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♪ Green acres is the place to be
2
00:00:21,955 --> 00:00:25,902
♪ Farm living is the life for me
3
00:00:25,926 --> 00:00:29,873
♪ Land spreading
out so far and wide
4
00:00:29,897 --> 00:00:34,011
♪ Keep Manhattan just
give me that country side
5
00:00:34,035 --> 00:00:37,981
♪ New York is
where I'd rather stay
6
00:00:38,005 --> 00:00:41,918
♪ I get allergic smelling hay
7
00:00:41,942 --> 00:00:46,023
♪ I just adore a penthouse view
8
00:00:46,047 --> 00:00:50,215
♪ Darling I love you
but give me Park Avenue
9
00:00:51,452 --> 00:00:57,234
♪ The chores ♪
The stores ♪ Fresh air
10
00:00:57,258 --> 00:01:00,070
♪ Time Square ♪ You are my wife
11
00:01:00,094 --> 00:01:01,905
♪ Goodbye city life
12
00:01:01,929 --> 00:01:05,497
♪ Green acres we are there
13
00:01:13,374 --> 00:01:14,551
- Oliver.
14
00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:15,575
- Hmm?
15
00:01:16,544 --> 00:01:18,755
- Do you like this color?
16
00:01:18,779 --> 00:01:21,624
- Yes, it's beautiful,
good night.
17
00:01:21,648 --> 00:01:23,393
- What color was it?
18
00:01:23,417 --> 00:01:25,195
- It was red.
19
00:01:25,219 --> 00:01:27,497
- What shade of red?
20
00:01:27,521 --> 00:01:29,399
- I haven't the faintest idea.
21
00:01:29,423 --> 00:01:31,701
- It's called
Passionate Embrace.
22
00:01:31,725 --> 00:01:35,539
They use it in all
those new sexy movies.
23
00:01:35,563 --> 00:01:36,773
- Sexy?
24
00:01:36,797 --> 00:01:37,707
- You know, when
they don't have any plot
25
00:01:37,731 --> 00:01:38,908
but you don't care because
26
00:01:38,932 --> 00:01:41,778
they hardly wear any clothes.
27
00:01:41,802 --> 00:01:44,714
- Lisa, I'd like to go to sleep.
28
00:01:44,738 --> 00:01:47,084
- Oh I'm sorry
darling, goodnight.
29
00:01:47,108 --> 00:01:48,108
- Goodnight.
30
00:01:55,082 --> 00:01:56,093
What's the matter?
31
00:01:56,117 --> 00:01:58,995
- There was a name in the dark.
32
00:01:59,019 --> 00:02:00,019
- A name in?
33
00:02:01,522 --> 00:02:03,366
Lisa turn the light off.
34
00:02:03,390 --> 00:02:04,534
- Oh yes darling, goodnight.
35
00:02:04,558 --> 00:02:05,558
- Goodnight.
36
00:02:12,566 --> 00:02:13,776
Lisa, what are you?
37
00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:16,568
- That time there
were two names.
38
00:02:17,771 --> 00:02:19,048
- Lisa, I've got a
big day tomorrow.
39
00:02:19,072 --> 00:02:20,150
I've got to go to Druckers
40
00:02:20,174 --> 00:02:21,718
to pick up my seed corn.
41
00:02:21,742 --> 00:02:24,488
I've got to overhaul
the tractor motor.
42
00:02:24,512 --> 00:02:27,624
I'd appreciate it if
you'd turn out the light.
43
00:02:27,648 --> 00:02:29,981
- Oh yes darling, goodnight.
44
00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:34,063
Do you see anything?
45
00:02:34,087 --> 00:02:35,932
No!
46
00:02:35,956 --> 00:02:39,269
- That's funny, there
should be one more name.
47
00:02:40,161 --> 00:02:41,426
Oh there it is!
48
00:02:42,396 --> 00:02:44,541
Oliver did you see it?
49
00:02:44,565 --> 00:02:45,708
Oliver?
50
00:02:45,732 --> 00:02:46,732
Oliver.
51
00:02:47,434 --> 00:02:49,446
Oliver where are you?
52
00:02:49,470 --> 00:02:51,581
On the couch,
in the living room.
53
00:02:51,605 --> 00:02:52,649
Goodnight.
54
00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:54,339
- Oh goodnight dear.
55
00:03:10,391 --> 00:03:11,635
Hello there Mr. Drucker.
56
00:03:11,659 --> 00:03:12,502
- Oh good morning folks.
57
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:13,870
- What's that?
58
00:03:13,894 --> 00:03:15,272
- Well it's a new nail polish.
59
00:03:15,296 --> 00:03:16,839
It's called Passionate Embrace.
60
00:03:16,863 --> 00:03:18,308
It's selling like hot cakes.
61
00:03:18,332 --> 00:03:20,710
- Well it should, they
advertise it everywhere.
62
00:03:20,734 --> 00:03:24,347
Even in the dark after
you turn the light out.
63
00:03:24,371 --> 00:03:25,549
- I beg your pardon?
64
00:03:25,573 --> 00:03:28,652
- My wife sees
names in the dark.
65
00:03:28,676 --> 00:03:29,686
- Oh?
66
00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:30,987
What kind of names?
67
00:03:31,011 --> 00:03:32,455
- Well you see there was this...
68
00:03:32,479 --> 00:03:36,560
- Mr. Drucker, I came over
here to pick up my seed corn.
69
00:03:36,584 --> 00:03:38,728
- I've got it in the
back room for you.
70
00:03:38,752 --> 00:03:41,030
Oh, by the way Mrs.
Douglas before I forget
71
00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:42,499
remember you were asking me
72
00:03:42,523 --> 00:03:45,001
if I was gonna get in
some of that gourmet food?
73
00:03:45,025 --> 00:03:46,403
- Well yes.
