh son of mine.
56
00:02:56,644 --> 00:03:00,190
Them poets sure know
how to get to you here.
57
00:03:00,214 --> 00:03:01,491
- Yes, they're real...
58
00:03:01,515 --> 00:03:03,926
- Oh by the way, happy birthday.
59
00:03:03,950 --> 00:03:06,296
- Thanks but my birthday
isn't until tomorrow.
60
00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:07,497
- You're kidding?
61
00:03:07,521 --> 00:03:09,566
You know who else's
birthday it is tomorrow?
62
00:03:09,590 --> 00:03:10,600
- Yours?
63
00:03:10,624 --> 00:03:13,069
- No, Arnold's.
- The pig?
64
00:03:13,093 --> 00:03:15,605
- Yeah, you and him
ought to celebrate together.
65
00:03:15,629 --> 00:03:17,962
- Well not if I can help it.
66
00:03:19,333 --> 00:03:21,110
- Well anyway, best wishes.
67
00:03:21,134 --> 00:03:23,647
- Thank you thank you.
68
00:03:24,738 --> 00:03:26,149
Hi!
69
00:03:26,173 --> 00:03:27,506
- Oh hello dear.
70
00:03:29,076 --> 00:03:31,321
- What's in the washing machine?
71
00:03:31,345 --> 00:03:32,511
- Oh curtains.
72
00:03:33,647 --> 00:03:36,047
- Curtains, how do you, what?
73
00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:41,431
Lisa, most people take
the curtains off the rods.
74
00:03:41,455 --> 00:03:42,765
- Then how do they
know which curtain
75
00:03:42,789 --> 00:03:45,168
goes back on which rod?
76
00:03:45,192 --> 00:03:46,436
- Well they...
77
00:03:46,460 --> 00:03:47,671
- Besides if I just
washed the curtains
78
00:03:47,695 --> 00:03:50,139
and I didn't wash the
rods, then we would have
79
00:03:50,163 --> 00:03:52,609
clean curtains and dirty rods.
80
00:03:52,633 --> 00:03:56,134
And you know how
you are about dirty rods.
81
00:03:57,304 --> 00:03:59,449
- You put the whole
thing in the dryer too?
82
00:03:59,473 --> 00:04:03,575
- Certainly, otherwise we
have dry curtains with wet rods.
83
00:04:04,945 --> 00:04:08,124
And you know how
you are with wet rods.
84
00:04:08,148 --> 00:04:10,882
- Oh yes I'm a
demon on wet rods.
85
00:04:13,454 --> 00:04:14,931
- Where are the groceries?
86
00:04:14,955 --> 00:04:19,302
- They're out in the
car, I'll get oh wait hey.
87
00:04:19,326 --> 00:04:21,471
My mother sent me
a card for my birthday.
88
00:04:21,495 --> 00:04:22,905
- What for?
89
00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:24,807
- For my birthday.
90
00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:27,232
- Oh, happy birthday darling.
91
00:04:28,469 --> 00:04:31,013
- Thank you, but
tomorrow is my birthday.
92
00:04:31,037 --> 00:04:33,650
- That's Arnold's birthday!
93
00:04:33,674 --> 00:04:34,917
- What has that
got to do with...
94
00:04:34,941 --> 00:04:36,819
- You and he should
celebrate together.
95
00:04:36,843 --> 00:04:37,843
- No thanks.
96
00:04:39,179 --> 00:04:40,957
- What do you want
to do for your birthday?
97
00:04:40,981 --> 00:04:42,158
- Nothing.
98
00:04:42,182 --> 00:04:43,226
- How would you
like me to give you
99
00:04:43,250 --> 00:04:45,528
a surprise birthday party?
100
00:04:45,552 --> 00:04:47,029
- Lisa...
101
00:04:47,053 --> 00:04:48,531
- No no, well I get you out of
the house on some pretense
102
00:04:48,555 --> 00:04:51,568
and then we go back in
and we turn on the lights
103
00:04:51,592 --> 00:04:53,403
and everybody jumps
out of the closets
104
00:04:53,427 --> 00:04:56,640
and they yell surprise
surprise and your mouth
105
00:04:56,664 --> 00:04:59,376
flies open and you start to cry.
106
00:05:00,901 --> 00:05:04,314
- Lisa, you have given
me surprise parties before.
107
00:05:04,338 --> 00:05:05,982
Now the last one was a lulu.
108
00:05:06,006 --> 00:05:08,618
Remember you got me out
of our apartment in New York?
109
00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:09,819
When we came back...
110
00:05:09,843 --> 00:05:11,388
- Boy were you surprised.
111
00:05:11,412 --> 00:05:13,723
- So were you, somebody
had stolen all our furniture.
