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1
00:00:07,590 --> 00:00:09,090
I know it's
the off-season here,
2
00:00:09,090 --> 00:00:11,090
but there's got to be
something more interesting
3
00:00:11,090 --> 00:00:13,600
than sitting around
staring at each other.
4
00:00:13,600 --> 00:00:16,100
Can anybody do this?
5
00:00:20,100 --> 00:00:24,110
No, I can't do that, but, um...
I can do this--
6
00:00:24,110 --> 00:00:26,110
(clears throat)
7
00:00:26,110 --> 00:00:28,610
One, two. One, two.
8
00:00:28,610 --> 00:00:31,110
One, two, two, one.
Two, one!
9
00:00:31,110 --> 00:00:32,620
Three, three, three.
10
00:00:32,620 --> 00:00:35,120
Huh? Huh?
11
00:00:35,120 --> 00:00:36,120
Huh?
12
00:00:36,120 --> 00:00:38,120
Oh, please,
that's nothing.
13
00:00:38,120 --> 00:00:39,620
Listen to this.
14
00:00:39,620 --> 00:00:43,630
(hand-farting
"Yankee Doodle Dandy")
15
00:00:47,630 --> 00:00:49,130
Wow.
16
00:00:54,140 --> 00:00:55,140
Good for you, Roy.
17
00:00:55,140 --> 00:00:57,140
You can make your hands poot.
18
00:00:59,640 --> 00:01:02,650
Oh, uh, Budd, do you have
any strange talents
19
00:01:02,650 --> 00:01:05,650
like crossing your eyes
or wiggling your ears?
20
00:01:07,150 --> 00:01:09,150
Uh... no.
21
00:01:22,170 --> 00:01:23,670
The airport, please.
22
00:01:23,670 --> 00:01:25,670
My pleasure.
23
00:01:25,670 --> 00:01:27,170
You know, sir...
24
00:01:27,170 --> 00:01:30,670
I could drive you
right to the airport, but,
25
00:01:30,670 --> 00:01:33,180
um, if you're not
in a big hurry
26
00:01:33,180 --> 00:01:35,680
I could give you
my deluxe tour of the island
27
00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:40,680
where I show you the sights,
explain their colorful history
28
00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:42,690
and then end
with a rousing medley
29
00:01:42,690 --> 00:01:45,190
of award-winning show tunes.
30
00:01:45,190 --> 00:01:47,690
So, what's your name?
31
00:01:47,690 --> 00:01:49,690
Antonio Scarpacci.
32
00:01:49,690 --> 00:01:51,190
Paesano, huh?
33
00:01:51,190 --> 00:01:54,700
Si, si. Vengo da un piccolo
villagio vicino a Napoli.
34
00:01:54,700 --> 00:01:55,700
E lui?
35
00:01:55,700 --> 00:01:57,200
Me? I'm from Sicily.
36
00:01:57,200 --> 00:01:58,200
Ah...
37
00:01:58,200 --> 00:02:00,700
So, how's America
treating you, Antonio?
38
00:02:00,700 --> 00:02:03,210
Eh, it's the land
of opportunity...
39
00:02:03,210 --> 00:02:07,210
unless it's winter on Nantucket,
and you're a cab driver.
40
00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:10,210
Then it's an unforgiving,
barren wasteland
41
00:02:10,210 --> 00:02:12,220
of desperation and despair.
42
00:02:14,220 --> 00:02:17,720
So, how's our little island
treating you?
43
00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:18,720
I like it.
44
00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:19,720
It's quiet.
45
00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:22,730
Nobody bothers me.
46
00:02:22,730 --> 00:02:24,730
Listen,
may I speak frankly?
47
00:02:24,730 --> 00:02:25,730
Eh, certainly.
48
00:02:25,730 --> 00:02:27,230
When I came to this country
49
00:02:27,730 --> 00:02:29,730
I was a poor schnook
like you.
50
00:02:29,730 --> 00:02:31,730
No disrespect intended.
51
00:02:31,730 --> 00:02:33,240
None taken.
52
00:02:33,740 --> 00:02:35,240
But I was lucky.
I met someone
53
00:02:35,240 --> 00:02:38,240
who took me under his wing and
showed me the ropes.
54
00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:39,240
You were lucky.
55
00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:42,250
The first guy I met
took me under the pier
56
00:02:42,250 --> 00:02:43,750
and showed me...
57
00:02:48,250 --> 00:02:51,250
Let's talk about you. Uh...
58
00:02:51,250 --> 00:02:53,260
Wh-What business are you in?
59
00:02:53,260 --> 00:02:54,760
Import-export.
Ah!
60
00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:56,260
What do you import-export?
61
00:02:56,260 --> 00:02:58,760
A little of this,
a little of that.
62
00:02:58,760 --> 00:03:03,770
Well, at least it's something
people always need.
63
00:03:03,770 --> 00:03:07,270
Antonio, I
know we've just met,
64
00:03:07,270 --> 00:03:11,270
but I pride myself on being
a good judge of character.
65
00:03:11,270 --> 00:03:16,280
So, before we drive past
the airport yet one more time,
66
00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:19,280
let me ask you
a question.
