All language subtitles for Wings (1990) - S05E14 - The Faygitive (480p DVD x265 Silence).eng

( upbeat piano theme playing )

So you got everything
under control?

Joey, Joey, for the fifth time,
I got everything covered, man.

FAA reports, monthly bills,
flight logs.

Go on your date, have yourself a
good time, that's why I'm here.

All right, okay.

You know, I have to admit,
I had some doubts about

this partnership thing at first,
but it really is working out,

thanks partner.

Hey, no problem, partner.

Ready to go?

Yep.

Same deal as last week?

Cash in advance?
You got it.

Same deal as last week?

Yep. Half cheese,
half pepperoni.

Morning.

Morning, Fay.
Morning, Fay.

Have you heard of
this phenomenon where

you think of somebody,
and then the phone rings

and it's them?

Oh yeah.

Well, this morning
I was thinking about

my old friend Delores,
and guess who called?

You old friend Delores.

No, my old friend Betty.

Well, Fay,
you must be psychic.

Uh, do you know what
I'm thinking right now?

No.

Oh, good.

Well, anyway, Betty called
to find out

if she could give out
my phone number.

It seems someone called her
looking for Fay Schlob,

and he wouldn't say why
he was calling,

so she didn't
give it to him.

Wait a minute,
wait a minute.

Fay, your maiden name
was Schlob?

I'm not ashamed. I come from
a long line of Schlobs.

In fact, there was
a Schlob on the Mayflower.

Mmm, that's right, 'cause at
the first Thanksgiving,

he was the pilgrim who kept
saying, "Pull my finger."

Well, it just so happens,
that I come from

very humble,
hard-working stock.

Yeah. Just a bunch of
poor Schlobs.

( phone rings )

Excuse me.

Uh, Alex, you have to help me.

Last night, I'm watching
Gone with the Wind.

Near the end of the movie,
Rhett is at the door.

He looks back, and he says,
"Frankly, Scarlett,"

and then, suddenly,
I lost the channel.

What does he tell her?

I don't give a damn.

Sorry to have bothered you.

No, no, no,
that's the line,

that's what Rhett said
to Scarlett.

Sounds like you got
a reception problem.

I know exactly what you need.

I got a guy can fix you up
for 50 bucks.

Fifty dollars?

Uh, that's a lot of money for me
just to watch TV.

Yeah, it's not like
you don't have

plenty of other things to do.

Send him over.

How about you, Lambert?

Everything okay
over at your house?

I'd be glad to come over
and give you whatever you need.

Roy, if you ever set foot
in my house,

the only thing I'll need
is an alibi.

Well, this is turning out
to be quite a day,

I just got a phone call
from another old friend.

Seems someone called
looking for Fay Dumbly.

Uhh... I'm sorry,
Fay Dumbly?

It was my first husband's
last name.

You married a man named Dumbly
and took his name?

Don't forget,
she was a Schlob.

Now, that's not a very nice
thing to say.

I mean, who among us
hasn't stood at a salad bar

and missed the sneeze guard?

That's the second call
I've gotten today

about somebody looking for me.

You don't think I should be
afraid, do you?

Ah, Fay, remember in
the immortal words

of Franklin Roosevelt:

"You have nothing to fear
but fear itself."

Thank you, Lowell.

And a crazed loony, coming after
you hell-bent on revenge.

Ah, good luck with it.

( whistling )

Good morning, ladies.

Hey.
Morning.

You seem happy today.

Oh, you bet I am.

Last night,
I got my antenna adjusted.

Well, I've never quite heard
it phrased that way,

but congratulations.

No, no, no, I just mean...

Roy's friend,
he fixed my TV reception.

Oh.

Not only did he make
the picture clear,

but suddenly, it's picking up
channels it never got before.

I just got done watching
a Farsi cooking show.

Mwah.

Antonio, don't you get it?

I mean, Roy's guy
obviously hooked you into

somebody else's cable.

That's illegal.
Yep.

Oh, I don't believe it.

Even Roy would not
do something like that.

Hey, Scarpacci,
hear my friend paid you a visit.

Yeah.
Where's my envelope?

Well, he did ask me
to give you this.

You mean?

No, I got you 120 channels
out of the goodness of my heart.

( laughs )

I'm sorry I'm late,
I'm a little upset.

Why, what's the matter?

Well, I got another
strange phone call last night.

This one was from my old
neighbor in Manhattan.

It seems somebody showed up
at her door

asking about a Fay DeVay.