112
00:05:15,616 --> 00:05:17,126
- Well didn't we have fun?
113
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,462
- I don't want to do
anything on my birthday.
114
00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:21,464
No parties, nothing,
just let the day pass
115
00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:23,555
quietly without any fuss.
116
00:05:24,692 --> 00:05:27,103
Well, maybe after
dinner we can pop open
117
00:05:27,127 --> 00:05:28,672
a bottle of champagne.
118
00:05:28,696 --> 00:05:30,473
- How about a birthday cake?
119
00:05:30,497 --> 00:05:32,275
- Well a birthday cake's fine.
120
00:05:32,299 --> 00:05:35,679
- How many girls do you
want to come out of it?
121
00:05:35,703 --> 00:05:38,648
- Lisa please, do
me a favor, no fuss.
122
00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:42,419
- Then I'll take back the
birthday present I got for you.
123
00:05:42,443 --> 00:05:44,153
- You don't have
to take it back.
124
00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:45,855
- You said no fuss.
125
00:05:45,879 --> 00:05:47,490
- Well I didn't...
126
00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:49,025
- Do you want your present now?
127
00:05:49,049 --> 00:05:50,527
- No, tomorrow.
128
00:05:50,551 --> 00:05:52,295
- Do you want to
know what it is?
129
00:05:52,319 --> 00:05:53,319
- I'll wait.
130
00:05:54,488 --> 00:05:56,433
But I'll go out and
get the groceries.
131
00:05:56,457 --> 00:05:58,067
- Okay, while you're doing that
132
00:05:58,091 --> 00:06:00,559
I'll go and feed your present.
133
00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:16,308
- Mr. Haney!
134
00:06:17,344 --> 00:06:18,344
Mr. Haney.
135
00:06:19,112 --> 00:06:21,057
- Looking for me?
136
00:06:21,081 --> 00:06:22,258
- Well what were you doing...
137
00:06:22,282 --> 00:06:25,795
- I had to use your...
- Oh oh yeah.
138
00:06:25,819 --> 00:06:26,896
- My hands was dirty.
139
00:06:28,422 --> 00:06:31,501
Now how much did
you figure on spending?
140
00:06:31,525 --> 00:06:33,002
- For what?
141
00:06:33,026 --> 00:06:35,805
- Arnold's birthday present.
142
00:06:35,829 --> 00:06:38,207
- Arnold's...
- Tomorrow is his birthday.
143
00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:40,643
- It also happens
to be my birthday.
144
00:06:40,667 --> 00:06:44,146
- You're funning me, imagine
two such famous people
145
00:06:44,170 --> 00:06:46,916
being born on the same day.
146
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:48,184
- Oh now he's not so...
147
00:06:48,208 --> 00:06:49,952
- Well I suppose now
that you want to see
148
00:06:49,976 --> 00:06:52,377
something in the $50 bracket.
149
00:06:53,447 --> 00:06:55,324
- $50 for a pig?
150
00:06:55,348 --> 00:06:58,795
- Well that's for the
complete birthday package.
151
00:06:58,819 --> 00:07:00,764
Card, present, and cake.
152
00:07:00,788 --> 00:07:02,231
- I don't want any...
153
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:05,990
- Now shall we start by
selecting the birthday card?
154
00:07:07,227 --> 00:07:10,874
Here's one that's very
popular this season.
155
00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:13,398
Happy birthday oh pig o' mine.
156
00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:16,780
- Oh pig o' mine?
157
00:07:16,804 --> 00:07:19,883
- Hope this finds
you well and fine.
158
00:07:19,907 --> 00:07:22,084
The joys you brought
me all through life...
159
00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:24,888
- Yeah yeah I'm
familiar with the poem.
160
00:07:24,912 --> 00:07:27,990
- Oh, that Henry
Wadsworth Longfellow
161
00:07:28,014 --> 00:07:29,859
wrote some great stuff.
162
00:07:29,883 --> 00:07:31,694
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow?
163
00:07:31,718 --> 00:07:35,131
- Well now that we have
selected the birthday card,
164
00:07:35,155 --> 00:07:39,168
shall we step back to the
mobile gift department?
165
00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:41,604
Every time Mo sees
it, he gets his bile up.
166
00:07:43,363 --> 00:07:45,575
- That's the worst
thing I ever heard.
167
00:07:45,599 --> 00:07:49,579
- Yeah but it got you
to the back of the truck.
168
00:07:49,603 --> 00:07:52,715
Now get a grip on
yourself, Mr. Douglas.
169
00:07:52,739 --> 00:07:55,117
Your eyes are
about to be greeted
170
00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:57,954
with an array of gifts
that are worthy of...
171
00:07:57,978 --> 00:08:00,056
- Just show me the junk
and let me get out of here.