67
00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:21,280
How would you like
to come to work for me?
68
00:03:21,280 --> 00:03:22,290
Well...
69
00:03:22,290 --> 00:03:23,790
I'd make it
worth your while.
70
00:03:23,790 --> 00:03:25,790
How does 500 sound?
71
00:03:25,790 --> 00:03:27,290
Are you serious?
72
00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:30,290
Do you know how many fares
it would take me
73
00:03:30,290 --> 00:03:32,300
to make $500 a week?
74
00:03:32,300 --> 00:03:34,800
I meant 500 a day.
75
00:03:34,800 --> 00:03:36,800
500 a day?!
(tires screech)
76
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:38,800
(horn honks)
77
00:03:38,800 --> 00:03:43,310
Well, if that's
your best offer...
78
00:03:43,310 --> 00:03:44,810
Do we have a deal?
79
00:03:44,810 --> 00:03:46,310
Are you kidding?
80
00:03:46,310 --> 00:03:48,810
I-I only have one question.
81
00:03:48,810 --> 00:03:50,810
Who do I have to kill?
82
00:04:05,330 --> 00:04:06,830
Oh, my God.
83
00:04:06,830 --> 00:04:08,330
Do you know who
that woman is?
84
00:04:08,830 --> 00:04:09,830
BRIAN:
Oh, no.
85
00:04:09,830 --> 00:04:10,830
It is her.
86
00:04:10,830 --> 00:04:12,840
How the hell
did she find us?
87
00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:14,340
The albino must
have ratted us out.
88
00:04:14,340 --> 00:04:15,840
Of course.
89
00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:17,840
What are you talking about?
90
00:04:17,840 --> 00:04:19,340
We don't know.
We're bored.
91
00:04:19,340 --> 00:04:21,340
It's the off-season.
92
00:04:21,340 --> 00:04:23,850
That's Mrs. Bennett.
93
00:04:23,850 --> 00:04:25,850
Of course, it's Mrs. Bennett.
She's back.
94
00:04:25,850 --> 00:04:28,350
(foreign accent):
She was the one
in Istanbul.
95
00:04:29,350 --> 00:04:31,860
Are you done?
96
00:04:31,850 --> 00:04:33,360
Yes.
97
00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:36,860
But it ain't over,
not by a long shot.
98
00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:37,860
So, uh...
99
00:04:37,860 --> 00:04:39,360
who's Mrs. Bennett?
100
00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:41,360
Oh, she was my senior
English teacher, and I
101
00:04:41,360 --> 00:04:43,870
don't want her to see me,
not after what I did to her.
102
00:04:43,870 --> 00:04:44,870
What?
What did you do?
103
00:04:46,370 --> 00:04:47,370
I didn't read Don Quixote
104
00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:49,870
and I got a D-minus
on the final exam.
105
00:04:49,870 --> 00:04:52,380
Well, you are just
pure evil, you are.
106
00:04:52,380 --> 00:04:54,380
No, you don't understand.
107
00:04:54,380 --> 00:04:56,880
She was my idol
in high school.
108
00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:59,380
I'll never forget
the last words
she said to me--
109
00:04:59,380 --> 00:05:02,890
"Helen, I am
so disappointed in you."
110
00:05:03,390 --> 00:05:04,890
I can't go over there
and face her.
111
00:05:04,890 --> 00:05:05,890
Well, I don't know what
you're worried about.
112
00:05:06,390 --> 00:05:07,390
She's not even going
to know it's you.
113
00:05:07,890 --> 00:05:10,390
The last time she saw you, you
were a big, fat tub of goo.
114
00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:16,400
And now you're not.
115
00:05:18,900 --> 00:05:20,900
Yeah, maybe she
doesn't know who I am.
116
00:05:20,900 --> 00:05:22,910
No, not unless you say,
"I'm Helen Chappel."
117
00:05:22,910 --> 00:05:24,410
You're right.
118
00:05:24,410 --> 00:05:26,910
She won't recognize me.
119
00:05:26,910 --> 00:05:27,910
Thanks, honey.
120
00:05:27,910 --> 00:05:28,910
Ow!
121
00:05:28,910 --> 00:05:30,410
That was for that
"tub of goo" crack.
122
00:05:34,420 --> 00:05:36,420
Hi. Sorry to keep you waiting.
123
00:05:36,420 --> 00:05:37,920
Can I help you?
124
00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:40,420
May I have a cup of coffee
to go, please, miss?
125
00:05:40,420 --> 00:05:41,420
Miss?
126
00:05:41,420 --> 00:05:42,930
Yeah, that's me-- miss.
127
00:05:42,930 --> 00:05:44,430
Uh, coming right up.
128
00:05:45,930 --> 00:05:46,930
Hey, Helen,
129
00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:49,430
this letter
was delivered
to Sandpiper
130
00:05:49,430 --> 00:05:50,930
by mistake,
but it's addressed to you.
131
00:05:50,930 --> 00:05:51,930
Okay, great.
Thanks, Budd.
132
00:05:51,930 --> 00:05:53,940
Least I think it's to you.