( chuckling ):
DeVay?

Your name was DeVay?
You're kidding.

No, it was my second husband
George's last name.

Well, after Schlob and Dumbly,
that's DeVay I'd have gone.

Please don't start,
I've heard them all.

"Show me DeVay,"
"Do you go all DeVay?"

And my personal favorite,

"Old soldiers never die,
they just Fay DeVay."

( both laugh )

Well, it's all very amusing,
but I'd appreciate it

if you'd take this
a little more seriously.

I was up all night
worrying about it.

Oh, look, we're sorry.

Come on, we'll get you something
to calm you down.

Hey, Helen?
Fay needs a cup of tea.

You know DeVay she likes it.

What? What's going on?

Well, Fay got another call
about someone tracking her down.

But that doesn't mean
there's anything to worry about.

Yeah, it really doesn't.
I mean, just 'cause

someone's looking for you,
it could be anything.

Maybe you opened a bank account
a long time ago

and forgot about it.

That's right.

Maybe somebody died
and left you a big inheritance.

Maybe a long lost child
that you put up for adoption

is looking for her
birth mother.

If I gave birth to a child,
I think I'd know it.

Not necessarily.

Adoption agencies are very tight
with that information.

I'll go get you that tea.

Well, I just
can't help feeling

that someone out there
is stalking me.

Fay, Brian and I are not gonna
let anything happen to you.

You're like family.

Absolutely.

And just keep that in mind

in case it does turn out
to be an inheritance.

( phone rings )

Sandpiper Air,
how can I help you?

Hey, Joe, this is Helen.

See that guy standing over at
the Aeromass counter?

He's been snooping around,

asking everybody
if they know Fay.

Thanks.

Fay... see that guy over there?

He may be the one
who's looking for you.

Now, why don't you
slip out the back

and we'll keep him talking
and stall him.

Excuse me.

I'm looking for a...

Fay Evelyn Schlob
Dumbly DeVay Cochran.

I don't know,
that's a pretty common name.

Look, I'm
a private investigator.

I was hired to find
a Ms. Fay Cochran.

I was told that
she works for Sandpiper.

Well, why you looking for her?

I'm not at liberty
to answer that.

Who hired you?

I'm not at liberty
to answer that.

What's your name?

Or are you not at liberty
to answer that?

Bob.

So, Bob, you're
a private investigator, huh?

Private eye, a gumshoe, shamus.

Don't tell me, you live above
a bar that has a neon sign

that constantly flashes
the word "eats."

And everywhere you go, you hear
the sounds of a mournful sax.

Yeah, and your girlfriend's
a hooker with a heart of gold.

Look, I live in
a condo in Paramus,

I only listen to
classical music,

and my girlfriend's
not a hooker.

She's a massage therapist.

Helen, uhh, I'd like you
to meet Bob.

He's a PI who's trying to find
out if we know someone named--

What was that name again?

Fay Evelyn Schlob
Dumbly DeVay Cochran.

Could you be
a little more specific?

Look, I really don't think
we have anyone

named Fay Cochran
working here at Sandpiper.

What are you saying, Joe?

You know Fay.

You know her,
she's about yea big.

Lives at 205 Elm Street,
usually stands right behind

this nameplate right here.

All right, all right.

I lied.

I'm Fay...

something, something...

DeSomething, Cochran.

According to my records,
Ms. Cochran

would be in her early '60s.

I've had a lot of work done.

No, it's all right, Helen.

I'm Fay Cochran.

I knew I knew her.

Now, why are you
looking for me?

I haven't done anything.

All I know is,
I was hired to find

the former Fay Schlob
from Syracuse.

You don't have to
tell him anything, Fay.

Well, it's all right,
I've got nothing to hide.

Look, when I lived in Syracuse,
I led a very ordinary life.

I went to school, I helped
my mom in the garden,

I volunteered at the USO,
I served sodas at Woolworths,

I'm a model citizen.

Then, as near as I can tell,
you're the one he's looking for.

We'll be in touch.

Hey, sit.
Where the hell you been?

You lost two fares already.

Yeah, I know,
I just couldn't tear myself away

from the Cartoon Network's
A Pup Named Scooby-Doo.

You're still getting cable?

I thought we were
having it disconnected.

Yeah, I am. Soon, soon.

But... I tell you,

this cable TV
is truly wonderful.

Have you heard of this
Shopping Channel?

Oh, man, don't tell me
you bought any of that junk.

Junk?

