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♪ Green Acres is the place to be
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♪ Farm livin' is the life for me
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Land spreadin'
out so far and wide
4
00:00:30,164 --> 00:00:34,211
♪ Keep Manhattan, just
give me that countryside
5
00:00:34,235 --> 00:00:38,048
♪ New York is
where I'd rather stay
6
00:00:38,072 --> 00:00:41,885
♪ I get allergic smelling hay
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00:00:41,909 --> 00:00:45,755
♪ I just adore a penthouse view
8
00:00:45,779 --> 00:00:49,948
♪ Darling I love you
but give me Park Avenue
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00:00:51,318 --> 00:00:57,434
♪ The chores ♪
The stores ♪ Fresh air
10
00:00:57,458 --> 00:01:00,037
♪ Times Square ♪ You are my wife
11
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♪ Good bye, city life
12
00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:05,497
♪ Green Acres we are there
13
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Lulu!
14
00:01:19,180 --> 00:01:21,058
Where is Lulu?
15
00:01:21,082 --> 00:01:22,625
Lulu!
16
00:01:22,649 --> 00:01:23,460
- Lisa.
17
00:01:23,484 --> 00:01:24,561
- Well, hello there.
18
00:01:24,585 --> 00:01:25,929
You're not Lulu.
19
00:01:26,787 --> 00:01:27,597
- Who's Lulu?
20
00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:29,121
- The new chicken.
21
00:01:30,291 --> 00:01:31,101
- The new.
22
00:01:31,125 --> 00:01:32,291
Lisa.
23
00:01:34,027 --> 00:01:36,373
- Oh, there you are, Lulu.
24
00:01:36,397 --> 00:01:37,407
- What?
25
00:01:37,431 --> 00:01:39,376
- Would you care to join us?
26
00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:41,078
Coming, Lisa.
27
00:01:42,336 --> 00:01:43,680
Hello there.
28
00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:45,182
- That's a parrot.
29
00:01:45,206 --> 00:01:46,450
- Don't tell her.
30
00:01:46,474 --> 00:01:48,485
She thinks she's
a talking chicken.
31
00:01:49,643 --> 00:01:50,920
- Well that's the most.
32
00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:53,090
- Every day she comes over here
33
00:01:53,114 --> 00:01:56,493
and she lays an egg
with the other girls.
34
00:01:56,517 --> 00:01:57,794
- How could she lay an egg?
35
00:01:57,818 --> 00:01:58,861
- It ain't easy.
36
00:02:00,654 --> 00:02:02,065
- She's a friend of Alice's.
37
00:02:02,089 --> 00:02:04,267
She flew in all the way
from South America
38
00:02:04,291 --> 00:02:07,003
and Alice invited her to stay.
39
00:02:07,027 --> 00:02:08,405
- South America?
40
00:02:08,429 --> 00:02:09,772
Si, senor.
41
00:02:10,998 --> 00:02:12,242
- Of all the.
42
00:02:12,266 --> 00:02:13,977
- She speaks French too.
43
00:02:14,001 --> 00:02:15,145
- French?
44
00:02:15,169 --> 00:02:16,646
- Oui, monsieur.
45
00:02:17,771 --> 00:02:19,949
- She talks seven languages.
46
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,184
- Fine.
47
00:02:21,208 --> 00:02:24,654
- Alright, girls, you can
go back to play now.
48
00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:27,491
- Yeah, good bye.
49
00:02:30,417 --> 00:02:32,395
- Did you want to talk
to me about something?
50
00:02:32,419 --> 00:02:34,831
- Yeah, how'd you like to
go on a picnic on Sunday?
51
00:02:34,855 --> 00:02:36,666
- Is that what you
wanted to ask me?
52
00:02:36,690 --> 00:02:37,900
- Uh-huh.
53
00:02:37,924 --> 00:02:40,003
- See you around
the barnyard, Charlie.
54
00:02:41,061 --> 00:02:42,405
- Now, wait a second.
55
00:02:42,429 --> 00:02:44,274
I thought you might enjoy it.
56
00:02:44,298 --> 00:02:49,012
We'll find a little spot under
a tree, alongside a stream,
57
00:02:49,036 --> 00:02:52,582
take a little lunch,
just the two of us.
58
00:02:52,606 --> 00:02:53,483
- Just the two of us?
59
00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:54,451
- Yeah.
60
00:02:54,475 --> 00:02:55,985
- Can we get a little smooching?
61
00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:57,154
- Yeah.
62
00:02:57,178 --> 00:02:58,588
- You're a dirty old man.
63
00:02:59,980 --> 00:03:01,891
Lisa.
64
00:03:01,915 --> 00:03:04,327
- What is your preposition now?
65
00:03:04,351 --> 00:03:05,517
- Proposition.
66
00:03:06,453 --> 00:03:08,765
- You are a dirty old man.
67
00:03:08,789 --> 00:03:12,569
- Would you like to go on a
picnic with a dirty old man?
68
00:03:12,593 --> 00:03:13,570
- Who?
- Me.
69
00:03:13,594 --> 00:03:14,737
- I'd love to.
70
00:03:15,962 --> 00:03:17,574
- What was all that about...
71
00:03:19,233 --> 00:03:21,311
- What do we need
to take to a picnic?
72
00:03:21,335 --> 00:03:22,479
- Don't move.
73
00:03:26,307 --> 00:03:27,584
- Hello there, Mr. Haney.
74
00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:28,618
- You moved.
75
00:03:29,476 --> 00:03:33,089
- Look...
- May I take your picnic order?
76
00:03:33,113 --> 00:03:34,113
- Mr. Haney,
77
00:03:35,282 --> 00:03:37,594
we just decided
to have a picnic.
78
00:03:37,618 --> 00:03:39,329
How did you find out about it?
79
00:03:39,353 --> 00:03:40,497
- Lulu called me.
80
00:03:41,622 --> 00:03:42,432
- Lulu?