133
00:05:53,940 --> 00:05:55,940
It's, uh, addressed
to Helen Chappel.
134
00:05:55,940 --> 00:05:57,440
It's your
maiden name, right?
135
00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:58,940
Chappel.
136
00:05:58,940 --> 00:05:59,940
Yeah.
137
00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:03,950
Such an English-sounding name--
Chappel.
138
00:06:03,950 --> 00:06:06,450
(English accent):
"Hello. I'm Helen Chappel.
139
00:06:06,450 --> 00:06:09,950
I'll have a blueberry scone
and a spot of tea."
140
00:06:11,450 --> 00:06:13,460
You're Helen Chappel?
141
00:06:13,460 --> 00:06:15,960
Yeah.
142
00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:16,960
I'm Claire Bennett.
143
00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:19,960
You used to be in
my English lit class, remember?
144
00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:21,960
Now, what's
different about you?
145
00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:23,970
Is that a new shade of lipstick
146
00:06:23,970 --> 00:06:26,970
or did you drop
a hundred pounds?
147
00:06:28,970 --> 00:06:30,470
Well, both.
148
00:06:30,470 --> 00:06:33,480
Listen, Helen, I'm going to be
on the island for a few days.
149
00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:35,980
Why don't we get together
for lunch and catch up?
150
00:06:35,980 --> 00:06:37,980
Lunch? You and me?
151
00:06:37,980 --> 00:06:38,980
Yes.
152
00:06:38,980 --> 00:06:41,480
Is, uh, is Thursday okay?
153
00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:42,990
Thursday's great.
154
00:06:42,990 --> 00:06:44,490
See you then.
155
00:06:46,490 --> 00:06:49,490
And don't disappoint me.
156
00:07:04,010 --> 00:07:08,510
Oh, my goodness,
Antonio, look at you.
157
00:07:08,510 --> 00:07:10,010
That's some set of
threads.
158
00:07:10,010 --> 00:07:12,010
What did that set you back?
159
00:07:12,010 --> 00:07:16,520
Oh, please, Roy, it's
so tacky to talk about money.
160
00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:19,520
It's-It's the
style, the elegance.
161
00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:23,530
That's what you look for
in a $2,500 suit.
162
00:07:23,530 --> 00:07:25,530
Boy, did you
get ripped off.
163
00:07:25,530 --> 00:07:26,530
What?
164
00:07:26,530 --> 00:07:29,030
This baby
only cost me 49 bucks.
165
00:07:29,030 --> 00:07:31,030
Not only that,
I'm saving the planet
166
00:07:31,030 --> 00:07:33,040
'cause it's made
from recycled tires.
167
00:07:34,540 --> 00:07:36,540
Fay, would you mind...?
168
00:07:36,540 --> 00:07:38,540
Antonio?
169
00:07:38,540 --> 00:07:41,040
BRIAN:
Look at you.
170
00:07:41,040 --> 00:07:42,550
Look at you.
Joe, are you
looking at him?
171
00:07:42,550 --> 00:07:43,550
I'm looking at him.
172
00:07:43,550 --> 00:07:46,550
Haven't you ever seen
me in a $2,500 suit?
173
00:07:46,550 --> 00:07:49,550
I've never seen you
in a $2,500 car.
174
00:07:51,050 --> 00:07:53,060
H-How can you afford a...?
175
00:07:53,060 --> 00:07:54,560
I'll tell you
how he can afford it.
176
00:07:55,060 --> 00:07:57,560
You're being kept by old
Mrs. Fimmel, aren't you?
177
00:07:57,560 --> 00:07:59,560
She always did have
her good eye on you.
178
00:07:59,560 --> 00:08:00,560
(chuckles)
179
00:08:00,560 --> 00:08:02,070
It's nothing like that.
180
00:08:02,570 --> 00:08:04,070
I just changed jobs.
181
00:08:04,070 --> 00:08:05,570
My cabby days are over.
182
00:08:05,570 --> 00:08:07,070
No more hauling people around--
183
00:08:07,070 --> 00:08:09,070
you know, "take me here,
take me there."
184
00:08:09,070 --> 00:08:10,570
Well, what
are you doing?
185
00:08:10,570 --> 00:08:12,080
I'm a chauffeur.
Oh.
186
00:08:12,070 --> 00:08:13,580
JOE:
Antonio, I...
187
00:08:13,580 --> 00:08:16,580
I still don't know how
you can afford a $2,500 suit.
188
00:08:16,580 --> 00:08:19,080
Eh, I don't know
what all the fuss is about.
189
00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:20,080
It's only a week's pay.
190
00:08:20,080 --> 00:08:24,090
What? You make $2,500
a week as a chauffeur?
191
00:08:24,090 --> 00:08:25,090
Who are you driving?
192
00:08:25,090 --> 00:08:26,590
It's-It's a businessman.
193
00:08:26,590 --> 00:08:27,590
His name is DeCarlo.
194
00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:29,590
What kind
of business is he in?
195
00:08:29,590 --> 00:08:31,090
Import-export.
196
00:08:31,090 --> 00:08:32,090
What does he
import and export?