74
00:03:46,427 --> 00:03:48,871
- Well I called the
warehouse in the county seat
75
00:03:48,895 --> 00:03:53,064
and they sent me a whole
selection of that gourmet stuff.
76
00:03:54,602 --> 00:03:57,547
- Mr. Drucker I believe
you misspelled gourmet.
77
00:03:57,571 --> 00:03:58,571
- Where?
78
00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:02,385
- Well it's supposed
to be G-O-U-R-M-E-T.
79
00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:03,620
- What difference does it make?
80
00:04:03,644 --> 00:04:05,888
All he has is some
stuffed olives.
81
00:04:05,912 --> 00:04:07,990
- Well that's about as
gourmet as they get.
82
00:04:08,014 --> 00:04:09,693
- Didn't they have any caviar?
83
00:04:09,717 --> 00:04:11,928
- Oh you mean them
little black fish eggs?
84
00:04:11,952 --> 00:04:13,396
No, but they told me
they were coming out
85
00:04:13,420 --> 00:04:16,433
with a do it
yourself caviar kit.
86
00:04:16,457 --> 00:04:18,167
- A caviar kit?
87
00:04:18,191 --> 00:04:20,637
- Yeah, you cook
up a box of tapioca
88
00:04:20,661 --> 00:04:22,505
and you stir in
some licorice for color
89
00:04:22,529 --> 00:04:26,409
and then add some
sardine oil for the fish taste.
90
00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:28,378
- I'll demo one of those.
91
00:04:28,402 --> 00:04:29,946
- Yes ma'am, right away.
92
00:04:29,970 --> 00:04:31,681
- Mr. Drucker, if you
would just get me my...
93
00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:35,151
- Do they have a
pate de foie gras kit?
94
00:04:35,175 --> 00:04:36,319
- Patty duh?
95
00:04:36,343 --> 00:04:37,554
- Goose liver.
96
00:04:37,578 --> 00:04:39,489
- No ma'am, but I can
order you a frozen goose
97
00:04:39,513 --> 00:04:42,592
and you deliver it yourself.
98
00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:44,961
- Do you think I
could do that Oliver?
99
00:04:44,985 --> 00:04:46,429
- I'm sure I don't know.
100
00:04:46,453 --> 00:04:48,064
Now look Mr. Drucker,
please would you get my...
101
00:04:48,088 --> 00:04:49,088
- Howdy folks.
102
00:04:51,592 --> 00:04:53,803
- Oh hello there Mr. Ziffel.
103
00:04:53,827 --> 00:04:55,171
Hello Arnold.
104
00:04:56,897 --> 00:04:58,074
- Arnold wants to
know if you've got
105
00:04:58,098 --> 00:04:59,942
your gourmet section in yet.
106
00:04:59,966 --> 00:05:01,077
- Right over there.
107
00:05:05,105 --> 00:05:08,885
- Arnold says you aint
got gourmet spelled right.
108
00:05:08,909 --> 00:05:10,119
- How would he know how?
109
00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:11,788
- Have you got your
seed corn planted yet?
110
00:05:11,812 --> 00:05:13,423
- I will if Mr. Drucker
ever gets...
111
00:05:13,447 --> 00:05:17,282
- Fred, who's gonna pay
for all them gourmets?
112
00:05:19,953 --> 00:05:22,265
- Put it on Arnold's bill.
113
00:05:22,289 --> 00:05:24,834
- You know how much he's ran up?
114
00:05:24,858 --> 00:05:26,925
192 dollars and 27 cents.
115
00:05:28,362 --> 00:05:30,840
- Well Arnold can afford
it if he's a millionaire.
116
00:05:30,864 --> 00:05:32,141
At least he's going to be
117
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:34,177
when he gets his inheritation.
118
00:05:34,201 --> 00:05:35,312
- When's he gonna get it?
119
00:05:35,336 --> 00:05:37,902
- Don't ask me, ask his lawyer.
120
00:05:39,039 --> 00:05:40,717
- I haven't the slightest idea.
121
00:05:40,741 --> 00:05:42,084
I've done everything I can do
122
00:05:42,108 --> 00:05:43,820
to expedite the
settlement of the estate.
123
00:05:43,844 --> 00:05:44,821
- Maybe you'd
better turn it over
124
00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:46,489
to Doris's brother.
125
00:05:46,513 --> 00:05:47,624
- Is he a lawyer?
126
00:05:47,648 --> 00:05:50,360
- No, he's the carobertive.
127
00:05:50,384 --> 00:05:51,661
- What does he know about law?
128
00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:54,464
- What do you know
about cutting toe nails?
129
00:05:54,488 --> 00:05:55,732
- Nothing.
130
00:05:55,756 --> 00:05:58,635
- Then if I was you, I'd
stick to practicing law.
131
00:05:58,659 --> 00:06:00,337
- For the love of.
132
00:06:00,361 --> 00:06:01,705
Look Mr. Drucker if
you would just tell me
133
00:06:01,729 --> 00:06:02,639
where the seed corn is
134
00:06:02,663 --> 00:06:04,073
I'll put it in the car myself.
135
00:06:04,097 --> 00:06:04,974
- Well I'll help you.
136
00:06:04,998 --> 00:06:05,908
- Thank you.
137
00:06:05,932 --> 00:06:07,176
- Oh by the way Mr. Douglas
138
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:09,479
do you know how to plant
this new hybrid variety
139
00:06:09,503 --> 00:06:10,714
of seed corn?
140
00:06:10,738 --> 00:06:14,083
- He don't even know
how to plant the old kind.
141
00:06:14,107 --> 00:06:15,585
- Have you got any literature?
142
00:06:15,609 --> 00:06:19,389
- Yeah, I believe the seed
salesman left some booklets.
143
00:06:19,413 --> 00:06:20,223
Here we are.
144
00:06:20,247 --> 00:06:21,958
- Thank you.
