All language subtitles for Betty.Whites.Off.Their.Rockers.S03E06.Bettys.Second.Career.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-FLUX_track3_[eng]

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,576 --> 00:00:14,231 HI. CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING? 2 00:00:15,406 --> 00:00:17,104 - CAN YOU HOLD THAT A SECOND? - SURE. 3 00:00:17,278 --> 00:00:19,758 MY STUPID GRANDSON GAVE ME THAT, AND I JUST HATE IT. 4 00:00:19,932 --> 00:00:21,934 DON'T YOU HATE SCENTED CANDLES? 5 00:00:32,902 --> 00:00:34,208 HI! 6 00:00:34,382 --> 00:00:35,992 GOOD, GOOD, GOOD, GOOD, GOOD. 7 00:00:36,645 --> 00:00:38,908 COMPLIMENTS OF THAT LOVELY WOMAN. 8 00:00:39,082 --> 00:00:40,910 BRIEFS, BOXERS, OR COMMANDO. 9 00:00:47,308 --> 00:00:50,572 MANY ADULTS ARE PURSUING SECOND CAREERS LATER IN LIFE. 10 00:00:50,746 --> 00:00:53,923 I RECENTLY DECIDED THAT I WANTED TO GO DOWN THE PATH 11 00:00:54,097 --> 00:00:57,318 I WOULD HAVE TAKEN HAD I NOT GONE INTO FILM AND TV -- 12 00:00:57,492 --> 00:00:58,841 ARTIST. 13 00:01:00,886 --> 00:01:02,888 JUST TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF WHENEVER YOU'RE READY. 14 00:01:05,413 --> 00:01:08,242 I THINK I'M GONNA NEED A BIGGER CANVAS. 15 00:01:13,508 --> 00:01:15,031 HI! 16 00:01:15,205 --> 00:01:17,251 I'M ON THE COSTUME COMMITTEE, AND I HAVE TO SAY, 17 00:01:17,425 --> 00:01:20,341 YOU HAVE ONE OF THE MOST REALISTIC COSTUMES 18 00:01:20,515 --> 00:01:22,299 WE'VE SEEN TODAY. I TOLD MY PANEL OF JUDGES 19 00:01:22,473 --> 00:01:25,302 THAT THEY HAVE TO CHECK OUT CAPTAIN NEVER-BEEN-LAID. 20 00:01:25,476 --> 00:01:28,305 IT LOOKS LIKE YOU SPENT A LOT OF TIME PUTTING IT TOGETHER. 21 00:01:28,479 --> 00:01:30,177 DID YOU? A LITTLE. 22 00:01:30,351 --> 00:01:31,917 WELL, IT'S A GREAT CHARACTER 23 00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:34,529 AND IT LOOKS WONDERFUL, YOU KNOW? 24 00:01:34,703 --> 00:01:36,226 HAVE A GREAT DAY. 25 00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:37,967 OKAY. OKAY. 26 00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:59,423 HELLO. I'M A SECRET SHOPPER. 27 00:01:59,597 --> 00:02:01,773 Woman: HOW HAS YOUR SHOPPING EXPERIENCE BEEN? 28 00:02:01,947 --> 00:02:04,167 GOOD? 29 00:02:04,341 --> 00:02:05,734 SHH! 30 00:02:05,908 --> 00:02:07,170 IT'S A SECRET. 31 00:02:22,794 --> 00:02:24,274 HI. COULD I ASK YOU A QUESTION? 32 00:02:24,448 --> 00:02:25,971 IF YOU DON'T MIND? 33 00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:28,060 I'M ABOUT TO CHANGE MY NAME BECAUSE OF CERTAIN REASONS, 34 00:02:28,235 --> 00:02:30,237 AND I'D LIKE YOUR OPINION, IF YOU DON'T MIND. 35 00:02:30,411 --> 00:02:31,760 SO, HERE'S THE NAMES I'M THINKING ABOUT. 36 00:02:31,934 --> 00:02:33,588 HOW'S MR. QBALL? 37 00:02:33,762 --> 00:02:36,591 HOW'S THAT? 38 00:02:36,765 --> 00:02:37,896 HOW ABOUT MR. CHROMEDOME? 39 00:02:38,070 --> 00:02:39,289 YOU LIKE THAT ONE? 40 00:02:39,463 --> 00:02:40,595 NO? NO GOOD? 41 00:02:40,769 --> 00:02:42,814 HOW ABOUT DADDY WARBUCKS? 42 00:02:42,988 --> 00:02:44,468 NO GOOD? 43 00:02:44,642 --> 00:02:46,340 NO DADDY WARBUCKS. NO. 44 00:02:46,514 --> 00:02:48,559 I THINK I'M JUST GONNA KEEP MY REGULAR NAME. 45 00:02:48,733 --> 00:02:49,821 YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS? 46 00:02:49,995 --> 00:02:51,736 MR. BALDYLOCKS. 