197
00:08:32,090 --> 00:08:34,600
Little of this,
little of that.
198
00:08:34,600 --> 00:08:36,100
Uh... Wait a minute.
199
00:08:36,100 --> 00:08:38,100
DeCarlo?
200
00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:41,100
Import-export, little
of this, little of that?
201
00:08:41,100 --> 00:08:43,610
Antonio, are you sure
this is on the up-and-up?
202
00:08:43,610 --> 00:08:46,110
What are you talking about?
Oh, I see. I see.
203
00:08:46,110 --> 00:08:49,610
Just because Mr. DeCarlo's
Italian, pays me in cash
204
00:08:49,610 --> 00:08:51,610
is secretive
about his business...
205
00:08:51,610 --> 00:08:54,120
you assume he's a mobster.
206
00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:56,620
Well, you couldn't
be more wrong.
207
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:59,620
Brian, a little
personal space, please.
208
00:09:01,120 --> 00:09:04,130
Antonio, uh, are you sure
209
00:09:04,130 --> 00:09:05,630
that, uh... you know
what you're getting into?
210
00:09:05,630 --> 00:09:06,630
(chuckles)
211
00:09:07,130 --> 00:09:09,130
You know what's your problem?
You watch too many movies.
212
00:09:09,130 --> 00:09:11,130
All right, fine.
But just don't be surprised
213
00:09:11,130 --> 00:09:12,640
when he starts making
you call him godfather.
214
00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:14,140
Don't be ridiculous.
215
00:09:14,140 --> 00:09:15,640
He's a regular guy.
216
00:09:15,640 --> 00:09:17,640
I call him what
everyone else does--
217
00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:18,140
Don.
218
00:09:28,150 --> 00:09:29,650
Yes.
219
00:09:29,650 --> 00:09:31,150
He's coming in tonight.
220
00:09:31,150 --> 00:09:33,160
I want you
to take care of him.
221
00:09:33,160 --> 00:09:35,660
I don't want
any excuses.
222
00:09:35,660 --> 00:09:37,660
I said take care of him.
223
00:09:37,660 --> 00:09:39,660
(hangs up)
224
00:09:39,660 --> 00:09:41,160
Uh...
225
00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:42,670
everything okay?
226
00:09:42,670 --> 00:09:45,170
Just a little family matter.
227
00:09:45,170 --> 00:09:47,670
Little family matter.
228
00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:49,670
Uh-huh.
229
00:09:49,670 --> 00:09:51,670
I see.
230
00:09:51,670 --> 00:09:53,680
Okay.
231
00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:57,680
Tell me-- does your family
do much ti...
232
00:09:57,680 --> 00:10:00,180
uh, spend much time together?
233
00:10:00,180 --> 00:10:01,680
You're a curious guy...
234
00:10:01,680 --> 00:10:04,190
just like my last driver.
235
00:10:04,190 --> 00:10:06,190
He was a curious guy, too.
236
00:10:06,190 --> 00:10:09,690
Being a curious guy,
I just have to ask--
237
00:10:09,690 --> 00:10:14,700
whatever happened
to that other curious guy?
238
00:10:14,700 --> 00:10:17,700
Paulie was with me for 15 years.
239
00:10:17,700 --> 00:10:20,200
I loved him like a son.
240
00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:22,710
It broke my heart
when he bought the farm.
241
00:10:22,710 --> 00:10:25,710
Bought the farm?
242
00:10:25,710 --> 00:10:28,210
Uh-huh.
243
00:10:28,210 --> 00:10:29,710
I see.
244
00:10:29,710 --> 00:10:31,710
Okay.
245
00:10:31,710 --> 00:10:34,220
Accident, huh?
246
00:10:34,220 --> 00:10:35,220
No accident.
247
00:10:35,220 --> 00:10:37,220
I arranged it myself.
248
00:10:37,220 --> 00:10:39,220
I didn't want to,
but...
249
00:10:39,220 --> 00:10:41,720
when he decided
not to work for me anymore
250
00:10:42,220 --> 00:10:43,730
I had no choice.
251
00:10:43,730 --> 00:10:45,730
Uh-huh.
252
00:10:45,730 --> 00:10:47,230
I see.
253
00:10:47,230 --> 00:10:50,230
(strained):
Okay.
254
00:10:50,230 --> 00:10:53,740
But that won't happen with us...
255
00:10:53,740 --> 00:10:56,240
will it, Antonio?
256
00:10:56,740 --> 00:10:58,740
Uh-uh.
257
00:11:03,250 --> 00:11:04,750
Morning, Chappel.
258
00:11:05,750 --> 00:11:07,250
Chappel, what are
you doing?
259
00:11:07,750 --> 00:11:09,250
Oh, I'm reading
Don Quixote.
260
00:11:09,250 --> 00:11:11,750
Oh, Don Quixote, huh?
261
00:11:11,750 --> 00:11:15,260
I saw that book.
262
00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:17,260
It was at a dinner theater.
263
00:11:17,260 --> 00:11:19,260
Dick Van Patten
on a horse, right?
264
00:11:19,260 --> 00:11:21,760
Listen to this, Roy...
