Original subtitles

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY COLUMBIA PICTURES TELEVISION, INC.

♪ THERE'S A TIME FOR LOVE AND A TIME FOR LIVING ♪

♪ SO TAKE A CHANCE AND FACE THE WIND ♪

♪ AN OPEN ROAD AND A ROAD THAT'S HIDDEN ♪

♪ A BRAND-NEW LIFE AROUND THE BEND ♪

♪ THERE WERE TIMES ♪

♪ I LOST A DREAM OR TWO ♪

♪ FOUND THE TRAIL ♪

♪ AND AT THE END WAS YOU ♪

♪ THERE'S A PATH YOU TAKE AND A PATH NOT TAKEN ♪

♪ THE CHOICE IS UP TO YOU, MY FRIEND ♪

♪ NIGHTS ARE LONG, BUT YOU MIGHT AWAKEN ♪

♪ TO A BRAND-NEW LIFE ♪

♪ BRAND-NEW LIFE ♪

♪ A BRAND-NEW LIFE AROUND THE BEND ♪♪

MMM! TONY, YOUR LASAGNA'S WONDERFUL.

OH, THANKS, MONA.

EH.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, EH?

DID I SAY EH?

I MEANT MMM. IT WAS DELICIOUS.

THANKS, ANGELA.

MAYBE A LITTLE BLAND.

ANGELA, FOR YOUR INFORMATION,

MOST PEOPLE IN THE "SUPPERS FOR SENIORS" PROJECT

ARE ON LOW-SALT DIETS.

RIGHT. IT WAS A LITTLE RUNNY,

BUT IT'S DIFFICULT TO COOK IN LARGE QUANTITIES.

NOT REALLY. I COOK FOR YOU EVERY NIGHT.

WELL, SEE YOU.

YOU'LL HELP US CLEAN UP, RIGHT?

I HAVE DONE MY BIT FOR THE SENIORS.

I JOG BY THE RETIREMENT HOME IN MY TANK TOP.

SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO

IN MY OLD AGE.

[SQUEALING TIRES]

THERE HE IS AGAIN!

I'LL KILL THAT KID!

SOMEBODY COULD GET HURT.

WAIT! I WANT A PIECE OF THAT MANIAC!

HEY! GET OFF THAT PEDAL A LITTLE BIT!

THERE'S KIDS IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD! PETS!

AND SOMETIMES I PARK MY JAG IN THE STREET!

THAT KID'S DOING MACH 2

IN A 25-MILE ZONE.

GET HIS LICENSE NUMBER?

YOU BET I DID-- KL5-6218.

THAT'S OUR PHONE NUMBER.

ONLY THREE MORE LASAGNA DROP-OFFS,

AND WE'RE DONE FOR TODAY.

I JUST LOVE TALKING TO OLDER PEOPLE.

THEY'RE SO WISE.

MRS. BAYZMAN'S SEEN IT ALL.

SHE ACTUALLY REMEMBERS

THE ORIGINAL CAST OF SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE.

COMING THROUGH.

ALL RIGHT! PEDAL TO THE METAL!

BURN RUBBER! EAT MY DUST!

FINISHED PLAYING DRIVER?

WE HAVE THREE DELIVERIES LEFT.

THE LASAGNA'S GETTING COLD.

OH, LET ME DRIVE.

THE NEXT DELIVERY'S ONLY BLOCKS AWAY.

YOUR FATHER TRUSTED ME WITH HIS VAN.

NOW, SCOOT OVER.

AW, YOU'RE NO FUN.

DRIVING IS A RESPONSIBILITY.

IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE FUN.

BOY, ARE YOU STRICT.

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

IT WASN'T YOUR FAULT.

YES, IT WAS.

NO. I WAS THE ONE WHO WAS DRIVING.

I LET YOU DRIVE.

I CHARMED YOU.

YOU DIDN'T STAND A CHANCE.

CRISIS IS SUPPOSED TO BRING PEOPLE TOGETHER.

THEN WE'LL GET CLOSER AND CLOSER.

