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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:16,016 --> 00:00:17,638 Man: OHH! 2 00:00:17,707 --> 00:00:18,846 GET OFF! 3 00:00:18,915 --> 00:00:20,296 DIDN'T YOU SEE ME IN THAT CROSSWALK? 4 00:00:20,365 --> 00:00:21,676 LET ME OFF YOUR HOOD! 5 00:00:21,745 --> 00:00:23,713 YOU OLD GEEZER! 6 00:00:23,782 --> 00:00:25,853 SOMEBODY HELP! WHERE YOU GOING? 7 00:00:25,922 --> 00:00:27,406 GET THE HELL OFF OF IT! 8 00:00:27,475 --> 00:00:29,926 HEY! WHAT, ARE YOU CRAZY? 9 00:00:29,995 --> 00:00:31,169 GET OFF MY CAR! 10 00:00:31,238 --> 00:00:33,619 YOU IDIOT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 11 00:00:33,688 --> 00:00:35,173 GET OFF! WHOA! 12 00:00:35,242 --> 00:00:37,175 AAH! 13 00:00:55,986 --> 00:00:57,022 HEY! 14 00:00:58,782 --> 00:00:59,956 TAKE MY PICTURE! 15 00:01:03,477 --> 00:01:04,512 OH! 16 00:01:05,237 --> 00:01:06,445 OH, MY GOD! 17 00:01:08,792 --> 00:01:10,691 HIT ME! 18 00:01:11,692 --> 00:01:13,003 COME BACK HERE! 19 00:01:15,109 --> 00:01:16,731 SAY "BIG BOOBS." 20 00:01:21,460 --> 00:01:24,049 AAAAAAH! OH! 21 00:01:36,786 --> 00:01:39,168 OH, HELLO, THERE. I'M BETTY WHITE. 22 00:01:39,237 --> 00:01:41,066 WELCOME TO "OFF THEIR ROCKERS," 23 00:01:41,135 --> 00:01:44,345 WHERE SENIORS PREFER TO AGE DISGRACEFULLY. 24 00:01:47,693 --> 00:01:49,005 FORE! 25 00:01:50,524 --> 00:01:52,284 Man: WHAT THE HELL? 26 00:01:52,353 --> 00:01:55,322 WHAT DO YOU KNOW? A HOLE IN ONE. 27 00:01:55,391 --> 00:01:58,946 OH, IT'S AMAZING HOW MUCH FUN YOU CAN HAVE 28 00:01:59,015 --> 00:02:01,397 IF YOU'VE GOT THE BALLS. 29 00:02:08,542 --> 00:02:09,853 EXCUSE ME. 30 00:02:09,922 --> 00:02:12,373 DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT PINEAPPLES, 31 00:02:12,442 --> 00:02:13,857 IF THEY'RE GOOD OR NOT? 32 00:02:13,926 --> 00:02:16,101 USUALLY, IT'S THE SPOTS. 33 00:02:16,170 --> 00:02:19,069 YOU DON'T WANT THE COLOR TO BE TURNING TOO BROWN. 34 00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:20,416 YEAH? 35 00:02:20,485 --> 00:02:22,211 DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A GOOD ONE TO YOU? 36 00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:24,937 YOU KNOW, I'VE ALSO HAD THEM HELP ME PICK ONE OUT. 37 00:02:25,006 --> 00:02:26,629 - YEAH? - JUST THE GUYS HERE. 38 00:02:26,698 --> 00:02:28,493 AND YOU DON'T WANT THIS TO GET TOO DRY. 39 00:02:28,562 --> 00:02:30,184 I'LL TRY IT -- I'LL TRY IT ANYWAY. 40 00:02:30,253 --> 00:02:32,807 YEAH. OH. 41 00:02:32,876 --> 00:02:35,085 TOUCHDOWN! 42 00:02:51,343 --> 00:02:53,380 - Richard: OH, HI. - HI. 43 00:02:53,449 --> 00:02:55,416 OH, BOY, IT'S TOUGH GETTING OLD. 44 00:02:55,485 --> 00:02:57,384 I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, I WALKED 10 FEET 45 00:02:57,453 --> 00:02:58,937 AND I'M LOSING MY BREATH ALREADY. 