47 00:02:51,910 --> 00:02:53,564 HEY, THANKS FOR THE HELP. 48 00:02:53,738 --> 00:02:55,914 YOUR SUGGESTIONS WERE WONDERFUL. THANK YOU SO MUCH. 49 00:02:56,088 --> 00:02:57,829 THAT'S GREAT. 50 00:03:04,793 --> 00:03:05,924 Man: EXCUSE ME. 51 00:03:06,098 --> 00:03:08,275 DO YOU KNOW HOW TO TEXT A PICTURE? 52 00:03:08,449 --> 00:03:10,625 DO YOU KNOW HOW TO TEXT A PICTURE? 53 00:03:10,799 --> 00:03:12,975 - TEXT A PICTURE? YEAH. - YEAH, YEAH. 54 00:03:13,149 --> 00:03:14,846 YOU KNOW, I MET THIS GIRL AT A BAR. 55 00:03:15,020 --> 00:03:16,500 AND WE WERE HAVING SO MUCH FUN, 56 00:03:16,674 --> 00:03:18,110 WE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THE BAR WAS CLOSING. 57 00:03:18,285 --> 00:03:19,764 SO I TEXTED HER THE NEXT DAY... OKAY. 58 00:03:19,938 --> 00:03:21,201 ...AND SHE NEVER TEXTED ME BACK. 59 00:03:21,375 --> 00:03:22,941 BUT I WANT TO SEND HER THIS PICTURE. 60 00:03:23,115 --> 00:03:24,421 OH, MY GOSH. 61 00:03:24,595 --> 00:03:26,206 DO YOU THINK THAT'S NOT APPROPRIATE? 62 00:03:26,380 --> 00:03:27,642 NO, IT'S NOT. IT'S INAPPROPRIATE. 63 00:03:27,816 --> 00:03:29,296 OH. 64 00:03:29,470 --> 00:03:32,124 I WOULD FEEL... CAN YOU PLEASE GET AWAY FROM ME? 65 00:03:32,299 --> 00:03:34,301 YEAH. OKAY. SORRY. 66 00:03:34,475 --> 00:03:35,911 THANK YOU, THOUGH. 67 00:03:45,268 --> 00:03:48,228 Man: OH, HONEY, THANK YOU FOR SUCH A WONDERFUL DAY. 68 00:03:48,402 --> 00:03:50,186 IT'S SO GOOD BEING WITH YOU AND HAVING A GREAT TIME. 69 00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:51,535 THANK YOU. I'M HAVING SO MUCH FUN. 70 00:03:51,709 --> 00:03:53,363 HERE, LET ME HAVE YOU SIT DOWN RIGHT HERE. 71 00:03:53,537 --> 00:03:54,799 AND I'M GONNA RUN TO THE RESTROOM. 72 00:03:54,973 --> 00:03:56,061 I'LL BE RIGHT --OH, THANK YOU. 73 00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:58,325 WHOA. AH. OH, IT LOOKS GOOD. 74 00:03:58,499 --> 00:04:01,110 ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU SO MUCH, WALTER. 75 00:04:01,284 --> 00:04:02,851 I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. 76 00:04:03,025 --> 00:04:05,201 ISN'T SHE BEAUTIFUL? 77 00:04:05,375 --> 00:04:08,422 OH, YEAH. 78 00:04:35,797 --> 00:04:38,234 EW. THAT'S DISGUSTING. 79 00:04:38,408 --> 00:04:40,671 WHO -- WHO DID THAT? 80 00:04:40,845 --> 00:04:42,238 HE DID. 81 00:04:54,772 --> 00:04:59,386 THEY SAY YOU CAN TELL EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT A WOMAN 82 00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:01,431 FROM WHAT'S IN HER PURSE. 83 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:06,436 THAT'S WHY I CARRY NOTHING BUT MY AUTOBIOGRAPHY. 84 00:05:06,610 --> 00:05:10,571 I WANT TO BE SURE THEY GET ALL THE FACTS STRAIGHT. 85 00:05:14,444 --> 00:05:15,663 EXCUSE ME. 86 00:05:15,837 --> 00:05:17,534 I HAVE DROPPED THIS, AND IT WAS LIKE... 87 00:05:17,708 --> 00:05:19,406 CAN YOU JUST HOLD THIS FOR ONE SECOND? 88 00:05:19,580 --> 00:05:21,625 I AM HOPING THAT I CAN RECTIFY THIS 89 00:05:21,799 --> 00:05:24,454 'CAUSE I'D GET IN ALL THE TROUBLE IN THE WORLD. 90 00:05:24,628 --> 00:05:26,935 I'M JUST GONNA PUT SOME GLUE IN THERE. 91 00:05:27,109 --> 00:05:28,980 I'M THINKING IF I JUST DO THAT 92 00:05:29,154 --> 00:05:31,766 AND I JUST LET IT SET AWHILE, IT'LL ALL BE FINE. 93 00:05:31,940 --> 00:05:33,028 YOU KNOW? THANKS. 