265
00:11:21,760 --> 00:11:24,270
"My heart is wax molded
as she pleases
266
00:11:24,270 --> 00:11:27,270
but enduring
as marble to retain."
267
00:11:27,270 --> 00:11:29,770
Do you know
what that means?
Well, do you?
268
00:11:29,770 --> 00:11:31,770
What the hell
does that mean?
269
00:11:31,770 --> 00:11:33,280
I've been reading
600 pages of this.
270
00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:34,780
I still don't know
what's going on.
271
00:11:34,780 --> 00:11:37,280
And Miss Bennett's going to be
at my house in a few hours.
272
00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:38,280
Hold on, I'm going
to help you out here.
273
00:11:38,780 --> 00:11:40,280
This is how it ended
when I saw it.
274
00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:42,280
Van Patten did a big number.
275
00:11:42,280 --> 00:11:43,790
Then he got whacked
in the head with a windmill,
276
00:11:43,790 --> 00:11:45,290
then they served the veal.
277
00:11:47,790 --> 00:11:48,790
Brian?
278
00:11:48,790 --> 00:11:50,290
What is wrong with me?
279
00:11:50,290 --> 00:11:52,290
My boobies won't dance.
280
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,300
Brian, Joe...
281
00:11:55,300 --> 00:11:56,300
BRIAN:
Oh!
282
00:11:56,300 --> 00:11:58,800
Now you, mister,
283
00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:01,300
are looking for trouble
in a suit like that.
284
00:12:01,300 --> 00:12:03,810
Hey, uh, Antonio...
285
00:12:03,810 --> 00:12:05,810
About the other day,
I'm really sorry.
286
00:12:05,810 --> 00:12:08,310
I jumped to all kinds of
conclusions about your boss.
287
00:12:08,310 --> 00:12:09,810
I was way out of line.
288
00:12:09,810 --> 00:12:10,810
DeCarlo's a mob guy.
289
00:12:10,810 --> 00:12:11,810
I was right!
I knew it!
290
00:12:11,810 --> 00:12:13,320
When are you going
to listen to me?
291
00:12:13,320 --> 00:12:14,820
What am I
going to do?
292
00:12:14,820 --> 00:12:16,320
What do you mean,
what are you gonna do?
293
00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:18,320
You're gonna get out
as fast as you can.
294
00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:19,320
Oh, plea...
And do what?
295
00:12:19,320 --> 00:12:20,820
Go back
to being a cabby?
296
00:12:20,820 --> 00:12:24,330
Putting in 60-hour weeks,
working for the man?
297
00:12:24,330 --> 00:12:25,830
Lining his pockets...
298
00:12:25,830 --> 00:12:28,330
Antonio,
you're self-employed.
299
00:12:28,330 --> 00:12:32,840
Well, you know,
not every analogy works.
300
00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:34,340
What am I going to do?
301
00:12:34,340 --> 00:12:36,840
Brian, what do
you think?
302
00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:39,340
You know where I stand.
303
00:12:39,340 --> 00:12:41,340
Look, Antonio,
you know this is wrong.
304
00:12:41,340 --> 00:12:43,350
You've got to get out
as quick as you can.
305
00:12:43,350 --> 00:12:44,350
I can't get out.
306
00:12:44,350 --> 00:12:46,850
When his last driver
tried to get out
307
00:12:46,850 --> 00:12:48,350
Mr. DeCarlo had him killed.
308
00:12:48,350 --> 00:12:50,350
Right. May I
say something here?
309
00:12:50,350 --> 00:12:52,350
When is the next time you're
going to see DeCarlo?
310
00:12:52,350 --> 00:12:53,860
Ah, he's coming to
the island tonight.
311
00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:56,360
Okay, great.
When he comes here,
you just tell him
312
00:12:56,860 --> 00:12:59,360
that Joe and I offered
you a better job.
313
00:12:59,360 --> 00:13:03,870
And he won't
kill me because...?
314
00:13:03,870 --> 00:13:06,370
Because you've only been
working for him for a week.
315
00:13:06,370 --> 00:13:09,370
And this other guy's been
working for him for 15 years.
316
00:13:09,370 --> 00:13:10,370
Yeah, that's right.
317
00:13:10,370 --> 00:13:12,370
I mean, this other guy
knew everything
318
00:13:12,370 --> 00:13:13,380
about his operation
319
00:13:13,380 --> 00:13:15,880
but you, I mean-- what do
you know? Nothing.
320
00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:17,380
That's right!
321
00:13:17,380 --> 00:13:18,380
I know nothing!
322
00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:19,880
I'm too stupid to kill.
323
00:13:19,880 --> 00:13:21,380
I'd be a waste
of a bullet.
324
00:13:21,380 --> 00:13:22,890
Exactly.
325
00:13:22,890 --> 00:13:24,390
Wait, wait.
326
00:13:24,390 --> 00:13:25,890
What if it
doesn't work?
327
00:13:25,890 --> 00:13:29,390
Promise me you'll have
an open casket.
328
00:13:29,390 --> 00:13:32,390
I got to say good-bye
to that suit!