145
00:06:21,982 --> 00:06:24,394
- Have you done
your plowing yet.
146
00:06:24,418 --> 00:06:27,430
First I've got to overhaul
my tractor motor.
147
00:06:32,158 --> 00:06:33,269
Eb!
148
00:06:33,293 --> 00:06:34,404
Eb!
149
00:06:34,428 --> 00:06:35,705
- Oliver!
150
00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:36,873
- Eb!
151
00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:38,207
- Oliver!
152
00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:39,041
- What do you want?
153
00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:42,512
- I'm looking for...
What are you doing?
154
00:06:42,536 --> 00:06:44,414
- I'm trying to get the
motor back in the tractor.
155
00:06:44,438 --> 00:06:47,717
- Well, it was
a nice day for it.
156
00:06:47,741 --> 00:06:49,318
- Eb!
157
00:06:49,342 --> 00:06:51,388
- Have you seen Evelyn?
158
00:06:51,412 --> 00:06:52,455
- Who's Evelyn?
159
00:06:52,479 --> 00:06:54,957
- She's a little white chicken.
160
00:06:54,981 --> 00:06:57,126
- No, I haven't see her, Eb!
161
00:06:57,150 --> 00:06:58,127
- Evelyn!
162
00:06:58,151 --> 00:06:59,028
- Eb!
163
00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:00,052
- Evelyn!
164
00:07:01,187 --> 00:07:02,632
- Look will you stop?
165
00:07:02,656 --> 00:07:03,867
This thing is heavy.
166
00:07:03,891 --> 00:07:04,834
- Can I help you?
167
00:07:04,858 --> 00:07:06,102
- No thanks.
168
00:07:06,126 --> 00:07:07,637
- You never want me
to help you with anything
169
00:07:07,661 --> 00:07:08,993
around the farm.
170
00:07:10,163 --> 00:07:12,475
- If you really want
to help, go find Evelyn.
171
00:07:12,499 --> 00:07:13,843
- Evelyn!
172
00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:14,867
I mean Ep!
173
00:07:16,870 --> 00:07:17,747
- Who do you want?
174
00:07:17,771 --> 00:07:18,915
Me or Evelyn?
175
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:20,850
- I need some help raising this.
176
00:07:20,874 --> 00:07:21,951
- Yes sir.
177
00:07:27,648 --> 00:07:29,147
- Oh there we are.
178
00:07:31,151 --> 00:07:32,995
No, no, not so high.
179
00:07:33,019 --> 00:07:33,963
That's alright.
180
00:07:33,987 --> 00:07:35,465
- Eb, Eb have you see Evelyn
181
00:07:35,489 --> 00:07:37,166
the little white chicken?
182
00:07:37,190 --> 00:07:39,368
- No ma'am but Charlie
ought to know where she is.
183
00:07:39,392 --> 00:07:40,269
- Who's Charlie?
184
00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:41,337
- The rooster.
185
00:07:41,361 --> 00:07:42,928
- Charlie, Charlie!
186
00:07:44,498 --> 00:07:46,075
- Evelyn!
187
00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:48,010
- Will you stop
yelling in my ear?
188
00:07:48,034 --> 00:07:49,034
- Yes sir.
189
00:07:50,337 --> 00:07:51,748
- Good Lord.
190
00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:54,317
- Hey!
191
00:07:54,341 --> 00:07:55,819
There's Evelyn.
192
00:07:58,846 --> 00:07:59,789
Mrs. Douglas?
193
00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:00,957
- Yes?
194
00:08:00,981 --> 00:08:01,958
- I found Evelyn.
195
00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:04,549
- Oh good, where's Mr. Douglas?
196
00:08:05,719 --> 00:08:06,863
- I don't know, he
was around here
197
00:08:06,887 --> 00:08:08,064
a few minutes ago.
198
00:08:08,088 --> 00:08:09,253
- I'm up here.
199
00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:13,002
- Oh Oliver, if you're
looking for Evelyn
200
00:08:13,026 --> 00:08:16,038
don't bother, we found her.
201
00:08:16,062 --> 00:08:17,395
- You miserable!
202
00:08:19,432 --> 00:08:20,543
- Mr. Douglas?
203
00:08:20,567 --> 00:08:21,878
We got the motor back in.
204
00:08:21,902 --> 00:08:24,246
What do you want me to do now?
205
00:08:24,270 --> 00:08:25,181
- Get me down you...
206
00:08:25,205 --> 00:08:26,382
- With the mood you're in
207
00:08:26,406 --> 00:08:28,485
I'm better off
with you up there.
208
00:08:36,884 --> 00:08:38,060
If you're gonna read
209
00:08:38,084 --> 00:08:40,062
I might as well take
the rest of the day off.
210
00:08:40,086 --> 00:08:42,866
- Eb I just wanted to
check something in here.
211
00:08:42,890 --> 00:08:44,300
- Boy, you sure are
going at corn planting
212
00:08:44,324 --> 00:08:46,002
scientifically this year.
213
00:08:46,026 --> 00:08:47,804
- Well I don't want to
make the same mistakes
214
00:08:47,828 --> 00:08:50,106
that I made with
my corn last year.
215
00:08:50,130 --> 00:08:51,374
- I know how you can do that.
216
00:08:51,398 --> 00:08:52,942
Plant tomatoes.
217
00:08:52,966 --> 00:08:54,176
- Look.
218
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:54,978
- That will give you
some new mistakes
219
00:08:55,002 --> 00:08:56,913
to fool around with.
220
00:08:56,937 --> 00:08:57,981
- Eb would you mind?
221
00:08:58,005 --> 00:08:58,982
- Hello my dear!
222
00:08:59,006 --> 00:09:00,449
I've brought you
some sandwiches.
223
00:09:00,473 --> 00:09:01,773
- Oh boy thanks!