SURE YOU DON'T HAVE WHIPLASH?

WHIPLASH? THE CAR BARELY HIT US.

YOU COULD HARDLY NOTICE THE DENT.

HEY, MAYBE MY DAD WON'T EVEN SEE IT.

WHOA. WE HAVE TO TELL HIM.

I KNOW,

EVEN THOUGH I'LL BE GROUNDED FOR LIFE,

YOU AND I'LL BE THROUGH,

AND I'LL NEVER SEE BLOOMINGDALE'S AGAIN.

THAT'S IT. IT'S SETTLED.

WE CAN'T TELL HIM.

BUT IF WE LIE,

HOW ARE WE GOING TO LIVE WITH OURSELVES?

LIVE IS THE KEY WORD.

WON'T YOU FEEL ROTTEN LYING TO YOUR FATHER?

WE'D BE DOING IT FOR HIS OWN GOOD.

I READ THAT THE THREE MOST STRESSFUL THINGS

ARE THE DEATH OF A LOVED ONE, DIVORCE,

AND HAVING A DAUGHTER DRIVE A VAN

WITHOUT A LICENSE.

SAM, YOU'RE REALLY RATIONALIZING HERE.

YEAH, AND I COULD USE A LITTLE HELP.

SAMANTHA, WE HAVE TO TALK.

IT WAS ALL MY FAULT.

THEN, JESSE, I'M REALLY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU.

I RAN INTO MRS. O'RILEY.

SHE SAYS WHEN THE LASAGNA ARRIVED,

IT WAS ALL COLD AND GUMMY.

THE LASAGNA?

OH, I'M SORRY, DAD. WE REALLY BLEW IT.

IT'LL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.

OK. WHAT THE HECK.

MRS. O'RILEY'S KIND OF COLD AND GUMMY HERSELF.

WELL, I, FOR ONE, COMMEND YOU.

YOU GAVE UP A SATURDAY

TO FEED THOSE LESS FORTUNATE.

WE'RE OUT OF CONGRESSIONAL MEDALS.

WE DEVISED THIS TO SHOW YOU OUR PRIDE.

TELL THEM WHAT THEY WON.

THE CUTE COUPLE FROM FAIRFIELD

HAS WON A ROUND TRIP MOVIE FOR TWO

AT THE CINEPLEX OF THEIR CHOICE.

DO YOU HAVE MY VAN KEYS?

YEAH. RIGHT HERE, TONY.

HOLD ON TO THEM,

BECAUSE FOR TONIGHT ONLY,

YOU'VE EARNED THE RIGHT TO TAKE MY ANGEL

IN THE STYLE TO WHICH SHE'S ACCUSTOMED.

DID YOU KNOW YOUR FENDER HAS A NEW DENT?

GIVE ME THE KEYS.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

WE MEANT TO TELL YOU, BUT--

SAM, ALLOW ME.

UH, WE WERE IN A LITTLE ACCIDENT.

YOU GUYS ARE OK?

YEAH. IT WAS JUST A LITTLE BUMP.

GOOD, GOOD. WHAT HAPPENED?

IT WAS TOTALLY NOT OUR FAULT.

WE WERE AT THE CORNER

AT A STOP SIGN, TOTALLY STOPPED,

RADIO TUNED TO THE TRAFFIC REPORT.

SAM, I REALLY FEEL WE SHOULD BE HONEST.

OK. WE WERE LISTENING TO A HEAVY METAL STATION.

WE HEARD THIS SCREECH, LOOKED BACK,

AND SAW THIS BLACK CORVETTE SKIDDING TOWARDS US.

WITH A RACCOON TAIL ON HIS ANTENNA?

THAT'S THE ONE.

WE FINALLY GOT EVIDENCE

TO NAIL THAT CREEP.

YOU GOT HIS NAME?

FREDDIE SMITH.

FREDDIE SMITH...

SOUNDS LIKE A BORN TROUBLEMAKER.

ARE YOU CALLING HIS PARENTS?

NO. I'LL TAKE HIM TO COURT,

GET HIS LICENSE REVOKED.

