Original subtitles

[♪♪♪]

♪ There's a time for love And a time for livin' ♪

♪ Take a chance And face the wind ♪

♪ An open road and A road that's hidden ♪

♪ A brand-new life Around the bend ♪

♪ There were times ♪

♪ I lost a dream or two ♪

♪ Found the trail ♪

♪ And at the end was you ♪

♪ There's a path you take And a path not taken ♪

♪ The choice is Up to you, my friend ♪

♪ Nights are long But you might awaken ♪

♪ To a brand-new life ♪

♪ Brand-new life ♪

♪ A brand-new life Around the bend ♪

Okay, okay. Car's all loaded with kids and food.

Hey, anybody see that big loaf of french bread?

Uh-oh.

The whole loaf?

I'm carbing up.

I wanted to be at my peak for the race.

They are going to have to roll you over the finish line.

Yeah, come on. Angela, don't take this stuff seriously.

There's no pressure to win,

although I've never lost.

Tony, if you want to pick another partner,

I won't be insulted.

Mona--

Tony!

No, no. Just kidding.

Hey, how we supposed to win this race

if I can't pull your leg?

It's just you're a first-rate athlete.

I'm just not sure these legs

are good enough to run alongside your legs.

Hey, no way. Those legs are great.

Thank you.

And the gams do not fall far from the tree.

All right. All right. Come on.

Assume the three-legged stance. Ready?

On your mark, get set, go!

Come on, go! Come on, go!

I hope we're faster than that.

I'm sorry.

I'm-- I'm so sorry.

For the 83rd time, it is no big deal.

It is just a sprain,

and sprains are a part of sports.

I just never should have stopped to pull up my sock.

You stopped for a sock?

It was all bunchy.

I wouldn't have fallen if you hadn't tried

to drag me across the finish line.

It was only 10 feet away, and the Barofskys were closing in.

You would've won, if Angela hadn't grabbed your other leg.

I didn't think an ankle could bend that far back.

Neither did I.

Do we have to rehash this?

All right. Let's forget about the race

and the fact that we lost out on a great trophy.

Yeah, but look at the bright side.

Just think how happy you made the Barofskys.

[GROANS]

You'll win next year.

Yeah, if you dump my mom.

Ah, look, hey. Let's forget the race.

I'm gonna make us all a very nice dinner.

No-- Tony, remember doctor's orders.

You're supposed to take it easy.

Besides, I'd love to make dinner.

Angela, one disaster a day is enough.

You kidding me?

I would love to cook. What would you like?

Just make it easy, beans and franks.

Oh, that sounds great.

I like that down-home food.

You kidding me? Beans and franks.

I don't open dinner, I cook it.

You kidding me?

We're gonna have veal parmigiana.

Thank God.

Here comes the hobbling gourmet.

Okay...

Okay, let's see...

Tomatoes.

Need some tomatoes.

Ow!

Good idea, that's a good idea.

[GRUNTS]

Maybe I should help Tony.

Oh, Angela, you know how independent he is.

Let him stand on his own two feet.

Nope. I'm gonna give him a hand.

TONY: Angela!

[TONY CRASHES]

I'm sorry.

This time I'm really sorry.

Angela, it's no big deal.

Losing the use of both your legs

is just a part of sports.

Well, I'm going to take care of you.

Right. Watch out for the couch.

Good save. Ow!

Oh, I'm sorry.

Please, Angela.

Let me wheel myself.

I'm running out of limbs.

Can you believe it?

A hairline fracture on one foot

three hours after spraining the other.

What are the odds on that?

About a million to one, but I had help.

Wow! A wheelchair! Cool!

Ooh, nice set of wheels, big boy.

Yeah? What do you say, mama?

Let's cruise the main drag.

You know I'm a pushover for a guy in a convertible.

Or a four-door...

Or a compact.

Or a skateboard.