81
00:03:42,456 --> 00:03:43,567
- Si, senor.
82
00:03:44,791 --> 00:03:47,704
- I told you she could
use the telephone.
83
00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:50,907
- Now, I suppose
you want the A picnic.
84
00:03:50,931 --> 00:03:52,008
- What is that?
85
00:03:52,032 --> 00:03:53,032
- $45.
86
00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:55,067
- $45?
87
00:03:55,769 --> 00:03:57,480
- What do we get for that?
88
00:03:57,504 --> 00:03:58,515
- Follow me.
89
00:04:05,178 --> 00:04:07,490
First of all you
get this deluxe,
90
00:04:07,514 --> 00:04:09,848
folding table and chair set.
91
00:04:12,319 --> 00:04:13,830
- How do you get it apart?
92
00:04:13,854 --> 00:04:16,165
- Well, I'm not
permitted to divulge that
93
00:04:16,189 --> 00:04:18,301
until I get the $45.
94
00:04:19,727 --> 00:04:20,937
- I am not paying...
95
00:04:20,961 --> 00:04:22,639
- Now in addition to
the aforementioned
96
00:04:22,663 --> 00:04:26,732
table and chair set the
A selection also includes
97
00:04:28,269 --> 00:04:30,602
this genuine mohair blanket.
98
00:04:31,472 --> 00:04:34,150
Just feel how soft Mo's hair is.
99
00:04:35,842 --> 00:04:38,355
- You should be
ashamed of yourself.
100
00:04:38,379 --> 00:04:39,188
- Why?
101
00:04:39,212 --> 00:04:41,023
Mo does have soft hair.
102
00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:43,126
- Lisa.
103
00:04:43,150 --> 00:04:44,894
- Now once you have
spread your blanket,
104
00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:46,763
set up your table and chairs,
105
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:48,298
you're ready for your lunch.
106
00:04:48,322 --> 00:04:52,602
This consists of a bag
of fried chicken parts
107
00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:56,695
with each part plainly
identified by a small tag.
108
00:04:58,999 --> 00:05:00,610
- That's handy.
109
00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:02,479
- That's ridiculous.
110
00:05:02,503 --> 00:05:05,715
- In addition to the
assorted chicken parts,
111
00:05:05,739 --> 00:05:08,640
you get one dozen
hard boiled eggs.
112
00:05:11,044 --> 00:05:13,055
- Oh, they're all
different colors.
113
00:05:13,079 --> 00:05:15,024
- Well that so if you
have any leftover
114
00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:17,193
you can use 'em at Easter.
115
00:05:18,419 --> 00:05:19,429
- That's clever.
116
00:05:19,453 --> 00:05:20,697
- That's stupid.
117
00:05:21,922 --> 00:05:23,966
- Now the picnic
basket also contains
118
00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:26,825
this plastic
chocolate layer cake.
119
00:05:28,395 --> 00:05:29,872
- What's that for?
120
00:05:29,896 --> 00:05:31,675
- I'm glad you asked that.
121
00:05:31,699 --> 00:05:33,976
- You would have
told her anyway.
122
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:37,001
- This is my
patented ant attractor.
123
00:05:37,871 --> 00:05:40,049
You just place it on the ground,
124
00:05:40,073 --> 00:05:43,520
at least five feet away
from where you're eating,
125
00:05:43,544 --> 00:05:47,123
and the ants are attracted
by the lifelike look of the cake.
126
00:05:47,147 --> 00:05:49,192
And while you eat in peace
127
00:05:49,216 --> 00:05:52,094
they're breaking their
little teeth from the plastic.
128
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:56,265
- Now that is really silly.
129
00:05:58,559 --> 00:05:59,769
- Poor little nipper,
130
00:05:59,793 --> 00:06:02,605
he'll have to gum his
way back to the anthill.
131
00:06:03,930 --> 00:06:05,029
- Oh brother.
132
00:06:06,132 --> 00:06:08,978
- Now for the
liquid refreshments.
133
00:06:09,002 --> 00:06:13,171
I have several bottles of
champagne, vintage 1982,
134
00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:17,253
which they tell me is
gonna be a very fine year.
135
00:06:18,512 --> 00:06:20,323
- Why don't you
come back in 1982
136
00:06:20,347 --> 00:06:22,525
and we'll see if you were right?
137
00:06:22,549 --> 00:06:23,715
Come on, Lisa.
138
00:06:24,752 --> 00:06:25,928
What are you doing?
139
00:06:25,952 --> 00:06:28,264
- Making out the
list for the picnic.
140
00:06:28,288 --> 00:06:30,767
- It's gonna be fun,
just the two of us.
141
00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:33,603
This'll be the first outing we've
had since we've been here.
142
00:06:33,627 --> 00:06:35,672
- Which China do
you want to take?
143
00:06:35,696 --> 00:06:38,575
- You don't take China,
you take paper plates.
144
00:06:38,599 --> 00:06:40,977
- Oh, it's gonna be one
of those cheesy picnics.
145
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:43,446
- No, you always
use paper plates.
146
00:06:43,470 --> 00:06:44,848
Is this all we have?
147
00:06:44,872 --> 00:06:45,872
- Mm-hmm.
148
00:06:46,807 --> 00:06:48,918
- We had a whole
package of them last week.
149
00:06:48,942 --> 00:06:50,186
What happened to them?
150
00:06:50,210 --> 00:06:52,021
- Remember the tortillas
we had the other night?
151
00:06:52,045 --> 00:06:53,222
- Yeah.
152
00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:55,892
- And you said
they were so good.
153
00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:56,993
- You mean?
154
00:06:57,017 --> 00:06:58,160
- Si, senor.
155
00:06:59,420 --> 00:07:02,120
- Mr. Douglas I... Oh boy!
156
00:07:03,390 --> 00:07:05,301
Are we gonna have
tortillas again tonight?
157
00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,438
- No, we're not.
158
00:07:08,462 --> 00:07:11,240
- We're going to use those
for the picnic on Sunday.
