All language subtitles for Saint Maud 2021 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP5 1 H 264-Kitsune (1)_track3_[eng]

Dear God,

watch over me as I embark
on this next posting.

Think I'll have to get up
at about 6:00 tomorrow.

The pain
in my stomach persists

and is now further hampered
by menstruation.

I've taken two ibuprofen
and milk of magnesia.

Forgive me my impatience,

but I hope you will reveal
your plan for me soon.

I can't shake the feeling
that you must have saved me

for something
greater than this.

Not that I'm complaining
or anything.

Amen.

- Hi. Are you Maud?
- Yes. Hi.

So, I left some notes
out on the kitchen table

with all of her bits.

She has a mate
coming over tomorrow,

but try and keep her
off the sauce.

Doctor's just started her
on a new course of B12 shots,

so she's having one of those
every evening before dinner.

Mmm-hmm.

Your bedroom is just
upstairs on the left.

Her majesty's in there
having a nap.

How is she?

Bit of a cunt.

Have fun.

Amanda Kohl.
Forty-nine years old.

Can you feel that?

Stage 4 lymphoma
of the spinal cord.

Yep. Yeah. Yeah.

I dare say you'll
be seeing this one soon.

You feel that?
Uh-huh.

We done?

Mmm-hmm.

What time would you
like dinner this evening?

8:00.

There is a shopping list
on the hall table.

Mmm-hmm.

I got it.

I looked her up
before I came here.

Dancer. Choreographer.
Minor celebrity.

As you know, I have
little time for creative types

as they tend to be
rather self-involved.

What are you
cooking up in there?

Spaghetti Bolognese
and garlic bread.

Splendid.

Is that temperature
all right?

Mmm, it's fine.

Oh, hello.

Who's your saint?

Mary Magdalene.

I didn't know
they made necklaces of her.

I ordered it online.

You're prettier
than the last one.

Hey.

What do you think?
It's good.

You must be Mary.
No, Maud.

Hope we're not turfing
you out, are we?

No, no. I'm going
to meet a friend...

Good, good.

Cheerio, then.

I should have told her

I'd have been happy
just to stay in my room.

She must be embarrassed.

Can you spare
some change, please?

Sorry, mate,
I ain't got nothing.

Fuck off, then.

Excuse me, miss?

Can you spare
some change, please?

Thank you, love.

Bit, er...
Bit nippy out, innit?

May God bless you
and never waste your pain.

What?
Nothing.

God bless you, too,
sweetheart.

Why would
someone like her

end up in a town like this?

This dump can't appeal to her
any more than it does to me.

Hello?

Oh, what's happened?

Come back to London!

You can't just lock yourself
up in here.

You should be around people!

Why the fuck do you
care so much all of a sudden?

Darling,
don't be petulant.

You're getting dangerously
Norma Desmond...

Oh, fuck you!

Stupid cow!

Hello.
Hello.

Sorry to call you back early.

Silly old thing used to
knock it back no problem.

Even I couldn't
keep up with her.

Well, things
are different now.

Yes.
Yes, of course.

Do you, um,
need me to do anything?

No.

She'll be all right?

Oh, don't be an idiot,
Richard.

Sorry.

Take care of yourself,
darling.

Pompous asshole.

You should've seen him
way back when.

He was constantly
trying to fuck me.

He has plugs now, though,
did you see them?

No.
No?

Well, no one sees
what they don't want to.

Mmm.

Stay with me.

I don't wanna be alone.

How long have
you been doing this?

Just over a year.

What were you doing before?

I worked at
St. Afra's hospital.

Horrible place.

Have you seen
a lot of death?

Yes.

What made you leave?

I don't know.
I just needed a change.

I don't know...

I was spread too thin.

And it's what God wanted.

When He came,
everything changed.

So, this is
a recent conversion?

When you pray,
do you get a response?

Sometimes He talks.

You hear His voice?

Most of the time,
it's just

like He's physically in me
or around me.

It's how He guides me.

Like when He's pleased,
it's like a...

A shiver, or sometimes
it's like a pulsing.

And it's all warm and good.

And He's just there.

Nothing feels real anymore.

Ever since I've moved
back here,

I keep thinking about
that last moment,

and wondering

what it will be like.

What will I be looking at?

Will there be
anyone else there?

And then what?

Nothing?

Tell me I'm wrong.

There is more.

And not just afterwards.

He's everywhere.

He sees you.

He won't let you fall.

My little savior.

Father.

Thank you.