COUNT ME IN.

WE'LL BUILD A MONUMENTAL CASE AGAINST HIM!

HE SHOULDN'T HAVE MESSED WITH MICELLI AND BOWER!

THOSE SKID MARKS, THEY'RE EVIDENCE.

GET THE CAMERA. I'LL GET THE TAPE MEASURE.

JESSE, SAMANTHA,

YOU'LL BE MY KEY PROSECUTION WITNESSES.

THIS NEIGHBORHOOD WILL KNOW WHAT HAPPENED HERE TODAY.

IN LIVING COLOR.

KNOW WHAT ELSE IS GREAT?

YOU'LL GET TO SEE

OUR JUSTICE SYSTEM IN ACTION.

HUH? ALL RIGHT!

FREDDIE SMITH.

I WONDER IF THEY LET YOU DO YOUR NAILS IN PRISON.

THERE THEY ARE--

THE WITNESSES FOR THE PROSECUTION.

DAD, YOU DON'T NEED US HERE, DO YOU?

YOU KIDDING?

YOU'RE THE MOST IMPORTANT WITNESSES HERE,

THE DRIVER AND THE PASSENGER.

THAT'S US, ALL RIGHT.

SAM, YOU'RE TURNING WHITE.

TAKE IT EASY. DON'T BE SO NERVOUS.

I'LL SOFTEN THEM UP,

YOU MOVE IN FOR THE KILL.

REMEMBER, TELL THE TRUTH.

YEAH, THE TRUTH.

JESSE, WILL YOU STOP SWEATING?

A COURTROOM'S A BAD PLACE TO LOOK GUILTY.

AND A BAD PLACE TO LIE.

OH, LOOK,

IT'S THE CORVETTE KID.

HE'LL KNOW THAT I WAS DRIVING.

I EXITED THE DRIVER'S SIDE.

HE WAS BUSY FONDLING HIS FENDER.

HEY, YOU TWO, IT WAS YOUR FAULT, NOT MINE.

NOBODY COMES TO A COMPLETE STOP AT A STOP SIGN.

DON'T TALK TO THE ENEMY, FREDDIE.

ALL RISE.

FAIRFIELD TRAFFIC COURT C-104 NOW IN SESSION.

THE HONORABLE FRANKLYN KRESHECK PRESIDING.

BE SEATED.

ALL RIGHT.

THE STATE OF CONNECTICUT VS.--

GOOD MORNING, GOOD MORNING.

WHAT A LOVELY DAY F0R A HANGING.

MADAM,

I WILL NOT TOLERATE THIS DISRUPTION IN MY COURTROOM.

KEEP YOUR ROBE ON, YOUR HONOR.

I'M SORRY I'M LATE.

I COULDN'T FIND A PARKING PLACE.

LET ME KNOW IF THE MAYOR NEEDS HIS SPOT.

ARE YOU FINISHED, MADAM?

YES. YOU MAY PROCEED.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

AS I WAS SAYING...

THE STATE OF CONNECTICUT

VS. FREDDIE SMITH, A MINOR.

PROSECUTION.

WE ASK THAT MR. SMITH'S LICENSE

BE SUSPENDED FOR RECKLESS DRIVING.

LET'S WIPE THIS GARBAGE OFF THE STREET!

OBJECTION. I DEMAND THAT SLUR BE STRICKEN

AND THE WITNESS BE SEVERELY REPRIMANDED.

WHAT SHE SAID.

NOW FOR THE DEFENSE.

I PRESUME YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY.

THE DEFENSE WILL PROVE THAT MR. SMITH

IS A GOOD DRIVER

WHO'S THE VICTIM OF UNSUBSTANTIATED CHARGES

AND SHOULD KEEP HIS LICENSE.

WHAT A CROCK OF HOOEY!

YOUR HONOR!

THE PROSECUTOR WILL CONTROL HIS WITNESS,

OR I'LL THROW THE WITNESS AND THIS CASE OUT OF COURT.

OH, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.

