Original subtitles

♪

- (metal clattering) - Fuck's sakes!

I'll remember that!

Shit!

(horn honking)

Sorry Rita, I missed your wave.

Oh, that?

I didn't even notice!

Yeah, okay then, take care!

Okay, you too!

See you.

(engine departing)

♪

♪ 'Cause I can love you Baby ♪

♪ All night long ♪

♪

Okay!

I don't want anybody fuckin' around

when we get to Winnipeg!

Yeah!

We're goin' straight to the Red River Ex.

No bullshittin'!

Sorry I'm a little late.

Took you so long, man!

Let's kick the tires

- and light the fires! - Can you not?

I'm just havin' a day.

I can't wait to get to the deep fry pit.

Last year, they deep fried

a whole jar of peanut butter.

So what did you bring for the fry yourself truck, bro?

Nothin'. I'm all about the feature.

They're gonna deep fry a whole milkshake.

We're talkin' cup, lid, straw,

- um, the whole deal. - That's risky, man.

I've got this right here.

Cheesecake, bro.

That's money!

What's goin' on, how come we haven't left?!

Oh, I was ironing my khakis.

A Brady man, you look freaked out.

You doin' okay?

Ah, I don't like these old planes.

Thing looks like it's 100 years old!

Ha, come on, Brady.

Planes don't have birthdays!

Just don't be freaked out.

I won't be freaked out.

I took a sleeping pill.

That's a weird move, man.

Trip's only like, an hour.

What's up your arse, bro?

You get to fly a plane all damned day.

You wouldn't understand, you're just a kid.

(scoffs) As if.

You're 30?

Two words:

Exfoliate.

All right, then.

What's the difference between a TFSA and an RRSP?

You don't pay taxes on the TFSA.

- Mm. - But with an RRSP,

you're locked the fuck in.

Well, apologies to you, ma'am.

Nah, man.

I'm hella flattered.

All right, listen.

If we're being real with each other?

I lost a shit-tonne of money betting on the dog races,

and if my wife finds out, she's gonna kill me.

I get it, man.

Of course, you're 30.

And if we're being honest with each other?

It's not even my wife

that's the worst of my problems.

I got a dog bookie who handles all my dog bets,

and if he doesn't get paid--

- He'll sic his dogs on you? - Yeah.

Been there.

Paul: Hey, what's goin' on, are we takin' off, or what?!

Yeah, yeah, hang on!

Here's what I'm thinkin':

I'll place another dog bet when we get over

into the internet pocket, right over barracks.

The only way out of a gambling slump is to keep gambling.

Ah-- exactly!

Go big or go home, bro!

Oh, fuckin' right!

Okay, ladies and gentlemen.

One hour to Winnipeg,

buckle up and enjoy the flight.

- Ah. - Ah!

Hey Brady!

Cool kids in the back seat!

Yeah, I'm a cool baby.

What?!

- I'm not a baby. - Okay.

(chuckling)

Just a head's up: I talk a lot

on planes.

Rose hates it.

Okay, great.

Last time,

she was sawin' logs two minutes in.

You're not gonna fall asleep on me though, eh?

No, no, I...

I hate sleeping.

Same! (laughing)

I wish I could skip it!

Plus all the work I have to do.

Sorry, am I boring you?

Oh, no, no, no, no, that's my neck.

I, uh...

Was watching a live tennis match.

In Grouse Lake?

Yep, mm hmm.

Anyways.

Last time I took a day off,

Chief Deedee bought a horse.

I take one day off,

and she buys a horse!

What the heck is goin' on?!

It's like my bros on W Street say:

Buy low, sell high. (phone chiming, chirping)

We're in the internet pocket.

Hold the yoke for a sec,

- I'm gonna make a call! - Fuckin' sick, for real?!

Yeah, you got this, right? You're 30!

'Course, bro.

Hello?!

Yeah, hey! Give me two grand

- on Fast and the Furry Legs! - Bookie: Two grand...

Uh yeah, in the next wiener dog race.

- Bookie: Okay. - Two grand?

- Bookie: You got it. - Yeah, why?

How much you down?

Twenty-five.

Wow.

Yeah.

"Go big or go home," right?

Yeah, put me down for 25 grand...

- Bookie: Twenty-five grand. - On the Fast

and the Furry Legs.

(phone chiming)

It's cousin Leon.

He's at the fry barrel, and he said

it's the biggest line he's ever seen.

For real?! Fuckin' Leon!

I told you he's a scammer!

I'll get him to buy us three milkshakes,

- just in case they sell out. - He'd better.

(phone chimes)

Okay, he's gonna do it.

But he needs 60 bucks.

All right, all right.

I'll send it!

Can't wait to eat that lid, bro.

There, sent. (exhales sharply)

He'd better not fuck us.

(phone buzzing) He's calling!

- What's up?! - Bookie: Sorry, man, you lost.

- What?! - Bookie: Yeah, you lost.

- Fuck! - Bookie: Yeah.

He lost?!

- Yeah, that's what I'm saying. - Holy shit!

Nooo...!

No, no, no!

Nooo...!

- Oh God! - Harsh, bro.

You just lost 50 Gs!