159
00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:13,142
- Golly, a picnic.
160
00:07:13,166 --> 00:07:15,044
Where are we going?
161
00:07:15,068 --> 00:07:17,480
- Eb, I don't believe
anybody invited you.
162
00:07:17,504 --> 00:07:20,082
- I don't need an invitation,
I'm one of the family.
163
00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:24,220
- Yes you do, and no you're not.
164
00:07:24,244 --> 00:07:25,588
- That ain't fair.
165
00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:26,656
- That's right.
166
00:07:26,680 --> 00:07:28,591
It isn't fair.
167
00:07:28,615 --> 00:07:32,562
- Lisa, the idea was to
spend the day by ourselves.
168
00:07:32,586 --> 00:07:33,763
I don't see anything wrong
169
00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:35,632
if he comes along with us.
170
00:07:35,656 --> 00:07:37,133
- I won't get in your way.
171
00:07:37,157 --> 00:07:39,302
I'll just eat my potato
salad, drink my champagne,
172
00:07:39,326 --> 00:07:41,070
and listen to the ants
breaking their teeth
173
00:07:41,094 --> 00:07:42,639
on the plastic chocolate cake.
174
00:07:43,864 --> 00:07:47,209
- Oh, Oliver, why don't
we take him with us?
175
00:07:47,233 --> 00:07:48,578
- Please, daddy dear?
176
00:07:48,602 --> 00:07:50,580
Please, please, please?
177
00:07:50,604 --> 00:07:53,583
- Alright you can come along!
178
00:07:53,607 --> 00:07:55,418
But after lunch I want
you to take a walk
179
00:07:55,442 --> 00:07:57,954
or go fishing or someplace,
just leave us alone.
180
00:07:57,978 --> 00:07:58,978
- I will.
181
00:07:59,947 --> 00:08:02,358
And thank you,
thank you, thank you.
182
00:08:02,382 --> 00:08:04,627
I'm a lucky kid to
have such a fine father.
183
00:08:07,921 --> 00:08:10,199
- Why did you have to ask him?
184
00:08:10,223 --> 00:08:12,234
- Well, Oliver, it
will be a lot more fun
185
00:08:12,258 --> 00:08:15,371
to go on a picnic
in a family way.
186
00:08:24,304 --> 00:08:26,716
- Mayonnaise,
potatoes for your salad,
187
00:08:26,740 --> 00:08:29,407
pickles, sandwich bread, cheese.
188
00:08:30,410 --> 00:08:32,088
Did I forget anything?
189
00:08:32,112 --> 00:08:33,756
- Where are the paper plates?
190
00:08:33,780 --> 00:08:35,191
- Oh, I'm all out of those.
191
00:08:35,215 --> 00:08:37,727
But a lot of folks use
tortillas for paper plates.
192
00:08:38,785 --> 00:08:39,996
- Tortillas?
193
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,464
- How many of 'em
would you want?
194
00:08:41,488 --> 00:08:42,932
- That will be enough.
195
00:08:42,956 --> 00:08:44,834
There are only
three of us going.
196
00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:46,936
- Oh, just three of you, huh?
197
00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:47,904
- That's right.
198
00:08:47,928 --> 00:08:49,438
- Small picnics are the best.
199
00:08:49,462 --> 00:08:52,008
Just three of you, huh?
200
00:08:52,032 --> 00:08:54,577
- Yeah, that's...
- I love picnics.
201
00:08:54,601 --> 00:08:57,179
I haven't been
on a picnic since...
202
00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:58,347
Just three of you, huh?
203
00:08:59,673 --> 00:09:02,919
- Mr. Drucker, we'd
like to invite you but...
204
00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:05,187
- No, no, no, I wasn't hinting.
205
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:08,791
No, if you're gonna have a
picnic three is a good number.
206
00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:10,026
- Yeah, well...
207
00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:11,260
- 'Course four is
a better number,
208
00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:12,395
that way you can pair it up.
209
00:09:12,419 --> 00:09:13,419
Two and two.
210
00:09:14,821 --> 00:09:17,333
- I don't think you'd
enjoy pairing up with Eb.
211
00:09:17,357 --> 00:09:18,801
- Why not?
212
00:09:18,825 --> 00:09:21,938
- Mr. Drucker, would you
like to come along with us?
213
00:09:21,962 --> 00:09:22,772
- I'd love to.
214
00:09:22,796 --> 00:09:23,706
When are you going?
215
00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:25,307
- This Sunday.
216
00:09:25,331 --> 00:09:26,809
- Sunday?
217
00:09:26,833 --> 00:09:29,245
Doggone it, I've been invited
to the Wheeler's for supper.
218
00:09:29,269 --> 00:09:30,702
- That's a shame.
219
00:09:31,872 --> 00:09:32,982
- 'Course I might be able to...
220
00:09:33,006 --> 00:09:34,250
- No, no, no.
221
00:09:34,274 --> 00:09:37,086
We wouldn't want you
to do that to the Wheelers.
222
00:09:37,110 --> 00:09:38,354
- I guess not.
223
00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:40,823
Well, I'll just put this
stuff in a sack for you.
224
00:09:40,847 --> 00:09:44,360
By the way, what are you
doing about ants at the picnic?
225
00:09:44,384 --> 00:09:46,262
- I didn't think we
had to do anything.
226
00:09:46,286 --> 00:09:48,598
I thought there would
be enough of them there.
227
00:09:50,356 --> 00:09:53,937
- No, I mean what are you
gonna do to get rid of the ants?
228
00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:56,906
- Well, Mr. Haney had a
plastic chocolate cake made...
229
00:09:56,930 --> 00:09:59,442
- Oh that Haney and
his phony gimmicks.
230
00:09:59,466 --> 00:10:02,645
Now I have a sponge
rubber cherry pie.
231
00:10:02,669 --> 00:10:05,081
If the smell don't get
'em, the sound does.