And bring your hand,
to join your right hand.

And then draw a semi-circle
above your head.

Now, don't get me wrong,
palliative care is noble work.

But I always knew you had
something more planned for me.

It takes nothing special
to mop up after the decrepit

and the dying.

But to save a soul,

that's quite something.

Your presence graces the air

and I feel fuller of your love
than ever before.

More than enough to share.

Oh.

I can see you.

Yes?

Cynthia left.
Yes. I'm Maud.

Carol.

It's too late
to be visiting now.

She's expecting me.

She's sleeping.

Maud!

Come and join me!

Dear God.

Here is Amanda.

Well, you know that.

Thank you for bringing us
together, Lord,

and thank you for this meal
which we gratefully receive.

Bless Amanda's body,

which is hurting now

but has done
so many wonderful things.

And bless her mind

which is shrouded in darkness.

And reach out to her,
like you did to me.

Amen.

He's here?

I feel it, too.

You look beautiful.

No.

Yes.

Hey.

No, I can't tonight.

You know where I am.

She's all right.

Bit weird, but...

Shh, I gotta go.

Yeah, okay. Bye. Bye.

Maud, your face!

Oh, shit!

Fuck. It's all over
my dressing gown.

Shit.

Maud, I can do it.

Don't let her drink too much.

Don't worry.
It's mostly for me.

Honey!
Come back to me!

"Religious themes
would play a prominent role

"throughout Blake's career.

"Namely a rejection
of organized religion.

"Which he claimed
was an ugly distortion

"of a true spiritual life."

Hmm.

Bye.

Carol.
Hey.

I need to talk to you.

Yeah?

What's up?

I want you to stop
seeing Amanda.

Huh?
Just leave her alone.

Did she tell you
to come after me?

No. I'm telling you.

It's an important time
for her right now.

She's got big things
to deal with

and she needs to be focused.

And I just don't think
you can fit into that anymore.

I don't know what
you're talking about,

but I'm pretty sure
your patient's sex life

is none of your business.

I know she's
giving you money.

Again,
none of your fucking business.

Look, I'm trying
to be respectful.

I didn't swear at you
or anything, I just...

I just don't think
it's a good idea...

Please. Respectful?

If you don't like
that she fucks women,

that's your problem.
Listen, Carol,

you could have an
eight-inch cock for all I care

and I'd still
be telling you this

after the way you looked
at her last night.

Whoa! What?

What was that,
by the way?

Do you think
you're too good for her?

Do you think
this is just a joke?

Of course not.
Amanda is dying.

I have a responsibility
to look after her.

This is life and death.

It's spiritual.
On another level.

But no feelings.
I'm sure you're great in bed,

but really,

you're just a waste
of her time at the moment.

Can you hear yourself?

Maud, you're her nurse.

She doesn't
want you to see it,

but she is vulnerable
right now,

and it is not right
that she spends

her last days
getting worked up

about a silly girl
who doesn't care about her.

I care about her.
Not enough.

What are you doing?

I'm leaving.

Oh.

Okay, so you'll do it?

Anything you say, Maud.

Don't tell her
I told you, though.

Just, you know,
make something up.

Don't hurt her feelings.

Okay.

Okay.

I think it went well.

A whole day
and her phone has been silent.

It must be a relief
to her, too.

She radiates peace,

and I am reminded of myself

in the first flushes
of your love.

We don't
need anyone else.

Katie?

Katie?

Katie, hey.
I thought that was you.

How's it going?
It's been ages.

Yeah, good.

How are you, Joy?

Yeah, not bad.
Not bad, you know.

Knackered. Got patients
sleeping in the corridors,

surgeries all double-booked.
It's a total madhouse.

So, how's it going?
You taking care of yourself?

Yeah.

We all thought you must
have left town or something.

Not seen you out
and about anymore.

I've been around.

Oh, yeah?
What you up to?

I'm a private carer.

You're still nursing?

What?

Nothing.
I'm just surprised. I mean...

Sorry, where are you
doing it? Who with?

A private agency.

And they know what happened?
Yes.

Well, I've gotta go.
It was nice to see you, Joy.

Katie!

Take my number, yeah?

What?

If you ever wanna talk
or get a drink or anything.

That one there.

Yes, and then that one.

Oh. You...
You can't do that.

What?

You... You slipped
those cards in.

Did I?

It's no fun if you cheat.
Which one was it?

Mmm, that one...

Can you give me a moment?

Oh. Yes.
And take that away.