You know, Tony, that's a great cast,

but what if a pregnant ant crawls up there,

lays eggs, and has babies?

Jonathan, how do you think of these things?

Wait a minute. There was one in my sock from the picnic!

Sweetheart, run along and play with your crustaceans.

I think I'm going to spray for ants.

Dad, Dad, I just remembered. You're gonna miss

parents' night at my school.

That means you won't hear

what my teachers have to say about me.

What do you mean? Doesn't your school have a ramp?

[SCOFFS] Yeah, but the way you're going,

you'd end up in a body cast.

I could tell you exactly what my teachers would've said.

Mr. Black: "Hard worker."

Um...Mrs. Hopkins: "Outstanding penmanship."

Miss Wainwright:

"She's a charmin' child, bright as a lightnin' bug."

You forgot one, you know. Mr. Micelli:

"I'm gonna be there if I have to hire a piano mover."

Tony, you're supposed to follow doctor's orders

and cool it for a week. The only job you have

it to take care of your foot.

Feet.

And I'm gonna call somebody

to take care of the house and look after you.

A stranger in my house? No dice.

Then there's only one solution. Things are light at work--

Great idea! I'll take a leave of absence.

Oh, no, you're not staying home with Tony.

I don't want to stay home with Tony.

I want a week in Atlantic City.

Well, that is not possible.

You're going to have to cover for me

at work while I stay with Tony.

Double no dice.

You already have a job.

There's nothing I can't handle from home.

You have to learn to let people help you with things.

Well, I'm sorry, Angela. But that's not my style.

I'll have you know when I was in school,

I had two jobs, baseball practice,

and I was dating the Benedetti twins.

Let me tell you, they were enough by themselves.

I didn't ask for help then,

and I'm not asking for help now.

So if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go take a shower.

Help me.

Tony!

Tony, your comparison shopper is home.

Tony?

To-- Where are you?

Oh...

You're all wet.

Holy mackerel. You're right!

What happened to you?

The sprinklers, Angela. The sprinklers.

I wheeled out to the sidewalk to get the paper.

And on my way back, you know what I heard?

I heard that water rushing through those pipes.

The next thing I knew those little nozzle heads popped up.

I started wheeling for my life,

but I knew it was too late.

I was caught in a vicious circle of water pellets.

[LAUGHING] You've got to be more careful.

You don't know how to maneuver this thing.

Says you. Stand back.

[GASPS]

Huh?

This is called a wheelie, huh?

And then I...

[GASPS]

I get a little comfortable, eh, you know.

And then I go...

[YELPS]

...how low can I go?

Whoa! Whoa!

Well, you just keep popping your wheelies.

I guess you're not interested in what I got at the market.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

What-What did you get?

[LAUGHS]

I thought you weren't interested.

Of course I'm interest--

Are those, uh-- Are those paper bags?

I asked you to get plastic bags.

But-- But never mind. Did you get the tomatoes?

Of course.

Okay. Good.

Tomatoes.

These are not vine-ripened.

But they're red.

Uh...how about these peaches?

Nice, huh?

Overripe. Overripe. But, uh, hey--

Hey, they'll be fine, you know.

As long as we eat them within the hour.

Corn flakes.

Oh, Angela, I asked you to get the one

with the pieces of dehydrated fruit.

And the little toy inside?

All right, Angela. I'll eat the flakes plain.

I'll probably like 'em better.

Tony.

Just out of curiosity,

did I do anything right?

I'm sure the expiration date on the milk is good, you know.

As long as we have it with the peaches.

Bower Agency.

Hi, Mother, how's it going?

Oh, swamped with work.

[CLACKING]

So much to do, so little time.

So, what's up? How's Tony?

I'll tell you how Tony is...

He's nitpicky and obsessive

and impossible to please.

Oh, you mean like you?

No, he's much worse.

Mother, I'm about at the end of my tether.

Angela, you're giving up too fast.

Now, what is it you always tell me at work?