232
00:10:07,340 --> 00:10:09,318
That's their mating call.
233
00:10:10,877 --> 00:10:13,923
- Just put all that stuff in
a sack and that'll be fine.
234
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,625
- Yes, sir.
235
00:10:15,649 --> 00:10:17,660
- Do you want me to help
you with the groceries?
236
00:10:17,684 --> 00:10:18,761
- No, no, I'll get them.
237
00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:23,600
- Hi, Mr. Douglas.
238
00:10:23,624 --> 00:10:25,023
- Hi, Mr. Kimble.
239
00:10:27,894 --> 00:10:28,738
- Need a hand?
240
00:10:28,762 --> 00:10:30,161
- Yes, thank you.
241
00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:35,277
Here you are.
242
00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:36,746
- Oh you.
243
00:10:36,770 --> 00:10:38,214
- Dropped off a scarecrow
over at Ben Miller's.
244
00:10:38,238 --> 00:10:40,182
Boy, I never thought
I'd find a use for it.
245
00:10:41,441 --> 00:10:43,185
- Would you mind
taking one of these?
246
00:10:43,209 --> 00:10:44,643
- Oh, not at all.
247
00:10:46,079 --> 00:10:48,457
Gee, thanks, now I won't
have to go shopping this week.
248
00:10:49,582 --> 00:10:50,827
- No, I didn't mean...
249
00:10:50,851 --> 00:10:53,630
Look, all I wanted you
to do is give me a hand.
250
00:10:53,654 --> 00:10:54,497
- Here you are.
251
00:10:54,521 --> 00:10:56,232
- I don't want that!
252
00:10:56,256 --> 00:10:58,200
Give me the groceries.
253
00:10:58,224 --> 00:11:00,737
- Sponge rubber cherry pie.
254
00:11:01,962 --> 00:11:03,906
My mother bakes
these all the time.
255
00:11:03,930 --> 00:11:05,875
She doesn't bake 'em
she vulcanizes them.
256
00:11:07,134 --> 00:11:08,774
Yeah, they're great
if you got soft teeth.
257
00:11:10,037 --> 00:11:11,280
- Will you please...
258
00:11:11,304 --> 00:11:13,049
- You know these make
great ant decoys too.
259
00:11:13,073 --> 00:11:14,583
- Ant decoys?
260
00:11:14,607 --> 00:11:16,085
- Yeah, you put
'em on the ground
261
00:11:16,109 --> 00:11:17,987
and the ants bite into them
and the rubber springs up
262
00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:19,455
and dislocates their jaws.
263
00:11:20,413 --> 00:11:21,590
- I'll remember that.
264
00:11:21,614 --> 00:11:23,259
- Remember what?
265
00:11:23,283 --> 00:11:24,794
- About the...
266
00:11:24,818 --> 00:11:26,462
- Say, these pies are great
if you're going on a picnic.
267
00:11:26,486 --> 00:11:27,296
- We are.
268
00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:28,131
- Where ya going?
269
00:11:28,155 --> 00:11:29,766
- We don't know yet.
270
00:11:29,790 --> 00:11:34,170
- Say, if you want a good
picnic spot I know just the place.
271
00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:36,072
It has all these
beautiful trees,
272
00:11:36,096 --> 00:11:38,541
a stream running
through it, a waterfall.
273
00:11:38,565 --> 00:11:39,676
- That sounds perfect.
274
00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:40,609
Where's that?
275
00:11:40,633 --> 00:11:41,753
- Yellowstone National Park.
276
00:11:44,237 --> 00:11:46,716
- Is there any place around
here that you know of?
277
00:11:46,740 --> 00:11:48,651
- How about Meddy's Moodows?
278
00:11:48,675 --> 00:11:50,820
Oh no, that's Mooney's Meadows.
279
00:11:50,844 --> 00:11:52,922
That's got a stream
running through it too.
280
00:11:52,946 --> 00:11:55,024
Well, not running,
it's more like crawling.
281
00:11:56,516 --> 00:11:58,494
It isn't crawling either.
282
00:11:58,518 --> 00:11:59,929
It's dried up that's what it is.
283
00:12:01,054 --> 00:12:02,264
- Thanks but...
284
00:12:02,288 --> 00:12:04,767
- The only other place
I know with water is...
285
00:12:04,791 --> 00:12:06,069
No, that's the Atlantic ocean.
286
00:12:07,493 --> 00:12:09,038
- We'll find a place.
287
00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:10,272
- I'm sure you will.
288
00:12:10,296 --> 00:12:11,307
Say, when is this picnic?
289
00:12:11,331 --> 00:12:12,541
- On Sunday.
290
00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:13,509
- You couldn't make
it Saturday could you?
291
00:12:13,533 --> 00:12:14,844
I got a date Sunday.
292
00:12:15,702 --> 00:12:16,713
- That's a shame.
293
00:12:16,737 --> 00:12:18,547
- Maybe I can get out of it.
294
00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:20,950
- Well, don't bother, it's
not a big picnic, Mr. Kimble.
295
00:12:20,974 --> 00:12:22,384
Just three of us.
296
00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:24,453
- I understand.
297
00:12:24,477 --> 00:12:26,155
No, I don't understand.
298
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:28,257
- Don't worry about it.
299
00:12:28,281 --> 00:12:30,392
Just you keep your date.
300
00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:31,416
- Yes, sir.
301
00:12:33,954 --> 00:12:34,931
Mr. Douglas?
- Yeah?
302
00:12:34,955 --> 00:12:36,699
- One question.
- Uh-huh?
303
00:12:36,723 --> 00:12:39,301
- You don't happen to know
who I have a date with, do ya?
304
00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:41,793
- Sophia Loren.
305
00:12:43,830 --> 00:12:44,830
- Si, senor.
306
00:12:50,270 --> 00:12:51,814
- Lisa, we ought to get started.
307
00:12:51,838 --> 00:12:53,716
- Do you think I have
enough sandwiches?