172
00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:01,080
- Oh yeah.
173
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:07,096
There you are, any
one of those would warm
174
00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:09,666
the cockles of a
little pig's heart.
175
00:08:09,690 --> 00:08:12,902
- I'm not interested in
warming his cockles.
176
00:08:12,926 --> 00:08:16,105
- Now I wouldn't
suggest the skis for Arnold
177
00:08:16,129 --> 00:08:18,240
because you'll
need four of them,
178
00:08:18,264 --> 00:08:20,977
but he might enjoy
this basketball.
179
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:22,846
- But I told you I...
180
00:08:22,870 --> 00:08:26,983
- How about this mink
lined electric snout warmer?
181
00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:29,118
For the pig that has everything.
182
00:08:30,410 --> 00:08:32,622
Now this can be plugged
into a set of batteries
183
00:08:32,646 --> 00:08:34,557
that Arnold can wear strapped
184
00:08:34,581 --> 00:08:37,760
to the underside of his stomach.
185
00:08:37,784 --> 00:08:39,428
If you're worried
about it showing...
186
00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:40,897
- I'm not.
187
00:08:40,921 --> 00:08:44,367
- It can be covered with
this matching mink car coat.
188
00:08:45,893 --> 00:08:47,036
- Look Mr. Haney...
189
00:08:47,060 --> 00:08:49,973
- Now while your
present is being wrapped,
190
00:08:49,997 --> 00:08:53,331
let's move on to
Arnold's birthday cake.
191
00:08:54,467 --> 00:08:57,013
Ha, that's the size
I would suggest.
192
00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:59,482
What message would you
like printed on the cake?
193
00:08:59,506 --> 00:09:01,105
- Will you get lost?
194
00:09:02,142 --> 00:09:04,153
- Did you get that Sarah?
195
00:09:04,177 --> 00:09:05,177
- Sarah?
196
00:09:11,752 --> 00:09:13,262
- Ain't that beautiful?
197
00:09:13,286 --> 00:09:17,333
That was Sarah Hotchkiss,
the world's fastest cake printer.
198
00:09:17,357 --> 00:09:18,635
- Where did she...
199
00:09:18,659 --> 00:09:22,204
- That'll cost you
$8.90, unless you've got
200
00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:25,174
another message
you'd like to add.
201
00:09:25,198 --> 00:09:26,208
- Beat it!
202
00:09:32,873 --> 00:09:36,085
- This is nice too.
- Oh you dirty...
203
00:09:43,717 --> 00:09:47,063
- There you are, anything
else you'd like to say?
204
00:09:47,087 --> 00:09:49,432
- Not for publication, now
if you don't get your truck
205
00:09:49,456 --> 00:09:51,300
and that little old
cake printer out of here
206
00:09:51,324 --> 00:09:53,469
I'll throw you off my property!
207
00:09:57,965 --> 00:10:00,242
- Cancel that last
message, Sarah.
208
00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:03,012
It ain't a fit sentiment
for a birthday cake.
209
00:10:12,545 --> 00:10:14,090
- Oh look Eb...
210
00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:15,391
- I'm wrapping a
birthday present.
211
00:10:15,415 --> 00:10:17,694
I understand it's your
birthday tomorrow.
212
00:10:17,718 --> 00:10:19,328
- You didn't have
to get me anything.
213
00:10:19,352 --> 00:10:20,763
- I didn't, this is for Arnold.
214
00:10:20,787 --> 00:10:21,787
- Arnold?
215
00:10:22,723 --> 00:10:24,100
- Yeah it's his
birthday tomorrow too.
216
00:10:24,124 --> 00:10:25,568
- I know, I know.
217
00:10:25,592 --> 00:10:26,569
- What'd you get him?
218
00:10:26,593 --> 00:10:27,503
- Nothing.
219
00:10:27,527 --> 00:10:29,572
- He's not gonna like that.
220
00:10:29,596 --> 00:10:31,107
- I really don't care.
221
00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:33,876
- He probably won't get you
anything for your birthday.
222
00:10:33,900 --> 00:10:35,344
- Fine.
223
00:10:35,368 --> 00:10:38,147
- Imagine you and Arnold
being born on the same day.
224
00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:40,650
Golly, maybe your
mother and his mother
225
00:10:40,674 --> 00:10:42,619
lay side by side in
the same hospital!
226
00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:45,387
- I doubt it.
227
00:10:45,411 --> 00:10:47,256
- Yeah, his mother
probably had a private room.
228
00:10:48,615 --> 00:10:49,826
- Well my mother...
229
00:10:49,850 --> 00:10:50,793
- Hey put your
finger right here.
230
00:10:50,817 --> 00:10:51,928
- Right there?
- Yeah.
231
00:10:51,952 --> 00:10:52,996
- Sure.