WILL THE PROSECUTION PLEASE CALL ITS FIRST WITNESS?

THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR.

THE STATE CALLS ANTHONY MORTON MICELLI.

MORTON.

YOU NEVER TOLD ME YOU HAD A MIDDLE NAME.

NOW YOU KNOW WHY.

YOUR HONOR.

DO YOU SWEAR TO TELL THE TRUTH

AND NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH?

YOU BET YOUR LIFE.

TRUTH IS MY MIDDLE NAME.

I THOUGHT IT WAS MORTON.

MR. MICELLI, WOULD YOU TELL US, PLEASE,

IN YOUR OWN WORDS,

EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED?

AND PLEASE BE ACCURATE.

NO PROBLEM.

LET ME SEE, UH...OK.

IT WAS THE 12th OF THIS MONTH AT 2:41 P.M.

I WAS MAKING CHOCOLATE CAKE

WHEN I HEARD A SCREECH.

I SAW A BLACK CORVETTE, DRIVEN BY ONE FREDDIE SMITH,

CAREENING AROUND THE CORNER.

MRS. McCAFFERTY CROSSED THE STREET WITH HER WALKER.

SHE HASN'T MOVED THAT FAST

SINCE THE PIT BULL MOVED IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD.

I YELLED, "STOP!" HE HAD THE NERVE TO...

PICK UP ANGELA'S PINK BLOUSE AND--

THAT'S THE WRONG PAGE. EXCUSE ME.

BEFORE WE GET TO ANGELA'S SKIVVIES,

PLEASE GET ON WITH IT.

I'M SORRY, YOUR HONOR.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I ASK YOU--

DO WE WANT DANGEROUS DRIVERS IN OUR COMMUNITY?

I SAY NO. WE WANT A NEIGHBORHOOD

WHERE KIDS FEEL FREE TO RUN AND JUMP,

WHERE THE ELDERLY FEEL FREE TO STROLL,

WHERE DOGS FEEL FREE TO...

DO DOG THINGS.

YOUR WITNESS.

MR. MICELLI, LET ME START BY COMMENDING YOU

ON THAT MOVING AND, WELL, ELOQUENT SPEECH.

WHAT CAN I SAY?

I'VE GOT THE GIFT FOR GAB.

NOW, MR. MICELLI, YOU'RE, WHAT, IN YOUR 30s

AND OBVIOUSLY A VERY HEALTHY INDIVIDUAL.

I TRY TO WORK OUT REGULARLY.

OH... AND IT'S PAID OFF,

IF I MAY SAY SO.

YOU MAY.

I REMIND YOU THIS IS A COURT OF LAW,

NOT A SINGLES' BAR.

I ASSURE YOU THIS LINE OF QUESTIONING

IS LEADING UP TO SOMETHING.

THAT'S WHAT I'M AFRAID OF.

MAY I ASSUME, MR. MICELLI,

THAT YOU, BEING A YOUNG AND HEALTHY MAN,

HAVE FAIRLY GOOD EYESIGHT?

20-20.

PERFECT PEEPERS.

AND YET, EVEN WITH THOSE PERFECT PEEPERS,

YOU NEVER GOT THE CORVETTE'S LICENSE NUMBER.

IT WAS MOVING TOO FAST.

CAN YOU BE SURE IT WAS A CORVETTE?

IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN AN MX MISSILE.

CAN YOU BE SURE IT WAS ALWAYS THE SAME CAR?

YES, BECAUSE THERE WAS A RACCOON TAIL ON THE ANTENNA.

IS THIS IT?

YES, THAT'S IT.

WRONG. I GOT THIS AT THE CAR WASH TODAY.

NO FURTHER QUESTIONS.

I KNOW IT WAS THE SAME CAR.

SHE TWISTED THE THING AROUND.

YOUR HONOR,

MR. MICELLI'S TESTIMONY PROVES ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

YOU MAY STEP DOWN.

WHAT IS THIS, A KANGAROO COURT?

MR. MICELLI...

HOP AWAY!

