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1
00:00:01,940 --> 00:00:05,440
( upbeat piano theme playing )
2
00:00:05,440 --> 00:00:06,940
This is interesting.
3
00:00:06,940 --> 00:00:09,440
It says here
that 75 percent
4
00:00:09,440 --> 00:00:11,950
of all people
who work together,
5
00:00:11,950 --> 00:00:14,450
eventually become
romantically involved.
6
00:00:14,450 --> 00:00:16,450
Seventy-five percent?
7
00:00:16,450 --> 00:00:18,450
That can't be right.
Let me see that.
8
00:00:18,450 --> 00:00:20,450
Damn.
That's what it says all right.
9
00:00:20,450 --> 00:00:23,960
Well, you know,
think about it for a second.
10
00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:25,460
You know, Joe and Helen
work here
11
00:00:25,460 --> 00:00:27,460
and they used to be
in a relationship.
12
00:00:27,460 --> 00:00:28,960
Brian and Alex work here,
13
00:00:28,960 --> 00:00:30,970
they're dating now.
14
00:00:30,970 --> 00:00:32,470
That's four out of eight.
15
00:00:32,470 --> 00:00:36,470
That's damn near 50 percent
right there.
16
00:00:37,970 --> 00:00:40,980
If that statistic is correct,
then that means
17
00:00:40,980 --> 00:00:44,480
that two of us will...
18
00:00:55,490 --> 00:00:57,990
You can do a lot worse.
19
00:00:57,990 --> 00:00:59,990
( upbeat piano theme playing )
20
00:01:12,010 --> 00:01:14,010
Joe Hackett,
get down here right now.
21
00:01:17,010 --> 00:01:18,510
What, what?
What?
22
00:01:18,510 --> 00:01:19,510
What is it?
What are you doing?
23
00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:23,020
What is this?
( sighs )
24
00:01:23,020 --> 00:01:24,020
Not again.
25
00:01:24,020 --> 00:01:26,020
Lowell, it's a sponge.
26
00:01:26,020 --> 00:01:27,520
That's right, Joe.
27
00:01:27,520 --> 00:01:30,020
And Joe, when we're not
cleaning with this sponge,
28
00:01:30,020 --> 00:01:31,530
where does it go?
29
00:01:34,030 --> 00:01:35,030
Down your throat.
30
00:01:36,530 --> 00:01:38,030
You, of all people,
should know
31
00:01:38,030 --> 00:01:40,030
that when we're not
using this sponge,
32
00:01:40,030 --> 00:01:42,540
that it goes
in its sponge cradle.
33
00:01:44,540 --> 00:01:46,540
Where it can dry off,
34
00:01:46,540 --> 00:01:48,540
so that it's not soggy,
and slimy,
35
00:01:48,540 --> 00:01:50,540
and stinky
for the next user,
36
00:01:50,540 --> 00:01:53,550
which is,
by the way, usually me.
37
00:01:53,550 --> 00:01:55,050
Give me a break.
38
00:01:57,050 --> 00:01:59,050
Mornin'.
39
00:01:59,050 --> 00:02:00,050
Well,
40
00:02:00,050 --> 00:02:02,560
look who finally decided
to come home.
41
00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:06,060
Well, I was staying overnight
at Alex's.
42
00:02:06,060 --> 00:02:07,560
You-you got a problem
with that?
43
00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:10,560
And now I suppose
you'd like some breakfast.
44
00:02:12,570 --> 00:02:14,070
Yeah, okay.
What do you got?
45
00:02:20,570 --> 00:02:22,080
Lasagna?
46
00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:23,080
For breakfast?
47
00:02:23,080 --> 00:02:26,080
No. Lasagna for dinner.
48
00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:28,580
Unless of course,
somebody forgets to call home
49
00:02:28,580 --> 00:02:31,090
to say they won't be here.
50
00:02:34,090 --> 00:02:36,090
Lowell, give it a rest,
will ya, please?
51
00:02:36,090 --> 00:02:38,090
You know, I'd think
by this time
52
00:02:38,090 --> 00:02:40,090
that the two of you
would have more consideration
53
00:02:40,090 --> 00:02:41,600
for my feelings.
54
00:02:41,600 --> 00:02:45,100
But maybe that's just too much
to hope for.
55
00:02:46,100 --> 00:02:48,600
Listen,
I gotta get to work now,
56
00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:50,100
but this conversation
is not over.
57
00:02:50,100 --> 00:02:52,610
We're gonna continue it
tonight at supper.
58
00:02:54,110 --> 00:02:57,110
Well, your lunches
are in the refrigerator,
59
00:02:59,110 --> 00:03:01,120
and don't forget
to take your vitamins.
60
00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:07,120
You know,
I don't know about you
61
00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:08,120
but I have had it.
62
00:03:08,120 --> 00:03:09,620
Why do we put up with this?
63
00:03:09,620 --> 00:03:11,130
Well, you know,
he cooks, he cleans,
64
00:03:11,130 --> 00:03:12,130
makes incredible lasagna.
65
00:03:12,130 --> 00:03:14,130
This-this thing is good
even the next day.
66
00:03:14,130 --> 00:03:15,130
Would you forget that?