Stop talking on the phone?

Exactly. Got to go.

Tony...

I've thought about it, and I've decided...

I-- I think we should

just make today a day free of conflicts...

And anxiety.

I think that we should just...

have a real...fun day.

What?

I-is something wrong?

Is it the way I arranged the pillows?

Oh, no, I like the way you did it...

The new way.

A different way... But a good way.

Score one for Angela!

Tony, why are you folding the laundry?

You've got to rest while your bones are mending.

I'll get to it.

Oh, sorry.

Fold away, Angela.

All right. Okay. Whoo!

[LAUGHS]

Um, you know, this is the first weekday

that, uh...

we've ever been alone in the house together.

It's kind of, uh-- It's kind of nice, huh?

What?

Is something wrong?

You would have no way of knowing this,

but my dresser drawer goes like this,

not like that.

Yes?

Well, the way you're folding them,

I'm only going to get five rows across,

and I have to get six.

Otherwise, the extra ones

squibble down into my sock drawer.

We wouldn't want that to happen, would we?

No. No, we wouldn't.

What we would want is some appreciation

when we are trying to help someone.

Well, I do appreciate you, Angela.

You would realize there's more than one way to do something.

Yeah, there's the right way,

and then there's your way.

Do you know what you are?

You are an ingrate.

Well, excuse me for being such a burden.

I mean, hey, I didn't ask for your help.

And had you not choked in the three-legged race,

I would not be confined to this chair today.

Well, before the telethon starts,

let me leave you to your tomatoes,

your peaches, your plastic bags,

and your six rows of underwear.

She forgot the pillows.

[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey, who's the babe?

The babe happens to own the place.

Hey, wait a minute.

The redhead said she owned the place.

Mother, what are you doing?

The tango.

No--

Mother, I mean why is a party raging in my office?

What if a client walked in?

They already have. I invited them.

It's called networking.

Terrific party, Angela. Great idea.

[CHUCKLES] Well, thank you, Diane. We like to whoop it up

at the Bower Agency.

[WHOOPS]

Mother...

I need to talk to you.

Angela, you're ruining my social life.

What is it?

Tony and I had a fight.

I walked out on him. I hired a practical nurse,

but I still feel terrible.

Angela, don't you understand?

It's hard for a take-charge guy like Tony

to depend on someone else.

Now you go back home and help him.

He acts as though he doesn't even need me.

He does. He just doesn't know it yet.

Angela, go. It'll be good for you,

good for him,

and great for my party.

Stop this.

No, I don't want to dance.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Oh. Uh-oh.

♪ Rollin' Rollin', rollin' ♪

♪ Keep them dogies rollin' ♪

♪ Rawhide ♪

Mr. Micelli?

That's me.

My name's Doreen. I'm a practical nurse.

Mrs. Bower called our agency.

and asked that someone be sent right over.

Oh, well, gee, thanks for coming over,

but Mrs. Bower made a mistake. I don't need any help.

Oh, no!

W-w-wait a minute. Is it something I said?

[CRYING] It's my first day as a nurse,

and I'm a failure...

A washout.

Oh...

No, no, don't say that.

Look, come in.

Okay.

Uh, look, I don't know what's with me today.

I'm not relating well with women, you know?

Would you like to sit down?

Yeah, okay, yeah.

So, uh, you say it's your first day?

You see, I got into nursing

because I flunked out of beauty school.

I mean, how am I supposed to remember

all the different shades of nail polish?

It's a lot of pressure.

Um, well, hey,

don't you worry about a thing,

because we're gonna launch your career with a bang.

Go ahead. I'm all yours. Nurse your brains out.

You really mean it?

Sure.

I'll tell you what, why don't you start

by folding up this laundry?

Okay.

How's that?

It's perfect.

That's good. That's real nice.

Oh, Tony.

[TONY CHUCKLES]

[SIGHS] I'm so sorry about the dishwasher.