( mumbles )

Look, I know the difference
between junk

and something of value.

Like, this, like this life-size
porcelain squirrel,

which will be arriving
in about three to four weeks.

Gotta go, almost time for
Yo! MTV Raps.

Antonio, you're talking like
a cable junkie.

Look, Antonio,
listen to me.

You may really have
a problem here.

I know it starts out small;

you know, you start
experimenting a little bit

with CNN, then you move
to the hard stuff...

Nickelodeon...

Then all of a sudden,
it's 4 a.m., you're strung out

watching that bald man
spray paint his head.

Uh... are you saying
I have a problem?

( laughs nervously )

Well, I don't.

I can quit any time.

Brian...

I think I was followed in
from the parking lot.

Oh, all right, don't worry
about it, I'll check it out.

( screams )

Sorry, Fay. You dropped your
mitten out in the parking lot.

Tried to catch up with you,

but you're harder to catch
than a greased pig.

Wanna know how I know?

No!

Oh, I-I'm just so
on edge ever since

that investigator
showed up yesterday.

I mean, what can he want?
What have I done?

( exasperated sigh )

How you doing, Fay?

Oh, how do you think
I'm doing?

I'm a walking bull's-eye.

Fay's still upset, huh?

Yeah... she still thinks
she's being hunted down

for something she did
in her past.

What reason would
anybody have to harm Fay?

I mean, she's the nicest,

sweetest, cheeriest person
in the world.

There's three reasons
right there.

HELEN:
I know, it's ridiculous.

I mean, Fay's never done
anything bad.

Me, on the other hand, I've done
a lot of things I'm ashamed of.

Well, I wish you'd done some of
them when we were dating.

Oh, that's right, we dated.

There's another thing
I'm ashamed of.

Well, I don't know about
you guys,

but I've never done
anything wrong in my life.

Oh, come on.

Just knowing you is number one,
two, and three on my list.

I once shot a man in Reno
just to watch him die.

Excuse me?

All right, I didn't,
but it sounds

a little more interesting
than I voted for Dukakis.

Oh, come on, who hasn't done
something that they regret?

Shoplifting a pack of gum?

ALL ( mumble ):
Yeah...

Smoking in
the school bathroom?

( all laugh )

Finding yourself in
the Kuwaiti Desert

playing strip poker with
a Bedouin chieftain.

Or, you know,
something like that.

Hey, Antonio, how you doing?

My life is ruined.

My world has crumbled

into a black hole
of meaningless despair.

Coffee?

Hey, what happened?

They found
my illegal hookup...

and disconnected my cable.

They told me I have to pay
a $200 fine.

What if I can't pay the fine,

and I have to go to jail?

You know what happens in jail?

I'd only get
three major networks.

Are you happy?

Look what you've
turned him into.

Hey, I was just trying to
do him a favor, all right?

I'll take care of it.
I'll take care of it.

Look, uh-- Oh, Scarpacci,
uh, I'm sorry about the way

things turned out, huh?

See ya.

Roy. Roy,
there is one thing.

Uh, the cable company said
if I could tell them the name

of the person who helped me
get the illegal hookup,

they would drop the fine.

( chuckles nervously )

And-- And--
And w-what'd you say?

I told them I wasn't sure I
could remember who "Mr. Big" is.

"Bigg-is"

Sounds a lot like "Biggins."

You know, it's all starting
to come back to me.

All right.

All right,
I'll give you the money.

Oh, keep your money.

Just let me come
to your house tonight

and watch the finals
of buck-naked line dancing.

( chuckles )

Deal.

( gasps )

( screams )
Ah!

W-what's going on?

Fay tried to attack me
with that bowling trophy.

I-I was just trying
to defend myself,

I thought someone was
coming after me with a gun.

All right,
Fay, calm down.

I had no idea
you were this upset

about this whole situation.

Why don't you come home
with me and Brian tonight.

Oh, no. I mean,
this is just ridiculous.

I can't spend the rest of
my life jumping at every sound.

I mean, look,
I almost killed poor Lowell.

Yeah, right.
I could have taken you easy.

Now, um,
you boys go on home.

I'll be-- I'll be able
to manage by myself.

You sure?
Yeah.

Absolutely sure.
Okay.

All right. I'm gonna go.

Brian's waiting for me.

Okay.
Good night.

You know, Fay,
you're absolutely right.

This is no way
to live your life.

Just in case,
I want you to have these!

Oh!

What are those?

Nunchaks.

Ancient Japanese instruments
of death and mutilation.