308
00:12:53,740 --> 00:12:54,817
- How many did you make?
309
00:12:54,841 --> 00:12:57,120
- I've got six ham and jelly,
310
00:12:57,144 --> 00:12:59,521
six peanut butter
and liverwurst.
311
00:12:59,545 --> 00:13:02,725
Or was it liverwurst
and the jelly?
312
00:13:02,749 --> 00:13:05,027
No, the jelly's mixed
up in the tuna fish,
313
00:13:05,051 --> 00:13:08,197
so the liverwurst must have
the egg salad on top of it.
314
00:13:09,222 --> 00:13:10,800
- I think I'm gonna be sick.
315
00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:13,391
- Need any help?
316
00:13:14,527 --> 00:13:15,872
- No.
317
00:13:15,896 --> 00:13:17,406
I think you do.
318
00:13:17,430 --> 00:13:18,941
What are you made up for?
319
00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:20,609
- I bought me a picnic suit.
320
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,211
The butterfly net came with it.
321
00:13:22,235 --> 00:13:23,913
- I think you look very nice.
322
00:13:23,937 --> 00:13:25,148
- Fine, fine.
323
00:13:25,172 --> 00:13:26,715
Alright, let's get
this stuff out...
324
00:13:26,739 --> 00:13:28,785
- Did you make the liverwurst
and jelly sandwiches for me?
325
00:13:28,809 --> 00:13:29,919
- Six of them.
326
00:13:29,943 --> 00:13:32,255
- On raisin bread with ketchup?
327
00:13:32,279 --> 00:13:35,858
- Please, my stomach
just quieted down.
328
00:13:35,882 --> 00:13:38,294
Did you find a spot for
us to have this picnic?
329
00:13:38,318 --> 00:13:39,528
- Yes, sir.
330
00:13:39,552 --> 00:13:41,330
The most romantic
spot in the whole county.
331
00:13:41,354 --> 00:13:43,732
It's right at the foot
of Lover's Leap.
332
00:13:43,756 --> 00:13:44,667
- Oh fine.
333
00:13:44,691 --> 00:13:45,868
- We'll have it all to ourselves
334
00:13:45,892 --> 00:13:47,636
unless some lover
decides to leap on us.
335
00:13:49,296 --> 00:13:51,607
- That's alright, we've
got enough sandwiches.
336
00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:54,811
- Let's get going.
337
00:13:54,835 --> 00:13:56,012
- Oh, by the way, Mr. Douglas,
338
00:13:56,036 --> 00:13:58,848
on the way can we
stop at Linda's house?
339
00:13:58,872 --> 00:13:59,682
- What for?
340
00:13:59,706 --> 00:14:00,783
- To pick her up.
341
00:14:00,807 --> 00:14:02,251
- What?
342
00:14:02,275 --> 00:14:05,822
- I figured since you're taking
a friend I oughta take one.
343
00:14:05,846 --> 00:14:09,192
- Eb, I told you this
is a family picnic.
344
00:14:09,216 --> 00:14:11,027
- Well, Linda's in a family way.
345
00:14:13,553 --> 00:14:15,031
- What?
346
00:14:15,055 --> 00:14:17,266
- I might marry her someday
and she'll be in a family.
347
00:14:18,959 --> 00:14:19,959
- Oh.
348
00:14:20,861 --> 00:14:23,806
- Oliver, you're schvitzing.
349
00:14:23,830 --> 00:14:25,041
- Yeah, well.
350
00:14:25,065 --> 00:14:26,876
- Why we'll be
glad to pick her up.
351
00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:28,344
- Yeah, yeah fine.
352
00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:29,879
Look, this started to be a
picnic just for the two of us
353
00:14:29,903 --> 00:14:31,613
now we got him
and his girlfriend.
354
00:14:31,637 --> 00:14:32,882
- Four is a nice number.
355
00:14:32,906 --> 00:14:35,684
We're going to have
a wonderful time.
356
00:14:35,708 --> 00:14:40,589
- Linda, I won't you to meet
my folks, Mr. and Mrs. Douglas.
357
00:14:40,613 --> 00:14:42,959
- We're not your...
Hello, Linda.
358
00:14:42,983 --> 00:14:45,328
- It's a pleasure to meet you.
359
00:14:45,352 --> 00:14:46,595
- It's a pleasure.
360
00:14:46,619 --> 00:14:48,097
Will you climb in,
we'll get started.
361
00:14:48,121 --> 00:14:50,366
- I'll be right with you, I
have to get my accordion.
362
00:14:51,524 --> 00:14:52,735
- Accordion?
363
00:14:52,759 --> 00:14:55,171
- Yeah, she plays a
mean squeeze box.
364
00:14:55,195 --> 00:14:56,638
- Hiya, Eb.
365
00:14:56,662 --> 00:14:58,407
- Oh, Mr. Wheeler, I
want you to meet my folks,
366
00:14:58,431 --> 00:15:00,642
Mr. and Mrs. Douglas.
367
00:15:00,666 --> 00:15:03,312
- Will you stop...
- How do you do?
368
00:15:03,336 --> 00:15:05,081
- Where are we
going on this picnic?
369
00:15:05,105 --> 00:15:06,048
- We?
370
00:15:06,072 --> 00:15:07,449
I don't mean to be impolite
371
00:15:07,473 --> 00:15:09,385
but we originally
planned this picnic
372
00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:10,853
for my wife and myself
373
00:15:10,877 --> 00:15:13,256
and then Eb
invited himself along
374
00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:15,591
and then he rang
in your daughter...
375
00:15:15,615 --> 00:15:17,293
- You don't think
I'd let my daughter
376
00:15:17,317 --> 00:15:21,230
go on a picnic somewhere
with a strange boy?
377
00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:23,599
- Oh, Eb's not a strange...
378
00:15:23,623 --> 00:15:26,102
Well, yeah, yeah, I guess
you could call him that.
379
00:15:27,627 --> 00:15:31,774
- No, sir, Linda's not going
anywhere with a chaperone.