Don't worry about it, Doreen. We'll get a new one.

Okay, so, what should I work on next?

Um...how about sitting?

Eh? Come on, you could use a rest.

We both could.

Yeah...how's this?

You're a natural.

[LAUGHS] I'll tell you what.

I'll be right back, okay?

Okay.

Now, you stay where you are.

I will.

Okay. Good girl. Stay.

Okay.

I can't believe this.

Oh!

Oh, Angela! Angela, I'm so happy to see you.

You are?

Oh, yeah.

I am sorry I'm so picky about produce.

And I'm sorry I'm such an underachiever in underwear.

You know, Tony, I didn't realize it would be this hard for you.

Listen, listen.

Tony, I'm done sitting

and ready to take care of you.

Oh, hello. You must be the practical nurse.

That's me, Doreen. I do it all.

I can imagine.

No, you can't.

You must be Mrs. Bower.

Yes.

Oh, I want to thank you so much for hiring me.

Tony is an absolute doll to work for.

An absolute doll.

Yes, that's our Tony.

Uh, why are the pillows this way?

Oh, well, I knocked them over and put them back.

Why? I-is it wrong?

Doreen, what are you worried about? Just pillows.

Doesn't make any difference. Heh-heh.

It doesn't.

Mr. Laid-Back.

Yeah, he's a regular Perry Como.

Oh, uh, Mrs. Bower, I would like to explain

to you about the dishwasher.

Oh, no, Doreen, please,

allow me to explain about the dishwasher.

Why don't you go back in the kitchen?

Can do.

Okay.

Oh, Tony, don't forget,

5:00, sponge bath.

Looking forward to it.

Angela, help me.

You have all the help you need with her.

No, but I don't want her. I want you.

Well, I mean, I want you to help me.

You do?

Yes, Angela.

You have no idea what it's been like.

This girl's not a nurse, she's a walking disaster area.

She breaks dishes, she breaks dishwashers.

At 5:00, I'm going to end up getting a lethal sponge bath.

I think it's terrific, Doreen.

No, I'm really happy for you.

I think it's a wonderful career choice.

Yeah. Good luck in dental school.

Aah!

Okay, okay, goodbye.

[SIGHS]

Wait a minute, I shouldn't worry.

By the time she's through school,

I won't have any teeth.

Um, I have a surprise for you.

I-I went to the market again this morning.

Uh, peaches.

Feel.

Ooh, Angela. Fuzzy but firm.

Tomatoes.

Oh.

Vine-ripened. I'm getting misty here.

And they all came in a...

Plastic bag!

Hey Angela, you're one hell of a shopper.

[GASPS]

Hey!

Well, I studied under the master.

Hey, hey!

And now, here's your sandwich.

Ooh!

You mind if we take this into the living room?

I have something to show you.

No, of course not.

Would you do the honors?

I'd be delighted.

Thank you.

Oh!

Ha, ha!

Oh.

Tony...

You did the pillows my way.

[CHUCKLES] Well, this place could use a little change, huh?

And now...

May I?

Please.

This is delicious.

You-- You mean it?

Oh, yeah, yeah. It-- It's perfection,

the way you blended the tuna and the mayo,

smooth, but not gloppy.

And those little-- Those little...

[SMACKS LIPS] ...chunks of onion and celery,

the size of BB pellets. Oh!

This is not a sandwich, it's a work of art.

[LAUGHS] You want me to sign it?

Sam, how are they going to get Tony's cast off?

With a power saw.

Well, how do they know when to stop?

What if he hits a vein?

What if it starts gushing?

What if it squirts all over?

What if I blindfold you

and put you on the subway?

And now, ladies and gentlemen,

I give you the new, improved Tony Micelli,

with an extended warranty.

It's a miracle.

I can walk, I can run, I can jump--

Ow!

Oh, no!

What happened--

Suckers!

[♪♪♪]