329
00:13:40,400 --> 00:13:44,410
"...whose credit this tale
of my genuine Don Quixote
330
00:13:44,410 --> 00:13:46,410
"has already shaken
and which will
331
00:13:46,410 --> 00:13:50,910
"without a doubt,
soon tumble to the ground.
332
00:13:50,910 --> 00:13:52,420
"Farewell.
333
00:13:52,410 --> 00:13:54,420
The end."
334
00:13:54,420 --> 00:13:55,920
Not a clue.
335
00:13:57,420 --> 00:13:59,420
(doorbell rings)
336
00:14:04,930 --> 00:14:05,930
Oh, hi, Miss Bennett.
337
00:14:05,930 --> 00:14:07,430
I'm so glad
that you could make it.
338
00:14:07,930 --> 00:14:09,930
Please, call me Claire.
339
00:14:09,930 --> 00:14:10,930
Okay.
340
00:14:10,930 --> 00:14:12,940
Ooh, lovely place
you have here.
341
00:14:12,940 --> 00:14:15,940
Oh, thank you... Claire.
342
00:14:15,940 --> 00:14:16,940
Um, please sit down.
343
00:14:16,940 --> 00:14:19,440
We have so much
to talk about.
344
00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:21,440
We certainly do.
345
00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:22,440
So, catch me up.
346
00:14:22,440 --> 00:14:24,450
What have you been doing
since high school?
347
00:14:24,450 --> 00:14:26,450
Oh, well, I started
my own business.
348
00:14:26,450 --> 00:14:28,950
I got married,
and I read Don Quixote.
349
00:14:28,950 --> 00:14:31,450
How wonderful.
Tell me all about it.
350
00:14:31,450 --> 00:14:33,460
Well, he was a Spanish knight
351
00:14:33,460 --> 00:14:35,460
who fought windmills and
lived in a dream world.
352
00:14:35,460 --> 00:14:37,960
No. I meant your husband.
353
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:41,460
Oh, uh... he's
a local yokel named Joe.
354
00:14:41,460 --> 00:14:42,970
Can I get you some wine?
355
00:14:42,970 --> 00:14:45,970
What a lovely idea.
356
00:14:45,970 --> 00:14:48,970
You know,
speaking of ideas, um...
357
00:14:48,970 --> 00:14:51,970
even though Don Quixote
was written 400 years ago
358
00:14:51,970 --> 00:14:53,480
I believe that the theme
359
00:14:53,980 --> 00:14:57,480
of a man following his dreams
is relevant today.
360
00:15:00,980 --> 00:15:03,990
On the other hand,
I could be wrong.
361
00:15:03,990 --> 00:15:06,490
I know what
you're thinking.
362
00:15:06,490 --> 00:15:08,490
"Claire, how on earth
363
00:15:08,490 --> 00:15:10,990
is red wine going
to come out of silk?"
364
00:15:10,990 --> 00:15:13,500
That was one thing
I was thinking.
365
00:15:13,500 --> 00:15:16,000
Well, you can kiss
those worries good-bye,
366
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:18,000
thanks to...
367
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:21,000
Real-Way spot remover.
368
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,510
We'll just spray
a little on.
369
00:15:26,510 --> 00:15:28,010
Give it a minute.
370
00:15:28,010 --> 00:15:31,010
And the stain will magically
be lifted out
371
00:15:31,010 --> 00:15:35,020
by the patented Real-Way
amino action.
372
00:15:39,020 --> 00:15:41,020
Okay.
373
00:15:41,020 --> 00:15:43,030
Well, that's good to know.
374
00:15:43,030 --> 00:15:44,530
So, um...
while we're waiting
375
00:15:44,530 --> 00:15:47,030
on that amino action
to kick in
376
00:15:47,530 --> 00:15:50,530
um... let's talk about
the action in chapter 56
377
00:15:50,530 --> 00:15:51,530
when Don Quixote...
378
00:15:51,530 --> 00:15:55,040
Oh, my God!
379
00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:57,040
That's exactly how I used
to react
380
00:15:57,040 --> 00:15:59,040
to unexpected
household spills,
381
00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:01,040
but then I discovered...
382
00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:04,550
Real-Way rug
and carpet cleaner.
383
00:16:04,550 --> 00:16:05,550
So, uh...
384
00:16:06,050 --> 00:16:08,050
where do you keep
your fine linens?
385
00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:10,050
Hold it
one second.
386
00:16:10,050 --> 00:16:13,060
First of all,
I don't have any fine linens.
387
00:16:13,060 --> 00:16:14,560
And second of all, what?
388
00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:16,560
Did you come here
to sell me cleaning products?
389
00:16:17,060 --> 00:16:18,560
Of course not.
390
00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:21,060
These products sell themselves.
391
00:16:21,060 --> 00:16:24,070
But what about Don
Quixote and windmills?
392
00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:30,570
Windmills, windows, windshields,
this puppy cleans 'em all!
393
00:16:30,570 --> 00:16:33,080
I thought you were a teacher.
394
00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:34,580
I was a teacher...