46 00:02:59,006 --> 00:03:01,388 - OH. - BUT I HAVE THIS OXYGEN. 47 00:03:01,457 --> 00:03:03,044 I JUST GOT THIS, 48 00:03:03,113 --> 00:03:07,221 AND, UH, I COULD USE A HIT RIGHT NOW, I'LL TELL YOU. 49 00:03:13,158 --> 00:03:14,539 THAT SHOULD DO IT. 50 00:03:14,608 --> 00:03:16,748 THAT SHOULD DO IT. 51 00:03:16,817 --> 00:03:18,612 SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT HERE. 52 00:03:18,681 --> 00:03:21,718 THIS DOESN'T FEEL LIKE OXYGEN. 53 00:03:21,787 --> 00:03:23,617 FEELS LIKE HELIUM. 54 00:03:23,686 --> 00:03:24,928 YOU KNOW WHAT? 55 00:03:24,997 --> 00:03:27,379 I THINK THEY GAVE ME THE WRONG TANK AT THE STORE. 56 00:03:27,448 --> 00:03:29,554 THEY SAY THESE THINGS CAN EXPLODE. I DON'T KNOW. 57 00:03:29,623 --> 00:03:31,763 AH, WHAT THE HELL? 58 00:03:37,700 --> 00:03:40,081 OH, ! 59 00:03:40,150 --> 00:03:42,567 THOUGHT IT WAS GONNA EXPLODE. 60 00:03:42,636 --> 00:03:43,602 WHEW! 61 00:03:43,671 --> 00:03:46,847 OH, MY GOD. FORGET ABOUT IT. 62 00:04:07,868 --> 00:04:09,766 UH, DO YOU HAVE THE TIME? 63 00:04:09,835 --> 00:04:10,871 WHAT? 64 00:04:10,940 --> 00:04:13,011 DO YOU HAVE THE TIME? 65 00:04:15,220 --> 00:04:17,809 UH...IT'S 12:30. 66 00:04:17,878 --> 00:04:20,501 OH. THEN WE'RE BOTH A LITTLE EARLY. 67 00:04:20,570 --> 00:04:22,123 UM... 68 00:04:22,192 --> 00:04:24,333 I'M JUST HERE, LIKE -- I'M ALREADY DONE. 69 00:04:24,402 --> 00:04:26,818 I'M LOOKING FOR A JOB RIGHT NOW. 70 00:04:26,887 --> 00:04:29,165 OH. SO, UH... 71 00:04:29,234 --> 00:04:31,167 DO YOU WANT TO SIT HERE AND TALK FOR A LITTLE BIT, 72 00:04:31,236 --> 00:04:34,412 OR DO YOU WANT TO GO STRAIGHT BACK TO YOUR PLACE? 73 00:04:34,481 --> 00:04:35,516 WHAT? 74 00:04:35,585 --> 00:04:37,380 YOU WANT TO GO STRAIGHT BACK TO YOUR PLACE, 75 00:04:37,449 --> 00:04:39,900 OR DO YOU WANT TO SIT HERE AND TALK FOR A LITTLE WHILE? 76 00:04:39,969 --> 00:04:41,764 OH, UM... 77 00:04:41,833 --> 00:04:43,869 I'M KIND OF NEW AT THIS. 78 00:04:43,938 --> 00:04:46,113 YOU SEEM LIKE YOU'RE KIND OF NEW AT THIS, TOO. 79 00:04:46,182 --> 00:04:49,047 NEW AT WHAT? JUST SITTING HERE? 80 00:04:49,116 --> 00:04:53,293 NO, AREN'T YOU THE HORNY GUY FROM THE INTERNET 81 00:04:53,362 --> 00:04:56,296 THAT HAD A GRANNY FETISH? 82 00:04:58,194 --> 00:05:00,817 I ANSWERED YOUR AD. AREN'T YOU -- 83 00:05:00,886 --> 00:05:02,957 OH, MY GOD. 84 00:05:03,026 --> 00:05:06,167 I'M SORRY. THAT IS NOT ME. 85 00:05:06,236 --> 00:05:08,204 OH. WELL... 86 00:05:08,273 --> 00:05:09,343 ACTUALLY, I'M GLAD, 87 00:05:09,412 --> 00:05:12,657 'CAUSE YOU'RE REALLY A LITTLE TOO OLD FOR ME. 88 00:05:12,726 --> 00:05:14,590 SORRY. 