94 00:05:33,202 --> 00:05:35,509 APPRECIATE IT. 95 00:05:50,611 --> 00:05:53,570 OH. IT'S YOGA. 96 00:06:01,143 --> 00:06:04,581 ONE OF THE BIGGEST DANGERS CONFRONTING SENIORS TODAY 97 00:06:04,755 --> 00:06:08,585 IS NOT BEING ABLE TO GET HELP IN THE EVENT OF AN EMERGENCY. 98 00:06:08,759 --> 00:06:11,893 THAT'S WHY I DEVELOPED BETTY WHITE'S LIFE ALERT. 99 00:06:12,067 --> 00:06:15,200 THIS BUTTON IS FOR WHEN YOU'RE DYING OF HUNGER. 100 00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:18,247 IT CONNECTS YOU DIRECTLY TO PIZZA DELIVERY. 101 00:06:18,421 --> 00:06:22,251 THIS BUTTON IS FOR WHEN YOU'RE DESPERATE FOR ENTERTAINMENT. 102 00:06:22,425 --> 00:06:25,994 IT CONNECTS YOU DIRECTLY TO "GAME OF THRONES" MARATHON. 103 00:06:26,168 --> 00:06:29,519 AND THIS BUTTON IS FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALL ALONE IN BED 104 00:06:29,693 --> 00:06:31,391 IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. 105 00:06:33,131 --> 00:06:36,483 YOU SEE WHERE I'M GOING WITH THIS, RIGHT? 106 00:06:36,657 --> 00:06:39,094 ♪ OOH, OOH, OOH ♪ 107 00:06:39,268 --> 00:06:42,184 MAN, COULD I TROUBLE YOU FOR ONE SECOND? 108 00:06:42,358 --> 00:06:45,143 MY DOCTOR SAYS I GOT TO DO 10,000 STEPS. 109 00:06:45,317 --> 00:06:46,841 MY FOOT IS HURTING LIKE HELL. 110 00:06:47,015 --> 00:06:49,887 WOULD YOU PUT ON THIS PEDOMETER AND DO SOME STEPS? 111 00:06:50,061 --> 00:06:51,541 YEAH, RIGHT, RIGHT, RIGHT. 112 00:06:51,715 --> 00:06:54,718 OH, THIS IS GOOD. 113 00:06:54,892 --> 00:06:56,590 MY NUMBERS ARE UP. 114 00:06:56,764 --> 00:06:57,939 OH, THIS IS GOOD. 115 00:06:58,113 --> 00:07:00,158 THAT'S PRETTY GOOD. 116 00:07:00,332 --> 00:07:01,682 OH, IT WENT UP. 117 00:07:01,856 --> 00:07:03,379 YEAH! OKAY, NEXT. 118 00:07:03,553 --> 00:07:06,077 THANK YOU. 119 00:07:10,081 --> 00:07:12,257 SIR, DO YOU KNOW HOW FRAGILE YOUR PHONE IS, HUH? 120 00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:13,650 - MY PHONE? - YEAH. 121 00:07:13,824 --> 00:07:15,347 YEAH, YOU KNOW? YEAH, YOUR PHONE. 122 00:07:15,522 --> 00:07:16,871 AND IT'S VERY, VERY EXPENSIVE, ISN'T IT? 123 00:07:17,045 --> 00:07:18,176 - I GOT A CASE ON THERE, THOUGH. - LET ME TELL YOU. 124 00:07:18,350 --> 00:07:19,917 I GOT SOMETHING AMAZING. 125 00:07:20,091 --> 00:07:22,006 I INVENTED THIS. 126 00:07:22,180 --> 00:07:23,486 WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT? 127 00:07:23,660 --> 00:07:24,922 A PILLOW? 128 00:07:25,096 --> 00:07:26,968 IT'S A CASE FOR THE PHONE. 129 00:07:27,142 --> 00:07:29,057 HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, HUH? 130 00:07:29,231 --> 00:07:30,841 WATCH THIS. YOU WATCHING? 131 00:07:31,973 --> 00:07:34,105 AND IT DOESN'T BREAK, SEE? ISN'T THAT GREAT? 132 00:07:34,279 --> 00:07:35,977 OH, OH, OH. 133 00:07:36,151 --> 00:07:38,240 IT'S ONLY $800. 134 00:07:38,414 --> 00:07:40,547 $800? NO. NO? 135 00:07:40,721 --> 00:07:41,896 I'M GONNA GO. 136 00:07:42,070 --> 00:07:43,463 YOU'RE GONNA GO. 137 00:07:43,637 --> 00:07:44,725 OKAY, WELL --THANK YOU, THOUGH. 138 00:07:44,899 --> 00:07:46,161 WELL, LISTEN. YOU KNOW WHAT? 139 00:07:46,335 --> 00:07:48,468 I HOPE YOUR PHONE BREAKS IN A MILLION PIECES. 140 00:07:55,257 --> 00:07:58,390 Woman: EXCUSE ME, LADIES. 141 00:07:58,565 --> 00:08:00,131 ARE YOU FAMILIAR WITH THIS AREA? 142 00:08:00,305 --> 00:08:02,046 KIND OF. 143 00:08:02,220 --> 00:08:04,092 WELL, SOMEONE SAID THAT THERE'S A MOVIE THEATER NEARBY. 144 00:08:04,266 --> 00:08:05,659 - YEAH, NO. - NO? OH. 145 00:08:05,833 --> 00:08:07,138 I WOULDN'T KNOW. 146 00:08:07,312 --> 00:08:09,576 I'M LATE FOR MY OWN FILM RETROSPECTIVE. 147 00:08:09,750 --> 00:08:12,361 THEY'RE SHOWING SOME OF MY MOVIES FROM THE '70s. 148 00:08:12,535 --> 00:08:13,754 - OH, MY GOSH. - I KNOW. 149 00:08:13,928 --> 00:08:15,103 MAYBE YOU'VE HEARD OF ME. 150 00:08:15,277 --> 00:08:17,235 UH...MY NAME IS CANDIE ASS. 151 00:08:17,409 --> 00:08:18,759 NO. 152 00:08:18,933 --> 00:08:20,369 WITH AN "E". 153 00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:21,979 HEY, MAYBE I'LL SEE YOU AT A SCREENING! 154 00:08:22,153 --> 00:08:23,720 RIGHT? MAYBE. 155 00:08:31,859 --> 00:08:34,252 WHOA! 156 00:08:38,953 --> 00:08:42,565 ♪ LET'S GO CRAZY ♪ 157 00:08:42,739 --> 00:08:45,655 ♪ LET'S GO CRAZY ♪ 158 00:08:47,614 --> 00:08:49,659 ♪ COME ON, LET'S GO CRAZY, BABY ♪ 159 00:09:00,061 --> 00:09:02,193 Man: 160 00:09:02,367 --> 00:09:04,805 ♪ LET'S GO, LET'S GO ♪ 161 00:09:07,895 --> 00:09:10,550 MY DEAR, WOULD YOU DO ME THE EXTREME HONOR 162 00:09:10,724 --> 00:09:13,422 OF JOINING ME FOR A LOVELY CANDLELIT DINNER? 163 00:09:14,858 --> 00:09:16,425 WILL MADAME BE DINING WITH US, SIR? 164 00:09:16,599 --> 00:09:18,601 I THINK SO, LOUIS. 165 00:09:18,775 --> 00:09:19,994 SHALL I POUR? 166 00:09:20,168 --> 00:09:21,343 YES. 167 00:09:21,517 --> 00:09:23,650 OH, THIS IS A GREAT VINTAGE, MA'AM. 168 00:09:23,824 --> 00:09:26,000 JUST MAKE AN OLD MAN HAPPY, MY DEAR. 169 00:09:26,174 --> 00:09:28,437 - OH, YOU WOULD LOVE THIS. - I -- I... 170 00:09:30,395 --> 00:09:32,572 Man: A QUICK MOMENT. 171 00:09:32,746 --> 00:09:34,182 I WILL PUT YOU IN MY WILL. 172 00:09:38,752 --> 00:09:40,928 REALLY? 173 00:09:47,021 --> 00:09:51,068 MY FRIENDS ARE ALWAYS ASKING ME IF I'M TIRED OF BEING SINGLE. 174 00:09:51,242 --> 00:09:54,637 "DON'T YOU WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP?" THEY SAY. 175 00:09:54,811 --> 00:09:57,597 "DON'T YOU MISS OUT ON ALL THAT PASSION?" 176 00:09:59,729 --> 00:10:02,427 I TELL THEM THAT GETTING INTO A RELATIONSHIP FOR THE PASSION 177 00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:05,082 IS LIKE PAYING FOR A FIVE-STAR VACATION 178 00:10:05,256 --> 00:10:08,782 JUST TO GET THE FREE HOTEL SOAP. 179 00:10:13,264 --> 00:10:14,657 SIR, COULD YOU HELP ME OPEN THIS UP, PLEASE? 180 00:10:14,831 --> 00:10:17,051 THESE ARE MY BONER PILLS. 181 00:10:17,225 --> 00:10:18,966 I'M HAVING A PARTY WITH A LOT OF GIRLS AND STUFF, 182 00:10:19,140 --> 00:10:21,490 AND I NEED TO GET IT UP IN ABOUT AN HOUR. 183 00:10:21,664 --> 00:10:23,753 WOULD YOU LIKE TO COME TO THE PARTY? 184 00:10:23,927 --> 00:10:25,581 WELL, NO, NO, NO, NO. 185 00:10:25,755 --> 00:10:27,539 THEY'RE WONDERFUL GIRLS, ETHEL AND PEARL AND MARGARET, 186 00:10:27,714 --> 00:10:30,673 AND THEY'RE ABSOLUTELY ONE BETTER THAN ANOTHER. 187 00:10:30,847 --> 00:10:32,370 OH, HERE THEY ARE. HI, GIRLS. 188 00:10:32,544 --> 00:10:33,807 HOW YOU DOING? OH, DOING FINE. 189 00:10:33,981 --> 00:10:35,765 - ARE YOU READY FOR TONIGHT? - ARE YOU KIDDING? 190 00:10:35,939 --> 00:10:37,549 I'M LOCKED AND LOADED AND READY TO GO. 191 00:10:37,724 --> 00:10:38,768 SURE YOU DON'T WANT TO COME, HUH? 192 00:10:40,204 --> 00:10:42,642 IT'S PARTY TIME! YES, SIR. 193 00:10:53,696 --> 00:10:56,133 CAN I JUST ASK ONE QUESTION? 194 00:10:56,307 --> 00:10:57,439 WHAT'S UP? 195 00:10:57,613 --> 00:10:59,528 WELL, I-I'M GONNA ASK THIS LADY 196 00:10:59,702 --> 00:11:01,748 THAT I'VE BEEN SEEING TO MARRY ME. 197 00:11:01,922 --> 00:11:03,619 WELL, I WROTE A SPEECH, YOU KNOW? 198 00:11:03,793 --> 00:11:06,404 I JUST WANT TO HEAR IT READ OUT LOUD AND GET SOMEONE'S OPINION. 199 00:11:06,578 --> 00:11:07,928 SURE. READ IT. 200 00:11:08,102 --> 00:11:10,408 L-LET'S DO THE WHOLE THING, OKAY? OKAY. 201 00:11:10,582 --> 00:11:13,368 - WILL YOU HOLD THIS? - OKAY. 202 00:11:13,542 --> 00:11:15,936 DOROTHY, I LOVE YOU. 203 00:11:16,110 --> 00:11:19,940 I'M SORRY ABOUT THE AFFAIRS, THE ORGIES -- 204 00:11:20,114 --> 00:11:21,550 ORGIES, THOUGH? 205 00:11:21,724 --> 00:11:23,813 KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS, BRAH. 206 00:11:25,641 --> 00:11:29,427 WELL, UM, HOW CAN I FIX THIS? 207 00:11:29,601 --> 00:11:31,081 I WOULD LEAVE THE ORGIES OUT. 208 00:11:31,255 --> 00:11:33,214 JUST, LIKE, DON'T TALK ABOUT THE ORGIES. 209 00:11:33,388 --> 00:11:34,868 DON'T TALK ABOUT THE ORGIES? 210 00:11:35,042 --> 00:11:36,391 NO. DON'T TALK ABOUT THE ORGIES. 211 00:11:36,565 --> 00:11:37,653 YOU HAVE SUCH BEAUTIFUL BLUE EYES. 212 00:11:37,827 --> 00:11:39,350 THANK YOU. THEY'RE BLUE. 213 00:11:39,524 --> 00:11:41,918 SEE? SEE? YOU'RE A TROUBLEMAKER. DOROTHY'S GONNA SAY NO. 214 00:11:42,092 --> 00:11:43,790 KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS. 215 00:11:43,964 --> 00:11:46,749 BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARD. 216 00:11:50,144 --> 00:11:52,973 NO ONE DATES IN PERSON ANYMORE. 217 00:11:53,147 --> 00:11:56,716 IT'S ALL ABOUT GOING ONLINE. 218 00:11:56,890 --> 00:12:00,937 BUT THESE DATING APPS ARE JUST SO CONFUSING. 219 00:12:01,111 --> 00:12:03,505 SO, HOW DO I MAKE A PROFILE? 220 00:12:03,679 --> 00:12:07,901 YOU JUST UPLOAD YOUR PIC, SET YOUR PREFERENCES TO TALL, 221 00:12:08,075 --> 00:12:11,643 EXTREMELY GOOD-LOOKING, AND UNDER 25. 222 00:12:11,818 --> 00:12:13,254 AH. 223 00:12:13,428 --> 00:12:15,212 THAT WORKS FOR ME. 224 00:12:22,829 --> 00:12:24,178 SIR, WE'RE DOING A CENSUS REPORT. 225 00:12:24,352 --> 00:12:26,136 CAN I ASK YOU A COUPLE OF QUESTIONS, PLEASE? 226 00:12:26,310 --> 00:12:27,747 OKAY, JUST REAL QUICK. WHAT IS YOUR NAME? 227 00:12:27,921 --> 00:12:29,270 - CELINE. - CELINE. OKAY. 228 00:12:29,444 --> 00:12:31,402 - AND YOUR BIRTHPLACE? - AFRICA. 229 00:12:31,576 --> 00:12:34,014 - YOUR MOTHER'S MAIDEN NAME? - FATIMA. 230 00:12:34,188 --> 00:12:36,146 - HOW TALL IS SHE? - WHAT'S THIS ABOUT? 231 00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:38,061 - HOW TALL IS SHE? - I'M NOT SURE. 232 00:12:38,235 --> 00:12:39,497 - WHAT COLOR IS HER EYES? - BROWN. 233 00:12:39,671 --> 00:12:41,804 BROWN, OKAY. 234 00:12:41,978 --> 00:12:43,675 I KIND OF RECALL THAT. 235 00:12:43,850 --> 00:12:46,417 HAS YOU MOM EVER TRIED TO REVEAL A BIG SECRET BUT CAN'T 236 00:12:46,591 --> 00:12:49,116 THAT KIND OF LEAVES YOU WONDERING WHO YOU ARE? 237 00:12:49,290 --> 00:12:50,726 NO. 238 00:12:50,900 --> 00:12:52,119 WELL, YOU'RE GONNA BE REAL SURPRISED. 239 00:12:52,293 --> 00:12:53,381 I'M YOUR FATHER. 240 00:12:53,555 --> 00:12:55,165 YOU CRAZY SON OF A GUN. 241 00:12:55,339 --> 00:12:56,993 NO, YOU BETTER CALL YOUR MOM. 242 00:12:57,167 --> 00:12:58,560 AND JUST -- SHE'S GOT A LOT TO TELL YOU, GET IT OFF HER CHEST. 243 00:12:58,734 --> 00:13:00,127 YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? 244 00:13:00,301 --> 00:13:02,782 IF IT'S TRUE, THEN I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO THAT. 245 00:13:02,956 --> 00:13:04,827 OKAY, SEE YOU LATER. THANKS A LOT. 246 00:13:05,001 --> 00:13:07,221 THANK YOU. 247 00:13:07,395 --> 00:13:09,919 HA! 248 00:13:15,098 --> 00:13:16,404 EXCUSE ME. 249 00:13:16,578 --> 00:13:18,145 MY SON WROTE OUT MY TO-DO LIST FOR ME, 250 00:13:18,319 --> 00:13:19,624 AND I LEFT MY GLASSES AT HOME. 251 00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:21,104 COULD YOU READ IT TO ME, PLEASE? 252 00:13:21,278 --> 00:13:22,540 YEAH. 253 00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:27,328 I DID THAT. MM-HMM. I DID THAT. 254 00:13:28,895 --> 00:13:30,722 OOH. 255 00:13:30,897 --> 00:13:32,376 OH, MY GOD. 256 00:13:32,550 --> 00:13:33,987 ARE YOU AVAILABLE? 257 00:13:34,161 --> 00:13:36,554 NO, I'M ACTUALLY SUPPOSED TO BE PICKING UP SOMETHING 258 00:13:36,728 --> 00:13:37,991 FOR MY BOSS. 259 00:13:38,165 --> 00:13:39,731 OH. YOU AND YOUR BOSS, MAYBE? 260 00:13:42,343 --> 00:13:43,692 I MEAN, YOU'RE A REALLY CUTE GUY. 261 00:13:43,866 --> 00:13:45,868 MAYBE YOU'VE GOT A GIRLFRIEND, YOU KNOW? 262 00:13:46,042 --> 00:13:47,304 I DON'T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND. 263 00:13:47,478 --> 00:13:48,610 I MEAN, A THREESOME'S A THREESOME, 264 00:13:48,784 --> 00:13:49,829 IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. 265 00:13:50,003 --> 00:13:51,395 OH, MY GOD. 266 00:13:51,569 --> 00:13:52,832 I MEAN, TWO GIRLS. 267 00:13:53,006 --> 00:13:55,225 I MEAN, WOULD YOU BE DOWN WITH THAT? 268 00:13:55,399 --> 00:13:57,575 NO! I ACTUALLY HAVE TO GET GOING. 269 00:13:57,749 --> 00:14:00,143 BUT THAT YOU FOR GIVING ME THE OFFER. 270 00:14:00,317 --> 00:14:01,710 OKAY. THANK YOU. 271 00:14:12,982 --> 00:14:15,158 CAN YOU HELP ME FOR A SECOND? 272 00:14:15,332 --> 00:14:17,769 YEAH, THIS IS THE RIGHT THING. CAN YOU HOLD THIS FOR ME? 273 00:14:17,944 --> 00:14:20,381 JUST HOLD IT FOR ONE SECOND. 274 00:14:20,555 --> 00:14:22,774 YOU KNOW, I JUST GOT TO, LIKE...OH, YEAH, GREAT. 275 00:14:22,949 --> 00:14:24,254 OKAY, UM... 276 00:14:24,428 --> 00:14:25,821 I DON'T THINK YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO DO THAT. 277 00:14:25,995 --> 00:14:28,215 UM...IT'S OKAY BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, 278 00:14:28,389 --> 00:14:30,391 THIS IS REALLY GOOD THIS WAY. 279 00:14:30,565 --> 00:14:32,219 OH, MY GOD. OH, MY GOD. 280 00:14:32,393 --> 00:14:34,090 CAN YOU HOLD THIS FOR ME? 281 00:14:34,264 --> 00:14:37,528 THANK YOU. 282 00:14:49,714 --> 00:14:52,065 WONDERING IF YOU COULD HELP US WITH SOMETHING. 283 00:14:52,239 --> 00:14:53,457 WE NEED SOMEBODY IMPARTIAL. 284 00:14:53,631 --> 00:14:55,329 WE'VE BEEN ARGUING FOR AN HOUR. 285 00:14:55,503 --> 00:14:56,678 FLIP A COIN FOR US. 286 00:14:56,852 --> 00:14:58,549 WHATEVER IT SAYS, WE'LL DO. 287 00:15:01,117 --> 00:15:02,379 HEADS. OH, NO! 288 00:15:02,553 --> 00:15:04,033 I WON! NOW WE DON'T HAVE TO DO 289 00:15:04,207 --> 00:15:06,035 THAT BORING MISSIONARY POSITION ANYMORE. 290 00:15:06,209 --> 00:15:07,558 LET'S GO. COME ON. OH, BOY. 291 00:15:07,732 --> 00:15:09,212 HEY, YOU CAN KEEP THE QUARTER. 292 00:15:09,386 --> 00:15:11,562 NOW WE'RE GONNA HAVE -- WE CAN HAVE WATER SPORTS. 293 00:15:11,736 --> 00:15:12,999 WE CAN... 294 00:15:17,351 --> 00:15:19,744 SHH. MY LITTLE PROTéGé IS ON THE PHONE. 295 00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:21,921 NO, I DON'T WANT TO. 296 00:15:22,095 --> 00:15:23,705 YOU CAN'T MAKE ME! 297 00:15:23,879 --> 00:15:26,926 I ALWAYS LET HER DEAL WITH MY AGENT. 298 00:15:33,584 --> 00:15:34,977 - NICE DAY, ISN'T IT? - YES, IT IS. 299 00:15:35,151 --> 00:15:36,457 - HOW YOU DOING, MA'AM? - GOOD. 300 00:15:36,631 --> 00:15:37,806 HOW ARE YOU? GOOD. 301 00:15:37,980 --> 00:15:40,026 GOOD. THAT'S MY BOSS DOWN THERE. 302 00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,115 HE'S AN ACTOR -- VERY FAMOUS. 303 00:15:42,289 --> 00:15:43,377 - OH. - YEAH. 304 00:15:43,551 --> 00:15:45,335 WHAT HE LOVES IS ATTENTION. 305 00:15:45,509 --> 00:15:46,989 - OH, IS THAT RIGHT? - YEAH. 306 00:15:47,163 --> 00:15:48,643 I TRY TO FIND PEOPLE WHO AUTOGRAPH HIS PICTURE. 307 00:15:48,817 --> 00:15:50,210 OH, OKAY. 308 00:15:50,384 --> 00:15:51,733 HE'LL BE EVER SO GRATEFUL, 309 00:15:51,907 --> 00:15:53,865 AND HE'LL BE NICE TO ME FOR THE REST OF THE DAY. 310 00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:58,131 - OH. - OKAY. 311 00:15:58,305 --> 00:15:59,959 THANKS. YEAH. 312 00:16:00,133 --> 00:16:01,221 THANK YOU. 313 00:16:01,395 --> 00:16:02,831 HELLO, SIR. 314 00:16:03,005 --> 00:16:04,180 - GOOD MORNING. - MORNING. HOW ARE YOU? 315 00:16:04,354 --> 00:16:05,399 GOOD. YOURSELF? 316 00:16:05,573 --> 00:16:07,227 FINE. 317 00:16:07,401 --> 00:16:09,707 I WAS WONDERING IF I COULD GRAB A LITTLE SIGNATURE. 318 00:16:09,881 --> 00:16:11,318 OH. IT'S THAT PICTURE. 319 00:16:11,492 --> 00:16:13,624 WELL, THAT'S NOT TOO BAD. OH, OKAY. 320 00:16:13,798 --> 00:16:15,148 - MAY I BORROW THE PEN? - YES, YOU MAY. 321 00:16:15,322 --> 00:16:16,627 THANK YOU. WHAT IS YOUR NAME, SIR? 322 00:16:16,801 --> 00:16:18,847 ROLANDO. ROLANDO. 323 00:16:19,021 --> 00:16:20,936 YES, SIR. OKAY. 324 00:16:21,110 --> 00:16:23,112 I HOPE THAT MEETS YOUR NEEDS. 325 00:16:23,286 --> 00:16:24,940 - YEAH, IT WILL. - YOU GOT THE AUTOGRAPH. 326 00:16:25,114 --> 00:16:27,551 NOW GET THE AWAY FROM ME. THANK YOU. 327 00:16:27,725 --> 00:16:29,249 RIGHT ON. 328 00:16:40,260 --> 00:16:41,783 I GOT TO ASK YOU GUYS A QUESTION. 329 00:16:41,957 --> 00:16:43,567 - WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING? - SALES. 330 00:16:43,741 --> 00:16:46,222 SALES? THE REASON I ASK IS TODAY'S MY LAST DAY. 331 00:16:46,396 --> 00:16:49,051 I'VE BEEN GIVING PARKING TICKETS... 332 00:16:49,225 --> 00:16:51,140 UH-HUH...FOR 45 YEARS 333 00:16:51,314 --> 00:16:54,665 AND BREAKING PEOPLE'S HEARTS AND RUINING PEOPLE'S DAYS. 334 00:16:54,839 --> 00:16:58,408 I'M JUST GONNA GIVE YOU EACH ONE OF THESE HANDICAPPED THINGS. 335 00:16:58,582 --> 00:17:00,976 I DON'T HAVE ANY REASON -- GO AHEAD. 336 00:17:01,150 --> 00:17:03,544 JUST SO YOU GOT A FREE DAY OF PARKING. 337 00:17:03,718 --> 00:17:06,373 - OH. THANK YOU. - ALL RIGHT. AND DO ME A FAVOR. 338 00:17:06,547 --> 00:17:08,505 CAN YOU LIMP? JUST LIMP A LITTLE BIT. 339 00:17:08,679 --> 00:17:11,334 OKAY. ALL RIGHT. 340 00:17:11,508 --> 00:17:13,641 JUST...THAT'S RIGHT. 341 00:17:27,263 --> 00:17:28,569 OH, HANG ON. 342 00:17:55,683 --> 00:17:58,425 CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING? 343 00:17:58,599 --> 00:18:00,035 CAN YOU TAKE MY PICTURE? 