Original subtitles

♫♫

(Horns honking)

(Peter bjorn and John's "young folks" playing)

(Gossip girl) Hey, upper east siders,

gossip girl here,

and I have the biggest news ever.

One of my many sources... Melanie91... sends us this...

Spotted at grand central, bags in hand...

Serena Van Der Woodsen.

Was it only a year ago

our "it" girl mysteriously disappeared

for "boarding school"?

And just as suddenly, she's back.

Don't believe me? See for yourselves.

(Camera phone shutter snaps)

Lucky for us, melanie91 sent proof.

Thanks for the photo, Mel.

(Man) Service to New Jersey...

Dan, Jenny, over here!

Hey, dad!

Hey, hey, you made it!

Welcome back.

How was your weekend? How's your mom?

Fine. (Jenny) She's good.

Uh, fine and good. She's... she's good and... and fine.

Like, "maybe I never should've left Manhattan" fine,

or "taking a time-out from my marriage

was the best idea I ever had" fine?

Dad, you know what? I-I am, uh, I'm starving.

♫ And we don't care about the young folks ♫

Let's go home. I'm cooking.

Caprese salad, a little mozzarella di bufala.

(Jenny laughs)

Yeah, I'm gonna make you guys...

Spotted... lonely boy.

Can't believe the love of his life has returned...

If only she knew who he was.

(Cell phones ringing) But everyone knows Serena,

and everyone is talking.

(Cell phone rings and vibrates)

Wonder what Blair Waldorf thinks.

Sure, they're b.F.F.S, but we always thought

Blair's boyfriend Nate had a thing for Serena.

(Rihanna) ♫ if it's lovin' that you want ♫

♫ you should make me your girl, your girl ♫

♫ if it's somethin' that you need ♫

♫ baby, come and share my world ♫

Design a dress for this woman.

Blair, if you're gonna wear one of my designs,

tell me so we can at least get it properly fitted.

Thanks, mom. Keep that in mind.

Great party.

(Chuckles)

She is my best advertisement.

So, Nate, you started thinking about college?

Well, actually, I'm a dartmouth man. Yes, dad's always spoken very highly of dartmouth,

but I'd like to check out west.

You know, maybe u.S.C., u.C.L.A... His mother wouldn't hear of it.

Dartmouth is far enough away for her.

Yes, well, dartmouth is my first choice.

Excuse me, captain.

Nate, can I borrow you?

Uh, sure. Will you excuse me for a second?

Nathaniel...

Any interest in some fresh air?

When I get back?

If he gets back.

♫♫

What's going on?

I wanna do this... It... now.

Now now? Yeah.

I thought you wanted to wait. Not anymore.

Better lock it down with Nate, b. Clock's ticking.

Oh, my god! You'll never believe what's on "gossip girl."

Someone saw Serena getting off the train at grand central.

Good. Things were getting a little dull around here.

(Justin Timberlake's "what goes around... comes around" playing)

Thank you.

I love you...

Nate Archibald.

Always have, always will.

I love you, too.

♫ Hey, girl, is he everything you wanted in a man? ♫

♫ You know I gave you the world ♫

Serena Van Der Woodsen? Is that you?!

(Knock on door)

(Mrs. Waldorf) Blair, it's Serena!

Serena?

Serena's at school.

Kiss me.

No, I just heard your mom say she's here.

Don't you wanna go say hey?

Yeah...

Totally.

(Girl) But I heard she was pregnant.

(Girl) No, but it's rehab. Sign me up for that. (Boy) She looks good.

So I told him, "forget it.

I don't care if it's murakami. It clashes with my sofa." (Laughs)

Mom. Mom.

Hey.

Oh! Hey, good to see you.

Serena, darling. Oh!

Um, so where is he?

What, they haven't let him out yet?

(Lowered voice) Oh, let's not discuss that right now, okay?

I thought you might wanna see some of your friends.

(Scoffs) Thanks.

♫ What goes around, goes around, goes around ♫

♫ comes all the way back around ♫

♫ what goes around, goes around, goes around ♫

♫ comes all the way back around ♫

Hi! Hi!

Serena! It's so good to see you! How are you? Good to see you!

Come, we're about to have dinner. I'll set a place for you at the table next to Blair.

Yeah, actually, um, there's somewhere I have to go.

You're leaving? Yeah, I-I just... I don't feel well.