89 00:05:16,764 --> 00:05:19,457 WHAT THE ? 90 00:05:21,528 --> 00:05:24,910 THEY SAY YOU'RE ONLY AS OLD AS YOU FEEL. 91 00:05:24,979 --> 00:05:27,879 WELL, TODAY, I FEEL LIKE 50. 92 00:05:27,948 --> 00:05:33,298 THAT'S 25 ON MY LEFT AND 25 ON MY RIGHT. 93 00:05:33,367 --> 00:05:36,094 I LOVE TWINS. 94 00:05:42,928 --> 00:05:45,621 EXCUSE ME. CAN I TALK TO YOU FOR A SECOND? 95 00:05:45,690 --> 00:05:50,177 I'M PART OF AN ORGANIZATION FOR CITIZENS FOR A BEAUTIFUL PLANET. 96 00:05:50,246 --> 00:05:54,077 AND WE FEEL THAT IF WE JUST HAD BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE MAKING BABIES 97 00:05:54,146 --> 00:05:56,563 THAT IT WOULD BE A MUCH MORE BEAUTIFUL WORLD FOR EVERYBODY. 98 00:05:56,632 --> 00:05:57,702 DON'T YOU AGREE? 99 00:05:57,771 --> 00:05:59,255 UM, I GUESS. 100 00:05:59,324 --> 00:06:00,843 I JUST WONDERED IF YOU'D SIGN OUR PETITION. 101 00:06:00,912 --> 00:06:03,535 SINCE YOU ARE A LITTLE UNATTRACTIVE, 102 00:06:03,604 --> 00:06:06,987 WE WOULD ASK YOU NOT TO HAVE ANY CHILDREN. 103 00:06:07,056 --> 00:06:10,231 WOULD YOU CONSIDER DOING THAT, NEVER HAVING CHILDREN? 104 00:06:10,300 --> 00:06:11,785 NO. 105 00:06:11,854 --> 00:06:13,476 BECAUSE ONLY 30% ARE REALLY BEAUTIFUL. 106 00:06:13,545 --> 00:06:15,064 IMAGINE IF THOSE 30% 107 00:06:15,133 --> 00:06:16,652 WERE THE ONLY ONES WHO HAD CHILDREN TODAY. 108 00:06:16,721 --> 00:06:18,792 WHAT A BEAUTIFUL PLANET WE'D HAVE. 109 00:06:18,861 --> 00:06:20,828 SO YOU'RE TELLING ME I'M NOT IN THAT 30% 110 00:06:20,897 --> 00:06:22,382 SO I SHOULDN'T REPRODUCE. 111 00:06:22,451 --> 00:06:24,556 NO. AND YOU SHOULDN'T REPRODUCE. 112 00:06:24,625 --> 00:06:26,800 THAT'S A HORRIBLE THING TO TELL PEOPLE. 113 00:06:26,869 --> 00:06:28,388 REALLY? 114 00:06:28,457 --> 00:06:32,081 AN UGLY PERSON WOULD SAY THAT. 115 00:06:36,879 --> 00:06:38,259 OH, EXCUSE ME. 116 00:06:38,328 --> 00:06:40,089 MAYBE YOU COULD ANSWER THIS. 117 00:06:40,158 --> 00:06:43,575 MY GRANDSON, HE TALKED ME INTO GETTING ONE OF THESE PIERCINGS. 118 00:06:43,644 --> 00:06:44,818 YEAH. 119 00:06:44,887 --> 00:06:47,165 DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TAKES BEFORE IT HEALS? 120 00:06:47,234 --> 00:06:50,720 IT'LL BE, IN THE NOSE, PROBABLY LIKE FOUR DAYS. 121 00:06:50,789 --> 00:06:52,412 IN ABOUT FOUR DAYS? 122 00:06:52,481 --> 00:06:55,898 BECAUSE IT HURTS LIKE HELL, ESPECIALLY THE ONE DOWN HERE. 123 00:07:08,013 --> 00:07:10,326 OH! WELL, HELLO, THERE. 124 00:07:10,395 --> 00:07:12,639 I'M JUST TENDING TO THE ROSES. 125 00:07:12,708 --> 00:07:16,677 OH, THEY'RE ALL SO BEAUTIFUL IN THEIR OWN WAY. 126 00:07:16,746 --> 00:07:20,025 BETTY, PLEASE STOP COMING IN MY YARD. 127 00:07:20,094 --> 00:07:23,132 AND LEAVE MY FLOWERS ALONE. 