67
00:03:15,130 --> 00:03:17,130
Joey,
you're forgettin' somethin'.
68
00:03:17,130 --> 00:03:18,130
We kind of owe him.
69
00:03:18,130 --> 00:03:21,140
I sank his houseboat,
remember?
70
00:03:21,140 --> 00:03:22,640
Yeah, I-I know,
but we have put him up
71
00:03:22,640 --> 00:03:23,640
for over a year now.
72
00:03:23,640 --> 00:03:25,140
I think that debt is paid.
73
00:03:25,140 --> 00:03:27,140
We've gotta tell him
to move out.
74
00:03:27,140 --> 00:03:28,640
I'm behind you
100 percent.
75
00:03:28,640 --> 00:03:29,640
Let me know
how it comes out.
76
00:03:31,150 --> 00:03:32,150
No, no, no.
77
00:03:32,150 --> 00:03:33,650
We're gonna tell him together.
78
00:03:34,650 --> 00:03:36,150
Yeah.
79
00:03:36,150 --> 00:03:37,150
Yeah, you're absolutely right.
80
00:03:37,150 --> 00:03:39,150
I mean, we should just
go down there right now
81
00:03:39,150 --> 00:03:40,660
and just tell him
that he's out of here.
82
00:03:40,650 --> 00:03:41,660
Good.
This is our house, right?
83
00:03:41,660 --> 00:03:43,660
Yeah, you bet it is.
Let's go.
84
00:03:43,660 --> 00:03:46,660
Oh. Well, first I better
wring out that sponge.
85
00:03:46,660 --> 00:03:48,660
( upbeat piano theme playing )
86
00:03:53,170 --> 00:03:54,670
Oh, Alex.
87
00:03:54,670 --> 00:03:56,170
Hold up.
I got somethin' for you
88
00:03:57,670 --> 00:03:58,670
For me?
89
00:03:58,670 --> 00:03:59,670
Why?
90
00:03:59,670 --> 00:04:01,680
Oh, I just saw it
and I thought of you
91
00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:03,180
so I bought it.
92
00:04:03,180 --> 00:04:04,180
Really?
93
00:04:04,180 --> 00:04:05,680
HELEN:
Yeah, really.
94
00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:07,680
I-I don't get it.
It's not my birthday.
95
00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:09,180
So?
96
00:04:09,180 --> 00:04:13,190
So you just got me a gift
for no reason at all?
97
00:04:13,190 --> 00:04:14,690
I'm beginning to think so.
98
00:04:16,190 --> 00:04:18,690
Um, look, I-I just got it
'cause we're friends. Okay?
99
00:04:19,690 --> 00:04:20,690
Oh. Okay.
100
00:04:20,690 --> 00:04:23,200
Thanks.
101
00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:25,700
W-when was the last time
you got something for Fay?
102
00:04:25,700 --> 00:04:28,200
Well, it certainly wasn't
on my last birthday.
103
00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:31,210
Oh, for Pete's sake,
104
00:04:31,210 --> 00:04:32,710
it's just a little pin
105
00:04:32,710 --> 00:04:33,710
in the shape
of a helicopter, see?
106
00:04:33,710 --> 00:04:34,710
It's no big deal.
107
00:04:34,710 --> 00:04:37,710
Or the birthday before that.
108
00:04:39,210 --> 00:04:41,220
Well, this is--
This is really nice.
109
00:04:41,220 --> 00:04:42,720
Thanks, Helen.
110
00:04:44,720 --> 00:04:46,220
Hi. Morning.
Morning, guys.
111
00:04:46,220 --> 00:04:47,720
Oh, listen.
You know where Lowell is?
112
00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:48,720
Uh, I think he's
in the hanger.
113
00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:50,220
Let's go.
114
00:04:50,220 --> 00:04:51,730
Uh, I can't remember.
115
00:04:51,730 --> 00:04:53,230
Did you get me something
for Christmas?
116
00:04:54,730 --> 00:04:56,730
Yes, Fay,
I did.
117
00:04:56,730 --> 00:05:00,230
Oh, right.
Debbie Reynolds' workout tape.
118
00:05:02,240 --> 00:05:03,740
Thanks again.
119
00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:09,240
Yeah, guys?
What do you need?
120
00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:11,250
Lowell, we're not gonna beat
around the bush.
121
00:05:11,250 --> 00:05:13,750
Joe has something
he wants to tell you.
122
00:05:13,750 --> 00:05:14,750
Yeah, Joe?
123
00:05:14,750 --> 00:05:17,250
Well, Lowell, Brian and I
have been talking,
124
00:05:17,250 --> 00:05:19,750
and, um,
we think it's time for you
125
00:05:19,750 --> 00:05:21,760
to find a place
of your own.
126
00:05:22,260 --> 00:05:24,260
What do you mean?
127
00:05:24,260 --> 00:05:27,260
It's about all your rules
and regulations.
128
00:05:27,260 --> 00:05:29,260
Yeah. We know
you mean well, but see,
129
00:05:29,260 --> 00:05:30,770
Joe and I would sort of
like to go back
130
00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:33,270
to the way it was
before you moved in.
131
00:05:34,270 --> 00:05:35,270
What do you mean?