YOUR HONOR, THE STATE CALLS

THE DRIVER OF THE VAN,

JESSE NASH.

OK, GO GET HIM.

IT'S ALL UP TO YOU NOW.

IT'S UP...

DO YOU SWEAR TO TELL THE TRUTH?

UH, THAT'S A TOUGHIE.

MAN HAS BEEN SEARCHING FOR TRUTH FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS.

WE'D LIKE TO FIND IT BEFORE LUNCH.

YES.

JUST LIKE A REGULAR COURTROOM.

SIT DOWN.

JESSE, I DON'T WANT TO EMBARRASS YOU,

BUT YOU'RE A STRAIGHT-A STUDENT, CORRECT?

YES. WELL, I DID ONCE GET A B-PLUS IN ALGEBRA.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR COMPLETE HONESTY.

JESSE,

YOU WERE DRIVING MR. MICELLI'S VAN

AT THE TIME THAT IT WAS STRUCK, CORRECT?

DRIVING IN WHAT SENSE?

DRIVING, MR. NASH! YOU KNOW...

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.

WELL, YOU KNOW, I WAS IN THE VAN.

I GUESS YOU COULD KIND OF SAY I--

STOP! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE.

JESSE, I CAN'T LET YOU DO THIS.

I WAS DRIVING THE VAN.

SAMANTHA!

WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

"STOP, I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE.

JESSE, I CAN'T LET YOU DO THIS."

I KNOW WHAT WE SAID.

SAMANTHA, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS?

YOUR HONOR,

DO YOU HAVE A WITNESS PROTECTION PROGRAM?

HEY, EVERYBODY, HOW DID IT GO?

WE WON.

BOY, I NEVER KNEW

WINNING COULD MAKE YOU SO DEPRESSED,

BUT THEN AGAIN,

WE ALWAYS LOSE, AND I'M HAPPY.

WELL, OFF TO THE SLAUGHTER.

YEAH....

TONY, YOU HAVEN'T SAID A WORD SINCE THE TRIAL.

NO, BUT THAT LITTLE VEIN ON HIS TEMPLE

IS DOING SITUPS.

DAD, DON'T DO THIS TO ME.

PLEASE SAY SOMETHING, ANYTHING.

YOU CAN'T SEE JESSE ANYMORE.

ANYTHING BUT THAT.

NO, SAM, HE'S RIGHT.

TONY, YOU PUT A LOT OF TRUST IN ME.

I LET YOU DOWN.

I WAS IMMATURE AND IRRESPONSIBLE AND DUMB.

I'M REALLY SORRY.

AH, JESSE, THAT WAS REALLY NICE.

I COULDN'T HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF.

NOW GET OUT.

I GUESS THIS IS IT.

I'LL MISS YOU.

GOODBYE, SAM.

BYE, JESSE.

SEE YOU AT SCHOOL TOMORROW.

DAD, I'M SORRY.

THIS IS ABSOLUTELY THE WORST THING I'VE EVER DONE.

I KNOW.

YOU LIED, YOU BROKE THE LAW,

AND YOU COULD HAVE GOTTEN YOURSELF HURT.

NOBODY'S PERFECT.

I HOPE YOU DON'T HATE ME.

I DON'T HATE YOU,

BUT I'M VERY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU.

I DON'T KNOW IF I'LL EVER BE ABLE TO TRUST YOU AGAIN.

WHAT?

NOTHING.

IT'S WHAT YOU HAD TO DO.

JUSTICE, UNTEMPERED WITH MERCY, HAS BEEN SERVED.

JESSE AND SAMANTHA GOT EVERYTHING THEY DESERVE.

TONY, DON'T WE ALL HAVE A COUPLE OF SKELETONS

IN OUR TEENAGE CLOSET?

WHAT'S YOURS, DEAR,

LEAVING THE CAP OFF OF YOUR CLEARASIL TUBE?

OH, MOTHER, THAT'S HOW MUCH YOU KNOW.

WHEN I WAS 16,

JANE BARTH AND I BOUGHT FAKE I.D. CARDS

AND WENT TO THE BOOM-BOOM ROOM.