128 00:07:23,201 --> 00:07:25,445 OUCH! 129 00:07:25,514 --> 00:07:27,964 LOOKS LIKE I GOT MYSELF A LITTLE PRICK. 130 00:07:28,033 --> 00:07:29,310 MM. 131 00:07:43,808 --> 00:07:44,878 YOU GUYS VALET? 132 00:07:44,947 --> 00:07:46,120 HUH? 133 00:07:46,189 --> 00:07:47,984 WIPE IT DOWN, WILL YOU? 134 00:07:50,021 --> 00:07:51,125 WHO GIVES A ? 135 00:07:51,194 --> 00:07:54,715 YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW. 136 00:07:54,784 --> 00:07:56,096 IS THIS IT? JUST TAKE IT! 137 00:07:56,165 --> 00:07:57,511 IS THAT WHAT JUST HAPPENED? 138 00:07:59,064 --> 00:08:01,101 - WHAT THE HELL? - ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW? 139 00:08:01,170 --> 00:08:04,449 HEY, HEY, LET ME TAKE A PICTURE OF THIS DUDE. 140 00:08:14,148 --> 00:08:16,634 OH, GOD. 141 00:08:17,945 --> 00:08:19,395 HELLO? 142 00:08:19,464 --> 00:08:21,397 NO, I'M AT THE AIRPORT. 143 00:08:21,466 --> 00:08:24,331 I HAVE TO FLY TODAY, AND I'M SO HUNGOVER. 144 00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:27,921 OH, WE STAYED UP TILL 3:00. 145 00:08:27,990 --> 00:08:29,543 I DRANK MYSELF SILLY. 146 00:08:29,612 --> 00:08:31,856 I DON'T -- I DON'T KNOW HOW I'M GONNA FACE THESE PEOPLE, 147 00:08:31,925 --> 00:08:33,478 THESE IDIOTS. 148 00:08:33,547 --> 00:08:36,550 "MA'AM, CAN I HAVE SOME MORE PEANUTS? 149 00:08:36,619 --> 00:08:39,967 I DON'T LIKE THOSE CRACKERS. I WANT A COKE." 150 00:08:40,036 --> 00:08:42,349 YEAH, IT'S JUST HORRIBLE. 151 00:08:42,418 --> 00:08:45,076 I HATE THIS JOB. 152 00:08:45,145 --> 00:08:46,974 I DON'T THINK I CAN FACE IT MUCH LONGER. 153 00:08:47,043 --> 00:08:49,770 IT'S JUST -- UGH! I HATE PEOPLE. 154 00:08:49,839 --> 00:08:52,393 OH, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO. 155 00:08:52,462 --> 00:08:55,396 I GUESS CONTINUE TO DRINK MYSELF TO DEATH. 156 00:08:55,465 --> 00:09:00,298 IF I SEE ONE MORE PERSON WITH THEIR CELLPHONE ON 157 00:09:00,367 --> 00:09:04,129 WHEN WE'RE TAKING OFF, I SWEAR TO YOU, I'M GONNA SLUG THEM. 158 00:09:04,198 --> 00:09:06,649 I JUST HATE IT! 159 00:09:32,330 --> 00:09:34,297 IT'S STARTING TO COOL DOWN A LITTLE BIT, HUH? 160 00:09:34,366 --> 00:09:36,230 - IT'S GETTING NICER NOW. - I KNOW. 161 00:09:36,299 --> 00:09:37,956 IT WAS MISERABLE TODAY. 162 00:09:38,025 --> 00:09:39,475 IT WAS REALLY HOT. 163 00:09:39,544 --> 00:09:42,305 I'M NOT FROM THIS AREA. I'M FROM NEW YORK. 164 00:09:42,374 --> 00:09:46,033 AND THIS WEATHER IS UNBELIEVABLE, YOU KNOW? 165 00:09:46,102 --> 00:09:47,794 I'M NICK, BY THE WAY. AMANDA. 166 00:09:47,863 --> 00:09:50,348 - HI, AMANDA. CAN I SIT DOWN FOR A MINUTE? - SURE. 167 00:09:50,417 --> 00:09:51,867 YEAH. JUST WAITING FOR A FRIEND. 