132
00:05:38,270 --> 00:05:41,780
When we lived there
and you didn't.
133
00:05:43,280 --> 00:05:46,280
You know, if somebody
were to walk in here right now,
134
00:05:46,280 --> 00:05:48,280
they might think
that you guys
135
00:05:48,280 --> 00:05:49,780
didn't want me
to live you anymore.
136
00:05:49,780 --> 00:05:51,290
We don't.
137
00:05:51,290 --> 00:05:52,790
We want you
to find your own place.
138
00:05:52,790 --> 00:05:55,290
Yeah. We want you
to move out.
139
00:05:56,290 --> 00:05:57,790
I'm gettin' mixed signals here.
140
00:06:01,300 --> 00:06:02,800
Move out.
141
00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:07,300
Well, you don't have to
tell Lowell Mather twice.
142
00:06:09,300 --> 00:06:13,310
Huh. Far be it from me to stay
some place where I'm not wanted.
143
00:06:13,310 --> 00:06:14,310
Oh, now, come on.
144
00:06:14,310 --> 00:06:16,310
Lowell--
No, no, no, no, no, Joe.
145
00:06:16,310 --> 00:06:17,810
I've tried very hard
this past year
146
00:06:17,810 --> 00:06:19,810
to take care of you boys.
147
00:06:19,810 --> 00:06:20,810
Did I complain?
No, I did not.
148
00:06:20,810 --> 00:06:21,820
I did it gladly.
149
00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:28,320
I only hope that someday,
150
00:06:28,320 --> 00:06:30,830
you two have children
that treat you
151
00:06:30,820 --> 00:06:32,830
the way that you're
treating me now.
152
00:06:37,330 --> 00:06:38,330
( sighs )
153
00:06:38,330 --> 00:06:39,330
Feel kinda guilty?
154
00:06:40,330 --> 00:06:41,840
Yeah, kinda.
155
00:06:42,840 --> 00:06:43,840
That feeling pretty much passed.
156
00:06:43,840 --> 00:06:45,340
Yeah, completely gone.
157
00:06:45,340 --> 00:06:47,340
( upbeat piano theme playing )
158
00:06:52,350 --> 00:06:54,850
Mornin', Alex.
Morning.
159
00:06:54,850 --> 00:06:55,850
Here.
160
00:06:58,350 --> 00:07:00,350
You got this for me?
Why?
161
00:07:00,350 --> 00:07:02,360
I saw it and I thought of you,
so I bought it.
162
00:07:02,360 --> 00:07:03,860
I hope you like it.
163
00:07:05,360 --> 00:07:07,360
Wow.
164
00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:09,360
This is beautiful.
Thank you.
165
00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:11,370
Good.
I feel better.
166
00:07:14,370 --> 00:07:15,870
What does that mean?
167
00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:18,870
You know. You got me something,
I got you something.
168
00:07:19,870 --> 00:07:21,880
Oh. No, no, no.
See--
169
00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:23,380
Uh, just because
I got you something first,
170
00:07:23,380 --> 00:07:25,880
that doesn't mean that you
have to get me something back.
171
00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:27,880
If I never would've
gotten you that helicopter pin,
172
00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:29,380
I mean,
you never would've thought
173
00:07:29,380 --> 00:07:30,890
about gettin' me something,
and that's okay.
174
00:07:30,880 --> 00:07:33,890
I don't know. I-I might've
if I saw something
175
00:07:33,890 --> 00:07:35,390
that remind me of you,
176
00:07:35,390 --> 00:07:38,390
like a pin in the shape
of a spatula, or something.
177
00:07:41,900 --> 00:07:43,400
A spatula?
178
00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:45,400
Is that what you think
that I'm about?
179
00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:46,900
A fry cook?
180
00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:47,900
I didn't say that.
181
00:07:47,900 --> 00:07:50,900
Well, then, why else
would you give me a spatula pin?
182
00:07:50,900 --> 00:07:51,910
You got me
a helicopter pin,
183
00:07:51,910 --> 00:07:53,910
is that what you think
I'm all about?
184
00:07:53,910 --> 00:07:55,910
It was just a damn gift. All you
had to do was say thank you.
185
00:07:55,910 --> 00:07:57,910
Well, thank you.
Well, you're welcome,
186
00:07:57,910 --> 00:07:59,910
and thank you.
You're welcome.
187
00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:02,920
It's a shame.
188
00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:05,420
What started out
as a lovely gesture,
189
00:08:05,420 --> 00:08:08,420
turned into an ugly scene.
190
00:08:08,420 --> 00:08:09,420
Yeah.
191
00:08:09,420 --> 00:08:11,930
Think maybe if we oiled 'em up,
they'd wrestle?
192
00:08:17,430 --> 00:08:19,430
Mornin', guys.
ANTONIO: Good morning.
193
00:08:19,430 --> 00:08:21,940
Good mornin', boys.
Gorgeous day, isn't it?
194
00:08:21,940 --> 00:08:23,940
Really?
I heard it might rain.
195
00:08:23,940 --> 00:08:24,940
Oh, really?
Not at our house.
196
00:08:24,940 --> 00:08:26,440
It's bright and sunny.
197
00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:28,440
Zero percent chance of Lowell.