Aw. I just wanted to come by and say hi.

I'll see you at school tomorrow.

♫ Said that you were moving on now, on now ♫

School? So I guess she's back for good.

Didn't you know she was coming?

Of course I did.

I just... wanted it to be a surprise.

Word is that s. Bailed on b.'S party

in under 90 seconds

and didn't even have one limoncello.

Has our bad girl really gone good?

Or is it all just part of the act?

Young lady, you can't be here. Visiting hours are over.

I'm family.

He's my brother.

Why'd she leave? Why'd she return?

Send me all the deets. And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell...

The only one.

X.o.x.o., gossip girl.

♫♫

Serena?

Serena?

Hey.

Hey, how are you?

You know... I've been better.

Eric, I know I've been a terrible sister...

Oh, I'm just so happy to see you.

Must be a lot of rumors why you're back.

Yeah, but none of them mention you.

Just like mom wants, huh? What do I want, baby?

For Serena to sleep in her own bed, possibly wearing pajamas.

Morning, mom.

Hey, I was just about to ask the doctor

if I could take Eric to breakfast. Wanna come?

Um... no.

I think what I'll do is go get him a croissant down the street.

Serena, don't.

Let me guess... you told everyone

Eric's just visiting grandpa in Rhode Island. Your aunt Carol in Miami.

So you're actually hiding him? He tries to take his own life,

and you're worried it's gonna cost you "mom of the year"? Serena, you've been gone,

doing who knows what with god knows who...

I told you, boarding school was not like that. Then you know what?

As happy as I am to have you home,

you have no idea what it's been like.

(Elevator bell dings)

♫♫

Guess whose dad is cool?

It's a trick question. Yeah, 'cause it can't be ours.

Ha ha, ha ha. Look at this.

"Top ten forgotten bands of the '90s."

Yeah, check out who's number nine.

He's very proud. Mm-hmm.

Hey! Hey, way to be forgotten. But that's how you get remembered.

Maybe you'd care if dad's band was on "gossip girl."

What? I don't read "gossip girl."

That's... that's for chicks. So that wasn't your laptop open to it last night

reading all about Serena Van Der Woodsen? "Rolling stone"? Wow.

Let me take a look at this again, dad. Très cool.

(Dan) Lincoln hawk... Number nine.

Hey, what are you working on? It's called the kiss on the lips party.

Everyone's going.

You were invited to that?

Well, no offense if I sound surprised

since I've never been invited. One of the girls in my art class saw my calligraphy,

and she said that if I addressed all the invitations

that I could have one. Sounds very fair. The sweatshops could learn a thing or two.

Dad, this is not a platform

for one of your anticapitalist rants. Yes, it is.

Besides, you make us go to private school. That's for your education.

So we should just be anonymous losers who eat lunch alone

and never get invited to parties? (Dan) Works for me.

Mom thinks it's a good idea. And her judgment is always sound, right?

♫♫

Jenny, you wanna go to that party, you should go.

You kids could use some fun.

(Horns honking)

Nate?

Oh, hey.

Uh, your mom told me

you guys were staying here at the palace.

Yeah, uh, we're renovating again.

You know my mom... If it's not broke, break it. (Laughs)

So what are you doing here?

Oh, I just wanted to see how you were.

You seemed kind of upset last night.

I-I gotta get going and change for school. I'm gonna be late. Serena...

No. No.

But you're back now... I didn't come back for you.

Look, Blair's my best friend, and you're her boyfriend,

and she loves you.

That's the way things are supposed to be.

(Horn honks)

(Man) Hey, watch where you're going!

(Horn honks)

Serena looked effing hot last night.

There's something wrong with that level of perfection.

It needs to be violated.

You are deeply disturbed. And yet, you know I'm right.

You're telling me if you had the chance... I have a girlfriend.

You guys have been dating since kindergarten

and you haven't sealed the deal.

Who says, "seal the deal"?

(Chuckles) Come on.

Are you following us or something?

No, I-I go to your school.

Identical uniforms? Is that kind of a tip-off?

That's funny.

(Clears throat)

So you guys wanna sit together at lunch?

(Girl) So cute! (Girl) These should be framed or something.

Not bad work.

And here's yours, as promised.

Thanks.

Hey.

Here you guys are.

I looked all over the dining hall for you.

Oh, hi, I'm Serena.