THE BOOM-BOOM ROOM?

THAT NIGHTCLUB'S THE BIGGEST PICKUP JOINT IN TOWN.

I KNOW.

YOU USED A FAKE I.D. TO GET INTO A BAR?

THAT'S ILLEGAL. I AM AGHAST.

I AM IMPRESSED.

OH, WHAT AN ADVENTURE.

I HAD MY FIRST REAL DRINKS, TWO GRASSHOPPERS.

I DANCED WITH A 24-YEAR-OLD SAILOR,

AND ON THE WAY OUT, I THREW UP ON MY PUMPS.

BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE.

TONY, WE ALL DO NAUGHTY THINGS WHEN WE'RE KIDS.

IT'S GOOD PRACTICE FOR WHEN YOU'RE OLDER.

YOU REMEMBER WHEN YOU STOLE THOSE STREET SIGNS?

YEAH, THE STREET SIGNS.

THAT'S NOT AS BAD AS THE TIME I--

NEVER MIND.

COME ON. WHAT, WHAT, WHAT?

NO, NO. IT'S-- IT'S TOO EMBARRASSING.

LET'S FORGET IT AND HOPE THE POLICE HAVE,

AND THE COAST GUARD.

THE COAST GUARD?

JUST SOME FROGMEN AND A MINE SWEEPER.

HEY, NOBODY GOT HURT.

BOY, WAS MY OLD MAN MAD.

I'LL NEVER FORGET IT.

IT WAS ON MY BIRTHDAY.

I WAS SUPPOSED TO GET THIS BEAUTIFUL BIKE

FROM SEARS-ROEBUCK.

I LOVED THAT BIKE.

WHAT HAPPENED?

MY FATHER WAS ALL OVER ME,

AND THEN HE CHEWED ME INSIDE OUT AND...

THEN HE GAVE ME THE BIKE.

DAD, I NEED TO TALK TO YOU.

COME ON, ANGELA.

SAY, IS THE BOOM-BOOM ROOM STILL OPEN?

YOU KNOW HOW YOU SAID

YOU MAY NEVER BE ABLE TO TRUST ME?

WELL, SAM, YOU KNOW, NEVER...

NEVER'S A LONG TIME, YOU KNOW.

UH, WELL, I WAS UPSTAIRS THINKING,

AND I CAME TO A DECISION.

I'M GOING TO WIN YOUR TRUST BACK.

YOU KNOW, IT COULD TAKE A WHILE.

I'M YOUNG.

I'VE GOT TIME.

HEY, SAM, LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION.

SO HOW DID YOU LIKE DRIVING

FOR THE FIRST TIME IN YOUR LIFE?

IT WAS GREAT.

THAT'S WHAT I WAS AFRAID OF.

[THEME FROM DRAGNET PLAYS]

FREDDIE SMITH WAS CONVICTED OF RECKLESS DRIVING.

HIS LICENSE WAS TEMPORARILY SUSPENDED.

HE WAS FORCED TO DELIVER SUPPERS FOR SENIORS

ON HIS SKATEBOARD.

JESSE NASH HAD HIS LICENSE SUSPENDED

FOR ALLOWING AN UNLICENSED DRIVER

TO OPERATE A VEHICLE.

HE WAS GIVEN VISITATION RIGHTS TO SAMANTHA MICELLI

ONE DAY A WEEK, THREE HOURS, UNDER MAXIMUM SECURITY.

SAMANTHA MICELLI CANNOT APPLY FOR HER DRIVER'S LICENSE

UNTIL THREE MONTHS AFTER HER 16th BIRTHDAY.

SHE WAS GROUNDED FOR SIX WEEKS

AND BANNED FROM THE CLEARANCE SALE AT BLOOMINGDALE'S.

ANGELA BOWER WAS SENTENCED

TO TWO WEEKS WITHOUT CHOCOLATE CAKE

FOR MAKING FUN OF HER HOUSEKEEPER'S MIDDLE NAME,

MORTON.

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