380
00:15:31,798 --> 00:15:33,009
When you got a daughter,
381
00:15:33,033 --> 00:15:35,211
you gotta protect
her every minute
382
00:15:35,235 --> 00:15:37,046
when she goes out with a boy.
383
00:15:38,571 --> 00:15:40,383
- You can trust Eb.
384
00:15:40,407 --> 00:15:41,483
- No he can't.
385
00:15:42,342 --> 00:15:43,552
- Eb, will you...
386
00:15:43,576 --> 00:15:45,454
- I'll get my coat and
I'll be right with you.
387
00:15:45,478 --> 00:15:47,156
- Nice fella, ain't he?
388
00:15:47,180 --> 00:15:48,624
- I'm sure he is.
389
00:15:48,648 --> 00:15:51,961
- My father always went
along when I went out with you.
390
00:15:51,985 --> 00:15:53,695
- He was just freeloading.
391
00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:59,001
- Mr. and Mrs. Douglas,
this is my mother.
392
00:15:59,025 --> 00:16:01,103
- How do you do, Mrs. Wheeler?
393
00:16:01,127 --> 00:16:02,538
- How do you do?
394
00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:05,074
It's very nice of you to
invite all of us to go with you.
395
00:16:06,232 --> 00:16:09,312
- I didn't...
- Let me help you with those.
396
00:16:11,071 --> 00:16:12,949
- Can't you fold that thing up?
397
00:16:12,973 --> 00:16:13,973
- Yes, sir.
398
00:16:15,408 --> 00:16:16,986
- All set.
399
00:16:17,010 --> 00:16:19,221
Mr. Douglas, do you mind
stopping by Drucker's store first?
400
00:16:19,245 --> 00:16:21,857
- We've got enough
food for everybody.
401
00:16:21,881 --> 00:16:23,659
- No, we've gotta pick up Sam.
402
00:16:23,683 --> 00:16:25,161
- Sam?
403
00:16:25,185 --> 00:16:28,164
- We invited Sam to supper
and we can't leave him.
404
00:16:29,456 --> 00:16:30,566
- Oh, for the love of!
405
00:16:30,590 --> 00:16:32,023
Alright, alright.
406
00:16:34,361 --> 00:16:36,305
- Wait a second.
407
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:37,373
- What now?
408
00:16:37,397 --> 00:16:38,941
- We have to wait for grandpa.
409
00:16:40,100 --> 00:16:41,100
- Grandpa?
410
00:16:44,137 --> 00:16:45,337
- Where do you want me to sit?
411
00:16:58,651 --> 00:17:00,396
- Honk the horn for Sam.
412
00:17:00,420 --> 00:17:02,264
- Mr. Wheeler, I
know when to honk...
413
00:17:03,289 --> 00:17:04,766
Don't do that!
414
00:17:04,790 --> 00:17:08,070
- Don't holler at
the nice, old man.
415
00:17:08,094 --> 00:17:09,005
- Hi, folks.
416
00:17:09,029 --> 00:17:10,672
- Hello there, Mr. Drucker.
417
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:12,475
- Mr. Douglas it
sure was nice of you
418
00:17:12,499 --> 00:17:14,310
to invite me to the picnic.
419
00:17:14,334 --> 00:17:16,045
- You're welcome.
420
00:17:16,069 --> 00:17:17,013
Are you ready?
421
00:17:17,037 --> 00:17:18,780
- Just waiting for Clara.
422
00:17:18,804 --> 00:17:20,116
- Who's Clara?
423
00:17:20,140 --> 00:17:21,650
- The widow Burton.
424
00:17:21,674 --> 00:17:23,319
I was gonna take her to the
Wheeler's for supper with me
425
00:17:23,343 --> 00:17:25,754
until you invited
everybody on your picnic.
426
00:17:26,979 --> 00:17:29,313
- I didn't invite everybody.
427
00:17:31,151 --> 00:17:32,161
- This here's Clara.
428
00:17:32,185 --> 00:17:33,396
- Hello, everybody.
429
00:17:33,420 --> 00:17:34,863
Hello, Clara.
430
00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:36,399
- Is that a tuba?
431
00:17:36,423 --> 00:17:37,900
- No, that's a sousaphone.
432
00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:41,870
- Wait until you hear
Clara and Linda play a duet.
433
00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:45,974
- Where do you want us to sit?
434
00:17:45,998 --> 00:17:48,344
- We don't have
room for everybody.
435
00:17:48,368 --> 00:17:49,311
- You're right.
436
00:17:49,335 --> 00:17:51,047
You better make two trips.
437
00:17:51,071 --> 00:17:53,416
- I'm not gonna...
- Could you get going?
438
00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:55,984
This kid's got the boniest
knees I ever sat on.
439
00:17:57,277 --> 00:17:58,687
- Why don't you let
Linda sit on my lap?
440
00:17:58,711 --> 00:18:00,222
- Yeah, Pa, why don't ya?
441
00:18:00,246 --> 00:18:01,457
- Stay where you are.
442
00:18:01,481 --> 00:18:04,960
All you kids think about
is television and sex.
443
00:18:06,919 --> 00:18:09,365
- Look, Mr. Drucker,
I don't know...
444
00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:15,871
- Hi, Mr. Douglas.
445
00:18:15,895 --> 00:18:16,905
I'm glad I caught you.
446
00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:18,140
You know, you were wrong?
447
00:18:18,164 --> 00:18:19,775
I didn't have a date
with Sophia Loren.
448
00:18:21,367 --> 00:18:22,611
- I know you didn't.
449
00:18:22,635 --> 00:18:24,113
- Well, I guess now
I go on your picnic.
450
00:18:24,137 --> 00:18:26,148
Where do you want me to sit?
451
00:18:26,172 --> 00:18:28,250
- There's no room for you.
452
00:18:28,274 --> 00:18:29,785
We don't even have
room for Mr. Drucker
453
00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:31,554
or Mrs. Sousaphone.