I know. I mean, hi, I'm Jenny.

Hi. (Laughs nervously)

So...

When's the party?

Saturday.

And... You're kinda not invited...

Since until 12 hours ago,

everyone thought you were at boarding school.

Now we're full, and, uh, Jenny used up all the invites.

Um, actually... you can go now.

Sorry.

No, that's okay.

I got a lot of stuff to do anyway.

Well, we should get going then.

Unless you want us to wait for you.

Looks like you got a lot of yogurt left. No, go ahead.

Blair, think we could meet tonight?

I'd love to,

but I'm doing something with Nate tonight.

The palace. 8:00?

Nate will wait. Spotted on the steps of the met...

An s. And b. Power struggle.

I could probably do a half-hour.

Did s. Think she could waltz home,

and things would be just like they were? Thanks for making the time.

You're my best friend.

Did b. Think s. Would go down without a fight?

Or can these two hotties work it out?

There's nothing gossip girl likes more

than a good catfight,

and this could be a classic.

Uh, you know... you know, dad,

there's this thing called MySpace

where you can post all this information online.

Save some trees. Have a blog.

Maybe if musicians got off their blogs

and picked up their guitars,

the music business would be in better shape.

Spoken like a true relic. Thanks, son.

(Cell phone rings and vibrates)

(The mooney suzuki's "99%" playing)

Hey, dad, listen, um, I gotta run. Are you gonna be okay?

Yeah. Yeah, your mom will be back.

She's always been a free spirit.

That's one of the reasons I fell for her in the first place.

I meant with the fliers.

♫♫

(Laughs) Luckily, staple guns are old school.

♫ Sing ♫ ♫ na, na, na, na ♫

Go. I'm gonna be fine. All right.

♫ Na, na, na, na ♫

I talked to the nurse, and I'm kidnapping you. We're going shopping, aren't we?

We're going to Bendel's, just for an hour, though, I swear.

I had a really bad day. Really? 'Cause I had a great day...

A couple of pills, bunch of rorschach tests.

They had this green jell-o for lunch. Mmm! Why didn't you save me any? Come on, let's go.

We gotta get you out of here before mom shows up.

♫♫

Jenny, what is it?

What's wrong?

Do you like this on me?

Wait... wait a second. Is that why you needed me?

I thought this was an emergency. A fashion emergency.

I mean come on, I've never been to a big dance before. Neither have I.

Yeah, but mom's gone, and dad's allergic to department stores.

♫♫

Well, you look good, Jen.

You do, really.

Thanks.

I mean, too bad it's more than our rent,

but I think I can sew something like it.

Oh, my gosh, it's Serena.

Hi, Serena!

(Serena) Hey!

♫♫

Hey. Jenny, right? Yeah. Hi.

This is my...

Stylist and personal shopper Eric. Hi. (Laughs)

Uh, hi. Um, this is my brother.

Or...

Um, so is... is that your dress for the kiss on the lips party?

Sort of.

Speaking of that, um, here.

I made you one during free period,

but if anyone asks where you got it, I know nothing.

Thanks.

♫♫

Dan? Dan?

Jenny?

That dress would look even better in black.

Black. Cool. Thanks.

(Woman) ♫ all the ladies say hey ♫

This is some good stuff.

Yeah, I'm gonna need it.

Blair's mom's at the country house.

Yeah? Well, then maybe I should swipe some of my dad's Viagra...

Or my mom's Paxil?

Nathaniel, you're finally about to have sex

with your girlfriend.

It's like you're headed to your execution.

No, man, I'm good.

Talk to Chuck, buddy.

You and Blair have been dating forever.

All of a sudden there's a problem? There's no problem.

It's just...

Do you ever feel like

our whole lives have been planned out for us,

that we're just gonna end up like our parents?

Man, that's a dark thought.

And aren't we entitled to choose, just to be happy? Look, easy, socrates.

What we're entitled to is a trust fund,

maybe a house in the Hamptons, a prescription drug problem.

But happiness does not seem to be on the menu,

so smoke up and seal the deal with Blair,

'cause you're also entitled to tap that ass.

♫♫

So how's your mom doing with the divorce and everything?

Great.

So my dad left her for another man.

She lost 15 pounds, got an eye lift.

It's been good for her. I'm really sorry.

Yeah, I could tell, since you didn't call or write

the entire time it was happening.