- Okay?
232
00:10:55,122 --> 00:10:56,365
You!
233
00:10:56,389 --> 00:10:57,667
- You ruined the bow!
234
00:10:57,691 --> 00:10:59,335
- I'm sorry!
235
00:10:59,359 --> 00:11:02,138
- Well I guess it'd look
all right without a bow.
236
00:11:02,162 --> 00:11:04,240
Do you want a bow
on your present?
237
00:11:04,264 --> 00:11:05,708
- Thought you didn't
get me a present.
238
00:11:05,732 --> 00:11:07,476
- Oh I was only teasing,
I'm gonna give it to you
239
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:08,945
at your surprise party.
240
00:11:08,969 --> 00:11:10,412
- Oh I'm not having
a surprise party.
241
00:11:10,436 --> 00:11:13,049
- Well that's a surprise.
242
00:11:13,073 --> 00:11:14,316
- I'm not having any party.
243
00:11:14,340 --> 00:11:17,319
I'm just gonna have
a nice, quiet birthday.
244
00:11:17,343 --> 00:11:19,522
- Oh, are you gonna
give me the day off?
245
00:11:19,546 --> 00:11:20,990
- Why should I do that?
246
00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:22,725
- Well you always give me
Abraham Lincoln's birthday off
247
00:11:22,749 --> 00:11:24,393
and he was a classmate of yours.
248
00:11:25,618 --> 00:11:26,829
- Look Eb...
249
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:27,997
- As long as you're
not having a party
250
00:11:28,021 --> 00:11:29,699
do you want your
birthday present now?
251
00:11:29,723 --> 00:11:31,067
- No.
252
00:11:31,091 --> 00:11:32,135
- You want to know what it is?
253
00:11:32,159 --> 00:11:33,636
- No.
254
00:11:33,660 --> 00:11:34,637
- In that case
I'd better take it
255
00:11:34,661 --> 00:11:36,372
for a walk before I wrap it.
256
00:11:39,166 --> 00:11:40,977
- Take it for a walk?
257
00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:43,245
- Well I fed your present.
258
00:11:43,269 --> 00:11:46,082
- Lisa, what did you get me?
259
00:11:46,106 --> 00:11:49,318
- Well it, I don't want
to spoil the surprise.
260
00:11:49,342 --> 00:11:51,854
- But...
- You'll love it!
261
00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:53,522
- I'm sure I will.
262
00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:56,625
- If you'll excuse me,
I'll go and spray it.
263
00:11:56,649 --> 00:11:58,494
- Why do you have to spray it?
264
00:11:58,518 --> 00:12:01,664
- Well that's what
the book says.
265
00:12:01,688 --> 00:12:04,133
- What kind of a...
- Did you see?
266
00:12:04,157 --> 00:12:05,068
- See what?
267
00:12:05,092 --> 00:12:06,736
- Your present, it escaped.
268
00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:09,906
Here Gwendolyn, here Gwendolyn!
269
00:12:09,930 --> 00:12:10,930
- Gwendolyn?
270
00:12:22,943 --> 00:12:24,042
Good morning.
271
00:12:26,012 --> 00:12:28,057
- Good morning.
272
00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:29,247
- Is that all?
273
00:12:30,316 --> 00:12:32,795
- Well what else do you want?
274
00:12:32,819 --> 00:12:34,697
- It's my birthday, aren't
you going to wish me
275
00:12:34,721 --> 00:12:37,499
a happy birthday
and give me a kiss?
276
00:12:37,523 --> 00:12:40,937
- You said you
didn't want any fuss.
277
00:12:40,961 --> 00:12:42,805
- A kiss and wishing
me a happy birthday,
278
00:12:42,829 --> 00:12:44,774
I don't call that a fuss.
279
00:12:44,798 --> 00:12:47,966
- I guess a little
kiss wouldn't hurt.
280
00:12:49,736 --> 00:12:51,413
Happy birthday darling.
281
00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:52,437
- Thank you.
282
00:12:54,507 --> 00:12:57,053
- Do you want your present now?
283
00:12:57,077 --> 00:12:58,654
- Oh I'd love it.
284
00:13:13,493 --> 00:13:16,639
- Oliver, Oliver
your present is gone!
285
00:13:16,663 --> 00:13:18,040
- Gone?
- Yes.
286
00:13:18,064 --> 00:13:19,041
- What was it?
287
00:13:19,065 --> 00:13:20,243
- Well it was a...
288
00:13:20,267 --> 00:13:21,577
- Mrs. Douglas,
guess what happened!
289
00:13:21,601 --> 00:13:22,745
- What?