(gasping)

It's okay, it's okay.

(laughing maniacally)

It's okay, it's okay.

It's okay, it's okay. (exhales shakily)

Oh, I haven't asked you about you, yet!

Is this your first time going to the Ex?

(yawning loudly)

I'm not actually going to the Ex.

Why not?

I have to go to Winnipeg.

To sign my divorce papers.

You're married?

(snoring)

Did you guys know Brady was married?

Nah, man.

Nah!

But I know he took a sleeping pill.

We should stick his hand in some water

until he pee-pees himself.

- No! - Two against one.

Heather!

Put that thing down!

I thought we were trying to work things out!

We're cruising at an altitude of...

I don't know, fuck, but it's awesome!

Fifty grand.

Like sand, through my hands.

Yeah.

Would've been better if you'd fucked with an RRSP.

I mean, sure,

it's a slow build, but it's the safest gamble

- out there. - Yeah, but I don't want

safe, man!

I thought we were on the same page!

We are, bro!

So you know what I'm gonna say.

That the only way out is to bet my way out!

Fuckin' right!

So go back?

Can I?

In the pocket?

Are we really doin' this?

We're really doin' this.

(cackling)

(plane engine revving)

Pilot: Woo-hoo! (giggling)

What the hell?!

We're turning around?!

We are?

Oh-- we totally are!

What the hell are you doin' up there?!

Don't mess with my milkshake!

Pilot: Hello, everyone, this is your captain saying

there's going to be a slight change in our flight path.

We had to adjust for a flock of birds up ahead.

But don't worry, we'll be in Winnipeg

before you know it.

I don't see any birds!

We're gonna miss the deep fry?

We never miss it!

Un-real.

Did you know that I got my first hickey

from a grease splash?

(phone chiming)

Leon says his wife ate

a deep fried milkshake, and it was so good!

She passed out, bro.

I just wanna sit back and eat a deep fried milkshake,

and then get sick,

and then take a nap under a bush.

That's doing the Ex Paul style!

(phone chiming) Leon says,

"You guys should be here by now!

"What are you taking, a plane, or a fuckin' turtle?"

Leon needs to stop running his mouth!

(phone chiming)

Leon says he's gonna eat all three milkshakes,

and go find the best nap bush.

Why aren't we in Winnipeg yet?!

Got it!

So my bookie's at the Winnipeg Dog Show right now,

and they're about to call the herding category.

So it's down to a shepherd named Schnitzel,

or a collie named Betsy.

He says that Schnitzel looks good for it, though.

- If it was me? - Yeah.

I'd go 50 grand on the Schnitz.

F-fifty?

Holy shit.

Holy shit, uh...

- Fifty grand on the Schnitz!

- Is that a question? - No, that's not a question!

- Okay? - I want it!

- (laughing) - Yeah, 50, all in!

Nice!

Whoo!

That was the biggest bet I ever made.

Nice.

Woo-hoo, Schnitz, don't fail me now!

Heather!

Put the thing down!

It's a live animal.

You don't know how to use it.

Are you guys hearing this?

He's been saying all sorts of crazy things.

Heather, put that critter down!

Please!

(groaning)

You know, if you talk to somebody

when they're sleeping, they'll answer.

Prank Wife!

"Prank Wife?"

Okay, I'm just gonna ask him what we all wanna know!

Brady?

You said you're getting divorced?

- Is Heather your wife? - Yes.

What happened to your marriage?

She made prank videos for her channel.

Whoa!

Is that what all

the critters are about, then?

Heather,

put the ferret down!

Please!

It looks angry!

Prank Wife!

Man, somebody's gotta look that up!

Hello?

What?

(chatter on radio) Yes!

Yes!

I won.

I fucking won!

(screaming)

Ohh my God!

I fucking won, oh my gosh!

Yesss!

I got it, I got it,

check it out!

Dean, Jesus!

...of a husband is about to take a shower,

and I'm gonna pour a hot cup of coffee on him.

Prank Wife!

Ooh!

(Paul chuckling)

(Brady shrieking)

What is that, coffee?!

Don't forget to like and subscribe!

Ah, Prank Wife!

Shit, we're out of the pocket!

That's deadly, his wife is Jackass!

I wanna watch more!

Hey, turn around back into the pocket!

Watch it when you get back to Winnipeg!

Nobody's turning this plane around.

You know how you take control of a plane?

You gotta Conair them, man.

Are you...

Gonna highjack this thing?

Hear me out!

So dude

pulls a condom out of his throat

with lighter fluid and matches inside,

and he burns another bro.

And then when shit gets crazy,

he hits a switch, and it releases

Cyrus the Virus.

And then Cyrus gets a gun,

and he puts it to the pilot's neck,

and he tells him to turn the plane around.

We're not doin' any of that.

Man, I haven't had a cigar since my first born.

Oh, you got kids.

Yeah, man.

My youngest just graduated high school.

- Congrats. - Congrats to you, man!

Mm.

Looks to me like you've got a lucky pocket.

Ooh.

A lucky pocket.

So what, uh, you're even now?

Yeah. (clearing throat)

And it feels good.

Yeah.

Being even is cool.