No, I-I know, I was just... Boarding school is like... I don't even know why

you went to boarding school to being with.

Do you know how it felt

calling your house when you didn't show up at school

and having your mom say, "Serena didn't tell you

that she moved to Connecticut?"

I just... I-I had to go. I just...

I needed to get away from everything.

Please, just trust me.

How can I trust you when I feel like I don't even know you?

Let's fix that.

I saw you at school with... with Katy and is,

and I-I get it.

I-I don't want to take any of that away from you...

Because it's just yours to take if you want it.

No, that... that's not what I mean. I...

I miss you.

I just want things to go back to the way they used to be...

You know, walking to school together,

dancing on tables at bungalow,

night swimming at your mom's country house.

You were like my sister.

You know, and with our families...

We need each other.

(Chuckles)

Well...

You missed some classic Eleanor Waldorf meltdowns.

If it wasn't such a tragedy, it would've been funny.

Actually, it kind of was.

(Both laugh)

Hmm, well, I wish I could've been there.

You are now.

I have to meet Nate.

Kinda have something special planned.

Well, I don't want to keep you, but, um...

I love you, b.

I love you, too, s.

Spotted at the palace hotel...

S. And b. Having a heart-to-heart.

Hmm, why so thirsty, s.?

You may have won over b. For now,

but we still think you're hiding something.

(Sewing machine whirs)

(Door closes)

Hey.

Ah, the invisible man returns.

You know, I really had no idea you could move that fast.

Yeah, well, uh, your fashion emergency was solved,

so I figured my work was done. Come on, Dan.

Serena said hi to you at a ninth grade birthday party,

and you've never forgotten it. How could I? She was the only person who spoke to me.

And I'm pretty sure she thought I was someone else.

You know, she's actually nice.

And if she did know you, I think she'd really like you.

I don't know. I think she might be a tad overwhelmed

by the glitz and the glamour of the Humphrey lifestyle.

Well, I heard she's living at the palace hotel...

Well, my... my point exactly.

Probably sitting at the bar by herself,

sipping Martinis, all alone.

You know, it's actually kind of sad.

Oh, and, um, dad's at the gallery working late.

He, uh, left money for dinner,

so I was thinking Indian.

You know... you know what? I think I'm...

I'm gonna go out.

♫♫

Okay.

(Lowered voice) Good, 'cause I already ordered

and only got enough for one.

(Whirring resumes)

♫♫

Move, please.

I love this town.

I'm going to have to tell my parents

the hotel they just bought is serving minors.

And if you get a drink, they're also serving pigs.

(Exhales deeply) I love it when you talk dirty. You just love when a girl talks to you.

Actually, I prefer them when they're not talking.

Mm, I've missed your witty banter.

Let's catch up, take our clothes off, stare at each other.

(Scoffs) How about I just get a bite to eat?

I've been drinking on an empty stomach.

I heard you didn't do that anymore.

Special occasion.

Oh.

Well, how about a grilled cheese with truffle oil?

You do love truffles.

Enough to know it's not on the menu.

Good thing I'm connected.

♫♫

Whoa.

Only 'cause I'm hungry.

♫♫

Wow.

Hi.

Hi.

Is it too much?

I want it to be special.

What's wrong?

Look, I don't know how to say this...

Or if it's even the right thing to do,

but, um...

There's something I need to tell you.

Alfonso, you're a stud.

Now, uh, have a good night. We're closing the kitchen early.

Oh, my god. This is so good.

Well, if you're looking for a way to thank me,

I've got a couple ideas.

It's a sandwich, Chuck.

♫♫

(Scoffs) This is... mnh-mnh.

This is not happening right now.

You worried Nate'll find out?

What?

Last year... The Shepherd wedding.

You think I don't know why you left town?

Come on, hurry up.

You know we're not supposed to be in here. Oh, if the happy couple didn't want

to put up the cash for the premium bar,

they should have made their wedding b.Y.O.B.

No! Let me see it.

No, make me. I can do it. I can do it.

No, you can't. Let me just show you. Here, come here. Let me see it.

I can do it. Stop. Let me see it.

Ooh! Oh, no.

(Laughs) Nate! That never happens to me.

It's okay. You're still a man in my eyes.

Come here.

Look at you. You're a mess.

So are you.

♫♫

But... that was it.