198
00:08:28,440 --> 00:08:29,940
( laughs )
199
00:08:29,940 --> 00:08:31,950
Yeah. I heard you boys
gave Mather the boot.
200
00:08:31,950 --> 00:08:32,950
It's about time.
201
00:08:32,950 --> 00:08:34,450
Hey, hey.
We didn't kick him out.
202
00:08:34,450 --> 00:08:36,450
We just asked him to leave.
203
00:08:36,450 --> 00:08:38,950
Where'd he go?
To a lovely place,
204
00:08:38,950 --> 00:08:40,450
called elsewhere.
205
00:08:40,450 --> 00:08:41,460
( laughter )
206
00:08:41,460 --> 00:08:44,960
You-you just threw him
out in the street?
207
00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:45,960
No, no.
208
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:47,460
When we got home last night
his stuff was gone
209
00:08:47,460 --> 00:08:48,960
I'm sure he's fine.
210
00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:52,470
I'm surprised you didn't
just turn him loose
211
00:08:52,470 --> 00:08:54,970
in the forest so he could
live with the wolves.
212
00:08:56,970 --> 00:08:58,970
What makes you think
they'd want him back?
213
00:09:00,470 --> 00:09:01,480
Come on, Antonio.
214
00:09:01,480 --> 00:09:03,980
It's high time
that Lowell was on his own.
215
00:09:03,980 --> 00:09:05,980
I-I bet he's already found
a great place to live.
216
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:09,480
( mumbles ):
Good morning, everybody.
217
00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:11,490
( upbeat piano theme playing )
218
00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:19,990
( upbeat piano theme playing )
219
00:09:19,990 --> 00:09:22,500
Hey, Lowell, what the hell
are you doin' here?
220
00:09:22,500 --> 00:09:24,000
I work here.
221
00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:25,000
Oh, yeah.
222
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:27,000
And since you guys
kicked me out of your house,
223
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,000
now I live here.
224
00:09:29,500 --> 00:09:32,010
Lowell, you can't live
in the terminal.
225
00:09:32,010 --> 00:09:33,010
What do you mean?
226
00:09:33,010 --> 00:09:35,510
Uh, we mean, you can't live
in the terminal.
227
00:09:35,510 --> 00:09:38,010
What are you saying?
I can't live in the terminal?
228
00:09:39,010 --> 00:09:40,510
Yes, that's exactly
what we're--
229
00:09:40,510 --> 00:09:41,520
No, hold on--
Fay, Fay.
230
00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:43,520
You don't wanna
push that button.
231
00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:45,020
Why can't I live
in the terminal?
232
00:09:45,020 --> 00:09:47,020
Well, for one reason,
it's not very sanitary.
233
00:09:47,020 --> 00:09:48,520
There are no showers here.
234
00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:49,520
Well, that's not a problem.
235
00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:52,030
You know, I'm actually
a lot like a camel.
236
00:09:52,030 --> 00:09:54,030
I can go for months
without water.
237
00:09:55,530 --> 00:09:56,530
You've only gone 12 hours.
238
00:09:56,530 --> 00:09:59,530
You're way too much
like a camel already.
239
00:09:59,530 --> 00:10:00,530
Oh, great.
240
00:10:00,530 --> 00:10:02,540
First you tell me
I can't live in your house,
241
00:10:02,540 --> 00:10:04,540
and now you tell me that I can't
live in the terminal.
242
00:10:04,540 --> 00:10:06,040
What's next?
243
00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:08,040
Are you gonna take me down
to the old Civil War cannon,
244
00:10:08,040 --> 00:10:09,540
stuff me in
and shoot me off the island?
245
00:10:09,540 --> 00:10:11,050
I'm game.
246
00:10:12,050 --> 00:10:14,550
Come on, Lowell.
Stop being so dramatic.
247
00:10:14,550 --> 00:10:16,550
Just go
and rent an apartment.
248
00:10:16,550 --> 00:10:17,550
( scoffs )
249
00:10:17,550 --> 00:10:19,050
You think
it's that easy, Joe?
250
00:10:19,050 --> 00:10:21,050
Just to go
and find an apartment?
251
00:10:21,050 --> 00:10:23,560
Of course,
I wouldn't have that problem
252
00:10:23,560 --> 00:10:25,560
if one of
my other good friends
253
00:10:25,560 --> 00:10:27,560
would let me live
at their house.
254
00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:29,060
( laughs )
255
00:10:30,560 --> 00:10:34,070
I wouldn't even let you live
under my house.
256
00:10:39,070 --> 00:10:41,580
Oh, L--
Well, Lowell, uh...
257
00:10:41,580 --> 00:10:44,580
Well, you know, I would let you
live at my house but, um,
258
00:10:44,580 --> 00:10:47,080
I-I really just
have the one key.
259
00:10:51,590 --> 00:10:55,090
Oh, well, you could stay
with me but, um, um,
260
00:10:55,090 --> 00:10:57,090
I'm not zoned for it.
261
00:10:58,090 --> 00:11:00,090
I-I-I don't
believe you people.
262
00:11:00,090 --> 00:11:03,600
In Italy, friends open
their doors to other friends.