290
00:13:22,769 --> 00:13:24,213
- My birthday
present broke its chain
291
00:13:24,237 --> 00:13:26,282
and got into a fight with
your birthday present
292
00:13:26,306 --> 00:13:28,818
and your birthday present
ate my birthday present up
293
00:13:28,842 --> 00:13:29,986
and then it flew away.
294
00:13:31,544 --> 00:13:32,755
- It ate it up?
295
00:13:32,779 --> 00:13:34,757
- Well here's the card
that went with it, Dad.
296
00:13:34,781 --> 00:13:38,360
- I am not your... Thank you.
297
00:13:38,384 --> 00:13:39,996
- I'm sorry about your
present, but if you capture
298
00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:42,765
Mrs. Douglas's, you'll
probably find mine inside.
299
00:13:44,590 --> 00:13:46,602
- What kind of
presents are they?
300
00:13:46,626 --> 00:13:47,837
- Well mine was a...
301
00:13:47,861 --> 00:13:49,872
- Come on Eb, let's
go out and look for it.
302
00:13:49,896 --> 00:13:51,274
- I'll be happy to help you.
303
00:13:51,298 --> 00:13:53,910
- Oh thank you, but you
wouldn't know what to look for.
304
00:13:53,934 --> 00:13:54,934
- Well I...
305
00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:02,685
Happy birthday oh boss o' mine.
306
00:14:02,709 --> 00:14:05,855
Hope this finds
you well and fine.
307
00:14:05,879 --> 00:14:09,058
That Henry Wadsworth
Longfellow was really prolific.
308
00:14:11,985 --> 00:14:13,830
- Oh Oliver, sit down.
309
00:14:13,854 --> 00:14:15,031
- Mhmm did you find the...
310
00:14:15,055 --> 00:14:17,834
- No no no Eb is
still looking for it.
311
00:14:17,858 --> 00:14:19,435
- Well what is it?
312
00:14:19,459 --> 00:14:23,228
- Close your eyes, I
have a surprise for you.
313
00:14:34,474 --> 00:14:36,652
Okay you can open it.
314
00:14:36,676 --> 00:14:38,109
- What are those?
315
00:14:39,012 --> 00:14:41,324
- Your birthday hot cakes.
316
00:14:41,348 --> 00:14:45,261
- Oh Lisa, I thought on my
birthday I could have a decent...
317
00:14:45,285 --> 00:14:47,897
- Make a wish and
blow out the candle.
318
00:14:47,921 --> 00:14:50,566
Did you get your wish?
319
00:14:50,590 --> 00:14:52,534
- No, they're still there.
320
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:55,104
- What does that mean?
321
00:14:55,128 --> 00:14:56,739
- Oh nothing.
322
00:14:56,763 --> 00:15:00,843
- Oh wait a moment, I
have to birthday them up.
323
00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:01,944
- What's that?
324
00:15:01,968 --> 00:15:03,579
- Chocolate syrup.
325
00:15:03,603 --> 00:15:04,603
- Chocolate?
326
00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:06,837
- Go on, eat.
327
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:11,075
Isn't that good?
328
00:15:13,079 --> 00:15:14,079
- Delicious.
329
00:15:17,650 --> 00:15:20,629
- You're not supposed
to eat the candle!
330
00:15:20,653 --> 00:15:22,498
- Oh no it's the best part.
331
00:15:22,522 --> 00:15:24,934
- Well Oliver really!
332
00:15:26,659 --> 00:15:27,825
- I'll get it.
333
00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:33,342
Ah Mr. Ziffel.
334
00:15:33,366 --> 00:15:34,777
- Happy birthday Mr. Douglas.
335
00:15:34,801 --> 00:15:35,878
- Thank you.
336
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:40,182
- Arnold says
happy birthday too.
337
00:15:40,206 --> 00:15:43,085
- Oh well thank you, come in.
338
00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:44,675
- Go on in, Arnold.
339
00:15:47,513 --> 00:15:51,060
Mr. Douglas, Arnold brought
you a birthday present.
340
00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:53,062
- Well, thank you very much.
341
00:15:53,086 --> 00:15:55,331
- You know today is
Arnold's birthday too.
342
00:15:55,355 --> 00:15:57,133
- Yes, happy birthday.
343
00:15:57,157 --> 00:16:00,002
- Aren't you gonna
give him a kiss?
344
00:16:00,026 --> 00:16:01,026
- No.
345
00:16:03,063 --> 00:16:05,308
- Arnold wants to
know what you got him.
346
00:16:05,332 --> 00:16:06,642
- I didn't get him anything.
347
00:16:08,634 --> 00:16:11,280
- Well I told you he wouldn't.
348
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:13,515
- Oh hello there Mr. Ziffel.
349
00:16:15,041 --> 00:16:17,420
Oh hello there Arnold!
350
00:16:17,444 --> 00:16:19,021
Happy birthday.