You guys kissed.

Best friend and the boyfriend.

That's pretty classy, s.

I think you're more like me than you'd admit.

No.

No, that... that was then. I... I'm trying to change.

I liked you better before.

Chuck, stop it. Stop.

No! Chuck, stop it!

(Breathes heavily)

I knew it! I always knew there was something! Get out!

Chuck! No!

(Crying)

♫♫

Get off of me!

(Grunts)

(Indistinct conversations)

Oh! Oh!

(Crash) I'm so sorry.

Are... are you okay?

(Gossip girl) And just when b. And s. Had built a bridge,

it all had to come crashing down.

But dry your eyes.

The kiss on the lips party is around the corner.

And you know who loves parties? Gossip girl.

(Both panting)

Nice try, son.

(Chuckles) Maybe next time.

You seem upbeat this morning.

Did you have fun with Blair last night?

Actually, we got into a pretty big fight. Oh, you want my advice?

Apologize, even if it was her fault.

Flowers, maybe some jewelry if she's really upset.

Always works for your mom. I don't know. I think it might be for the best.

Wait a minute. You guys broke up?

Yeah, I guess we did.

Blair is a great girl.

I know. I'm just not sure if she's the girl for me.

And you guys have been dating since kindergarten. So I keep hearing.

Well, you love her, don't you? Yes, I do.

I just think

it might be good for us to take a break, you know?

Maybe not right now.

Eleanor Waldorf is gearing up to take her company public,

and I've been courting her for months

to let me handle the deal. Then you should get it.

I will get it. If you could just help me out a little bit...

What? You love her. She loves you.

It's just a rough patch, that's all.

You don't give up just because things are hard,

not in business, or if your family is depending on you.

How do you know it was miss Van Der Woodsen's

if you didn't read it?

And if you're not a guest at the hotel,

what were you doing here? What?

Uh, look, when prince charming found cinderella's slipper,

they didn't accuse him of having a foot fetish.

Uh, and you're prince charming? Well...

Well, there's miss Van Der Woodsen now. No, no!

Uh, Serena? No, no, no, no, no.

What are you doing? Don't. Hey, um, do you know this young man?

She doesn't know me. Nobody knows me.

It's cool. It's fine.

Uh... from last night.

Are you...

Um, I'm sorry about that.

You remember me?

She remembers me.

Well, he claims he found your cell phone.

Oh! You found it.

Hey, mom. Guess what I got for you... A dress for kiss on the lips.

I saw the invitation on the nightstand.

Oh, uh, I'm not going to that. What do you mean? Blair's throwing it.

Yeah, um, see, the problem is, um,

by... by the time I got the invitation,

I, um, actually already had plans.

Plans with whom?

My friend.

Uh... yeah, hi.

Uh, nice to meet you, Mrs. Van Der Woodsen.

I'm Dan Humphrey.

What are you and Dan Humphrey doing?

We...

Uh...

Uh, uh, we're... we're going to a concert tonight.

Lincoln hawk? Yeah, "rolling stone" named them

one of the top ten forgotten bands of the '90s.

Whoo! I'm a huge fan.

Mm. Well, this party would've been the perfect opportunity

for you to announce your return,

but I guess I'll just, uh, keep the dress for myself.

Thank you.

Yeah, no, uh... It's not a problem, really.

So you'll pick me up at 8:00?

You'd really go out with some guy you don't know?

Well, you can't be worse than the guys I do know.

(Cold war kids' "hang me up to dry" playing)

Thanks for meeting me.

Look, Blair, I-I really hurt you,

and I know that, and I wanna fix it.

Really? And how are you gonna do that? I'm gonna put everything in the past.

I'm not gonna see Serena again or even talk to her.

It'll be like she doesn't exist.

♫ Splashing around in the muck and the mire ♫

I think that's a good idea. Let's not mention it again.

You gonna eat that?

That's it?

'Cause you were pretty upset last night.

I mean, should we talk about this? There's nothing to talk about.

I overreacted.

If you say it's in the past, it's in the past.

I'm sure you have no feelings for her anymore.

♫ Now hang me up to dry ♫

I just feel bad for Serena. She'll really miss you.

What time does the limo come? 8:00.

Perfect.

♫ Now hang me up to dry ♫

(The bravery's "time won't let me go" playing)

(Chuckles) Lily.

Are you shopping for some art to match your furniture?