263
00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:06,600
Lowell,
you can stay at my house
264
00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:08,100
as long as you like.
265
00:11:10,100 --> 00:11:13,110
Get Lowell out
of my house today...
266
00:11:14,610 --> 00:11:15,610
or I will kill him.
267
00:11:15,610 --> 00:11:17,610
W-w-wait a minute,
what happened to,
268
00:11:17,610 --> 00:11:21,120
( as Antonio ):
"In Italy, friends open
their doors for other friends."
269
00:11:21,110 --> 00:11:23,620
In Italy,
there was no Lowell.
270
00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:26,620
Well, all right.
Well, what happened?
271
00:11:26,620 --> 00:11:28,120
I-I'll you what happened.
272
00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:30,620
I'm sitting on the couch
with my date--
273
00:11:30,620 --> 00:11:32,130
A perfectly lovely woman
274
00:11:32,130 --> 00:11:35,130
once you get past
her really big face.
275
00:11:35,130 --> 00:11:36,630
--and we we are enjoying--
276
00:11:36,630 --> 00:11:38,630
Uh, wait a second.
W-w-wait.
277
00:11:38,630 --> 00:11:41,640
What do you mean,
"really big face"?
278
00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:43,640
Uh, you know,
when you look at the place
279
00:11:43,640 --> 00:11:46,640
where a person's face
usually is,
280
00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:47,640
there's face.
281
00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:50,640
But on her,
when you look to each side,
282
00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:53,650
there is...more face.
283
00:11:55,150 --> 00:11:56,150
Anyway, there we are,
284
00:11:56,150 --> 00:11:58,650
sitting, enjoying beautiful,
romantic music,
285
00:11:58,650 --> 00:12:02,160
when who should come down
the stairs for a midnight snack?
286
00:12:02,160 --> 00:12:04,160
Naked man.
Okay?
287
00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:06,160
Joe, Brian, please,
288
00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:07,660
take Lowell back.
289
00:12:08,660 --> 00:12:10,160
No.
No.
290
00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:11,670
Oh, n-n-now,
wait a minute.
291
00:12:11,670 --> 00:12:13,170
You know,
my friend Ruthie's daughter
292
00:12:13,170 --> 00:12:14,670
is a real estate agent.
293
00:12:14,670 --> 00:12:16,670
Uh, maybe she could find Lowell
a place to live.
294
00:12:17,670 --> 00:12:19,170
Hey, roomie.
295
00:12:19,170 --> 00:12:20,670
Listen, uh,
I just wanted to remind you,
296
00:12:20,670 --> 00:12:24,180
tonight is my night
to host the Rat Shooting Club.
297
00:12:24,180 --> 00:12:27,180
Don't-don't you do that
down at the dump?
298
00:12:27,180 --> 00:12:29,180
Oh. We shoot 'em
at the dump,
299
00:12:29,180 --> 00:12:31,180
we clean 'em at home.
300
00:12:35,690 --> 00:12:37,690
Please, Fay,
call your friend.
301
00:12:37,690 --> 00:12:38,690
Hurry.
302
00:12:38,690 --> 00:12:40,690
( upbeat piano theme playing )
303
00:12:42,700 --> 00:12:44,200
Now, this one
just came on the market.
304
00:12:44,200 --> 00:12:45,700
It's a one bedroom--
It's perfect.
305
00:12:45,700 --> 00:12:48,200
He'll take it.
306
00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:50,200
Don't you wanna know
anything about it?
307
00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:52,210
It's the furthest one
from our house,
308
00:12:52,210 --> 00:12:53,710
he'll take it.
309
00:12:53,710 --> 00:12:55,710
What do you think,
Lowell?
310
00:12:57,210 --> 00:12:58,210
Lowell.
311
00:12:59,710 --> 00:13:01,720
Hate it.
No.
312
00:13:01,720 --> 00:13:03,720
We have looked
at 15 places today.
313
00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:05,220
What is wrong
with this one?
314
00:13:05,220 --> 00:13:06,220
Well...
315
00:13:06,220 --> 00:13:08,220
It's got no view.
316
00:13:08,220 --> 00:13:09,220
Well,
didn't you notice
317
00:13:09,220 --> 00:13:10,720
that beautiful view
from the porch?
318
00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:12,230
Oh, great.
319
00:13:12,230 --> 00:13:13,230
The ocean.
320
00:13:15,230 --> 00:13:17,230
All right,
we'll move it.
321
00:13:17,230 --> 00:13:18,230
He'll take it.
322
00:13:18,230 --> 00:13:20,730
Oh, no.
It doesn't feel right.
323
00:13:20,730 --> 00:13:22,240
It's got
great natural light.
324
00:13:22,240 --> 00:13:24,240
I like it dark.
You can sit in the closet.
325
00:13:24,240 --> 00:13:26,240
He'll take it.
326
00:13:26,240 --> 00:13:27,740
Come on, Lowell.
327
00:13:27,740 --> 00:13:30,240
This place has everything
you said you wanted.
328
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:31,750
I know,
but you know what?
329
00:13:31,750 --> 00:13:33,750
It would never have
the feeling that--
330
00:13:33,750 --> 00:13:35,750
That I get
when I'm at your house.