351
00:16:21,414 --> 00:16:22,591
What's that?
352
00:16:22,615 --> 00:16:24,526
- Oh this is a
present from Arnold.
353
00:16:24,550 --> 00:16:27,196
- And you didn't
get him anything.
354
00:16:27,220 --> 00:16:30,232
Oh you must feel
like a real cheapskate.
355
00:16:30,256 --> 00:16:33,336
- I am not a...
- Read the card!
356
00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:35,338
- Happy birthday oh
cheapskate o' mine.
357
00:16:38,298 --> 00:16:41,910
Hope this finds
you well and fine.
358
00:16:41,934 --> 00:16:43,534
- Open the present.
359
00:16:51,644 --> 00:16:52,688
What is that?
360
00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:54,756
- It's an electric snout warmer.
361
00:16:56,016 --> 00:16:59,150
- Oh it's just what
you always wanted.
362
00:17:00,420 --> 00:17:01,930
- I never.
363
00:17:01,954 --> 00:17:04,154
- Well he got two of 'em, he
thought you might want one.
364
00:17:05,591 --> 00:17:07,003
He says that you
can put the batteries
365
00:17:07,027 --> 00:17:08,737
under your vest you know, so...
366
00:17:08,761 --> 00:17:10,373
- I know how to wear it.
367
00:17:12,499 --> 00:17:13,709
- And now the main
reason I come over
368
00:17:13,733 --> 00:17:15,544
was to invite you
and Mrs. Douglas
369
00:17:15,568 --> 00:17:18,147
over to Arnold's
birthday party tonight.
370
00:17:18,171 --> 00:17:22,340
It's gonna be an informal
soiree, black tie as you know.
371
00:17:24,044 --> 00:17:25,488
- Black tie for a...
372
00:17:25,512 --> 00:17:28,224
- Thank you very much,
we'll be there, what time?
373
00:17:28,248 --> 00:17:29,691
- Eight o'clock.
374
00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:30,926
Come on Arnold.
375
00:17:32,752 --> 00:17:35,731
Arnold says you've got all
day to buy him a present.
376
00:17:35,755 --> 00:17:37,688
Yes goodbye!
377
00:17:39,092 --> 00:17:40,903
- What dress should I wear?
378
00:17:40,927 --> 00:17:42,104
- Lisa we're not going.
379
00:17:42,128 --> 00:17:43,372
- Oh yes we are.
380
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:45,074
- Oh no we're not.
381
00:17:45,098 --> 00:17:47,165
- We'll discuss it later.
382
00:17:56,776 --> 00:17:58,320
- Lisa what are
you dressed up for?
383
00:17:58,344 --> 00:18:01,290
- Arnold's party, I
laid out your tuxedo.
384
00:18:01,314 --> 00:18:03,225
- I told you I'm not going.
385
00:18:03,249 --> 00:18:04,660
- Oh but it will be fun.
386
00:18:04,684 --> 00:18:06,128
- No no Lisa I know
what you're up to
387
00:18:06,152 --> 00:18:08,097
and you're not getting
me out of this house.
388
00:18:08,121 --> 00:18:09,331
- Oh but Oliver...
389
00:18:09,355 --> 00:18:11,833
- If you want to go, you go.
390
00:18:11,857 --> 00:18:13,169
- What will you do?
391
00:18:13,193 --> 00:18:15,704
- I'll just sit in front
of the fire and read.
392
00:18:15,728 --> 00:18:17,306
- Oh won't you please come?
393
00:18:17,330 --> 00:18:18,707
- No thanks.
394
00:18:18,731 --> 00:18:20,609
- Well all right.
395
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:21,799
See you later.
396
00:18:37,817 --> 00:18:38,894
- Surprise!
397
00:18:38,918 --> 00:18:39,918
- Surprise.
398
00:18:41,488 --> 00:18:42,465
- Where is everybody?
399
00:18:42,489 --> 00:18:44,100
- There's nobody here but me.
400
00:18:44,124 --> 00:18:45,468
- Well happy birthday.
401
00:18:48,661 --> 00:18:51,507
- Mr. Kimball I'm not
having a birthday party.
402
00:18:51,531 --> 00:18:52,808
- Are you sure?
403
00:18:52,832 --> 00:18:54,176
The instructions I
got said to be here
404
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:56,245
promptly at nine o'clock.
405
00:18:56,269 --> 00:18:59,348
Be there promptly
at nine o'clock.
406
00:18:59,372 --> 00:19:01,250
Oh I see my mistake.
407
00:19:01,274 --> 00:19:02,551
I thought I was
supposed to be here,
408
00:19:02,575 --> 00:19:04,753
but I was supposed to be there.
409
00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:06,222
- Right.