168 00:09:51,936 --> 00:09:53,972 WELL, WE'LL WAIT TOGETHER. 169 00:09:54,041 --> 00:09:56,354 YOU KNOW SOMETHING -- I'VE GOT TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH -- 170 00:09:56,423 --> 00:10:00,013 I NEED TO TALK TO SOMEBODY 'CAUSE I'M SCARED TO DEATH. 171 00:10:00,082 --> 00:10:01,842 I WENT TO A DERMATOLOGIST, 172 00:10:01,911 --> 00:10:06,606 AND HE THINKS I HAVE SOME KIND OF A RARE SKIN FUNGUS, 173 00:10:06,675 --> 00:10:09,298 AND HE THINKS IT'S THE BEGINNING STAGES, 174 00:10:09,367 --> 00:10:11,645 AND ITCHES REALLY BAD. 175 00:10:11,714 --> 00:10:14,337 DOES THAT LOOK WEIRD TO YOU? 176 00:10:14,406 --> 00:10:16,305 BECAUSE HE SAYS I COULD HAVE PICKED IT UP 177 00:10:16,374 --> 00:10:17,755 FROM SHAKING SOMEBODY'S HAND. 178 00:10:17,824 --> 00:10:20,896 BUT I DON'T THINK IT'S THAT BAD. 179 00:10:20,965 --> 00:10:23,070 I MEAN... 180 00:10:23,139 --> 00:10:25,452 I WOULD LISTEN TO HIM, I MEAN, HE'S... 181 00:10:25,521 --> 00:10:27,247 YOU THINK I SHOULD LISTEN TO HIM? 182 00:10:27,316 --> 00:10:28,904 HE SAID THIS IS THE BEGINNING. 183 00:10:28,973 --> 00:10:32,010 AND IT'S GONNA OPEN UP, AND -- I HATE TO SAY THE WORD -- 184 00:10:32,079 --> 00:10:33,460 BUT HE SAID IT'S GONNA GET PUS-Y. 185 00:10:33,529 --> 00:10:35,082 I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO OVER HERE. 186 00:10:35,151 --> 00:10:36,256 YOU KNOW, HE SAID -- 187 00:10:36,325 --> 00:10:38,016 MAYBE YOU SHOULD GO GET A SECOND OPINION. 188 00:10:38,085 --> 00:10:40,260 MAYBE THAT'S A GOOD IDEA. I'M GONNA DO THAT. 189 00:10:40,329 --> 00:10:42,158 I'M GONNA GO CALL MY WIFE AND TELL HER, 190 00:10:42,227 --> 00:10:43,608 "LET'S FIND ANOTHER DOCTOR." 191 00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:45,334 - THANK YOU SO MUCH. - YOU'RE WELCOME. 192 00:10:45,403 --> 00:10:48,026 YOU WERE VERY NICE -- VERY NICE TO TAKE SOME TIME 193 00:10:48,095 --> 00:10:51,789 AND MAKE ME FEEL BETTER 'CAUSE I WAS REALLY SCARED. 194 00:10:51,858 --> 00:10:53,860 OKAY. 195 00:11:21,508 --> 00:11:23,406 CAN YOU ANSWER A QUESTION? 196 00:11:23,475 --> 00:11:25,581 YOU'RE YOUNG ENOUGH TO ANSWER A QUESTION FOR US, OKAY? 197 00:11:25,650 --> 00:11:26,686 SURE. 198 00:11:26,755 --> 00:11:28,135 Woman: SETTLE SOMETHING FOR US, PLEASE. 199 00:11:28,204 --> 00:11:29,689 IF JUSTIN BIEBER WAS SINGLE, 200 00:11:29,758 --> 00:11:32,899 WOULD HE CHOOSE ME OR THIS SKANK? 201 00:11:32,968 --> 00:11:34,763 AAH! 202 00:11:49,916 --> 00:11:51,400 OH, EXCUSE ME, SIR. 203 00:11:51,469 --> 00:11:53,851 WOULD YOU DO ME A FAVOR? 204 00:11:53,920 --> 00:11:57,233 I'VE BEEN TRYING LIKE THE DEVIL TO GET MY GRANDSON IN EUROPE 205 00:11:57,302 --> 00:11:59,926 AND I JUST CANNOT GET HIM. 206 00:11:59,995 --> 00:12:03,239 AND I WAS WONDERING IF YOU COULD DIAL FOR ME. 207 00:12:03,308 --> 00:12:04,965 WOULD THAT BE TOO MUCH TROUBLE? 