331
00:13:35,750 --> 00:13:39,750
The warm feeling that you get
when you walk in the front door.
332
00:13:39,750 --> 00:13:41,260
You know,
the feeling that you have
333
00:13:41,250 --> 00:13:43,760
when you live with
your two best buddies
334
00:13:43,760 --> 00:13:46,260
in the whole wide world.
335
00:13:46,260 --> 00:13:47,260
We've already
changed the locks,
336
00:13:47,260 --> 00:13:49,260
don't make us
get a restraining order.
337
00:13:53,270 --> 00:13:54,770
I'll take it.
338
00:13:54,770 --> 00:13:56,770
( upbeat piano theme playing )
339
00:14:01,270 --> 00:14:02,780
Helen, I, uh...
340
00:14:02,780 --> 00:14:04,280
I wanna apologize
for the other day.
341
00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:05,780
I said some things
that I didn't mean.
342
00:14:05,780 --> 00:14:07,280
No. You know what?
It was my fault.
343
00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:09,780
You made a nice gesture
and I didn't appreciate it.
344
00:14:09,780 --> 00:14:11,290
No, it was my fault.
345
00:14:11,280 --> 00:14:13,290
It's silly that just
because you gave me something,
346
00:14:13,290 --> 00:14:14,290
I had to get you
something back.
347
00:14:14,290 --> 00:14:15,790
Right?
Right.
348
00:14:15,790 --> 00:14:17,290
Great. Now that we got that
out of the way.
349
00:14:21,290 --> 00:14:22,300
I got you
a little something,
350
00:14:22,300 --> 00:14:24,300
just to say
I'm sorry.
351
00:14:24,300 --> 00:14:25,800
You're kidding.
352
00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:29,300
Well, I did
the same thing for you.
353
00:14:29,300 --> 00:14:30,800
( both giggle )
354
00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:31,810
Okay, you go first.
355
00:14:31,810 --> 00:14:32,810
N-n-n-no, no.
You go first.
356
00:14:32,810 --> 00:14:33,810
Okay, but now,
let's agree
357
00:14:33,810 --> 00:14:35,310
that this is
where it ends, okay?
358
00:14:35,310 --> 00:14:37,310
I mean, this is not
a competition, right?
359
00:14:37,310 --> 00:14:38,310
Agreed.
Okay.
360
00:14:38,310 --> 00:14:40,310
( gasps )
361
00:14:40,310 --> 00:14:44,320
Oh, my gosh.
This is beautiful.
362
00:14:44,320 --> 00:14:46,320
Oh, this must've
been so expensive.
363
00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:47,320
( squeals )
364
00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:49,320
I can't wait to see
what you got for me.
365
00:14:53,330 --> 00:14:55,330
Uh, you know,
I-I-I just realized
366
00:14:55,330 --> 00:14:57,330
that this is the wrong size.
367
00:14:57,330 --> 00:14:59,830
So, uh,
I think I'm just gonna
368
00:14:59,830 --> 00:15:02,340
rush back to the stores
before they close.
369
00:15:04,340 --> 00:15:06,340
So now that Lowell
is gone, uh,
370
00:15:06,340 --> 00:15:08,840
I was able to get
another date with Denise.
371
00:15:08,840 --> 00:15:09,840
Denise?
372
00:15:09,840 --> 00:15:12,850
Oh. Oh, of course.
The big-faced girl.
373
00:15:14,350 --> 00:15:15,850
Look, you know,
374
00:15:15,850 --> 00:15:19,350
I-I'd be the firs to admit
she's not for everybody, but--
375
00:15:19,350 --> 00:15:20,850
Oh, I'm sorry, Antonio.
376
00:15:20,850 --> 00:15:22,860
As long as you like her.
377
00:15:22,860 --> 00:15:24,860
Oh, who am I kidding?
378
00:15:24,860 --> 00:15:26,860
I can't get past the face.
379
00:15:28,860 --> 00:15:30,360
It's like--
380
00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:32,870
It's like making love
to a jack-o'-lantern.
381
00:15:36,370 --> 00:15:37,370
Hey.
Morning Fay.
382
00:15:37,370 --> 00:15:38,370
FAY:
Morning.
383
00:15:40,370 --> 00:15:41,880
What-what--?
384
00:15:41,880 --> 00:15:43,880
Lowell. Lowell.
385
00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:45,880
Lowell.
( shouts )
386
00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:52,390
Morning.
387
00:15:57,890 --> 00:16:00,390
( upbeat piano theme playing )
388
00:16:00,390 --> 00:16:03,400
Damn it, Lowell,
you have a place of your own.
389
00:16:03,400 --> 00:16:05,400
Hey, just because
a guy gets a house
390
00:16:05,400 --> 00:16:07,400
doesn't mean
he has to sleep there.
391
00:16:08,900 --> 00:16:10,400
Don't you like
your new place?
392
00:16:10,400 --> 00:16:12,410
No.
Well, ain't no way
393
00:16:12,410 --> 00:16:13,910
you're comin' back to mine.
394
00:16:16,410 --> 00:16:17,910
I hate my house.
395
00:16:17,910 --> 00:16:18,910
Man, nobody lives there.