224
00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:04,621
Didn't you bring
any for Mr. Douglas?
225
00:09:04,645 --> 00:09:06,155
- Well they're for both of you.
226
00:09:06,179 --> 00:09:07,123
- Thank you.
227
00:09:07,147 --> 00:09:08,324
- Eat them while they're hot.
228
00:09:08,348 --> 00:09:10,092
- What kind of
sandwiches are they?
229
00:09:10,116 --> 00:09:12,595
- Liverwurst and grape jelly.
230
00:09:12,619 --> 00:09:13,763
- Liverwurst and...
231
00:09:13,787 --> 00:09:14,864
- Did you put
mayonnaise on them?
232
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:17,166
- Yes, and ketchup.
233
00:09:17,190 --> 00:09:18,568
- Thank you, look
we'll eat them later.
234
00:09:18,592 --> 00:09:21,037
- If there's anything
else you need sire.
235
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:22,338
Do you want me
to run the tractor
236
00:09:22,362 --> 00:09:24,541
while you are eating?
237
00:09:24,565 --> 00:09:26,442
- Lisa, why are
you being so helpful
238
00:09:26,466 --> 00:09:28,144
all of a sudden?
239
00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:31,280
- Well you always tell me
that an American farmer's wife
240
00:09:31,304 --> 00:09:32,916
is at her husband's side
241
00:09:32,940 --> 00:09:35,818
while he's toiling and
sweating in the fields.
242
00:09:35,842 --> 00:09:37,053
- Well that's right.
243
00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:39,188
And I appreciate the bag of...
244
00:09:39,212 --> 00:09:40,690
- Well if there's
anything else you need
245
00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:45,595
just whistle and I will be
with Beck when you call.
246
00:09:45,619 --> 00:09:47,096
- You'll be with Beck when I?
247
00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:48,120
- Bye!
248
00:09:49,990 --> 00:09:51,868
- Eb, start the tractor.
249
00:09:51,892 --> 00:09:53,502
- Can I eat my sandwich first?
250
00:09:53,526 --> 00:09:54,671
- Crank her up.
251
00:09:54,695 --> 00:09:55,504
- But.
252
00:09:55,528 --> 00:09:56,338
- Crank!
253
00:09:56,362 --> 00:09:58,029
- You certainly are.
254
00:09:59,833 --> 00:10:00,833
- Switch on.
255
00:10:03,804 --> 00:10:05,536
- Pull out the choke.
256
00:10:12,545 --> 00:10:15,558
4th of July came
early this year.
257
00:10:15,582 --> 00:10:16,915
- Grab the plow.
258
00:10:19,586 --> 00:10:23,066
And be sure to keep
the furrows straight.
259
00:10:23,090 --> 00:10:24,801
- Mr. Douglas!
260
00:10:24,825 --> 00:10:26,035
Oh Mr. Douglas!
261
00:10:43,176 --> 00:10:44,676
Hi, how you doing?
262
00:10:45,712 --> 00:10:48,357
- Hey, what are you doing here?
263
00:10:48,381 --> 00:10:50,559
- Eating my sandwich.
264
00:10:50,583 --> 00:10:53,162
- What happened to the plow?
265
00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:56,165
- You forgot to
hitch it to the tractor.
266
00:10:56,189 --> 00:10:58,434
- Why didn't you say something?
267
00:10:58,458 --> 00:11:02,038
- You told me never to
talk when my mouth was full.
268
00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:03,062
- Oh.
269
00:11:03,864 --> 00:11:05,207
Hitch it up.
270
00:11:05,231 --> 00:11:08,544
- I'm entitled to a
siesta after eating.
271
00:11:08,568 --> 00:11:10,146
- Will you hitch it up!
272
00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:11,347
- Yes sir.
273
00:11:11,371 --> 00:11:12,815
Boy the way you keep
me working around here.
274
00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:15,018
I don't even have time
to make a picket sign.
275
00:11:15,042 --> 00:11:16,152
- Eb!
276
00:11:19,612 --> 00:11:20,790
- We just finished plowing.
277
00:11:20,814 --> 00:11:21,724
Why don't we take a rest
278
00:11:21,748 --> 00:11:23,092
and plant the seed tomorrow?
279
00:11:23,116 --> 00:11:25,361
- Because the faster
we plant the seed
280
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:26,696
the faster it will grow.
281
00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:28,330
- Tell me where it
says that in the book.
282
00:11:28,354 --> 00:11:31,801
- It doesn't have
to say it in the book.
283
00:11:31,825 --> 00:11:35,304
- Mr. Douglas, thank
goodness I'm not too late.
284
00:11:35,328 --> 00:11:36,539
- For what?
285
00:11:36,563 --> 00:11:38,541
- You haven't planted
your seeds yet have you?
286
00:11:38,565 --> 00:11:39,475
- No.
287
00:11:39,499 --> 00:11:42,078
- Then this is your lucky day.
288
00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:43,980
- That remains to be seen.
289
00:11:44,004 --> 00:11:45,848
- Mr. Douglas,
what would you say
290
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:48,551
if I told you that on
the back of my truck
291
00:11:48,575 --> 00:11:52,221
I had one of the most
astounding devices
292
00:11:52,245 --> 00:11:55,058
for planting seeds known to man?
293
00:11:55,082 --> 00:11:57,026
- Mr. Haney, if you're
gonna try to sell me
294
00:11:57,050 --> 00:11:59,095
some cockamamie machine.
295
00:11:59,119 --> 00:12:00,462
- Machine?
296
00:12:00,486 --> 00:12:03,132
Who said anything about machine.
297
00:12:07,293 --> 00:12:10,272
May I present Mrs. Agnes Cudahy.
298
00:12:10,296 --> 00:12:14,343
The last of the
authentic seed spitters.
299
00:12:14,367 --> 00:12:16,245
- Seed spitters?