208 00:12:05,034 --> 00:12:06,173 NO. WHAT IS IT? 209 00:12:06,242 --> 00:12:09,349 OH, IT'S 011... 210 00:12:09,418 --> 00:12:13,422 32-3... 211 00:12:13,491 --> 00:12:18,220 292-67-90... 212 00:12:18,289 --> 00:12:21,879 005... 213 00:12:21,948 --> 00:12:27,022 888-132... 214 00:12:27,091 --> 00:12:33,235 487-91-91... 215 00:12:33,304 --> 00:12:35,444 0... 216 00:12:38,827 --> 00:12:43,901 0-8... 217 00:12:43,970 --> 00:12:48,043 11-333... 218 00:12:48,112 --> 00:12:50,977 I'M SORRY. I MADE A MISTAKE. 219 00:12:51,046 --> 00:12:52,910 LET'S START OVER. 220 00:13:02,298 --> 00:13:04,576 I'M SICK OF YOU CHEATING AT CHECKERS! 221 00:13:04,645 --> 00:13:05,577 COME ON! 222 00:13:05,646 --> 00:13:07,545 YAH! 223 00:13:07,614 --> 00:13:09,098 OOH! 224 00:13:09,167 --> 00:13:11,445 Man: THAT'LL TEACH YOU. 225 00:13:11,514 --> 00:13:12,722 HEY! YOU OLD GEEZER. 226 00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:14,932 YOU SEE THAT? HE CHEATED! 227 00:13:15,001 --> 00:13:16,243 YEAH. 228 00:13:19,729 --> 00:13:23,941 "AND ALONG CAME THE WOLF AND SAID, 'LITTLE PIG, LET ME IN.' 229 00:13:24,010 --> 00:13:27,151 'NOT BY THE HAIR OF MY CHINNY-CHIN-CHIN!' 230 00:13:27,220 --> 00:13:31,811 'THEN I'LL HUFF AND I'LL PUFF, AND I'LL BLOW YOUR HOUSE IN!' 231 00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:34,814 AND THE LITTLE PIG SUED THE WOLF FOR HARASSMENT, 232 00:13:34,883 --> 00:13:37,955 WON A BUNDLE, AND MOVED TO BOCA RATON." 233 00:13:38,024 --> 00:13:40,681 OH, I LOVE THAT STORY. 234 00:13:40,750 --> 00:13:43,961 NOW YOU GO BRUSH YOUR TEETH, AND THEN I'LL READ YOU THE STORY 235 00:13:44,030 --> 00:13:46,204 ABOUT HOW SNOW WHITE HAD TO PRETEND 236 00:13:46,273 --> 00:13:48,551 THAT PRINCE CHARMING WAS HER FIRST. 237 00:13:58,941 --> 00:14:00,667 HEY, EXCUSE ME. 238 00:14:00,736 --> 00:14:02,669 HI. HI. 239 00:14:02,738 --> 00:14:05,189 YOU KNOW THEY USED TO MAKE THESE EGGS IN A CARTON OF SIX. 240 00:14:05,258 --> 00:14:06,224 REALLY? 241 00:14:06,293 --> 00:14:08,261 YEAH. LOOK. 242 00:14:08,330 --> 00:14:09,883 CAN YOU HOLD THIS, PLEASE? YEAH. 243 00:14:09,952 --> 00:14:13,576 I MEAN, THERE'S 12 OF THEM. I DON'T NEED 12. I'M SINGLE. 244 00:14:13,645 --> 00:14:14,923 YEAH. 245 00:14:14,992 --> 00:14:18,650 I MEAN, REALLY, WHY WOULD I NEED THIS? 246 00:14:18,719 --> 00:14:20,998 I DON'T KNOW, BUT THIS IS AWESOME. 247 00:14:24,173 --> 00:14:25,623 ONE MORE. 248 00:14:29,075 --> 00:14:30,524 THAT'S DONE. ALL RIGHT. 249 00:14:30,593 --> 00:14:31,871 OKAY. 250 00:14:44,676 --> 00:14:46,230 OH, LET'S START OVER. 251 00:14:46,299 --> 00:14:49,164 0... 