Ooh! Can I have
a cup of tea?

Of course.

Hello.

I didn't expect
to hear from you.

Wha...
What do you mean?

Why?

There you go.

You know,
I've been thinking

it might be nice
to go out some time.

To the theater
or something.

I'd have no clue
what to see

but I'm sure you could
suggest something.

Maybe after I...
I want to go to bed.

It's 5:00.

I will go to bed
when I damn well like.

Yes, of course.

Now's not the time.

I need you to go
into town for me.

Yeah?

To pick up some things
for tonight.

I'll make a list.

Okay, no problem.

Oh, yes!

I am out of here!

Is it ready?

I'm just lighting
the candles.

Plates.

Get the lights!

♪♪ Happy birthday to you

♪♪ Happy birthday to you

♪♪ Happy birthday, dear Amanda

♪♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪

Lights.

So, Carol,
how did you and Mandy meet?

We met online.

Ah, so now you
have a menage a trois?

Hardly.

Maud doesn't like Carol.

It's funny.
I can't figure out

if she's a bigot
or if she's just jealous.

You know, she went
sneaking behind my back

to try to scare
Carol away?

To save my soul,
if I understand correctly.

Excuse me.

Don't run away.
I'm talking to you.

Maud is my savior,
you see.

She's been
looking out for me in more ways than one,

but you got a little
carried away, didn't you?

So, what is it?

Am I indecent?

No. You're lost.

There's my little saint!

Oh, no, no.
Sweetheart, no, no,

you know you shouldn't take
anything I say seriously.

I just wanna see you
loosen up.

You're a beautiful
young woman

and you should have some fun
while you still can.

I've got more important
things on my mind.

Oh, yes. Of course.

Well, how could
mere human frivolity

possibly compete
with the heavenly Father's

warm, hard, pulsing...

Let's go.
Let's go.

Maybe if you just
let me talk to her...

No. Absolutely not.

You should be thankful
she isn't pressing charges.

Ms. Kohl expressed
some other concerns.

Is everything all right?

I'm fine.

God,

all I feel of you now
is this pain.

A gnawing, burning...

Maybe it's ulcers or cancer
or appendicitis.

If you're trying
to teach me something,

I can't see what it is.

Quite frankly, it all
just seems such a waste.

I was ready and open
and alive,

and this is my reward?

Unemployable. Unoccupied.

Perhaps you aren't
as wise as I thought.

Perhaps I wasn't paying
enough attention.

I can't help but feel
an act of spite has occurred.

If this is how you treat
your most loyal subjects,

I shudder to think what awaits
those who shun you.

Yeah, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Oh. Oh.

Oh.

Not yet.

Oh, sorry. Oh.

See you later.

Hey, er, Joy, it's Katie.

Hey. Yeah, well, I...

I was just wondering if
you wanna go for that drink.

You know, have that chat
and just hang out.

I'd like to chat.

Cool. Great. That's great.

Well, you know,
if I am honest with you,

I did think
it was kinda weird

when I saw you
and you suggested it,

just because you never seemed
to like me that much.

Mmm... No, no, no.

No, I didn't...
I didn't mean...

Don't be like that.

Well, I'm just at the Star

at the moment with,
erm, some friends,

but I think they're,
like, heading off soon.

But I'm going
to hang around a bit.

Oh, sorry.

Yeah, of course.

Well, in that case,
erm, my apologies.

I'm... I'm pretty stupid,
so, bye.

Careful.

Sorry. Sorry.

Whoa.

You owe me a drink.

Okay.
Oh, my God.

Don't move.

Whoa.

Is everything okay?

Shh. It's okay, it's okay.

Come on.

Easy.

No.
Easy.

I remember you,
you know.

You used to be out
all the time.

While back.

I think...

You and my mate Tommy
had it off.

Ah, I remember you.

That lovely,
lovely little nursey, eh?

I did everything.

Everything.
I changed, didn't I?

I thought I did what you
told me to do, didn't I?

Please.

Please don't let
me fall again.

I'm begging you.

I'll do anything.

Please guide me.

Revelation.

And just in time.

O Lord, your mercy
knows no bounds.

For shame that I almost fell
so easily.

I should have
expected resistance.

Nothing worthwhile
comes easily.

Amanda.

Amanda, Amanda.

You called to me, Amanda.

It was no small thing.
It meant something.

Never waste your pain.

Never waste your pain.

Beautiful.

Mmm.

Do you mind if I sit?

Mmm, 'course not.