300
00:12:16,269 --> 00:12:18,380
- The only accurate
way to plant seeds
301
00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:21,250
in two furrows at one time.
302
00:12:21,274 --> 00:12:22,752
- Mr. Haney.
303
00:12:22,776 --> 00:12:24,353
- I'm willing to
back up my claim
304
00:12:24,377 --> 00:12:25,888
with a demonstration.
305
00:12:25,912 --> 00:12:27,156
Can I have some corn?
306
00:12:27,180 --> 00:12:28,091
- No, you may not.
307
00:12:28,115 --> 00:12:29,258
- Yeah, here you are right here.
308
00:12:29,282 --> 00:12:30,626
- Oh come on!
309
00:12:30,650 --> 00:12:34,085
- I thank you and Mrs.
Cudahy thanks you.
310
00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:39,257
How let us pretend that
these are your furrows.
311
00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:42,094
- Golly!
312
00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:45,074
- Now the first
step is to drill holes
313
00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:47,009
for the seeds in the furrows.
314
00:12:47,033 --> 00:12:49,846
Now these holes
can be drilled by hand
315
00:12:49,870 --> 00:12:52,749
by machinery, or by
Donny Woodpecker
316
00:12:52,773 --> 00:12:55,351
who will be glad to
peck the holes for you
317
00:12:55,375 --> 00:12:56,975
at 10 cents a peck.
318
00:12:58,178 --> 00:13:00,522
- Of all the ridiculous...
- Pray watch.
319
00:13:09,756 --> 00:13:12,423
Now, planting two seeds at once.
320
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:19,142
Notice her fantastic accuracy?
321
00:13:19,166 --> 00:13:22,178
Seed spitting is
indeed a lost art.
322
00:13:22,202 --> 00:13:25,581
- Well yes, but I don't really.
323
00:13:25,605 --> 00:13:26,849
What was that?
324
00:13:26,873 --> 00:13:30,608
- I believe Mrs. Cudahy
just planted her tooth.
325
00:13:31,812 --> 00:13:33,355
- Oh for the love of.
326
00:13:33,379 --> 00:13:35,191
- Now if you would
just sign this contract
327
00:13:35,215 --> 00:13:38,360
for Mrs. Cudahy's
seed spitting services.
328
00:13:38,384 --> 00:13:39,862
- I don't want her services.
329
00:13:39,886 --> 00:13:43,732
I can spit my own, I mean
I can plant my own seed.
330
00:13:43,756 --> 00:13:45,534
- And what provisions
have you made
331
00:13:45,558 --> 00:13:49,505
for protecting your seed
once you've planted it?
332
00:13:49,529 --> 00:13:50,706
- Well I haven't made any.
333
00:13:50,730 --> 00:13:52,641
- You haven't made any?
334
00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:54,510
Aren't you worried about crows?
335
00:13:54,534 --> 00:13:56,012
- No.
336
00:13:56,036 --> 00:14:00,116
- Well, perhaps Oscar can
change your mind about that.
337
00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:01,140
Here boy!
338
00:14:02,142 --> 00:14:04,987
Oscar, tell Mr. Douglas
what a flock of crows
339
00:14:05,011 --> 00:14:08,257
can do to a newly
seeded field of corn.
340
00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:13,329
Aint that frightening?
341
00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:14,897
- It sure is.
342
00:14:14,921 --> 00:14:15,932
- What did he say?
343
00:14:15,956 --> 00:14:17,099
- You heard him.
344
00:14:17,123 --> 00:14:19,001
- Fortunately, Oscar has agreed
345
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:20,769
to come over to our side
346
00:14:20,793 --> 00:14:23,439
and think for the farmers.
347
00:14:23,463 --> 00:14:24,540
- Think for the...
348
00:14:24,564 --> 00:14:26,508
- Now here's the
way Oscar works.
349
00:14:26,532 --> 00:14:29,345
He hangs around
old fences and stuff
350
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:32,514
and mingles with the bad crows
351
00:14:32,538 --> 00:14:35,451
making them believe
that he's one of them.
352
00:14:35,475 --> 00:14:37,453
And then when
he hears their plan
353
00:14:37,477 --> 00:14:39,555
to raid somebody's corn field
354
00:14:39,579 --> 00:14:41,012
he reports to me.
355
00:14:42,883 --> 00:14:46,217
Either in person or
by short wave radio.
356
00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:49,198
- If that isn't the most...
357
00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:52,268
- I in turn relay
the news to you
358
00:14:52,292 --> 00:14:54,837
and you can take whatever
steps you think is necessary
359
00:14:54,861 --> 00:14:56,906
to protect your crops.
360
00:14:56,930 --> 00:14:59,808
- I'm about to take the
first step to protect it.
361
00:14:59,832 --> 00:15:00,943
Out!
362
00:15:00,967 --> 00:15:01,978
- Oh but Mr. Douglas.
363
00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:03,445
- Out!
364
00:15:03,469 --> 00:15:07,250
And take your freak crow and
your Lucy Loose Tooth with you.
365
00:15:07,274 --> 00:15:08,484
- Inhospitable.
366
00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:25,667
- Eb I told you before.
367
00:15:25,691 --> 00:15:28,804
You're supposed to
cover the seeds with a hoe.
368
00:15:28,828 --> 00:15:30,328
- Sorry, I forgot.
369
00:15:32,032 --> 00:15:33,032
- Hoe!
370
00:15:34,700 --> 00:15:35,700
Hoe!
371
00:15:36,669 --> 00:15:38,881
- I didn't mean...
- Yoohoo!
372
00:15:38,905 --> 00:15:40,449
Hello dear.
373
00:15:40,473 --> 00:15:42,919
Here I am, the wife
of the American farmer
374
00:15:42,943 --> 00:15:44,186
with the lemonade
375
00:15:44,210 --> 00:15:46,722
for her toiling and
sweating husband
376
00:15:46,746 --> 00:15:48,490
who is working in the field.