252 00:14:49,233 --> 00:14:50,475 11... 253 00:14:50,544 --> 00:14:52,167 OKAY, 011... 254 00:14:52,236 --> 00:14:57,379 292-67-70... 255 00:14:57,448 --> 00:14:59,829 67-70. 256 00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:02,211 005... 257 00:15:02,280 --> 00:15:05,905 888-123... 258 00:15:05,974 --> 00:15:08,079 457... 259 00:15:08,148 --> 00:15:13,119 33-440... 260 00:15:13,188 --> 00:15:16,156 682... 261 00:15:16,225 --> 00:15:20,436 75-75. 262 00:15:20,505 --> 00:15:22,645 HAVE YOU GOTTEN ALL THAT? 263 00:15:24,406 --> 00:15:26,995 I THINK SO. HERE. 264 00:15:27,064 --> 00:15:29,825 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 265 00:15:32,172 --> 00:15:35,348 OH, IT'S THE WRONG NUMBER. 266 00:16:08,208 --> 00:16:10,452 YEAH, BABY. OH, COME ON. 267 00:16:10,521 --> 00:16:12,730 EAT SOME MORE DINNER. COME ON. COME ON. 268 00:16:12,799 --> 00:16:15,284 YEAH. YEAH. 269 00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:42,070 SIR, WOULD YOU LIKE ANOTHER HIT? 270 00:16:42,139 --> 00:16:44,796 OH, YEAH. HIT ME UP. 271 00:16:44,865 --> 00:16:46,212 DOUBLE. 272 00:16:46,281 --> 00:16:48,421 DOUBLE, HUH? YEAH. YEAH, YEAH. 273 00:16:48,490 --> 00:16:50,975 ALL RIGHT. 274 00:16:51,044 --> 00:16:53,840 PERFECT. 275 00:16:53,909 --> 00:16:55,876 THAT'S NOT FREE, YOU KNOW? NOPE. THANK YOU. 276 00:16:55,945 --> 00:16:57,568 THERE YOU GO. 277 00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:24,284 RICHARD, I CAN'T BELIEVE I MADE IT TO 90. 278 00:17:24,353 --> 00:17:26,666 WOW. YOU THINK WE'LL GET TO 100? 279 00:17:26,735 --> 00:17:28,599 WORTH A SHOT. 280 00:17:33,431 --> 00:17:35,951 WHAT? IT'S PRUNE JUICE. 281 00:17:48,826 --> 00:17:50,483 HI. 282 00:17:52,554 --> 00:17:55,143 DO YOU KNOW -- DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS -- THE TEXTING? 283 00:17:55,212 --> 00:17:56,385 YEAH. 284 00:17:56,454 --> 00:17:58,456 I HAVE A YOUNG, YOUNG LADY FRIEND, 285 00:17:58,525 --> 00:18:00,872 AND SHE'S INTO THE TEXTING, 286 00:18:00,941 --> 00:18:02,840 AND I'M SUPPOSED TO SEND HER A MESSAGE, 287 00:18:02,909 --> 00:18:04,462 BUT I'M NOT -- YEAH. 288 00:18:04,531 --> 00:18:05,946 WOULD YOU MIND TYPING IT IN FOR ME? 289 00:18:06,015 --> 00:18:06,947 YEAH. 290 00:18:07,016 --> 00:18:09,088 UM, OKAY. 291 00:18:09,157 --> 00:18:14,507 UH, "HONEY... I HAVE THE WINE. 292 00:18:14,576 --> 00:18:17,372 YOU BRING THE WHIP AND THE HANDCUFFS." 293 00:18:19,546 --> 00:18:20,961 "TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT." 294 00:18:21,030 --> 00:18:22,825 "YOU BRING THE HANDCUFFS." 295 00:18:22,894 --> 00:18:25,173 "LOVE, MORTIE." 