410
00:19:06,246 --> 00:19:08,924
- You don't happen to
know where there is?
411
00:19:08,948 --> 00:19:12,060
- Well I imagine it's
over at the Ziffel's.
412
00:19:12,084 --> 00:19:13,329
- Why would they want
to hold a surprise party
413
00:19:13,353 --> 00:19:15,697
for you over there
when you're here?
414
00:19:15,721 --> 00:19:17,099
Well I better be going.
415
00:19:17,123 --> 00:19:18,200
Want to come with me?
416
00:19:18,224 --> 00:19:19,268
- No thanks.
417
00:19:19,292 --> 00:19:23,227
Well, happy birthday!
418
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:27,599
- That Lisa.
419
00:19:28,968 --> 00:19:31,079
I told her I didn't
want a surprise party,
420
00:19:31,103 --> 00:19:34,539
but well if she went
to all that trouble.
421
00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:54,192
- Well, here I am.
422
00:19:55,795 --> 00:19:57,562
- Well what about it?
423
00:19:58,898 --> 00:20:02,578
- Can't I come in so
everybody can yell surprise?
424
00:20:02,602 --> 00:20:06,770
- Nobody here to yell surprise
but me and Doris is asleep.
425
00:20:08,308 --> 00:20:09,985
- There's no
surprise party for me?
426
00:20:10,009 --> 00:20:11,487
- Nope.
427
00:20:11,511 --> 00:20:16,292
We had one for Arnold, but it
ended about three hours ago.
428
00:20:16,316 --> 00:20:18,093
- My wife isn't home yet.
429
00:20:18,117 --> 00:20:19,094
- Where'd she go?
430
00:20:19,118 --> 00:20:20,095
- She was here.
431
00:20:20,119 --> 00:20:21,885
- No she wasn't here.
432
00:20:22,922 --> 00:20:24,166
- Are you sure?
433
00:20:24,190 --> 00:20:25,190
- Positive.
434
00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:27,736
- That's funny.
435
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:29,104
- Then why ain't you laughing?
436
00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:33,342
- No I mean it's peculiar.
437
00:20:33,366 --> 00:20:34,366
Oh, I see.
438
00:20:36,202 --> 00:20:40,216
When I get home the
surprise party will be there.
439
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:43,173
- Well have a nice
time, goodnight.
440
00:20:50,149 --> 00:20:51,749
- Here I am, hello.
441
00:21:04,997 --> 00:21:05,997
Lisa, Lisa?
442
00:21:07,199 --> 00:21:08,199
Wake up.
443
00:21:09,302 --> 00:21:10,312
- What?
444
00:21:10,336 --> 00:21:11,847
Where have you been?
445
00:21:11,871 --> 00:21:13,682
- Never mind that,
where have you been?
446
00:21:13,706 --> 00:21:14,916
- You tell me where you've been
447
00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:17,919
and I'll tell you
where I've been.
448
00:21:17,943 --> 00:21:19,755
- I was out looking for you.
449
00:21:19,779 --> 00:21:23,191
- You had to put on
your tuxedo for that?
450
00:21:23,215 --> 00:21:24,593
- Well I decided to
go over to the Ziffels
451
00:21:24,617 --> 00:21:27,129
and I thought...
- I didn't see you there.
452
00:21:27,153 --> 00:21:29,598
- Yeah that's because
you weren't there.
453
00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:30,733
- Who said?
454
00:21:30,757 --> 00:21:32,167
- Mr. Ziffel.
455
00:21:32,191 --> 00:21:33,736
He said you never showed up.
456
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:35,493
- Oh, well goodnight.
457
00:21:36,996 --> 00:21:38,907
- Wait just a second here.
458
00:21:38,931 --> 00:21:40,008
Where were you?
459
00:21:40,032 --> 00:21:42,344
- I was at the Ziffels party.
460
00:21:42,368 --> 00:21:43,368
- Lisa!
461
00:21:44,671 --> 00:21:47,048
- If you don't believe me,
let's go over to the Ziffels
462
00:21:47,072 --> 00:21:48,717
and I'll prove it to you.
463
00:21:48,741 --> 00:21:51,920
- By the time you
get dressed again...
464
00:21:53,379 --> 00:21:54,379
- What?
465
00:21:55,782 --> 00:21:59,383
Oh yeah, all right
let's go to the Ziffels.
466
00:22:03,389 --> 00:22:04,866
- Oliver, Oliver
it's dark in there!
467
00:22:04,890 --> 00:22:07,135
I don't think you
ought to wake them up.
468
00:22:07,159 --> 00:22:10,160
- I have a feeling
nobody will mind.
469
00:22:14,233 --> 00:22:15,811
Here I am again.
470
00:22:15,835 --> 00:22:19,448
- I wish you'd sober up
and let me get some sleep.