454
00:18:32,778 --> 00:18:34,957
- Mr. Kimble, why don't
you take Mr. Drucker
455
00:18:34,981 --> 00:18:37,560
and Mrs. Burton in your car?
456
00:18:37,584 --> 00:18:39,495
- Take 'em where?
457
00:18:39,519 --> 00:18:40,629
- To the picnic.
458
00:18:40,653 --> 00:18:41,930
- Gee, I'd like to, Sam,
459
00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:45,033
but Mr. Douglas invited
me to go on his picnic.
460
00:18:45,057 --> 00:18:46,835
- It's the same one.
461
00:18:46,859 --> 00:18:47,859
- Oh.
462
00:18:48,861 --> 00:18:51,107
In that case, let's
all go in my car.
463
00:18:56,002 --> 00:18:56,945
Where are we going?
464
00:18:56,969 --> 00:18:58,680
- The foot of Lover's Leap.
465
00:18:58,704 --> 00:19:00,649
- Just follow us.
466
00:19:00,673 --> 00:19:02,118
- There's no reason
waiting for you,
467
00:19:02,142 --> 00:19:04,186
it's gonna take you
awhile to change that flat.
468
00:19:04,210 --> 00:19:05,287
- Flat?
469
00:19:16,556 --> 00:19:18,501
Alright, everybody out.
470
00:19:24,564 --> 00:19:26,730
This is it, everybody out.
471
00:19:37,443 --> 00:19:38,720
- Wait a minute.
472
00:19:38,744 --> 00:19:40,077
Where's grandpa?
473
00:19:42,248 --> 00:19:44,627
- Holy smoke, I
know where he is.
474
00:19:44,651 --> 00:19:46,428
Remember when
we stopped for gas?
475
00:19:46,452 --> 00:19:48,264
He went to the men's room.
476
00:19:48,288 --> 00:19:49,598
- Are you sure?
477
00:19:49,622 --> 00:19:51,066
- Yeah, he borrowed
a nickel from me
478
00:19:51,090 --> 00:19:52,635
for the perfume
machine in there.
479
00:19:53,859 --> 00:19:55,571
- Oh for the love of!
480
00:19:55,595 --> 00:19:57,506
- You'll just have to
go back and get him.
481
00:19:57,530 --> 00:19:58,840
- Hey, me and
Linda'll go back for him.
482
00:19:58,864 --> 00:20:00,742
- Oh no you won't.
483
00:20:00,766 --> 00:20:02,844
Douglas'll get him.
484
00:20:02,868 --> 00:20:04,413
First, let's unload the food.
485
00:20:04,437 --> 00:20:05,947
I'm hungry.
486
00:20:05,971 --> 00:20:09,918
There's no sense
waiting until he gets back.
487
00:20:09,942 --> 00:20:11,587
- I'm hungry too.
488
00:20:11,611 --> 00:20:13,556
- Well I'll save you
a sandwich, Oliver.
489
00:20:13,580 --> 00:20:14,990
What do you want?
490
00:20:15,014 --> 00:20:18,994
Peanut butter and liverwurst,
or tuna fish and jelly?
491
00:20:19,018 --> 00:20:20,596
- Tuna fish and jelly?
492
00:20:20,620 --> 00:20:23,165
What kind of mess is that?
493
00:20:23,189 --> 00:20:26,235
- It's the same kind of a
mess my wife always makes.
494
00:20:26,259 --> 00:20:28,770
If you don't want it,
you don't have to eat it.
495
00:20:28,794 --> 00:20:31,039
- See here, Douglas, I didn't
want to come to this picnic
496
00:20:31,063 --> 00:20:32,274
to begin with.
497
00:20:32,298 --> 00:20:34,009
If you didn't have
a sex crazy kid.
498
00:20:35,635 --> 00:20:37,213
- Come on, boys, don't fight.
499
00:20:37,237 --> 00:20:39,281
I want this to be a nice picnic.
500
00:20:39,305 --> 00:20:40,549
- And it would have been
501
00:20:40,573 --> 00:20:43,586
if there had just
been the two of us.
502
00:20:43,610 --> 00:20:45,621
- Okay, Mr. Douglas, you
can go pick up grandpa.
503
00:20:53,953 --> 00:20:54,996
- Here we are.
504
00:20:55,020 --> 00:20:56,298
- Where have you been?
505
00:20:56,322 --> 00:20:57,933
- We had to stop
at the gas station.
506
00:20:57,957 --> 00:21:00,869
- And look who we found
perfuming himself in the men's room.
507
00:21:00,893 --> 00:21:03,694
Oh, good, we got grandpa.
508
00:21:06,266 --> 00:21:07,843
- Who is?
509
00:21:07,867 --> 00:21:09,411
- He picked her up
at the gas station.
510
00:21:11,604 --> 00:21:12,848
- He picked her up?
511
00:21:12,872 --> 00:21:15,251
- Why don't we all
sit down and eat?
512
00:21:15,275 --> 00:21:16,752
Come on, let's
everybody sit down.
513
00:21:16,776 --> 00:21:17,776
Let's go.
514
00:21:20,246 --> 00:21:21,056
Oliver.
515
00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:22,580
Oliver, come back.
516
00:21:23,516 --> 00:21:25,427
Oliver, what's the matter?
517
00:21:25,451 --> 00:21:27,896
- I wanted to be alone with you.
518
00:21:27,920 --> 00:21:31,567
- Well, maybe later on we
can sneak away for a ride.
519
00:21:31,591 --> 00:21:32,868
- Yeah, maybe
we can take a drive
520
00:21:32,892 --> 00:21:35,003
up to the top of Lover's Leap.
521
00:21:35,027 --> 00:21:37,573
- And what do we do
when we get there?
522
00:21:37,597 --> 00:21:39,241
- We can throw
rocks down on them.
523
00:21:41,367 --> 00:21:43,044
- Don't be such an old grouch.