396
00:16:18,910 --> 00:16:20,410
All right, Lowell,
397
00:16:20,410 --> 00:16:23,420
if you go home,
you'll live there.
398
00:16:23,420 --> 00:16:25,420
Yeah, but--
399
00:16:25,420 --> 00:16:27,420
Ah, forget it.
You guys wouldn't understand.
400
00:16:27,420 --> 00:16:29,420
Understand what?
401
00:16:29,420 --> 00:16:32,930
Well, I-I've never
lived alone before.
402
00:16:32,930 --> 00:16:34,430
Never?
403
00:16:34,430 --> 00:16:35,430
No.
404
00:16:35,430 --> 00:16:37,430
I mean, at first
I lived with my family,
405
00:16:37,430 --> 00:16:39,430
and then I lived with Bunny,
406
00:16:39,430 --> 00:16:41,430
and then I moved in
with you guys.
407
00:16:41,430 --> 00:16:44,940
And now, you know,
in my house it's just me,
408
00:16:44,940 --> 00:16:46,940
all alone.
409
00:16:46,940 --> 00:16:48,440
Lonesome me.
410
00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:49,940
Old Lonesome Lowell.
411
00:16:49,940 --> 00:16:51,950
Yeah, yeah, alone.
We get it.
412
00:16:51,950 --> 00:16:55,450
LOWELL:
I mean, you know, I tried
to stay there last night,
413
00:16:55,450 --> 00:16:57,450
but after a couple
of hours, I uh--
414
00:16:57,450 --> 00:16:59,450
I just couldn't do it.
415
00:16:59,450 --> 00:17:02,960
Look, Lowell, I think
I can help you out here.
416
00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:05,460
Bein' on your own
for the first time is hard.
417
00:17:05,460 --> 00:17:06,460
Whoo, I know.
418
00:17:06,460 --> 00:17:08,960
Heh. When I was a kid
I shared a bedroom
419
00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:10,460
with my big brother Earl.
420
00:17:10,460 --> 00:17:11,970
( chuckling ):
Earl.
421
00:17:11,970 --> 00:17:14,470
I never spent one night
alone in that room
422
00:17:14,470 --> 00:17:15,970
until Earl had to go away.
423
00:17:16,970 --> 00:17:18,970
Oh, so he went off
to college?
424
00:17:18,970 --> 00:17:20,970
No, no.
Army?
425
00:17:20,970 --> 00:17:22,480
No.
426
00:17:22,480 --> 00:17:23,480
Well, where did he--?
427
00:17:23,480 --> 00:17:24,980
He just had to go away.
Okay?
428
00:17:26,980 --> 00:17:27,980
Anyway,
429
00:17:27,980 --> 00:17:30,980
Earl knew I'd be scared,
so before he left,
430
00:17:30,980 --> 00:17:34,490
he whispered in my ear,
"You can make it, Roy.
431
00:17:34,490 --> 00:17:35,490
You can make it."
432
00:17:35,490 --> 00:17:38,490
So that first night
when the shadows on the wall
433
00:17:38,490 --> 00:17:41,490
turned into scary faces,
I thought of Earl.
434
00:17:41,490 --> 00:17:43,500
When the branches
tappin' on the windows outside
435
00:17:43,500 --> 00:17:45,500
sounded like bad guys
tryin' to get in,
436
00:17:45,500 --> 00:17:47,000
I thought of Earl.
437
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,000
Before you knew it,
438
00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:50,000
it was morning
and I was just fine.
439
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:51,510
I had made it.
440
00:17:51,500 --> 00:17:53,510
I couldn't wait
for Earl to come back.
441
00:17:53,510 --> 00:17:56,010
I was so proud,
I wanted to tell him.
442
00:17:56,010 --> 00:17:58,010
But I--
443
00:17:58,010 --> 00:18:01,010
I never got the chance, I--
444
00:18:01,010 --> 00:18:03,520
I never saw Earl again.
445
00:18:03,520 --> 00:18:05,520
He died?
( sobs )
446
00:18:07,020 --> 00:18:10,020
Well, I just
wanna tell you, Lowell,
447
00:18:10,020 --> 00:18:11,020
that if you
can find something
448
00:18:11,020 --> 00:18:14,530
to help you make it through
that first night,
449
00:18:14,530 --> 00:18:15,530
you'll be okay too.
450
00:18:15,530 --> 00:18:16,530
( blows nose )
451
00:18:20,530 --> 00:18:22,040
You know what?
452
00:18:22,040 --> 00:18:23,040
I'm gonna do it.
453
00:18:23,040 --> 00:18:24,540
Hey.
454
00:18:24,540 --> 00:18:25,540
I-I gonna find something
455
00:18:25,540 --> 00:18:28,540
that'll help me get though
that first night, Roy.
456
00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:30,040
Thanks.
457
00:18:32,550 --> 00:18:36,050
That was the most moving story
I've ever heard.
458
00:18:36,050 --> 00:18:37,550
That must've been
really hard to tell.
459
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:38,550
You kidding?
460
00:18:38,550 --> 00:18:40,050
You know how many women
I've picked up
461
00:18:40,050 --> 00:18:42,560
using that bogus
dead Earl story?