377
00:15:48,514 --> 00:15:50,726
- Oh boy, I'm thirsty.
378
00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:52,150
- Well have some.
379
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:55,464
- Oh!
380
00:15:56,856 --> 00:15:58,856
- Did you say something?
381
00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:01,804
- Boy, that sure was good.
382
00:16:01,828 --> 00:16:03,806
I've never tasted
lemonade like that before.
383
00:16:03,830 --> 00:16:06,309
- Well have some more.
384
00:16:06,333 --> 00:16:09,578
- Oh, I see you are
ready for some more.
385
00:16:09,602 --> 00:16:11,113
I'm glad you like it.
386
00:16:12,372 --> 00:16:14,716
What's the matter
with your voice?
387
00:16:14,740 --> 00:16:15,851
- Can I have some more?
388
00:16:15,875 --> 00:16:17,619
- Oh you like it Eb?
389
00:16:17,643 --> 00:16:19,355
- Yes ma'am.
390
00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:22,758
- Well I can see my
lemonade is a big hit.
391
00:16:22,782 --> 00:16:24,827
- Yeah, it's a big hit.
392
00:16:24,851 --> 00:16:27,696
- Then what did you
throw it away for?
393
00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:28,931
- Oh!
394
00:16:28,955 --> 00:16:29,932
- You threw it away
after all the trouble
395
00:16:29,956 --> 00:16:32,268
I went through to make it?
396
00:16:32,292 --> 00:16:33,502
- Lisa, I wasn't thirsty.
397
00:16:33,526 --> 00:16:34,903
- Well this is the
last time this wife
398
00:16:34,927 --> 00:16:36,105
of the American farmer
399
00:16:36,129 --> 00:16:37,906
is going to help the toilers
400
00:16:37,930 --> 00:16:39,108
and the sweaters.
401
00:16:39,132 --> 00:16:40,343
- Lisa!
402
00:16:40,367 --> 00:16:42,644
- Don't beg me,
no more lemonade.
403
00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:43,668
That's it.
404
00:16:48,574 --> 00:16:50,552
- Well you must feel
proud of yourself.
405
00:16:50,576 --> 00:16:53,155
Dumping out an American
farmer's lemonade.
406
00:16:53,179 --> 00:16:54,723
- Eb, why did
you have to tell...
407
00:16:54,747 --> 00:16:56,592
- Just because it
had a kerosene taste
408
00:16:56,616 --> 00:16:58,961
didn't mean you
had to pour it out.
409
00:16:58,985 --> 00:17:01,597
- Oh, let's get back to work.
410
00:17:01,621 --> 00:17:02,631
- Yes sir.
411
00:17:07,927 --> 00:17:09,705
- Lisa, I'm sorry
about the lemonade.
412
00:17:09,729 --> 00:17:11,474
I know you were
trying to be helpful.
413
00:17:11,498 --> 00:17:13,142
- I don't want to talk about it.
414
00:17:13,166 --> 00:17:14,743
- Fine.
415
00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:16,567
- Why did you dump it?
416
00:17:17,437 --> 00:17:18,647
- Lisa, you just said...
417
00:17:18,671 --> 00:17:21,417
- How can be a good
American farmer's wife
418
00:17:21,441 --> 00:17:23,174
when you're a dumper?
419
00:17:24,310 --> 00:17:26,355
- Lisa, if you don't
mind I'm tired.
420
00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:28,057
- You work too hard.
421
00:17:28,081 --> 00:17:30,026
- That's part of being a farmer.
422
00:17:30,050 --> 00:17:31,927
Since the days
of the revolution.
423
00:17:31,951 --> 00:17:36,232
The American farmer has
worked from sun up to sun down.
424
00:17:36,256 --> 00:17:38,734
Planting his seeds
in the rich, brown soil
425
00:17:38,758 --> 00:17:41,303
knowing that soon the cool rain
426
00:17:41,327 --> 00:17:43,705
and the warm sun
will give them life
427
00:17:43,729 --> 00:17:45,508
and make them burst
up through the soil
428
00:17:45,532 --> 00:17:48,577
up towards the sun and the sky.
429
00:17:48,601 --> 00:17:49,867
Yes, I'm tired.
430
00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:53,882
But it's a proud tiredness.
431
00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:55,739
An American tiredness.
432
00:17:57,677 --> 00:17:58,921
- Goodnight Oliver.
433
00:17:58,945 --> 00:18:00,344
- Goodnight dear.
434
00:18:06,086 --> 00:18:07,496
- Oliver.
435
00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:08,730
- Hmm?
436
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:09,665
- Would you
please tell the fellow
437
00:18:09,689 --> 00:18:11,067
to stop playing the fife?
438
00:18:11,091 --> 00:18:12,923
I want to go to sleep.
439
00:18:14,060 --> 00:18:16,060
- Stop playing the fife?
440
00:18:17,163 --> 00:18:19,575
- Thank you, goodnight.
441
00:18:26,539 --> 00:18:28,084
- Will you let go of my arm?
442
00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:30,052
- I want to show you what's
growing in your corn field!
443
00:18:30,076 --> 00:18:31,320
- How could anything be growing?
444
00:18:31,344 --> 00:18:32,721
We just planted it yesterday.
445
00:18:32,745 --> 00:18:33,956
- You'll see, come on.
446
00:18:33,980 --> 00:18:35,391
- Oh now look at that,
there's nothing growing.
447
00:18:35,415 --> 00:18:37,426
- Huh, what do you call that?
448
00:18:48,694 --> 00:18:50,306
- That's impossible.
449
00:18:50,330 --> 00:18:53,431
- That's what I
said but there it is.