296 00:18:25,242 --> 00:18:26,553 - DID YOU SEND IT? - YEAH. 297 00:18:26,622 --> 00:18:29,384 OH, THANK YOU! OH, BOY. 298 00:18:29,453 --> 00:18:32,318 IF THIS DOESN'T KILL ME, I DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL. 299 00:18:34,354 --> 00:18:37,081 OH, MY GOD, THE FUNNIEST THING EVER IN MY LIFE -- 300 00:18:37,150 --> 00:18:38,669 THIS OLD MAN COMES UP TO ME, AND HE'S LIKE, 301 00:18:38,738 --> 00:18:40,360 "SWEETIE, CAN YOU HELP ME TEXT?" 302 00:18:40,429 --> 00:18:42,431 SO HE'S LIKE, "I WILL BRING THE WINE 303 00:18:42,500 --> 00:18:46,332 AS LONG AS YOU BRING THE WHIPS AND CHAINS." 304 00:18:48,057 --> 00:18:50,784 WHIPS AND CHAINS! 305 00:19:04,246 --> 00:19:06,145 HI. DO YOU MIND IF I JUST STAND HERE? 306 00:19:06,214 --> 00:19:08,077 I'M WAITING FOR MY GRANDSON. 307 00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:09,389 OH, NOT AT ALL. 308 00:19:09,458 --> 00:19:12,427 THANKS. 309 00:19:12,496 --> 00:19:14,118 WHERE...? 310 00:19:15,568 --> 00:19:16,914 KEV-- KEVIN. 311 00:19:16,983 --> 00:19:18,018 HEY, YOU. 312 00:19:18,087 --> 00:19:19,537 HEY, KEVIN. 313 00:19:21,781 --> 00:19:23,058 HOW YOU DOING? 314 00:19:23,127 --> 00:19:25,094 OKAY. DO YOU WANT TO COME MEET MY GRANDSON, HONEY? 315 00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:26,095 YEAH. 316 00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:28,132 ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO, SWEET BABY. 317 00:19:47,979 --> 00:19:49,740 I COULD USE A BEER. COULD YOU? 318 00:19:49,809 --> 00:19:51,086 ABSOLUTELY. 319 00:19:51,155 --> 00:19:52,674 I'M REALLY HOT. 320 00:19:52,743 --> 00:19:53,985 OKAY. THANK YOU. 321 00:19:55,539 --> 00:19:57,644 OH, WAY TO GO, DOUCHEBAG! 322 00:19:57,713 --> 00:19:58,956 WHAT THE ! 323 00:19:59,025 --> 00:20:00,613 ! 324 00:20:00,682 --> 00:20:03,788 LET'S GO SOMEWHERE WHERE WE KNOW WE CAN GET A DRINK! 325 00:20:03,857 --> 00:20:05,134 RIDICULOUS! OH, GOD! 326 00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,240 HUH! CANNOT BELIEVE THIS ! 327 00:20:07,309 --> 00:20:09,656 WORST SERVICE IN THE WORLD -- WORST SERVICE! 328 00:20:09,725 --> 00:20:11,279 ! 329 00:20:18,941 --> 00:20:20,943 OH, MY -- 330 00:20:21,012 --> 00:20:24,326 DID ANYONE VIDEOTAPE THAT? BECAUSE THAT WAS AWESOME. 331 00:20:24,395 --> 00:20:26,086 UNBELIEVABLE. 332 00:20:28,088 --> 00:20:29,538 Man: AND NOW... 333 00:20:32,369 --> 00:20:35,544 I'M NOT AFRAID TO SAY I SLEPT MY WAY TO THE TOP. 334 00:20:35,613 --> 00:20:37,512 OH, NOT WHAT YOU THINK. 335 00:20:37,581 --> 00:20:40,239 NO, I JUST FIND THAT A GOOD NIGHT'S REST 336 00:20:40,308 --> 00:20:44,519 HELPS YOU LEARN YOUR LINES AND GET GREAT PARTS. 337 00:20:44,588 --> 00:20:47,729 'COURSE, THAT OTHER STUFF WORKS BETTER. 338 00:20:47,798 --> 00:20:49,662 GOOD NIGHT. 22555

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