462
00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:44,560
( upbeat piano theme playing )
463
00:18:50,060 --> 00:18:51,570
( knocking )
464
00:19:00,070 --> 00:19:02,080
CROWD:
Surprise.
465
00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:04,580
( chattering )
466
00:19:04,580 --> 00:19:05,580
We just thought
we'd drop by,
467
00:19:05,580 --> 00:19:08,080
give you kind of a surprise
housewarming party.
468
00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:09,080
Oh, wow.
469
00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:11,590
Listen, I mean,
that's really nice of you, but--
470
00:19:11,580 --> 00:19:12,590
But no, no.
Not buts, Lowell.
471
00:19:12,590 --> 00:19:14,090
We each brought you
a little gift.
472
00:19:14,090 --> 00:19:17,090
Uh, yes. I-I've found that
a well placed plant
473
00:19:17,090 --> 00:19:19,090
can spruce up
the whole house.
474
00:19:19,090 --> 00:19:20,090
See?
475
00:19:21,590 --> 00:19:24,600
And Alex and I, we bought you
a little champagne.
476
00:19:24,600 --> 00:19:26,600
And I got you some chocolates,
and I want you to know
477
00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,600
that I don't expect
anything in return.
478
00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:32,110
Yeah, right.
479
00:19:32,110 --> 00:19:33,110
Here, Lowell.
480
00:19:33,110 --> 00:19:35,610
Wow, a coat.
What a great gift.
481
00:19:35,610 --> 00:19:37,610
Uh, well actually
it's your coat.
482
00:19:37,610 --> 00:19:39,110
You left it at our house.
483
00:19:39,110 --> 00:19:40,610
Oh, thanks.
484
00:19:40,610 --> 00:19:43,120
Uh, did I leave that
stupid looking picture too?
485
00:19:44,620 --> 00:19:46,120
No, that's my gift.
486
00:19:47,620 --> 00:19:49,120
Oh, thanks.
487
00:19:49,120 --> 00:19:51,630
And, uh,
I-I brought you Paulo.
488
00:19:51,620 --> 00:19:53,130
Paulo?
Yeah.
489
00:19:53,130 --> 00:19:54,630
This is Paulo.
490
00:19:54,630 --> 00:19:57,630
He's not a real bird,
but he's good company.
491
00:19:57,630 --> 00:20:00,130
I-I got him
when I first came to town.
492
00:20:00,130 --> 00:20:03,140
Go ahead, talk to him.
S-s-see what happens.
493
00:20:03,140 --> 00:20:04,140
Uh, what should I say?
494
00:20:04,140 --> 00:20:05,640
What should I say?
495
00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:06,640
( both laugh )
496
00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:08,640
He-he likes you.
497
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,140
Well, thanks, Antonio.
498
00:20:10,140 --> 00:20:12,650
Yeah, yeah. But-but before
you take him away,
499
00:20:12,650 --> 00:20:14,650
could I just-just
do one thing?
500
00:20:14,650 --> 00:20:15,650
Yeah, sure.
501
00:20:19,150 --> 00:20:20,650
Goodbye, Antonio.
502
00:20:20,650 --> 00:20:22,160
Goodbye, Antonio.
503
00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:31,160
Antonio, hey,
your girlfriend,
504
00:20:31,160 --> 00:20:35,170
even if her face
is as big as a stop sign,
505
00:20:35,170 --> 00:20:36,670
don't let her get away.
506
00:20:39,670 --> 00:20:42,180
Well, hey, Lowell, I think
this place looks really great.
507
00:20:42,180 --> 00:20:43,680
It's got a lot of potential.
Oh.
508
00:20:43,680 --> 00:20:45,680
So how 'bout givin' us
a little tour?
509
00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:46,680
ALL:
Oh, yeah.
510
00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:49,680
Well-- Look, I know what
you guys are tryin' to do
511
00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:50,680
and I really appreciate it.
512
00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:54,190
But, you know, it doesn't matter
how long you stay,
513
00:20:54,190 --> 00:20:56,190
I'm still gonna be alone
eventually.
514
00:20:56,190 --> 00:20:57,690
We understand, Lowell.
515
00:20:57,690 --> 00:20:59,690
We just wanted to drop by
and say hello.
516
00:20:59,690 --> 00:21:02,200
ALL:
Hang in there, pal. Good luck.
You're gonna make it.
517
00:21:02,200 --> 00:21:03,700
Okay, thanks.
Okay?
518
00:21:03,700 --> 00:21:05,700
Take care of Paulo, eh?
519
00:21:14,210 --> 00:21:16,210
Are they gone?
( chuckles )
520
00:21:16,210 --> 00:21:18,710
Yeah. Boy, I-I thought
they were never gonna leave.
521
00:21:22,220 --> 00:21:23,220
Mm.
522
00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:28,720
Boy, I'm really glad
that you're staying the night.
523
00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:31,720
Well,
I couldn't leave you alone.
524
00:21:31,720 --> 00:21:35,730
Not after hearing that sad story
about your dead brother Earl.
525
00:21:37,730 --> 00:21:38,730
W-wait.
526
00:21:43,740 --> 00:21:45,740
( upbeat piano theme playing )
527
00:21:51,510 --> 00:22:04,260
( upbeat piano theme playing )
36616
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