Why is my daughter going to one of your concerts?

'Cause we're awesome.

With your son.

Dan scored a date with Serena?

Mm-hmm. Well, our kids were bound to meet.

It's a small island. Are you sure it's not some ploy, your using my daughter

to get to me now that your wife left you? How do you know about Alison?

Like you said... small island.

Oh, I get it.

You hear about Alison,

use your daughter as an excuse to start something.

Yeah. (Laughs) In your dreams.

Well, you are in my dreams, Lily,

and one in particular recurs... It involves finding you

in the back of a nine inch nails bus

with your shoes in your earrings and Trent reznor...

Oh. (Chuckles) That happened.

(Chuckles) No need to rehash details of decades past.

So I moved on...

Yeah, from Trent to Layne to Perry,

till you switched up rock stars for billionaires.

You think you're so cute...

Washed-up band, crappy so-called art gallery.

Well, not all of us have settlements

from multiple divorces to sustain us.

Just stay out of my life, Rufus.

♫ Ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba, ba ba ba ♫

♫ ba, ba ba ba ba ♫

You're going out with Serena,

and I'm going to kiss on the lips.

Who said this family wasn't cool? Mm-hmm.

Well, listen, I don't want to be late, but good luck, all right?

(Jenny) Same.

(Rufus sighs)

See you at the concert, right, dad?

Uh... okay.

(Door opens, closes)

Oh, my god.

My daughter's a woman.

Dad, you could just tell me I look nice

instead of turning this

into a sermon on the passage of time.

You look like...

Your mother.

Thanks.

Mmm.

Blair, let me see how it looks.

Why are you wearing that one?

Didn't you see the dress I left on the bed?

I like this one.

This one is not as elegant a choice as that one.

Why do you care so much?

Because I love you.

Blair, you will never be more beautiful or thin or happy

than you are right now.

I just want you to make the most of it.

I guess I have time to change.

And put some product in your hair. The ends are dry.

(Scoffs)

(Albert Hammond Jr.'s "hard to live in the city" playing)

♫ well, it's hard to live ♫

♫ it's hard to live ♫

♫ in the city ♫

♫ yes, it's hard to live ♫

♫ so hard to live ♫

♫ in the city ♫

♫ so just lay your head down low ♫

♫ don't let anybody know ♫

♫ that's it's hard to live ♫

♫ it's hard to live in the city ♫

♫ there's something about you ♫

♫ that I couldn't tell ♫

♫ and you were always crazy ♫

♫ there's something about you ♫

(Timbaland's "the way I are" playing)

♫ yeah, yeah ♫

♫ yeah, yeah ♫

♫ I ain't got no money ♫

♫ I ain't got no car to take you on a date ♫

♫ I can't even buy you flowers ♫

♫ but together we be perfect soul mates ♫

♫ talk to me, girl ♫ who's the newbie?

Jenny Humphrey. She's a freshman.

I love freshmen. They're so...

Fresh?

Anything about her on "gossip girl"?

No. Hmm, until you're done with her.

(Keri hilson) ♫ thug it out till we get it right ♫

(Timbaland) ♫ I ain't got no visa ♫

Hi. I'm Chuck.

I know. Um, I mean... (Laughs) Hi, I'm... I'm Jenny.

It's, uh, it's nice to meet you.

You, too.

Thank you.

(Gossip girl) Looks like little j. Might end up with

a new boy and a ticket to the inner circle.

Or will c. End up with another victim?

I told you I love parties.

(Keri hilson) ♫ just you and me ♫

Honestly, I don't really have a problem with your appearance.

(Men speaking indistinctly)

Hey, come on. I want you to meet one of the guys in the band.

Oh, so you're a groupie?

Well, not quite.

Serena, I'd like you to meet Rufus Humphrey.

Dad, this is Serena.

Serena Van Der Woodsen.

(Laughs) Oh, uh, I don't know how I know that.

Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you, too.

You guys are a little early.

It's gonna be a while before we take the stage.

Yeah, I-I may have slightly overbudgeted for travel time.

♫♫

(Man) Hey.

I should go tune that. Excuse me. Enjoy the show.

Son, talk to you later.

Dad, see you.

♫♫

You took me to meet your dad on a first date?

So this... this is a date?

♫♫

Oh.

Maybe I should've worn my loafers then... (Laughs)

Dressed down a little bit.