Oh. You don't work
at St. Afra's, do you?

Oh, no, no.
I'm a private carer.

Oh, right.

I just have a friend
who works at St. Afra's,

and I wondered
if you knew her.

Oh, their uniform's blue.

I honestly have
so much respect

for anyone
in the medical profession,

like, any area.

I really think
it's the most important thing

you can do
with your life.

Almost.

Thank you.
That's so sweet.

Yeah, it can be
really rewarding.

Not all that glamorous,
but, yeah,

I love it.

I bet you get no time
for yourself, though?

Oh, it's fine.
I have my own life, my own things.

Got choir practice.

So, this person
you're with at the moment,

what's wrong with them?

Oh...

I'm not really supposed
to discuss the details.

But do you have
a good relationship?

You get on with them?
Mmm. Really well.

I'm with a lovely lady
at the minute, actually.

We're good pals.

That's one of the things
I love about the job.

You find yourself
quickly building

these quite
meaningful relationships.

You know,
you're often right there

at a very important time
in peoples' lives.

Although that sometimes makes
things harder in the end.

When you have to leave?

Oh, no. When they die.

I don't think I'll be
with this one much longer,

to be honest with you.

Sadly,

that, as they say
is how the cookie crumbles.

Oh, erm,
I'm Esther, by the way.

What's your name?

What if
I'm getting it all wrong?

What if you are smirking,
or indifferent,

or think me a clueless idiot
like that stupid woman?

Is that how Amanda
saw me all along?

How will I know what to do?

Katie?

Katie, it's Joy.

There you are!

Sorry, did I get you
out of bed?

Mind if I come in?

I'm busy.
I'll be quick, I promise.

I'm just on my way to work.

Thanks, love.

Oh.

This is nice.

Cor, you ain't
half tidy, are you?

I hope you don't mind.
I got your address from work.

Just wanted to see
how you are.

Oh. This is cool.

I like all this.

Sorry I couldn't
see you the other night, by the way.

I was so shattered,

I don't think I'd have
been much fun,

to be honest with you.

I tried to call
but you didn't pick up.

Want a ciggy?

How's work going?

You not with a patient
at the moment?

I've been feeling
really bad

about the way I reacted
last time I saw you.

I'm sure you're doing
a great job. You always did.

And I know you put
a lot of pressure on yourself.

What happened before,
it wasn't your fault,

I know that.

You do, too, right?

What's going on,
Katie?

Come on,
you can tell me.

Look, I know
it's a bit late now,

but I wanted
to tell you...

I wanted to say
that we should have been there

before it all happened.

We could see you were
struggling for a while

and no one
did anything.

I know it feels
like everyone's

in their own little bubble.

But it does help to share.

May the Lord bless
and keep you, Joy.

You what?

It was sweet of you to come,
but you mustn't worry.

You're right.
Back then, I was so lost.

But now I am transformed.
And soon, everyone will see.

Right. Well,
that's good.

Thank you, Joy.

Thank you for coming.

Oh! Oh, right.

Are you sure
you're okay, then?

Oh, fuck.
I should go actually.

I'm gonna
come back later. All right?

All right.

I'm really glad
things are looking up.

See you later.

I'm so sorry
I was unkind to you.

You made me
think of things I didn't want to.

It's all right.

It is, Amanda.

The Lord forgives
that which is said in anger.

He knows your heart.

The Lord?

Yes. God.

God sent me to you.

He forgives everything.

You only have to ask.

Heavenly Father,

bless this woman
in her pain. No!

No. None of
that nonsense.

Amanda?

You must be
the loneliest girl I've ever seen.

I'm here, Amanda.

I am not alone.

And neither are you.

No.

Snap out of it, honey.

He isn't real.

You must know that.

No. You felt Him, too,
remember?

We both did.

No, honey.

I didn't.

That's not true.

You have no idea
how dull it is to be dying.

I hate to be the one
to break it to you,

but it's just
you and me here.

Nothing you do matters.

Well, that was easy.

Devil!

Take some responsibility

for your actions.

You came back here
because you are alone.

If you were a true believer,
He would be enough.

But it's clear now.
You are as weak as your faith.

♪♪ I saw the light

♪♪ I saw the light

♪♪ No more...

♪♪ Now I'm so happy

♪♪ No sorrow in sight

♪♪ Praise the Lord

♪♪ I saw... ♪

Somebody stop her!
Hey, love!

Someone
please help her. Oh, my God!

Oh, my God!
No, no, no. Don't!