524
00:21:43,068 --> 00:21:44,613
Come on, let's eat.
525
00:21:44,637 --> 00:21:45,981
- I'm hungry.
526
00:21:46,005 --> 00:21:47,883
- So then he crossed
the river without the dog!
527
00:21:53,012 --> 00:21:55,557
- Where are the sandwiches?
528
00:21:55,581 --> 00:21:57,259
- We ate 'em.
529
00:21:57,283 --> 00:21:59,094
- Isn't there anything left?
530
00:21:59,118 --> 00:22:01,363
- Just this sponge
rubber cherry pie.
531
00:22:07,327 --> 00:22:09,638
- The whole thing
was a disaster.
532
00:22:09,662 --> 00:22:11,873
An absolute disaster.
533
00:22:11,897 --> 00:22:14,075
- Well I thought
the music was good.
534
00:22:14,099 --> 00:22:15,099
- Music?
535
00:22:16,268 --> 00:22:20,416
A tuba and an accordion
playing Ach du lieber Augustin?
536
00:22:20,440 --> 00:22:22,117
I don't call that music.
537
00:22:22,141 --> 00:22:23,919
- Everybody had a good time.
538
00:22:23,943 --> 00:22:25,387
- I didn't.
539
00:22:25,411 --> 00:22:27,356
I wanted to be alone with you.
540
00:22:27,380 --> 00:22:29,325
- What do you call this?
541
00:22:29,349 --> 00:22:30,659
- Well.
542
00:22:30,683 --> 00:22:32,728
- Would you like to
have some caviar?
543
00:22:32,752 --> 00:22:33,895
- No thanks.
544
00:22:33,919 --> 00:22:36,432
- How 'bout some more champagne?
545
00:22:36,456 --> 00:22:37,866
- No thank you.
546
00:22:37,890 --> 00:22:40,268
- I could make you a liverwurst
and grape jelly sandwich.
547
00:22:41,661 --> 00:22:43,138
- I don't think so.
548
00:22:43,162 --> 00:22:44,873
- What would you like?
549
00:22:44,897 --> 00:22:47,008
- Why don't you come
over here and sit on my lap
550
00:22:47,032 --> 00:22:48,766
and we'll discuss it?
551
00:22:51,237 --> 00:22:55,138
This is what I had in
mind, just the two of us.
552
00:22:56,242 --> 00:22:58,787
- Mr. Douglas, I
wanted to ask you if...
553
00:22:58,811 --> 00:23:01,357
Oh boy, champagne and caviar!
554
00:23:01,381 --> 00:23:03,359
Can I have some?
555
00:23:03,383 --> 00:23:04,526
- Look, Eb...
556
00:23:04,550 --> 00:23:06,895
- Help yourself, there's plenty.
557
00:23:06,919 --> 00:23:08,564
- Is there enough for Linda?
558
00:23:08,588 --> 00:23:09,498
- What?
559
00:23:09,522 --> 00:23:10,522
- Linda!
560
00:23:11,991 --> 00:23:13,134
- Hello, everybody.
561
00:23:13,158 --> 00:23:14,936
- How 'bout some
champagne and caviar?
562
00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:16,739
- Oh, that'd be wonderful.
563
00:23:16,763 --> 00:23:18,496
- Oh for the love of.
564
00:23:21,066 --> 00:23:22,778
- So this is where you went.
565
00:23:22,802 --> 00:23:26,448
I told you two
to... Oh, thank you.
566
00:23:26,472 --> 00:23:28,817
Champagne and caviar.
567
00:23:28,841 --> 00:23:30,252
- Have some, Mr. Wheeler.
568
00:23:30,276 --> 00:23:31,487
- Thank you very much.
569
00:23:31,511 --> 00:23:32,511
Mildred!
570
00:23:35,381 --> 00:23:38,059
Mr. Douglas is having a
champagne and caviar spread.
571
00:23:39,051 --> 00:23:40,295
- No, I am not having...
572
00:23:40,319 --> 00:23:42,130
- I think it's so
nice of you folks.
573
00:23:42,154 --> 00:23:43,298
Grandpa!
574
00:23:46,559 --> 00:23:48,904
- I think we oughta
drink a toast to grandpa,
575
00:23:48,928 --> 00:23:50,939
he and what's her
name just got engaged.
576
00:23:54,300 --> 00:23:57,078
- He just picked her up
at the gas station today.
577
00:23:57,102 --> 00:23:59,481
- Congratulations, you two.
578
00:23:59,505 --> 00:24:00,482
- What happened?
579
00:24:00,506 --> 00:24:02,518
- Grandpa just got engaged.
580
00:24:02,542 --> 00:24:04,453
- How 'bout that?
581
00:24:04,477 --> 00:24:06,143
- Where did you...
- Sam!
582
00:24:07,447 --> 00:24:09,157
- What's the matter?
583
00:24:09,181 --> 00:24:10,358
- Grandpa just got engaged
584
00:24:10,382 --> 00:24:11,660
and Mr. and Mrs.
Douglas are throwing
585
00:24:11,684 --> 00:24:12,961
a champagne party for 'em.
586
00:24:12,985 --> 00:24:14,396
- Oh, isn't that nice?
587
00:24:15,521 --> 00:24:16,398
- Come on, Lisa.
588
00:24:16,422 --> 00:24:18,767
- But...
- Come on.
589
00:24:18,791 --> 00:24:21,336
- Help yourself, there are
plenty of glasses in the kitchen.
590
00:24:21,360 --> 00:24:22,360
- Lisa.
591
00:24:24,764 --> 00:24:25,874
- Where are we going?
592
00:24:25,898 --> 00:24:26,898
- To the car.
593
00:24:32,905 --> 00:24:34,149
- What about them?
594
00:24:34,173 --> 00:24:37,074
- With luck, they'll
never find us.
595
00:25:19,151 --> 00:25:23,320
This has been a Filmways
presentation, darling.
38368
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