395
00:16:34,580 --> 00:16:36,580
until a Real-Way representative
396
00:16:36,580 --> 00:16:40,080
knocked on my door one day
and changed my life.
397
00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:44,090
Now I live the Real-Way... way.
398
00:16:45,090 --> 00:16:46,090
Forget it.
399
00:16:46,090 --> 00:16:47,090
Oh...
400
00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:49,590
I cannot believe
I spent four days
401
00:16:49,590 --> 00:16:54,100
slogging through 900 pages
of Don "the snooze" Quixote
402
00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:56,100
'cause I respected you.
403
00:16:56,100 --> 00:16:57,600
I cannot
believe that
404
00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,100
I even cared what you thought.
405
00:16:59,100 --> 00:17:01,100
I cannot believe...
406
00:17:01,100 --> 00:17:04,610
that this stain is gone.
407
00:17:04,610 --> 00:17:07,110
Poof! Like magic.
408
00:17:07,110 --> 00:17:08,610
This is amazing.
409
00:17:09,110 --> 00:17:11,110
Maybe I should get a bottle.
410
00:17:11,110 --> 00:17:13,120
Just a bottle?
411
00:17:13,120 --> 00:17:14,620
Oh, Helen.
412
00:17:14,620 --> 00:17:18,620
I'm so disappointed in you.
413
00:17:20,620 --> 00:17:22,620
A case?
414
00:17:22,620 --> 00:17:25,130
Just a case?
415
00:17:25,130 --> 00:17:28,130
A case of everything?
416
00:17:35,140 --> 00:17:36,140
Antonio,
would you sit down?
417
00:17:36,140 --> 00:17:38,140
I can't sit down.
I'm too nervous.
418
00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:39,640
Why am I so nervous?
419
00:17:39,640 --> 00:17:41,140
'Cause you're working
for a mob guy.
420
00:17:41,140 --> 00:17:42,650
Your life's not worth
a plugged nickel.
421
00:17:44,150 --> 00:17:45,650
Hey, Antonio, there you are.
422
00:17:45,650 --> 00:17:46,650
Let's go.
423
00:17:46,650 --> 00:17:49,150
Excuse me,
Mr. DeCarlo.
424
00:17:49,150 --> 00:17:50,150
I'm Joe Hackett.
425
00:17:50,150 --> 00:17:51,650
This is my brother Brian.
426
00:17:51,650 --> 00:17:52,650
We own Sandpiper Air.
427
00:17:52,650 --> 00:17:54,660
Good for you.
Shall we, Antonio?
428
00:17:54,660 --> 00:17:56,660
Uh, no, Mr. DeCarlo,
my friends
429
00:17:56,660 --> 00:17:58,660
uh, want to discuss
something with you.
430
00:17:58,660 --> 00:18:00,160
Yes?
431
00:18:00,660 --> 00:18:02,160
Uh...
432
00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:04,670
Mr. DeCarlo...
433
00:18:04,670 --> 00:18:07,670
you are a businessman.
434
00:18:09,670 --> 00:18:12,170
I am a businessman.
435
00:18:14,180 --> 00:18:18,180
You are a man of honor.
436
00:18:18,180 --> 00:18:20,180
I am a man of honor.
437
00:18:20,180 --> 00:18:21,680
Joe, please.
438
00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:25,690
Uh... Mr. DeCarlo...
439
00:18:25,690 --> 00:18:28,690
we mean you
no disrespect...
440
00:18:28,690 --> 00:18:30,690
because you
are a man
441
00:18:30,690 --> 00:18:34,700
of... respect...
442
00:18:34,700 --> 00:18:38,200
as we are all
men of respect.
443
00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:39,700
And you got
to respect that.
444
00:18:39,700 --> 00:18:41,200
Brian.
445
00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:44,210
Mr. DeCarlo, in business,
there are times
446
00:18:44,210 --> 00:18:48,710
when businessmen should sit down
and do business...
447
00:18:49,210 --> 00:18:51,210
What the hell are you
talking about?
448
00:18:51,210 --> 00:18:54,220
Joe... it's time to stop
saying stupid stuff.
449
00:18:54,220 --> 00:18:55,720
Yes, all right.
All right.
450
00:18:55,720 --> 00:18:58,720
We have offered
Mr. Scarpacci
451
00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:01,720
a position
in our organization.
452
00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:03,230
But Antonio
works for me.
453
00:19:03,230 --> 00:19:04,730
We know that.
454
00:19:04,730 --> 00:19:08,230
Which is why we came
to you,
455
00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:10,230
Don DeCarlo...
456
00:19:10,230 --> 00:19:11,230
on this day...
457
00:19:13,740 --> 00:19:16,740
with all honor...
458
00:19:16,740 --> 00:19:18,240
and respect...
459
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:20,240
to, uh...
460
00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:21,740
Uh, to... to...
461
00:19:21,740 --> 00:19:23,250
ask for your blessing
462
00:19:23,250 --> 00:19:25,750
in...
463
00:19:25,750 --> 00:19:27,250
releasing...
releasing...
464
00:19:27,250 --> 00:19:30,250
...Mr. Scarpacci
on this day.
465
00:19:30,250 --> 00:19:31,750
So what you're
telling me
466
00:19:31,750 --> 00:19:34,260
is that you're trying
to steal my employee away,
467
00:19:34,260 --> 00:19:36,760
because if that's what
you're telling me
468
00:19:36,760 --> 00:19:38,260
that would make me
very unhappy.
469
00:19:38,260 --> 00:19:40,260
Is that what
you're telling me?
470
00:19:40,260 --> 00:19:42,260
He said it, not me.
471
00:19:42,260 --> 00:19:45,270
All we're saying is that
Antonio should...
472
00:19:45,270 --> 00:19:46,770
Should...
Should what?
473
00:19:46,770 --> 00:19:49,770
Should thank
his lucky stars
474
00:19:49,770 --> 00:19:52,770
on this day,
that he has you for a boss.
475
00:19:52,770 --> 00:19:54,780
So then our business
here is done.
476
00:19:54,780 --> 00:19:55,780
Done. Finished.
477
00:19:55,780 --> 00:19:56,780
Never happened.
478
00:19:56,780 --> 00:19:57,780
DeCARLO:
Come on, Antonio.
479
00:19:58,280 --> 00:19:59,280
No, no.
Wait, wait.
480
00:19:59,280 --> 00:20:00,780
I-I-I can't.
481
00:20:00,780 --> 00:20:03,290
I can't stay with you,
Mr. DeCarlo, because...
482
00:20:03,290 --> 00:20:05,290
I don't want to work
for a gangster.
483
00:20:05,290 --> 00:20:05,790
What?
484
00:20:05,790 --> 00:20:06,790
Okay. It'd be
485
00:20:06,790 --> 00:20:08,790
my honor to work
for a gangster. Let's go!
486
00:20:09,290 --> 00:20:10,290
A gangster?
487
00:20:10,290 --> 00:20:11,790
Is that what you think?
488
00:20:11,790 --> 00:20:13,800
I treated you like a son
489
00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:15,800
and this is how
you repay me?
490
00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:18,800
It's time I showed
491
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:23,310
you people how I do business.
492
00:20:27,310 --> 00:20:29,310
Oh, my God.
493
00:20:29,310 --> 00:20:31,810
There's got to be...
494
00:20:31,810 --> 00:20:33,820
a million dollars in diamonds
in there!
495
00:20:33,820 --> 00:20:35,320
Yeah, and who else
but a gangster
496
00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:36,820
would carry around
a fortune in diamonds?
497
00:20:36,820 --> 00:20:39,320
A diamond broker.
498
00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:41,320
Oh... yeah! Yeah.
499
00:20:41,320 --> 00:20:43,830
Well, sure,
that could work, too.
500
00:20:43,830 --> 00:20:45,330
W-Wait a second.
501
00:20:45,830 --> 00:20:47,830
Are you saying
you're not in the mob?
502
00:20:47,830 --> 00:20:49,830
Of course not.
503
00:20:49,830 --> 00:20:53,340
B-B-But I heard you
on the phone
504
00:20:53,340 --> 00:20:57,340
saying to someone
t-t-to take care of some guy.
505
00:20:57,340 --> 00:20:58,840
That was the maitre d'.
506
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:00,840
I was trying to get my
cousin a good table.
507
00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:02,840
What about your last
driver, Paulie,
508
00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:05,350
the one who... the one
who "bought the farm"?
509
00:21:05,350 --> 00:21:06,350
What does that mean?
510
00:21:06,350 --> 00:21:09,350
It means he bought a farm.
511
00:21:10,850 --> 00:21:12,350
He bought
a little dairy farm
512
00:21:12,350 --> 00:21:13,860
in upstate New York.
513
00:21:13,860 --> 00:21:15,360
It was his dream.
514
00:21:15,360 --> 00:21:16,360
God!
515
00:21:16,360 --> 00:21:20,360
Why didn't you just tell me
what you did?
516
00:21:20,360 --> 00:21:23,370
Hey, I'm carrying around
a fortune in diamonds.
517
00:21:23,370 --> 00:21:26,370
I didn't know
if I could trust you.
518
00:21:26,370 --> 00:21:28,870
So now that you know
that you can
519
00:21:28,870 --> 00:21:31,870
we could just put
this ugliness behind us.
520
00:21:31,870 --> 00:21:34,380
Yes, we can.
521
00:21:34,380 --> 00:21:36,380
Ciao, Antonio.
522
00:21:37,380 --> 00:21:39,380
Wait, wait, wait.
523
00:21:39,380 --> 00:21:41,880
I still have three suits
on layaway.
524
00:21:49,890 --> 00:21:51,390
Wow.
525
00:21:51,390 --> 00:21:53,400
Phew, huh?
526
00:22:00,900 --> 00:22:02,400
WOMAN:
Taxi!
527
00:22:10,410 --> 00:22:12,410
The airport, please.
528
00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:20,420
My, that's a beautiful suit.
529
00:22:20,420 --> 00:22:22,420
(voice breaking):
Thank you.
530
00:22:22,420 --> 00:22:24,930
It's all I've got left.
35710
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