Mm.

But bein' up...

...is even cooler.

Oh, shit!

Are we really goin' back into my lucky pocket?

Startin' to feel like it!

It is startin' to feel like it!

Oh shit.

- I'm really doin' it! - Yeah, you really are doin' it!

Shh, shh.

Uh hey, just a quick note from the cockpit,

um, looks like a lot of troubling weather

and... turbulence up ahead.

But don't worry, it's... I-- I see it.

Don't do it.

Don't you do it,

don't you turn this plane around!

He's fuckin' doin' it!

So my husband Brady is the internet's

favourite dumb ass.

I'm gonna straight up throw this chair at him

when he's in the shower.

Prank Wife!

Brady: Oof! (coughing and groaning)

Oh, I got his balls.

(laughing) Prank Wife!

(Heather laughing)

Poor thing.

(snoring)

Dean,

let's do the Conair thing.

- Yes, guy! - So what's the plan,

what's your gun?

- I got cheesecake right here.

Is it in a box, or is it all loose?

Well, a bag's as good as a box?

So it's loose.

Yeah, I brought loose cheese cake.

How many times do I gotta say it?

- What are we doin', here? - Doesn't matter.

I want you to grab a clump of that shit,

stick it up to the pilot's face,

and make him turn this plane around.

Let's fuckin' do it!

Okay, got it!

Okay, so my bookie's at a casting session

- for a dog food commercial. - Buddy gets around.

Pfft, I'll say.

Says it's between a Chihuahua named Charlie,

and a mutt named Sweats.

Says they always bring a mutt in at the call backs,

just to show that they're open minded or something,

but they never actually pick the mutt.

Sounds like an easy bet to me.

Right?

So, the Chihuahua?

What do you think, 50?

Nah, we've already done 50.

A hundred?

Go big or go home, bro.

Oh, I'm really gonna do this.

Lucky pocket, bro!

A hundred thousand

on Charlie the Chihuahua.

(chuckling)

- Whoa, whoa, whoa! - Turn this plane around,

and take us to Winnipeg, or this pilot gets it!

Chickadee?

'Sup.

Just chill, be cool, man, be cool.

Just don't do anything that you're gonna regret.

We need to be in Winnipeg half an hour ago

for the damn milkshakes!

Now turn this old ass plane around!

Okay, okay, okay!

- Turn it around. - (engine puttering)

Chickadee: Shit!

- Uh... - Pilot: Ah!

It says we're out of gas?

Oh shit!

Paul: I don't feel us landing!

It uh, it looks like the safest spot to land

would be...

Grouse Lake.

Paul: What?!

Did he just say Grouse Lake?!

(groaning)

I can't believe this!

(phone chiming)

It's Leon!

He sent a voice memo.

Milkshakes sold out, fat necks!

I'll be dreamin' about you losers

while I'm nappin' in some prime bush.

It's...

Over.

It's never over, bro.

We got our own barrel!

Let's go to the North Store,

we'll get a buttload of canola oil,

and we'll fry this in the yard.

You wanna deep fry

that old, dirty, loose cheesecake?

Bag and all.

You want some deep fried backpack?

For honestly?

Yeah, man.

As it turns out,

we never needed to go anywhere.

The fry barrel was in us the whole time.

Paul: That's beautiful.

Dean: Yeah!

Brady: Hey, sorry I fell asleep on you there.

How was your flight?

Good, actually.

I didn't think about work once.

Are we in Winnipeg?!

No, we're almost back in Grouse Lake.

Did I sleep through the whole trip?

It's a long story.

Hey, I didn't talk in my sleep, did I?

Sometimes I do that.

No, you didn't say a word.

Ah, phew!

(phone chiming)

Fuck!

Deedee bought a new horse!

(phone buzzing)

Hello?

Sweats!

What?

They went with the fucking mutt.

They never go with the fucking mutt!

(sobbing) They never go with the fucking... mutt!

I'll just go ahead and land this thing.

(Pilot sobbing)

Chickadee: Yeah, land-ho, bitches!

That was so sick, man!

Thanks for letting me take the wheel.

My life is over.

Between my wife and

my dog bookie,

shit, I'm a dead man.

Hey, man.

Here's what you're gonna do:

You're gonna gas up this tin can,

you're gonna fly as north as you can,

and don't turn back.

You're a ghost now, bro.

My YouTube channel has proven to be

too much of a challenge for my marriage,

so after some couples therapy,

I've taken a long, hard look at what's important to me,

and that's my husband.

I love him,

and I have to stop terrorizing him.

Just kidding. (laughing)

(animal squeaking)

Totally gonna throw this ferret

at him when he's in the shower.

(ferret chattering, snarling)

Brady: Ah, a ferret!

(shrieking)

Prank Wife!

Brady: I thought we were gonna work this out!

Well, are you gonna get it

outta here?!

What the fuck?!

Ah! I want a divorce!

("Close As She Wants Me" by Pima Express plays)

♪ Yes I can love you baby ♪

♪ All night long ♪

♪ I could give you everything ♪

♪ That you want Just look into my eyes ♪

♪ And you can see my love ♪

♪ Yes I can love you baby ♪