450
00:18:56,068 --> 00:18:58,214
When you plant your little
seeds in the rich, brown earth
451
00:18:58,238 --> 00:19:00,816
and they burst through
they really burst.
452
00:19:00,840 --> 00:19:02,985
In fact, they burst,
bust, and boom.
453
00:19:03,009 --> 00:19:04,286
- I don't understand how...
454
00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:06,522
- It's just like Jack
and the Beanstalk.
455
00:19:06,546 --> 00:19:08,157
Only you did it with corn.
456
00:19:08,181 --> 00:19:10,092
- Jack and the...
- Hi Eb!
457
00:19:10,116 --> 00:19:11,760
- Hi Jack!
458
00:19:11,784 --> 00:19:12,894
- Jack?
459
00:19:12,918 --> 00:19:14,363
Where did he come from?
460
00:19:14,387 --> 00:19:15,831
- Did you see anybody up there?
461
00:19:15,855 --> 00:19:18,422
- Just a giant in a green suit.
462
00:19:19,292 --> 00:19:21,770
- A giant in a green suit.
463
00:19:21,794 --> 00:19:23,561
Ho, ho, ho.
464
00:19:25,465 --> 00:19:27,476
- Well who could?
465
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:29,044
- A can of corn!
466
00:19:29,068 --> 00:19:31,447
Golly, we're in a TV commercial.
467
00:19:31,471 --> 00:19:32,481
- This isn't.
468
00:19:32,505 --> 00:19:35,083
There must be some explanation.
469
00:19:35,107 --> 00:19:36,285
- Okay, let's hear it.
470
00:19:36,309 --> 00:19:37,419
- Well I don't know what the.
471
00:19:37,443 --> 00:19:40,189
- I'm gonna take
a look up there.
472
00:19:40,213 --> 00:19:43,159
- Will you get off of there!
473
00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:43,992
- Good morning.
474
00:19:44,016 --> 00:19:45,227
- Oh, hi Mr. Kimball.
475
00:19:45,251 --> 00:19:46,162
- That's right, Hank
Kimball's the name
476
00:19:46,186 --> 00:19:47,863
and county agenting is my game.
477
00:19:49,155 --> 00:19:50,932
- Mr. Kimball am
I glad to see you.
478
00:19:50,956 --> 00:19:52,801
- See me what?
479
00:19:52,825 --> 00:19:54,970
- Well, look at that.
480
00:19:54,994 --> 00:19:56,038
- What about it?
481
00:19:56,062 --> 00:19:58,006
- Do you realize what that is?
482
00:19:58,030 --> 00:20:00,809
- Yeah, looks like a
high rise corn stalk.
483
00:20:00,833 --> 00:20:03,078
- Well have you ever
seen anything like it?
484
00:20:03,102 --> 00:20:05,847
- Oh yeah, there's a
lot of them going around.
485
00:20:05,871 --> 00:20:08,617
Ben Miller had a
20 story corn stalk.
486
00:20:08,641 --> 00:20:11,287
No, it was a 14
story tomato plant.
487
00:20:11,311 --> 00:20:13,322
Well it wasn't 14 stories.
488
00:20:13,346 --> 00:20:14,679
It was in a pot.
489
00:20:15,848 --> 00:20:18,060
- How could a thing
like this happen?
490
00:20:18,084 --> 00:20:22,064
- Well, there's a simple
scientific explanation to that.
491
00:20:22,088 --> 00:20:23,232
- Yeah?
492
00:20:23,256 --> 00:20:26,268
- You see what
happened here was...
493
00:20:26,292 --> 00:20:29,405
No, that's for giant artichokes.
494
00:20:29,429 --> 00:20:31,507
- This just can't be.
495
00:20:31,531 --> 00:20:32,741
- Why not?
496
00:20:32,765 --> 00:20:34,343
It happened in Jack
and the Beanstalk.
497
00:20:34,367 --> 00:20:36,412
See, there was this...
- Hi Mr. Kimball!
498
00:20:36,436 --> 00:20:38,314
- Oh hi Jack.
499
00:20:38,338 --> 00:20:41,339
- Will you get off
of my corn stalk?
500
00:20:42,775 --> 00:20:46,510
- Mr. Douglass, have you
heard anybody go, "Ho, ho, ho"?
501
00:20:47,714 --> 00:20:49,225
- Yes, yes.
502
00:20:49,249 --> 00:20:50,992
- Well there's your answer.
503
00:20:51,016 --> 00:20:52,595
You're in a TV commercial.
504
00:20:55,054 --> 00:20:56,265
Well, if you need any more help
505
00:20:56,289 --> 00:20:57,700
just give me a call.
506
00:20:57,724 --> 00:21:00,001
- Mr. Kimball please.
507
00:21:00,025 --> 00:21:01,459
- Watch out below!
508
00:21:04,530 --> 00:21:07,909
Hey, how about that
ear of corn Mr. Douglas?
509
00:21:07,933 --> 00:21:09,978
- This is tremendous,
I never saw anything...
510
00:21:10,002 --> 00:21:11,680
- The giant helped me pick it.
511
00:21:11,704 --> 00:21:13,048
Thank you giant!
512
00:21:13,072 --> 00:21:14,838
Ho, ho, ho.
513
00:21:17,243 --> 00:21:18,787
- What's so funny?
514
00:21:18,811 --> 00:21:21,857
- Why Eb is talking
to the, hey look at that!
515
00:21:21,881 --> 00:21:25,861
- Well, you finally
learned how to grow corn.
516
00:21:25,885 --> 00:21:27,162
- No, I didn't grow it.
517
00:21:27,186 --> 00:21:29,431
I don't know how
it happened, look!
518
00:21:29,455 --> 00:21:31,600
- Well it was
probably a magic seed
519
00:21:31,624 --> 00:21:34,270
like in Jacqueline
and the Beanstalk.
520
00:21:34,294 --> 00:21:36,405
- Oh no, it was Jack
and the Beanstalk.