471
00:22:19,472 --> 00:22:20,571
- I am sober.
472
00:22:21,741 --> 00:22:23,952
- Oh hi Mrs. Douglas,
we sure had a great time
473
00:22:23,976 --> 00:22:25,354
at the party didn't we?
474
00:22:25,378 --> 00:22:27,878
- Yes it was a real ding wing.
475
00:22:29,281 --> 00:22:31,827
- Mr. Ziffel you told me my
wife didn't come to your party.
476
00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:33,729
- I said that?
477
00:22:33,753 --> 00:22:35,197
- Yes!
478
00:22:35,221 --> 00:22:38,200
- Now why would he say
that when I was at the party?
479
00:22:38,224 --> 00:22:39,668
- I don't know!
480
00:22:39,692 --> 00:22:40,902
- Mr. Douglas, take my advice
481
00:22:40,926 --> 00:22:42,438
and go home and sleep it off.
482
00:22:45,531 --> 00:22:48,043
- Well, anybody else
you want to wake up?
483
00:22:48,067 --> 00:22:49,067
- No!
484
00:22:50,135 --> 00:22:51,301
Let's go home.
485
00:22:52,772 --> 00:22:54,249
Well Lisa you really fooled me.
486
00:22:54,273 --> 00:22:55,784
- How's that?
487
00:22:55,808 --> 00:22:58,320
- Well I thought you were
having a surprise party
488
00:22:58,344 --> 00:23:00,322
for me over at the Ziffels
489
00:23:00,346 --> 00:23:02,157
I went over there,
there's nobody there.
490
00:23:02,181 --> 00:23:04,226
Then I thought when
I came back here...
491
00:23:04,250 --> 00:23:06,762
- Well Oliver you said you
didn't want a surprise party
492
00:23:06,786 --> 00:23:08,564
so I didn't give you one.
493
00:23:08,588 --> 00:23:10,966
You're the master,
and I'm the slave.
494
00:23:10,990 --> 00:23:12,934
I am yours to command.
495
00:23:12,958 --> 00:23:14,169
Anything you want.
496
00:23:14,193 --> 00:23:15,437
- Yeah well...
497
00:23:15,461 --> 00:23:16,938
- Why don't we go
inside the house?
498
00:23:16,962 --> 00:23:17,962
- Yeah.
499
00:23:27,874 --> 00:23:29,106
Well here I am.
500
00:23:29,975 --> 00:23:31,920
- Why do you keep saying that?
501
00:23:31,944 --> 00:23:36,113
- So that when I turn on
the light everybody can...
502
00:23:38,518 --> 00:23:40,729
What, they did it again!
503
00:23:40,753 --> 00:23:42,820
They stole our furniture!
504
00:23:45,491 --> 00:23:48,370
You and your surprise party.
505
00:23:48,394 --> 00:23:51,373
- Well it's all your fault.
506
00:23:51,397 --> 00:23:52,641
If you had gone along with it
507
00:23:52,665 --> 00:23:54,976
I could have given
you the party right here,
508
00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:56,645
instead of going
through all that stuff
509
00:23:56,669 --> 00:23:58,680
to take you to the Ziffels.
510
00:23:58,704 --> 00:24:00,816
- Yeah yeah it was all my fault.
511
00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:03,251
- And if you had taken
the present yesterday
512
00:24:03,275 --> 00:24:04,920
when I wanted to give it to you,
513
00:24:04,944 --> 00:24:08,524
then my present wouldn't
have eaten up Eb's present
514
00:24:08,548 --> 00:24:09,780
and flown away.
515
00:24:10,650 --> 00:24:11,660
- Well I don't know what it was,
516
00:24:11,684 --> 00:24:13,896
but I'm glad it flew away.
517
00:24:13,920 --> 00:24:17,098
- Well I'll have to give
you something else.
518
00:24:17,122 --> 00:24:18,366
What is it you
would like to have
519
00:24:18,390 --> 00:24:20,569
more than anything
else in the world?
520
00:24:20,593 --> 00:24:21,593
- A bed.
521
00:24:22,595 --> 00:24:25,541
- Oh, do you want
a king size bed?
522
00:24:25,565 --> 00:24:28,744
- No twin beds, one
in this room for you
523
00:24:28,768 --> 00:24:32,937
and one in the other room
for me so I can get some sleep.
524
00:24:33,940 --> 00:24:35,250
- Oliver!
525
00:24:35,274 --> 00:24:36,518
- What?
526
00:24:36,542 --> 00:24:38,219
- How old were
you on this birthday?
527
00:24:40,813 --> 00:24:42,390
- Goodnight.
528
00:25:25,825 --> 00:25:29,994
This has been a Filmways
presentation darling.
34908
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof