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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:12,081 --> 00:00:13,289 IT'S OUR ANNIVERSARY. 2 00:00:13,358 --> 00:00:14,290 OH. 3 00:00:14,359 --> 00:00:15,291 REALLY? 4 00:00:15,360 --> 00:00:16,361 40 YEARS. 5 00:00:16,430 --> 00:00:17,741 TODAY? 6 00:00:17,810 --> 00:00:19,191 YEAH. 7 00:00:19,260 --> 00:00:21,193 YOU GUYS LOOK LIKE A COUPLE. 8 00:00:21,262 --> 00:00:23,126 WE'RE GETTING THERE. 9 00:00:23,195 --> 00:00:25,197 - HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN TOGETHER? - TWO WEEKS. 10 00:00:25,266 --> 00:00:26,578 TWO WEEKS? YEAH. 11 00:00:26,647 --> 00:00:29,891 OH, THE SLOBBERING IS GOOD THE FIRST TWO WEEKS. 12 00:00:31,376 --> 00:00:32,308 WE TRY OUR BEST. 13 00:00:32,377 --> 00:00:34,068 THAT'S GOOD. THAT'S GOOD. 14 00:00:34,137 --> 00:00:36,001 YOU WANT TO KNOW HOW TO... 15 00:00:36,070 --> 00:00:39,177 MAKE A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP? 16 00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:49,601 SO, YOU LISTEN TO HIM. 17 00:00:51,430 --> 00:00:53,191 HAVE A NICE DAY. 18 00:00:59,197 --> 00:01:00,370 TELL ME. 19 00:01:15,834 --> 00:01:17,249 HEY! 20 00:01:19,148 --> 00:01:20,287 TAKE MY PICTURE! 21 00:01:25,533 --> 00:01:26,776 OH, MY GOD! 22 00:01:29,054 --> 00:01:30,159 HIT ME! 23 00:01:32,057 --> 00:01:33,231 COME BACK HERE! 24 00:01:35,336 --> 00:01:36,510 SAY "BIG BOOBS." 25 00:01:41,756 --> 00:01:44,345 AAAAAH! 26 00:01:56,426 --> 00:01:58,670 HELLO. I'M BETTY WHITE. 27 00:01:58,739 --> 00:02:01,259 WELCOME TO "OFF THEIR ROCKERS," 28 00:02:01,328 --> 00:02:04,503 THE SHOW WHERE I SEND OUT MY POSSE, 29 00:02:04,572 --> 00:02:08,714 WE HIDE SOME CAMERAS, AND THEN EXPOSE THE NEW GENERATION 30 00:02:08,783 --> 00:02:11,269 TO SOME OF OUR GENERATION'S MISCHIEF. 31 00:02:11,338 --> 00:02:13,754 GET READY FOR SOME SURPRISES. 32 00:02:13,823 --> 00:02:17,930 SURE, WE'RE OLDER, BUT WE'RE A LOT SMARTER THAN YOU THINK. 33 00:02:19,553 --> 00:02:21,796 MMM. 34 00:02:21,865 --> 00:02:24,903 NOW, SOMETHING SEEMS TO BE MISSING. 35 00:02:24,972 --> 00:02:27,181 WHERE'S THAT SECRET INGREDIENT? 36 00:02:27,250 --> 00:02:28,493 AH. 37 00:02:28,562 --> 00:02:29,942 MM. 38 00:02:38,537 --> 00:02:42,507 OHH, LOOKS LIKE WE'RE OUT OF SECRET INGREDIENT. 39 00:02:42,576 --> 00:02:44,474 REFILL. 40 00:02:53,103 --> 00:02:56,762 YOU HAVEN'T SEEN A REALLY CUTE YOUNG GUY WALKING AROUND, 41 00:02:56,831 --> 00:02:57,936 LOOKING FOR SOMEBODY? 42 00:02:58,005 --> 00:02:59,558 I HAVEN'T. 43 00:02:59,627 --> 00:03:01,422 I HAVEN'T REALLY... 44 00:03:01,491 --> 00:03:03,838 YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HE'S WEARING, WHAT COLOR HAIR? 45 00:03:03,907 --> 00:03:05,944 I-I THINK HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE WEARING BLUE. 46 00:03:06,013 --> 00:03:08,222 I ORDERED THIS GUY ONLINE. 47 00:03:08,291 --> 00:03:10,535 OH! 48 00:03:10,604 --> 00:03:12,122 THESE ARE THE BLEACHERS, AREN'T THEY? 49 00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:14,608 YEAH. RIGHT? YEAH, YEAH. I THINK SO. 50 00:03:14,677 --> 00:03:16,126 WELL, THAT'S WHERE I SAID I'D BE, 51 00:03:16,196 --> 00:03:17,680 AND I'VE WAITED A LONG TIME, SO... 52 00:03:17,749 --> 00:03:19,060 EXCUSE ME. ARE YOU ANN? 53 00:03:19,129 --> 00:03:21,270 - I AM NOT ANN. - NO? 54 00:03:21,339 --> 00:03:23,099 I'M ANN, ACTUALLY. 55 00:03:23,168 --> 00:03:24,549 OH, GREAT. WELL, I'M THE GUY YOU ORDERED. 56 00:03:24,618 --> 00:03:26,240 OH. ALL RIGHT. 57 00:03:26,309 --> 00:03:27,276 - YEAH. HOW YOU DOING? - HELLO. 58 00:03:27,345 --> 00:03:29,347 - VERY GOOD. - YEAH? 59 00:03:29,416 --> 00:03:30,589 OKAY. 60 00:03:30,658 --> 00:03:32,453 SO, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO TODAY? 61 00:03:32,522 --> 00:03:34,559 OH, WELL, I HAVE A FEW THINGS IN MIND. 62 00:03:37,424 --> 00:03:38,908 WHAT?! 63 00:04:05,900 --> 00:04:07,039 EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME. 64 00:04:07,108 --> 00:04:08,317 ARE YOU OKAY? 65 00:04:08,386 --> 00:04:11,216 WELL, THERE'S A GUY I-I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO. 66 00:04:11,285 --> 00:04:13,011 OH, I UNDERSTAND THAT. 67 00:04:13,080 --> 00:04:15,013 CAN YOU PRETEND THAT WE'RE TALKING TO EACH OTHER? 68 00:04:15,082 --> 00:04:16,773 - YES. - THAT WE'RE LIKE FRIENDS OR SOMETHING? 69 00:04:16,842 --> 00:04:18,223 - YES. - WE'RE TALKING TO EACH OTHER? 70 00:04:18,292 --> 00:04:20,294 - Man: HEY. - SO, WE SHOULD GET COFFEE, LIKE, FRIDAY. 71 00:04:20,363 --> 00:04:21,330 - HEY. - YOU WANT TO GET A CUP? 72 00:04:21,399 --> 00:04:22,331 YEAH. HUH? 73 00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:23,573 WHAT ARE YOU DUCKING ME FOR? 74 00:04:23,642 --> 00:04:25,230 I'M NOT DUCKING YOU. WHAT DO YOU MEAN, DUCKING YOU? 75 00:04:25,299 --> 00:04:27,163 I'M TALKING -- I'M TALKING TO A FRIEND HERE. 76 00:04:27,232 --> 00:04:28,509 THAT'S YOUR FRIEND? 77 00:04:28,578 --> 00:04:31,271 I KNOW WHERE YOU ARE, SO DON'T GIVE ME NO CRAP. 78 00:04:31,340 --> 00:04:34,204 I WANT THE MONEY TONIGHT. 79 00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:36,137 I'LL BE BACK HERE AT 6:00. 80 00:04:36,206 --> 00:04:37,415 HE'LL GET IT, BRO. IT'S ALL GOOD. 81 00:04:37,484 --> 00:04:38,968 - HAVE THE MONEY. IT'S GOOD, HUH? - YEAH. 82 00:04:39,037 --> 00:04:40,866 - YOU GUARANTEE IT? - WE'RE JUST GONNA TAKE HIM WITH US. 83 00:04:40,935 --> 00:04:42,040 THAT MEANS I COME AND SEE YOU IF -- 84 00:04:42,109 --> 00:04:43,938 FINE.6:00, OKAY? 85 00:04:44,007 --> 00:04:45,630 OKAY. LADY SAYS SHE GUARANTEES IT. 86 00:04:45,699 --> 00:04:47,459 OKAY. SHE JUST SAVED YOUR ASS. 87 00:04:47,528 --> 00:04:48,805 - OKAY. - HE'S A GOOD FRIEND OF OURS. 88 00:04:48,874 --> 00:04:50,048 IT'S ALL GOOD. OKAY. 89 00:04:50,117 --> 00:04:51,221 YOU'RE GONNA GUARANTEE IT, TOO, HUH? 90 00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:52,222 IT'S TOTALLY FINE. 91 00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:54,708 HEY, LISTEN, I FOUND HIM. 92 00:04:54,777 --> 00:04:57,020 6:00, WE'LL BE BACK. 93 00:04:57,089 --> 00:04:58,746 GOOD LUCK. 94 00:04:58,815 --> 00:05:01,024 - YOU'RE GONNA NEED IT. - IT'LL BE OKAY. 95 00:05:01,093 --> 00:05:02,854 SO, YOU GOT SOME MONEY ON YOU? 96 00:05:02,923 --> 00:05:03,958 HOW MUCH MONEY? 97 00:05:04,027 --> 00:05:05,960 50 LARGE. 98 00:05:06,029 --> 00:05:07,859 OH, YEAH, I HAVE THAT ON ME. 99 00:05:07,928 --> 00:05:10,931 YEAH? WELL, I MEAN, CAN YOU GET IT BY 6:00? 100 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:12,139 I DON'T THINK SO. 101 00:05:12,208 --> 00:05:13,934 DO YOU HAVE A BANK HERE IN HERMOSA BEACH? 102 00:05:14,003 --> 00:05:15,832 THAT WOULD MAKE MY ACCOUNT NEGATIVE. 103 00:05:15,901 --> 00:05:17,938 WELL, HOW MUCH CAN YOU SCRAPE UP? 104 00:05:18,007 --> 00:05:20,112 OH, MY GOSH. 105 00:05:20,181 --> 00:05:22,114 WHAT DID YOU DO? WHY DO YOU OWE HIM? 106 00:05:22,183 --> 00:05:24,116 WELL, YOU KNOW, IT'S ONE OF THOSE THINGS. 107 00:05:24,185 --> 00:05:26,878 YOU KNOW, YOUR -- YOUR HORSES DON'T COME IN ALL THE TIME. 108 00:05:26,947 --> 00:05:28,604 WELL, I'M SORRY I GOT YOU INVOLVED IN THIS. 109 00:05:28,673 --> 00:05:30,571 - I REALLY AM. - IT'S OKAY. 110 00:05:30,640 --> 00:05:33,125 YOU KNOW, THOSE ARE NICE KNEES. I HOPE THEY DON'T GET DAMAGED. 111 00:05:46,276 --> 00:05:50,004 SO, EXACTLY WHAT IS THIS KRAV MAGA? 112 00:05:50,073 --> 00:05:53,629 BETTY, KRAV MAGA IS AN ISRAELI DEFENSIVE MARTIAL ART 113 00:05:53,698 --> 00:05:56,632 THAT INVOLVES ELEMENTS OF BOTH BOXING AND WRESTLING. 114 00:05:56,701 --> 00:05:59,876 IF SOMEBODY BIG, LIKE MYSELF, WERE TO COME AFTER YOU, 115 00:05:59,945 --> 00:06:02,189 I CAN TEACH YOU TO NEUTRALIZE THE THREAT 116 00:06:02,258 --> 00:06:04,018 USING DELICATE PRESSURE POINTS. 117 00:06:04,087 --> 00:06:06,573 DELICATE PRESSURE POINTS... 118 00:06:06,642 --> 00:06:07,850 YOU MEAN LIKE THIS? 119 00:06:10,473 --> 00:06:12,786 I CALL THAT "KRAV GRANDMA." 120 00:06:24,038 --> 00:06:27,041 SIR, THIS IS A NO-CELLPHONE ZONE. 121 00:06:27,110 --> 00:06:28,422 OKAY. 122 00:06:28,491 --> 00:06:31,011 THIS IS A NO-CELLPHONE ZONE. YOU'RE ON THE CELLPHONE. 123 00:06:31,080 --> 00:06:32,219 OKAY. 124 00:06:32,288 --> 00:06:34,221 DON'T YOU SEE THE SIGNS? NO. 125 00:06:34,290 --> 00:06:35,705 OKAY. OKAY. 126 00:06:35,774 --> 00:06:38,052 I'M GONNA HAVE TO CONFISCATE YOUR PHONE. 127 00:06:38,121 --> 00:06:39,053 ARE YOU SERIOUS? 128 00:06:39,122 --> 00:06:41,055 I'M SERIOUS. 129 00:06:41,124 --> 00:06:42,781 THIS IS A GREEN CITY, OKAY? 130 00:06:42,850 --> 00:06:45,197 OKAY. CAN I JUST HAVE A WARNING OR SOMETHING? 131 00:06:45,266 --> 00:06:47,510 I DIDN'T KNOW, MAN. IT'S MY FIRST TIME HERE. 132 00:06:47,579 --> 00:06:49,236 REQUESTING BACKUP. 133 00:06:49,305 --> 00:06:52,377 I HAVE A HOSTILE CELLPHONE USER. 134 00:06:52,446 --> 00:06:53,378 WOMAN: Backup on the way. 135 00:06:53,447 --> 00:06:55,104 LAST CHANCE. ALL RIGHT. 136 00:06:55,173 --> 00:06:56,346 OKAY. 137 00:06:56,416 --> 00:06:59,177 JUST STAY RIGHT HERE. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK, OKAY? 138 00:06:59,246 --> 00:07:00,350 THAT DOESN'T WORK FOR ME. 139 00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:01,766 YOU CAN'T JUST TAKE MY PHONE AWAY FROM ME 140 00:07:01,835 --> 00:07:03,146 AND THEN SAY YOU'RE GONNA COME BACK. 141 00:07:03,215 --> 00:07:05,286 YOU CAN GET THE PHONE. 142 00:07:05,355 --> 00:07:06,633 I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT OFF OF YOU. 143 00:07:06,702 --> 00:07:07,875 REQUESTING BACKUP. 144 00:07:07,944 --> 00:07:09,636 I'M NOT TRYING TO HARASS YOU. 145 00:07:09,705 --> 00:07:12,293 I HAVE A VERY HOSTILE CELLPHONE USER. 146 00:07:12,362 --> 00:07:13,812 Copy that. E.T.A. -- 2 minutes. 147 00:07:13,881 --> 00:07:14,813 LOOK AT THIS GUY, MAN. 148 00:07:14,882 --> 00:07:16,366 HE'S USING HIS CELLPHONE RIGHT THERE. 149 00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:17,851 HEY, I -- WHAT AM I, AN OCTOPUS? 150 00:07:17,920 --> 00:07:19,611 GIVE ME MY CELLPHONE BACK, DUDE. 151 00:07:19,680 --> 00:07:21,302 HEY, I CAN'T BE EVERYWHERE AT ONCE. 152 00:07:21,371 --> 00:07:23,650 YOU'RE FULL OF GIVE ME MY PHONE BACK. 153 00:07:23,719 --> 00:07:25,168 ALL RIGHT. GIVE ME MY PHONE. 154 00:07:25,237 --> 00:07:26,342 OKAY. 155 00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:30,829 COULD HAVE GOTTEN IT FROM IMPOUND. 156 00:07:33,142 --> 00:07:34,833 THE CITY AMBASSADOR. 157 00:07:44,394 --> 00:07:46,569 BEING IN SHOW BUSINESS HAS ITS PERKS. 158 00:07:46,638 --> 00:07:49,745 MY FAVORITE IS HAVING A TOP-NOTCH TEAM 159 00:07:49,814 --> 00:07:52,644 TO HELP ME GET READY EVERY DAY. 160 00:07:58,236 --> 00:08:01,481 OH. THERE. NOW I'M READY TO FACE THE WORLD. 161 00:08:01,550 --> 00:08:04,449 NOT SO FAST, MS. WHITE. 162 00:08:04,518 --> 00:08:05,761 OH, NO! 163 00:08:05,830 --> 00:08:08,626 I'M DOWN A WHOLE QUART. 164 00:08:08,695 --> 00:08:10,144 OH. 165 00:08:10,213 --> 00:08:12,699 OKAY, DO WHAT YOU GOT TO DO. 166 00:08:12,768 --> 00:08:14,666 LET'S GET HER UP ON THE LIFT, FELLAS. 167 00:08:14,735 --> 00:08:17,427 COME ON. LET'S GO. COME ON. HUSTLE! 168 00:08:24,365 --> 00:08:26,678 COOL LEMONADE! LEMONADE! 169 00:08:26,747 --> 00:08:29,647 YOO-HOO! LEMONADE! 170 00:08:29,716 --> 00:08:31,545 ICE-COLD LEMONADE. 171 00:08:31,614 --> 00:08:32,753 WE'LL GET SOME. 172 00:08:32,822 --> 00:08:34,444 - THIS IS CUTE. - OH, GOOD. 173 00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:35,445 THERE'S ONE. 174 00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:36,550 DO YOU HAVE CHANGE FOR A $10? 175 00:08:36,619 --> 00:08:37,655 OH, NO. 176 00:08:37,724 --> 00:08:38,759 I HAVE A DOLLAR. HERE. 177 00:08:38,828 --> 00:08:40,174 OH, NO. 178 00:08:40,243 --> 00:08:45,697 IT'S GOING TO BE $1.50 EACH. THAT'S $1, $2 -- $3. 179 00:08:45,766 --> 00:08:47,285 I THOUGHT IT WAS 50 CENTS. 180 00:08:47,354 --> 00:08:48,976 NO, NO. YOU KIDS CAN'T READ. 181 00:08:49,045 --> 00:08:51,496 YOU KNOW, YOU KIDS -- YOU JUST CAN'T READ. 182 00:08:51,565 --> 00:08:54,085 THAT SIGN SAYS "$1.50 EACH." 183 00:08:54,154 --> 00:08:55,258 DO YOU WANT IT, 184 00:08:55,327 --> 00:08:56,397 OR YOU DON'T WANT IT? 185 00:08:56,466 --> 00:08:58,123 UH, IT SAID "50 CENTS," SO... 186 00:08:58,192 --> 00:08:59,987 OH, I'M SORRY. 187 00:09:00,056 --> 00:09:01,023 SO, YES OR NO? 188 00:09:01,092 --> 00:09:02,334 NO, THANK YOU. 189 00:09:02,403 --> 00:09:03,888 OH, YOU'RE A CHEAPSKATE. OH. 190 00:09:03,957 --> 00:09:06,028 BYE-BYE. 191 00:09:07,443 --> 00:09:09,859 STICK IT IN YOUR EAR. 192 00:09:26,807 --> 00:09:29,810 I'M SO HUNGRY. I HAVEN'T EATEN SINCE BREAKFAST. 193 00:09:29,879 --> 00:09:31,881 THAT'S A BAD CHOICE. I WOULD DEFINITELY... 194 00:09:31,950 --> 00:09:34,781 THEY DON'T FEED YOU ON THE TRAINS ANYMORE, YOU KNOW? 195 00:09:34,850 --> 00:09:36,645 YEAH, YOU GOT TO PAY FOR IT. 196 00:09:41,201 --> 00:09:42,133 HEY! 197 00:09:42,202 --> 00:09:43,410 HEY, YOU! 198 00:09:44,376 --> 00:09:45,412 HEY! 199 00:09:45,481 --> 00:09:46,758 MISTER! 200 00:10:30,112 --> 00:10:32,217 EXCUSE ME. 201 00:10:32,286 --> 00:10:35,082 DO YOU REALIZE HOW FAST YOU'RE MOVING? 202 00:10:35,151 --> 00:10:38,430 THERE'S A PEDESTRIAN SPEED LIMIT OF 5 MILES AN HOUR. 203 00:10:38,499 --> 00:10:39,639 OH, REALLY? 204 00:10:39,708 --> 00:10:41,261 AND YOU WERE MOVING FASTER THAN THAT. 205 00:10:41,330 --> 00:10:44,229 SO WHAT I'M GONNA ASK YOU TO DO -- I COULD CITE YOU, 206 00:10:44,298 --> 00:10:47,198 BUT I'M GONNA ASK YOU TO STEP BACK HERE TO THIS LINE 207 00:10:47,267 --> 00:10:49,614 AND SHOW ME THAT YOU CAN WALK AT A RATE 208 00:10:49,683 --> 00:10:51,754 LESS THAN 5 MILES AN HOUR. 209 00:10:53,066 --> 00:10:54,723 WELL, IT'S -- THERE ARE SIGNS. 210 00:10:54,792 --> 00:10:55,827 THERE ARE SIGNS. 211 00:10:55,896 --> 00:10:57,277 THEY'RE AT EACH ENTRANCE. 212 00:10:57,346 --> 00:10:58,347 OKAY? 213 00:10:58,416 --> 00:11:00,349 NOW LET'S TRY IT. OKAY. 214 00:11:01,902 --> 00:11:03,283 OH, OH. ONCE MORE. ONCE MORE. 215 00:11:03,352 --> 00:11:04,594 I DIDN'T GET A GOOD READING. 216 00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:06,389 ONCE MORE. 217 00:11:08,840 --> 00:11:10,221 THIS IS NOT FUNNY. 218 00:11:10,290 --> 00:11:12,361 OKAY, I KNOW. OKAY? 219 00:11:12,430 --> 00:11:13,396 ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO. 220 00:11:15,433 --> 00:11:16,814 ALL RIGHT. 221 00:11:16,883 --> 00:11:18,367 ALL RIGHT. 222 00:11:18,436 --> 00:11:20,852 ALL RIGHT. 223 00:11:32,553 --> 00:11:34,417 Female voice: TURN LEFT. 224 00:11:36,765 --> 00:11:39,181 TURN RIGHT AHEAD. 225 00:11:42,425 --> 00:11:44,980 YOU HAVE ARRIVED AT YOUR DESTINATION. 226 00:11:49,225 --> 00:11:50,744 HELLO. 227 00:11:50,813 --> 00:11:53,091 EXCUSE ME. IS ANYONE THERE? 228 00:11:53,160 --> 00:11:54,127 YES? 229 00:11:54,196 --> 00:11:56,750 I COULD USE SOME DIRECTIONS. 230 00:11:56,819 --> 00:11:58,545 OKAY. I DON'T -- I DON'T KNOW IT VERY WELL. 231 00:11:58,614 --> 00:12:00,685 I JUST GOT IN LAST NIGHT, BUT I COULD HELP YOU, MAYBE. 232 00:12:00,754 --> 00:12:03,412 WELL, WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR IS THE PIER. 233 00:12:03,481 --> 00:12:04,551 THE PIER -- OUT THIS WAY. 234 00:12:04,620 --> 00:12:06,035 DO YOU WANT ME TO WALK YOU THERE? 235 00:12:06,104 --> 00:12:08,106 NO, NO. JUST POINT ME IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION. 236 00:12:08,175 --> 00:12:09,314 JUST -- IS IT THIS WAY? 237 00:12:09,383 --> 00:12:11,523 - DIRECTLY RIGHT THERE. - GREAT. 238 00:12:11,592 --> 00:12:12,973 - THANK YOU. - YOU'RE WELCOME. 239 00:12:13,042 --> 00:12:16,494 YEAH. THE GPS GOT ME THIS FAR, BUT I COULDN'T FIND THE PIER. 240 00:12:16,563 --> 00:12:18,427 OKAY. YEAH. 241 00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,769 OH. 242 00:12:49,838 --> 00:12:52,357 DON'T TELL ANYBODY, BUT I JUST FARTED. 243 00:12:52,426 --> 00:12:53,703 IT -- IT'LL BE OUR SECRET. 244 00:13:05,474 --> 00:13:08,477 I DON'T BELIEVE IT. GREG, HOW YOU BEEN? HOW YOU DOING? 245 00:13:08,546 --> 00:13:11,066 GEEZ, IT'S BEEN ABOUT 20 YEARS SINCE I SEEN YOU. 246 00:13:11,135 --> 00:13:13,447 HOLY MOLY, MAN! 247 00:13:13,516 --> 00:13:15,691 GOD, IT'S BEEN GREAT TO SEE YOU. 248 00:13:15,760 --> 00:13:16,934 HOW'S THE -- HOW YOU BEEN? 249 00:13:17,003 --> 00:13:19,005 ALL RIGHT. EVERYTHING IS GOING GOOD? 250 00:13:19,074 --> 00:13:20,316 YES. YEAH, ME TOO. 251 00:13:20,385 --> 00:13:21,386 WOW. 252 00:13:21,455 --> 00:13:23,181 GIVE ME ANOTHER HUG. YOU'RE A NICE GUY. 253 00:13:23,250 --> 00:13:24,734 OH. YEAH. 254 00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:27,220 HOW'S YOUR WIFE? HOW'S YOUR -- HOW'S YOUR FAMILY? 255 00:13:27,289 --> 00:13:28,980 HOW'S YOUR FAMILY, GREG? COME ON. TELL ME. 256 00:13:29,049 --> 00:13:30,188 HOW'S YOUR FAMILY? 257 00:13:30,257 --> 00:13:31,672 I-I'M OKAY. 258 00:13:31,741 --> 00:13:33,260 LAST TIME I SAW YOU WAS NEW YORK. 259 00:13:33,329 --> 00:13:35,815 YEAH. BUT, NO, I THINK THAT YOU ARE CONFUSED. 260 00:13:35,884 --> 00:13:37,195 - YOU THINK I'M CONFUSED? - YEAH. 261 00:13:37,264 --> 00:13:38,438 WHY? Y-YOU'RE NOT GREG? 262 00:13:38,507 --> 00:13:39,784 NO. NO? 263 00:13:39,853 --> 00:13:40,785 DO I LOOK LIKE GREG? 264 00:13:40,854 --> 00:13:42,131 WAIT A SECOND. WAIT A SECOND. 265 00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:43,270 I'M NOT GREG. 266 00:13:44,306 --> 00:13:47,136 - OH. I'M S-- YOU'RE NOT GREG. - NO. 267 00:13:47,205 --> 00:13:49,069 WELL, WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU HUGGING ME FOR? 268 00:13:49,138 --> 00:13:50,450 GEE, YOU HUG STRANGERS? 269 00:13:50,519 --> 00:13:52,210 ALL RIGHT. BYE, GREG. 270 00:14:03,428 --> 00:14:05,534 THE YOUNG UP-AND-COMING ACTRESSES 271 00:14:05,603 --> 00:14:08,675 ARE ALWAYS ASKING ME HOW TO MAKE IT IN THIS BUSINESS. 272 00:14:08,744 --> 00:14:11,057 I TELL THEM MY THREE "NEVERS" -- 273 00:14:11,126 --> 00:14:15,889 NEVER FORGET YOUR LINES, NEVER BE LATE FOR AN AUDITION, 274 00:14:15,958 --> 00:14:19,582 AND NEVER, EVER SLEEP WITH THE DIRECTOR. 275 00:14:19,651 --> 00:14:22,931 AFTER ALL, IT'S THE PRODUCERS WHO HAVE ALL THE REAL POWER. 276 00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:37,635 TWO BROTHERS ARE SITTING AT THE CAFé, TAKING A RESPITE, 277 00:14:37,704 --> 00:14:39,671 BUT IT IS ONLY AN ILLUSION. 278 00:14:39,740 --> 00:14:41,984 IN THEATERS THIS FALL, 279 00:14:42,053 --> 00:14:45,712 YOU'LL LOVE TO SEE "TWO BROTHERS AT THE CAFé," 280 00:14:45,781 --> 00:14:49,198 STARRING THE BROTHER IN THE PLAID SHIRT 281 00:14:49,267 --> 00:14:52,615 AND CO-STARRING THE BROTHER IN WHITE. 282 00:14:52,684 --> 00:14:53,616 DON'T MISS IT. 283 00:14:53,685 --> 00:14:55,239 "ONE BROTHER AT THE CAFé." 284 00:14:55,308 --> 00:14:57,241 "ONE BROTHER AT THE CAFé" THIS FALL. 285 00:14:57,310 --> 00:14:58,759 OTHER BROTHER'S GONE. 286 00:14:58,828 --> 00:15:01,072 OTHER BROTHER'S GONE. 287 00:15:01,141 --> 00:15:02,729 IT'S A WONDERFUL STORY FOR ALL THE FAMILY. 288 00:15:02,798 --> 00:15:04,662 DON'T MISS IT THIS FALL -- 289 00:15:04,731 --> 00:15:07,458 "THE BROTHER AT THE CAFé." 290 00:15:07,527 --> 00:15:08,700 THANK YOU, BROTHER. 291 00:15:23,784 --> 00:15:26,339 EXCUSE ME. E-EXCUSE ME. 292 00:15:26,408 --> 00:15:28,651 IS THIS YOUR BIKE? 293 00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:30,343 ARE YOU SURE? 294 00:15:30,412 --> 00:15:31,792 GO! 295 00:15:53,711 --> 00:15:55,092 OH! 296 00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:58,095 OH! 297 00:15:59,096 --> 00:16:02,202 MA'AM! CAN YOU -- CAN YOU HELP ME? COME HERE! 298 00:16:02,271 --> 00:16:03,652 HOW CAN I HELP YOU? 299 00:16:03,721 --> 00:16:05,654 DO YOU KNOW WHERE THE SANTA MONICA AIRPORT IS? 300 00:16:06,655 --> 00:16:08,174 IT'S THAT WAY. 301 00:16:08,243 --> 00:16:10,314 THAT WAY? THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 302 00:16:10,383 --> 00:16:12,005 - YOU'RE GONNA JUST HANG THERE LIKE THIS? - YEAH. 303 00:16:12,074 --> 00:16:13,973 THANK YOU. OH, MY GOODNESS. 304 00:16:14,042 --> 00:16:15,733 - OH! - THIS IS TERRIFYING ME. 305 00:16:15,802 --> 00:16:18,770 KEEP JOGGING. DON'T -- DON'T MESS YOUR CARDIO UP. 306 00:16:18,839 --> 00:16:20,393 OKAY. THANK YOU, SWEETIE. 307 00:16:20,462 --> 00:16:21,981 YOU'RE WELCOME. BYE. 308 00:16:22,050 --> 00:16:23,637 - GOOD LUCK. - THANK YOU. 309 00:16:32,198 --> 00:16:33,440 - HELLO. - HI. 310 00:16:33,509 --> 00:16:35,649 HOW ARE YOU? 311 00:16:35,718 --> 00:16:37,341 DOING ALL RIGHT. YOU? GOOD. 312 00:16:37,410 --> 00:16:39,205 ARE YOU FROM AROUND HERE? 313 00:16:39,274 --> 00:16:40,689 I'M FROM HOLLYWOOD. 314 00:16:40,758 --> 00:16:43,933 YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'RE...FROM CALIFORNIA. 315 00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:45,832 YOU'RE AWFULLY HANDSOME. 316 00:16:45,901 --> 00:16:47,523 WHAT IS THIS? WHO ARE YOU? 317 00:16:47,592 --> 00:16:49,491 RICARDO. 318 00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:52,218 THIS IS NOT GONNA WORK. I ASKED YOU FOR A REDHEAD. 319 00:16:52,287 --> 00:16:53,529 - A REDHEAD? FOR WHAT? - I CAN'T BELIEVE -- 320 00:16:53,598 --> 00:16:55,083 I THINK HE'S VERY HANDSOME. 321 00:16:55,152 --> 00:16:56,636 HE'LL BE GREAT FOR OUR THREESOME. 322 00:16:56,705 --> 00:16:58,741 - HE'S NOT A REDHEAD. - THREESOME? 323 00:17:08,751 --> 00:17:10,443 SHOW US YOUR BOOBIES! 324 00:17:10,512 --> 00:17:11,720 SHOW US YOUR BOOBIES! 325 00:17:11,789 --> 00:17:13,273 - MARDI GRAS TIME! - MARDI GRAS! MARDI GRAS! 326 00:17:13,342 --> 00:17:15,793 GET A PRESENT. YOU GET A PRESENT. 327 00:17:17,381 --> 00:17:18,451 HEY! HEY! 328 00:17:18,520 --> 00:17:20,142 WHOA! WHOA! 329 00:17:20,211 --> 00:17:21,247 SHOW US YOUR BOOBIES! 330 00:17:21,316 --> 00:17:22,662 COME ON, SHOW US YOUR TA-TAS! 331 00:17:22,731 --> 00:17:24,284 HEY! SHOW US YOUR HOOTERS! 332 00:17:24,353 --> 00:17:26,010 ONE BOOBY WILL DO! 333 00:17:26,079 --> 00:17:27,908 ONE EACH. ONE EACH. 334 00:17:27,977 --> 00:17:29,255 IT'S MY BUCKET LIST. 335 00:17:29,324 --> 00:17:31,498 - COME BACK! - GET A NECKLACE! 336 00:17:31,567 --> 00:17:32,706 HERE YOU GO. 337 00:17:32,775 --> 00:17:35,330 SHOW US YOUR BOOBS -- GET A NECKLACE. 338 00:17:35,399 --> 00:17:38,264 WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! 339 00:17:43,234 --> 00:17:44,373 HI. HI. HOW ARE YOU? 340 00:17:44,442 --> 00:17:45,754 GOOD. HOW ARE YOU TODAY? 341 00:17:45,823 --> 00:17:48,032 WELL. THANK YOU. GOOD. WHAT ARE YOU HAVING? 342 00:17:48,101 --> 00:17:49,137 A TUNA SANDWICH? 343 00:17:49,206 --> 00:17:50,448 - A TUNA SANDWICH? - YEAH. 344 00:17:50,517 --> 00:17:52,001 CHICKEN ON A SALAD. 345 00:17:53,244 --> 00:17:54,590 OH. 346 00:17:54,659 --> 00:17:56,454 IT'S NOT WORKING. 347 00:17:56,523 --> 00:17:58,629 OKAY. HERE'S THE DEAL. 348 00:17:58,698 --> 00:18:00,389 CAN YOU DO THE NINE TIME TABLES? 349 00:18:00,458 --> 00:18:02,011 I CAN, YEAH. OKAY. 350 00:18:02,081 --> 00:18:04,324 IF YOU GIVE ME YOUR NINE TIME TABLES, 351 00:18:04,393 --> 00:18:06,119 I WILL PAY FOR YOUR MEAL. 352 00:18:06,188 --> 00:18:07,810 IT'S ON THE HOUSE. HOW ABOUT THAT? 353 00:18:07,879 --> 00:18:10,848 9, 18, 27, 36, 45...3s. 354 00:18:10,917 --> 00:18:12,332 ALMOST. 355 00:18:12,401 --> 00:18:14,127 WHAT'D I MISS? 9 TIMES 7. 356 00:18:14,196 --> 00:18:15,956 - 54. - THAT'S WHAT I GOT. 357 00:18:16,025 --> 00:18:17,441 WHAT? ANYWAY... 358 00:18:17,510 --> 00:18:21,962 IF YOU GIVE ME A LITTLE DANCE, I WILL PAY FOR YOUR MEAL. 359 00:18:22,031 --> 00:18:23,585 - A LITTLE DANCE? - A LITTLE DANCE. 360 00:18:23,654 --> 00:18:24,896 COME ON. 361 00:18:24,965 --> 00:18:26,760 COME ON. COME ON, LET'S GO. 362 00:18:26,829 --> 00:18:29,591 COME ON. A REAL DA-- ARE YOU REALLY? COME ON. 363 00:18:29,660 --> 00:18:32,111 COME ON, LET'S GO. 364 00:18:32,180 --> 00:18:34,113 COME ON. A LITTLE MORE THAN THAT. 365 00:18:34,182 --> 00:18:35,424 THAT'S ALL WE GOT IN US. 366 00:18:35,493 --> 00:18:36,805 WE'D JUST LIKE TO PAY, PLEASE. 367 00:18:36,874 --> 00:18:38,703 IT'S ON ME. 368 00:18:38,772 --> 00:18:40,015 IT'S ON ME. THANK YOU. 369 00:18:40,084 --> 00:18:41,637 YOU'RE WELCOME. HAVE A GOOD DAY. 370 00:18:41,706 --> 00:18:42,983 THANK YOU. 371 00:18:57,929 --> 00:18:59,759 EXCUSE ME, SIR. 372 00:18:59,828 --> 00:19:01,795 - YOUR FLY IS OPEN. - OH. 373 00:19:01,864 --> 00:19:03,072 MADE YOU LOOK. 374 00:19:05,385 --> 00:19:06,628 YOUR FLY IS OPEN. 375 00:19:06,697 --> 00:19:10,321 Woman: MADE YOU LOOK. 376 00:19:12,772 --> 00:19:15,430 EXCUSE ME, SIR. YOUR FLY IS OPEN. 377 00:19:15,499 --> 00:19:18,329 - OH, I'M SORRY. - MADE YOU LOOK. 378 00:19:23,541 --> 00:19:25,405 HE CROSSED HIMSELF. 379 00:19:25,474 --> 00:19:28,270 - IT WAS OPEN. - IT WAS OPEN. 380 00:19:40,144 --> 00:19:41,835 I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE UP TO. 381 00:19:43,320 --> 00:19:45,184 SORRY? DO YOU THINK I'M STUPID? 382 00:19:46,323 --> 00:19:48,256 I WAS ON THE FORCE FOR 40 YEARS. 383 00:19:48,325 --> 00:19:50,189 TRUST ME. WHAT ARE YOU GUYS PLANNING? 384 00:19:50,258 --> 00:19:52,087 SORRY? WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING? 385 00:19:53,364 --> 00:19:55,573 - WHAT? - THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I THOUGHT YOU'D SAY. 386 00:19:55,642 --> 00:19:57,748 NOW, WHY DON'T YOU GO TELL SOMEBODY ELSE THOSE LIES? 387 00:19:57,817 --> 00:19:59,163 CAN I GIVE YOU A PIECE OF ADVICE? 388 00:19:59,232 --> 00:20:00,164 YEAH, GO AHEAD. 389 00:20:00,233 --> 00:20:01,683 DROP WHAT YOU'RE DOING. 390 00:20:01,752 --> 00:20:05,100 KEEP YOUR NOSES CLEAN AND DROP THE ILLEGAL ACTIVITY. 391 00:20:05,169 --> 00:20:07,378 DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M TELLING YOU? 392 00:20:07,447 --> 00:20:08,724 DO YOU UNDERSTAND? 393 00:20:08,793 --> 00:20:10,174 YES, SIR. 394 00:20:10,243 --> 00:20:12,901 BUT IF YOU -- I'M GONNA KEEP A CLOSE EYE ON YOU. 395 00:20:12,970 --> 00:20:14,074 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 396 00:20:14,143 --> 00:20:15,697 YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. 397 00:20:15,766 --> 00:20:18,389 NO, ACTUALLY. 398 00:20:27,018 --> 00:20:29,020 WHAT? 399 00:20:34,440 --> 00:20:35,717 AT THE END OF THE SHOW, 400 00:20:35,786 --> 00:20:38,133 I ALWAYS LIKE TO BRING OUT A NICE BOTTLE OF WINE. 401 00:20:40,100 --> 00:20:42,137 OHO, MICHAEL. 402 00:20:42,206 --> 00:20:43,587 DON'T WORRY. 403 00:20:43,656 --> 00:20:46,106 WHAT HAPPENS AT BETTY'S STAYS AT BETTY'S. 404 00:20:47,694 --> 00:20:51,353 WELL, THAT'S IT FOR TONIGHT. SEE YOU NEXT TIME. 27267

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