Let's go and talk somewhere quieter.

Okay.

(Nivea and akon's "nobody" playing)

Well, this is definitely quieter,

but, um, do you actually know where we're going or...

Here looks pretty good.

♫ But it don't matter, no ♫

So... uh, you said you wanted to talk.

Um, what'd you want to talk about?

How into you I am.

♫ Believe we gon' fight ♫

♫ fight for our right to love, yeah ♫

♫ nobody wanna see us together ♫

♫ but it don't matter, no ♫

Okay, I'm... I'm sorry. Uh...

(Laughs nervously)

If you don't want to do anything, that's... that's cool.

Let... let's start over. Yeah.

Yeah? Um, do you want to start over back at the party?

Uh, have a glass of champagne. Please?

(Chuckles) Maybe one.

♫♫

Thanks.

Mm.

(Laughs) What?

Sorry. No, nothing, nothing. I just, um...

My sister was right. You're nice.

But you asked me out on a date, and you didn't think I was nice?

No, uh, I just thought you were hot.

Uh... And technically, you asked me out.

(Laughs)

Oh, okay. Okay, I see.

So, um, sensitive, tortured soul boy

is actually kinda superficial, huh? (Cell phone rings)

Yeah, just... just a little bit. Good to know.

(Laughs)

Sorry.

(Siren wailing in distance)

(Cell phone rings, beep)

What, better offer? No, it's my sister.

She's at that kiss on the lips party, you know?

She's having some problems with this guy Chuck.

I'm sorry. I have to go. I'll go with you.

No, really, that's okay.

No, no, listen. If it's Chuck, it's not okay.

(Man) ♫ calm and confident, calculating... ♫

(Rapping indistinctly)

Look, I'm... I'm gonna do a lap, okay? Look for her.

Okay, yeah.

(Girl) Serena? (Girl) It's Serena! Oh, my god!

(Boy) What?! (Girl) She's really here?

(Boy) Is that really her?

Everyone said she wasn't invited. (Cell phones ring)

(Boy) I think she's wasted. (Girl) Do you think Blair knows?

(Girl) What's she wearing? (Girl) What's with that dress? She's so brave.

(Boy) You know Serena... She'd never miss a party.

(Cell phones ring)

(Both) Serena's here?!

What is she doing here? She wasn't invited.

(Music continues)

Blair, come on, are you really gonna kick her out?

Did you invite her?

What? No! God, I told you...

Do not talk to her.

I was going for a walk.

♫♫

(Music continues)

(Grunts) No! (Whispers) Quiet.

(Grunts) Stop!

Hey, no luck?

No, I haven't seen her anywhere.

Come on. Let's try upstairs.

All right.

♫♫

There isn't gonna be anybody up here. This is pointless.

Dan. What?

That's Chuck's scarf.

Oh, god.

Get off! Stop! Hey! Jenny!

(Serena) Chuck, get off of her! Are you okay?

(Jenny) Yeah.

You son of a...

What the hell is your problem?! It's a party. Things happen.

Who are you, anyway?

How many times do I have to tell you?

I'm in your class.

My name is Dan Humphrey,

and that is my little sister!

(Grunts)

Come on, Dan. Let's go. Come on.

Chuck, don't you ever touch her again!

Hey, your life is over, slut! Don't forget, I know everything!

(Angels & airwaves' "the gift" playing)

You sure you're okay?

Yeah, I will be. Just take me home, okay?

♫ There's a strangest excitement today ♫

♫ if you're awake, then you're welcome to hear ♫

♫ I've got a gift, and it blew me away ♫

So... think I got a shot at a second date?

(Chuckles) Well, I don't think you could top this one.

I did punch someone.

True.

We'll talk about it in the cab.

♫ It's like the rush has gone straight to my brain ♫

♫ but my voice is as lonely as loud ♫

♫ as I whisper a joy of this pain ♫

♫ and suddenly ♫

She better not show her face again.

I'm actually hoping she will.

♫ You won me over ♫

♫ in no time at all ♫

♫ and now ♫

♫ I'll stop the storm if it rains ♫

♫ I'll light a path far from here ♫

♫ I'll make your fear melt away ♫

Spotted... Serena making a heroic exit

from b.'S party.

Too bad for her there's school on Monday.

So until next time...

You know you love me... Gossip girl.