Ho! Ho! Hoo!

Use 'em in good health.

Lowell, you bring these
to work with you every day?

Of course not.

Only on Wednesdays.

( gasps )

Fay. Fay Schlob.

Who are you?

I'm the one that's
been looking for you.

N-no. Don't you
take another step.

I'm warning you,
I've got numskulls here

and I know how to use them.

Fay, we talked it over.

You should
come home with us.

Yes, no problem
at all.

Joe, I know who's
been stalking me.

Who?
Him.

Who the hell
are you?

I've got something here
that's gonna settle this.

FAY:
Oh, my God.
He's got a gun!

Oh, no, no, no.
It's just a picture.

W-w-why you wavin'
that thing around for?

Fay, who are these guys?

Them? Oh, these are my two, big,
overprotective, strong sons

who were just recently
released from prison.

I once shot a man in Reno
just to watch him die.

Anyway, look.

Would you just take
a look at the picture?

That'll explain everything.

Well, it's pretty
old and faded.

Looks like you, Fay.

Let me look at that.

Oh, heh, that is me.

It's funny how you can
lock into a hairdo.

Who's that soldier
you have your arm around?

Well, that's me.

Pete Nash.

That was taken
in, uh, 1951.

When we met.

Well, I'm sorry,
I don't remember you.

Uh, it still doesn't
explain why you're here.

Well, I suppose you could say
it's because you owe me a dance.

A dance. See? I knew there
was a simple explanation.

The night before I
shipped out to Korea,

my, uh, buddies and I, we went
down to the USO in Syracuse.

Oh, my girlfriends and I
used to volunteer there.

We danced with the soldiers.

( chuckling ):
I know.

I was one of them.

I was just 19. I was scared
to death of going to war.

And you sat up with me
all night, talking.

You told me not to worry,
that I'd come back.

I said, "How do you know that?"

And you said, "You gotta come
back, you owe me a dance."

That's so sweet.

It certainly was.

Well, all the time
I was in Korea,

I carried your
picture with me.

As a matter of fact, I told my
buddies that you were my girl.

Oh.
BRIAN: Wow.

So carrying Fay's picture
got you through the war?

Oh, sure. That picture
saved my life.

It did?

One day we were under
heavy artillery fire

and, ah, I was--
I was so scared

and I took out
your picture--

You mean, just--
Just looking at my face

gave you the courage
to go on.

No. I took out your picture
and I dropped it.

And I bent down
to pick it up--

When a bullet
meant for you

whizzed right
over your head?

No, I bent down
to pick it up,

I slipped on my canteen,

the rifle discharged
and I shot myself in the ass.

What kind of a medal
do they give you for that?

And where
do they pin it?

Well, there I was,
in this V.A. hospital,

lying there with a bullet
in my keister

and it reminded me
of you, Fay.

Well, I-I'm flattered.

But you still don't remember
who I am, do you?

No, I'm sorry, I don't.

Well, you see, I danced
with a lot of boys.

Well, let me
give you a clue.

I was a very
bad dancer.

Oh, well, most of
the boys were.

But I stepped
on your toes.

A lot of the boys did.

But I broke one.

( gasps )

My goodness, was that you?

That was me.

Oh.
So, uh...

Basically your
war story is

you broke Fay's toe
and shot yourself in the ass.

Bet you keep the grandkids
riveted with that.

Uh, you know boys, I think
everything will be fine now.

You can go home.

You sure?

Yes, I'm sure.
Okay.

Well, nice to meet you.

Goodbye, Mommy.

( chuckles )

Well, uh, Pete,
I'm curious.

I mean, how come it took you
so long to find me?

Well, after the war,
I tried to find you.

I went back to Syracuse
but you'd moved.

Well, eventually I-- I got
married and the years rolled by.

Recently my wife died.

I was looking at
some old pictures

and I came across
that one of you and me

and I realized there
were so many things

I meant to do in my life
that I hadn't done.

And one of them
was seeing you again.

And thanking you for helping me
get through that war.

So, Fay, thank you.

You're welcome.

Well, I guess I'd
better be going.

Oh, wait, um...

Um, I believe you still
owe me a dance.

( rock song playing )

( upbeat dance
song playing )

( soft jazz
song playing )

Well, that's better.

Well, I warn you,
I'm still a bad dancer.

Oh, that's okay,
you just follow me.

Ow.

Sorry.
That's okay.

Ow.

Sorry.
It's all right.

( light rock theme playing )