521
00:21:36,429 --> 00:21:37,806
- Hello Mrs. Douglas.
522
00:21:37,830 --> 00:21:39,930
- Hello there Jacqueline.
523
00:21:42,034 --> 00:21:43,245
- I must be going out of my...
524
00:21:43,269 --> 00:21:45,247
- There's a nice
giant living up there.
525
00:21:45,271 --> 00:21:47,683
Would you like a
can of creamed corn?
526
00:21:47,707 --> 00:21:49,518
- I'd love it.
527
00:21:49,542 --> 00:21:50,952
- Hey giant!
528
00:21:50,976 --> 00:21:52,376
One creamed corn!
529
00:21:56,416 --> 00:22:00,095
You're supposed to
put it in the can dummy!
530
00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:02,720
- This whole thing is utterly...
531
00:22:05,425 --> 00:22:06,868
- Very funny!
532
00:22:06,892 --> 00:22:08,626
Ho, ho, ho.
533
00:22:10,830 --> 00:22:13,642
- I can't, there must
be some explanation.
534
00:22:13,666 --> 00:22:15,143
Maybe it was the seed
535
00:22:15,167 --> 00:22:17,780
or maybe it was
something in the soil.
536
00:22:17,804 --> 00:22:20,215
- The soil, that's what it was.
537
00:22:20,239 --> 00:22:22,050
The soil! The soil!
538
00:22:22,074 --> 00:22:23,319
- What do you mean?
539
00:22:23,343 --> 00:22:25,287
- That's where you threw
Mrs. Douglas's lemonade.
540
00:22:25,311 --> 00:22:27,255
- The lemonade?
541
00:22:27,279 --> 00:22:29,057
Could that have?
542
00:22:29,081 --> 00:22:30,225
Lisa what was in it?
543
00:22:30,249 --> 00:22:31,059
- What do you care?
544
00:22:31,083 --> 00:22:32,260
You don't like it.
545
00:22:32,284 --> 00:22:33,562
- Lisa it's possible
there's something in it
546
00:22:33,586 --> 00:22:35,397
that made the corn grow.
547
00:22:35,421 --> 00:22:36,665
You've got to tell me.
548
00:22:36,689 --> 00:22:37,499
Tell me!
549
00:22:37,523 --> 00:22:38,500
Tell me!
550
00:22:38,524 --> 00:22:39,335
Tell me!
551
00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:40,168
- Oliver!
552
00:22:40,192 --> 00:22:41,002
Oliver!
553
00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:42,270
What's the matter!
554
00:22:42,294 --> 00:22:44,373
- What did you put
in that lemonade?
555
00:22:44,397 --> 00:22:46,107
- What's the matter?
556
00:22:46,131 --> 00:22:48,799
- Oh boy did I have a nightmare.
557
00:22:51,337 --> 00:22:55,417
I dreamed this corn stalk
grew way up in the sky
558
00:22:55,441 --> 00:22:58,253
and there were these two kids.
559
00:22:58,277 --> 00:22:59,277
And a giant.
560
00:23:00,613 --> 00:23:04,292
Oh and an ear of
corn six feet long.
561
00:23:04,316 --> 00:23:05,227
Oh boy.
562
00:23:05,251 --> 00:23:06,895
- What about my lemonade?
563
00:23:06,919 --> 00:23:09,998
- That was another nightmare.
564
00:23:10,022 --> 00:23:11,967
No, I mean it was part of the.
565
00:23:11,991 --> 00:23:14,737
- You don't have to apologize.
566
00:23:14,761 --> 00:23:16,805
Maybe the lemonade wasn't good.
567
00:23:16,829 --> 00:23:18,507
Like my cooking and sewing
568
00:23:18,531 --> 00:23:21,009
and everything else
I do around here.
569
00:23:21,033 --> 00:23:22,544
I guess I just
don't have the stuff
570
00:23:22,568 --> 00:23:25,647
which makes a woman
an American farm wife.
571
00:23:25,671 --> 00:23:28,917
- I never complained
about your stuffing.
572
00:23:28,941 --> 00:23:31,052
I like you just the way you are.
573
00:23:31,076 --> 00:23:32,153
- Do you?
574
00:23:32,177 --> 00:23:33,555
- Yes.
575
00:23:33,579 --> 00:23:36,492
- And I like you
just the way you are.
576
00:23:36,516 --> 00:23:38,226
- I guess we're
made for each other.
577
00:23:38,250 --> 00:23:41,397
- We are America's ideal couple.
578
00:23:41,421 --> 00:23:42,631
- I wouldn't go that far.
579
00:23:42,655 --> 00:23:44,633
- We're the
sweethearts of the world.
580
00:23:44,657 --> 00:23:47,369
The lovers of the century.
581
00:23:47,393 --> 00:23:48,270
- Lisa.
582
00:23:48,294 --> 00:23:50,294
- We're Romo and Julius.
583
00:23:51,631 --> 00:23:52,730
Antony and...
584
00:23:54,534 --> 00:23:56,044
What was the
name of the Irish girl
585
00:23:56,068 --> 00:23:57,568
he was engaged to?
586
00:23:58,838 --> 00:24:00,471
Oh yes, Cleopatrick.
587
00:24:02,475 --> 00:24:03,641
- Cleopatrick?
588
00:24:05,177 --> 00:24:06,822
Goodnight Lisa.
589
00:24:06,846 --> 00:24:08,957
- Goodnight sweet prince.
590
00:24:08,981 --> 00:24:11,593
Parting is such sweet sorrow.
591
00:24:11,617 --> 00:24:13,462
I'll turn out the light.
592
00:24:13,486 --> 00:24:15,798
Don't wake me up early tomorrow.
593
00:24:58,397 --> 00:25:02,165
This has been a FILMWAYS
presentation darling.
37445
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