344 00:18:00,209 --> 00:18:01,428 YEAH, SURE. OH, GOOD. 345 00:18:01,602 --> 00:18:03,952 I'M CELEBRATING MY 99th. 346 00:18:04,126 --> 00:18:06,085 BIRTHDAY? NO. 347 00:18:06,259 --> 00:18:07,651 MY 99th MAN. 348 00:18:07,825 --> 00:18:09,000 MAN? REALLY? 349 00:18:09,175 --> 00:18:10,698 REALLY. OH, GOD. 350 00:18:10,872 --> 00:18:13,744 YOU WANT TO BE MY MR. CENTURY? MY 100th GUY? 351 00:18:13,918 --> 00:18:17,270 UM...I DON'T KNOW. 352 00:18:17,444 --> 00:18:19,054 WHAT DO I GET FOR IT? 353 00:18:19,228 --> 00:18:21,665 YOU GET ME. BUT YOU KNOW? 354 00:18:21,839 --> 00:18:24,190 YOU'RE NOT HALF ENOUGH MAN FOR ME. 355 00:18:24,364 --> 00:18:27,367 - I'M NOT HALF ENOUGH? - NO. NO. 356 00:18:35,766 --> 00:18:37,333 EXCUSE ME. 357 00:18:37,507 --> 00:18:39,727 I'M GOING ON MY FIRST DATE SINCE I GOT DIVORCED. 358 00:18:39,901 --> 00:18:42,512 IF YOU COULD JUST SPRAY MY BACK WITH THIS BODY SPRAY. 359 00:18:42,686 --> 00:18:44,384 I WANT TO SMELL GOOD FOR MY FIRST DATE. 360 00:18:44,558 --> 00:18:46,516 YEAH. 361 00:18:46,690 --> 00:18:48,518 I CAN'T REACH -- YEAH, RIGHT. 362 00:18:48,692 --> 00:18:49,911 OOH, THAT'S GOOD. 363 00:18:50,085 --> 00:18:51,608 THAT'S GOOD. 364 00:18:51,782 --> 00:18:54,089 YEAH, I'M TELLING YOU. YEAH, RIGHT, RIGHT. 365 00:18:54,263 --> 00:18:55,525 SPRAY THE ARMS. YEAH, RIGHT. 366 00:18:57,484 --> 00:18:59,094 YOU SPRAYED TOO MUCH ON ME. 367 00:18:59,268 --> 00:19:00,356 I'M SORRY. 368 00:19:00,530 --> 00:19:01,749 I GOT TO CHANGE MY SHIRT. 369 00:19:01,923 --> 00:19:03,446 NOW I SMELL LIKE A NEW ORLEANS PIMP. 370 00:19:03,620 --> 00:19:06,014 GOD. 371 00:19:13,543 --> 00:19:15,154 I JUST FOUND THIS SHOE. 372 00:19:15,328 --> 00:19:16,807 MM-HMM. 373 00:19:16,981 --> 00:19:19,070 YOU KNOW, AND I'M KIND OF A ROMANTIC KIND OF GUY. 374 00:19:19,245 --> 00:19:22,248 AND I FEEL THAT THE NEXT PERSON 375 00:19:22,422 --> 00:19:26,426 THAT CAN FIT IN THIS SHOE COULD BE MY WIFE. 376 00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,558 WOULD YOU MIND TRYING IT ON? YOU NEVER KNOW. 377 00:19:30,647 --> 00:19:32,127 HELP ME. JUST A MOMENT. 378 00:19:32,301 --> 00:19:34,129 OKAY. HOLD ON. OKAY. HERE WE GO. 379 00:19:34,303 --> 00:19:35,826 LET'S HOPE. 380 00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:37,915 IF IT FITS, YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW IT'S GONNA HAPPEN. 381 00:19:38,089 --> 00:19:40,614 OH, MY. OH, JUST PUSH. YEAH. 382 00:19:40,788 --> 00:19:41,876 IT FITS. OOH. 383 00:19:42,050 --> 00:19:44,183 - OH, DOES IT HURT? - NO, IT DON'T. 384 00:19:44,357 --> 00:19:46,446 I'M GONNA GO GET A MARRIAGE LICENSE. 385 00:19:46,620 --> 00:19:49,057 YOU JUST WAIT HERE. OH! I'M SO HAPPY. 386 00:19:49,231 --> 00:19:50,667 I CAN'T STAND IT. 387 00:19:55,106 --> 00:19:57,457 WELL, EVERYONE, DIG IN. 388 00:19:57,631 --> 00:19:58,849 MM. 389 00:19:59,023 --> 00:20:01,548 White: THEY SAY THE BEST WAY TO AGE 390 00:20:01,722 --> 00:20:04,072 IS TO GROW OLD GRACEFULLY. 391 00:20:04,246 --> 00:20:09,643 BUT IT'S A HECK OF A LOT MORE FUN TO GROW OLD DISGRACEFULLY. 392 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:15,736 NO. 393 00:20:26,573 --> 00:20:28,270 OOH, THAT'S GOOD. 394 00:20:36,583 --> 00:20:38,976 - OH, MY GOD. - Woman: I MEAN, TWO GIRLS. 27553

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